Misadventures in Atlanta Blog is on the Move!
Attention Readers! We have moved! The Misadventures in Atlanta Blog can be found here. The new technology will improve our blog and commenting experience. Update your bookmarks and RSS feeds!
AJC.com > Living > Blog > Archives > 2008 > October > 30 > Entry
DEL.ICIO.USDating like cats and dogs
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
Any pet lover knows that when it comes to dating, a new love makes three. And as we all know, three can be a crowd.
A couple case studies to consider:
A good friend of mine (a man) has a dog named Oscar who battles allergies and a finicky stomach; despite regular visits to the vet, the dog can be a handful of health problems. But Oscar has been my friend’s companion for nearly a decade, his buddy and family when he was going through rough times. (I resisted typing “ruff” times.) Last spring, my friend called me in distress. Just weeks before his girlfriend was scheduled to move into his home, she suggested to him that 1) the dog might be better off in the country where he’d have more space to run or 2) she wanted a contract detailing her role in caring for Oscar. (Keep in mind that option 1 didn’t mean they’d get a country estate. She wanted the dog gone.)
I don’t care much for this girl, so I hoped this would be the end of their already rocky relationship. Instead, they “worked it out” without having to give up Oscar or signing a contract. I think after he told her (again) how important the dog was, she relented.
Q: What would you have done in his shoes? Do you think she was justified in wanting a written description of her dog duties?
Another story: Another friend of mine (he can be “Jake”) stopped seeing his girlfriend because she insisted that her four dogs sleep in the bed with them. That’s how she slept as a single woman, and refused to have them elsewhere when he stayed over. Jake admits he really likes the girl, but sleeping with 16 furry legs is out of the question.
Q: Does Jake sound picky, or does she seem weird? How many of you keep Fluffy or Muffy by your side, but would you move them for an overnight guest?
Final tale: A reader wrote to me with another “tail” of dog-induced relationship demise. He had been seeing a woman for eight months, quite seriously he thought. The only problem? When they cuddled on the couch, the pooch would bark and snarl his way. He admits he’s not a dog lover, but said when he finally asked her to “correct the behavior,” an argument escalated into a break-up. They’ve begun to reconcile, but she gave our reader (let’s call him DoggieDave) an ultimatum: act lovingly toward her dog or get lost.
His words: I feel like all I can do is respect how you feel about your pet and you can not demand I become a dog lover when I am not… I in no way am trying to replace the dog as the center of her world. I am a very secure person. But this makes me wonder if she loves the dog so much that she does not have “room” to really love a man.
Question: Have any of you dated someone you felt loved their pet more than they were capable of loving you? Is that bond easy to understand or hard to respect? Has someone’s pet ever been the cause of your break-up, or what about times our furry friends brought you together?
Passionate about pets? Visit ajcpets
Permalink | Comments (229) | Post your comment | Categories: Dating
Services »
Comments
By Kym
October 30, 2008 8:49 AM | Link to this
Good Morning All,
I have no clue what to say on this topic..I am a dog owner and animal lover. If I had a bigger place I most likely would have two dogs.
If the person I dated had a problem with my dog I would do my best to keep his contact with my dog to a minmum. But if things progressed to serious, and there were talks of moving or living together well the dog is family..so he would have to accept that. Now my dog is not sleeping on the beds or anything wild like that…she is just apart of our family now and I would expect she would be apart of the family later.
Oh girl with the 4 dogs on the bed has some serious issues and frankly that story sounds like a episode of “How I Married your mother”.
By Faithful Friend
October 30, 2008 8:53 AM | Link to this
Dog first, girl second. Dog has been my faithful companion for 12 years - no girl has even come close to that - got tired of most of them after a few months. Any girl that even remotely suggests that the dog must go away will be dropped off on the side of the road with a quarter to call a cab.
By Raqi
October 30, 2008 9:02 AM | Link to this
Ain’t no way on God’s green earth or in Satan’s den would I ever play second fiddle to a freakin’ animal. I don’t hate pets but I don’t particularly care for them, especially in the house. And definitely in my house. Pets are not people too. They are soulless creatures that are to be kept in their place.
I knew a few guys that had pets, but thankfully I never got serious with them that I had to find out if they loved the company of that animal over the company of a woman.
By Riz
October 30, 2008 9:06 AM | Link to this
Dogs provide unconditional love. No quetions asked and no complaints offered.
Contract? Contract???? I’d sign the contract, wait till things progressed to a proposal then drop a 25% earnings and 15% property Pre-nup on her a* - There’s a contract for you Bi&*$!
By Leggs
October 30, 2008 9:10 AM | Link to this
WOW, WOW, WOW! First, I feel she was wrong in asking him to take Oscar to the country. Break up right there for me. Second, for her to insist the 4 dogs (4, not 1) sleep in the bed when her boyfriend is over is ridiculous. Break up right there for me. Third, you shouldn’t force someone to be an dog lover if they aren’t. Not necessarily break up right there, but an ultimatum I don’t think so. Ok, back to the second one. If you’re use to sleeping with 4 dogs and won’t remove them from your bed when your boyfriend is over, YOU DON’T NEED A BOYFRIEND.
By Raqi
October 30, 2008 9:15 AM | Link to this
You know what is ironic, people will put up with taking care of a dog, feeding it, bathing it, cleaning up its crap, while the dog gives nothing back, but will desert a mate the falls ill and need all of the previously mentioned after said mate has been with them for years. And actually contributed to the relationship.
A man that used to work here left his ailing wife after 20+ years and took the dogs with him.
This is a sick generation we are living in.
By Dan
October 30, 2008 9:22 AM | Link to this
Scenario 1:
The dude wanted the relationship more than the woman. She knows this and was exerting hand “the dog or me”. His stand took some of the power but no all (from her) and her control issue will rise again.
Scenario 2:
Dogs are territorial. So if this strange person starts sleeping in their bed with them, things could go wrong.
If dude maintains a pack leader mentality all should go well. And in doing so he will provide the girl with comfort and her realizing that she doesn’t need the dogs for comfort or protection - that’s his job now.
Scenario 3:
The dog is fighting for his position. The interloper will not be tolerated and he is letting the dude know that.
So like scenario 2, dude must assert himself as pack leader, both with the dog and with the female.
Conclusion:
Animals are intiuitive, they sense things on a level that humans do not. So a weak guy will get punked by a dog (a good barometer ladies). But a stronger man will walk into a home that the animal has inhabited for 10 years and instantly run things.
QED - The difference between demanding and commanding respect (even in the animal kingdom)
By RELL - LMAO
October 30, 2008 9:23 AM | Link to this
WHITE FOLKS ARE CRAZY…LMAO….dogs were not meant to sleep with humans…what are we a dayum pack….men should train there domestic animals to know there place…men should date women with compatiable interest…clearly that hot blonde is not a dog lover…but again only white folks…lol
By melodie
October 30, 2008 9:31 AM | Link to this
In 1997 my daughter worked with a woman who’s brother was recently divorced. She kept asking if it would be alright if her co-workers brother called me. I finally agreed and the first time I talked to him I told him that I had a cat, he told me he did not like cat’s. I told him I had always had a cat and sometimes had dogs also, but when I divorced I got the cat’s and my ex-husband got the dog. It had been a number of year’s since my divorce and both of the cat’s I had then were gone and I had a 5 year old named Jake. I explained to him that Jake and I had been constant companions, doing everything together. We even went camping together and of course Jake slept on my bed at night. I told him I could not imagine life without a cat and that I would always have one. After we began dating it became clear to me that the reason he did not like cat’s was he had never gotten to know one. About 4 months after we started dating he called me one night very upset, he had returned home after a date with me. When he went out to feed his dog he had found her dead, she was 16 years old. A few months later he called me to tell me that one of the ladies at his work had a litter of kittens that were born in her garage a few weeks before. He had gone to look at them and was going to give one of them a home. The one he had picked was part Manx like Jake, Jake has what looks like a little powder puff, bunny rabbit tail, the kitten he picked just had even less of a tail. He named her Toni. A week after he brought her home we got married. We did start shutting the bedroom door at night and Jake does not sleep with us. However if I am home alone I leave the door open so they can come and sleep with me. Jake is now 16, we have 3 more cats, but we lost Toni to cancer last year at age 9. For someone who does not like cat’s he sure does spend a lot of time petting them and playing with them.
By Raqi
October 30, 2008 9:34 AM | Link to this
Rell Only in America do people put their pets above the needs and desires of the one they were actually created to mate with. LOL SMH
By Keep it real!
October 30, 2008 9:40 AM | Link to this
Of course! Dogs are man best friend!
No talking back, No question our authority. Obeying our commands!
Blanca since you finally got out of that loser relationship I have someone for you!
By NY2GA, Inc.
October 30, 2008 9:40 AM | Link to this
I’m a dog owner, too. I agree with *Kym’s * post. I let the men I date know that I have a dog that you can’t put in a purse and carry him around. He almost weighs as much as I do! There’s only been one occasion where a man that I was dating and my dog didn’t get along. Yep, big fella was picking up on something with that particular person that I didn’t initially. And he was right-Boy, my dog’s got one helluva gaydar…lol.
By RELL - LMAO
October 30, 2008 9:41 AM | Link to this
@raqi….when reading this topic i am thinking this does not happen in my community AT ALL….i mean the only crazy things brothere do with there pets is let them smoke weed with them…drank liquor with them or feed them gun powder to make them meanier….but sleepin in the house or coming before some poo see…NOT GOING TO HAPPEN…hell to some low level brothers poo see comes before money…i will lurk until we topic change or ared post something to make someone respond….
By Raqi
October 30, 2008 9:44 AM | Link to this
If man was meant to bond with a four footed beast instead of a compatible human being, why was Adam lonely before Eve was made? Dogs and all manner of beast were there with Adam but he was lonely. That’s because he was never meant to have that bond with a beast. Man and woman are meant to be together over and above all else. Heck you know if we are to forsake all others (mother, father, sister, brother) to be with our mate, animals are definitely to be put and left in their place.
By Leggs
October 30, 2008 9:48 AM | Link to this
I cannot see myself sleeping w/an animal. My daughter, not I, has a cat. I close my door at night so Tigger doesn’t jump on my face in the middle of the night scaring the heebee jeebies out of me.
Glad things worked out for you melodie. A dog lover turned cat lover!
I too SMH at that Raqi
By Faithful Friend
October 30, 2008 9:49 AM | Link to this
Raqi - Here’s your quarter - call someone who cares.
By MELO
October 30, 2008 9:52 AM | Link to this
Animaaal live in the bush outside.No animaaal in da house. What psycho shid is dis u all talking about? Dog and cat competing with me for a girl’s attention on the bed.
Ur pudsy would have to be ringed around with gold,diamonds,honey,trace minerals and other real sweet stuff for me to reduce myself to that kind of barbaric competition. U serious Blanca,this is a dating topic today?? Tuesday,we got to change all that.Next 4 years, everybody gets to taste some yams,collards,blackeye,neckbone,piglegs,occra,pumpkin leaves,grits,tripe(cow insides) and goat meat.Only after then, can america be really one people!!
By The Truth
October 30, 2008 9:52 AM | Link to this
My kind of topic. LOL
First, the relationship you have with a dog and with a woman are totally different. I love my dogs, in a way that you’re supposed to love dogs. They don’t sleep with me, they don’t sit on MY furniture or chew on MY shoes or anything like that. They follow MY rules because 1) I’m the alpha 2) I feed them, they don’t feed me
The women I have dated kinda got off on hanging with the dogs so the only thing I had to do is show her the little things that MUST be done to be higher in the pack structure than the dog. I would not want a woman to be lower in the pack than the dogs in the same way she won’t be lower than any children. We are the king and queen and everyone or thing we care for follows us. Period.
Also, I can get a chick and let her walk through the park with my dogs and she’ll be amazed at how many people stop to talk to her. They serve as an ice breaker. My dogs are hella good lookin btw. LOL
I know people that humanize their dogs and usually get bit doing so. Btw, the best way to get bit by your dog is let them sleep with you. When people say they’ve gotten bit thats the first question I ask.
My last gf would take my male out and walk him and I knew she could handle him. They weighed about the same, 135, but she had heart and he knew it. It was never an issue. She was higher in the food chain than he was. She understood.
With that being said, my dogs are my escape. When I’m with them my clothes don’t have to coordinate, it doesn’t matter if I have my cell or jewelry, or even if I’ve bathed. The only thing that matters is that we’re hanging and having fun, and they listen to my commands. Thats it.
Rell AA do it too. I think some people are lonely and use the dogs to fill that void. Thats alot to put on a dog.
By RELL - LMAO
October 30, 2008 9:54 AM | Link to this
@faithful friend….middle fanga….this whole topic is flucking stoopid…and i never complain but come on….animals like children have no place in the “dating” phase…i mean you dating not talking marriage…and if you dating to marry then you will lose….folks lose becasue they focus on the outcome and not the process….plus plus….if you a die hard nazi grubbing pet lover…then you need to find another cult follower and shack up…i mean come on are you that flucking re tard ed
By Riz
October 30, 2008 9:54 AM | Link to this
Blanca - I can’t imagine how difficult it must be for you and WD to consistently think of these columns every morning. It’s gotta be a distinct challange that tests the limits of your creativity.
However - in the future it might be best to limit topics like these since it creates a big culture gap that will alienate a percentage of your readers.
My $.02 - keep up the good work.
By Raqi
October 30, 2008 9:55 AM | Link to this
Leggs it just amazes me how some human beings can be devoted to any and everything except another human being.
By Leggs
October 30, 2008 9:57 AM | Link to this
I was just about to say, can’t wait to see what Truth has to say, and here you is.
By MLL
October 30, 2008 9:58 AM | Link to this
My late husband owned a snake when I first met him. He would walk around with sam on his shoulders and let sam hang around his neck like he was a piece of jewerly, just seeing that snake always sent chills down my spin. One day we were at his house and he some how sam got out of the aqurium, I ended up staying in the bathroom for hours until sam was found after that it was me or sam, well we ended up getting married and sam ended up with a close friend.
A couple of years ago I breifly dated a guy who had a mini jungle at his house, one pet in particular that stood out from all the rest was his pet tarantula spider, Everytime I went over to his house I would start itching, fearing his 8 legged friend crawling up my legs.
By RELL - LMAO
October 30, 2008 10:03 AM | Link to this
alienate a percentage of your readers.
not me - i just dont see how it has its place in dating or this stoopid increase of pets being included in divorce….folks try to fill that void with all types of s** then fight for the possesion of it when s** goes bad….instead of talking about the TRUTH of the matter…they fill it with dogs, new cars, kids, affairs, strip clubs, etc…..but i see we still in the bs stage with this dating game….
By Beautiful
October 30, 2008 10:05 AM | Link to this
rizzo why don’t you help a sista out then! her email is blance@ajc.com. y’all killin’ me.
and the lil My $.02 - keep up the good work. is straight bullshiit. how you gonna complain and then turn around and say good job! wtf ever.
i’m irritated now.
good morning ev1.
By M'Karyl
October 30, 2008 10:07 AM | Link to this
Well, I have never own an animal but I do have great affection for them as living creatures…but I think that when such inherent differnces exist(especially very early in the relationship) about animal rights, attention, priorities…well, then common sense should make an obvious decision…I do not disrespect how other ppl feel about the pets/friends and I would not come beteween that bonding…but if it was also something that I could not accommodate, then I would be the one to retract my presence because I am the one with the problem that will become an issue for both ppl…some things are just like that…
By Beautiful
October 30, 2008 10:08 AM | Link to this
one pet in particular that stood out from all the rest was his pet tarantula spider
aw h3ll to the naw! lol. hi MLL!
By Kym
October 30, 2008 10:13 AM | Link to this
Truth I am going to have to take our dog to a obedience class with me I am alpha..with my son she is like dude you just like me. My son is the more compassionate they play tug of war etc. But when its is time to sit she will not do a thang he says unless he has doggie treats. So we are going to have to take a class.
By AmazonRed
October 30, 2008 10:14 AM | Link to this
Morning folks! My co workers dressed up for Halloween today. They are hilarious.
On topic When I was 12 my sisters begged my parents for a puppy. They were 11 and 9. Knowing they were as flighty as fairy dust, I went to my parents and told them that the dog would be THEIR’S. I didn’t want to walk it or feed it or pick up it’s poop. Lo and behold, after about 6 months my mother was the only one taking care of the dog. Eventually my dad had it put to sleep. :-/
Needless to say, I’ve never been an animal lover.
In any case, pets are still living things and part of the family for some. I don’t want to take responsibility for a pet, I never have. But if I met a guy with a pet, I wouldn’t make the situation worse. If he was gone for a day or something I’d help out. I have several friends who don’t like pets but married spouses that came with em. They deal.
Beau has been asking to get a dog tho and I told him NO! Besides, he lives in a condo with no yard.
By The Truth
October 30, 2008 10:15 AM | Link to this
When I worked at the pen a fellow guard owned a rottweiller. That dog was trained to the t. When him and his wife got divorced that was the only thing they fought over, who would get the dog.
Rell/Raqi you 2 seem to have deep feelings about this but really its not that deep. It’s just like someone that loves their mate but also loves bowling. When the relationship ends you want to hold on to the things you care for that you have left. It’s not either/or.
I’d never put my dogs above my mate but then again I wouldn’t let a woman tell me I couldn’t have them either. It’s just a balance.
NY2GA one of the hidden benefits of having a dog is they detect when folks are up to no good. 100% never fails they can pick out a crook. Funny thing is my dog didn’t like my brother, who is a preacher and a crook. LOL He knew.
A lady came out to our training class one day selling incense. Something about that chick had every dog out there growling and barking at her. They were’nt just barking, they all turned directly towards her. It was like 10 dogs going berzerk. I wonder what was up with that chick? LOL
By Blow Me
October 30, 2008 10:20 AM | Link to this
Good MORNING
* I think its fair to say we NEED a topic change…This is not holding the crowd today.*
Okay who wants to start the new topic?
By China Doll
October 30, 2008 10:20 AM | Link to this
Black folks have different rules when it comes to animals.
By AmazonRed
October 30, 2008 10:22 AM | Link to this
That should have read: “Beau has been asking if he should get a dog..” I clarified cuz I know how it reads the other way. LOL
By lurker
October 30, 2008 10:22 AM | Link to this
We have cute little mice in the house. I put out traps last night (7) and his butt went around and ate all the cheese and peanut butter. Any suggestions?
By MLL
October 30, 2008 10:22 AM | Link to this
Angie awww h3lls yeah! dat ol’freaky freak LOL
By M'Karyl
October 30, 2008 10:23 AM | Link to this
This ish is like so many others in the relationship paradigm…what values are compatible, compromisable and worth the effort…somethings can be accommodated within the relationship and somethings can not…at some point we need to know what we are willing to accept as such and what we are not…choices that we make on the front end to accommodate something that we will resent on the back end are of our own making…be it pets, children, smoking, behaviors…we do own our choices.
By Dan
October 30, 2008 10:25 AM | Link to this
@Truth
I have a homegirl (a couple actually) that have been single for a while, and they wanted to get dogs. I didn’t give ‘em any suggestions but I watched to see if they got the dog.
To me, a single woman with a dog is trying to fill that spot left by the lack of an SO. She wants someone to dote on, someone to be company, and ultimately someone to love.
Neither of them got the dogs, and only one has a man. But both eventually realized that the dog wouldn’t be what they really wanted.
I really be watching the chicks that overpersonify dogs. If they that attached (to their “baby”), I want no parts even if she fine…
By Raqi
October 30, 2008 10:26 AM | Link to this
Truth I don’t hate animals but I believe animals should stay animals. They should not take the place of another human being. And they cannot fulfill the role that another human being was meant to fill. Hobbies as you mentioned are the same.
I have had two dogs because they were given to my sons. But they remained dogs. It was sad to that some one stole Romeo but not the kind of sadness that I would have if a love one died or left.
My issue is ain’t no way I will be second in a man’s life when it came to his animals. That man would not be the one for me.
By Wise Diva
October 30, 2008 10:26 AM | Link to this
I can’t believe ya’ll are making this about race, LOL. There are so many people of color who are intense with their pet love/adoration!
I know 3 women, who love their pets so much that they actually worry about their pet accepting/adjusting to the men in their lives! I understand it may not be common for some of you, but, in my experience, it’s not always a cultural/racial difference.
I already have puppy fever, so I kind of like this topic!
By Leggs
October 30, 2008 10:26 AM | Link to this
ARed, I too would have gone to my parents saying the same thing. I am not walking a dog in the cold, rain, sleet nor snow. My child wanted a puppy, but I knew she would play with it, but wouldn’t take care of it by walking it nor training it. I knew I wouldn’t and that’s why she has a cat. I somewhat fear dogs and no doubt they can smell it. A long time ago, this little creature knew I was afraid of it. I tried to mask it, but inherently, it’s something you can’t do. The third day around this dog it jumped in my lap and when I jumped up it bit me in the leg.
By AmazonRed
October 30, 2008 10:27 AM | Link to this
Oh yeah, and sleeping with 16 furry legs IS out of the question. You don’t have to get rid of your dogs, but they will have to be rid of the place that I sleep! I have my own room/bed in protest til the situation was resolved! (for someone I really liked).
By C tha 1
October 30, 2008 10:27 AM | Link to this
I’m not a dog owner, but I don’t hate dogs either. I don’t have room for one in my life right now and everybody is always trying to give me one. I believe if you feed it and care for it then it is technically a dependent, therefore you can write them off on your taxes. But I don’t believe the IRS will go for that.
By RELL - LMAO
October 30, 2008 10:28 AM | Link to this
@Trtuth…brah i think you reading me wrong..i am dog lover number one…i respect them…i respect that even when trained they can still act on that basic primal instinct to bite…hell i am a pet lover….i have had tree frogs, hermit grabs, mice, gerbels, hamsters, parrot, fish, goldfish, dogs, cats, snacks,…i have owned 2 boxers, a rotty, lab, pit, sherperd in my lifetime…and they were never the topic in a relationship…hell right now i want a bulldog.either a mini or an english…i am looking now..
By Leggs
October 30, 2008 10:30 AM | Link to this
Glad you clarified ARed, cuz I was thinking….OKAY???? (LOL).
Anway, ChinaDoll, you’re right. Take Leona Hemsley leaving all that money to her dogs. Well, may not be a good example, she didn’t like people and people didn’t like her.
By Blow Me
October 30, 2008 10:31 AM | Link to this
WD Come on…most of our dogs are outside on a chain! It’s obvious…just by some of the post you have on this blog. WE are not into our dogs like that. REALLY! Let’s be honest.
By NY2GA, Inc.
October 30, 2008 10:31 AM | Link to this
@TruthLOL at your 10:15. But, it’s true, they do pick up on things.
So, let’s let our dogs loose around some of the blog folks and see what happens. Ready??
By mqew
October 30, 2008 10:34 AM | Link to this
IF I HAD 99 PROBLEMS A BYTCH WOULD NEVER BE ONE
MORNING :-)
By AmazonRed
October 30, 2008 10:35 AM | Link to this
I can’t believe ya’ll are making this about race, LOL.
LOL WiseDiva, this is still an AJC blog. It’s like a theme song on here. :-/
Leggs, I’m just glad my parents understood. I really knew that dog would be neglected and I wanted them to know I wasn’t about to make promises I wouldn’t keep!
I did have a pet guinea pig for a time though. My dad didn’t like the smell and he made me put it outside on the back porch. She froze to death (in CA!). :-/
By Teresa
October 30, 2008 10:37 AM | Link to this
Ok, lets do a blog check..how many of us have outside dogs?
By Raqi
October 30, 2008 10:38 AM | Link to this
WiseDiva Pets. Are. Not. People. And yeah when speaking of the human “race” I do believe some people have a sick obsession when it comes to their love for an animal over the love for another person.
But you know our differences is what make for a great discussion.
By M'Karyl
October 30, 2008 10:39 AM | Link to this
They were’nt just barking, they all turned directly towards her. It was like 10 dogs going berzerk. I wonder what was up with that chick?
@Truth
True, animals are quite intuitive…and even I pay attention to how they behave around ppl…one can learn a lot…most ppl with pets can tell immediately that I am a good person because their animals bond with me instantly…even those that tend to be standoffish with ppl in general…Funny story, I had a neighbor whom I saw with her small dog on a regular basis…he would bark like nuts when I passed…almost like he was instantly crazy…she did not understand why…she would apologize and say he normally was not like that with ppl…I would smile and keep moving…well, one day I stopped and talked to the woman and the dog…the dog did its dog thing…sniffing, etc…eventually the lady and I developed a rapport…I would stop by her house and have tea or something…turns out that she was very lonely…recently widowed and had no friends…so I became her friend…after that, the little mug would constantly look for me when I passed the up the street and sure enough, if he saw me passing by…nuts he would go again…funny, how he knew I would make a good friend for a lonely lady.
By NY2GA, Inc.
October 30, 2008 10:41 AM | Link to this
To me, a single woman with a dog is trying to fill that spot left by the lack of an SO. She wants someone to dote on, someone to be company, and ultimately someone to love.
@Dan That all may hold true for some women. I mostly wanted something to be able to take a chunk out of somebody’s behind while I run to get my friend Glock. This is a crazy world and you need all the protection you can get.
…I’m done for the day. Peace.
By Kym
October 30, 2008 10:49 AM | Link to this
Dan I am single and we have had two dogs..both because my son wanted them. The first was a little terrior horrible with children but was my mother’s constant companion until she(my mother) past away and we had to give him up. And now we have a shepard mix because my son wanted a dog he could actually “play” with. I didn’t get the dogs to fill a void they were/are functioning members of our family.
By Beautiful
October 30, 2008 10:49 AM | Link to this
the problems i have are 1 when his house stinks like his dogs. 2 when his backyard is jacked up with poop, holes that the dogs dug and no grass. 3 dogs are not taken care of properly with shots. 4 he doesn’t play with them. their in the back all day by themselves. no walks with the leash. 5 not feed right. dogs shouldn’t eat table scraps. 6 he has too many. four dogs is a bit much, don’t you think? 7 doesn’t give no love. dogs love hugs, pats, massages, etc.
also, my sis bought her dogs health insurance. lawd jeezus.
By AmazonRed
October 30, 2008 10:50 AM | Link to this
We are the king and queen and everyone or thing we care for follows us. Period.
That’s sexy. Good post Truth
By MELO
October 30, 2008 10:50 AM | Link to this
Maybe this topic reveals smthing about whats wrong with some of uall’s dating habits WD. Seriously, if u luv animals like that,to the extend where u wld potentially clash with a guy over a dog or cat, and ur dating is primarily around black folks,then ur pickings maybe slim there coz of ur interests.Widen the scope. I do luv dogs but like C tha 1 said, i prioritize where my money goes.I have no money nor time to feed and take care,medically of a dog.Im still looking for money to get my daughter some braces.Most black folks are like me,their money aint enough to go around like that to waste it on a dog! Coz we are,by our blackness,not as affluent as a sub group.Nothing about race per se.And some of the dogs i have seen in some parts of SWA are really emaciated,they walk sideways,thin and hungry.They wld rather be condemned! How can i spend 3/4/5 thousand dollars a year on dog care when i do not have a 401k,medical insuarance etc?
By M'Karyl
October 30, 2008 10:50 AM | Link to this
@mqew
LMAO at your 10:34 post…gotta a chick I know here that say the same thing everyday…lol.
@Raqi
yes, there are some ppl who have a very interesting and inexplicable bonding with their pets…something that borders on not normal…perhaps the emotional affection they feel from that attachment satisfies something they can not have with another person…I do not know…different strokes for different folks.
By abc
October 30, 2008 10:51 AM | Link to this
A casual approach to pet ownership demonstrates immaturity and self-centeredness. I consider adoption of my retired racing greyhound a lifetime commitment to caring for the dog. If people don’t feel that way about it, they should do the humane thing, and not have pets.
So, the chick that wanted the dog gone is a loser, IMHO. Better off without such callus clods.
Dogs have to be trained. A dog that growls, barks, or shows aggressiveness toward people has to be trained to not be so. Period. A dog has to be trusted around babies, even unattended, or that dog isn’t fit for human company.
So, the growling dog needs to be trained, and it’s his owner’s responsibility to do so. The guest could try to make friends with the dog, I suppose.
Ain’t no dayum dogs sleeping in a bed with me. No way, no how. That’s just plain unhygienic, smelly, itchy and scratchy. Like, brush the dog hair out of your own when you wake up? No thank you.
By The Truth
October 30, 2008 10:52 AM | Link to this
Kym what kind of dog do you have? Here’s a cure for your situation. Don’t feed the dog for a day. Don’t worry, he wont die. For the next week only let your son feed him and only by hand after he has sat down. Do this for a week and the dog will understand who is on top. Also, tell your son no more tug with the dog. Pound for pound dogs are stronger than humans, especially kids. Everytime they play the dog reinforces in his mind that he is superior to your son. If he wants to play get a ball and have him throw it. The thing is the dog must bring it back and give me MY ball. I only let him play with it.
Dan for a chick its a win win situation. If she gets the right dog and right training she can severely reduce her major fear, security. She will sleep much better knowing she has a beast patrolling the house addressing anything that moves. It’s kind of cool really. In the beginning it’s work but 4 months in you’ve got a built in security guard. At 1.5 years you have a private bodyguard.
A female attorney that trains with us has 3 dogs. A rott and 2 cane corsos. She works them off leash and her dogs will maul a grown man. They won’t touch her though. She runs that pack.
That has benefits for a man in her life also because she realizes she can communicate without talking. It’s all mental power.
Blow we finally get a topic I know something about and you want to change it. Whats up with that? Btw, I want to put a leash and collar on you and teach you a few things. And some paddling will be involved.
Lurker wow. I’ll fight a dog but I’m afraid of mice. I hate those thing. Mice and fire are my kryptonite. LOL
By Dan
October 30, 2008 10:53 AM | Link to this
@NY and Kym
Read the context of the post, the ladies were:
Single
Lonely
So if neither of these conditions apply to you directly, be not offended.
By Leggs
October 30, 2008 10:54 AM | Link to this
I love that story m’karyl. All the while the dog was going into a frenzy trying to tell you to be a friend to its master. That’s touching!
By Beautiful
October 30, 2008 10:55 AM | Link to this
IF I HAD 99 PROBLEMS A BYTCH WOULD NEVER BE ONE i heard that! lol.
By Kym
October 30, 2008 10:55 AM | Link to this
Beautiful My dog has pet insurance. Do you know how it cost to take a dog to the vet for regular check ups. Speaking of which I am wayy late with her shots. Damn let me call them right now..she will have to go Saturday morning.
By Leon Phelps
October 30, 2008 10:57 AM | Link to this
I, and several good friends have all had bad experiences with single women who have the little “purse sized dogs”.. .I mean the women who take them everywhere and treat them like a child…. Pretty much our rule is to stay away from all women with these “purse sized” dogs… Nothing good comes of it. I refuse to play second fiddle to a dog. I used to be weary of cat ladies.. but they are actually pretty cool for the most part (as long as they have 1 or maybe 2.. anything more than 2 cats is the evuivelent of a “purse dog”
By Raqi
October 30, 2008 10:58 AM | Link to this
Melo I somewhat agree with you in a general type of way. Remembering some other discussions I have read here and actually had with other people, everything these days come before the mate. Jobs, hanging with your friends and now the pets. And then people wonder why they are without. I mean look at where you are placing your priorities. When the love and needs of your mate falls 8 and 9 on your list of ten, it’s obvious that you not only don’t want one, you probably don’t need one.
By Raqi
October 30, 2008 11:02 AM | Link to this
Rather than “don’t need”, you should not be wasting the time of one.
By AmazonRed
October 30, 2008 11:05 AM | Link to this
If she gets the right dog and right training she can severely reduce her major fear, security. She will sleep much better knowing she has a beast patrolling the house addressing anything that moves. - Truth
This is kind of off topic, but I wonder why I don’t have this fear. I’ve lived alone since 2002. My mother asks me all the time if I get scared and if I ever have trouble sleeping because I’m alone in a big house (big for me at least). I sleep so soundly it’s like I’ve been drugged. I have no self defense training, no glock, not even pepper spray.
I don’t know why I don’t live in fear.
My sister has NEVER lived alone and she never wanted to.
By Beautiful
October 30, 2008 11:08 AM | Link to this
sup kym? my issue with pet insurance is the deductible is cwazy high, the limits are wack, the conditions of the policy is bs, the premium stinks, and if there’s an emergency your dogs issue may not even be covered.
i argued with her about buying it. she ended up canceling after one year. she heard me loud and clear then! she has two min pins. snoop and lil man.
i have a yorkie. pls ppl, don’t buy this type of mutt unless you have the energy to keep up with his hyper azz!
where’s new car smell? lol.
By Dan
October 30, 2008 11:10 AM | Link to this
@Truth
If I had a sister, I’d want her to have that kind of dog no doubt.
But the dogs I’m talking about are the Paris Hilton type itty-bitty dogs that can’t do nothing but “yip” if something happens.
Those are the one that get the kiddie treatment. Realistically no one would think to have a Rotwieler with a sweater on….
See what I’m saying?
By Kym
October 30, 2008 11:11 AM | Link to this
Truth She is a German Shepard Mix..Her mom was a shepard, dad was whatever dogs came out the woods and got her mom because she was part of a mix litter. My cousin has two of her brothers(I guess u say that) and they one has shepard features like my dog and the other one has features like a Rotti with a purple tongue. No more sock monkey??..aww they look so cute with the tug of war of the the sock monkey but ok. We followed your adviced for the jumping..and that is working out great..except in my son’s case..So I will print your response and give it a try.
By Beautiful
October 30, 2008 11:11 AM | Link to this
kym what’s the name of your policy holder? i would like to pass it along to her so she can check it out. thanks!
By MELO
October 30, 2008 11:11 AM | Link to this
I don’t know why I don’t live in fear its the hood in yah..
By Chink
October 30, 2008 11:18 AM | Link to this
Morning!
Not much of a pet person especially dogs since I been attacked plenty of times - NY is rough! I require dogs to stay outside I dont want to meet them just stay away from me.
ARED
I am like that too thats why I got a security system …I want to know if anything is moving on the first floor ASAP. Good for you for not having that feeling …
By LHE
October 30, 2008 11:18 AM | Link to this
I think pets are great and always grew up having an outdoor dog. I would probably have a pet now if I had the time to raise and train one. However, a man with a minture dog… deal breaker. No single man should own a dog that is small enough to be steped on.
By The Truth
October 30, 2008 11:18 AM | Link to this
Beautiful the dog digs holes because its not getting enough exercise. It’s frustrated with pent up energy. Walk that dog for an hour a day and watch the digging stop. also, dogs don’t need hugs, the owner does that for themselves. You’ve never seen 2 dogs in the wild hugging. They interact in their own way.
Another good way to get bit is feed a dog from the table. Here’s the sequence. Next the dog will start looking at you while you’re eating, which is disrespectful. He’d never look at the alpha while eating. Since you didn’t address that he’ll next make a move, depending on how dominant he is, on the food and finally growl or bite. Like in a relationship, these things don’t just happen. Stop it before it gets started. The dog eats from his bowl or my hand.
Kym when I first got my dogs I got all the shots and the whole thing. Now I take them once a year for a checkup and they dont have problems. No more shots or vet visits unless there’s an emergency. Puppy shots for parvo and such are necessary but thats it. My dogs haven’t missed a beat. The vets are as corrupt as used car salesman. They dont need all the shots they get.
By alphanista
October 30, 2008 11:20 AM | Link to this
Last week, a male friend told me he would never date a girl with a pet. He said it showed him that she resigned her life to being single and that she gave little thought to how a pet would affect a new relationship. This is true. Pets have needs. Many men do not like the dog being fed before them. They also don’t like stepping over a dog, kicking the dog out of the way, or walking your little S**, especially if he’s straight. But Yorkies and the like have become the rage for single black women sporting them like precious “real” babies. Single black women like little dogs, now if they can only get the right, big dog all would be well.
By Kym
October 30, 2008 11:22 AM | Link to this
Beautiful, I dont know what kind she had but my payment is 22.00 a month, meds for heartworms is like 100.00 a year.(2-6 month supplies) and all the shots each year are included in the plan.
Heck when we had her spayed(lawd my sister still talks about how that was not right) it was included in the insurance. Now they are talking about she needs a dental treatment..127.00 bucks but I can up my plan by 5.00 bucks a month and cover that if I choose to. I have the Banfield pet plan. My cousin had a dog to have to go on nerve meds(shut up Truth) that medication was fairly cheap compared to what she would have paid had she not had the plan. Look I have insurance for myself and my son..why wouldn’t I cover my other family member too.
By M'Karyl
October 30, 2008 11:23 AM | Link to this
@leggs
we should always be able to listen to GOD…wherever He may be and however He may come…I would like to believe that my life experiences have taught me to not allow my personal ego to dismiss my inner God calling…we just never know how He will be found.
By Willie Dynamite
October 30, 2008 11:25 AM | Link to this
Morning All,
I grew up having dogs all my life. I cant say i’m a dog lover tho. I also cant say I’m against animals. what I am against is personalizing an animal to the point that it becomes bigger/better than a human life. It is obviously your choice to do so becuz of whatever reason you so choose. Some do it for companionship, loyalty or whatever. If i ever had to be chosen over an animal that that would let me know I wasnt the one. PERIOD. What I will say is that our Society is at a point where I’d prolly get more time for kicking a dog than slapping an ol lady in the street. To me that is whats truly sad about this whole thing. Not even getting on a dating level.
By M'Karyl
October 30, 2008 11:28 AM | Link to this
If a woman chooses to invest her time in a dog or cat as an option to other types of companionship…then so be it…who are we to dictate how other ppl channel their needs for affection and loyalty????…and if a man decides to kick it with his dog as if they are true homies…and he is loyal to that bond at all cost…so be that too…wneh ppl’s behaviors and attitudes convey somethng to me about them, then so it is…it anything is done with compassion and empathy…then who am I to question it???
By mqew
October 30, 2008 11:30 AM | Link to this
OH and what truth said about it’s an AA thing as well.
I had a friend that had stairs for her dog to get on the bed. When her bf would sleep over, the dog would just wait till they finished then get in where she fit in. SMH
By i'm swiss
October 30, 2008 11:31 AM | Link to this
@Truth — Cosign your 9:52. I love dogs, but dogs are animals, not people, and are actually happiest when treated as such. They want their owners to be pack leaders, not equals.
4 dogs sleeping in the bed? That chic’s on the fast track to being “that crazy dog lady.” Who in his/her right mind would put up with that BS?
By AmazonRed
October 30, 2008 11:31 AM | Link to this
its the hood in yah..
melo, oh yeah, that must be it. LOL
Chink, I do have an alarm system, but really what good is it if someone breaks in? All it will do is tell the police that I’m dead. I weigh 135 soaking wet. I’m a sitting duck if someone breaks in.
Sad but true!
By Beautiful
October 30, 2008 11:31 AM | Link to this
My cousin had a dog to have to go on nerve meds(shut up Truth) lol.
i’ve seen dogs on meds for arthritis and diabetes. wow!
By Raqi
October 30, 2008 11:38 AM | Link to this
It’s frustrated with pent up energy
Truth I believe that to be true. The little while we had the mini dog it would stay in the laundry room when every one left the house. When we would get home and let her out she would take out running around the yard and would do several laps before she tired out. My son put a stuffed toy in there once and when we came home one day it was shredded to pieces.
By Beautiful
October 30, 2008 11:38 AM | Link to this
All it will do is tell the police that I’m dead lol.
and my sis has a dayum doggie door! smh.
works calling
By Blow Me
October 30, 2008 11:38 AM | Link to this
Truth Yes..I know this is right up your alley. But please spare us today. The way things are going I’m liable to start a BLOG FIGHT.
By Dan
October 30, 2008 11:39 AM | Link to this
@M’K
From a perspective you’re right about dictating how people channel those emotions. That’s not my thing though.
People that do that are retreating. They are retreating from finding meaningful companionship, a meaningful relationship, a meaningful human relationship to have.
Why pour all that emotion into an animal that can only give blind loyalty? Becuase some man/woman has hurt you to the point that you’re too scared(or scarred) to trust a human again?
That’s when it bothers me, becuase that person is not being fair to the animal or to themselves. And my concern is really only superficial (live your life - hey ey ey ey ey. Making your paper, live your life).
If that’s how one chooses to deal with betrayal instead of moving on and really dealing with it, so be it.
If I care, I find it sad. If I don’t care, I find it sad, but do you.
By Chink
October 30, 2008 11:39 AM | Link to this
ARED
I like to believe that by being alerted that someone is in ….I can either find a way out or scream for help…Um I am not waiting for the monitoring system to call anyone! Shoot I probably could call 911 too in my escape…I am not going down without a fight or something.
By MLL
October 30, 2008 11:41 AM | Link to this
i’ve seen dogs on meds for arthritis and diabetes Angie dogs are getting aliments just like humans now….
By Dan
October 30, 2008 11:42 AM | Link to this
@Blow
I’ve had dogs…
When they got sick or hurt, taking them to the vet was not an option (feeding them was hard enough)…
Brownie I & II took rides with me and my uncle…
And that was all there was to it
By Kym
October 30, 2008 11:44 AM | Link to this
Truth I have had the insurance since she was a puppy. I didnt want to deal with a dog going into heat..so it came in handy when she had to be fixed. I also worry about Parvo. We had a neighbor who’s dog died from that. I get the rabies shot because its the law. Fulton Co sends me a cute little bill for 10.00 every year for her pet license.
By SexyCool
October 30, 2008 11:49 AM | Link to this
wise…remember when fez got in trouble and ran out the house and i didn’t go look for him??? of course…he showed up the next morning…dayum dog…
wise can vouch for the fact that whereas i was a decently responsible pet owner…i am so NOT a pet lover…
in fact…i am pretty certain fez will be the last pet i ever attempt to live with…
By Blow Me.....a.k.a. I like my popcorn wit HOT SAUCE
October 30, 2008 11:49 AM | Link to this
Dan Dayumm! You had em but didn’t take them to the vet. That is cold blooded…I am gonna need you to do better. R.i.p Brownie number 1 and 2….lol!
By AmazonRed
October 30, 2008 11:52 AM | Link to this
…Um I am not waiting for the monitoring system to call anyone! Shoot I probably could call 911 too in my escape…I am not going down without a fight or something.
Chink, I’m going down fighting if I can. But remember, I told you I sleep like I’m drugged. If someone is coming after me, he’ll probably be pretty darn close before I realize what’s going on.
If the intruder is just trying to rob me, he picked the wrong house. LOL. I don’t have any expensive stuff! LOL
But I tell you, the ability to sleep soundly is one of the best things in the world. My mother told me that once I have kids, I’ll never sleep like that again.
By Leo
October 30, 2008 11:59 AM | Link to this
I do dog rescue {unofficially} . I live in the country where people drop of strays. I take in homeless strays and try to find homes for them through newpaper adds and word of mouth. I now have 9 dogs, a motley crew of which I could not find homes for. Needless to say, I love all animals - especially dogs. They are not in the house, I have pens for them and they are well taken care of. Any man who comes into my life will have to accept that I love and care for strays. Like many things in relationships it is a matter of having the same things in common, like the love of animals. I don’t think I would be attracted to a non dog lover and visa versa. I don’t want dogs in the house or in my bed. As far as accepting a man who had his dog in his house and bed, I would make that decision before I fell in love or slept with him. Your friend knew the situation and the man had to also - they should have nipped it in the bud right from the start and found someone more in line with their thinking.
By Maria
October 30, 2008 12:02 PM | Link to this
I think you should talk to any prospective significant other about your like or dislike of pets so that everyone gets a head start on the future issues. My personal opinion is if a person gives me an ultimatum regarding my pets, that’s it I’m done with that person, I wouldn’t try to make him like my pets, because when he is angry with me he might take his anger with my pets and I wouldn’t like that at all. One can’t make a person like animals, I love my pets more than I love some family members honestly!
By mqew
October 30, 2008 12:07 PM | Link to this
I actually have a cat… But if you knew me you’d know I’m not a cat person. SO got it for me when we were in college cause I was talkin about a baby. He panicked, and got me that dang thing. It was cute as a kitten, know she’s just that bytch. She stays out my way as she is fully aware that I don’t particularly care for her.
By Chink
October 30, 2008 12:10 PM | Link to this
ARED
Not only will you not sleep like that again you will have lack of sleep too!lol Shoot the first 2-3 years no sleep…
I only sleep deeply when I am extremely exhausted…which is rare.
By AmazonRed
October 30, 2008 12:15 PM | Link to this
Not only will you not sleep like that again you will have lack of sleep too!lol Shoot the first 2-3 years no sleep…
LOL Chink. On weekends I don’t get out of bed til about 9 or 9:30. I’ll just lay there, grateful I have peace and quiet and no one to feed or needing my attention.
I’m sure the alternative (husband kids) is much better, but for now I enjoy these moments while they last! LOL
By M'Karyl
October 30, 2008 12:24 PM | Link to this
@Dan
I know this…but again, who am I to say it is right or wrong…do not get me wrong…I have some very strong opinions about those type of behaviors in ppl and what it means…but it would serve no purpose to articulate it or to behave in a manner indicative of it against their best interest…and yes, it is sad that something so painful has been left unresolved and unreconciled such that for any individual this is the only means of reconciliation…but, in these behaviors pain is not being given back to other ppl…it is being displaced in a owner/pet relationship…I guess everyone has to find his or her own way to make ammends that are viable…we all can not resolve things the same way.
By Raqi
October 30, 2008 12:27 PM | Link to this
Chink and Amazon I have never been a sound sleeper. I could always hear when my kids got up in the middle of the night. That’s a good thing. But several days ago I was telling one of my friends that I was having trouble sleeping and as a result I was having these bad headaches when I got up in the morning. She gave me an Ambien to take and that thing put me soundly out. I was well rested when I woke up however I had hit the snooze button two times and don’t remember doing it. Also my son had got up and got dressed and was down stairs eating breakfast and I never heard walk down the hall. The pill aided in me being able to sleep thru the night but I don’t like not being aware what is going on around me or right outside of my bedroom door.
By Beautiful
October 30, 2008 12:28 PM | Link to this
interesting …
All hope is lost for women over 30
I’m glad I’m not a woman who has progressed past the proverbial age of 30 without the slightest hint of a suitable marriage partner. Seemingly all hope is lost for women who fall into the category of over 30 seeking a husband! Why? You have been taught since an early age that life’s pinnacle is reached once you complete your education, establish your career and experience marriage which is the foundation to family. What many of the people feeding into your mind and spirit at an early age neglected to tell you was the first two goals could be accomplished independently; whereas, the last goal involves participation and cooperation from another responsible and willing human vessel.
How does a woman rebound from a twisted perspective induced by today’s society and remain focused on the things in life that truly matter?
By AmazonRed
October 30, 2008 12:34 PM | Link to this
I don’t like not being aware what is going on around me or right outside of my bedroom door.
Raqi, I feel you, but for me it’s all I’ve ever known. I hope it will be different when I have kids!
I’m glad the medication worked for you. I’m sure it’s just stress keeping you up. I hope your father in law is getting better.
By M'Karyl
October 30, 2008 12:35 PM | Link to this
I’ll just lay there, grateful I have peace and quiet and no one to feed or needing my attention.
@ARed
That is true living for me…my aging years have made the desire of such predictable solitude unretractable in my routine…lol…and I ceased thinking about the alternatives a very long time ago…lol…it just that boundary thing.
By The Truth
October 30, 2008 12:40 PM | Link to this
Kym this is the agreement I have with my dogs. I will take as good of care of them as I can. They will get walks, play, shelter and treats. When they get to a point they can’t enjoy the life that we’ve shared I will do the responsible thing and send them on. I lost 2 dogs last year and while I miss them it was the best thing. One died after getting fixed. She was real special in that she could hurt a dude, through the training suit. To this day I’ve never seen a dog bite as hard as her. She was 90 pounds of wuppazz. The other I had to put down for medical reasons.
My dogs will never be on never ending meds or artificial support. Then again if they have me on support with no recovery in sight I want someone to pull the plug.
Blow you having a rough day? come and lay your head on my lap, face down, and let me rub your back.
alphanista you should always eat before the dog. Even if you have to have a cracker. The alpa always eats first.
Alot of the problems we have with our dogs are the problems we have with our mates. We simply don’t understand the rules that apply. Once again, set your standard and enforce it, vigorously.
By Raqi
October 30, 2008 12:43 PM | Link to this
Raqi Randoms:
I got a call a little while ago stating that some of the in-laws and both of their wives are flying in today and will be staying with us, by us I mean me, during their visit. There is pretty much nothing in my house to eat because I did not do my grocery shopping last weekend. When people stay at your house they expect to at least get one meal a day. I had no intention of doing my grocery shopping before Saturday. So thanks for the less than one day notice. I have a Honey Baked gift certificate that I had planned on using for Thanksgiving but you know I think I will be using it today. It was my intention to leave work and go by Home Depot and pick up some Christmas decorations, but now I have to go home and try to prepare for house guests that I really wish would have pre-announced their coming or made arrangements to stay in a hotel. They are family and are here because a family member is extremely ill, so I do consider that but you know…
But then again it will be nice having people in the house with me for a few days.
By Jadrien
October 30, 2008 12:49 PM | Link to this
LOL. Beautiful, your new car smell just got on. How you doing today? Just got home from class and was reading the conversations. Gotta say that pets in the bed with me and my woman wouldn’t work, I just wouldn’t even go to sleep.
What’s up AmazonRed, M’Karyl, Truth, Dan, Chink and Kym. How are all you doing today?
By Raqi
October 30, 2008 12:52 PM | Link to this
my aging years have made the desire of such predictable solitude unretractable in my routine
Mkaryl you know what’s funny, I was just thinking last night how when I first got married it took a little while to get used to sharing the bed with someone every night. It took getting used to having the television on while trying to sleep and being prodded, kneed, elbowed and shoved to the edge of bed because someone much bigger than I was changing positions in his sleep. It is a bit annoying however it’s the norm now. So normal that I actually miss it and don’t quite recall the days of not having it there. LOL When something gets to be so predictable you can find yourself not functioning normally being without the very same thing that had you not functioning normal while getting used to it.
Life at best is BitterSweet.
By M'Karyl
October 30, 2008 12:56 PM | Link to this
@Jadrien
Hey bro…chillun in the church…today ‘pic is interesting…not that it applies to me, but I always enjoy the various dialogues that come out of it…funny, the hidden perception of male/female traits conveyed by relationships with animals…lol…we define things by these gender categories, when in actuality it is just human ppl shyte…guised in gender.
By Raqi
October 30, 2008 12:58 PM | Link to this
Amazon I have no doubt that it is stress. And I see how those pills can be habit forming. I was well rested.
I appreciate the mention of my f-i-l but he is doing about what is expected for his condition.
By AmazonRed
October 30, 2008 1:01 PM | Link to this
I was just thinking last night how when I first got married it took a little while to get used to sharing the bed with someone every night. It took getting used to having the television on while trying to sleep and being prodded, kneed, elbowed and shoved to the edge of bed because someone much bigger than I was changing positions in his sleep.
Raqi, I’m glad you said this. I’m trying to get used to it now, though I’m not married. But this is the first relationship I’ve had where long distance wasn’t a factor.
It’s a good thing I do sleep soundly, because he has to fall asleep with the tv on. I can not once I am sleep, I don’t hear it but I can’t sleep thru the night with it on. I’ll wake up and turn it off.
He also wakes up and turns the tv on. Usually to the news. I like silence as I get ready in the morning. I like to be with my thoughts w/out bad news of the world seeping into them. What a way to start your day! LOL.
I’m grateful for the nights spent alone at my house. I assume sharing your space just takes some getting used to…
How long do you think it took you to get used to it?
By The Truth
October 30, 2008 1:01 PM | Link to this
Ared On weekends I don’t get out of bed til about 9 or 9:30. I’ll just lay there, grateful I have peace and quiet and no one to feed or needing my attention. When its warm I still get up and take the dogs out by 7. In that sense its like having kids but I need it to get moving too. Now thats its cold everything is pushed back. I do try to build relaxation into everyday though. I have finally learned how to chill, both mentally and physically.
Jadrien top of the morning to ya.
By Blow Me
October 30, 2008 1:04 PM | Link to this
Truth Really I am having a moment….Can I cry it out on your lap?
I think I need a BLOG hug
By Jadrien
October 30, 2008 1:05 PM | Link to this
M’Karyl, this topic doesn’t really apply to me either since i haven’t had a pet since i was in the 2nd grade (two rabbits). I ain’t got nothin against animals and wouldn’t mind having a pet, but not in the bed with me. Especially when my woman is with me.
By Dan
October 30, 2008 1:11 PM | Link to this
@Jadrien
What Up Homie!
@Raqi
You’re a good one. With all that’s going on, I’d save that coupon and let them know that Popeye’s is open until I go shopping.
When my mom was sick, people would pop up and expect royal treatment. “Well, (I’d tell them) the lady that do all that is sick right now, so it’s buffet or fend for self. These days it’s survival of the fittest. See all those pizza boxes….Y’all grown, you hungry- buy the food (enough for everybody) and cook. Otherwise only hospitality I got, is to take you to the eateries or the store.”
Trust you only have to say that isht once, and them freeloaders get the message.
Actually had one aunt that wanted to take the food in the freezer…told her I’d learn to cook before she took it.
I typed that to say. Take care of you and yours, now is not the time for you to worry about entertaining adults. Ckuf ‘em!
By Dan
October 30, 2008 1:12 PM | Link to this
@Blow
Woo woo woo.
Hug Now about that moniker….
J/K that’s all I got for you today.
By Raqi
October 30, 2008 1:13 PM | Link to this
Amazon LOL I don’t know. It just became normal over time. I can’t really but a time on it because I just don’t know when I got used to it. It’s like having a headache, taking something for it and not knowing the very moment it stopped hurting. All you know is you eventually realize the headache is gone. That’s how it is. Now when he comes home tonight it’s going to probably feel like he is hitting flips in the bed because it’s been more than a few days since I have had to deal with it. On again, off again. LOL
By M'Karyl
October 30, 2008 1:18 PM | Link to this
@Jadrien
Yes, if choose to be a pet owner, then I too would have my boundaries with it…I have never been in a situation where that was an issue with SO’s…but I have seen it with some rommates…one chick let her cats eat out of or off of the same bowl/plate that she ate from…right along with her…lol…needless to say…them danged cats DID NOT SHARE MY FOOD WITH ME!!!!…took some retraining of their habits for them to understand that it was not happening with me…lol
By AmazonRed
October 30, 2008 1:21 PM | Link to this
I have finally learned how to chill, both mentally and physically.
Truth, you seem to have that Zen thing going on. I’ve assumed you’ve always had it.
As for me, I’ve always taken time for myself. A lot of people seem to like constant noise and stimulation to distract them from thoughts. I need at least some kind of quiet time every day just to slow down and appreciate life and my blessings.
Hey Jadrien, glad to see u back. How’s the weather in your hood?
By Raqi
October 30, 2008 1:21 PM | Link to this
Dan Yes and no. Yes because, well you are right. But know because this is my FIL brother who just happens to be my husband favorite uncle. So I must…am willing to do it for him. Now the uncle’s wife is only 51 years old and his son’s wife is my age so they will be helping out. That I will make sure of.
By Steve
October 30, 2008 1:22 PM | Link to this
Raqi “Leggs it just amazes me how some human beings can be devoted to any and everything except another human being.”
Actually Raqi, this is where you are dead wrong. It has been proven over and over again that most people who treat their pets with respect also show more respect to humans. Meanwhile, serial killers often start out with animal cruelty and torture. Meanwhile, people who are apathetic to pets have also been found in many studies to have trouble caring about anyone or anything (even though most of the time they think they have no problems at all).
While I respect your thoughts on not being second to an animal, the reality is, if you care about someone then you will accept their pets as part of the family. You sound like the type of person that cares very little about anyones feelings other than your own based in your attitude on this board towards other posters. Your demeaning comments certainly aren’t showing a caring side at all.
As for the OP. Dump the woman in the first scenario in a heartbeat. Anyone who wants to sign a contract on what their responsibilities will be for anything after marriage is a high maintenance person who needs counseling. What’s next, a contract on what she expects from her mate every day of the week, down to the hour. Having concerns over the dog is one thing, but that kind of attitude is a recipe for failure in a relationship.
As for the second story, the animals should be put in a pen or out of the room. It’s one thing to care for and love your pets, but it’s another to let THEM run your life. You can love them and still be strict and stern with them. That being said, you probably wouldn’t want a relationship with someone like this as they obviously don’t discipline things they care about very well. Just imagine if you had kids, they would run rough-shod over her and you would be the only authority figure which would get old in a hurry.
By Snoopy
October 30, 2008 1:23 PM | Link to this
As for the last case study on the man (non-dog lover)thinking she does not have room to love a man…
He is dead wrong! She simply has prioritized that her future spouse should care for pets the way she does. I had the same demand when I was dating. I found the ideal gal without compromising my love for canines (we have two indoors; a lab and a border collie). If he cannot overcome his pet adversion then good riddance. He simply was not right for that person so go find someone else.
However…sleeping with four dogs on the bed is a bit much!!! My wife allows one and my daughters allow my other dog to stay in their rooms.
By Leon Phelps
October 30, 2008 1:25 PM | Link to this
I just returned from lunch where the topic of having kids came up… how about this chick said ” I do not want to have kids, but I am thinking about getting a dog soon” I had to just shake my head.
By AmazonRed
October 30, 2008 1:26 PM | Link to this
It’s like having a headache, taking something for it and not knowing the very moment it stopped hurting. All you know is you eventually realize the headache is gone. That’s how it is.
Raqi, that is a great analogy. Thanks.
I’m just grateful the man doesn’t snore or toss and turn. It’s quiet peaceful once the tv is off. LOL
By Jadrien
October 30, 2008 1:30 PM | Link to this
M’Karyl, dang off the same plate?! She must have REALLY loved those cats. I couldn’t have done it either. Before me and my girl would get a pet, we would just have to sit down first and talk about it, like what kind of things will be done and what will and will not be tolerated so that we could make sure that we agree on everything before we decided what to do.
AmazonRed, you know i had to come back. The weather is getting not so hot out here. Before it stayed between 110 and 120 degrees on a daily basis.
By AmazonRed
October 30, 2008 1:34 PM | Link to this
Yes because, well you are right. But know because this is my FIL brother who just happens to be my husband favorite uncle. So I must…am willing to do it for him.
Raqi, you’re the lady of the house so I know you will take care of family. This can’t be easy for any of you right now. I’m sure they would treat you the same if the shoe was on the other foot. It’s touching to see them traveling the miles to be there for you guys. Lean on each other.
I did have an overnight house guest last month, under better circumstances. I figured she just needed the room, since her purpose of her trip was not to see me. But she sho did “expect” a meal. We went out to dinner, but I did get in there and hook up breakfast.
By M'Karyl
October 30, 2008 1:39 PM | Link to this
@Jadrien
Dude, the chick had 9 cats (told me 3 before I moved in)…yes, they ate with her…but her behaviors with the animals as a emotional attachment is much like Dan was talking about when it comes to an unhealthy relationship bonding with pets…she neglected their health needs (kittens with worms)…she never bought enough cat food or cat litter…she could not adquately take care of them (or herself), but she could not let them go…that is where she channeled all of her emotional needs…into the cats…walked all over her food one night…she had company over for “dinner and such”…cats was in the kitchen stepping all over their food…told her about it, but they cooked and ate it anyway…that is when I think ppl have real problems with owner/pet relationships…there are some rather reasonable boundaries betwen humans and pets…the other stuff seems relative. in comparison to her behaviors…weird
By lurker #2
October 30, 2008 1:41 PM | Link to this
Beautiful Your 10:05
You’re about the biggest ignoramis on here. I see why ARed chop you at the knees at the sight of (reading) you. Why the heck you jump on here every daggone time someone voices their opinion? Topic change or just not in agreeance. Please. Stick to the airheadness you so often display when posting your random, out of the blue comments. Don’t try to go on the attack,k? You really look weak then. SMH. I know, all of those that pity you will now jump to your defense.
By Blow Me
October 30, 2008 1:43 PM | Link to this
Thanks * Dan* I needed that…sniff, sniff
By Jadrien
October 30, 2008 1:47 PM | Link to this
M’Karyl, it sounds like she needed counseling. Those are some serious issues. How long did you live with her before you moved out? Did she get better with that?
By Beautiful
October 30, 2008 1:52 PM | Link to this
look at lurker2 tryin to ctrl … alt … delete my azz off this bish! lol. hilarious.
i simply dont care what you think. hair flip
By AmazonRed
October 30, 2008 1:55 PM | Link to this
Before it stayed between 110 and 120 degrees on a daily basis.
Jadrien, pardon my french but SHYT! LOL. Y’all might as well be in hell. Same zip code and all.
Keep holding it down, cuz I sure couldn’t. I’d “turn gay” in a heartbeat and be discharged! LOL
By Chink
October 30, 2008 1:56 PM | Link to this
I now I am a little late but..Raqi I used to take over the counter sleeping pills because I couldnt sleep deeply…it seldom worked for me…
I still have the urge to look at my little girl every night and watch her..she is so precious to me!
Oh man I have slept with a man who can snore! Shoot it got so bad I was putting the pillow over my head in frustration!
By Leggs
October 30, 2008 1:58 PM | Link to this
Hey Jadrien, glad to see you’re back in this camp!
By Raqi
October 30, 2008 1:59 PM | Link to this
Amazon no doubt. And like I said earlier it will be nice having them in the house. However I will the only one getting up to go to work in the morning, so I have to be sure not to stay up too late. I don’t want to be rude but a sister gots to go to bed at a decent hour.
DLCAD: I work with a couple of people who come to work with cat/dog hair all over them. And they wonder why some people do not eat any of the dishes they bring to the office parties.
One pet peeve of mine is when you ride the car with someone that has a dog and the dog tries to climb all in you lap. One of my friends likes to ride her dog in the car, but knows I will opt to drive my own car rather than have a dog all up in my face and on my lap. Sometimes she remembers to bring the cage.
By Jadrien
October 30, 2008 2:05 PM | Link to this
LOL AmazonRed, it didn’t really bother me much. I just hate being cold. Besides, this is my third time out in the Middle East so i knew what the weather was like already. And to be out for being gay, you have to actually PROVE to them that you are gay. They won’t let you out just for saying it. LOL.
Hey Leggs, how you doing today? I had to come back, it’s too interesting on here and i enjoy talking to y’all.
By Blanca
October 30, 2008 2:06 PM | Link to this
Keep it Real Blanca since you finally got out of that loser relationship I have someone for you! Oh dear… ;)
By MELO
October 30, 2008 2:07 PM | Link to this
She looks like she could eat an ear of corn through a picket fence with those choppers. Didn’t she have a job with dental benefits, ever?
Red-nekkers are ripping into Michele Obama on that other blog!!
By AmazonRed
October 30, 2008 2:08 PM | Link to this
you have to actually PROVE to them that you are gay. They won’t let you out just for saying it. LOL.
Jadrien - Oh. There goes that plan then. LMAO!
My sister’s husband is a contract worker out there. I think he’s in Dubai though. I also know he was able to get her diamond wedding set on the cheap! She is blinged out! I might need a similar jewelry hook up.
By Beautiful
October 30, 2008 2:13 PM | Link to this
Sometimes she remembers to bring the cage.
the cage is a beautiful thing. my chewy is cage trained. all i say is the word in and he’ll head straight to it. and when he knows he did something bad, he’ll run and hide in the cage. i love it.
as for sleeping, i haven’t slept well since my babies were born. i can hear everything. i get up every night at about 2ish to check on them. i dont check if they’re breathing, lol, just making sure they are there.
By M'Karyl
October 30, 2008 2:14 PM | Link to this
@Jadrien
Less than 2 months…it ended one day when she (a white girl) called me a “trifling ngg b**ch…whupped her good (but tht is another story…lol)…naw, she probably still ain’t right…lol…that was almost 11 years ago…her issues needed more than therapy…
By Jadrien
October 30, 2008 2:17 PM | Link to this
AmazonRed, yeah Dubai is a nice place also. Jewelry is cheaper here but have to be careful where it’s bought from. There is this guy on the street that is always trying to sell me watches. He always come up talking about, “My friend, u want watch? I got rolexes for 10BD ($26.66).” I’m like, yeah right, u not selling no REAL rolex that cheap. But these dudes more persistent than Jehovah witnesses. You have to get to the point of almost punching them in the face before they understand no or else they will follow you all the way down the street trying to get you to buy a watch.
By koala
October 30, 2008 2:19 PM | Link to this
Raqi and Reed don’t even bother looking after their own breed — typical. So don’t have animals, because you can’t even be responsible with humans. Not surprising…..
By AmazonRed
October 30, 2008 2:20 PM | Link to this
M’Karyl, your life is not boring. LOL!
By MELO
October 30, 2008 2:20 PM | Link to this
They are family and are here because a family member is extremely ill
there u go! Spend that money on grocery and treat them good lady.
By The Truth
October 30, 2008 2:22 PM | Link to this
Ared you seem to have that Zen thing going on. I’ve assumed you’ve always had it. When I was younger I always had 10 things going on in my head that I needed to get done. I could never rest, even in my own skull. At some point I realized that 90% of the stuff I thought about wasn’t that important and the other 10% always got done so why sweat it. I went from running in the red to cruising in 4th gear and life is much better. I finally stopped and smelled the roses. Now everyday is geared toward the simple pleasures of life. Hearing my wittle Ared talk, hanging with friends or the dogs. Whatever I’m doing I try to enjoy it. But it wasn’t always this way.
Blow you can lay your head on my shoulder. Here’s a big blog hug
Steve great post.
By Jadrien
October 30, 2008 2:22 PM | Link to this
M’Karyl, whooo… glad to hear u put the smackdown on her for that. I know one of my female cousin’s wants to beat the hell out of my ex-wife for all the things she did to me. My ex-wife was filipina and got mad and called me the N-word also (not when i was around though). My cousin even wanted to go to the Philippines with me the last time i went, but i told her i couldn’t have her getting arrested in a foreign country. I got arrested there last year because of a story my ex told the police, but she can’t lie good at all and the policewoman ended up letting me go.
By M'Karyl
October 30, 2008 2:23 PM | Link to this
@Jadrien
You have to get to the point of almost punching them in the face before they understand no or else they will follow you all the way down the street trying to get you to buy a watch.
They sound like some of them bro’s hustling in the ATL…chase you to buy a CD…sumthin, sumthin…be downtown..get on the train…hustling and pressing…pressing and hustling…I wonder if they function under the premise that all Americans have frivilous disposable income…lol
By MELO
October 30, 2008 2:26 PM | Link to this
But these dudes more persistent than Jehovah witnesses
ahhhh.When they come to my house and im alone in the house on a sat aftrnoon,i sit right there on the couch,in plain sight as they peer thru the glass portion of the front door.And they ring the bell.I sit right there,watching my teli without giving them any acknwoledgement.And i do hear them when they say,* smebody sitting right there*.I dont flinch! They eventually go away.. Those leeches pizz my azz off!!
By Beautiful
October 30, 2008 2:27 PM | Link to this
Jadrien, M’Karyl sometimes a smackdown is necessary. lol. it’s the only way to get through to some ppl.
By Raqi
October 30, 2008 2:27 PM | Link to this
melo all I ask is give a sister more than a same day notice. That’s all.
Beautiful Yeah. Before I go to bed I will look in on them. Well him, now.
By Leggs
October 30, 2008 2:27 PM | Link to this
Ok, we got another one hooked only after one day blogging w/us. Truth did you give Jadrien his manual, vest, and full body armor?
Are we still talking about dogs cuz I have a question about a 22 magnum pug!
By Kym
October 30, 2008 2:27 PM | Link to this
Who the hell left the gate open? I think some the mofos up in here have split personalities or something. Who in the hell is koala?
By AmazonRed
October 30, 2008 2:29 PM | Link to this
Whatever I’m doing I try to enjoy it.
Truth, that’s what it’s all about. :-)
LMAO @ the ARed part. You are a clown. LOL.
By M'Karyl
October 30, 2008 2:30 PM | Link to this
@ARed
Chirl…even I am going to enjoy reading the book…lmao…the plots are full in intrigue, drama, trauma, deceipt, back-stabbing, lies…almost like a day on any judge Show…lol…but in my case, I am always the defendent…lol…the ATL was a wild ride.
@Jadrien
Uh-huh…and walked with it because of something called a fighting words defense in GA for misdeamnor battery…opprobrious langauge…I wore that out in the GA…lol
By Leggs
October 30, 2008 2:32 PM | Link to this
BlowMe, what’s up chica? {{{MUAH}}}!
By Jadrien
October 30, 2008 2:32 PM | Link to this
LOL M’Karyl, you’re right. Most people overseas look at music videos and think all Americans are like that, like we all just balling or something. I be quick to let them know that ain’t me.
MELO, i know what u mean. I used to do the same thing when i still at home. I used to hear them through the door also talking about they know somebody home. I would just turn the tv up louder. One day they caught me when i was outside and tried to talk to me, i just looked at them like i didn’t know what they were talking about until they left.
By Satoria Lynn
October 30, 2008 2:33 PM | Link to this
@Koala & LurkerTwo
Really. What are you talking about?
By M'Karyl
October 30, 2008 2:37 PM | Link to this
@Jadrien
Imagine that…being deceived by the product of media propaganda…lol…they just send different packages of USA overseas than we get here…for sure.
By Satoria Lynn
October 30, 2008 2:38 PM | Link to this
You use fake names to post your opinion. How stupid is that?
By Jadrien
October 30, 2008 2:40 PM | Link to this
Beautiful, totally agree.
M’Karyl, i wish they had a fighting words defense in the military because a lot of people like hiding behind their rank here and feel that they can just say whatever they like. Then complain to my supervisors because i don’t let them treat me however they want. I don’t know who they think i am, but i wasn’t raised that way. I got respect for everyone until they disrespect me.
By Beautiful
October 30, 2008 2:41 PM | Link to this
I used to hear them through the door also talking about they know somebody home. I would just turn the tv up louder.
fun-knee!
By Blanca
October 30, 2008 2:46 PM | Link to this
Riz However - in the future it might be best to limit topics like these since it creates a big culture gap that will alienate a percentage of your readers. Maybe it’s because I’m rocked with the worst headcold ever, but what?
By MELO
October 30, 2008 2:51 PM | Link to this
Raqi u are such wify material and i comment u.Everyday on the blog,u sure bring it.I hope it rubs on some of them sisters here.And im sure ur husband is proud of u.
By M'Karyl
October 30, 2008 2:51 PM | Link to this
@Jadrien
Apparently, this statute was put on the books in the mid to late 60’s…post-Jim Crow…imagine that…needing to have a fighting words defense and such…lol…but yeah, ppl will abuse their authority or sense of havng the control position to mistreat other ppl…been there, done that…not a right way of thinking, IMO.
By AmazonRed
October 30, 2008 2:53 PM | Link to this
Blanca, there is nothing wrong with today’s topic. Don’t second guess yourself.
Hope you feel better.
By Raqi
October 30, 2008 2:53 PM | Link to this
I have some Godiva chocolate, who wants a piece?
By Wise Diva
October 30, 2008 2:58 PM | Link to this
I concur, there is nothing wrong with the topic today, some people on the blog can become a tad narcissistic at times. Some think that every single thing that does not apply to them personally is not valid or worth discussion. I think that saying she “alienated” people with a topic selection is a bit of a stretch in my opinion, it’s not THAT serious is it? goodness LOL Some of ya’ll need to get over yourselves.
By M'Karyl
October 30, 2008 3:00 PM | Link to this
Any given topic on any given day is apt to alienate SOMEBODY…imagine that…duh!!!!…if the ish of the day ain’t making your baby kick…rock it on another blog…lol
By Raqi
October 30, 2008 3:02 PM | Link to this
melo I am a slamming girlfriend. I am still working on the wife thing. Just because I understand some things and situations, doesn’t necessarily mean that I am happy about it.
By Kym
October 30, 2008 3:02 PM | Link to this
How well would you trust a date? Not sure if this is a true story from the Tonight show but the image is funny.
Jay Leno went into the audience to find the most embarrassing first date that a woman ever had. The winner described her worst first date experience.
There was absolutely no question as to why her tale took the prize!
She said it was midwinter…Snowing and quite cold… and the guy had taken her skiing in the mountains outside Salt Lake City , Utah .
It was a day trip (no overnight). They were strangers, after all, and had never met before. The outing was fun but relatively uneventful until they were headed home late that afternoon.
They were driving back down the mountain, when she gradually began to realize that she should not have had that extra latte. They were about an hour away from anywhere with a rest room and in the middle of nowhere! Her companion suggested she try to hold it, which she did for a while. Unfortunately, because of the heavy snow and slow going,there came a point where she told him that he had better stop and let her go beside the road, or it would be the front seat of his car.
They stopped and she quickly crawled out beside the car,yanked her pants down and started. In the deep snow she didn’t have good footing, so she let her butt rest against the rear fender to steady herself. Her companion stood on the side of the car watching for traffic and indeed was a real gentleman and refrained from peeking. All she could think about was the relief she felt despite the rather embarrassing nature of the situation.
Upon finishing however, she soon became aware of another sensation. As she bent to pull up her pants, the young lady discovered her buttocks were firmly glued against the car’s fender.
Thoughts of tongues frozen to poles immediately came to mind as she attempted to disengage her flesh from the icy metal. It was quickly apparent that she had a brand new problem, due to the extreme cold.
Horrified by her plight and yet aware of the humor of the moment, she answered her date’s concerns about’ what is taking so long’ with a reply that indeed, she was ‘freezing her butt off’ and in need of some assistance!
He came around the car as she tried to cover herself with her sweater and then, as she looked imploringly into his eyes, he burst out laughing.
She too, got the giggles and when they finally managed to compose themselves, they assessed her dilemma. Obviously, as hysterical as the situation was, they also were faced with a real problem.
Both agreed it would take something hot to free her chilly cheeks from the grip of the icy metal! Thinking about what had gotten her into the predicament in the first place, both quickly realized that there was only one way to get her free. So, as she looked the other way, her first time date proceeded to unzip his pants and pee her butt off the fender.
As the audience screamed in laughter, she took the Tonight Show prize hands down. Or perhaps that should be ‘pants down.
Jay Leno’s comment…’This gives a whole new meaning to being p** off.’
Oh and how did the first date turn out? He became her husband and was sitting next to her on the Leno show!
By Wise Diva
October 30, 2008 3:03 PM | Link to this
cracking up @ M’Karyl, see? I need to be more succinct! Yea!! What M’Karyl said LOL!!
By Beautiful
October 30, 2008 3:04 PM | Link to this
melo can’t say the same for you! ha, got you back. lol.
By Jadrien
October 30, 2008 3:06 PM | Link to this
M’Karyl, i guess the people that abuse they power like that don’t have any confidence in themselves or don’t feel important enough.
By AmazonRed
October 30, 2008 3:09 PM | Link to this
Some think that every single thing that does not apply to them personally is not valid or worth discussion
WD, exactly. Now that I think about it I’ve never dated a guy who even owned a pet.
I can still play. LOL
By AmazonRed
October 30, 2008 3:12 PM | Link to this
can’t say the same for you! ha, got you back. lol
Only if you’re directing that at Raqi or Melo.
If not, you’re slow.
By Raqi
October 30, 2008 3:12 PM | Link to this
WiseDiva AND Blanca I have yet to understand why people feel the topics are not good ones just because we all don’t get together and sing Kumbayah while holding hands. We all have an opinion and preference and I assumed were allowed to speak it. Diversity is what makes the world go around. Just like one person has the right to like or prefer something, another person has that same right to not. We all have a right to say so…???
By MELO
October 30, 2008 3:12 PM | Link to this
I am still working on the wife thing i knw, this marriage thing is alwyas a wrk in progress.
melo can’t say the same for you! ha yes and no, thep part, be faithful to wife was in fine print on our marriage contract and i noticed that kinda late,Beautiful But unlike u quitter,my wife is staying!
By Beautiful
October 30, 2008 3:12 PM | Link to this
blanca, wise you guys rock this spot everyday! even though my reason for being here has changed, i still enjoy reading you guys daily.
her first time date proceeded to unzip his pants and pee her butt off the fender. ewwww! melo here’s something new to add to your bag of tricks.
By Jadrien
October 30, 2008 3:15 PM | Link to this
LOL Kym, it’s funny how some marriages start huh? That was a funny a$$ story.
By MELO
October 30, 2008 3:24 PM | Link to this
melo here’s something new to add to your bag of tricks u pining for dyckk? I knw if u were in GA,u would lick my dyckk without much asking.U havent been flucked in months,ur pudsy is so sore even when u wash it.
By GET OUT--LONG TIME LURKER
October 30, 2008 3:25 PM | Link to this
@ Wise Diva- Get over YOURSELF, We will probably not agree with some of your topics next week. So save the lip for them. I am sure we are gonna do at least 2 topic changes next week.
And besides, we are all grown and every one here is adding to the discussion. Whether or not you agree with it. You need to chill out! Seriously. Just because you dont agree with what was said…Doesn’t give you the right to say it’s not needed. Chill out. Step off your high horse pink lil pony…and relax.
Thanks and God speed
By Chink
October 30, 2008 3:25 PM | Link to this
Kym
That was such a good story..I hope its true!
By Beautiful
October 30, 2008 3:27 PM | Link to this
melo yes, i am a quitter. wink that was one of my proudest moments ever. i knew what i wanted in a man and he wasn’t it.
correct me if i’m wrong, your wife is settling. she’s comfortable and secure. she doesn’t want to lose that. to keep it, she knows she has no choice but to deal with you. and what’s sad it that she can have what she has now and more with someone else who loves and RESPECTS her as a woman, wife and mother.
By Staceye AKA Black Mamba
October 30, 2008 3:31 PM | Link to this
Dogs provide unconditional love. No quetions asked and no complaints offered Then Iguess we can no longer call men dogs huh? LOL
Important Info
Not sure how true or false this is…but you got some nuts out there that do not care. But you can never be too cautious:
A gang, The Bloods’ initiation is starting at midnight tonight. They are unsure of the locations but they are to kill 31 women by the time Halloween is over. So we all have to be careful…even in the daylight. What kind of craziness is this? Whether it’s true or false please be careful!
By Jadrien
October 30, 2008 3:36 PM | Link to this
Staceye, i hope it is not true. That is one of the main things messing our country up now. All that stupid, unneccessary foolishness that some people do like that because they have no life. The first part of your post was funny though.
By The real atlanta housewife
October 30, 2008 3:38 PM | Link to this
Today’s topic did suck. Wise Diva you seem mad bougie!
By Raqi
October 30, 2008 3:39 PM | Link to this
HoneyBaked sells prime rib and pork tenderloin now…I would have never thunk it.
By MELO
October 30, 2008 3:41 PM | Link to this
Im settling! But im happy to settle.I cant be chasing some utopia all this while.Lyfe is good,believe that.And i choose to fluck every day if i want.How about u? At 40 sme,guys are still putting u on rotation and midnite speed dial.
By MELO
October 30, 2008 3:45 PM | Link to this
but beautiful,jokes aside,ur ex was worse than a dog! Didnt u say he flucked some byatch on ur own matrimonial bed? Now thats some doddy bulshllzle.Just shows what kind of smelly,big and woozly pudsy u have.Have u had any luck learning the keggels exercise.That will make that thing tighter sme.I cant stand a fcking big ruggedy and too watery azz.
By Beautiful
October 30, 2008 3:53 PM | Link to this
Im settling! tell her this! i’m pretty sure she would love to know.
what a mean thing to say about your wife.
By Tazzee
October 30, 2008 3:55 PM | Link to this
That is one funny looking cat on the ajc.com front page.
By Beautiful
October 30, 2008 3:56 PM | Link to this
raqi we have been doing the honeybake thing for the last 10 years. every time i visit, they surprise me with something new.
By MELO
October 30, 2008 3:59 PM | Link to this
im talking to her right now.Are u talking to ur fwbs?
By Leggs
October 30, 2008 4:01 PM | Link to this
Beautiful, basically it was a compliment to his wife. He’s saying she could have done so much better, but she chose him.
By Raqi
October 30, 2008 4:02 PM | Link to this
Beautiful 10 years is about how long it has been since I personally bought anything from HB. I’m glad I have this certificate because it is right on time.
By Dan
October 30, 2008 4:04 PM | Link to this
@Staceye and all
There is not a significant enough Blood prescence in Atlanta for that story to be relevant.
Cali, Chi, NY, maybe. But not Atlanta.
For that to be a real concern, you’d have to see blood (and for that matter) Crip graffiti everywhere.
Don’t worry about it
By Wise Diva
October 30, 2008 4:04 PM | Link to this
Mad bougie as opposed to what/whom exactly? and why do you say that like it’s a bad thing, LOL
By MELO
October 30, 2008 4:05 PM | Link to this
i have often said in the past that my wife saved me,did u miss that honesty Beautiful?
By Dan
October 30, 2008 4:11 PM | Link to this
@WD
It is a bad thing.
But could you post the link to using the iPhone for to blog.
I was in the airport trying and it wasn’t working for your boy.
By mqew
October 30, 2008 4:14 PM | Link to this
HoneyBaked sells prime rib Raqi didn’t know that….
Jadrien I think you married the one woman in the entire world that can’t know how to lie well. LOL
j/k abc
By Wise Diva
October 30, 2008 4:14 PM | Link to this
The real atlanta housewife & GET OUT—LONG TIME LURKER uh, ok..of course you can comment and opine/whine about not liking the topic! Feel free to do so. I can disagree and state otherwise. I simply stated my opinion and I stand by it. Of course next week could bring MORE topics that won’t appeal to everyone, it’s kind of how it works, you know? I am ok with that too. I just look forward to the blog comments and being a part of the forum/blog community. I like to contribute to it, what about you?
By AmazonRed
October 30, 2008 4:15 PM | Link to this
and why do you say that like it’s a bad thing, LOL
LOL. Good point WD hair flip
By Blow Me
October 30, 2008 4:18 PM | Link to this
Melo You a trip!
By Beautiful
October 30, 2008 4:18 PM | Link to this
melo nope, i remember. you should choose another word besides settling. she deserves more than that.
By Wise Diva
October 30, 2008 4:19 PM | Link to this
@Dan, really? you should be able to pull up the blog on the Safari browser/app
By MELO
October 30, 2008 4:30 PM | Link to this
she deserves more than that i spoil my wife and she spoils me too.Im sure if i fluck u and tell her,she may forgive me.U want us to try it?? settling,in zulu **mina khutanda?
Where is Cee today?
By Dan
October 30, 2008 4:33 PM | Link to this
I couldn’t get to the ajc homepage, it kept giving me some “mobile version” mess.
Even then, I tried the Access Atlanta page, nothing.
I guess you and Tazz are special
It’s gender bias I tell ya!…
By Beautiful
October 30, 2008 4:38 PM | Link to this
melo darling, it’s all good. but the arrangement y’all got going over there is phucked!
i wonder if she knows about this arrangement. hmmm.
what’s her number? i needs to talk to my homegurl. lol. fill her in on some thangs.
By The Truth
October 30, 2008 4:39 PM | Link to this
Please tell me there’s no trick or treating tonight? I’m not in the mood for that ish.
By Leggs
October 30, 2008 4:43 PM | Link to this
No, there shouldn’t be any tonight. No one better knock on my door tonight!
By MELO
October 30, 2008 4:47 PM | Link to this
phucked! its ur head which is phucked.Ever since ur ex phucked women on ur bed in ur house,u have never been the same.U see all men and all relationships thru the prism of ur failed marriage.There is no humor,comedy or joy in ur lyfe.U are sick and need help.I wld not phuck u even if u paid me!
By Blow Me
October 30, 2008 4:48 PM | Link to this
Oh Truth don’t be a grinch..be in good spirits with the Trick or Treaters! Come on now!
By Staceye AKA Black Mamba
October 30, 2008 4:48 PM | Link to this
Dan yeah I know about it from back home…Bloods and Latin Kings are everywhere. But you can never be to careful. I just wanted to put it out there just in case.
By Tazzee
October 30, 2008 4:51 PM | Link to this
Dan I had the MIA page saved in my favorites so when I synched it automatically copied over to my iPhone. Try emailing the link to MIA to yourself and access it from there.
By Beautiful
October 30, 2008 4:51 PM | Link to this
no, not tonight truth. lol.
By AmazonRed
October 30, 2008 4:52 PM | Link to this
melo, she was never married. Don’t believe the hype.
By MELO
October 30, 2008 4:53 PM | Link to this
good nite pples!!
By Wise Diva
October 30, 2008 4:55 PM | Link to this
Dan, that’s very strange, I guess, email the blog’s link to yourself and click on it from there, then bookmark the site
By Leggs
October 30, 2008 4:57 PM | Link to this
Good night everyone!
Trust your instincts.Intuition doesnt lie. NEVER!!!
Hey, w/HDTV coming in February 2009, I’ll have more antennas to loan out…keep them up, keep them up!
By Beautiful
October 30, 2008 4:58 PM | Link to this
melo no, i’m not the same. i’m smarter, my eyes are wide open and i don’t take no ones shyt because of it.
oh, btw … i got RW on the line. wanna say hi? lol.
hi staceye!
By melodie
October 30, 2008 4:59 PM | Link to this
Lurker If you want to get rid of the “cute little mouse” get a cat. Or even a dog, my daughter’s Jack Russell used to kill any mouse that got into her house.
I do not put my pet’s above my husband, but if he had not accepted the fact that I would always have a cat there would not have been a second date.
By lurker #2
October 30, 2008 4:59 PM | Link to this
Ummmm Satoria Lynn your 2:38..make you look stupid…every name on here is a fake name for that matter. Really, mine fits me probably more accurate than anyone else moniker…fake moniker is redundant. I am a lurker, hence the name. If Satoria Lynn is your real name, you’re one of the few. Let’s see ARed, Raqi, SexyCool, Melo, Truth, Longtime Lurker, Leggs, Blow Me, 2CPTG Need I go on..I believe all these are not these persons birth given names. Maybe the names can be associated with the person but fake names non the less. Now who is stupid?
By Satoria Lynn
October 30, 2008 5:06 PM | Link to this
Heffa you know what I mean.
By Kym
October 31, 2008 9:02 AM | Link to this
I see the bootleg blog is open today.
By Raqi
October 31, 2008 9:10 AM | Link to this
LOL Kym I was actually looking forward to some funny fright date stories today to keep me awake. I am soooooo sleepy.
By Pamela
October 31, 2008 9:20 AM | Link to this
I have been married to my husband for over 20 years. I realized that he was the RIGHT man for me when I saw him making a huge effort to become friends with my 2 cats. Anyone person who asked someone to “get rid” of their pet is the wrong person. My advice is to drop them ASAP and move on.
By Kym
October 31, 2008 9:26 AM | Link to this
Me too. I leave at noon today. So…I have 2 and a half hours and counting.