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Home > Jeff Schultz > Archives > 2008 > September > 25
Thursday, September 25, 2008
Pro golf in Atlanta jinxed
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
Somewhere in Atlanta, there is a Voodoo doll fashionably attired in Lacoste and Footjoy, with needles sticking out of its forehead.
It’s as if the pro golf scene here is dropping into a black hole. The LPGA pulled the plug at Eagles Landing two years ago. The AT&T Classic at Sugarloaf exited in May after tournament organizers phoned 125 potential sponsors over six months and then heard this: Click.
The Tour Championship? It looked great on paper. Tiger Woods was on that paper. Playoff drama was on that paper. Somebody lost that paper.
Boo Weekley, goofball centerpiece of last week’s Ryder Cup, doing the Happy Gilmore gallop from the clubhouse to the first tee would’ve been a nice way to kick things off Thursday. But Weekley isn’t here. Also, there’s some football game in Athens on Saturday drawing attention.
“Tour Championship” should be two powerful words. But only two other words could’ve pushed Thursday’s opening onto the radar locally: Free gas.
Instead, we were left with relatively empty bleachers and connect-the-dot galleries for a season-ending tournament that pays $1.26 million to the winner. It was all a bit deflating.
“Atlanta will survive this,” said Dave Kaplan, director of the outgoing AT&T Classic, who on this day announced competitors as they walked up to the 18th green.
“When I think of the years we played the tournament the week before the Masters, we only made two cuts on Friday in eight years because of weather issues. In 2005 when we had total rainouts on Thursday and Friday, then on Saturday I’m sitting on the patio club at Sugarloaf and it starts to snow. Hail, sleet, snow, rain — I think we had it all in eight years.”
Yes, the PGA will survive. The Tour Championship will survive. The FedEx Cup will survive, although somebody needs to run this system through a food processor quick.
This is supposed is to bring together the top 30 players on the Tour. But because of a convoluted point system, the field includes Bubba Watson, who’s a great guy, colorful figure and solid golfer, but declared: “I’m here and it’s not right. If we really had a tournament with the top 30 players, I’m not here. I’ve never won a tournament in my life. I’m 97th in the world. I’ll take the checks and if they say, ‘You can go to the Masters,’ I’ll go. But nobody in the world would say I’m top 30.”
Anthony Kim was the only one who looked top 30 on Thursday. He shot 6-under. The course finished second. Everybody else followed. Only five golfers broke par. Vijay Singh was 3-over. Sergio Garcia was even. Stewart Cink 5-over.
If you’re a sponsor or a TV executive, you once embraced the possibility of an $11.26 million putt on Sunday to win the tournament and the FedEx Cup. Now, you’re sitting at the other end of the cache spectrum.
The embankment in front of the 18th green has the word “Playoffs” painted in large white letters. Presumably, there wasn’t enough paint for, “Exhibition.” Unless he collapses, Singh has the $10 million bonus locked up. He could lug a six-pack around East Lake every day and it wouldn’t make a difference.
Come to think of it, it would help the ratings.
“The playoffs have been kind of quiet, obviously,” said Ryuji Imada, the former Georgia golfer whose first Tour win was the final AT&T Classic. “Without Tiger, there’s probably only about half the excitement. We have a lot of good players and good golf here, but there’s only one Tiger.”
It’s unfortunate. This tournament and East Lake officials deserve better. D.J. Trahan, an Atlanta native and Clemson alum, believes golf fans will still pay attention this week. But he knows the Georgia-Alabama game is dominating the landscape.
“I guess I should say, ‘Go Dogs,’” he said, smiling. “Alabama kicked the living daylights out of my Tigers, and I never liked Alabama, anyway. I don’t know. Maybe we can be the second-biggest draw this week.”
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Traumatic week ends with UGA win
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
This has been a traumatic week for all of us. Larry Munson retired. Nick Saban and Alabama coaches did standup routines on funerals. Clay Aiken announced he was gay. (I thought every sense had been crushed until I tried to imagine any of the subjects and news events being shuffled, at which point I just blacked out.)
Just when we could take more, PETA told us we are evil for eating “Chunky Monkey.”
Yes, Tracy Reiman, who speaks for the organization that should have just stepped off stage last year and has way too much time on its hands, sent a letter to Ben and Jerry’s, saying: “The fact that human adults consume huge quantities of dairy products made from milk that was meant for a baby cow just doesn’t make sense. Everyone knows that, ‘The breast is best!’”
At which point, she did not lift her shirt and shout, “Throw me your beads!”
So she lost me.
(Check the cover of next week’s “People” for Clay Aiken’s take.)
PETA wants Ben and Jerry’s to start using breast milk to make ice cream so as to “lessen the suffering of dairy cows and their babies.”
Look, I’m getting a wonderful visual for the factory. Also the job interviews. But I would think all the best candidates for said pumping factory might also have a problem with the process. Plus, I’m just not feeling the product.
Now, some people think Georgia is milking way too much out of this whole “Blackout” thing. (I went to J-school for that transition.) Not me. Did you see how players reacted last year? Have you seen T-shirt sales?
And what possessed Saban to allow some yahoo with a video camera at practice to videotape his own strength and conditioning coach saying: “They’re wearing black because they’re going to a [multi-syllabic expletive] funeral.”
Oh, that’s smart. Welcome to the Pat Dye school of, “They’re not man enough,” boneheaded things to say game week. Milk this: Dogs cover seven.
NFL Six-Pack (I drank one) Falcons at Carolina: The Falcons have beaten two teams (Lions, Chiefs) that have lost six games and nine major organs. Now they go on the road to Carolina and Green Bay, which means two things: 1) We get to find out how good they really are; 2) It’ll be three weeks before the marketing department doesn’t have to lie about another “sellout” (“Empty seats? What empty seats? Look over there, Sasquatch!”) The Panthers somehow lost to Minnesota last week. Here’s their bounce back: Carolina covers seven.
Eagles at Bears: Philly receiver Hank Baskett has been linked to Playboy bazoom cartoon Kendra Wilkinson. Why do I suddenly crave ice cream? Eagles cover.
Bills at Rams: St. Louis has been outscored 38-3, 41-13 and 37-13. Before long, they’re either going to be dead or in the Sun Belt. Buffalo covers eight.
Packers at Bucs: Looking at a boxscore. It says Brian Griese threw for 407 yards last week. OK. I stop doing hallucinogens today. Take the Pack and the cheese (one point).
Oy-hio: Great rumor going around: Bill Cowher has purchased a home outside of Cleveland and therefore must be ready to take over the Browns. Last year’s rumor had Cowher owning a home in North Carolina and therefore preparing to assume the throne at N.C. State. If I’m Cowher, I plant a rumor about eyeing property in Rio, Maui and the Caribbean, just to see where it goes. Bengals cover 3 1/2.
Faber College (Where Knowledge is Good) UT-Knoxville at Auburn: The Vols are 1-2 going on Shreveport. Phil Fulmer said this week “We know what we’re doing.” QB Jonathan Crompton said last week, after losing to Florida, 30-6, “We should’ve won the game, in my opinion.” So they’re on the same page. Unfortunately, the library is on Neptune. Tigers cover 6 1/2.
Petrino’s Penance (cont.): Great times in Fayetteville. The NCAA slapped the track program with three years probation after an assistant coach was convicted of embezzlement, and the school continued to pay out on a $2.8 million contract to Bobby Petrino, who lost to Bama 49-14 but only has fraud charges pending. Texas covers 27 1/2.
Yes, Virginia, there is a Netherworld: The Cavaliers wanted Al Groh to bring the program to a new level, and he succeeded. They’re seven-point underdogs to Duke. Blue Devils win, but take Virginia and seven.
Bottom dollars Last week: 7-3 straight up, 6-4 against the line. Quarterly profit margins: 25-13 straight up, 18-19-1 against the line.
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