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AJC.com > Living > Blog > Archives > 2008 > September > 11 > Entry
DEL.ICIO.USLove Lockdown
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
I watched the MTV Video Music Awards that I Tivo’d and I could not stop watching Kanye West’s performance. He premiered his new song, Love Lockdown, and actually sang the entire song, no rapping. If you know anything about hip hop music, when a artist like Kanye West sings about love, uh, there is definitely meaning behind it.
Music critics have been saying, this song was personal and after reading over the lyrics, I have to agree. I think it reflects some of the emotions men go through when they are having woman problems.
A man’s elusive thoughts and feelings when he is going through “woman problems” are rarely displayed openly. Needless to say, I love this song because it’s honest and thought-provoking. I think the lyrics could be insightful for women.
I’m not lovin you, the way I wanted to
What I had to do, had to run from you
Ladies, have you ever started a relationship with a guy, got close, and then he got spooked? Even though men realize this is happening, they can have a hard time actually talking about. Sometimes, they decide to grab their Nikes or Timberlands and hit the ground running because they aren’t ready for that level of intimacy yet.
It’s annoying, I know, but they are just as frustrated. Remember this ladies, before you get the urge to destroy his property after a disappearing act. Guys, what causes you to get spooked? If you know that you are not ready to have a meaningful relationship, do you let the woman know upfront? What happens when you think you are ready but have a change of heart? How do you handle it?
See I wanna move, but can’t escape from you
So I keep it low, keep a secret code
Ahh yes, the oh so lovely secret code. Guys, do you think you keep a secret code when it comes to your heart? What should a woman do when she discovers that her man has his heart/love on lockdown? Ladies, how have you handled dating Mr. Love Lockdown?
The song ends with: You keep ya love locked down, you lose.
How is that for a big finish? When you run, hide, and evade love, you are taking a risk on missing one of the greatest experiences in life.
What do you think about the song? Have you heard any other love songs lately that precisely captures your current dating situation?
Happy Thursday!
Permalink | Comments (312) | Post your comment | Categories: Matters of the Heart
Comments
By wRENN
September 11, 2008 8:24 AM | Link to this
Open door, look in…helloooooo (echo) anybody in here…lol
Good morning everybody…when love is good, it’s good, but when it’s bad, it’s bad and it hurts…
Like Whitney Houston said in Waiting to Exhale, somebody had to go through this ish in order to write these songs…
Everybody says they want happiness but I’ve found that when things are going fine and you are getting closer, men always tend to run a little faster than women because we run too…So with that said, What’s love got to do with? Relationships nowadays are more about what can you do for me, not how much love we have because love don’t pay the bills!
By SlimOne
September 11, 2008 8:24 AM | Link to this
Morning Only 2 days left…
OMFG! This song totally describes my most recent situation almost to a tee. So after reading the lyrics, its like how do you get past that…Fellas??
By SlimOne
September 11, 2008 8:29 AM | Link to this
Morning Only 2 days left…
OMFG! This song totally describes my most recent situation almost to a tee. So after reading the lyrics, its like how do you get past that…Fellas??
By QC
September 11, 2008 8:47 AM | Link to this
Morning Bloggers..Slim 1 you’re going to be just fine, you’re in my prayers so keep looking up for God’s Blessings to come down. Have a great day all =)
By SlimOne
September 11, 2008 9:06 AM | Link to this
QC I’m in good spirits today…one of my accounts just sent me over a package of treats as a going away gift & appreciation of my hard work. Just like i told a fellow blogger yesterday, God is merely pruning my limbs back so I can come back bigger, better & more fruitful.
Today is anniversary of 9/11
I had an oppurtunity to fly to New York shortly after that happened and visited Ground Zero. You could smell the ash all the way in the subway. When we got off the train onto the streets, they were still spraying the area down daily to keep soot & ash from being so bad. But as you walked ask flew in your eyes, you could see the destroyed store fronts, broken glass..etc. Then when we reached the area all you saw were large amounts of Missing posters for loved ones..flowers, teddy bears, candles, letters piled up. And the mood was so solemn..folks were not even speaking…just walking in amazement at the vast destruction that on our own soil…bulldozers going through the rebble…It’s definitely an experience I’ll keep with me always.
By SlimOne
September 11, 2008 9:11 AM | Link to this
QC I’m in good spirits today…one of my accounts just sent me over a package of treats as a going away gift & appreciation of my hard work. Just like i told a fellow blogger yesterday, God is merely pruning my limbs back so I can come back bigger, better & more fruitful.
Today is anniversary of 9/11
I had an oppurtunity to fly to New York shortly after that happened and visited Ground Zero. You could smell the ash all the way in the subway. When we got off the train onto the streets, they were still spraying the area down daily to keep soot & ash from being so bad. But as you walked ask flew in your eyes, you could see the destroyed store fronts, broken glass..etc. Then when we reached the area all you saw were large amounts of Missing posters for loved ones..flowers, teddy bears, candles, letters piled up. And the mood was so solemn..folks were not even speaking…just walking in amazement at the vast destruction that on our own soil…bulldozers going through the rebble…It’s definitely an experience I’ll keep with me always.
By China Doll
September 11, 2008 9:18 AM | Link to this
Morning All,
As I read over the lyrics to Kayne’s song…that type of vulnerablity is what I crave. It’s OK men to let us know how you REALLY feel.
By Beautiful
September 11, 2008 9:18 AM | Link to this
hi wRENN & qc! i can’t sleep
slim i’m not going to ask how ya doin’, cause i know the feeling. i’m wishing nothing but great success for you. keep it positive 100% and whatever you put your mind to keep at it and it shall be yours. for example, i set a goal to find a job in 30 days. i hustled so hard in that time, that at the end and beyond 30 days, ppl were still knockin’ on my door. take a week off, set a goal next monday and do the dayum thang! good luck
By i'm swiss
September 11, 2008 9:21 AM | Link to this
Hmmm… Honestly, to me “getting spooked” == “just not that into you.” It’s along the same lines as the “it’s not you, it’s me” routine. No, actually, it’s not me — it’s you & I just don’t want you.
I’m ashamed to say I’ve pulled this “spooked” disappearing act in my younger days, and it really just boiled down to me not wanting to be with the girl, but being too much of a chicken-sh!t to actually tell her so. So I just made myself scarce. Not proud of that, but it’s the truth.
By SlimOne
September 11, 2008 9:24 AM | Link to this
I promise I’m not posting twice…it’s the ghost in my machine
Beautiful Yeah I plan on taking me a week to clear my head & get refreshed before I really dig my heels in.
Slim now doing cartwheels down the aisles of this almost empty office
By Beautiful
September 11, 2008 9:28 AM | Link to this
9/11 i spent 3 hours of my weekend watching footage on sunday. after all this time, i’m still numb.
did you guys hear the story about the 2 extra stair wells? i’m alittle pyssed and irritated that ppl who worked in the twin towers only knew of ONE stair well. the other 2 were not taken advantage of and more ppl could have been saved. also, the handicapped who were left on the 20th floor because the rule was to stay and someone will come and rescue you … straight bs! all of those healthy men passing them by could have carried those poor ppl out. smh.
By East Point's Own
September 11, 2008 9:35 AM | Link to this
I can say that I have never been spooked by the possibility of getting closer to a woman, I welcome that closeness. I never really understood why some folks (men and women) run from a good potential mate. I do agree 100% with the statement about if you keep ya love locked down ya lose. That kind of ties in to what I was saying yesterday. I am a believer in letting what’s going to happen, happen without fighting it, for the good or bad.
Now as far as disappearing acts go, my opinion on that at least from a man’s perspective is that there was some trait or action that causes the dude to have a second though about going any further and perhaps he was too afraid of hurting a woman’s feelings or trying to avoid a confrontation so he just cut and run. You may think he was running from love, but really he was running from yo crazy arse… LoL
By Beautiful
September 11, 2008 9:37 AM | Link to this
China Doll that type of vulnerablity is what I crave.
me too, but not really. i understand a man now more than ever. i asked my bestfriend just last night … why do we question what men do? we really need to leave them be with their emotions and let them do what their best at doing.
By MLL
September 11, 2008 9:38 AM | Link to this
That’s all I’ve been meeting are men with their hearr/love on lockdown. I must admit I was the same way for a long time, but as my heart healed, I begin to open it up to accepting love again.
how have you handled dating Mr. Love Lockdown? I don’t date them. If I get a code or clue that he’s not emotionally ready for dating saying negative things about women and such, I leave him alone, I can’t force/bribe/trick a man to be in something he just isn’t ready for.
By nr
September 11, 2008 9:42 AM | Link to this
brothers are so scared of intimacy…i feel that I times men have this fear of failure , so they retreat, move around and build walls As if the biggest betrayal to themselves is to reveal something or an inch about how they truly feel about a person …but this is how we have been conditioned in this society…what a waste !!!
By QC
September 11, 2008 9:43 AM | Link to this
Hey Beautiful I’m too sleepy this morning, but i do feel this 24oz Mountain Dew kicking in…finally!
By Raqi
September 11, 2008 9:46 AM | Link to this
I think guys get spooked when they don’t want to yield to the responsibility that comes with being in a committed relationship.
I don’t think they fear love. I think they fear a so called “lose of freedom”. Which is a misconception.
By AmazonRed
September 11, 2008 9:49 AM | Link to this
Ladies, have you ever started a relationship with a guy, got close, and then he got spooked?
Yup.
Good morning everyone.
By Beautiful
September 11, 2008 9:53 AM | Link to this
I think guys get spooked when they don’t want to yield to the responsibility that comes with being in a committed relationship.
yes, and i welcome this believe it or not. i want his heart and soul to be involved once we decide to go for it. like i’ve said and done a million times, i’m willing to let you go etc etc.
By Leggs
September 11, 2008 9:54 AM | Link to this
Good morning. I’ve spooked 2 guys that I know of. One I had to laugh at because he was into me and so afraid of my strength. The only one got spooked and left me high and drive. That hurt was so overwhelming wasn’t sure I could find way back. Of course, time heals all wounds!
Hey, a really good friend of mine called last night telling me about his marriage troubles. I listened and I listened. After a while he wanted to know if he could come over this weekend. I had to shut that down quickly. I know there’s 3 sides to a story, and I don’t plan on being in the middle. Ending the conversation with “talk these things out with your wife. Perhaps you 2 need to go to counseling.” I’m not even going down that avenue!
By ATL Guy
September 11, 2008 9:55 AM | Link to this
Been 7 Years and it still affects me on this day. Always remember the ones lost. While in NYC went to the Twin Towers Site in 2004…really puts many things into perspective
On the Topic I’ve been on a first date with a girl talking about getting closer to 30 and how she needs to basically get a guy on lock down before its too late. On a first date I’m looking at her like she’s F’ing bananas. I don’t need to hear this, we just met! Females, quit forcing it, let things evolve! It freaks us guys out
By MLL
September 11, 2008 9:58 AM | Link to this
You have a point there Raqi, most men don’t want to be accountible, avaliable or have open communication which these three things are very important in establishing and keeping a relationship.
By East Point's Own
September 11, 2008 10:01 AM | Link to this
Raqi the loss of freedom is not completely a misconception… There are a few things that men do and a few places that men go that most women have problems with when a relationship starts… it could be something as simple as watching a game on Sunday at Hooters, going to a strip club with the guys once in a while, or just hanging out with our single guy friends. SOME women who are otherwise great women have issues with these things. But they fail to realize that if a person is going to cheat there is no stopping that, getting upset when we hang out in places where there are other women is not going to stop a guy from cheating as long as there are women in the workplace, grocery store, or the gas station…
And as far as having the heart on lock down/ putting walls up…. I think that’s a common phenomena with men and women these days, I can say that the last few women I dated all started out talking about how they did not want to be in a relationship at the time, but after 1-2 weeks suddenly they wanted to start having “the talks” but with me its too late by then, if you start out saying “no relationship” then that’s what you will get from me…. no relationship
By China Doll
September 11, 2008 10:02 AM | Link to this
Beautiful
I love the hardness and strenght of a man, but I would also like to see the softer side sometimes. Not like in a punkish way…just tenderness. Share some of your fears, disappointments, etc.
Once again, not a crybaby, punk or weak man, just a vulnerable man.
By SlimOne
September 11, 2008 10:09 AM | Link to this
Raqi I totally believe what you said is what was the case in my situation, unlike what i’m swiss stated. But you have to go on as stated in these lines:
No more wastein time, we cant wait for life
which is wastin time, wheres the finish line
By MLL
September 11, 2008 10:11 AM | Link to this
EPO maybe these ladies are going in with no expectations and then when they see where you’re coming from/going they changed their mind. I just don’t get the “no expectation” concept when it comes to begining a potential relationship. If you don’t have any expectations from t he begining how do you expect for it to go anywhere? I approach dating with the expectancy of it going from dating to relationship to matrimony. Just like I come to work expecting a paycheck for doing my job or when I get in my car I expect it to cranck and take me safely to my destination, I apporach dating the same way, with expectations.
By Beautiful
September 11, 2008 10:13 AM | Link to this
China Doll i would only want that if that’s who he is. i’m not willing to change the emotional person that i am, so i will accept him as is. BUT, every guy breaks down. you may get what your asking for when you least expect it.
not a crybaby, punk or weak man. i agree. imagine making love to this guy? who’s ridin’ who?
By wRENN
September 11, 2008 10:13 AM | Link to this
@Beautiful…what’s crackalackin?! and good morning to you…hope your day is awesome…
@SlimOne, everything will be fine…you will swing back in no time…keep yo head up…
I was in New York shortly after 9/11 as well and i was staying in Manhattan for some computer training for work…
I should have but didn’t visit Ground Zero because I didn’t want to remember the smell…I could smell is some from the hotel I was staying in…
That experience is something I will never forget…Matthew 28:20
Be blessed everyone as we take a moment of silent for those lost in that senseless tragedy…
I have no heard Kayne West’s song as of date but I am a fan of his so I will check it out Wise Diva, maybe even add it to my cd collection if it is warranted…
By wRENN
September 11, 2008 10:14 AM | Link to this
@Beautiful…what’s crackalackin?! and good morning to you…hope your day is awesome…
@SlimOne, everything will be fine…you will swing back in no time…keep yo head up…
I was in New York shortly after 9/11 as well and i was staying in Manhattan for some computer training for work…
I should have but didn’t visit Ground Zero because I didn’t want to remember the smell…I could smell is some from the hotel I was staying in…
That experience is something I will never forget…Matthew 28:20
Be blessed everyone as we take a moment of silent for those lost in that senseless tragedy…
I have not heard Kayne West’s song as of date but I am a fan of his so I will check it out Wise Diva, maybe even add it to my cd collection if it is warranted…
By wRENN
September 11, 2008 10:14 AM | Link to this
@Beautiful…what’s crackalackin?! and good morning to you…hope your day is awesome…
@SlimOne, everything will be fine…you will swing back in no time…keep yo head up…
I was in New York shortly after 9/11 as well and i was staying in Manhattan for some computer training for work…
I should have but didn’t visit Ground Zero because I didn’t want to remember the smell…I could smell is some from the hotel I was staying in…
That experience is something I will never forget…Matthew 28:20
Be blessed everyone as we take a moment of silent for those lost in that senseless tragedy…
I have not heard Kayne West’s song as of date but I am a fan of his so I will check it out Wise Diva, maybe even add it to my cd collection if it is warranted…
By East Point's Own
September 11, 2008 10:15 AM | Link to this
MLL as far as open communications go, I have not yet dated a woman who could communicate openly. Even my best relationships were filled with times where she thought I knew what she meant/wanted/was thinking. Men and women simply communicate and think differently… folks need to just come out and say in plain words what they think/feel/desire/like/dislike. if we could all do that while in a relationship all out lives would be much more simple and we would spend less time in a relationship with someone we are not really all that compatible with.
By MLL
September 11, 2008 10:25 AM | Link to this
I agree EPO we do need to be more open with what we want/need/desire but when you do that as in ATL Guys case you get looked at like you’re F bananas, sometimes it seems like a no win situation even though it doesn’t have to be that way.
By East Point's Own
September 11, 2008 10:31 AM | Link to this
MLL I agree I would not be dating if I did not expect something more to come of it… I can have plenty of fun with ladies without going on dates… so if I decide to actually take you out in public there must be some potential… I am almost back to where I was a few years ago when trying to actually take a woman out on a date was the furthest thing from my mind… I can have so much more fun if I spend all my money on ME instead of dividing it by 2…LoL
By ATL Guy
September 11, 2008 10:32 AM | Link to this
MLL Agreed. But time and place. First Date I don’t need to know how your envision your wedding or how many kids you want to have and what their names will be. Feel Me? Its wayyyyy too up front. Maybe attitudes are changing and thats the direction its going.
When I’m going on dates, its to have a great time with someone. It may or may not materialize into something in the future. I’m not going on dates to plan weddings or kids!!!
I understand we live in a society where time is of the essence and people rush into things. Hence why Divorce rate is so high in my opinion. Give it time…let things play out!
By Beautiful
September 11, 2008 10:34 AM | Link to this
On a first date I’m looking at her like she’s F’ing bananas. I don’t need to hear this, we just met! Females, quit forcing it, let things evolve! It freaks us guys out
yea, it does. i usually wait for the questions. my new friend has already hit me up!
By Bentley
September 11, 2008 10:34 AM | Link to this
The problem for men may be the way in which they love. Simply put, it’s more of a problem about being loving versus receiving love from an outside figure.
Those of you familiar with Eric Fromm’s “The Art of Loving” know exactly what I’m talking about because I paraphrased the opening pages of his classic book. And I’m not just referring to his work because I think it sounds cool, it’s because I was truly lost and losing due to love lockdown. I don’t expect everyone to be as moved by it as I was but men should really examine why it is we’re so f*ckin’ difficult to deal with when it comes to the emotions (loL).
By East Point's Own (will be Leon Phelps for the remainder of today)
September 11, 2008 10:37 AM | Link to this
MLL But you just have to do what you know/think is best… if the person you are with has a problem with that then you should know its time to cut and run. I try my very best to say what I mean and say how I feel, and it does cause problems because most folks are not used to that and in many cases they don’t understand what open communication means. So things don’t always work out, but that’s what is best since we would obviously have had lot of problems with our ideas related to communication.
By ATL Guy
September 11, 2008 10:38 AM | Link to this
Beautiful what new friend is this!? Someone you met at the grocery line that wanted to check out your produce section?
By The Truth
September 11, 2008 10:42 AM | Link to this
Morning folks.
For men relationships are like a mathematical equation. Alot of times they just don’t add up. We’re not real bright so we keep it simple. This chick wants this, that and the other and I just don’t see it. Poof.
Women throw into the equation how she “feels” but most guys don’t. They think in terms of what they have to give up vs. what they get. some of y’all got beat out by the Playstation. LOL
And guys aren’t afraid of intimacy. They simply stop at a certain point because to go further would cost them alot more than they feel it is worth.
To summarize once again:
Men want sex, companionship and fun. But mostly sex.
Women want kids, homes, vacations, faithfulness, love, family, emotional support, to have their deep rooted needs met.
Which seems less complicated to you? LOL
No matter what you think going solo for a man is a whole lot less complicated than being with a woman. Wash underarms, brush teeth, go. With a woman its like the above then, make sure wify feels needed, has her needs met, feels secure. Fugg it, I want a divorce. LOL
By SlimDiva
September 11, 2008 10:44 AM | Link to this
Good morning All!
Actually, I just lived this song. Things started smoothly. Suddenly, his behavior began to change. The frequent phone calls and surprise lunches decreased. When I asked what the problem was I was given ‘it’s not you, it’s me.’ We’re in our mid-40s…why are we going through this?
I began to pull back somewhat…he noticed. Soooo…this past weekend, I received a call informing me what the problem was. I told him that I have fears of falling in love too because of what I experienced with Mr. Navyman, but I won’t compare them. They are two different individuals.
Now that we have an understanding, we’re moving forward. Communication is key.
By SlimOne
September 11, 2008 10:46 AM | Link to this
Seems like folks, particularly women, who are in relationships tend to want to hook their single friends up all by themselves. Someone I know sees this dude everyday when she drops her kid off…thinks i’d be attracted to him and asks him if he’s single. When he says yes, she tells him how she thinks we should meet. LOL! I’ve never even seen this dude. I think that’s funny. She said she’ll keep hooking me up until i find one I want to keep. priceless
On Topic Why would a dude who’s been getting the g/f experience from someone or multiple chicks he’s just kicking it with, go the exclusive/relationship/committment route? We’re not in a Lease-to-Own society, We’re in a Lease-to-Lease society…but if you just so happen to end up with extra baggage, aka a kid..then and only then is there a possibility for some half-azzed committment or appearance of one.
By Leggs
September 11, 2008 10:50 AM | Link to this
Glad to read that SlimDiva! ^5
By SlimOne
September 11, 2008 10:51 AM | Link to this
Seems like folks, particularly women, who are in relationships tend to want to hook their single friends up all by themselves. Someone I know sees this dude everyday when she drops her kid off…thinks i’d be attracted to him and asks him if he’s single. When he says yes, she tells him how she thinks we should meet. LOL! I’ve never even seen this dude. I think that’s funny. She said she’ll keep hooking me up until i find one I want to keep. priceless
On Topic Why would a dude who’s been getting the g/f experience from someone or multiple chicks he’s just kicking it with, go the exclusive/relationship/committment route? We’re not in a Lease-to-Own society, We’re in a Lease-to-Lease society…but if you just so happen to end up with extra baggage, aka a kid..then and only then is there a possibility for some half-azzed committment or appearance of one.
By Beautiful
September 11, 2008 10:52 AM | Link to this
atl guy close! lol. i met him at the gym of all places. lol. we’ve been eyeing each other since i got back in june. i wanted to do the approach thing, but decided not to. i wanted to know if he was interested in me. and that was my only way of knowing for real.
By m'karyl
September 11, 2008 10:53 AM | Link to this
ATL Guy
Manana, me preguntaste si puedo hablar Espanol…lo he hablabado casi 33 anos desde que tenia quince anos de edad…les he ensenado gente a aprender ambos idiomas…he estudiado en los cursos mas advanzadas del lengua, cultura, historia… sobre todo del mundohispanico…le conozci mucho gente de los varios paises y cuando me hablan ellos…piensan que soy una latina porque de la manera me hablo el idioma…que puedo decir…soy muy lista…me entiendes?
By ATL Guy
September 11, 2008 10:54 AM | Link to this
SlimOne yeah I keep having my female friends trying to set me up with their single friends also. Its funny. Someone in the office wanted me to call the Radio Station to be Atlanta Bachelor competition or something. I’m like WTF! Haha!
By SlimOne
September 11, 2008 10:56 AM | Link to this
Seems like folks, particularly women, who are in relationships tend to want to hook their single friends up all by themselves. Someone I know sees this dude everyday when she drops her kid off…thinks i’d be attracted to him and asks him if he’s single. When he says yes, she tells him how she thinks we should meet. LOL! I’ve never even seen this dude. I think that’s funny. She said she’ll keep hooking me up until i find one I want to keep. priceless
On Topic Why would a dude who’s been getting the g/f experience from someone or multiple chicks he’s just kicking it with, go the exclusive/relationship/committment route? We’re not in a Lease-to-Own society, We’re in a Lease-to-Lease society…but if you just so happen to end up with extra baggage, aka a kid..then and only then is there a possibility for some half-azzed committment or appearance of one.
By Leon Phelps
September 11, 2008 10:57 AM | Link to this
The Truth I will take that one step further… As I have gotten older and had the opportunity to experience many more of the things the world has to offer… I have realized that I need a woman who can keep up. And frankly a lot of women just don’t have that much to offer. I am not one to require that a woman I date have a degree, own a home, make X amount of money per year… but she has to bring something to the table besides drama and a list of things she wants from a man. Whenever I get into a conversation with a young lady about what she wants from a man, I shut it down really quick when I ask “what can you offer to your man?” SO far I have not yet met woman who’s list of things she wanted was even close to matching the list of things she offers, in fact 9 times out of 10 folks don’t have an immediate answer. When I see that a young lady is not giving as much as she is taking its time for me to go… plain and simple. I need someone who will enhance my life not drain my energy/resources.
By Tazzee
September 11, 2008 10:58 AM | Link to this
Morning Folks!
Your topic is right on time Wise Diva because I’m sort of going through that right now. But it’s not a ‘love’ thing. This guy is truly afraid of getting close to someone because he fears getting hurt. It has nothing to do with him being into me because we’re not in a relationship or anything like that. But when he and I were talking this weekend, whenever I got ‘too close’ he would change the subject or shutdown.
So now I’m at a crossroads because I do care for this guy. Do I try to help him through his issues or do I just walk away?
Raqi my feeling are hurt…
SlimOne I lost your email address, can you send me an email - Tazzee@gmail.com
By MLL
September 11, 2008 10:58 AM | Link to this
ATL Guy atleast you knew her intentions straight with no chaser LOL…… since eventually she would want to get married and have a child(ren)
EPO cut and run is a bit too harsh don’t you think, I’d rather state our differences and walk away if there are no meeting of the minds.
By MLL
September 11, 2008 11:00 AM | Link to this
Hold up Truth I want sex, companionship and fun too! if I get all of that then the rest will surly fall into place!
By MLL
September 11, 2008 11:03 AM | Link to this
Okay nowSlimone kid(s) are NOT extra bagages
By AmazonRed
September 11, 2008 11:03 AM | Link to this
They think in terms of what they have to give up vs. what they get. some of y’all got beat out by the Playstation. LOL And guys aren’t afraid of intimacy. They simply stop at a certain point because to go further would cost them alot more than they feel it is worth.
Truth, glad you posted today. I’m in a “boys are stupid, throw rocks at them” type mood today, and this is a great shot of reality!
However, sometimes the girl gets stuck with the most complicated guy on the planet. You just want to shake em and say “Dude, lighten up! The whole world is not after your azz.”
By NEW-MELO
September 11, 2008 11:03 AM | Link to this
Men want sex, Women want kids, homes, vacations, faithfulness, love, family, emotional support, to have their deep rooted needs met.
U got it mayne..women’s brains are way ahead of men’s on this issue..women enter into a dating game with their expectations 4 notches up.If the guy is fine, he has a good job and making money and seems to have a good head on his shlders,they are already calling their girlfriends,telling them about hw many babies they think they will have when they snatch this guy.All the while,the guy is thinking what a great time he had on the date and he cant wait to get laid when it happens! By the time yu 2 are an item,the chic is thinking and coordinating the colors for their aprtment together.The guy meanwhile is just having fun and having a good time.By the time u are 6 mths in the relationship,the chic is seeing a wedding soon,the guy is saying well,she seems a good girl. And at nine months,the pressure is buidling from the chic,she more clingy,wants to be seen every day,* i want this,i want that*proly has diapers already boght and holding them at her aprtmernt and the guy is begining to sense smething is up.Thats when they say,fck it,this chic is crazy or sme,we having fun but she dont want me to even see my ppleo r my friends.ADIOS,BYE its not wrth it………!! The moral,ladies, have the patience to sense things and let him lead you on.iF U sense that he he taking more of u to his folks,his buddies and the pple he luvs most,thats ehen u know u proly the one and just slow dwn a shade,he will propose.The moment u go ahead of a guy,unless he lame,he will bolt.I will,if its me.Its the manly instinct.
By Leon Phelps
September 11, 2008 11:04 AM | Link to this
SlimOne Well the way I see it there are 2 reasons a dude would give up the GFE and go it solo with one lady. 1. At some point in most men’s lives a switch flips and we decide that living the life has gotten old, and we have had enough fun as a bachelor. Typically at this point most dudes are serious about being faithful. 2. Sometimes a guy just meets a woman and there is just something special enough about her that he no longer feels the need to mess with the other chicks… If neither of these things has happened what you have is a player… he has the main lady and a couple side dishes…
By Binford2k
September 11, 2008 11:04 AM | Link to this
The simple fact of the matter is that any two people in the world roll at a different pace.
Now men and women - that’s a whole ‘nother ball of wax. Women, tend to want to be emotionally invested before carnal encounters happen; and men usually don’t really develop an emotional tie until after said carnal encounters. The end game being is women are ready to engage the thrusters way before a man - and when that happens, you can expect a Carl Lewis-esque dash and long jump away from you.
SO my advice to the ladies: Let the man dictate the pace on the emotionbal part, so as not to spook him and run him off like in a bad Scooby Doo cartoon.
I think that is a cruel joke the Creator played on us. We’re constant amusement for it’s folly.
“Do or do not - there is no try.”
By m'karyl
September 11, 2008 11:04 AM | Link to this
I do not know if I can recall any men I have had interested in me becoming spooked, so to speak, and pulling a disappearing act…but I have noticed how much more differently they behave when their emotions become involved…it seems as if a more vunerable person emerges who seems uncertain about his emotional security…and the consequence seems to be more approach/avoidance type behavior patterns…attitudes may surface that convey fear of rejection issues…possessiveness issues…emotional vunerability issues…For me the moment these changes in behavior occur I start to distance myself and look more objectively at the person to see if it is even worth it to continue pursuing any interest.
By The Blogger formerly known as Kym
September 11, 2008 11:04 AM | Link to this
Good Morning All
I am not a Kanye fan so I have no clue or desire to hear anything he has to write or say. Yep I have dated Mr. Spooky. But I have also been Ms. Spooky. For me..I was comming out of the bad break up blues and the idea of getting close to someone was not even a topic of discussion.
Off-Topic(but ever present in our hearts and minds) My thoughts are with the love ones who lost family members and friends on 9-11-2001. Many blessings as you travel the path to healing. Much love to our military and their families your dedication is greatly appreciated.
Wayyyyyy Off-Topic-East Point(Leon Phelps) I think I know you.
By Beautiful
September 11, 2008 11:06 AM | Link to this
MLL at least you knew her intentions
folks must remember that you have to go through others to get to the ONE. she wasn’t the one … next!
By Raqi
September 11, 2008 11:07 AM | Link to this
We all know that while men say we women are complex they wouldn’t have us loving them the way that they are.
Men are simple? Yeah, but they like being needed and even liked being fussed over, in their layed back sort of way.
Now if we loved them as simple as they claim to be, no admiration, no flattery, they wouldn’t really care for it.
By Beautiful
September 11, 2008 11:08 AM | Link to this
say “Dude, lighten up! The whole world is not after your azz.”
i’m stealin’ this! lmfao.
By Wise Diva
September 11, 2008 11:10 AM | Link to this
Good morning! My thoughts and prayers go out to the family of those who were lost on September 11. I will never forget.
@wRenn he had the mp3 download available for free on his website, I think it is still on there
By m'karyl
September 11, 2008 11:11 AM | Link to this
@Truth*
Some real truth to what you say about what men want and what women want from relationships…it is just different…I also believe that men tend to be attachers, i.e. they tend to attach their physical, emotional and intimate needs to the object of their desire…whereas women tend to be *sharers…meaning that they tend to share themselves physically, emotionally and intimately with the object of their desire…I do no know whether this is a good or bad thing…I do not know if this is just how gender differences are conveyed or perceived…but the fact still seems to remain that men and women have different expectations, epxressions and objectives in pursuit of relationships or in relationships…but at this stage in my life I am content to sit the game out and let friendships be my primary goal.
By The Truth
September 11, 2008 11:12 AM | Link to this
Leon I asked blogsvill awhile back what a man gets out of marriage and the silence was eerie. I 100% agree that these chicks have a scroll of demands and offer nothing but their companionship. Wow, that’s worth me giving up a good life for. Chicks blame dudes being on the dl, unfaithful, not wanting to be responsible, etc… but as soon as a dude meets that woman who brings value then its a wrap. In conclusion I 100% cosign your cosign. LOL
MLL thats the thing, there is no “rest”. That’s it. If most women knew what a guy was thinking about when she goes over her demand sheet she would burn it. BTW, it seems all women are issued the same hostage demands. When me and my ex-wife were going to plays and travelling I would talk with women and they would say “I love that stuff”. I’d be like when was the last time you did it and they’d be like “never”. SMH Its all from the same script. LOL
By Leon Phelps
September 11, 2008 11:15 AM | Link to this
MLL You call it stay and state differences I call it cut and run… for me its the same thing, once i am not interested its over… Depending on how far into dating we are I would sit down and talk about whatever.. but the reality is that for me its a no-go situation as far as relationships go.. now if she still wants the wang then we can run it like that too, as long as she knows the wang does not and never will have the heart attached.
I dated a woman earlier this summer, and for the first 2-3 weeks she repeatedly said she absolutley did not want to be in a relationship… I told her from the start that if she was serious about that then that’s how it will be… well after about week 3 she asked basically why I was not developing feelings for her and I told her that that’s what she said she wanted.. and she attempted to convince me that she had changed her mind blah, blah, blah… but it was too late in the game the damage was done by then. The beginning of the relationship sets the tone for the first few months to a year those feelings you have after the first few dates are what you build that first year on since you have nothing else to go on really… and if we have no feelings after the first few dates you have nothing but some sweaty nights…
By SlimOne
September 11, 2008 11:18 AM | Link to this
Tazz You’ve got mail
Atl G There is a difference in a friend setting you up with another friend but when they setting you up with strangers….that seems a little cwazy dontcha think? I just hope that isn’t a relection on me being desperate or something. Afterall, I had no clue she was doing this.
Truth Your post sounds like it comes down to being lazy. Ya’ll want your lay-z boy chair, beer or liquor, flat screen, fav food and favorite fluck buddy. I thought loving was about what you can give to the other person, not just about what YOU can get out of the deal…Are LOVE Relationships becoming an endangered ideal?
By Raqi
September 11, 2008 11:18 AM | Link to this
he fears getting hurt
After hearing that statement and/or reading it a 1,001 times it is evident that the male heart is more vulnerable than female’s. Therefore making them the weaker vessel when it comes to emotions and relationships.
(Tazzee why? What did I do?)
By Dan
September 11, 2008 11:20 AM | Link to this
My thoughts:
I’ve pulled a vanishing act before, and for me it was about how i felt she was handling things pre-relationship.
At a point it’s like: okay, she’s cool, let’s make an assessment. Is she always late, is she controlling, is she about trying to take care of me, or is all about her, what are the qualities that I like about her, what are those that i don’t?
By the time you make that assessment, too many red flags equals puff the Magic Dragon and I’m gone.
By Beautiful
September 11, 2008 11:22 AM | Link to this
if a man doesn’t like/agree with his SO’s demand sheet … there’s the door. spare me the drama please. if you don’t like the challenges and benefits of a new job … it’s the same thing.
By MLL
September 11, 2008 11:24 AM | Link to this
LOL Truth hostage demands too funny…. some men just can’t take a woman that knows what she wants.
Leon there are some women confused women out there… As for the wang not having a heart, well that goes to say that some men use the wang’s size to get to the womans heart thinking the bigger it is the harder she’ll fall for em.
By m'karyl
September 11, 2008 11:24 AM | Link to this
I think that 9/11 is one of those indelibly etched moments in our conscious history…never will that moment nor the images seared into our thoughts be removed, forgotten or fading…we were all collectively traumatize by the what happened that day…I read each and evry life story printed in the NYT about each victim of that day…I needed to have names, faces, identity…I needed to humanize the heinous mass carnage by knowing who the ppl were and what their lives meant to others…how did they live, what did they do…who were they…I wanted to remember them as someone, not just a piece of collateral damage…so know I can carry their names in my heart…and when I see something, do something that reflects on who they were as a being…then I know that they will be with me in my heart forever.
By kimmie
September 11, 2008 11:25 AM | Link to this
Amred - I feel you on the mood. I’m not in a similiar mood, but this topic could contribute to one. I hate topics like this because it really becomes a “let’s bash the ladies, once again!” day. Do we do ANYTHING right?
I really could care less why some dudes do the disappearing act. IMO it basically boils down to him being a coward. There is a right and wrong way to talk to someone. If you’ve been a straight shooter with someone all along, you can gently tell them it’s just not working and go about your merry way. Of course feelings will be hurt, but that’s part of life. A woman can bring everything a man desires “to the table”, but in his mind if “he’s just not into her” its a wrap. Period. All this tired, wack mess you blog dudes tell us everyday that we “need” to be doing, gets real old and boring. That’s why some of you are displeased with the women you are meeting - are you offering up the same tired, wack mess every other dude is offering or are you one that stands out? What are you putting out there thats so exceptional that you expect should attract an exceptional woman?
By AmazonRed
September 11, 2008 11:27 AM | Link to this
i’m stealin’ this! lmfao.
Angie, I hope it works better for you than it did me! Long story short…wrong. thing. to. say. LOL!!!
By Leggs
September 11, 2008 11:27 AM | Link to this
For the life of me I cannot understand why some do this —-> well after about week 3 she asked basically why I was not developing feelings for her and I told her that that’s what she said she wanted. I too would look at her like she had 3 heads!
By MLL
September 11, 2008 11:27 AM | Link to this
I thought loving was about what you can give to the other person, not just about what YOU can get out of the deal Slimone for more than most it’s the latter. We have become conditioned to be an all about me generation. What’s the saying “u do u and Imma do me”
By m'karyl
September 11, 2008 11:28 AM | Link to this
@Raqi
After hearing that statement and/or reading it a 1,001 times it is evident that the male heart is more vulnerable than female’s. Therefore making them the weaker vessel when it comes to emotions and relationships.
This is what I have concluded after watching how so many men deal with rejection issues.
By Binford2k
September 11, 2008 11:29 AM | Link to this
Raqi: I think in the beginning a woman is more vulnerable, but in time the changes to the man.
All Ladies: When a man gets “complicated”, it’s usually because he has a reservation about you and he’s deciding whether that’s a deal breaker or not while not totally bailing on you. It creates space to make a decision. Unless the cat really is that complicated, in which case, you need to consider kickin his azz to the curb.
Slim: Love relationships aren’t in danger, but for men, that’s inclusive of certain things. If you’re in a relationship with a taker - that that is certainly a problem.
Lastly, Leon Phelps - yer not only on point, the name rocks the proverbial fro! :P
By Leon Phelps
September 11, 2008 11:29 AM | Link to this
The Blogger formerly known as Kym holla at me on my ficticious email account. zbody21@hotmail.com
MEN stop foolin yourselves with this notion that men have more carnal desires than women… Women do all the same isht we do, they just cover it up better…and most men are blind to the game that women are running on them…especially if the dude thinks he is really the one running game… that same chick you went out with for 3 months with before she gave up the draws was letting some other dude hit it on the first night.. and at least for that first month (maybe 2 months) of those three months you were waiting.. she had to take a month off to let it tighten up so you would believe her line… chicks are waaayy more sexual than the average dude. A female friend of mine gave me a test while having this discussion she said to me” stick your finger in your ear and rub it back and forth a few times….. and then tell me which one feels better, your finger or your ear” … that drove her point home.
By DasV
September 11, 2008 11:29 AM | Link to this
Dan i wonder at her being ‘cool’. what was it that made her cool and moved you to assess?…. that doesnt make sense to me.
SlimONE i agree it seems like the very definition of ‘lazy’.
theTruth when do you if ever while lounging at the house think about ‘us’ (women) and NOT in a sexual way?? i mean to ask are there times when you would like one of us around… and not for sex or to cook or clean? ever??!
and good morning good ppl
By Raqi
September 11, 2008 11:34 AM | Link to this
A lot of are saying that you did the disappearing act because the relationship wasn’t going well or you realized you didn’t like the woman’s true person. But my definition and understanding of getting “spooked” is because you fear what may happen to your inner self or heart because of the love that could possibly be about to take you over.
It has nothing to do with the woman, but more to do with how you feel or what you fear.
By ATL Guy
September 11, 2008 11:34 AM | Link to this
MKary entiendo…que bueno! Hablo Catalan / Espana espanol de Barcelona solomente’.
Beautiful I’ve been checking out this girl at the gym actually. Always see her there and she looks like she is checking me out too. Its subtle though. Everyone’s got IPODs on and all…its kinda hard to strike up random converstation on a weight machine or tredmill. See if she’s there tonight. A girl still looking that good after running 30 mins on a tredmill is a Great Thing!
How did you both approach eachother?
By AmazonRed
September 11, 2008 11:36 AM | Link to this
Unless the cat really is that complicated, in which case, you need to consider kickin his azz to the curb.
Binford, I definitely hear you. Question though, so does that mean complicated people should never be in relationships?
Some folks just have complicated lives. I’m convinced!
By Leon Phelps
September 11, 2008 11:39 AM | Link to this
Raqi I would not say that men are the weaker vessels per se. But I would say that on average it takes men longer to get to the point to be “in love” and when most men get to that point its a super tight bond, where as women may get to that mark first but a lot of dudes will do absolutely anything up to the point of death for their woman… But I don’t know that women’s bond goes quite so far in most cases. I mean dudes get their arses whooped and go to jail for years based on protecting their lady… I know that’s a bit extreme but the point is that men fall harder when they do fall in love and in a lot of cases it can cause serious mental damage when a love leaves a man, and often it really takes a months/years to recover completely.
By Dan
September 11, 2008 11:39 AM | Link to this
@MLL
It’s not about the list of “demands” from a male perspective. If I’m with someone, I’m about her needs and as many of her wants that I can provide.
For us it’s about reciprocity. If I’m giving you most, if not all, that you are demanding. Why is it that my needs aren’t considered?
And it ain’t just about sex, it’s about the other things. WD has stated that she’s just now learning that men like to feel pampered, wanted, and romanced. Pause for the ladies just now getting this Thing is only my woman will see that side of me.
And if there’s a situation where I feel like I’m not getting it…I’m gone.
By Beautiful
September 11, 2008 11:40 AM | Link to this
when you point the finger at someone else when a relationship fails or you feel you’re not getting what you want from the relationship, you have four fingers pointing back atchu!
By m'karyl
September 11, 2008 11:42 AM | Link to this
@ATL GUY
Yes, the Spanish spoken in Spain is quite a different dialect and such than the idiom spoken in other parts of the Mundohispanico…I sometimes make the analogy to Spain vs other Spanish speaking countries to Queen’s English vs other English speaking countries…the second person vous form plural, which is more formal, is used more often in Spain than in the diaspora countries.
By AmazonRed
September 11, 2008 11:44 AM | Link to this
Amred - I feel you on the mood.
Thank you kimmie! It’s funny that WiseDiva asked today of all days: Have you heard any other love songs lately that precisely captures your current dating situation?
If she had asked this yesterday, or recently, I would have said “Cater 2 U” by Destiny’s Child! Today I’m feeling Lauryn Hill’s “Ex Factor”
It could all be so simple But you’d rather make it hard Loving you is like a battle And we both end up with scars
Booo…LOL
By Dan
September 11, 2008 11:47 AM | Link to this
@Das
Cool as in, we can kick it.
Cool as in, we can hang.
Cool as in, she’s a woman, she carries herself well and she down enough to just hang.
Cool as in - I like being around her. Which is hard for a man to say..
By Raqi
September 11, 2008 11:49 AM | Link to this
Binford Further into the relationship is when it really matters.
By Leon Phelps
September 11, 2008 11:49 AM | Link to this
MLL any man ( read boy) who tries to use the wang to get love is a loser from the start..
kimmie Its not about us guys saying what women should be doing… I agree that if one party in a relationship is not feeling the other any longer its a wrap. But what I am saying is that a lot of folks men and women have high expectations of a mate, yet thay have no idea what they can offer to enhance their mate’s life. How can you expect to have a success ful relationship if all you know is what you want, and not what you can give? And what I am saying is that a lot of women (not all) start out in relationship by doing a lot of taking and very little giving. i am not trying to define “exceptional” but I do not think a woman is exceptional for being on an equal playing field. I don’t qualify for “exceptional” myself I just want to get at least as much out of a relationship as I put in.
By The Truth
September 11, 2008 11:49 AM | Link to this
MK you have something there about the attaching and sharing thing. That may be why women are more hurt because they feel they shared themselves with someone that just blank blank blank. Dudes say here’s my johnson and a portion of my feelings. If you do a good job with them I’ll give you more. If she bolo’s he pulls up stakes and looks for the next candidate.
On 911: While it was unfortunate it needed to happen. America has been doing much more to other countries forever and it was about time it came home. There’s always collateral damage in wars. Take a moment and research the devastation the CIA has done in other countries. Makes 911 seem like firecrckers. Btw, those who set that thing up have profited and are on to the next moneymaker. It’s not that I don’t care but it’s all a sham.
Slim it’s not lazy, its just men date you and wind up one day with a carload of kids and 12 errands to run. MOST never wanted that and human nature being what it is he’s looking for a way out. Don’t be to hard though, alot of women are realizing they’re shytty moms and bolting too. The job is high risk low reward. Personally I’d rather clean the septic system. Less liablilty.
Kimmie dont take it personal. Just cuase the guy didn’t see enough in you to want to tuff it out doesn’t mean your bad. Let me get this right. If he stays and deals with something he doesn’t want he’s a good man? If he bolts from something he doesn’t want he’s a coward? He just didn’t see it. It happens. Btw, email some of those naked lady kung fu videos I hear you have floating around. LOL
Leon I bow to you. 100% cosign that last one. When I came on here I said men smell dyck on these chicks and ev1 got upset. The thing is they think they can bone 50 guys( at night when it doesnt count) then when she meets “HIM” she’s all new again. “HIM” can smell unfresh meat and bolts. Everytime a cat enters these chicks they leave something in their emotional pool. Women think they can hide it but most guys can spot it a mile away. It’s a helluva balancing act for these women and some do better than others. I wish you were in here when the women were telling how few have EVER been in a relationship over a year. I was shocked and appalled. (sorry, I just wanted to use appalled)
By Tazzee
September 11, 2008 11:49 AM | Link to this
Raqi I didn’t get an invite…
SlimOne I hit you back.
By SlimOne
September 11, 2008 11:50 AM | Link to this
MLL About kids being extra baggage, I was just being facetious…if dudes think having a g/f is so much work, i was only implying that would be just as taxing of a responsibility as them. Not meant to offend…my sister is preggo now…found out Wednesday it’s a Girl!
Leon Your 11:04 is what i’ve heard about men. However, I can’t help but to get the immediate visual of a dude being all used up & ran through, balding & sporting a beer belly looking 8 months preggo, by the time he ready to chill out. Is he chilling out because he’s not as hot of a commodity as before & not getting the play he once did, or chillin out simply because he tired of chasing tail?
Binford
Let the man dictate the pace on the emotionbal part, so as not to spook him and run him off like in a bad Scooby Doo cartoon. So we are to fugg your brains out, do all the things that folks in a relationship do all the while keeping our feelings or desires of something of more substance under wraps until you feel we’re worth it enough to bring it up? How can a person be their true self if they are hiding it for fear of running you away?
By ATL Guy
September 11, 2008 11:50 AM | Link to this
SlimOne yeah it seems crazy when a friend sets you up with a complete stranger.
I’ve gone out on a date cause a friend gave me her friend’s number and said “call her! She will expect you to call!” so I’m like no big deal….always down for meeting new people. I’m not desperate, but to me it seemed interesting cause of the unknown factor. Met this girl, we talked for 5 hours straight, had sushi and went to a coffee house. She was cool. Found out she dated a guy I was friend’s with so that was our only date! But, it went well and I have no regrets taking that chance.
I’m so laid back and random with things I talk about, it would really have to take a lot to ruin the first date. I would be out to have a good time regardless if we hit it off or not, you know?
By Wise Diva
September 11, 2008 11:51 AM | Link to this
I hate topics like this because it really becomes a “let’s bash the ladies, once again!” day. Do we do ANYTHING right?
actually, it does not matter the topic selection, this seems to be a running theme, I feel you though
By Beautiful
September 11, 2008 11:52 AM | Link to this
atl guy we left at the same time. actually, he knows my routine. the treadmill is my last machine i work on. from there i go to the lockers to grab my bag. we talked at my car for 30 mins. awww. lol.
By DasV
September 11, 2008 11:52 AM | Link to this
cosign your 1124 MLL both to truth and leon aka eastpt
M’K your 9/11 post was beautiful. “humanize” the atrocity… didnt we all?? this is the first year that im not doing it cause it leaves me so emotionally drained.
It has nothing to do with the woman, but more to do with how you feel or what you fear. see! that is it right there in my opinion as well. thank you RAQI now i dont need the truth or dan to answer. i suspect that men start to assess after they realize that they falling for us. we know early on what we want and what we can deal with and if we are going to ‘fall’ for someone…. we are comfortable with the process of that happening. men have no clue, give it no thought, and are flat out shocked that they care for us more than they thought themselves capable of.
By Wise Diva
September 11, 2008 11:56 AM | Link to this
kimmie, also, I don’t take comments from a few men as the entire gospel of all men, and I definitely like that we have a mix of opinions. You never know a person’s history/past to put their comment in the right context either. I actually enjoy seeing the different perspectives, it’s enlightening, albeit frustrating to hear at times.
By jazzyone
September 11, 2008 11:57 AM | Link to this
Ill be honest I ran from my current man three year ago because I had feelings that i had never had before with him after just only a few weeks it scared me i ran and let something I knew could be so sweet and perfect for me go not wanting to go there emotionally or physically . I was terririfed, he moved away..
I contacted him 6 months ago not to get at him but he was on my heart so heavy i called to see if he was okay after searching for his number high and low..only to find it in one of my pold journals i had written in back then.. he immediatley moved back to GA and got another job in ATL and right back to me. it was interesting to lament on what we were both feelin at the time I did such a terrible thing walking away from something i wanted so much 3 years ago…now i can say we are in love met each others parents and family and things are so sweet.it was tough being vulnerable for both of us a few months ago. breaking thru the old hurts and ghosts ..we’ve managed to get thru it and love is so sweet we now look forward to peeling back the layers its a sort of excitement I can’t even explain..im truly in love with a beautiful ‘Mandingo’ I ran from some time ago…
By kimmie
September 11, 2008 12:02 PM | Link to this
Truth - You know I’ll always love you! Not taking it personal AT ALL! I KNOW what I have to offer and offer it freely to my very deserving SO, so it’s all good with me! I think you kinda misunderstood what I said. I’m not say anyone, man or woman, should tuff it out in a situation they are not happy with - lifes too short and hey, you’re dating, not married! What I call cowardly behavior is the disappearing act without explanation. What’s wrong with just saying “hey, it’s not working for me”? Got nothing to do with whether or not he’s a good man or not. I know asking for that is wishful thinking, but whatever!
Kung Fu Kimmie puts nothing on film! If you’re not my SO, you’ll just have to use your imagination!LOL
By m'karyl
September 11, 2008 12:05 PM | Link to this
@DasV
What I meant by humanize the tragedy it that I took the time to learn something about the ppl who died that day…the NYT printed a summarized life history for each person who lost their life on 9/11…it was important for me to be able to process the tragedy by doing this…I saw what everyone else saw…I was working at the CDC when it happened…we became ground zero in ATL for the emergency response…I saw the buildings fall…but what I never saw were the faces of the ppl…identity is very important to me…the whoness of a being…once I did that then I was able to move forward, not with the images of the Twin Towers falling, but faces with smiles, laughter and names…and that is what I choose to remember most…just like I pay homage to my ancestors with imagery of their existence…something to remember the person.
By Leon Phelps
September 11, 2008 12:05 PM | Link to this
SlimOne Well I just had my 10 year high school reunion last week and I did not take an official poll but my estimation is that there were more married male classmates than females. Even of my college buddies they are getting tied up and locked down at an increasing rate… I know for a fact that many of these dudes were hitting everything that smiled at them for a couple years at least.. but they turned the corner before they hit 30… so its not just the balding old men who flip the switch. I was almost there myself about 3 years ago… but that’s another story.
Wise Diva I don’t think any guy on the blog today has set out to bash any woman, but a couple women have taken our observations/comments a little too personally… like women used to say back in the 90’s about rap music… “if it doesn’t apply to you it should not make you upset” but I am not pointing any elbows… now where did I put my glass of Courvosier?
By Raqi
September 11, 2008 12:05 PM | Link to this
Oh Tazzee I’m sorry. I forget it was locked. It was only temporary to ward off some trolls that I had to delete.
By Mo (aka Moeisha)
September 11, 2008 12:12 PM | Link to this
Afternoon All!! Hope everyone is doing well!
Hadnt heard that Kanye song but may have to check it out!
Leon Phelps in regards to your 11:15, I had that happen with a guy. He and I both stated initially neither of us were looking for a relationship. 2months down the road he is upset that I am not treating him like my man, just sex. Had to tell him, WE set the tone, WE said the same thing and now you want to get brand new. We stopped dealing and he was upset that I wouldnt consider dating him. For what, you will never be anything other than sex. I dont understand how folks get the 2 mixed up, or how they want to change the game in the middle of it.
On 9/11: It hurts my heart ever year around this time.
By kimmie
September 11, 2008 12:14 PM | Link to this
Wise Diva - I agree and actually a lot of what the guys say does not surprise me. It just gets old sometimes, is all! I have a feeling a few talk major junk on blog but behave totally different in real life, too!LOL
I remember seeing on Oprah or one of the daytime talk shows these men that looked like they were 11 months pregnant, yet they wanted a supermodel! That’s what I think about when I hear some of these dudes moan - just what do YOU have to offer that’s at least comparable to what you what from her?
By Tazzee
September 11, 2008 12:15 PM | Link to this
jazzyone Awww - thank God for another chance. Enjoy your ‘Mandingo’
Raqi apology accepted. I know what you mean about the trolls.
By ATL Guy
September 11, 2008 12:16 PM | Link to this
Beautiful Thats cool! The gym I go to, people seem really in the zone or have the headphones in. Its a bit challenging to break the ice without coming across as a stalker. If we were walking out together…thats easier. If you do like spin classes, probably easier in there but I’m on the resistance machines and tredmill. I’m at the gym same time everyday so starting to see who’s on my schedule. I’ll let you know if I hit it off with this fine chick tonight!
MKary see, we speak a bit of Espanol and now we’re basically having Sangrias and sharing Tapas together!
By m'karyl
September 11, 2008 12:18 PM | Link to this
@Truth
Yeah…this is a conclusion I came to by way of observation and experience…dogs bark when they are hungry…cats meow…no pun intended…lol…but this is what I found to be a major difference in how some men and women process relationship exchanges…every rule has an exception…but I have still found this to be the main rule…and sometimes because of this differentiation of processing emotional relationship values there is an impasse in communication, both objectively and subjectively, between the ppl involved…well, it does also help that I have been reading the Ladies Home Journal’s Can This Relationship Be Saved articles for 40 years now…taught me a lot over the years.
By jazzyone
September 11, 2008 12:19 PM | Link to this
Hey Tazzee..I thnk him everyday (GOD), even on the days when I wanna strangle MANDINGO till hes swoozy..I love him even more. and that is unusual for me.
By Leggs
September 11, 2008 12:20 PM | Link to this
WOW Jazzyone, it was perfect and you ran anyway. Love is like a boomerang, if it’s meant to be it’ll come back to you. Glad you two are blissfully working through it all.
By DasV
September 11, 2008 12:21 PM | Link to this
M’K sorry. i wasn’t clear. i was only cosigning your process… it is what i think we all did… we read everything that we could about the people that were affected. i watched a portion of the movie made on flight 93…. only because it was a depiction based on family accounts of the ppl that died and what was overheard when some were able to call out….sigh i totally understood what you meant and thought you articulated what we all feel very well.
By m'karyl
September 11, 2008 12:22 PM | Link to this
ATL Guy
No offense intended, but most ppl on this blog know and have known that I am fluent in Spanish…late news…but I do make a mean Sangria…speaking of tapas…have you ever been to Fuego in Midtown…they have some good ones there…but nothing compares to the Spanish-Cuban restaurant I worked at named Babalu…used to be in downtown Decatur back in 1988 or so…Felix (the chef) had the fiercest tapas menu I have ever seen…especially the seafood…mayne I miss that…haven’t found a place here in South Hampton yet.
By Staceye AKA Black Mamba
September 11, 2008 12:29 PM | Link to this
Funny thing is that I have now swapped places. Now I would be that guy that is doing a Flo Jo! I don’t do anything remotely close to emotional connection. As long as we are cool, we can hang out, talk, etc…but when that lovey dovey stuff starts I must bolt! I have always had reservations about getting close. I have gotten hurt to much. But last year’s split was just the final straw. I have not been the same since. I don’t even look at guys in the same way anymore. Yes I am physical attracted to them…but that is where the firewall is drawn. I remember one time a few years back after a bad break up (he was liar). If I liked you and we had sex…I was no longer interested. I have a feeling I am about to be back on that kick.
Slim What is your email? I may know of some job opps for you.
Beautiful as a person who was there 9/11 and running for my life…nobody would have tried to carry anybody out of there. You would have too scared and trying to to get your own self to safety. Sad but true. I actually ran away..but did a complete circle. I knew where I was going but fear had me mind blown.
wRENN That smell made me sick. Even at home I could not get the stench out of my senses. I had night mares for months. I felt like I was in a Freedy Kruger movie. i was afraid to sleep because of what I saw.
M’Karyl & ATL Guy hable Dominicano! LOL
By Leggs
September 11, 2008 12:30 PM | Link to this
The rift has healed~
By kimmie
September 11, 2008 12:31 PM | Link to this
m’karyl I LOVE Can this relationship be saved! You do learn a lot!
By Leon Phelps
September 11, 2008 12:32 PM | Link to this
kimmie I can’t speak for anybody but myself but I don’t have a list of things I want from a woman beyond a few personality traits such as: she can’t be a complainer, has to be willing to learn about and experience new things, other than those 2 things the rest is more of a feel my way along type of deal. Every woman is different so I don’t make a list of things she must or be or have. Every woman I date starts at 100 points and then they go up or down from there. I like to keep things simple. So the fewer requirements I have the easier it is to get to know someone. But I have my things together, I am 28, educated, I can cook, I own property i , I travel… SO I already know that when I meet a woman who frowns at the thought of eating sushi, while she has never tried it or a woman who has never gone beyond the perimeter of I-285 and is proud of it, or a woman who has a college degree, a car, lives with her parents rent free and can’t keep her cell phone on because of her shopping habit… I don’t think any of those are going to develop into anything long term.
I have a close female friend who has a Master’s degree, lives with her parents (rent free), struggles to pay her credit card bills, car note, and cell phone billz and she has stated that she won’t take any man seriously about engagement unless the ring is x number of carats and from a short list of jewelers… and she was serious… I asked her what made her think she was deserving of a man who could afford such things and she really didn’t have an answer for that.. but folks think like that… and I don’t understand it.. and its not just her I have come across several folks like this men are no better I know some of us are challenged in certain areas but we still want a Halle Berry or a Beyonce.. but I think we all know that we will end up with a regular Sue or alone most likely. .
By AmazonRed
September 11, 2008 12:32 PM | Link to this
I wish you were in here when the women were telling how few have EVER been in a relationship over a year. I was shocked and appalled.
Truth, and why was that again? I’ve never been in a relationship more than 2 years. I think it’s better it that way than to stay in a relationship where you knew it wasn’t working but you stayed an extra 3 so you could say you had someone.
Most guys don’t need to date you for 5 years before realizing you’re the one who gets the ring. I recognize and act accordingly.
And the whole, women are hoes part is just hogwash. I just was not in the mood to refute that again!
By DasV
September 11, 2008 12:32 PM | Link to this
Dan… so basically, you start hanging out based solely on the physical??
i just think that you men wait to think after, not before… not saying that as women we arent prone to the same thing…but usually attached to us not thinking a thing through is a ‘viable’ (up for debate) reason… men just choose not to and have no reason for it
By SlimOne
September 11, 2008 12:32 PM | Link to this
Leon Yeah, I know they aren’t all balding and sportin preggo bellies…it was just the first thought that came to mind. So how old are you, if you don’t mind me asking?
By Wise Diva
September 11, 2008 12:33 PM | Link to this
aw man, the one day I feature Kanye’s song in my post, he goes and gets arrested. BOO!
By Dan
September 11, 2008 12:34 PM | Link to this
@WD
It’s not about blame who’s right, who’s wrong. It’s about men and women getting to understand each other from the inside out.
I now know that women are crazy, not just the ephemeral crazy but as has been admitted actual crazy.
For my part, at least, I’m about trying to inform certain actions and reactions that “men” have.
By m'karyl
September 11, 2008 12:34 PM | Link to this
@Dasv
You are fine sug…I thought that maybe I was not clear in how I worked through it…working at the CDC made it a more upclose and daily consequence for me because the ppl with whom I worked were some of the key players responding to the situation…so I had to not only experience it on that day…but I also had to work with it for many months after…but my counterparts at the CDC National Center of Environmental Health made me so proud by the way they immediately jumped into action…it gave me so much hope and a sense of security seeing the so eloquently take command and respond accordingly…my boss was in NY when the anthrax incident happened and Dan Rather put him in charge…I myself had to handle what appeared to be an anthrax tainted mail item.
By Dan
September 11, 2008 12:37 PM | Link to this
@Das
No. It’s not about the physical although, getting physical helps in the assessment..
It’s about the down time when we’re fully clothed and just talking…
Is she cool to hang out with in that time
By The Blogger formerly known as Kym
September 11, 2008 12:38 PM | Link to this
Leon Dude if it is fake why would I hit you up on it? You just read familiar to me. Does the phrase “See no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil” ring a bell with you?” If not then you are not the same guy.
By AmazonRed
September 11, 2008 12:39 PM | Link to this
jazzyone, I loved, loved, loved your story! I’m glad he had not moved on w/out you.
kimmie - I’m a chick that will pull a disappearing act in a minute. In my defense, I’ve usually been vocal about what the problem is. It’s usually after the offense is committed again that I just say, “I’m out.”
By Binford2k
September 11, 2008 12:39 PM | Link to this
AR If a complicated person can find someone who doesn’t mind the complications - they more power to them. But as I see it, people put up with entirely too much unnecessary complication and then complain about it. If you choose to deal with it THEN SUFFER in silence because it was your choice.
Raqi Further into the relationship is when it really matters. My point exactly.
Slim I am revising here. How about - don’t let the waters break the dam and flood the plains. Release a little at a time until it is safe to release more. Catch my drift? In the meantime, I’m not saying give a guy whatever he wants - I’m saying bridge the gap a couple feet on both sides at a time until you can meet in the middle. Don’t ever feel you’re not getting what you think/know you need or deserve - just realize Dogs bark and cats meow (That’s friggin classic!)
By m'karyl
September 11, 2008 12:40 PM | Link to this
I have a close female friend who has a Master’s degree, lives with her parents (rent free), struggles to pay her credit card bills, car note, and cell phone billz and she has stated that she won’t take any man seriously about engagement unless the ring is x number of carats and from a short list of jewelers… and she was serious
Then her high and mighty arse need to keep right on living at home with her parents because she has not grown up yet…just getting older…she does not want a man, she wants another support network like she has now…what a waste…how dae she think that someone else should support her lifestyle…obviously she has a problem with squandering her resources and with being trifling…any man who would have her is a fool looking to be had…truly…how foolish.
By AmazonRed
September 11, 2008 12:41 PM | Link to this
Even of my college buddies they are getting tied up and locked down at an increasing rate… I know for a fact that many of these dudes were hitting everything that smiled at them for a couple years at least
Leon, well of course more of your guys friends are getting married, simply because of that.
If a guy was “hittin everything” a woman will accept that as his past and find him marriage material anyway.
You guys certainly do not.
By Leon Phelps
September 11, 2008 12:41 PM | Link to this
SlimOne Just in case you are not reading all my posts this one is just for you.. I am 28.
By Chink
September 11, 2008 12:44 PM | Link to this
Afternoon,
Wise
Can’t it go both ways ..because most of the times I am the one spooked and involved with some emotional men….While I am known to have a tough exterior I do love hard when I do….not can’t live without you hard but I want to make you happy hard.
I tell them I will follow your lead I am not afraid to be committed to a dude at all ..I need only one guy…but I am afraid of losing me for a dude so I lay back and let him do his thing and eventually either he will lead us to victory or failure …
By Leon Phelps
September 11, 2008 12:46 PM | Link to this
off topic How does a person who is not, and has never been wealthy struggle to support a 7 and 8 year old on $2000 a month? she should have left that part out and just said she wants more money so she can live good too… LoL
By AmazonRed
September 11, 2008 12:47 PM | Link to this
But last year’s split was just the final straw. I have not been the same since. I don’t even look at guys in the same way anymore.
Uhh Staceye, were you keeping a relationship from us girl? I was blogging on here last year (maybe late last year) and you were on this “men suck” tip from my first day! When did this break up happen?
And I’m sorry it had to happen. I’m throwing rocks at boys today, so join me! LOL
By Dan
September 11, 2008 12:49 PM | Link to this
@ARed
That’s not entirely true.
What’s past is prolouge so far as I’m concerned.
When talking about past sexual encounters my favorite line to use is that “I’ve had a enough sex to know that I like it..”
And usually the “don’t ask what you don’t really want to know about” doctrine kicks in.
Plus, as long as you haven’t bedded anybody that I currently know, most dudes don’t care
By Raqi
September 11, 2008 12:50 PM | Link to this
Expectations are our guidelines or road map. If you don’t have expectations how do you know you are where you want to be or with whom you want to be with.
To date blindly is to date hazardously or even frivolously.
Everything starts with an inclination and should lead to a need.
Preferences and must-haves although are lists in reality, should be viewed as the substances that bring to life our desires.
By AmazonRed
September 11, 2008 12:51 PM | Link to this
Every woman I date starts at 100 points and then they go up or down from there.
Leon, so maybe it’s the women you’re attracted to? Don’t you have any female friends who have their ish together and take care of their bills and responsibilities?
By Leon Phelps
September 11, 2008 12:54 PM | Link to this
off topic How does a person who is not, and has never been wealthy struggle to support a 7 and 8 year old on $2000 a month? she should have left that part out and just said she wants more money so she can live good too… LoL
By Hot Mama
September 11, 2008 12:57 PM | Link to this
Jazzy
Great story, I called a guy I used to date 8 months after he moved away and his NEW WIFE anwsered the phone.
The one who got away…thank God for Big Jimmy. I don’t know how I would have made it without him. Whew!!
By AmazonRed
September 11, 2008 12:58 PM | Link to this
Plus, as long as you haven’t bedded anybody that I currently know, most dudes don’t care
Dan, we come from two different worlds in regards to this. I can see you being forgiving with woman who admit (or get called out) for having a wild past.
The dudes I know, aren’t forgiving of former h0es. NO guy I know would wife Kim Kardashian after that tape came out. They’d all use her for sexual escapades but they all think Reggie Bush is a damn fool.
By kimmie
September 11, 2008 12:59 PM | Link to this
Leon - I understand what you are saying. Actually, it sounds like you are saying the same thing I am saying. Why have a “list” of demands that you yourself couldn’t live up to? We all want an upgrade!LOL I don’t take anything you said or any other person on the blog personal because it does not apply to me. I have what is called good hometraining! For example, it is tacky as all get out to boast about material things and how many carats your ring needs to be! If materialistic, irresponsible, close-minded people are all a person is meeting, maybe they need to change the selection process. I’m just venting a little today because I like this blog, it’s entertaining, but the constant lady-bashing gets a little old. At times the blog men really drop some jewels, but they are not being caught by the right ones, because it “read” like most of the blog ladies really have it together!:)
By Leon Phelps
September 11, 2008 1:01 PM | Link to this
The Blogger formerly known as Kym Its a real email address but its where I send all potential spam/junkmail. I ain’t posting my real email address in the public so I can get more spam than I already get. The phrase “See no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil” is familair to meand probably everybody else here.. but I still have no clue as to who you might be so holla at me.
By The Blogger formerly known as Kym
September 11, 2008 1:01 PM | Link to this
Ohh Wisey before I forget..
I AM LOVING MY MACBOOK-Thank you for the recommendation.
By Chakra7
September 11, 2008 1:02 PM | Link to this
East Point’s Own The thing is I totally don’t have a problem with the type of freedom you describe about how men want to spend time with the fellas or doing male-bonding types of things - whatever those my be. I pretty much know Sundays are off-limits when football season is in or football is on period- I don’t have a problem with that.
One of my pet peeves is just not being straight in the beginning, about what you want, generally speaking. Don’t tell me you need time to get to know me, when all you really want is some attention. It’s almost like a wait-and-see approach or a test-drive approach men take, some men take with women, all the while expecting a woman to demonstrate up front all of what she’s willing to do or just plain do it and then see if/when there is return.
By The Truth
September 11, 2008 1:03 PM | Link to this
Ared I didn’t say all women were hoes. I said women bone like men but when they meet someone special it all never happened. I think that’s where guys start losing respect for a woman. A dude is like I was fuggin. A chick is like I was here waiting for you. BS. Like I’ve said it’s not the physical damage it’s the emotional damage. If you can’t take the pain don’t get out there doing dirt. I’m not a therapist and I’m not spending 3 years of my life helping you wade through the feelings of getting used up and dumped.
Das men aren’t love seeking missiles. They don’t get dressed up to go to Publix because the thought that someone special could be there doesnt register. When love comes its usually from your blindside anyway so why try preparing. Enjoy doing whatever it is you like and when another chapter of your life opens start reading it. And on sex, 10 years from now alot will change but I’ll still like that azz. I simply stay focused on what makes me happy. Just like you will always think of men for security I will always think of women for booty, ugh I mean comfort. To many cats get into relationships and forget about what they wanted to start with. Don’t ever forget that when I saw you I wanted to fugg you. LOL People that lose sight of what they got into this thing for usually wind up unhappy. LOL
By Dan
September 11, 2008 1:04 PM | Link to this
@ARed
And that’s where I differ from most.
I’ve been given my second chances in life and believe in doing the same for most people that I meet.
People can change.
@Jazzy
Thanks for your story. Can I ask you a personal question though?
I’ve had a lot of women run away, only to want to come back. But at that point I’m numb to their affections, so I cannot do it.
The question I have is, what made you run from it?
By Beautiful
September 11, 2008 1:04 PM | Link to this
atl guy this is what i don’t like about the game. you/he approach when you see fit. i want to adopt the approach, but i’ve did my own survey with ppl around me and females taking over is not a good look. being patient doesn’t sit well with me. shhh, don’t tell anyone i said that. lol.
jazzy thanks for your post! comments like that always inspire me. :-)
brb.
By AmazonRed
September 11, 2008 1:06 PM | Link to this
How does a person who is not, and has never been wealthy struggle to support a 7 and 8 year old on $2000 a month? she should have left that part out and just said she wants more money so she can live good too… LoL
Leon, I couldn’t support two kids on $2000 a month…IF I had no other job. It’s hard to live on $24,000 a year. She needs to get a job and suppliment that income! But maybe she is trying to be a stay at home mom. In that case, she’ll need more. But you’re right, she should just admit that she’s not trying to work!
By AmazonRed
September 11, 2008 1:10 PM | Link to this
I’ve been given my second chances in life and believe in doing the same for most people that I meet.
Dan, I know. And I think that’s great. However, many men aren’t as forgiving. I’m just saying that most dudes DO care, even though they’ve behaved in the same way. Double standard in favor of the guys this time.
Trust me, if all guys were more forgiving maybe I would have applied for my ho card! LOL.
A dude is like I was fuggin. A chick is like I was here waiting for you.
Truth, no girl I know is like this. You are exaggerating!
By jazzyone
September 11, 2008 1:10 PM | Link to this
AR Thanks chica..we both were in that lay low phaze dating but no roots…he was headed back to ATL in probably a year but after we established we wanted to go there with each other and see what happens he came back sooner and it was a wrap..still trying to believe it myself.
Leggs yep ran like the relay race in a prada shop give away.. I ran..I thought and doubted the truth about how i was feeling it scared me to find someone that i was truly looking for plus the fact he was a little younger than me..A man has never made me feel scared and wanting to flee even some of the folks here in my family can tell you I was torn and afraid to let go. I never ever thought I could love the way I do now.
By NEW-MELO
September 11, 2008 1:19 PM | Link to this
ARED,Momania blog is off da chain today.If Wise had this today,wld be in the 400 mark by now! Yesterday’s was the lousiest Wise has ever posted….
By Leon Phelps
September 11, 2008 1:20 PM | Link to this
AmazonRed Yes I do have female friends who pretty much have it all together but they are 1. married, 2. engaged 3. still chasing a thug 4. “Emotionally Unavailable” .. LoL I find that a lot of women who in the corporate type environment either want a guy who is higher up the ladder ( as far as income or career goes) or they want some ole body builder/pretty boy (whether he has a job or not). And I am neither of those 2 things… I am just below management level, non pretty boy, and I get a lot of corporate type women who turn their nose up at that… and I treat all these chicks the same I ain’t pandering to nobody because you look a certain way or you have a certain job title. One friend of mine calls me the nicest mean guy she ever met… I am far from mean, but you just have to have the ability to understand a guy with a different perspective if you mess with me.
I don’t really date all that much, I mean I have gone on dates with 4 women this summer, and none have made it to a second date, but the last one will, if our schedules permit. 3 of the 4 women all came at me with the “I am not trying to start a relationship” line at some time during the first date so they obviously never qualify for date #2 The last woman was pretty much a laid back chick and we enjoyed ourselves so I plan on seeing her again.. now will she have her act together.. that is to be determined…
I think a lot of the women I have met were hurt (just as we all have been) but they think that making it harder for a guy to get in good with them will protect them… this is not the case if a man is determined to just get what he wants he will wait, play along or whatever until his mission is accomplished… so its pretty much a futile effort to try to protect your heart.. you just end up missing out on good things.
By jazzyone
September 11, 2008 1:20 PM | Link to this
Dan
I didn’t call him to get back with him it was a genuine concern..his first words were about my status i in turn asked the same questions and it was on.. and when we got on the phone he immedialtey said Jazz I called your old friend a few weeks ago to ask for your number and she threw shade at him and said she didn’t have my number.(she did)
I called him becasue I live by intution and i felt on my heart from time to him lingering around it..the same was true for him..
I ran becasue i didnt’ want the complications of what i thought would be the love bug, getting to know someone again, the ups and downs of relationships..but everytime we got together it was a natural feeling of love for each other. The intimacy was past the point of sex being in each others company till the wee hours was incredible enough..we didn’t want to put a qucik hit in it to mess things up thats how we both knew we wanted more…that terrified me after being engaged to someone almost a year prior. I thought in my head i can’t be in love with this man like this he was in my heart and NO MAN gets there that easy and fast..not jaded but love wasn’t on my list..it crept up on me..and i couldnt’ handle it at the time..i fought it and him…his dad told me he lingerred around ATL trying to contact me always talked about this woman that ran away and he didn’t hear from anymore after he thought it was love…and its history…
By DasV
September 11, 2008 1:23 PM | Link to this
Dan fear. bottomline
theTruth what you would have us believe is that it is not fear that motivates you…. but i put it to you that it is. you fear being dependent on anyone for anything, especially in an emotional way. all you want to want from us is sex, because that is all that you are capable of handling. beyond that you crumble… we don’t forget that you were initially attracted to us and wanted to bed us, we simply attempt to take you further… to the depths and not just the snorkling exercise that you all are more comfortable with.
if you were implying that we get dressed up and seek love interests at Publix please stand corrected… we do not. not those of us who have discovered that it is more fun to have our own car, house, money, job and not to have consult with anyone on next years vacation spot. i am trembling now at the discussion i had with my 13yr old because he wanted to stay at a sandals resort instead the economical resort i chose….. smh
By The Blogger formerly known as Kym
September 11, 2008 1:25 PM | Link to this
Another thang Wisey all sensitive man songs should use John Mayer as examples. He touches on all that vulnerable man stuff.
By Leon Phelps
September 11, 2008 1:27 PM | Link to this
Chakra7 Well that’s what I advocate being str8 in the beginning, middle, and if there is on, in the end too. In a way that’s what I think the whole ” I don’t want a relationship thing is” its a combination of fear of getting hurt, and wanting to test drive the dude(on the sly) if you truly did not want a relationship why date? just have yourself a good ole cut buddy type arrangement and call it a day. If you want to go places outside the house with me then you want to date… whether you admit it or not. Other wise I am sure one of your girlfriends or gay friends could have joined you.
By m'karyl
September 11, 2008 1:29 PM | Link to this
@Melo
I ain’t using New…lol…you still Melo…oh yeah…check this…using the theory of starting with an apple seed to get apple sauce…there is a woman who has a shop in downtown Decatur called Two Sticks…she designs and sells jewelry, knitting items, etc…she works with some ppl in Taiwan to collaborate on her ideas and such…anyway, she is quite resourceful and she may be able to provide you with some good leads on who to talk to about your stones…being that she actually purchases such stuff herself…it may not hurt to contact her and see what kind of 411 she might be able to provide…apple seeds to apple sauce.
By AmazonRed
September 11, 2008 1:30 PM | Link to this
I find that a lot of women who in the corporate type environment either want a guy who is higher up the ladder ( as far as income or career goes) or they want some ole body builder/pretty boy (whether he has a job or not). And I am neither of those 2 things… I am just below management level, non pretty boy, and I get a lot of corporate type women who turn their nose up at that
Leon, I have to concur and will tell you right now that because you recognize this, you are a hidden gem. Especially for being 28.
I would most certainly date a man who is non-management level, but working on that track, however, the ones I give a chance to are usually emotionally unavailable and have tunnel vision because they are trying to get to that next level.
I hope that if you do find a girl who accepts you as is, you go for it cuz once you move up, the ladies will be plentiful, but will you trust any of them?
In any case, kudos.
By m'karyl
September 11, 2008 1:31 PM | Link to this
yep ran like the relay race in a prada shop give away
So I take it that you were gone fst and quick, without hestitation…lmao…got that image in my head…no doubt.
By SlimOne
September 11, 2008 1:32 PM | Link to this
Leon You’re so right, i’m not reading every post…it gets hard to concentrate in between sips of my Margarita….What are they gonna do…FIRE ME? lol…Slim now looking up company contacts and sending them all a picture of my Middle FANGA! all while burping, slurring my speech and scratching my CT LOL!
By wRENN
September 11, 2008 1:32 PM | Link to this
@ Wise Diva…thanks for that tidbit of info on Kanye’s site…and I just read that article about Kanye getting arrested in the airport for breaking a camera man’s camera…lol not really funny though but hearing different stories about Kanye i.e. MTV music awards last year he appears to be somewhat of a spoiled brat with temper tantrums…oh well money can’t change everything…i still like him though…
@ Staceye aka Mamba…that trip to New York was really different…besides 9/11 going on when i got off the plane to catch a cab i had never seen so many taxi cab drivers…it was like a sea of cars, not to mention the rides from hell, being jerked from side to side in the backseat because they are use to people being in a hurry…going around corners on two wheels.
On topic: while i agree with alot of posts, dating is tricky you are damned if you do and damned if you don’t…
Like i always say, you are too old to change just old enough to compromise, maybe if men and women meet each other half way dating might actually become fun again. I doubt that we will because society has made so many rules tell you have to have your ears and eyes open to keep up…
And please can you married men stop asking for my phone number…like Tyler Perry said “Why did i get married?”
By MLL
September 11, 2008 1:33 PM | Link to this
I agree Leon Phelps @ 1:27
By Dan
September 11, 2008 1:37 PM | Link to this
@Jazzy
Again thank you. Thank you for answering my question, and thank you for being woman enough to admit your fear. And thank you for being woman enough to get over it.
Can you teach a class in this respect? A lot of babes need this help…
@Das
I’ve always suspected as much. Like we were saying yesterday, it’s that light that scares them. After all the bad experiences you run into one of the few not afraid of that light, and you run.
I mean I get it, it’s scary. Like Jazzy said, no one gets that close. But at some point, from my perspective, it’s not my job to prove anything, my actions should be enough.
And when it’s not, when the task proves too hard…I stopped playing Dr.Phil and now I leave.
@ARed
Does my explanation to Jazzy make any sense about why I don’t chase women, now?
By wRENN
September 11, 2008 1:38 PM | Link to this
@ Truth 1:03 post, lol and while you playing Whole Foods Stores actually has a dating night at their downtown location during the week…I have not attended but I think it’s either on Tuesday or Wednesday nights where singles are welcome to come shop for food and dates…They actually advertise it…now that is funny!
By Chakra7
September 11, 2008 1:38 PM | Link to this
Leon Phelps I personally don’t ever use the “I don’t want a relationship” line. I know of women who do, but I know I would strictly be fronting to say this because like you say, if that’s truly want I don’t want, I most likely won’t be turning on the charm for any length of time, flirting with you or going out with you. But I do think there is room for friendship, platonic friendship as long as that’s understood upfront.
By Dan
September 11, 2008 1:41 PM | Link to this
@Leon
Welcome to the club of “Trying to be Better Men”
Personally, I’m bout to resign my membership and go back and pick up my Playa Card.
But you stick it out homie…good luck.
By Leon Phelps
September 11, 2008 1:41 PM | Link to this
AmazonRed trust… what’s dat? (just kidding) but thanks I appreciate it. Since I moved to VA I noticed a huge emphasis on men being pretty boys or body builders… I mean down south GA, FL, AL it was no big deal but up here these chicks are not trying to give you the time of day unless you got $$$,$$$ or 18 inch arms. But like I said last week, strangely I have met a lot of women from ATL & a few from TX up here in VA it seems like they just find me wherever I go…LoL I just need them to get a few things in order and maybe one of them could work it on out.
By AmazonRed
September 11, 2008 1:45 PM | Link to this
Does my explanation to Jazzy make any sense about why I don’t chase women, now?
Dan, not really. Because your posts don’t point to that being the reason. Your post come across as you’re just lazy. No offense.
Besides, Jazzy’s dude, 1) didn’t give up hope for her and 2) was still working behind the scenes trying to get her number and you don’t post like you’d ever put forth that type of effort. And I don’t think you’d wait a significant amount of time for sex either.
Of course I could be wrong, but I’m just telling you how you “read”
I don’t know how to say that without sounding abrasive so just know that I’m not posting that from a bad place, but you asked.
By a daily lurker
September 11, 2008 1:49 PM | Link to this
know that’s a bit extreme but the point is that men fall harder when they do fall in love and in a lot of cases it can cause serious mental damage when a love leaves a man, and often it really takes a months/years to recover completely. For real?! Not buying it. Men aren’t capable of love. I have yet to see it.
Where is PG if he concurs, then I’ll know EPO and others are speaking the truth and blowing out personal perferences and stating “apply to all” as in men.
By DasV
September 11, 2008 1:49 PM | Link to this
jazzyONE ok… it was already sweet…. now your story is just beautiful happy for you!
By The Truth
September 11, 2008 1:50 PM | Link to this
Das you can try to make this as deep as you like but it’s really not. For me to get into emotional scrimmages with a woman is madness. She has the home court advantage and victory is assured. I can’t lead jack when my feelings are hurt or I need reassurance. What I do is take my feelings out of it and do what must be done. And about fear, I’ve been in love and fear has nothing to do with it. Everything I did before I’d do again. you see, thats the thing, heartbreak doesn’t hurt that much. It’s uncomfortable for a minute but that passes. What never passes is the feeling of putting up with shyt you dont want to because you’re trying to be caring and comforting. Thats not my strong suit. My role is the unemotional callous b******* that refuses to talk with you while you’re crying. LOL
Also, I used to think that women had a lock on the emotional side of relationships but they dont. They simply try to configure situations to prevent themselves from feeling pain.
Ared Exaggeration? Thats called artistic license. LOL
By NEW-MELO
September 11, 2008 1:51 PM | Link to this
m’karyl thanks,ill check all ur recommendations this weekend,seems im about to get paid!I will remember u,maybe order another consignment that will give u 05% of gross sales…..
By NEW-MELO
September 11, 2008 1:55 PM | Link to this
And I don’t think you’d wait a significant amount of time for sex either. hw much time is significant i ur book ared? I knw foots has hinted in past she prefers getting the sexxual tension dispensed with as soon as possible so folk can get to pierce each other’s hearts in a relaxed manner.Do u like *foots * route?
By Dan
September 11, 2008 1:55 PM | Link to this
@ARed
I know, and I did ask.
But you’re right, I’d never put that kinda effort into finding or convincing a woman like ole boy did for Jazzy.
As far as the “waiting for sex” goes, there’s no correlation between liking one woman and being physicallly intimate with another my opinion.
But dude stuck it out for what he wanted and I commend him for it. Not that I wouldn’t, I just don’t feel like I have to.
Put it this way, if I meet an adult woman and I’m just being me, I don’t have an obligation to walk her through what she’s going through…kinda like you with emotionally unavailable men?
By i'm swiss
September 11, 2008 1:56 PM | Link to this
“Not buying it. Men aren’t capable of love. I have yet to see it.”
Maybe that says something about you?
By Dan
September 11, 2008 1:59 PM | Link to this
@ARed
I know, and I did ask.
But you’re right, I’d never put that kinda effort into finding or convincing a woman like ole boy did for Jazzy.
As far as the “waiting for sex” goes, there’s no correlation between liking one woman and being physicallly intimate with another my opinion.
But dude stuck it out for what he wanted and I commend him for it. Not that I wouldn’t, I just don’t feel like I have to.
Put it this way, if I meet an adult woman and I’m just being me, I don’t have an obligation to walk her through what she’s going through…kinda like you with emotionally unavailable men?
By AmazonRed
September 11, 2008 1:59 PM | Link to this
melo - As a rough estimate, let’s say 3 months. And since the emotional connection is so strong, you can’t get any on the side either in that time period.
But no, I’m not a fan of the Foots route.
By ATL Guy
September 11, 2008 2:01 PM | Link to this
Beautiful the game has changed. I’m not patient person either! Actually, would be nice to have more females initiating conversation with guys. Feels like so much of it is timing when to make the move these days or how soon to call after a first date, etc etc. Thats annoying really.
You know what I’m saying!?
By Leon Phelps
September 11, 2008 2:02 PM | Link to this
a daily lurker Well sad to say it but ummm maybe the fact that you have never witnessed a man who is in love might saying that you have not gotten a man to that point yet, or you are not aware of what love is…. don’t mean to be harsh but that’s real…
Dan well like I said this young lady from last weekend is it for me if we don’t work out then its back to the club for me this weekend… grabbin arses and being ignant once again… who knows maybe I’ll catch a winner that way.
By thinkb4speakin
September 11, 2008 2:02 PM | Link to this
Ladies, the idea of the man who is emotionally handicapped is much easier to swallow than… “he is just not that into you”. But, I’m afraid in 99.9% of “unable to let go” scenarios, it is the later.
HE IS JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU. Hoping that you can help him overcome this imagined “handicap” is setting you up for disappointment, heartbreak, abuse, or a nervous breakdown.
By MELO
September 11, 2008 2:04 PM | Link to this
Great story, I called a guy I used to date 8 months after he moved away and his NEW WIFE anwsered the phone
hey,dnt believe that shyytt,he waz fugging u but was married or was seriously dating her and ur were just side pudsy…..either way,thank god u got lyfeless jimmy,so no loss for u,jsut make sure the lead and rust dont get in there…….
By MLL
September 11, 2008 2:07 PM | Link to this
Truth why do you lump all women together on everything? You act as if we’re some evil creatures running around seeking men to sink our teeth to draw blood….There are some good women out there, maybe she is not physically what you want but their heart and minds are in the right place…..I sometimes read you as a very hurt and jaded guy….With all these negative feelings your prone to be left out in the cold.
By DasV
September 11, 2008 2:08 PM | Link to this
Dan All human actions are motivated at their deepest level by one of two emotions—fear or love. its usual the fear, because its easier…. ie…to fear the unknown instead of work to find out about it. to risk finding out that you are incapable of grasping the concenpt of a particular thing. i agree with you… you (nor i) should have to prove anything, to anyone. we answer but to one. who chooses to love us must do so on their on volition (channeling darrell with that word) … simply because they like what we do and how we do it and can work with our level of ‘crazy’.
theTruth emotional scrimmages… with that you state your position. you are afraid of field plays…. because as you put it we have the home court advantage… im not that big of sports fan, but even i know that there is nothing better than to win a game on another team’s turf…. and i disagree.. victory for us is not assured… we’d prefer not to win, truth be told. but you all count yourselves out the real game before it begins… and i still say its cause of fear. not fear of heartbreak, but fear of succeeding in loving and being loved. heartbreak at our age is childs-play. BTW…. that ‘putting up wht shyt you dont want to because you’re trying to be caring and comforting’ is called love. AND you right ‘love’ is not your strong suit. :)
By MELO
September 11, 2008 2:10 PM | Link to this
ok,i just wish more chics were open to more fugging earlier.Tht way,we wldnt have a lot of games,heartbreaks and kids with no dads in the hse.I wish God wld have created wmen same as men..there wld be no holds barred fugging a lot of times and that wld make for very happy pple.Instead,u got sexx starved adults(men and wmen) molesting kids coz they are shy or got issues to do that with other adults….not right.
By Dan
September 11, 2008 2:11 PM | Link to this
@ARed
3 Months! 3 Months, 3 Months ????
Awww, nawww shawty! By that time, I’m dried out like the Sahara….
After 3 Months you might a “30 second 3 pump then sleepy” shot.
3 Months…
Damn
By i'm swiss
September 11, 2008 2:11 PM | Link to this
D@mn… Just d@mn
By The Truth
September 11, 2008 2:13 PM | Link to this
Wrenn its a date then. I’ll meet you in the vegetable department at 9. I’ll be wearing the 3 button with the Cole Haans and trying to look debonnair while chewing on a carrot. LOL
Daily lurker I’m with you on that men incapable of love thing. I dont think what men and women call love is the same thing. For me it mostly comes out right before a _. LOL
By MLL
September 11, 2008 2:18 PM | Link to this
Ared do you methodically count down to 90 days and bam! you peel the panties?
By Sidelines
September 11, 2008 2:18 PM | Link to this
daily lurker, know that’s a bit extreme but the point is that men fall harder when they do fall in love and in a lot of cases it can cause serious mental damage when a love leaves a man, and often it really takes a months/years to recover completely. For real?! Not buying it. Men aren’t capable of love. I have yet to see it.
I’m going to have to agree with Leon on this one, maybe you have never witnessed it or gotten a man to that point, but TRUST me, it happens and unfortunately I’ve witnessed situations where men have loved to that degree and it took them years and in one case has yet to have ever really gotten over it as a result of being that much in love with a woman. It happens…
By AmazonRed
September 11, 2008 2:20 PM | Link to this
Put it this way, if I meet an adult woman and I’m just being me, I don’t have an obligation to walk her through what she’s going through…kinda like you with emotionally unavailable men?
Dan, no, not like me. Because I’m willing to take the walk with him thru his issues.
But you’re right, I’d never put that kinda effort into finding or convincing a woman like ole boy did for Jazzy.
LOL. We know.
By MELO
September 11, 2008 2:21 PM | Link to this
i’m swiss, thanks for that link.If i make a sale this wekend, im buying my ticket and going to sacramento for the weekend.I think i will just tell the lady of the house that i found a buyer over there…cherry pickings indeed,makes Angie’s cali pudsy seem like real stale in comparison…
By kimmie
September 11, 2008 2:21 PM | Link to this
Leon - There you go right there:
if we don’t work out then its back to the club for me this weekend… grabbin arses and being ignant once again… who knows maybe I’ll catch a winner that way.
I just know you were joking with this! Like I said above - Upgrade your selection process if you want a together, responsible, open-minded, non-materialistic individual!
By m'karyl
September 11, 2008 2:22 PM | Link to this
MLL
BTW, I have come up with some male/female logic equations:
If man’s attracted to woman=woman’s attacted to man, then man thinks woman is okay.
If man’s not attracted to woman=woman’s not attract to man, then man thinks woman is okay.
If man’s attracted to woman=woman not attracted to man, then man thinks somethings wrong with woman.
If man’s not attracted to woman=woman attracted to man, then man thinks somethings wrong with woman.
LOL…about right ain’t it????
By MELO
September 11, 2008 2:22 PM | Link to this
MLL u think ared is too strict with it in comparison to u..whats ur hold out policy….??
By Caroline
September 11, 2008 2:27 PM | Link to this
geez… you are saying this is a Man’s reaction ONLY… i felt my feelings exactly from Kanye’s words. I’m a woman that puts on my Manolos or Guccis on and get to runnin’ (because us women CAN run in heels). Relationships are not for me and the writer of this article forgot the ladies that also keep their heart on lockdown also!
By Leggs
September 11, 2008 2:27 PM | Link to this
There’s too much here for me to read. Are you guys still on topic?
By wRENN
September 11, 2008 2:29 PM | Link to this
@ Truth, Psssttt, come here i wanna whisper something in your ear…I promise you will like it…
meet me on aisle 6 right by the cotton balls…
By Leon Phelps
September 11, 2008 2:29 PM | Link to this
kimmie naw I wasn’t joking that’s what clubs are for… touching random women’s rear ends.. if she doesn’t slap or throw a drink at the poor dude standing directly behind her then you know you need to find her later about 30 mins. before closing time… LoL I ain’t trying to find a “date” in the club… “what you talkin bout willis???”
Ok well that’s in the 21+ clubs but in the 25 & 30 + clubs its a bit different, a guy can actually talk to women decently in those establishments :-)
By AmazonRed
September 11, 2008 2:29 PM | Link to this
ok,i just wish more chics were open to more fugging earlier.
melo, from what is posted here there is NO shortage of women who will give up the panties within a few hours of meeting you! So come on now, you can get what you want sexually when you want it from SOMEONE!
Now I’ll tell you this, I might not fugg you off the initial meeting but once the work is put in, once we go there, I’m gonna do what it takes to keep you satisfied. Period. You don’t have to have a lot of different men to have a lot of experience!
Dan made the point earlier: “Thing is only my woman will see that side of me,” in terms of emotions. I feel the same way sexually.
MLL - I don’t have a 3 month rule, I was just throwing a theory out there.
By MLL
September 11, 2008 2:32 PM | Link to this
LMBO M’K you nailed it on the head…
melo put ya glasses on correct, I didn’t say ared was too strict with anything. Me, right now, I’m not into pre-marital sex. And yes I do sexless dates.
By The Truth
September 11, 2008 2:33 PM | Link to this
MLL no, I would be jaded had I stayed married and had kids. I don’t want nor need either. Life is good as it is. I don’t want to be responsible for someones feelings, children, or anything that takes away from my journey through this life. And I’ve said there are alot of good women out there, if you’re looking for a good woman. I prefer mine with low self esteem and an oral fixation. LOL
Das don’t take this personally. Historically men have never wanted to settle down, as long as he had choices. This isn’t about love anymore. It’s about business. Look at TI getting hit upside the head for more loot. $2000 was cool for the hoodrat when she just wanted to have his baby and be with him. now he has loot she needs more. You see I stole the decoder ring that says for women security is money. Personally, and this is just me speaking, while I love you’all to death, I don’t want to make any type of lifelong plans with any of you. A womans emotions are a wild card thats very expensive with our current legal system. Lets date and enjoy life but when feelings get into it you’re on your own. LOL
By Hot Mama
September 11, 2008 2:35 PM | Link to this
Melo
U broke dizznick, flat head Africian, mind yo goat eating, jungle hoppin’ bizness. MF’s like you always trynna get in MF hole dey can’t fit in. When I want to know how to ride a plucking hyneena or skin a zebra, I’ll address your musky azz until then put on your bear rug and step off!!
By Leon Phelps
September 11, 2008 2:36 PM | Link to this
Amazon Red
from what is posted here there is NO shortage of women who will give up the panties within a few hours of meeting you! So come on now, you can get what you want sexually when you want it from SOMEONE! if only this were true…I would be a happy camper every dayummm day…LoL
By jazzyone
September 11, 2008 2:36 PM | Link to this
There really was no effort there I walked away we let it lay…then after 3 years we had a vibe at the same time relativiely in the same three week period..no chase..just a vibe that I caught after he put it in the universe. he didn’t have to convice me of anything and we both had our own seperate relationship blues..weve gotten past them and to the point of the lovin honey and it RAWKS!!!!! Can you tell im in love..yeah i know its sappy and tiresome reading it but im screaming(writing) it from the rooftops…LMAOFFF
By i'm swiss
September 11, 2008 2:37 PM | Link to this
melo — Better make sure you get that physical exam first for verification. I’m not buying it. Maybe she had that “vaginal rejuvenation” surgery (or whatever they call it), but I’d bet the farm that that well has been tapped.
By kimmie
September 11, 2008 2:38 PM | Link to this
Leon - Oh, awright then!LOL
Seriously though, have you looked other places like volunteering, clubs associated with your favorite hobby, sports-related like running clubs or tennis clubs, political campaigns,etc? You probably could meet some quality ladies and serve you community as well.
By MLL
September 11, 2008 2:42 PM | Link to this
I prefer mine with low self esteem and an oral fixation well dang Truth you don’t have to look too far for that…..LOL
By Chink
September 11, 2008 2:44 PM | Link to this
you can have ….”whatever you like”…yeah
Too bad I think T.I is being sarcastic in this song…..
It sounds so good though. :)
By AmazonRed
September 11, 2008 2:44 PM | Link to this
if only this were true…I would be a happy camper every dayummm day…LoL
Leon, you probably have standards. I said SOMEONE will be willing, but sometimes that “someone” has tats on her neck and a bullet wound or two. LOL
Can you tell im in love..
jazzy, we can because you are nice now. LOL. It’s not tiresome at all.
By i'm swiss
September 11, 2008 2:45 PM | Link to this
@melo — Then again, maybe she did what a lot of these teens who sign those “virginity pacts” do — let everyone in the back door instead. LOL But I know that chic knows her way around a diznick.
By Dan
September 11, 2008 2:46 PM | Link to this
@Kimmie
I once went to this volunteering seminar hosted by the 100 Black Men and it was open to all sexes….
The women that were there, were walking around like it was Club Hilton….
I mean tight dresses, high heels, makeup not that I minded per se.., but all the guys in the room were like “Really? You shopping at the initial meeting?
Damn!
By MLL
September 11, 2008 2:46 PM | Link to this
DANG!!Hot mamma tell melo how you really feel about him LMBO while melo ride off in the sunset on a zebra wearing a bear rug
By Leon Phelps
September 11, 2008 2:47 PM | Link to this
I do volunteer, I used to attend political events and I am a member of professional organizations, but then I am involved in something like that its for the purpose of doing whatever that organization’s mission is, and I have not met anyone interesting doing those things… as far as recreational activities, I don’t run into too many women while I am out fishing, at the shooting range, or hiking through the woods. ANd I have this incredible knack for connecting well with married women.. I don’t know what that’s all about but married women tend to flirt with me a lot… and I let them.
By MELO
September 11, 2008 2:48 PM | Link to this
Hot Mama unless ur pigmentation resembles AtlBoy,u proly africian 1st and american 2nd….so watch u say? Ur enslaved and goat eating, jungle hoppin’ ship riding grandpa waz ma uncle…. MLL,not into pre-marital sex?? U running rings round these lame dudes,what a facade….
By Dan
September 11, 2008 2:49 PM | Link to this
@MLL
Would that:
well dang Truth you don’t have to look too far for that…..LOL
be you volunteering?
No offense, but you’ve posted some of your thoughts about sex, I’m just askin….
By Leon Phelps
September 11, 2008 2:50 PM | Link to this
AmazonRed Tats on the neck is a little bit Hott… LoL bullet wounds.. not so much… I got that covered for the both of us already…
By Jazzyone
September 11, 2008 2:51 PM | Link to this
AR I know right, that is indeed the truth…got some regular love in my life, the grass is greener, the sky is blue-er, songs are so lovely, the brids are chirping i like this part of me better…LMAOFF.
By AmazonRed
September 11, 2008 2:54 PM | Link to this
kimmie, dan - Back when my sister lived here in Atlanta, she was faithful member of Ma$e’s church. Well, all the women in the congregation were enamored with Ma$e’s wife and she would host teas and seminars. She basically told all the women she would have never gotten her man had she not “dressed for what she wanted.” She encouraged all the women to doll up everytime they left the house because you’d never know who’s out there watching.
My sister was all for that. It was funny. She’s now married to a guy who met her as a broke azz college student!
By The Truth
September 11, 2008 2:55 PM | Link to this
Who p** off Hot Mama?
Wrenn I’m a pretty creative and open minde guy but cotton balls? LMAO
By m'karyl
September 11, 2008 2:55 PM | Link to this
@MML That is about what I was thinking…dayuumm..Hot Mama* became **Livd Read Mama…snap…oh no…wow…awrighty now.
By MELO
September 11, 2008 2:56 PM | Link to this
I’m gonna do what it takes to keep you satisfied. Period. You don’t have to have a lot of different men to have a lot of experience! sounds too too good to me..too bad ur commercial has no takers here, i knw ur top grade…lol and from what is posted here there is NO shortage of women who will give up the panties within a few hours of meeting you that i can tell.Did u see what Hot Mama posted earlier.chics like her are leaking like sleaves,i tell u if the ajc were to discountnue this blog,most of these posts wont even make it to the manure grade…..but i knw truckers love chics like that,truckers bizzness is time sensitive and a chic with a loose fitting panty is hot commodity…lol
By kimmie
September 11, 2008 2:56 PM | Link to this
Dan - You prolly right about that because it was kinda that way when I used to be involved in the National Black MBA Assoc. A bit of a meat-market but they were more professional with it!
Leon - Yeah, I have that same attraction from married men. They say they like talking to me because I seem married! What does that mean? Anyway, I let them know I have absolutely nothing for them!
By MLL
September 11, 2008 2:57 PM | Link to this
melo not every man is as $lutty as you, walking round as if they never had sex, no facade, I have standards,
not a chance Dan my self esteem is not low enough for Truth.
As for posting about sex, what’s wrong with that, what is it,I can’t say it unless I do it?
By AmazonRed
September 11, 2008 2:58 PM | Link to this
got some regular love in my life, the grass is greener, the sky is blue-er, songs are so lovely, the brids are chirping i like this part of me better…LMAOFF.
jazzyone - You know I understand! I just love hearing these fairytale stories. I wish you guys all the best!
By m'karyl
September 11, 2008 2:59 PM | Link to this
And Melo lobs the ball back over the net…bing…okay now ppls..uh-huh…ain’t fam grand…kin folk and such…lol
By Hot Mama
September 11, 2008 3:00 PM | Link to this
Melo
Since we sooo enslaved…why in da hell did u bring yo monkey chasing, tree climbing azz ova here. Gone back to the motherland and reclaim yo hut, screw yo sister,rape your daughter, fight the mosquiters, and fan the flys cause it’s so much betta ova there and we all watered down over here. Africian booty scratcher pleaze.
By Dan
September 11, 2008 3:01 PM | Link to this
the grass is greener, the sky is blue-er, songs are so lovely, the brids are chirping i like this part of me better…
Jazzy got some loving….Jazzy got some good loving….
HAHAHAHAHAHA
By AmazonRed
September 11, 2008 3:01 PM | Link to this
Tats on the neck is a little bit Hott… LoL bullet wounds.. not so much… I got that covered for the both of us already
Leon, I’m so looking at you sideways right now!!!
By MELO
September 11, 2008 3:06 PM | Link to this
MLL i aint dissing ur game,even whoes have standards too,some wont bone for $100,others wl for less.I hope ur facade,i mean ur standards wl take u to where u wanna go…u think im slutty coz i write as such….if u knw me,u proly wanna date me and peel those gouchie panties outright…tell me u aint curious……
By Staceye AKA Black Mamba
September 11, 2008 3:06 PM | Link to this
ARED Last May when I stubmled across the blog was around the time my split happened. That is whay I have been the same sinece day one. No..no relationship kept from Blogsville. LOL
By Wise Diva
September 11, 2008 3:08 PM | Link to this
I nearly choked on my water reading Hot mama! Oooweeeee, settle down chica, woosah! LOL! dang, is this Fight club week on the blog and I missed the memo!?
By Leon Phelps
September 11, 2008 3:08 PM | Link to this
AmazonRed hey tats and piercings are alright with me… what can I say??? I am open minded when it comes to women… LoL I like a wide variety
By kimmie
September 11, 2008 3:10 PM | Link to this
Amred - I got one better! How about one of my best friends was getting married. I was her maid of honor and on the way to the church she needed to stop by the printers to pick up the programs(don’t know what she was paying the wedding coordinator for?!). Anyway, she had her hair pinned up on top with one roller in it because the hair stylist was waiting on us to do our hair at the church. How about she took her hair down and combed and styled it to RUN in the printer shop to get the programs! I was screaming that we were running terribly late and the church did not play - they had us on a schedule. What was she going to do, meet someone else in that split second in the printer shop and cancel the wedding?! She’s a gorgeous girl, face was already made up so nobody would have looked at her critically at all. It blew my mind, the diva-ness of it all!!!LOL
By MELO
September 11, 2008 3:10 PM | Link to this
Since we sooo enslaved why we and not u..u wanna encite a blog mob lynch..im family here,u the child outa wedlock.maybe…. i came here to follow family,see… why u not claiming me as ur own….??? next time u post, think…now can we exchange contacts so we can have family reunion…??
By m'karyl
September 11, 2008 3:13 PM | Link to this
@WD
Melo and Hot Mama playing some double dutch dozens…lol
By Hot Mama
September 11, 2008 3:15 PM | Link to this
MELO
Daily you come on here and use yo brown nail beds and money hands to type degrading comments about women and your head dress wearing wife. What the pluck bout yo azz, you must a be prize. HEYA NAWH
Yo azz wants mfing attention…well yo azz got it now. AFRICIAN Why don’t yo azz try to uplift someone, say sometin respectfull for a change. Just cause yo culture does not respect women, you should strive to do betta, since you in a NEW LAND mf. But heya nawh, the same nasty, perverted, shyte ev’day. Get yo azz a new mind set, while you ova here making our money pick up some manners, flathead, musky sob.
By DasV
September 11, 2008 3:16 PM | Link to this
Truth you crack me up. so you are scared of our legal system, not us per se. LOL and you dont trust the ‘get a good lawyer’ advice either, right??
outside of God and love, you aight by me… heheheheeheee
By Leggs
September 11, 2008 3:17 PM | Link to this
Hot Dayyuumm Hot Mama!
By Leon Phelps
September 11, 2008 3:17 PM | Link to this
AmazonRed hey tats and piercings are alright with me… what can I say??? I am open minded when it comes to women… LoL I like a wide variety
By AmazonRed
September 11, 2008 3:17 PM | Link to this
Staceye, Got ya girl. Sorry the break up was so bad. :-(
Dan, I just re-read your question about not chasing. So earlier you said that everyone deserves a second chance then you said that if they come back, you’re numb. So I guess everyone doesn’t deserve a 2nd chance w/ you. LOL
By MLL
September 11, 2008 3:18 PM | Link to this
EEEWWWW melo just the thought of me peelin my panties for you, I feel sick not even for a black unlimited mastercard! and stop writing as such and you wont be called out your name..and NO I am NOT curious.
By Leggs
September 11, 2008 3:21 PM | Link to this
SMDH…even when being cussed the fluck out, Melo’s asking for digits. That was funny to me!
By DasV
September 11, 2008 3:22 PM | Link to this
Truth you crack me up. so you are scared of our legal system, not us per se. LOL and you dont trust the ‘get a good lawyer’ advice either, right??
outside of God and love, you aight by me… heheheheeheee
hotMamma dang. smh
just an observation… you couldve shown him ‘manners’ by how you checked him.
now WD fenda come on and tell everyone in general to stop the hate talk and such …. LOL… oops im late on that one…..
By MELO
September 11, 2008 3:23 PM | Link to this
hands to type degrading comments about women sis,not me, i luv me some afr-america females,no degrading here..u confuse me with smeone else…..Yo azz wants mfing attention i sure do,think thats wrong babe…same nasty, perverted, shyte ev’day why sexx pervetted?? i luv it,and proud to say it..are u a prude?? culture does not respect women sure does,u just dnt have time to understand it..if i say ur culture dnt respect men and marriage,u take that as fact coz u ladies are doing it and just fcking and having babies….see…we need to get together and understand each other.I luv ur sassy self tho…so are we cool now…
By AmazonRed
September 11, 2008 3:23 PM | Link to this
I pretty much know Sundays are off-limits when football season is in or football is on period- I don’t have a problem with that.
Chakra7 - You no likey football? That’s one thing that usually surprises guys about my bougie behind. I’m right their with my guy on Sundays. And on Saturdays (college football) if he plays his cards right he can fly with me to one of the college games I’m at during the season.
By Leggs
September 11, 2008 3:23 PM | Link to this
Sorry, but the barb between Melo and Hot Mama is a lot more interesting than AtlGuy and m’karyl. Guess one reconciliation per day is better than none!
Hot Mama, you’re very, very colorful!
By The Truth
September 11, 2008 3:24 PM | Link to this
Das its just something I’d rather not deal with. Its not set up for me and I choose not to participate.
Melo you really p** Hot Head off. I didn’t see anything out of the normal you posted. I’ll just go back and reread your posts. Bywm she has me rolling calling you flathead. Roflmao
By MELO
September 11, 2008 3:25 PM | Link to this
MLL u too proud,its ur loss…….
By Hot Mama
September 11, 2008 3:29 PM | Link to this
Melo
Anuther thang, MF. NOBODY WANTS YOU NOOOBOODDYY!!!!
By MELO
September 11, 2008 3:30 PM | Link to this
What the pluck bout yo azz, you must be a prize thats what my wman thinks and says..thats her opinion tho….u got urs???? or he married now…… she dnt put no head scarves,she no muslim or do that..but she and her afri-amercan grlfriends frm wrk are goign to the sexx shop on sunday to get sme nice stuff for our bdroom….im so proud of her…..
By MELO
September 11, 2008 3:34 PM | Link to this
Truth the 2.04 truth is what set her off.Mfcker mined her and dumbed her then she realizes he lied his azz off to her….
By MELO
September 11, 2008 3:35 PM | Link to this
NOBODY WANTS YOU NOOOBOODDYY!!!!
I call her old faithful…she my Queen…..
By Cemeeli
September 11, 2008 3:36 PM | Link to this
lol melo negro, you are cwazi!
By Dan
September 11, 2008 3:41 PM | Link to this
@ARed
I read the dichotomy of that post as I was writing it.
But the second chance is for I life I’ve known nothing about. But if I’ve offered to make a life or a relationship with you, you turn me down, and then wanna come back - that’s different.
While I don’t judge people on their past behaviors with others, how you interact with me is different.
You ran becuase “you were afraid of what I felt for you so quickly” and now “I’m not scared anymore, I see in you what I want”
For me…hindsight is 20/20…maybe in the next lifetime…
@MLL
Naw, you can talk about it all you want, but like it’s been stated…actions speak louder than words…get it?
By a daily lurker
September 11, 2008 3:41 PM | Link to this
I’m Swiss Maybe that says something about you? Don’t read more into my statement than necessary. We’ve all experienced. Tears, joy, hurt, sadness, about as much good as bad. Butterflies, sexual intimacy great dates and all. IMHO, has nothing to do with true love. I’m talking when we read dudes listing their buttload of must haves and laundry list of requirements. I’m talking about the no give and take. Bolting because she could only come up with 9 out of 10 items. You want to take a sista to Timbuktu(sp)and back, on a marathan before you decides if she passes or fails. Where’s the love in that? Sounds more like taking someone through the ringer/wringer (whichever). Just like I don’t need to have a laundry list for you, as we hear so often laced with all my emotions, neither should you for me. I don’t want to be dictated to by you and you get to determine whether or not I passed. I want my dictation from love….the long haul, stamina, the good and the bad. Actually it’s not even your person that make me do it. You know going through hell and highwater. When you didn’t know (not during the dreamy eyed stage but when you awake to reality) you had it in you to endure. And I’m not talking taking BS but seeing the other person through, daily. We’re talking about bolting if a woman can’t list in the spur of a moment what she brings to the table, but all in the same breath says it’s not an indication of anything material. Well, what the heck else is left? Let’s see a play by play of umm, I wash, cook, clean, make love, raise you kids, etc. That’s running a day to day household. That’s a given to do everyday with or minus the man. I would think on the real, it’s all inclusive and free flowing. My point being, if you want to know whether or not I have the staying power and stamina, only the test of time can tell. So if I get cut short because I can recite for you, do me just as big of a favor and keep it moving…as well. I guess I don’t understand rattling off prerequites being indicative of a good woman or a woman good for a relationship. Sometimes a good woman blossoms from pressures and ups and downs, as a result. Okay, fine, I’ll recite to you what you need, but where’s the insight? Don’t come back saying I was crazy because all I needed to do what pass the list test. I can make my mouth say anything. Problem being, for every BS man that’s a butt load of chicks and for every BS chick that’s a butt load of nodogooders.
Truth I’m with you on that men incapable of love thing. Thanks man. You dig where I was going with that.
By DasV
September 11, 2008 3:42 PM | Link to this
Leggs have to disagree… while the hotmamma vs melo has been more colorful… i found the dialogue betw m’k and atlguy more mentally stimulating. and i like that word:’barb’… i used to have barbs wit folk all the time… was quite the barbwire…. whew im glad im over that.
By Leggs
September 11, 2008 3:42 PM | Link to this
What’s even more funny is he’s not backing down! He’s been pelted with buck shot (is that what it’s called) and is still standing!
By The Truth
September 11, 2008 3:43 PM | Link to this
melo I read that. funny
to think all this entertainment is free. LOL
By Hot Mama
September 11, 2008 3:44 PM | Link to this
MELO
Me and u aint shyte, we aint cool, we aint hot…we just aint nuthang, aint’ neva gon be nuthang, could never nuthang. Got dat ironing board head.
Prolly look like an African Cavity Creep/Yuck mouf.
By AmazonRed
September 11, 2008 3:45 PM | Link to this
So Dan, you’ve never wanted any girl you’ve dated back after making a mistake or getting scared? Have you ever been taken back?
By MLL
September 11, 2008 3:46 PM | Link to this
melo I’d rather stay proud…..but thanks for not being so stingy with yourself…
By Staceye AKA Black Mamba
September 11, 2008 3:46 PM | Link to this
Dayum the popcorn..I need a drink fro this fight between Hot Mama & Melo! LOL Ya’ll ‘bout to make a sista break her diet and have a piece of cake. This is osme party! LOL
By Wise Diva
September 11, 2008 3:48 PM | Link to this
Hot Mama, listen now, I said SETTLE down, there is enough fighting in the world. Let love rule! LOL
By Cemeeli
September 11, 2008 3:48 PM | Link to this
melo still tho’ …i feel so sorry for the Mrs.!
I call her old faithful…she my Queen…
Lol…she loves your foolery too, i guess.
By chakra7
September 11, 2008 3:49 PM | Link to this
Amazon Red Oh no, I wasn’t saying I don’t like football. I was saying in response to East Point’s comment about men wanting freedom and some women having a problem with that, that I know and have learned to give men that freedom, for ex., I know Sundays are his’ time because football is on from sun-up to sundown, and I can respect that. I may or may not watch, too, but I respect that space. Men zone out with sports, usually, so it’s if you can’t beat ‘em join ‘em or leave ‘em be in their zone.
By Leggs
September 11, 2008 3:50 PM | Link to this
I agree that it was more mentally stimulating, but if I’m going to witness a fight I want something that makes me say “oh no s/he didn’t”! Ok, yes, even I learned a few things from them.
By m'karyl
September 11, 2008 3:50 PM | Link to this
@DasV
Well you can not play the dozen with someone who ain’t fam…ya know…that is unfair…lol…otherwise…hey
By i'm swiss
September 11, 2008 3:54 PM | Link to this
@daily lurker — I wasn’t suggesting that you need to pass some dude’s silly laundry list test. But I can assure you there are men who are very capable of love. If you haven’t encountered them, maybe you’re just wasting time & energy on the wrong dudes?
By Hot Mama
September 11, 2008 3:56 PM | Link to this
Wise Diva
I do apologize for spitting venom all over the blog…but he gets on my mf nerves ev’day.
Ev’body else…I usually don’t behave like this but now and then some folk just got, to be got.
By Dan
September 11, 2008 3:57 PM | Link to this
@ARed
No. I have not been taken back, because I’ve never asked to be taken back.
I’ve made my mistakes realized the damage done and left the woman alone (with my apologies of course) to find love for herself.
For me, I’d rather just be the one that got away (if that’s what it is) than to have someone recognize their mistake and want to correct it.
That said, I’m not an azz about it, I listen and in all due respect and deference to their feelings say: “Thank you for the compliment, but I no longer feel that way about you. I wish you luck in life and love, truly. ….Deese”
By Beautiful
September 11, 2008 4:03 PM | Link to this
I live by intuition me and you both girlie.
atl guy i go back and forth on whether i should approach. i’m leaning more towards leaving it alone, cause the man says if we marry not me. it’s all on you kid!
hot azz mess mama you funny! lol.
where’s myhomie at?
If she had asked this yesterday, or recently, I would have said “Cater 2 U” by Destiny’s Child! Today I’m feeling Lauryn Hill’s “Ex Factor”
hang in there, but not too long.
By Wise Diva
September 11, 2008 4:04 PM | Link to this
LOL,Hot Mama, it looks like you got fed up, and I could FEEL the disdain. It’s ok, he really is the designated habitual line pusher on the blog, sometimes I have to just let him be the character he wants to portray because he works way too hard at it somedays, LOL. I bet Melo is a big ole softie at home!
blows air kisses at Melo
By Wise Diva
September 11, 2008 4:08 PM | Link to this
@ The Blogger formerly known as Kym, duly noted on your John Mayer comment. Good point
By Leggs
September 11, 2008 4:08 PM | Link to this
HotMama, very fitting moniker. You’re cool!
By Dan
September 11, 2008 4:09 PM | Link to this
Okay the …Deese was a joke
By MELO
September 11, 2008 4:10 PM | Link to this
on my mf nerves ev’day ohhh…u wl be like that for along timne then.. i feel so sorry for the Mrs she got a good man,trust me.She even married dwn,considering she came from sme monied background unlike me…but we making our own…so she must have seen smething…..
By MELO
September 11, 2008 4:13 PM | Link to this
mamba,fight is over,u late!! MLL,HOT and myself are going out for some tequila….join us if u like but guys bring ur own chics,no staring at my dble date……
By DasV
September 11, 2008 4:15 PM | Link to this
Leggs you and M’K cracking me up. i forgot to say that i was using my commentor’s voice with my last post… and now that M’K has joined the commentator table, her spat with ATLguy is not up for discussion. i agree with you M’K… you cant play the dozens with anyone not family… theres the lack of home advantage for starters. i would like to comment on the cleverly phrased insults and the un-phased reaction by Melo… what does it say about our society that blatant dislike does dissuade advances?? (LOL)
By AmazonRed
September 11, 2008 4:16 PM | Link to this
Dan, I get that it was a joke. Thanks for your response, by the way. While we’re on the topic tho, that whole “deese” thing doesn’t come of as rather “ghei” to you tho? LOL
By a daily lurker
September 11, 2008 4:18 PM | Link to this
I’m Swiss and whatever other person commented, trust me when I tell you (and no I don’t think I’m all that but it’s in my rearing), I don’t waste time. Not that I haven’t encountered experiences but wasting time? Never. Past experience, a learning curve. Please forgive me if I read like I cain’t get nobody. Not true. My statement about men being incapable of love and my subsequent post was not about me or women but your inabilities to bring it in all seriousness from the beginning. Not passing tests and trying the puddy, playing house and only get snagged by you because you were in that “I think I’m ready” cycle. Acutally what I just listed is pretty much what the vast of majority of women do for the SO. Even though sometimes a nodogooder ain’t deserving, most times I believe women work on good intentions. For the record, I have a suitor right now that is trying his bestest. His bestest at what though? I believe he REALLY cares, misses me and all that other stuff but guess what, if you veer off the path (and sometimes we can do that in still be a part of love), I just don’t have it in my to give you another go. I’m not perfect but I’m going to make every effort from day one. I’m not going to serious things up a notch after a revelation of “uh uh I might lose her/him.” Sorry if you don’t get where I’m coming from.
By Awwwwwwww...Dayum
September 11, 2008 4:20 PM | Link to this
Awwwwwwww…Dayum, MELO!!!
Too funny…She must have gotten played recently to come down on you like that…I don’t see where you’ve posted any differently..Reads like MELO to me.
By Cemeeli
September 11, 2008 4:21 PM | Link to this
she got a good man,trust me.She even married dwn, considering…
melo…Cee, has been seen through all that zulu mess! Lord, bless her.
By m'karyl
September 11, 2008 4:22 PM | Link to this
@DasV
Oh it can stay up for discussion…he probably thinks that I like him now…nope…my opinion about him in particular has not changed and it never willl…still do not like him…I am nice to dogs…and anything that smell like them when its wet too…caio.
By MELO
September 11, 2008 4:25 PM | Link to this
Awwwwwwww…Dayum there u go,but i aint liking ur rubbing it in like that….watch that kangaroo boomerang..
By Dan
September 11, 2008 4:26 PM | Link to this
@ARed
I don’t know…
I got is from Ricky Smiley…
And I only use it here (public forum, gentleman, so I can’t use the word that want to)
So no..I don’t think it’s (pause)
By Demi
September 11, 2008 4:28 PM | Link to this
@HOTMAMA what you told Melo on the sideline:
Noooooo, I ain’t bad, just don’t kiss no a$$ or take shyt And I’m a grown (wo)man, find you somebody to play wit If you’on like me when you see me, betta not say shyt I’ll choke yo a$$ out like Dre did that bish You betta tell these puddies they ain’t f*** wit no rookie I’m a Bankhead (Bish) n****, I’ll take yo cookiez!
So I’m outside of da club and you think I’m a puuuuuuuunk So I go to my loaded tech 9 that’s off in the truuuuuuuunk I told that muthaf/ka I ain’t never scared (east) I ain’t never scared (west)
By AmazonRed
September 11, 2008 4:31 PM | Link to this
got is from Ricky Smiley…
Dan, have you seen that fool? You sure you wanna be taking verbiage from the likes of him? LOL
Just jivin.
By Leon Phelps
September 11, 2008 4:32 PM | Link to this
It was good blogging with you folks today… enjoy your evening… and remember ” You can’t blame the wang!!!”
By Cemeeli
September 11, 2008 4:32 PM | Link to this
hey Demi. no slaving today, right?
By Awwwwwwww…Dayum
September 11, 2008 4:35 PM | Link to this
Awwwwwwww…Dayum, MELO!!
Dis is how I do, I call it as it is!! Now take yo…Awwwwwwww…Dayum moment fo what it is!! we all have an…Awwwwwwww…Dayum moment, so it is all in fun bruh!!
by
Awwwwwwww…Dayum
By MELO
September 11, 2008 4:35 PM | Link to this
Cee, has been seen through all that zulu mess! Lord, bless her. u can say that,im blessed!!!….u knw i bring my lunch to wrk,i dont even wash that lunch box after i empty it..i go in the break room and i see other american husbands busy, and fighting for space on the sink washing their lunch tins,lame men indeed…lol I’m with Truth,u afr-american females are enslaving these men…glad i got my lady-to-go when back there in goat/zebra/snake land…..
By Leggs
September 11, 2008 4:37 PM | Link to this
Leon Phelps, yeah you can blame the wang and thanks for a segway into my ending post for the day (if I make it in time)!
By Hot Mama
September 11, 2008 4:37 PM | Link to this
Awwwwww Daynum
If yo gon stir some shyte, at least us yo regular moniker. Don’t be scarrrred
By Demi
September 11, 2008 4:38 PM | Link to this
Cee nope just in no mood to blog…I have a lot on the mind.
Cuz a real man knows a real woman when he sees her And a real woman knows a real man ain’t afraid to please her And a real woman knows a real man always come first And a real man just can’t deny A womans worth
By Wise Diva
September 11, 2008 4:43 PM | Link to this
oh and The New Melo, I have posted way more lousier stuff then yesterday’s entry, LOL!! Thank you for pointing it out though. The commenters make the day go by, so whatever topic is hot or not hot, the community holds it all down. That’s why I love you all, even though some of us belong on medication, LOL
By Beautiful
September 11, 2008 4:44 PM | Link to this
i just realized something … i haven’t ate today.
hi cee & leggs! i hate that y’all leave me so early. i’m still not use to this.
hot mama from one hot azz mess to another … i like yo style mami.
waving
By Demi
September 11, 2008 4:44 PM | Link to this
Hot Mama Smile
I find bliss in ignorance Nothing seems to go away Over and over again shut up when i’m talking to you
I’m about to break
Everything you say to me Takes me one step closer to the edge And I’m about to break I need a little room to breathe Cause I’m one step closer to the edge And I’m about to break
By Leggs
September 11, 2008 4:46 PM | Link to this
Awww you singing to me Demi…JK, really I am!
By Dan
September 11, 2008 4:47 PM | Link to this
@ARed
Did the topic tug a heartstring or something? You’re a lot less irracible(sp?) today.
NBF, jus asking
By Cemeeli
September 11, 2008 4:47 PM | Link to this
melo…i don’t wash my lunch container at work either! hahaha…I simply wait ‘til i get home and stick that joint in the dishwasher! yep, there IS more to life, OKAY…my husband is going to be amazed at how much i’ve evolve into the “got the wifey tasks on lock SuzyHomaker”…lol…
btw - suggest to the building management to get a dishwasher for each floor…
By i'm swiss
September 11, 2008 4:48 PM | Link to this
daily lurker — You’re right, I have no idea where you’re coming from. All I can tell you is that not all guys are the same, and believe it or not, some of us are willing & able to “bring it in all seriousness from the beginning” when we meet the right woman. It’s all about finding the right person — but they are out there.
By Demi
September 11, 2008 4:49 PM | Link to this
Another place I find to escape the pain inside You don’t know the chances. What if I should die?! A place inside my brain, another kind of pain You don’t know the chances. I’m so blind!
Demi is now donning a dreaded wig and head banging with the best of them white boys
By AmazonRed
September 11, 2008 4:49 PM | Link to this
Great blog discussion today. I enjoyed it. And the rocks I had to throw at that boy has now turned to sand, well, maybe small pebbles. LOL
By Dan
September 11, 2008 4:49 PM | Link to this
I’m sorry I can’t help poking the sleeping bear
By Cemeeli
September 11, 2008 4:49 PM | Link to this
hi beautiful.
By ATL Guy
September 11, 2008 4:50 PM | Link to this
I’m glad MKary was put in check yesterday so I didn’t need to put her in her place Again. Blog was actually Chill Today!
Beautiful yup, its all on me, you’re right for sure!
By MELO
September 11, 2008 4:50 PM | Link to this
nite nite folks,Hot,MLL..luv u guys..u make my day go by so fast…till tmrw,anther day,anther $$$$$
By Leggs
September 11, 2008 4:51 PM | Link to this
Hey beautifull. You know you’re skinny, you better go eat!
Too funny, I the complete opposite, I alway wash my container out right after lunch. Never would I go home w/it dirty (unless the water didn’t work in the bldg.).
By AmazonRed
September 11, 2008 4:55 PM | Link to this
You’re a lot less irracible(sp?) today.
Dan - It’s irascible and maybe your the one that’s a lot less of it today. Same old day for me, other being annoyed by that boy. As for topic it generated the same reaction as usual.
By Leggs
September 11, 2008 4:57 PM | Link to this
Goodnight everyone!
Dedicated to Mr. Phelps
*All these trifling a$$ dudes need to do is stop sticking their dipsticks in just anybody’s oil. That will cut down on quite a bit of the hurt walking around out there.
Peace!
By Wise Diva
September 11, 2008 4:57 PM | Link to this
LOL, I would not say it was really “chill” today, Atlguy, it was kind of brutal, in a “smackdown too good to not laugh at” kind of way.
I did enjoy the discussion, great job everyone!
Have a great night!
By Cemeeli
September 11, 2008 4:57 PM | Link to this
Leggs i understand, i just have to use my time more wisely. Hey, i usually don’t bring my lunch, and so when i do i forget my container is even around.
I have to manage my time more, than using 5-10min at the dishwasher. Trust i conserve too, i don’t wanna use up that water either. :)
Ya’ll be good.
By Leggs
September 11, 2008 5:00 PM | Link to this
BTW, that last post came from Staceye. Told her I was going to use it and forgot to put her name on it.
By Demi
September 11, 2008 5:08 PM | Link to this
Leggs that sounds like some mess she would say, LOL.