AJC > Sports > Columnists > Archives > 2005 > August > 27 > Entry
DEL.ICIO.USPREDICTIONS: Hey, it’s only two losses
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
Jeff Schultz
We are counting down the days to the start of the college football season, which isn’t always an easy thing to do. Fortunately, there are tools to help us. Schedules. Calendars. Or, in the case of Georgia players, little scratch marks on prison walls.
At last count, I think 27 players had been suspended for the opening kickoff of the Boise State game, which is as tough as punishment gets in Athens. Even Uga was asked to run steps for disciplinary reasons. (Something about the fleabag using his camera phone to take pictures of the answer key in obedience school, then scooting out to the hallway to erase the evidence. I dunno. I can’t imagine a player ever doing that.)
Fortunately, for Georgia fans, all that really matters is Mark Richt is 34-6 in the past three seasons. So about this season’s priorities:
Sept. 3, Boise State: It’s the year’s fashionable upset pick, which just tells you everybody is ignoring Chapter 3, Section 2, Page 16 of the Weekend Predictions Investment and Turbo Tax Cheat Codes Handbook: Don’t ever get sucked in by a team that plays its best football at home on blue plastic grass. These dudes will be catatonic just from the first Bubba Beergut they spot selling mushy peanuts on 316. Dogs win.
Sept. 10, Spurrier: But if they don’t beat Boise State, what’s the over/under on tight sphincters in Athens for this game? Yeah, yeah, South Carolina stinks. But the Poultry seldom make things easy for Georgia, and neither does this coach. It’ll be close. But make that 2-0.
Sept. 17, Louisiana-Monroe: This school has gone from Ouachita Parish Junior College to Northeast Center of Louisiana State to Northeast Junior College of Louisiana State to Northeast Louisiana State College to Northeast Louisiana University to University of Louisiana-Monroe. They can run all they like, but they can’t escape the fact they gave the world Bubby Brister. Georgia to 3-0.
Sept. 24, at Mississippi State: According to the city’s Web site, Starkville “offers a unique blend of old Southern charm and 21st century technology.” Unfortunately, both are housed inside a Wal-Mart. Make that 4-0.
Bye week: Richt has players form a conga line in leg chains. Athens sleeps peacefully.
Oct. 8, at Tennessee: Somebody’s been drinking too much orange Kool-Aid. People are talking title game in Vowel-land but there’s a good chance Tennessee will be 2-2 coming into this game (losses at Florida and LSU). So what happens when the Shockley Defining Moment happens in Knoxville and Phat Phil rolls into Tuscaloosa 2-3? Bulldogs to 5-0. (Really, I didn’t plan it this way.)
Oct. 15, at Vanderbilt: Upset! (Ratings trick.) 6-0. My hate mail from Athens plummets.
Oct. 22, Arkansas: It’s homecoming. Georgia has lost three homecoming games in the past 41 years. Fortunately, nobody ever found the bodies. Dogs continue their best start since 2002, when they went 8-0 before losing to Florida. (Foreshadowing. Writer’s trick.)
Oct. 29, Florida, Jacksonville: Splat! OK, little Chihuahuas: Take your 7-0 start and a win over the Zooker last year and be happy with it. Urban (Meyer) Renewal is about to do a tap dance in your head. Gators, Gators, Gators.
Oct. 30-Nov. 11: Georgia fans complain they were jobbed by officials.
Nov. 12, Auburn: Last year, the Dogs left Auburn with a 24-6 loss and only 68 percent of their body parts. But most of the Tigers’ offense is now in the NFL, and Georgia gets the leftovers a week before the Alabama game. Dogs to 8-1.
Nov. 19, Kentucky: Rich Brooks has hired four new assistants, which is sort of like fitting the Elephant Man with fresh socks. Easy win. National Title Hopes Revived!
Nov. 26, at Georgia Tech: In 2000, Jim Donnan lost this game, fell to 7-4 and lost his job, but was allowed to experience all the tradition of the Oahu Bowl. I have some good news for Richt: He won’t lose his job after this game and he won’t go to the Oahu Bowl. But he’s going down. Jackets pull season-ending upset.
Permalink | Comments (59) | Categories: Jeff Schultz, UGA / SEC
Comments
Commenting is now closed for this entry.
By GW
August 27, 2005 07:39 PM | Link to this
Beat Tennessee in Knoxville and lose to Tech with more fans in red than gold in the stands? Tech must be in for some kind of great season or Reggie Ball will be out hurt.
By dawgfan
August 27, 2005 07:39 PM | Link to this
I really respect your picks. But the dogs will not lose to fla or tech just ut and will win the east b/c fla and ut will each have two con.. loses go dawgs ps Leak will get killed in the east running the option
By T
August 27, 2005 09:27 PM | Link to this
Leave Bubby alone. His only fan left in Pittsburgh, T
By Ralph
August 27, 2005 09:28 PM | Link to this
You Muttlanders are by far the dumbest people in the world. You think it is all so great and wonderful that a lot of you show up at Bobby Dodd. Little do you realize that by showing up, you help Tech out.
We’ll take your money and then send you back to Muttland with your tail between your legs.
We appreciate the support, as always.
Go Jackets!!!
By BG
August 27, 2005 10:04 PM | Link to this
Another typical Nerd response from a techie (Ralph). Yeah, and I bet you make lots more money than all of us, popped a Georgia cheerleader,etc…. Enjoy your free hot dog and coke with ticket purchase!
By Hunkerdown
August 27, 2005 10:54 PM | Link to this
Good one Ralph. How exactly do we help you out by showing up to your sorry stadium?
When was the last time you sent us back to muttland with our tail between our legs?
Newsflash Trekkie. Past 3 years…
UGA - 104 GT - 37
Nice try though.
By Bill
August 27, 2005 11:03 PM | Link to this
What is your problem? Why the unneccessary shot at UGA in the beginning of your editorial? Seems classless IMO. It turns what could have been valid analysis into mindless drivel, and points to the reason why UGA fans refused to pay for the online version of the AJC. It’s not worth paying for garbage. In fact, It’s not even worth my time for free. I am going to delete the link entirely like many other UGA fans have already done. JERK!
By johngio
August 27, 2005 11:04 PM | Link to this
UGA loses to UT BIG , FLA, and AUB…Tech is a toss up
By J-Dawg
August 27, 2005 11:10 PM | Link to this
So, you’re a free site again. Did your ego actually allow you to think people would PAY to read your drivel. That’s really kind of sad. Talk about a fleabag. I’ll give you this much: you know how to hold a grudge. You must be a very unhappy fellow.
By Roe
August 27, 2005 11:13 PM | Link to this
(Yawn)
By Bob MUllis
August 27, 2005 11:31 PM | Link to this
Bet your wife or should i say room mate who ever he may be, hate to see u walk thur the door. I would like to buy u for what u are worth and sell u for what u think u are worth. A douch bag u are. DOUCH BAG.
By Bryan G.
August 27, 2005 11:33 PM | Link to this
“Hey it’s only two losses” really isn’t an appropriate title to a column claiming that UGA will lose to a certain inferior opponent in Atlanta.
Ridiculous. Did Reggie Ball stop taking suck pills this offseason or soemthing?
By SeminoleDog
August 27, 2005 11:42 PM | Link to this
Nerds kissing nerds. How cute you are. Drivel is way too kind, and you’re definitely not a journalist. Entertainer, maybe. You must get a bonus for or a bon*r from stirring the stink pot as that seems to be your one and only talent…but the hair-do is aces.
By Philip L
August 28, 2005 12:07 AM | Link to this
What negative reporting and ridiculous comments. You don’t seem to have much respect for Coach Richt and his dicipline measures. I am proud of our players, not necessarily all of their actions. I am extremely proud of our coach and think he is doing a good job of being a role model and bringing leadership and discipline to young men that need it. Go Dawgs!
By Steve
August 28, 2005 02:31 AM | Link to this
DOGS suck…..end of story he’s right…….they lose a close one in Atlanta
By Jeff Schultz
August 28, 2005 05:22 AM | Link to this
Tech will never win a big game with Reggie Ball at QB. Maybe with a 5th down or a non-fumble they have a chance, but it would take some serious homecooking for them to knock someone off. They are a bunch of cheating nerds, and the AJC is not even worth using to wrap fish.
By kendall
August 28, 2005 06:43 AM | Link to this
You shouldnt let your little hurt feelings show so much Jeff. CMR thinks you are a pee-on journalist just like the rest of us do and you know it, therefore, you lay out the cheap shots at him and the university. Too bad we really dont care so much about you. As far as tech and their bravado? What a bunch of camry driving nerds. Yeah, they are REALLY doing well over there.
By Michael Cox
August 28, 2005 09:13 AM | Link to this
Look….problem is Reggie (The Choke Artist) Ball is a loser! There’s a reason we didn’t recruit him. If he can’t beat you he will beat up one of your coaches. Certainly Calvin is regretting his decision by now! Dawgs win easily!
By Jeff
August 28, 2005 09:48 AM | Link to this
Wow, some people need to lighten up, it’s called humor. And learn to spell “douche” right.
Go Dogs!
By Herpetic Whitlow
August 28, 2005 10:25 AM | Link to this
Jeff Schultz: the sports page’s potty humor penman. Hey- guess that’s what it takes to sell papers to North Campus Poindexters.
By Jeff Schultz Augusta 28, 2005 10:33 AM | Link to this Easy guys, my poopy don’t stink.
By SDBUGAFAN
August 28, 2005 11:07 AM | Link to this
I agree with most of your picks, but being a UGA fan living in Tennessee, I don’t see UGA coming up here and winning. Not this year, UT will not be 2-2 entering this game. The UF game will be too close to call, but losing to Tech? Not with Reggie Ball at QB.
By HobNailBoot
August 28, 2005 12:07 PM | Link to this
Our defense, like most other teams, will decide our fate. If we have reloaded well and become more of a ball-hawking defense that forces turnovers, we will be fine and have a fighting chance to win them all. Jeff Shultz knows as well as anyone; making predictions as to winning and losing long before games are played is just talk - he’s just fishing for emotional outbursts from Dawg fans and immature Brat drivel from Tech fans.
By deepsouthdawg
August 28, 2005 12:58 PM | Link to this
it realy doesn’t matter what jeff thinks about tech we know uga has better players and a smarter coach so tech people all I can say is go and engineer a way to get over your loss on nov. 26th and try to engineer another Bobby Ross while your at it I think UGA will have a though time in Tenn. but UF is just riding the Urban Meyer hipe wave that they have created in Gainesville so they will all feal better about their little lizard team Oh by the way didn’t they get beat by two bulldogs teams last year
By Jeff Schultz
August 28, 2005 04:09 PM | Link to this
For what it’s worth, there is a blog posted here by somebody who signed as JEFF SCHULTZ. I realize there are some small, insignificant people in this world who have the courage of a gnat and won’t post their own name. But for what it’s worth, I didn’t write the aforementioned blog. This is the real me. JS
By andy andrews
August 28, 2005 04:36 PM | Link to this
any one know where bubby brister is living?…got a restraining order on him in the state of colorado…seems his threat to mike of Broncos’ was a new way of life for him to get Press…andy a
By John
August 28, 2005 05:55 PM | Link to this
Jeff must be upset that Tech’s star got busted for being the East coast representative of the California (according to the AJC) cocaine cartel, but that isn’t really a reason to jump all over UGA, unless of course the Tech dealer was Jeff’s source.
By jschultz5022
August 28, 2005 08:17 PM | Link to this
You guys are really mean and you hurt my feelings. I realize that GT has much better crack on North Avenue than I can get in Athens, but I really just wanted to take a cheap shot at the dawgs because I’m a tiny little worm with a pen. No matter what I write, my editor will publish it because I bring him donuts and coffee every morning. I feel really big and powerful when I take cheap shots at the state’s flagship university. Please try to understand that it’s much easier to write garbage than provide quality journalism. My job is easy and I don’t want to lose it by trying to think too hard. Thanks for your understanding - Jeff S.
By Victor Newman
August 28, 2005 10:20 PM | Link to this
Jeff Shultz is a French Poodle without hair. AJC could do sooooo much better without that loser….
By jschultz5024
August 29, 2005 12:13 AM | Link to this
Sometimes I just like to play like I’m not a balding has-been part-timing hack journalist. I’m pretty worried that they will relegate me to blog/online only. I do NOT want to go back to authoring car ads again. You know, you guys need to remember, I’m trying to feed a family here. A big family of hamsters, tarantulas, and snakes. And you could count my Darth Vader helmet, but it’s actually inanimate. Like my humor, say you. Sometimes I sit awake at night and count the glow-in-the-dark Joe Hamiltons on my celing and wonder where my place is in this world. Then I look at my William Shatner blow-up doll and I know…I just know. -JS
By DawgMan
August 29, 2005 12:24 AM | Link to this
I guess the AJC membership really is hurting. They have resorted to asking sports writers to try and stir up talk. Well at least Schultz didn’t have a good reputation to lose anyway. After we walk out of Yech with another win where we had more fans at their stadium, we can talk again
By Mark
August 29, 2005 06:44 AM | Link to this
Jeff, Why would you write such negative comments, and then whine when people take it personally retaliating on a message board intentionally put here to guage the readers responses? What did you expect? Your whole methodology is all about stirring up the readers. You stir them up, and them complain that they are taking shots at you when you take shots at their University and coach. Guess what? CMR’s family reads the paper also, and they probably don’t like you either. You made this bed, so enjoy the night’s sleep.
By Anders Womack
August 29, 2005 07:00 AM | Link to this
Jeff Schultz’s column is the armpit of the sports page: Funny at times, If those times include you being 8 years old. But as time goes on, it just stinks.
Here’s to Schultzie’s craptastic craft: May a thousand school papers learn what’s not funny.
By 2LT Jonathan Fallin
August 29, 2005 08:03 AM | Link to this
Guys, cmon its called sarcasm. You think Sylvestor Croom i sgoing to get upset about the Walmart comment? I thought it was hilarious. It’s also an opinion about FOOTBALL. Cmon lighten up, there are way more important things in life to get upset about, and seriuosly, pretending to be someone else is lame.
Jeff, Keep writing cause I laugh everytime I read your material. If everyone just did scores it would be boring. I liken the comments to the old leonard’s losers…very similar. At least people are writing about us and we get upset about the thought of 2 losses, or losing to Tech, when I was at UGA, losing to them was a reality(97-01).
Seriously…dawgs have a great year, and even if we don’t it isn’t life or death.
By TennDawg
August 29, 2005 09:50 AM | Link to this
A note to Jeff Schultz, the behavioral and disciplinary problems you refer to regarding UGA happen EVERYWHERE, EVERY YEAR and ALWAYS HAVE. It goes on coast-to-coast, big-time D-1 to D-3 and even at places like, oh no…Tech (just look at this past years problems). Speaking of Tech, the students, fans and alum are amazing. You boast of this wonderful amount of superior knowledge and brain power, but yet make such ridiculous and unintelligent remarks regarding UGA vs. Tech football. Numbers don’t lie, look them up, they are NOT good for y’all. On the other hand, 34-6 says it all for the Dawgs. Your coach is awful, your QB is spotty at best and the overall talent and depth just isn’t that good. Do us all a favor - go have a good season (8 or more wins) for a couple of years and then come to these blogs hyping-up your gridiron supremacy. Go Dawgs!
By Jeff Schultz
August 29, 2005 10:22 AM | Link to this
I am so touched that so many people want to be me.
By C-Mac
August 29, 2005 10:51 AM | Link to this
Is Shultz a GT alum? If so, his shots at UGA players are especially ludicrious given the recent cocaine conviction of their cornerback. These players are human and prone to mistakes. BTW, DJ Shockley is the man! Regardless of his play this year, he has already shown that he has more character in is pinky finger than Jeff Shultz has in his entire body….(bald head notwithstanding).
By Jeff Schultz
August 29, 2005 12:53 PM | Link to this
C-Mac … I just answered a blog that suggested I was a Georgia homer. I think you two guys should get together and decide what my biases are. Then let me know and I’ll take it from there. Jonathan … Thanks for getting it. Dawgfan … I went out on a limb on the Tech game, but I’m riding Florida this year. Maybe I’m just drinking the Kool-Aid. To someone claiming to be Jeff Schultz … Never wrap fish in the sports section. The newsprint wipes off and then you’ve got a big mess. To Bill and others who seem taken aback by the sarcasm … This was sort of the intro to the annual Weekend Predictions column. We don’t deal in serious analysis. If I ever write a column breaking down coverages and blocking tendencies, it won’t be in Weekend Predictions. Thanks for all the comments. Not surprisingly, the numbers dwarfed the Tech predictions’ column. JS
By What's a Cat-hat?
August 29, 2005 01:07 PM | Link to this
I respect Schultz’s uncompromising writing style, but fail to see how rubbing salt in the wounds of the largest fan base in the state one week before the season begins is the best business decision. Getting a rise out of everyone is a good idea in theory. It gets everyone talking, visiting the site, etc. But is anyone really going to buy more papers as a result? More than likely, the opposite will occur. It’s obvious no one was paying the online Sports Plus fee. But I’ll leave it up to the professionals.
And the jab about a one game suspension being the worst punishment falls a little flat when everyone knows that Richt kicked two former/potential starters off the team.
There’s a few good one-liners though (never found the bodies, elphant man). Good stuff.
Oh, and no way the Dogs lose to Tech. When Tech plays a good defense (e.g. UGA’s), they fold like an expensive lawn chair (Not a cheap one. Those dang things are hard to fold, and you usually end up pinching the crap out of your finger in the process)
By Houston-DAWG
August 29, 2005 05:40 PM | Link to this
Tech beats Ga in Atlanta. All we need is Reggie Ball talking smack like last time in Atlanta. He will get KNOCKED the %&@$ out…..AGAIN. Cheap shots at UGA will get you smacked around too. Hopefully your boyfriend will read the article and slap some sense into ya.
By Houston-DAWG
August 29, 2005 05:42 PM | Link to this
Tech Beats UGA????? All my DAWGS need is for Reggie small Ball to start talking trash again. Just like he did the last time we were in Atlanta. I believer he was KNOCKED OUT. Oh yea, are you guys banning Belue from the press box still? Talk about a bunch of whining babies.
By wayne
August 29, 2005 08:51 PM | Link to this
SCREW YOU!!
By Vowel Fan
August 29, 2005 10:22 PM | Link to this
I’m laughing too much to type. Welcome to reality dogs.
By mikey
August 30, 2005 07:16 AM | Link to this
Season ending upset by Jacketts??? Yeah right…and Tech will beat Miami 51-7…..You must have been talking to Lou this week!!
By JR
August 30, 2005 08:40 AM | Link to this
Good grief. You dog (sp?) fans sure do get your panties in a bunch easily. This is an entertainment column. Disagree, state your reasons, throw a quick jabs at your intrastate rival, then have your morning coffee and get to work at the drive-through. Its not a matter of life-or-death that Jeff picks your team to beat everyone on their schedule. Simple fact is, you wont beat everyone. I think that the ladies doth protest too much about the Tech pick, because you are eacha nd every one a little scared of Calvin Johnson. You see that all Ball has to do is loft the pigskin up in the middle of the secondary, and CJ will come down with it like Shaq playing against a middle school team. I also find it funny that you guys see a big difference between Shockley and Ball. Both mobile, perhaps too much for their own good, with decent but undistinguished arms. Either could make or break their schools’ seasons. Tech’s got a good defense this year, guys. You may not score more than twice. Are you sure you can keep CJ out of the endzone? I dont think you are.
By Jeff Schultz
August 30, 2005 09:01 AM | Link to this
J.R. I owe you a beer. JS
By Chuck
August 30, 2005 10:20 AM | Link to this
How sad that your response to Coach Richt’s anger at your classless slap at DJ Shockley’s character (even after he apologized), is to pitch a howling hissy-fit every time you write about UGA.
Why don’t you just apologize to DJ Shockley? Or are you nowhere near a man enough to acknowledge the hurt you cased that fine young man?
I guess your columns to-date more than answer that question.
By TennDawg
August 30, 2005 10:37 AM | Link to this
JR - Thanks for the lesson on the “entertainment column.” Dawg fans don’t get “our panties in a bunch” with the actual columns per say, but rather the Tech folks like yourself that talk-the-talk, eventhough their football team can’t walk-the-walk. As I said yesterday, all Tech needs to do is go post a few good years together (shoot for let’say - 13,11 & 10 win seasons)and then the fans can come back here ranting, raving and calling-out all they want. Until then, your trash-talking is just that, trash. I will say this in agreement with you, Calvin Johson is an awesome talent. Unfortunately for him though, it takes a quarterback to get him the ball and nine others to do their collective jobs to be a success (ie: win some games). Here’s a bet - CJ will catch some passes in Atlanta come 11/26, but Mr. Blue and co. will do just fine! Then maybe you and JS can shed a tear in your beers.
By david j
August 30, 2005 11:07 AM | Link to this
wow, some angry fans out there. Come out to Phoenix and enjoy the 112 heat—that will make you angry. Anyway, DAWGS will win 10 and go SEC title game and beat LSU 30-27—-I hope Katrina spared most of yall. GO DAWGS
By AUtiger
August 30, 2005 11:10 AM | Link to this
I haven’t heard too many good things about Shockley from the spring camp. And this is coming from Georgia diehards..looks like they’re overhyped. And over-rated.
By Spanky
August 30, 2005 11:31 AM | Link to this
Jeff, apparently you don’t really know anything about football (much like any other tek fan), and your column is for “entertainment”? Forgive me, I thought that if the ever-prestigeous AJC (now THAT’S funny) would post your column in the SPORTS section, in the NEWSpaper, then it would be SPORTS NEWS! Oh!…entertainment time! Okay! Your next column should be “Am I , or am I not that creepy old alone man in a nightclub, sitting at the end of the bar, trying to hook up with MUCH younger girls (much like any other tek fan)?”
By Chris
August 30, 2005 12:21 PM | Link to this
You’re 2 loss prediction is not bad, one of them will NOT be to the insects…oh, and you’re an a*.
By GoCocks
August 30, 2005 01:01 PM | Link to this
I honestly cannot wait until around 9:30pm on September 10th to post another comment. Please keep overlooking us Gamecocks. Do you think you still have Greene and Pollack playing? We love kicking your behinds in Athens. It’s so much fun and we’re gonna do it again!!! Go Cocks!!!!!!!!!!PS: Remember this name KO SIMPSON….nuff said!
By DAVE MCDANIEL
August 30, 2005 03:30 PM | Link to this
GA SHOULD GET TECH AND AUBURN, TENN AND FL WILL BE CLOSE. LIKE YOUR STYLE EVEN THOUGH I FREQUENTLY DON’T AGREE. GO DAWGS!
By war dawg
August 30, 2005 04:54 PM | Link to this
flea bag? You must go home and beat your dog every time something good happens for UGA.
Your a Tech HOMO.. I mean HOMER well, you know what you are.
By Chuck_Uuga
August 30, 2005 06:30 PM | Link to this
Very funny stuff on here! SC fans talking a win in Athens, Vol fans calling UGA “overrated,” others saying Ball is comparable to Shockley, Calvin Johnson cannot be covered (never mind how Tech will cover Leonard Pope). All this is great stuff! But the facts are this: UGA is L-O-A-D-E-D. Mark Richt coached at FSU for 15 years. He has built an FSU-like program in Athens. Does that mean UGA will go 11-0 every year? No. What it does mean is UGA will win 9+ games EVERY YEAR for the forseeable future unless they experience MAJOR injury problems. I know the truth hurts for you rivals. But this is reality. I look forward to watching a team with potentially as much talent as any team in UGA history in 2005. Just win the SEC East is all I care about. The rest will fall in place. As usual, the media will be WRONG about UGA.
I’ll be in the Dome on December 3rd watching the Dogs play LSU or Bama.
By Brett
August 30, 2005 08:05 PM | Link to this
I’m not a big Reggie Ball fan for multiple reasons, but question whether he should be compared to Shockley is a bit queer don’t you think? And that means “odd” you morons. Shockley hasn’t exactly looked sharp the last few times we saw him, has he? There’s enough talent around to help him out, but the kid hasn’t done anything to make him a star since he got on campus (a long time ago). Ball is inconsistent. Could be really good, could be equally as bad.
By John Dean
September 1, 2005 11:31 AM | Link to this
Little over optimistic there dawg-fans. Shockley can’t throw worth a damn and half your team is suspended or in jail. Richt is a great coach, but will lose to BSU, TN, and FL. Good luck guys, you’ll need it.
By ugabites
September 2, 2005 11:44 AM | Link to this
The AJC should step up their drug testing policy. I want some of what you and Ralph are taking.
By Spanky
September 6, 2005 10:45 AM | Link to this
Excuse me, paging John Dean, so Shockley can’t throw worth a damn, heh? 5 TD passes and 1 TD run isn’t bad in any book! Sit down and shut up!