Coming back for more…
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
Day 1 of “Misadventures” blog-dom down. I’m hoping this doesn’t develop into bad boy syndrome: “Treat me like trash and I’ll keep coming back.” (Luckily, that’s never been my style…yet.)
My peers didn’t lie: you all definitely keep it real. Luckily, I respect that in a person, or in this case, a group.
Couple lessons learned from first day:
- Foots: Agreed; I should Never, EVER leave the office while the blog is bumping. Unfortunately, I was called out on an assignment beyond my control. Will be better!
- To MyTwoCents: I’ve got 10 years before I should be jaded? You’re either right or I’ve done a lot of living…perhaps over time this blog will explain why.
- To The Truth: Sorry about the bowl; not sorry you didn’t get your “dude” moderator. You’ll have to settle for me and my ruminations about the male species instead! That said, I agree that having a male or gay perspective would be interesting. (Should we come up with male names that end in “a”?)
- Amazon Red: Do you think you’ve missed the boat on some possibly good relationships for cutting them off too soon?
- To Beautiful: Not sure of my “favorites” quite yet; it will be from whom I learn the most!
Some of you noted that you’re tired of the same topics, but don’t all of us experience many of the same things? Don’t you think that while we each have our own personalities, dating habits are fairly common among us?
And to my blog title, what keeps you coming back for more with the wrong person? Is it just hot sex? A feeling you’ve “won” something each time you get them back? Or an addiction to drama?
We’re just getting to know eachother; consider this week’s blogs foreplay.
Permalink | Comments (293) | Post your comment | Categories: Mix & Mingle
Introducing Blanca: Red-flag warning system?
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
I’m channeling Charlotte York for my first “Misadventures” blog: “I’ve been dating since I was 15. I’m exhausted! Where is he?”
That’s how I come you; a tired, weary, yet hopeful 20-something woman still looking for “The One.”
I was at first hesitant to blog about my dating experiences, which have run the gamut from wonderful to hilarious to heart-breaking to downright bizarre. (Sorry, Mom, about that one time…) But then I realized: if I haven’t gotten a real relationship out of most of these experiences, I should at least get some advice.
It seems the more I date, the less I know, and that’s where you all come in. I’m hoping you can give me the wisdom I’ll surely need as I continue on the quest for the proverbial true love. And when all else fails, perhaps you can share a laugh with me over some of my foibles.
Like this one…
My fourth date with “Jeremy” ended with the 31-year-old man in fetal position on my living room floor, wailing at the top of his lungs. And for better or worse, he wasn’t even crying because I told him it wasn’t working out.
I should’ve acknowledged the red flag he threw my way the date prior: “My parents are terrible people.”
Yikes.
Had we not already scheduled the fourth date, I probably wouldn’t have seen him again. Sure, some people do indeed have awful parents, but I was weirded out by his blanket statement. (And other factors, like his claim about his altered brain chemistry.) Fast forward to the final date, when he wanted to talk about his childhood…ending in WailFest 2008. (I’m sure my neighbors thought I was engaging in some twisted ritual.)
I believe we all have “red-flag warning systems,” but I didn’t heed mine. Prior to the terrible parents comment, he was hilarious, smart, engaging and kept me on my toes. Even though I had a bad feeling about the family situation, I kept the date. Luckily, he left my house transgressing on nothing more than my tear-soaked rug.
What do you think about my “red flag” theory? Are there times you had a gut feeling you ignored, and later regretted?
Permalink | Comments (311) | Post your comment | Categories: Dating
Breaking up with a psycho
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
It seems to be an all too familiar tragedy we see in the news. Woman leaves man, man attacks, kills, or disfigures the woman. The saying, hell has no fury like a woman scorned, certainly rings true when an ex-girlfriend or betrayed woman goes on a rampage to exact revenge. What causes people to detach from reality like this?
What do you think is the best way to break up with someone who has shown to be “unstable” or aggressive? Have you ever dated someone who didn’t handle your break up too well?
Breakups should be handled with extreme care when you aren’t sure how they are going to react. What would you put in a breakup guide to minimize the trauma?
Permalink | Comments (212) | Categories: Breakups
The Future Freaks Me Out
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
Thanks to the wonders of modern technology, I was watching the band Motion City Soundtrack perform a show live on the internet recently.
One of my favorite songs is The Future Freaks Me Out:
From an era we hate to admit we embrace
We fail to represent
We fail to be content
We fail at everything we ever even try to attempt
And so the story goes
As only Betty knows
It’s time to take control
Every time another birthday rolls around, I get all contemplative and introspective about my life. This year, I was in the midst of clashing with a certain gentleman who turned out to NOT be a good match for me. As we were mid-argument, I thought to myself, “Why do I bother with this?” I mean at that moment, I had no idea why I was expending energy on dating!
Earlier that day, I was wondering what my next move should be in life. Husband and children are still in the optional category. Happiness and personal fulfillment? Still considered mandatory! I won’t trade it in to have a marriage and children because I don’t think I should have to!
Do you guys ever get freaked out about your future? Does it ever affect how you handle relationships? Do you think that responsibility, expectations, and obligations prevent a lot of us from attempting to grow up? Do you think we fail at being content, as the song says?
I think it is time to draft a single girl manifesto to remind me about my personal goals, intentions and principles. What do you think you would put in your own manifesto?
Permalink | Comments (309) | Post your comment | Categories: Family
The Little Black(Berry) Book
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
Recently, I was talking to friends about former playboys who finally marry after years of playing the field and breaking hearts. I started to think about the men that I know who used to enjoy their bachelorhood so much. When they decided to settle down and turn in their little black book, I wonder how they handled the “sacrifice” of other women.
I think women probably have similar adjustments to make when they decide to forsake all others too. I know it seems that all women are ready to dash down the aisle, but even if that were true, we still have to come to terms with letting go of the single life.
So how do you know that the time is right to retire your little black book? Maybe it would be easier to outline when it is NOT the right time:
Permalink | Comments (257) | Post your comment | Categories: Relationships
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melo Newfangled folks call revelations, AHA Moments, if that works better for you. Something finally clicks in you and you understand clearly. You can get that through your own experiences, bumps and bruises and all,... read the full comment by Foots (aka Poots until 9PM) | Comment on Coming back for more... Read Coming back for more...
Good night everyone. Be sober be viligant and resist the devour! (**Cemeeli) Stay watchful!... read the full comment by SexyLeggs | Comment on Coming back for more... Read Coming back for more...
Tazzee LOL!! No, what’s BAD is when you have a HEAVY one yourself, you know, the ones that like to hang around you and get trapped in your clothes. You can’t fan those away, they are stuck with you for the next three minutes,... read the full comment by Foots (aka Poots until 9PM) | Comment on Coming back for more... Read Coming back for more...
WHY DO FARTS SMELL WORSE IN THE SHOWER OR TUB? only urs do….... read the full comment by The Melo | Comment on Coming back for more... Read Coming back for more...