AJC > Sports > Columnists > Archives > 2005 > October > 07 > Entry
DEL.ICIO.USWeekend Predictions
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
Jeff Schultz
Even the mightiest fall eventually. I mean, once the Roman Empire went kaput, all bets were off. Sure, they thought they were invincible, but then the personnel guy insisted on drafting some hotshot named Caligula, and, well, that didn’t turn out too good. Makes the Ryan Leaf pick look like nothing.
But the New England Patriots aren’t taking this decay thing real well. Couple of weeks ago, Bill Belichick stepped beyond even his usual cloak-and-dagger persona when he shooed away another team’s medical personnel away from a Patriot linemen. And all the guy wanted to do was make sure Matt Light wasn’t, like, dead.
Then last Sunday, the Pats got pounded by San Diego. That noted smack-talker, Marty Schottenheimer, who holds a doctorate in vanilla, made a seemingly harmless comment about injuries and player turnover sometimes catching up with a team. But Tom Brady reacted as if he said, “Marcia Brady throws a better spiral.”
Some people think there’s no way the Patriots could lose to the Falcons today because they lost last week and, therefore, they’re really, really mad.
Dude. These are football players. They don’t need a reason to hit somebody. They’re either good or they’re not good. The Patriots are still good. But they’re also 2-2 for a reason. Standard half-truths on the injury report notwithstanding, they are beat up and they have lost players. (They list 14 on the injury report.)
Michael Vick looks like a go. So does the Falcons’ running game. That should be enough here.
Out on a limb, Romulus: Falcons cover three.
FOUR BAGS • Steelers at Chargers: LaDainian Tomlinson already has eight touchdowns, which I think is more than my entire Fantasy League team, which of course is why I hate him. Go with Pitt (coming off a bye week) and 3.
THREE BAGS • Eagles at Cowboys: Donovan McNabb on Philly winning four of the last five meetings in Dallas: “Although I don’t have a star on the side of my helmet, it feels good to be in that place.” Puts him ahead of Bill Parcells. Eagles cover 3.
• Bucs at Spruce Goose: Vinny Testaverde, 41, is expected to start for the Jets, although it could depend on how his backup, Earl Morrall, looks in warm-ups. Tampa covers 3 on the road.
• Redskins at Broncos: Sorry, I’m just not feeling that Clinton Portis-Champ Bailey grudge match. Has any higher profile trade done less for either team? Denver wins, but take Wash and 7.
TWO BAGS • Dolphins at Bills: So if you’re J.P. Losman’s backup, where does that put you on the food chain? Just above plankton? Kelly Holcomb to the rescue! Bills cover 2 1/2.
• Colts at Phoney Niners: There’s this rule of thumb in the world of hypothetical sports wagering that you never lay two touchdowns in an NFL game with your hypothetical bookie, unless you want to lose your hypothetical hiney. But that thumb never saw the Niners’ secondary. Indy covers 141/2.
• Saints at Packers: Green Bay is 0-4 and Brett Favre (left) is on pace to throw 32 interceptions. I say we all let him get back on Vicodin. Ease the pain. Pack wins and covers the 3.
• Seahawks at Rams: Seattle QB Matt Hasselbeck said of the team’s offensive struggles: “I just do what I’m told.” So he’s passing the buck to a coach (Mike Holmgren) whose won Super Bowls? When did Hasselbeck start channeling Jeff George? Take the Rams to cover 3.
• Bengals at Jaguars: Some 4-0 teams are shams. Cincinnati isn’t one of them. Take the gift 3 but Cincy wins in straight upset.
• Panthers at Cardinals: Arizona is 0-3 in the U.S. and 1-0 in Mexico. It follow the Cards have petitioned the league to reverse the Mexican-American War, which of course is within the NFL’s authority. Carolina covers 2 1/2.
DON’T LOOK, YOU’LL GO BLIND • Ravens at Lions: Detroit’s Charles Rogers was suspended for four games after testing positive for drugs. Given his numbers, I’m assuming they weren’t performance enhancing. Take Baltimore and the 1 1/2.
• Titans at Texans: The first touchdown you see will clinch the game. The second touchdown you see is a message you’ve had too much beer. Take Houston to cover 3.
• Bears at Browns: Cleveland’s next five opponents are a combined 4-12. Chicago’s next six opponents are a combined 7-14. The problem with both stats: They stink themselves. Take the Bears and 3.
PROFIT MARGINS Last week (ugh): 8-6 straight up, 8-6 against the line.
Overall (feh): 35-24 straight up, 29-29-1 against the line.
Peerless Price Cowboys Up: 4 weeks, 2 DNPs, 1 catch, minus-1 yard.
Permalink | Comments (7) | Categories: Falcons / NFL, Jeff Schultz
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By Rick
October 8, 2005 09:17 AM | Link to this
Get him back on vicodin? man that is COLD. But in all honesty I cannot see why he got off it to begin with, I have been hooked on pain killers for 3-4 years and have no plans on stoppin
By larry w.
October 8, 2005 12:23 PM | Link to this
Jeff I couldn’t agree with you more. There was absolutely nothing offensive or disrepectful about Schottenheimer’s comments toward the Patriots. I sense that a degree of panic is starting to seep into the collective psyche of the Patriots. I think that they may have started to doubt themselves and are going a bit overboard trying to convince themselves and their opponents that they are still the best around. Deep down inside, I think the Patriots know that they are about to step into one heck of a rumble on Sunday.
By Joe Roman
October 8, 2005 06:22 PM | Link to this
Jeff. Have you been taking your funny pills again? Seriously, very funny stuff. Actual predictions with scores instead of all this sports gambler jargon would be refreshing. Sports gambling, other than paramutuel horse betting gives me the runs. It taints the games. Nothing has changed since the Black Sox. Sports bookies are leeches-always have been always will be.
By geechee
October 8, 2005 07:44 PM | Link to this
Well I’m satisfied with that win. All I care about is the W. All my fellow fans who have stated all year that the offense just is not scoring enough compared to all the talent they have may of course not be satisfied. I’ve said since day one that this was a good looking team by anyone standards. They kicked their butts up and down the field, their field I might add. Richt now 17-2 on opponents field. Hopefully this will quiet the UGA is good but they need an offensive coordinator. I know one thing, they can’t say 27-7 is a good margin but they won’t beat teams like Tennessee playing offense like that. Get out of town. Bring on the Gators, Horns, VaTech (as Vick says), and even that Trojan horse cause as I said, I’m satisfied with this team. How ‘bout them silver britches? GO DOGS!!!
By Nomah
October 9, 2005 06:12 PM | Link to this
Geechee, do you feel compelled to submit an entry on every single blog on this site? Get a hobby, dude.
By CJ
October 10, 2005 04:05 PM | Link to this
Dude, your picks for this past week were awful. Just plain awful. I know you have a job to do and that it’s a tough business (picking games and spreads, etc.) but why even GO there? Why make these picks when a) it’s so darn difficult, and b) you’re so lousy at it? Is it required of you to do so? If you have an option, I’d bow out of the whole picking games thing and find something else you’re good at.
By Bubbba
October 11, 2005 04:56 PM | Link to this
CJ, why are you complaining? If his picks are so bad, and they are, then just wait for his picks, call your book, and bet the opposite.
Bubba