Home > Jeff Schultz > Archives > 2008 > June > 10 > Entry
DEL.ICIO.USThe Tuesday Countdown
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
10: We start this week’s Countdown with something other than a laugh. Ken Stabler, the former NFL quarterback and Alabama icon, was arrested this past weekend for DUI and reckless driving. For those keeping score, this makes three DUIs since 1995. There comes a point in when even a loveable, drunk redneck from Alabama morphs into a pathetic loser. Stabler has blown past that point.
9: Not funny. Not cute. Did you read the story in Monday’s AJC about the creature, with multiple DUI convictions, who drove her pickup truck into a house in Powder Springs, killing a sleeping teenage boy? Before the Alabama courts do anything, they should make Stabler sit down with that boy’s parents and explain to them why he feels the need to get hammered before climbing behind the wheel.
8: Stabler does radio commentary on Alabama games. Or at least used to. Hopefully. Because if the school and its radio affiliate don’t fire Stabler, they’re either dumber or drunker than he is.
7: He is 62 going on 12. He was arrested for drunk driving in 2001 but pled to a slap on the wrist. He was arrested in 1995 and pled no contest. The man swims in whiskey. He’s proud of it. He once explained his divorces this way: “All I wanna do is drive around in my truck and drink Jack Daniels … and they just don’t understand.” Wrong, Dunderhead. It’s you who doesn’t get it.
6: Transition. The Chicago Bears released Cedric Benson after consecutive DUIs on water (boat) and land (car). Also not funny. But this is: In a statement after the driving DUI, Benson basically admitted guilt (“I apologize for making the poor decision to drink and drive …”) but suggested he would fight charges (“Though my local attorneys will continue to work hard to prove my innocence …”). Oy.
5: Hawks general manager Rick Sund has been on the job for two weeks and he still hasn’t made a decision on Mike Woodson - at least not publicly. Regardless of whether you think Woodson should be dumped or re-signed, is it right to keep somebody twisting in the wind for that long?
4: Ron Wilson, who lives in Hilton Head and knows Don Waddell from USA Hockey, showed little interest in the Thrashers job. What does that tell you?
3: The teams with the top three payrolls in baseball (Yankees, Mets, Tigers) have a combined record of 88-101. The teams with the bottom three payrolls (Marlins, Rays, A’s) are a combined 105-84.
2: What is it about hot Florida high school teachers having flings with 16-year-old students? And why was I born in California?
1: If it makes Chipper Jones feel any better, Ted Williams hit .406 in 1941, and the Boston Red Sox didn’t make the playoffs, either.
Comments
By polskidawg
June 10, 2008 11:36 AM | Link to this
4 - It tells me everything.By Roswell Ed
June 10, 2008 11:40 AM | Link to this
Mr Stabler how many fingers am I holding up.
Shleven occifer.
What is it about ex Alabama players and booze?
I heard that Joe Namath was so drunk once that he hit on Shelly Smith.
Maybe this is why Nick Saban can’t contol his players.
He tells them to follow in the footsteps of past bammers.
At least they won the national recruiting championship this year.
Some DA Bammer fan will now chime in about their 12 National Championships.
The two I’m most impressed with are the 1923 Better Homes and Gardens NC and the Good Housekeeping NC in 1932.
paROLE TIDE!!!!!!
By mart
June 10, 2008 11:40 AM | Link to this
Rick Sund has been on the job for only two weeks and he has yet to make the most significant decision he’ll make this year? I think it’s okay to keep someone “twisting in the wind” for that period of time under the circumstances.
By D-MAN
June 10, 2008 11:43 AM | Link to this
Your right on it Jeff. Ken Stabler needs to not only be fired from his post as a Alabama game commentator, he needs to serve some serious jail time for his repeat offenses with alcohol and driving…this man is obviously a time bomb waiting to go off…and before some of you say…”hey, 3 times in 10 yrs is not so bad…” Let me just say that ONCE is too much and it is enough to change a life or lives forever! Also, just think of all the times he drove drunk and never got caught. Wow…it boggles the mind. Somebody just needs to take his car/truck away from him…the police should at least take away his license. I think what speaks the most about this is his absolute disregard for his reponsiblity for NOT putting others in jeopardy with his drunk driving. I understand if he has a problem drinking, what I dont understand is why a man as smart as he is cant have plans made AHEAD of the drinking to have a safe way home that doesnt involve him behind the wheel of a vehicle??? Somebody please explain that one to me??
By Richard
June 10, 2008 11:47 AM | Link to this
Nothing about the 12 year old at the FSU game that got booed out of the stadium for stealing the ball from the FSU third baseman, and allowing Witchita to hit a home run on the next pitch?
By No Dawgs Here
June 10, 2008 12:22 PM | Link to this
yawn
In some countries second offense DUI’s are met with a firing squad. But, this is America, let’s let him go, give him some huge multi-million dollar TV contract and let him drink more. Isn’t that they way America is now? Or is that just the Hogan’s?
By Me
June 10, 2008 12:23 PM | Link to this
There were no playoffs in 1941. You won the pennant and went to the World Series or you went home.
By joe
June 10, 2008 12:50 PM | Link to this
Can someone please tell the Braves brass to make the following changes: 1. Cut Corkinhisa$$ Miller and bring up a young catcher from AAA who at least has a chance at hitting the Mendoza line 2. Make Kelly “there was a bug in my eye” Johnson catch 100 pop ups and write on the board 100 times I will catch every pop up from now on with 2 hands up and stop hot dogging them. 3. Send Mannny Acostmeanothergame back to AAA to find out why he keeps blowing leads. 4. Get Gonzo off his rehab stint in the minors and into our bullpen ASAP.
By Gary
June 10, 2008 12:50 PM | Link to this
Gee Jeff, I think Stabler’s DUI’s are troubling too but were things really so slow this week that you needed to use up four of your countdown slots for this? I’m with Richard in thinking there were some other interesting sports stories this week you could have shared your thoughts on.
By Gene
June 10, 2008 1:07 PM | Link to this
Stabler should be suspended from broadcasting the Alabama-Tulane game and the first quarter of the Western Kentucky game.
By College Sports Fan
June 10, 2008 1:37 PM | Link to this
Jeff, I thought you were some kind of media liberal dunderhead. The liberal dunderhead position is that alcoholism is a disease that needs to be treated.
I know, I know. But the Friends of Bill will tell you that the only way to overcome alcohol is to follow the 10 step program and attend the AA meetings. I agree with them on that.
Stabler has a problem, and so far it has not become anyone else’s problem. Hopefully he will wake up and join an AA group and get sober. An alcoholic is never cured, and remains in recovery for the rest of their life.
Alcohol and drug addictions are really sad for everyone and often have tragic consequences. It is nothing to be made fun of.
By MrWrestling#2
June 10, 2008 1:38 PM | Link to this
Maybe Stabler needs to join the movie group with Munson. That seems to keep Larry out of trouble.
By DrunkAgainstMadMothers
June 10, 2008 1:42 PM | Link to this
dui laws are ridiculous. harsher punishment than most drug laws. if bars have parking lots there will be drunks. leave the happy drunks alone. once you wreck then jail no dui for buzz driving. thats what happens when special interest groups pressure lawmakers.
By Ted Striker
June 10, 2008 2:09 PM | Link to this
Jeff, c’mon, buddy — Hot teachers don’t keep short-bus kids after school for private lessons
;)
By WGJ
June 10, 2008 2:46 PM | Link to this
Born in California….that speaks volumes.
By Odell
June 10, 2008 2:49 PM | Link to this
Richt’s counseling sessions worked for me.
By khao$
June 10, 2008 2:54 PM | Link to this
Hey Mr. Sund, If you need help with this decision, I’ll help you out with it…fire Woody!
By James Adams
June 10, 2008 3:25 PM | Link to this
A real man knows how to drive drunk without causing trouble. The real problem behind the tragedy of the 12 year old? Women driving. Lets also throw in women and anyone under 25 being able to vote. Now THOSE are issues I can get behind!!!
By Rusty From Belwood
June 10, 2008 3:29 PM | Link to this
Take it easy on ole Snake. Remember, Jeff, when you wake up in the morning you will still be in Atlanta. Roll Tide.
By joe b
June 10, 2008 4:21 PM | Link to this
At least Namath and Stabler played in the 1960’s for a coach that has been dead for 25 years. Odel (Dunderhead) Thurman played for Saint Richt just a few year ago. You Dawg fans need to get your head out of your behind and look at your own players. But that would would require inteligence.
By Ted Striker
June 10, 2008 4:37 PM | Link to this
Hey, Joe b - what exactly is “inteligence” ?
Is that like being a double naught spy for “British Inteligence”?
By joe b
June 10, 2008 4:49 PM | Link to this
Ted Striker Intellegence is what Quincy Cartey used to figure out how much a oz of dope was worth.
By Ted Striker
June 10, 2008 4:58 PM | Link to this
Hmmmm…Quincy Cartey, Quincy Cartey — is Quincey Cartey the medical examiner in California?
I don’t find any record of a Quincey Cartey in UGA records.
Other than the fact that you don’t “spel” too good, can you add something meaningful?
I didn’t think so
By HomeDawg
June 10, 2008 5:22 PM | Link to this
I think Joe B took a hit in the head at Macho Grande. Thanks.
By leland
June 10, 2008 6:09 PM | Link to this
Dear Jeb—right on about dui. Me, I hate colon cancer also. Gangrene, clap? Same thing. Trench mouth? There’s no end to it. They should send Stabler to California for a month or so where he can learn how to do right. Your pal, Leland
By Geno
June 10, 2008 8:57 PM | Link to this
C’mon dawg fans what’s wrong you jealous .That’s just Kenny being Kenny.Bama athletics used the Snake to get through tough times now that Saban is on board they want to can him.I’ll bet most of you Georgia rednecks have driven while intoxicated so quit being a hippocrit.Kenny and Eli are great together calling games.I say let’s keep it that way.
Roll Tide and Cheers
By rolltideface
June 11, 2008 12:49 AM | Link to this
Show of hands, who here would love to read about Mr. Schultz getting a DUI? I would love it. I had the pleasure of meeting Jeff at Flowery Branch a few years back and he is every bit the jackass that he comes across as being. He’s the Kenny Mayne of the AJC- minus the humor. Completely worthless.
By Masovitch
June 11, 2008 1:03 AM | Link to this
College Sports Fan
It’s a 12 step program, not 10.
By Ted Striker
June 11, 2008 2:23 AM | Link to this
Hey, “rolltideface” — I’m not at all in favor of anyone getting a DUI — Jeff Shultz included.
Although the disappointment would be slightly mitigated if I learned he’d parked a Buick on you and your 10 cent opinion
By Titothebear
June 11, 2008 8:14 AM | Link to this
Ted Striker,
Do us all a favor and shut your cakehole, you annoying @$$clown!
By Barack Hussein Obama = CUBS FAN
June 11, 2008 9:30 AM | Link to this
President Barack Hussein Obama (Cubs Fan):
http://www.eyeblast.tv/public/video.aspx?RsrcID=2036
By The Bear
June 11, 2008 10:35 AM | Link to this
This was the most boring read of all time. Was Jeff drunk when he wrote this piece of garbage? I wish the AJC would revoke Jeff’s right to write columns. Maybe Jeff could write after school specials for the Lifetime network about the hazzards of drunk driving. Next week, why doesn’t Jeff give us a film review of the Sex in the City movie. I am sure he would know more about Kristen Davis’ lingerie choices than anything about sports.
By BONE T
June 11, 2008 11:54 AM | Link to this
YOU HATERS JUST WAIT!!!! THE FIRST THING PRESIDENT OBAMA GOING TO DO IS FREE MIKE VICK!!!! AND YOU SORRY WHITE PEOPLE CANT DO NOTHING ABOUT IT!!!! NONE YALL!!!!!
By Gary
June 11, 2008 2:14 PM | Link to this
Dwane Casey, Flip Saunders, Doug Collins, Mike Woodson. Whose fourth in that group?
Just a little test to help Sund make up his mind.
By hop
June 11, 2008 2:35 PM | Link to this
DUI IS NOT A FUNNY SUBJECT AND THE LAWS ARE NOT TOUGH ENOUGH ESPECIALLY WHEN INNOCENT people ARE BEING KILLED ON THE ROADS ON A DAILY BASIS.
I DON’T CARE WHO GETS CAUGHT WITH DUI; THEY SHOULD NEVER BE ALLOWED TO DRIVE AGAIN UNTIL THEY LEARN NOT TO DRIVE WHEN THEY ARE DRINKING.
THERE ARE MANY PEOPLE WHO HAVE SUCCESSFULLY OVERCOME THE ADDICTION OF DRUGS AND alchol.
By JSS
June 11, 2008 2:38 PM | Link to this
Why do you idiots keep calling that NO TALENT HACK a liberal? Note to you right wing nut jobs, stupidity knows no ideology!!!
Odell Thurman (fill in the blank) Joe Hamilton (fill in the blank) Glenn Richardson (fill in the blank) Casey Cagle (fill in the blank) Chris Spiezo (fill in the blank) Kyle Busch (fill in the blank) Jason Schafer (fill in the blank) Roswell Ed (fill in the blank) on and on…
By Rodney King
June 11, 2008 5:15 PM | Link to this
Can’t we all just get along?
Go dawgs!
By Kelley
June 11, 2008 7:27 PM | Link to this
Just read that Jurrgens twisted his ankle walking down the stairs from the dugout last night and will miss tongiht’s start.
If it wasn’t so horrifying it would be comical. The visual picture I now have of the Braves is the war scene from Gone With the Wind of miles and miles of injuried soldiers, that’s all I can picture when I think of them.
What’s next? Hudson hurts his back tying his shoes?
By wheremydoo ragat
June 12, 2008 9:43 AM | Link to this
Yeah, Stabler f’ed up. And for the 3rd time. I think UA should support him by getting him help in a rehab somewhere and definitely take him off the Air. I think Eli Gold and Jay Barker would make a wonderful tandem for UA football radio.
You barners keep on makin’ fun. Ol’ St. Nick will be bringing a bag of goodies down our chimney soon. Regardless of how many great yesteryear QB’s end up publicly sauced and humiliated. That was history - i’m lookin’ ahead.
By Dana
June 12, 2008 10:36 AM | Link to this
A Bama fan “lookin’ ahead” instead of living in the past? Next thing you know they’ll actually discover Sasquatch.
By College Sports Fan
June 12, 2008 5:14 PM | Link to this
Masovitch, you are indeed correct. It is a 12 step program; not the 10 I typed. Sometimes when I type too fast, my fingers and brain do not sync up.
By bama_12titles
June 12, 2008 6:49 PM | Link to this
So Kenny Stabler gets a 3rd DUI. Big freaking deal! Yawn! The only reason Schultz writes about this is because he will do anything to get down on Bama. Its just part of that little guy mentality that Georgia people have when they think about Bama. They just can’t get over the fact that Bama was, is, and always will be the big name in southern football while UGA is just another johnny come lately with a good 2 year run every long once in awhile. It just eats at your craw that this supposedly redneck state(as if Georgia isn’t full of rednecks)has always been the big time program with the 12 national titles and the 21 SEC titles. It must suck having lived in the shadow of the rednecks to the west for the last 120 years of college football and you still resent it even when you finally have that once in 25 years shot at a national title. You are a gnat on the butt of those big, bad crimson elephants. It is what it is you p**!
By Ted Striker
June 12, 2008 9:04 PM | Link to this
“TitoTheBear” — Go play with your “cub”
By Titothebear
June 12, 2008 11:04 PM | Link to this
Ted Striker,
Snappy comeback! BTW, I don’t think saying “cub” is making Braves fans feel too good right now…poor choice of words, don’t you think? Oops, I forgot, you don’t!