Opinion Talk

By College student

May 16, 2008 8:00 AM | Link to this

You can’t have it both ways. If you encourage your child to do extremely well in school, and make that a priority, then they will not learn practical skills at the same age as you did. But one should not expect that these kids will never learn it; it will just come much later due to an increased pressure towards more theoretical goals rather than the practical.

Video games and TV, often the culprits of parental groups, are absolutely irrelevant to this conversation. The presence and use of electronics in one’s home is entirely controllable. Parents who can’t control their children’s video game playing or TV watching or IMing don’t realize that all of these problems are fixated around objects which they control, and can take away or give at their whim. So instead of blaming the content, an intelligent and disciplined parent can be a powerful tool in the structuring of entertainment in a young child’s life.

By Craig

May 16, 2008 8:20 AM | Link to this

Granted, “…an intelligent and disciplined parent can be a powerful tool in the structuring of entertainment in a young child’s life,” but children at all ages are subjected to influences outside the knowledge and control of parents. Certainly, the primary responsibility for and control over how our kids turn out should lie with their parents, but the day care center, the school, friends, the “Jones” next door and numerous other social exert tremendous influences of which the parent is ignorant, if not power-lacking. It takes a community, headed by knowledgeable and responsible parents, to rear a child. Now, what about rearing kids who don’t have a Daddy- a group increasing as a consequence of a annual b******* rate of 40% in our state?

By jet lag

May 16, 2008 8:32 AM | Link to this

The alternative to Idle Children is Hitler Youth. When Bush was reading “Mein Pet Kampf” on 911 to an assembly of Hitler Youth, it was a snapshot of the death of an era: Conservatism. While Senator Craig was sounding taps, (with his flag at half mast), our children were leading the revolution of the new age. This new socio-political rebellion is not about sex, drugs, and rock’n’roll, but rather it is about Cause itself, that is, what would motivate war?

Two buildings collapsed in the eye of the perfect storm of history, religion, and politics, (but then I repeat myself), and in that moment our children were slapped alive. They had seen all they needed to see in order to judge their parents and the world into which they were born.

Irony rules the universe, and that’s why it’s such a surprise to realize that Bush gave all the right orders to capture and destroy the enemy after 911. Bush failed because his General mutinied. Rumsfeld would not send his army under CIA direction. He refused to budge for ten solid weeks while the enemy found the resources to survive. The opportunity for total victory slipped away. The aftermath of this 23-point criteria match for treason sees the enemy remaining strong, and capable of a new offensive.

Our children are now faced with premature death, both financial and literal, because of the corrupt and fumbling efforts of their parents.

The best example of what is wrong with us is found in any lottery. Someone wins 237 million dollars. Why not 237 people win one million? That would be just as spectacular, and draw just as much interest. We are set up to worship and protect some arbitrary standard of life called the American Dream.

The American Dream is ridiculous. If we all made a million dollars this year, that would amount to 300 trillion dollars. There’s not that much money in the ironic universe.

ET went home because earth stinks as an ATM. The earth stinks anyway, with or without ET’s opinion. The Iraq war stinks too. So does foreign policy directed by foreigners, which is how we got into Iraq, but that’s another thing we fumbled for our children.

But mostly, we stink. Our children may love us, but they wont ignore our faults. Expect a real heart to heart out of the mouths of babes.

By MADMOMMY

May 16, 2008 8:35 AM | Link to this

Ok, first look at how much “stuff” kids today have. I mean we had TV, which at that time most households only had one, maybe two if you were lucky so you really weren’t allowed to watch much TV to begin with. Then we were always outside. My bike was they we all got around our town and back and forth to friends houses. Now kids have to be driven everywhere and they really don’t have much of a life playing outside. I have yet to stop my car to pause a street game of baseball, soccer or football when that was the norm when I was a kid.

We also as kids didn’t have many of the conveinces that kids today have. How many of us remember using the dewy decimal system? Card catalouge? Kids today just don’t have to “think” about the information they are obtaining and thus creates the problem of trying to use other forms of information. It all goes to the thought process and learning the steps to think things through and process the information that kids today aren’t really grasping.

With all that said, this is why I hope that my children will learn a healthy balance between “stuff”, learning and how to have some sort of balance. It is tough to do and I admit that I have a hard time of it myself, but that doesn’t mean that I am going to give up and toss in the towel just yet.

By js

May 16, 2008 8:42 AM | Link to this

Our children are our future and how we handle them when they are young are the most important years. We are forming who they will be.

Sadly, children are being taken away from their parents and thrown into an overcrowded foster care system Judge john sumner in Cherokee County ga removes children from their parents and loves the power that allows him to do that. He damages the children at a young age, so that they are back before him as deliquent. I guess it is job security for him, but it is not what is in the best interest of the children,or Society

By Louis

May 16, 2008 8:56 AM | Link to this

This is what happens when you let rap music and Col. Sanders raise your kidz:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5eXNClwV5AM

By Matt

May 16, 2008 8:57 AM | Link to this

This will forver be a problem until parents realize they are messing up.
Everyone points the finger at somebody else’s kid when your kid is the jerk. I truly try to take honest assessments of my parenting. I realized that I use the tv as a babysitter, so I limit how much my kids watch it. My son loves video games, and it keeps him quiet BUT I have to go in and cut the game off. I love to give my kids whatever they want BUT I stop myself and I don’t- even if I know it will make them happy. I am not raising my kids to be useless, brilliant but stupid people. Being a teacher has helped me see the consequences of that.

By Mike

May 16, 2008 9:27 AM | Link to this

The kids in school today may have been exposed to more information than my generation (boomer), but they know less.

We took PhysEd out of school (to save money), so we have fat kids.

We’ve dumbed down the average school so more will graduate (quota).

Yes, we still have the accelerated programs for the really smart students, and yes we still have the track teams and football teams etc… but the average student doesn’t exercise anything but their thumbs. They aren’t challenged in class by their teacher, because the teacher is a burnout with tenure.

Disciplining a student have become a legal challenge, for teachers and for parents. The little darling can sue their parents, or go live with Dad.

We went to this touchie/feelgood type nurturing, so now we have a generation who’s first taste of failure will be to be rejected by their chosen college.

Exactly what did you expect?

By hopeful

May 16, 2008 10:30 AM | Link to this

As time ticks, civilizations have necessarily grown and advanced and adapted to change, for the good we pray, with more work ahead, forever. People are still people, nature is still nature, technology still moves at rapid speed. We must adapt but wisely choose what works as a benefit to our lives but with special concern now for the good of nature and each other. We are all too aware now that so much growth and advancement has not been entirely nurturing to our land and its people. We have but one earth. Children need be a part of the big picture, in a positive way, at home and at school and throughout the community, for what matters now and for the future, to work at preserving what links exist between all people, the world, this grand earth. Whether tv or computer, these can be educational tools. If these tools do not exist, do not waste the opportunity to read and/or talk sensibly with your children and find ways to communicate and understand one another….I believe the PARENT plays the most responsible role in making the child useless or useful. The PARENT has been unfortunately blocking school authority from necessary discipline for bad behavior. Parents and adults all over the world set examples that make huge differences. We should be pleased with ourselves and our decisions as children are watching and listening and learning as they grow.

Adults and companies large and small with the capacity, resources and willingness to set up observations and or learning sessions for young people during seasons when schools are closed, for a low cost and not for profit (to help struggling parents) could begin and continue to play a great role in the future and be a smart avenue to redirect young idle minds and help show the way to becoming more USEFUL.

By Pat

May 16, 2008 10:35 AM | Link to this

I thought the kids were raising the parents.

By Fulton

May 16, 2008 10:36 AM | Link to this

As far as I’m concerned, the battle was lost the moment we took discipline out of the school system. Period! No two ways about it. And we have the genius that came up with ‘time out’, etc. to thank for it. If I can’t spank my kid now, the police will put a bullet in him later. Where’s the logic in THAT system? Our kids are exposed to more, yet have absorbed less and you wonder why?

By still hopeful

May 16, 2008 10:46 AM | Link to this

Irresponsible adults foster useless children.

Why does a child learn it’s OK to be inconsiderate? Why does a child learn it’s OK to threaten another child? Why does a child learn it’s OK to steal? Why does a child learn it’s OK to step on a spider or hurt an animal? Why does a child learn it’s OK to throw trash on the ground?

The USEFUL have much rewarding work ahead.

By RealityKing

May 16, 2008 11:00 AM | Link to this

THEIR NOT USELESS KIDS!!

Their progressive kids. And that’s the reason my kids will go to private schools..

By gafarmer

May 16, 2008 11:01 AM | Link to this

In answer to your question some have and some always will raise useless kids. Part of any good education is experiencing fatigue brought on by hard work, not sports activity.

Parents sending young men and women to college with a blank check instead of a requirement for part time employment are doing our next generation a disservice.

By blame the parents

May 16, 2008 11:06 AM | Link to this

It’s not the kids in most cases; it is the parents. The parents who lead their precious snowflakes to believe that they can do no wrong and all problems are the result of others.

Parents who demand better grades even though their children have not earned them.

Parents who refuse to let their child drink from the educating waters of consequences, while force feeding them the junk food of entitlement.

Parents who want to be friends instead of Parents and who give all to children who have earned nothing.

Do not blame the children. They are being led astray by their parents. So it’s a delicious irony that once the crushing reality of the real world weighs upon these children, they have to run back to their parents for they are not capable of dealing with it on their own.

By still hopeful

May 16, 2008 11:18 AM | Link to this

If you believe that progressive and useless mean the same…please explain. We do not understand. What does private vs. public school have to do with anything. It takes a lot of money to attend private…..something else for a child take for granted.

By BeeJay

May 16, 2008 11:33 AM | Link to this

Some of the responses are alarmingly polar, with no room for all those gray areas that are responsible for “useless kids.”

One person says, “You can’t have it both ways” - educated AND useful kids. I emphatically disagree. A generation ago, two generations ago, how far back, we were raising educated and useful kids. The biggest problem with “you can’t have it both ways” is we don’t seem to have it EITHER way - the kids aren’t useful and they aren’t terribly educated either.

Another poster says “The alternative to Idle Children is Hitler Youth.” This extremism almost doesn’t deserve mention. If you think there is nothing in between “idle” and “Hitler youth,” you are the worst pessimist and moreover you are wrong. Such extreme responses aren’t helpful, or accurate.

Yet another says, “THEIR NOT USELESS KIDS!! Their progressive kids. And that’s the reason my kids will go to private schools..” One hopes that the kids’ private school will teach them better spelling or word use than this parent displays. And again, useful doesn’t equal whatever she thinks the opposite of progressive is, nor does progressiveness assume idleness. However, if this parent’s belief is that her kid can be idle as long as he or she is “progressive,” her kids will not be able to cope with life, and if many other parents think the same, the country is in bigger trouble than we already are.

There is nothing wrong with expecting kids to be “useful” in ways concommitant with their age and ability. In fact, there is a lot wrong with NOT expecting them to be useful. Many parents are leaning over backwards to make sure their children have everything they want, will not suffer any embarrassment of peer pressure, and God forbid doesn’t have to DO anything they don’t want to. This kind of life collides with reality. I feel sorry for the snotty kids who wouldn’t know personal responsibility if it jumped up and bit them in the butt, and one day it will.

By swolf4810

May 16, 2008 11:47 AM | Link to this

The fact that we’re raising “educated idiots” with no common sense, no manners, and absolutely NO work ethic shouldn’t come as a surprise to anyone. For the last 20 years or more all rules have applied only to ‘other kids’ and not “my little darlings.”

By map3s

May 16, 2008 11:56 AM | Link to this

Adults teach children how to be adults. If our children grow up to be useless adults, it’s because they have modeled our behavior.

By phyllis

May 16, 2008 12:24 PM | Link to this

I work in the public school system. Every Monday I ask my students what they did over the weekend. Never do they say they played outside with friends, rode their bikes, climbed a tree, built a fort, or did anything that requires imagination and creativity. Nor do they ever say they had chores to do or any kind of responsibility to their families. I get so BORED with the responses of “I played a new video game my mom bought for me”, “I went to Wal-Mart”, “I didn’t do anything” that how can these children not be bored themselves. God forbid any of them should pick up a book to read, play a board game with the family, write a letter to a grandparent, or any of the things that were “normal” in my family when I was growing up. If a child never gets to develop an imagination, he won’t have an imagination. If children don’t have chores to do (age appropriate)then they won’t develop a work ethic and feel the pride of a job well done. If everything is handed to them without ever having to earn things, then “grown up” life will be very difficult for them.

By HARRY

May 16, 2008 12:41 PM | Link to this

Our kids education is up to us. Sit down and check that homework. Read to your kids. Have them read to you. Don’t sit them in front of a TV as a baby sitter. Go to the library with them. My kid is in his second year of Latin and he’s 8. Chart the course for them to success. They will pick it up when they are ready.

By GW

May 16, 2008 12:50 PM | Link to this

It is sad that parents think they are doing their kids a favor by helping them dodge responsibility. When mom and dad are gone, or broke, the kid won’t make it.

By RealityKing

May 16, 2008 1:22 PM | Link to this

Disiciple.

Disiciple from parents, teachers and society. Aren’t we getting back from our kids exactly what we have been expecting from them??

My neighbor is looking to home school their children. They have to sign a legal agreement with the county that they will give their children 4 hrs of educational direction per day.

4 hrs!? What’s up with that!!??

By GaLiberal

May 16, 2008 2:17 PM | Link to this

This is the continual mantra of relioNazis and the neo-cons who want to control peoples lives. Watching too much tv or texting or playing video games is NOT the problem. Neither are “overly permissive” parents (whatever that means). The problem is the above groups MAKING IT A PROBLEM. They manufacture facts out of thin air or anecdotal information and repeat them over and over until they become ingrained. So now people believe kids are lazy; just like when I was a kid.

This is exactly what MADD did to get draconian laws on drunk driving passed. They wanted to show a significant increase in drunk driving wrecks and deaths when 18 yos were allowed to buy beer. So they defined ‘alcohol related’ to mean anyone involved in a wreck or death who had consumed even a drop of alcohol within the past eight hours. So if you were rear-ended by someone who hadn’t had a drop of alcohol their entire life, but your passenger had a glass of wine with dinner, that was now an alcohol related collision. If you or your passenger broke a fingernail, that was an alcohol related injury. If someone died due to a heart attack or other unrelated cause that was counted as an alcohol related death. So one wreck could be counted three or more times. Just to pad the stats. Now 18 yos can die in Bush’s reckless and unnecessary Iraq war, but can’t buy a beer.

When you vote Rethuglicon, you vote against your own best interests. And blaming the childern or the parents is living proof.

By Duluth

May 16, 2008 2:39 PM | Link to this

What our kids really need is their parents and adult interaction. Buying them video games, and everything they want, makes the parent feel as though they are doing right by their kid. The kid has everything, but wants the parent more than the video game.

Kids scream for boundries. They need love and attention and OUR TIME. We only have them for a short time, before we release them into society.

It is our job as parents to guide our kids through life, to give them the skills to make the right decisions when they leave our homes.

I am a single parent to one child. I put my dating life on hold in order to raise a productive member of society and to be there for her. Her father bailed on us, therefore it is up to me to be there for her when she needs me. She knows I am there whenever she needs a parent. I’m home every night with her and we are very close.

Video games, tv, the neighbors and computers are not raising my child. I am!!!! And I love every minute of it and wouldn’t change a thing.

Parents - give your kids yourself. Give them your time. Show them they are important and that they are loved. Hug them often, and always, ALWAYS say I love you (they really want to hear it). I tell my daughter I love her many times a day, and I get it back ten-fold.

By New York City

May 16, 2008 2:57 PM | Link to this

My kids are not useless, but yours are.

By Mike

May 16, 2008 3:20 PM | Link to this

As we get ready for a mass retirement of Boomers, I suppose that I should consider myself lucky that I’ve got twenty-five more years of a good career, and most of the people coming up aren’t intelligent enough to steal my job or push me out until I’m good and ready to go.

By RenaP

May 16, 2008 3:28 PM | Link to this

I think a huge problem today is women have kids and they’re back in work in 6 weeks. Some of them don’t even need to do it financially but they don’t want to give up their careers for their children. Then they have another and another. I don’t understand why people want to have all these kids and then put it in someone elses hands to raise while they go and pursue their careers.

They should do themselves a favor. Have one child and take off from work for 3 or 4 years. Don’t send the kid to childcare programs 10 hours a day from the time they are a month or so. Instead of looking at quantity, look at quality.

By Unhugged

May 16, 2008 4:00 PM | Link to this

Well, Duluth, I think, alas, you & I must agree to disagree. No one EVER hugged or kissed me when I was growing up, or said “I love you”. I was raised with discipline & expected to toe the line. I grew up to actually be a responsible, gainfully employed individual without an entitlement complex. Nowadays I see parents all lovey-dovey & touchy-feely with their children & then they wonder why Junior is so spoiled & demanding & then, when he’s a teen, they are totally baffled when he drops out of school to pursue a life of crime

By Dick

May 16, 2008 4:01 PM | Link to this

Parents are not necessarilty raising children who are worthless. Our government is causing kids to be raised worthless. Our government is teaching them don’t worry, you will be gaken care of from cradle to grave, just pay us back by voting democrat. Have all kids you want out of wed lock, don’t work, get welfare.

By Dick

May 16, 2008 4:02 PM | Link to this

Parents are not necessarilty raising children who are worthless. Our government is causing kids to be raised worthless. Our government is teaching them don’t worry, you will be gaken care of from cradle to grave, just pay us back by voting democrat. Have all kids you want out of wed lock, don’t work, get welfare.

By HeySoose

May 16, 2008 4:14 PM | Link to this

jetlag exhibits all the qualities we do not want our children to have. The first being blaming others when life isn’t fair. Must be a sad life still living in your parents basement.

By RenaP

May 16, 2008 4:31 PM | Link to this

wow Dick. Your name says it all.

By fer

May 16, 2008 6:13 PM | Link to this

What amazes me is the parents who don’t require their children to do chores and help w/ things around the house. I’m happy to say that my grandchildren, young as they are, are already being taught to help by doing things such as taking the clothes out of the dryer, putting the dogfood in the dog’s dish, etc. They will grow up knowing they can do things instead of having to feel helpless or feeling that they are too special to have to do anything for themselves.

By Josh

June 9, 2008 1:51 AM | Link to this

If you want your children to be hard workers then teach them to work for a noble cause. Fact is most of our “hard work” now gets us things like pollution and new fancy suits. Humans have become a disease upon this earth. We are killing it at a rapid rate. We have politicians who could care less about real issues, only elections. WE HAVE A DEATH PENALTY and then say it is illegal to kill. Some still believe it is wrong to eat with you elbows on the table. Oh aren’t we so refined. Come on what is the logic in that. That is a positioning tool from the past. A class notification. The youth is intelligent and not as systemized as most. Sometimes I think for all our years and all of our avenues of intelligence, we as adults are the children. How many cars do you have. How many times have you cheated on your spouse. Do you still believe in a book that was written thousands of years ago by a man you do not know personally. Most of us are lazy and inconsiderate our whole lives and do not even realize it because society says it is normal. Pawns we are. Not selling Big Macs whole heartedly gives people more time to examine the true nature of life. To avoid the problems of the past. I say sit, think, react when life calls you. Who knows maybe if our children aren’t out for money, we may actually have a political system which doesn’t allow such an incompetent man to lead us in the future. Or maybe we might one day realize that countries having militaries is really no different than the gangs of inner cities. Funny how we are officially at war with them though. We as humans have alot to recover from and alot to learn. Teach you children to be kind, to make decisions for them selves, to take no ones word unless they have established a concrete long term relationship with them, to question things that feel instinctually wrong, and most importantly to not put so much emphasis on MONEY.

By Josh

June 9, 2008 1:52 AM | Link to this

If you want your children to be hard workers then teach them to work for a noble cause. Fact is most of our “hard work” now gets us things like pollution and new fancy suits. Humans have become a disease upon this earth. We are killing it at a rapid rate. We have politicians who could care less about real issues, only elections. WE HAVE A DEATH PENALTY and then say it is illegal to kill. Some still believe it is wrong to eat with you elbows on the table. Oh aren’t we so refined. Come on what is the logic in that. That is a positioning tool from the past. A class notification. The youth is intelligent and not as systemized as most. Sometimes I think for all our years and all of our avenues of intelligence, we as adults are the children. How many cars do you have. How many times have you cheated on your spouse. Do you still believe in a book that was written thousands of years ago by a man you do not know personally. Most of us are lazy and inconsiderate our whole lives and do not even realize it because society says it is normal. Pawns we are. Not selling Big Macs whole heartedly gives people more time to examine the true nature of life. To avoid the problems of the past. I say sit, think, react when life calls you. Who knows maybe if our children aren’t out for money, we may actually have a political system which doesn’t allow such an incompetent man to lead us in the future. Or maybe we might one day realize that countries having militaries is really no different than the gangs of inner cities. Funny how we are officially at war with them though. We as humans have alot to recover from and alot to learn. Teach you children to be kind, to make decisions for them selves, to take no ones word unless they have established a concrete long term relationship with them, to question things that feel instinctually wrong, and most importantly to not put so much emphasis on MONEY.

By Donewithit

September 11, 2008 12:03 AM | Link to this

Here I have been reading who is at fault, why parents are to blame or not. Why video games and T.V. are not the problem. Give me a break! All of these factors have a bit of resposibility but we have been putting less and less of it on the actual children themselves. Yes they are just kids, ones who take no responsibilty for themselves, take things given to them for granted, and have no respect for most anyone including themselves. Teachers and parents take a huge brunt of this impact but are given no power to do anything about it. If teachers in schools are said to need to take on more responsiblity for test results and such, I swear they may as well just do the work for the students. We want them to have everything but are making it all mean nothing. At this point I cheer whenever I see any parent brave enough to discipline their child in public.