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Home > Jeff Schultz > Archives > 2008 > September > 11
Thursday, September 11, 2008
Predictions: Spurrier’s nothing to be paranoid about
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
According to legend, my favorite source, the term paranoia was first used in the late 1800s by the noted psychiatrist, Emil Kraepelin, who took note of his patients with delusional beliefs but no seeming deterioration in intellectual abilities.
It’s believed Kraepelin also recognized his own paranoia, because no matter how hard he tried, he became convinced that German chicks don’t dig the long-winded — and he kept losing debates to his biggest rival, Ludwig Von Spurrierhauser.
Which brings me to Saturday.
Kraepelin is so dead. Paranoia, not so much.
South Carolina stinks. Steve Spurrier has lost five straight SEC games. That includes two losses to Vanderbilt, which wouldn’t be so bad if we were comparing, like, libraries.
No wonder they’re all manic-depressive in Columbia. It’s bad enough having to live there.
But Georgia fans? They still have this thing about Spurrier. It dates to Florida. OK. And last year.
But has any nuisance of a rivalry ever looked so one-sided?
Spurrier can’t decide on a quarterback. Or a gameplan. Or a play. He has had one winning season since he left Florida seven years ago. No wonder out-of-state recruits laugh at him.
Georgia’s coach-quarterback-running-back trio of Mark Richt-Matthew Stafford-Knowshon Moreno ranks up there with any the program has ever had.
The line is seven. Am I missing something?
Separating fact from delusion: Dogs cover.
Keggers
• GaTech at VaTech: The Hokies lost to East Carolina, struggled offensively against Furman, lost four of their past five bowls games and are getting drilled by fans on the “Hokie Hotline” radio show. Frank Beamer’s response to one caller: “We’ve got good coaches, the players are going to get better and I think you’re out of whack.” At least now we know where DeAngelo Hall gets his thick skin from. Jackets lose but keep it close. Take the 6 1/2.
• Ohio State at The Real USC: Excuse the regional intrusion. Jim Tressel now says “Beanie” Wells is doubtful. Could be lying. Doesn’t matter. This team barely beat Ohio. Nobody can fake it that good. Trojans cover the 10 1/2.
• UAB at Tennessee: The Blazers have allowed 94 points in two games to Tulsa and Florida Atlantic. Fortunately, they take a step down this week. After the Vowels’ effort UCLA two weeks ago, I’m kinda liking the 30.
• Auburn at Missy State: Sylvester Croom won this game a year ago at Auburn, which pretty much made the Bulldogs’ season until the win over Alabama, which of course made everybody’s season. Well. He’ll always have the memories. Tigers cover 10 1/2.
Pros, Fantasy and Matt Cassel
• Falcons at Bucs: Jim Mora is the only Falcon head coach to win his first two games. Everything was great until the ammounium nitrate smoothies started to cloud his judgment. Mike Smith has the advantage of not being a nut job and will start the same QB (Matt Ryan) for the second game, which gives him an advantage over Jon Gruden, who has started seven QBs and exactly won zero playoff games since the Super Bowl in 2002. This week: Jeff Garcia is out; Brian Griese is in. Who’d a thunk this? Upset II forthcoming: Take the Birds and seven.
• Eagles at Cowboys: True story: Tony Romo won a game in Cleveland last week, then on his way home from the airport he stopped to help an elderly couple change a flat tire. Sure, he’s in great September. Dallas covers seven.
• Mushhead at Bengals: The good news is, Vince Young’s mom seems pretty tough. Bengals are awful but even they can’t botch this one.
• Patriots Lite at Jets: Gisele Bundchen said this week she has no intention of marrying Tom Brady, and I’m sure the timing is a complete coincidence. On a related note, she thinks Matt Cassel has a cute butt. Check? Going against the mock: Gimme the Pats and 1 1/2.
• Colts at Vikings: Peyton: The lesser Manning. Still, Indy covers the deuce.
• Niners at Seahawks: Alex Smith is out for the season. SanFran’s quarterback depth chart hasn’t looked this good since Montana was drafted. Seattle covers seven.
Who’s Counting?
• Last week: Never happened.
• Details, details: 6-5 straight up, 4-7 against the line.
• Bottom dollars: 10-7 straight up, 8-9 against the line.
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