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DEL.ICIO.USAmerica’s favorite couple
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
They say that real love is enduring, but sometimes it’s hard to believe that, especially since “’til death do us part” doesn’t seem to mean anything anymore.
But at least one couple is going against the odds when it comes to staying in it for the long haul. For their story, click here.
Who do you think is America’s favorite couple? Do you know other stories of Atlantans who have defied the norm by making it through particularly difficult times?
When have you stuck by your significant other during a difficult stretch? When has someone sacrificed part of his or her life to support you?
Happy Friday!
Permalink | Comments (344) | Post your comment | Categories: Relationships
Comments
By Jazzyone
March 7, 2008 8:25 AM | Link to this
One of the most imfamous couples to date for me is Ozzie Davis and Ruby Dee. It was sad to see the passing of Ozzie a few short years ago. Thats the couple that lasted through the test of time for me.
By Beautiful
March 7, 2008 8:39 AM | Link to this
i would have to say that my dad and step-mom had the marriage which defines till death due us part. he married her when she was in her early twenties. soon after she was diagnosed with Lupus. she died when she was about 35ish. it was tough for him. but for him to stay with her like that was awesome!
i have to vent
Dan will there be a second date with Brite? cause you know she asked BigD to join her for lunch!
By rrticulate1
March 7, 2008 8:41 AM | Link to this
I agree with the first post, and I’d add Paul Newman and Georgia native Joanne Woodward to the list.
By Demi
March 7, 2008 8:48 AM | Link to this
Shiddddddd, I casting my lot for:
Musing Raqi Du
May each of their marriages defy time and negative images of black marriages
And Will better treat my ex wife Jada correct!!!
or I’ll go George Jefferson on his a$$
By Beautiful
March 7, 2008 8:55 AM | Link to this
demi did you know that jada and will are swingers?
By Darrell (www.blackthen.com)
March 7, 2008 8:55 AM | Link to this
Morning, all. :-)
I read that article yesterday and the thing that jumped out to me is the contrast in attitudes between this couple and most of us who date.
It’s quite comical how some of us will label as a “sacrifice” the little “gives” and “takes” we’re asked to make in relationships. It’s as if the slightest little adjustment we’re asked to make on behalf of our mate generates the same feelings within us as if we were in the dentist’s chair getting a root canal done. The real beauty of what this couple is doing is not simply that they’re making these sacrifices for one another, but that they’re doing so volitionally, without regard to their own individual needs. That’s the one thing that stood out to me.
By Hotlanta
March 7, 2008 9:00 AM | Link to this
I don’t have a favorite couple. To me sometimes that is just a personna. Remember when everyone call Brad/Jen America’s favorite couple. On the front of every magazine smiling and going on to the public. They probably got home and cursed each other out. Then they got divorced everyone was like I thought they were so happy. Just because a couple is together doesn’t quote/unquote make them successful. People stay together for different reasons besides love. Remember when Juanita/Meeks was the quote/unquote Christian couple trying to set an example that everyone to follow. If Jada/Will was to get a divorce folks would go crazy as if it was them getting a divorce because they have label them the “IT” couple. Being labeled the “IT” couple is sometimes the kiss of death. People are spending so much time trying to out couple everyone else instead of just plain ole loving each other.
By BriteEyez
March 7, 2008 9:01 AM | Link to this
I would have to say that my grandparents are the epitome of enduring love. They have been married for 62 years and they love is still so evident you I watch how sweet and tender they are with each other. It always gives me hope that True, everlasting love is a possibility.
Beautiful I think you are spending wwwaaayyyy too much time being concerned about what Dan and I are going to do. From Darrell’s response I have surmised that he is more impressed with your non-approach so don’t worry, your crush is safe.
By QC
March 7, 2008 9:01 AM | Link to this
Morning Bloggers
Demi…you are a mess, if you go out flying through downtown stop by to see i’ll buy you lunch..
Morning Brother…hey Miss Beautiful
By Sybil
March 7, 2008 9:03 AM | Link to this
Beaut* - How do you know that they are swingers? Is this gossip that you are repeating? or Is this something you have personal knowledge of?
By pisces 08
March 7, 2008 9:06 AM | Link to this
Morning All. According to an article in the AJC, there are prostitutes charging $5500.00 an hour. I’m wondering what they do….
By Mo (now known as Moeisha)
March 7, 2008 9:08 AM | Link to this
Morning All and Happy Friday!
My parents & my ex in-laws are my models/heroes. My parents have been married since my mom was 19yrs old! Pulling in after them, my grandparents, Ossie & Ruby Dee, Will & Jada, Samuel & Latanya Jackson, Tom Hanks & his wife and Bill & Camille Cosby.
Hey Demi
By SexyCool
March 7, 2008 9:10 AM | Link to this
mo…i will add denzel and paulette to your list…
By Page1908
March 7, 2008 9:13 AM | Link to this
There is no “America’s Favorite Couple”. I do agree that there are couples who seem to have it together, such as Denzel and his Wife and Will and Jada. I used to think Babyface and Tracey Edmonds were a nice couple, but look what happened to them…lol.
By Beautiful
March 7, 2008 9:13 AM | Link to this
Brite let me just state this! Dan and BigD shouldn’t be dragged into this blog hook-up game you’re playin’. they deserve better than that.
Sybil will’s ex-wife lives just down the street from them and when he feels like hittin’ it he’ll sleep over. jada doesn’t mind a bit.
By Jazzyone
March 7, 2008 9:13 AM | Link to this
Parents have been married for over 40 years so they come in second after Ossie and Ruby Dee…I should be flogged for spelling their names incorrectly LOL…
By pisces 08
March 7, 2008 9:14 AM | Link to this
…On topic, my parents were my “blueprint” 40 plus years.
By Binford2K8
March 7, 2008 9:14 AM | Link to this
Once I was asked by my SO at the time if she got really ill or lost limbs would I stick by her. I stumbled my words because I had never thought about it and she got upset.
As I’ve gotten older, my thought is that if you jump in the foxhole with someone that you fight to the death with them. But part of me doesn’t know how I’d react to something truly life-altering. I doubt I’m alone in my doubt.
What say you?
p.s. anything going on this weekend?
By Simp
March 7, 2008 9:17 AM | Link to this
Hey Mo. I like your list. But I would take Bill out. It’s good it’s still stands by him. Hank and Billye are my favorites.
By Sybil
March 7, 2008 9:18 AM | Link to this
Again - my question is how do YOU know that since you state is so confidently as fact?
By Mo (now known as Moeisha)
March 7, 2008 9:19 AM | Link to this
Hey Page1908 You know I never really got a good vibe from Babyface & his wife, same with Eddie & his ex-wife. Something about them didnt seem right. You just never know what is going on with folks though. Just like some people didnt know that at one time Ossie & Ruby Dee had an open marriage. I would have never thunk it!!
By QC
March 7, 2008 9:19 AM | Link to this
Hey Page
By pisces 08
March 7, 2008 9:19 AM | Link to this
…On topic, my parents were my “blueprint” 40 plus years.
By pisces 08
March 7, 2008 9:20 AM | Link to this
…On topic, my parents were my “blueprint” 40 plus years.
By Coach Blue_Kolla
March 7, 2008 9:20 AM | Link to this
*Good Morning Blog…
My favorite couple is my moms and pops. They got together when she was 17 and he died when she was 62. …miss ya daddio :(
Fish I’m wondering what they do…
They don’t do jack, but charge high prices and only fugg those who’ll pay it. It’s called being exclusive.
You want to get rich, raise your prices and get a few big named big shots to sign on… then watch as e’rybod else sells the farm to get one of what you’re sellin’.
By Page1908
March 7, 2008 9:23 AM | Link to this
Mo Yes, that is true. That is what I say there is no america’s favorite couple. These, as someone mentioned earlier, should be people we know personally, like our families and friends. My parents have also been married for a long time, along with several aunts, uncles, etc. Those are my favorite couples.
Open marriages are more common that we’d all like to think.
Blog Question How many of you have been married more than once? How many of you have more than one baby mama/daddy?
By BriteEyez
March 7, 2008 9:24 AM | Link to this
Beautiful “blog hook-up” is your interpretation. When you assume you know other people’s intentions you make an a* out of yourself. Not that an explanation is necessary or actually even any of your business I will say my intention is to meet new people and form new friendships so, no games here. Hope that clears it up for YOU. If not, too bad because I’m done with that!!
By Simp
March 7, 2008 9:26 AM | Link to this
I have a question. Do you think we are a reflection of our parents? My mom has never been married. I am 40 plus and never been married. There have been stories about Will and Jada. Slbil she just repeating what she heard. It’s friday lighten up for crying out loud. Open marriage. Dayum I didnt know that.
By Darrell (www.blackthen.com)
March 7, 2008 9:26 AM | Link to this
Binford
Per your 9:14, the fact that you will have decided to “get in the foxhole” with her at all (when/if that time comes) is the most important thing, I think. The particulars of how you’d “deal” with it once you’re actually in the foxhole is secondary. Kind of like that “I don’t know how we’ll get through it, but we will somehow” attitude, ya know?
By Darrell (www.blackthen.com)
March 7, 2008 9:31 AM | Link to this
Page “Blog Question How many of you have been married more than once? How many of you have more than one baby mama/daddy?”
By Jakki
March 7, 2008 9:32 AM | Link to this
Lots of people use a illness or sickness as an excuse to divorce. I say stay married til one of you dies and then you are my hero!!!!!!!!!!!!!
By melo
March 7, 2008 9:34 AM | Link to this
Sybil good questions,i hate gossip, period! happy friday blogers and blogettes!! Hey Das Observation:put some attractive women in an room, sprinkle in a few elible men,the wmen start fighting for territory when they see themselves being passed over..see:..Dan and BigD shouldn’t be dragged into this blog hook-up game you’re playin’. they deserve better than that. watch this space!!
By melo
March 7, 2008 9:34 AM | Link to this
Sybil good questions,i hate gossip, period! happy friday blogers and blogettes!! Hey Das Observation:put some attractive women in a room, sprinkle in a few elible men,the wmen start fighting for territory when they see themselves being passed over..see:..Dan and BigD shouldn’t be dragged into this blog hook-up game you’re playin’. they deserve better than that. watch this space!!
By Mo (now known as Moeisha)
March 7, 2008 9:35 AM | Link to this
Simp Do you think we are a reflection of our parents? I have often wondered that same thing. I tend to think yes just b/c I see so much of both of my parents in me. At the same time, I dont know everything about my parents relationship so I can only go on what I have taken in as their child, knowing that I am still on the outside lookin in
By Page1908
March 7, 2008 9:35 AM | Link to this
Hey QC!
Darrell thanks. I think someone asked are we a reflection of our parents, and perhaps we are. It’s just sad when people judge single parents, when they themselves have illegitimate kids, too.
By AmazonRed
March 7, 2008 9:38 AM | Link to this
Happy Friday everyone. I’m ready to get my social butterfly on. I just hope the weather clears up.
Ahh…Ossie and Ruby. He was a known philander and which contributed to her alcoholism. But yes, “they stiillll together.” I guess true love means dealing with each others demons, but also looking the other way.
I don’t have a favorite couple. There are couples I admire for their tenacity, and commitment, but you never know what’s going on behind those doors.
Beautiful - Don’t turn into the new Rell. It was just lunch. Why are you so curious?
By Darrell (www.blackthen.com)
March 7, 2008 9:38 AM | Link to this
Simp
To a certain extent, I think we are a reflection of our parents, but that reflection is comprised both of positive and negative attributes, I think.
For example, in my case I would count as a positive “parental reflection” what I took on from my late father regarding his work ethic. However, on the other hand, I made a conscious decision not to take on other behaviors of his, such as smoking and drinking (both of which he ceased to do later on in life.)
By Darrell (www.blackthen.com)
March 7, 2008 9:41 AM | Link to this
Page “It’s just sad when people judge single parents, when they themselves have illegitimate kids, too.”
Cosign. ^5! ;-)
By Jazzyone
March 7, 2008 9:42 AM | Link to this
Its also interesting how others judge marriages when they aren’t married themselves. The question was marriages that stood the test of time thru all odds not the inner workings of them.
By Cemeeli
March 7, 2008 9:43 AM | Link to this
Morning Gang!
Who do you think is America’s favorite couple? MoBettaDreams
By Simp
March 7, 2008 9:45 AM | Link to this
Page Why place that stigma on the kids. I call the parents illegitimate. Mo ^5
By Binford2K8
March 7, 2008 9:46 AM | Link to this
Marriage and kids - makes me shudder to even imagine a day. If there is a Baby Binford, all of you on e the Blog better be right with God. ;p
I’m not kidding!
By The Truth
March 7, 2008 9:48 AM | Link to this
It’s 9:30 and a blog skirmish already. LMAO
I can’t say I’d stay with a chick thru thick and thin because if she stopped fugging me I’d be out like last weeks trash. I say lets take it one day at a time.
On america’s favorite couple, gotta be my neighbors. They’ve been together 40+ and make it look cool. They’re from another time and place tho.
On staying thru tough times, death of children/close, ones, illness is another cause of divorce. To much pressure on folks.
Beautiful is it Darrell. Step to ol boy. You two would be a good match. Ahh shucks, romance in blogsville.
By Page1908
March 7, 2008 9:48 AM | Link to this
Simp It’s not a stigma. It’s just reality.
By Coach Blue_Kolla
March 7, 2008 9:50 AM | Link to this
Mo I am still on the outside lookin in.
You said a mouthful. That’s with every relationship.
By Jazzyone
March 7, 2008 9:50 AM | Link to this
AMRED you had to step up in here with Rells name coming out your fingers that leads me to believe you dig him…seriously..don’t you ever get enough???
By 6'1 & luvinit (aka Don' it All)
March 7, 2008 9:53 AM | Link to this
Morning all!!!!!!
By Darrell (www.blackthen.com)
March 7, 2008 9:54 AM | Link to this
Truth ” can’t say I’d stay with a chick thru thick and thin because if she stopped fugging me I’d be out like last weeks trash.”
ROFLLMAO!!! Now wiping mouthful of water off laptop monitor.
By AmazonRed
March 7, 2008 9:55 AM | Link to this
Darrell - Great posts.
Jazzyone - I think you really dig me. Do you get enough of keeping my name in YOUR posts?
By Hotlanta
March 7, 2008 9:55 AM | Link to this
Mo, Bill & Camille. Didn’t he cheat on her with several women and they are stillllll together. Samuel also cheated on his wife. I remember in Essence how she said how she has to hold her tongue when he came home. Pahge 108 you are right Ozzie and Ruby did have an open marriage. The Mayor of Detroit should be at the top of your list also. Whoever did that hair knowing she was gonna be on national television should have been run outta town. Darrell don’t worry about folks judging single parents because looking at the show Super Nanny with mom/pops at home and can’t control their rugrats puts that case to mute.
By BriteEyez
March 7, 2008 9:55 AM | Link to this
“Blog Question How many of you have been married more than once? How many of you have more than one baby mama/daddy?”
Page Married only once (10 years)* with only child, with ny ex husband (a terrific 14 year old girl!) LOL!
By DasV
March 7, 2008 9:56 AM | Link to this
good morning good ppl
heeeyyyyy, Melo! how u dis wet morning??!
ON TOPIC: i enjoyed reading the article… it highlights the just how unselfish you have to be to maintain a relationship. i love the movie ‘50 first dates’…. it was clever and clearly shouted the my belief: you decide to love someone and care for them and its on a ‘no matter what’ basis….thats true loving. porgy and bess would have be in my list somewhere… wish art truly was an imitation of life.
By BriteEyez
March 7, 2008 9:56 AM | Link to this
“Blog Question How many of you have been married more than once? How many of you have more than one baby mama/daddy?”
Page Married only once (10 years)* with only one child, with ny ex husband (a terrific 14 year old girl!) LOL!
By BriteEyez
March 7, 2008 9:56 AM | Link to this
“Blog Question How many of you have been married more than once? How many of you have more than one baby mama/daddy?”
Page Married only once (10 years)* with only one child, with my ex husband (a terrific 14 year old girl!)
By SexyLeggs
March 7, 2008 9:57 AM | Link to this
Ozzie Daivs/Ruby Dee, Paul Newman/Joanne Woodard, Ronald Regan/Nancy Regan, The Wrights (co-workers of mine 39 yrs).
I definitely agree w/you Darrell, but that they’re doing so volitionally, without regard to their own individual needs. This is so endearing and one of the keystones to a lasting marriage.
By Rell
March 7, 2008 9:58 AM | Link to this
Just so you know, what works in some marriages does not work in others. There is something to be said for being honest with your mate…and having an open marriage takes that.
In 1948, Davis married actress Ruby Dee; in their joint autobiography With Ossie and Ruby, they later described their decision to have an open marriage.[2] They were well-known as civil rights activists, and were close personal friends of Malcolm X, Jesse Jackson, Martin Luther King Jr. and other icons of the era. Davis and Dee’s deep involvement in the movement is characterized by how instrumental they were in organizing the 1963 civil rights March on Washington for Jobs and Freedom, even to the point of serving as emcee. Davis, alongside Ahmed Osman, delivered the eulogy at the funeral of Malcolm X; he re-read part of this eulogy at the end of Spike Lee’s film Malcolm X. He also delivered the eulogy for Martin Luther King, Jr.
By Page1908
March 7, 2008 9:58 AM | Link to this
ARed LOLOL ctfu
Truth lol mean mugging
Binford lol @ Baby Binford…that’s soooo cute!
By DreamsMaterialize
March 7, 2008 9:58 AM | Link to this
Morning
My grandparents set the example for me.
Mo Wassup wit you this morning? Don’t hurt ‘em at work. lol
BTW I really don’t like the term “illegitimate children”. The phrase is historicallly outdated, and the connotation is negative. The CREATOR bestows legitimacy on all children, and no legal or socio-economic precedents can do otherwise. There are NO illegitimate children.
By 6'1 & luvinit (aka Don' it All)
March 7, 2008 10:01 AM | Link to this
I think when you have an open marriage it will last longer, no secrets.
By Rell
March 7, 2008 10:02 AM | Link to this
ajc is slow..the growth in there choice
http://marriage.about.com/od/quotes/a/ossierubyopen.htm
By Beautiful
March 7, 2008 10:05 AM | Link to this
SexyLeggs the Reagan’s are a great example!
By melo
March 7, 2008 10:05 AM | Link to this
I call the parents illegitimate. Mo ^5 I think whats illegitimate is the relationship, not the kids that are the by-product. Both my grandparents were my role models.They were both married for more that 60 years, at an era when they really married young.They endured the test of time. I grew up with my maternal grannies( may ur soul rest in peace grandpa)and their teachings are with me everyday.We are a reflection of our upbringing and the environment we were exposed to and the value systems our folks followed.So yeah, if ur folks were not married, they probably trashed married couples or those kind of relationships when u were young and u kind carry that by osmosis, without thinking much about it. Off to a lame duck meeting…for me at least!!
By Jazzyone
March 7, 2008 10:05 AM | Link to this
AMRED you would like to think that but Im noticing how you talk about how you can’t digest someones actions and start a post off like that yesterday and what do you do come up in here with his name coming out your fingers..its drama and I think Rell let it die yesterday and you come in and start the focus on you and that AGAIN today..like Tazz said yesterday I tend to think you like that attention… Then you say Rells attention was way off key and concerning to you he kept your name out his mouth and fingers yesterday and here you come doing what you despise so much….your behavior is questionable…
By Page1908
March 7, 2008 10:07 AM | Link to this
Dreams Do you like the phrase “out of wedlock” better?
By Cemeeli
March 7, 2008 10:08 AM | Link to this
Dreams
I really don’t like the term “illegitimate children”. The phrase is historicallly outdated, and the connotation is negative.
Amen.
Mo whassss up?
By AmazonRed
March 7, 2008 10:08 AM | Link to this
Simp - I hope I’m a reflection of my parents. I like the way they’ve navigated lifes ups and downs. Even during the times they can’t stand each other, they remember their vows and the bigger picture. Their 31st anniversary is next month.
Page - Never married, no rugrats.
That reminds me. For all of you folks that have been to the “marriage buffet” no 2nd helping (marriage) for you until the singles go thru the line! LOL
By Mo (now known as Moeisha)
March 7, 2008 10:08 AM | Link to this
Hotlanta yeah Bill cheated on Camille and Samuel was a junkie and cheater. And yes they are still together, but isnt that the topic, couples that have endured thru it all? Also what may be the straw to beak the camels back for some may not be as big an issue with someone else. Some women can forgive (overlook) a husband’s infidelity while another woman may have his ish on the curb before he can blink. We can all say what should have happened with celebrity couples but they made the decisions based on what they know goes on in their homes, not what the media gives us.
By The Truth
March 7, 2008 10:11 AM | Link to this
Melo Observation:put some attractive women in an room, sprinkle in a few elible men,the wmen start fighting for territory when they see themselves being passed over..see:..Dan and BigD shouldn’t be dragged into this blog hook-up game you’re playin’. they deserve better than that. watch this space!!
Thank you
By Staceye
March 7, 2008 10:11 AM | Link to this
Binford I co-sign your 9:46. I told my friends and family if I get married or even worse…have a kid…theh Hell has finally gotten a snow day! I have the attention span of a 2 year old (adult ADHD) so I get bored easily.
**These old couples that we look up too I have come to realize it was not love that kept them together…it was fear of change and starting over, separation anxiety, do not believe in divorce, or the mindset of who would want me now anyway. So I can not say just because a couple has been married for 50+ years that it is love. I have seen it where the man would slut himself around town (leaving b******* in his path)then he got older and got sick and the woman not stayed with him..but cared for him. No way in hell would I allow a man to do that to me…if I stayed it would be to torture his azz for humilating me and forsaking the vows he took mainly, Keep unto each other”! As a girl you are brainwashed into thinking that love is the top of all whne you look at grandparents and other long term couples. But when you get the mega dose of reality…you come to know you have been had…hoodwinked…bamboozled…snowed and verbally screwed!
By Darrell (www.blackthen.com)
March 7, 2008 10:12 AM | Link to this
SexyLeggs “This is so endearing and one of the keystones to a lasting marriage.”
I agree, and for me it is the keystone to a lasting relationship/marriage.
I’m reminded of a topic from last week’s WiseDiva blog about “Dating with a Mirror” and reading the article Bella posted today caused me to reflect back on that whole “mirror” concept. In looking at how many times I - and some of us - “say” how we’re willing to give ourselves “wholeheartedly” to someone, however, there’s usually a “but” somewhere to follow. Yeah, we “talk” a good game, but more often than not, we don’t really mean it. It just “feels good” for us to say stuff like that as if a mantra we’ve taken from the book of “10 Things You’re Supposed to Say to Your Mate”.
But that’s is not the case with this couple, though. They, along with many others mentioned on here today, understand the relationship principle of “putting the other person and their needs first”. Sure, it’s often easier said than done, but it can be done. This couple has proven it.
By AmazonRed
March 7, 2008 10:13 AM | Link to this
Jazzyone - I don’t care what you think. I don’t care what you’ve concluded about my behavior. The sooner you accept that, the easier your time here will be. So keep it moving or ignore me all together. Your choice! I won’t be changing one iota of myself because you wanted to comment. Get a clue.
But, I hope you feel better getting your useless rant off of your chest.
By Raqi
March 7, 2008 10:14 AM | Link to this
Morning.
The couple that I admire the most is my friend Doc and her husband. They have been married for 17 years. Within that 17 years they separated for one year after the first five. They came to terms with their mistakes, reunited and have been going strong for the past 12 years. I really admire their interaction with each other. You would think they were 20 year old newly weds, but they are in fact 44 and 47 year olds making it last. I have known Doc for five years and I can say their relationship is consistent. No matter what environment or situation I see them in, they are we they are. She gives me good advice and don’t spare her tongue telling me the mistakes that she has made. She also shares with me the good of her relationship and how she (they) keep it strong. I would vote for her.
My mom and dad had a good relationship. Married 42 years. My mom gave really good advice but being their child I could only see within their bonds to a certain extent. Only what she allowed us to see and allowed us to hear.
We are working to have an admirable relationship. One that family and friends can look on and say “They prevailed. Gracefully.”
As far as celebrity marriages go…no one knows the whole story. About like on here, I tell what I want to tell and that I don’t I keep to myself. However I do hope that some of the things I do reveal (the interactions of dealing with obstacles) can shed a little light in somebody’s world. :-)
P.S. IMO a good relationship is one where shyt happens and we overcome.
By Mo (now known as Moeisha)
March 7, 2008 10:16 AM | Link to this
Hey Dreams, now you know its friday so my patience with the co-workers is slim to none! I dont play dat on fridays, you liable to get cut messin with me today!! LOL
Hey Cemeeli, can a sista get a now-n-later? Pineapple please, I know you got some hidden somewhere. :0)
By Rell
March 7, 2008 10:18 AM | Link to this
@mo…..i agree…..
folks dont know they just assume based on there belief system. To assume that someones husband/wife is bad is based on what they believe a husband/wife should act like….so i agree with your post
By AmazonRed
March 7, 2008 10:19 AM | Link to this
However I do hope that some of the things I do reveal (the interactions of dealing with obstacles) can shed a little light in somebody’s world. :-)
Raqi - They do and I thank you. Though I respect my parents and grandparents marriages, they are from a different time with different challenges than today! So I always like to hear insight from younger marrieds navigating thru the marriage waters of today.
By Simp
March 7, 2008 10:19 AM | Link to this
Staceye I agree with you about staying together for fear of change. Look how long it took Juanita Jordan to divorce. Back in the days, couples turned their heads and pretended not to see whats going on. Today, divorces is like McDonalds 24/7.
By melo
March 7, 2008 10:20 AM | Link to this
P.S. IMO a good relationship is one where shyt happens and we overcome. yes..yes..yes!
By Jazzyone
March 7, 2008 10:21 AM | Link to this
AMRED Just an observation and the feeling is mutual but if you call someone else out remember the finger is pointing back at you when you high jack a public forum with your tirade and drama grow up already young lady. Change from a blog gosh I hope not…This is a blog so you get responses…Have a nice day though LOL..
By Page1908
March 7, 2008 10:22 AM | Link to this
ARed LOLOL girl, that’s hilarious!
Cee where is my Ring Pop? Are you going to Cozy Cone this weekend?
By The Truth
March 7, 2008 10:24 AM | Link to this
Married once, no kids.
We’re all speculating on what causes a good marriage but noone has a clue. Ozzie with some other chick would of bounced on day 2. There’s no manual to this thing so the best you can do is wing it. Hell, even the experts are getting divorced. LOL
Today you have an opportunity to interact with your mate. Based on your actions you may have an opportunity tomorrow. Make the wrong decision and you have no tomorrow. Thats the joy of life, it’s like rollinig the dice. The same folks that say they want a longterm relationship would bolt if they were “forced” to be with their loved one forever. Y’all have been reading to many romance novels.
It’s a crap shoot out here, always has been and always will be.
By Got that?
March 7, 2008 10:26 AM | Link to this
AMRED, listen for the pop…
By AmazonRed
March 7, 2008 10:27 AM | Link to this
Jazzyone - Again, comment on what you’d like. Doesn’t mean it’s gonna make a ripple in the stream. Grow up yourself and stop worrying about me. News flash, hijacks are unsuccessful if no one pays attention or comments! But yeah, since you wanna focus on me, at least your picked a good subject. ;-)
Be easy.
Page1908 - You keep me giggling!
By Staceye
March 7, 2008 10:29 AM | Link to this
**I think open marriage is DISGUSTING! Why get married if you still want to do your own thing…oh let me guess…companionship!?! Get a pet! That is how AIDS is killing married woman & men…because you think when you get married then its no holds barred, no condoms…but now you as a married person has to still take HIV tests because your SO is out there schlong-slinging or diznick dipping is just the worse. Again..we all know condoms do NOT prevent everything so when you are out there getting it in with that cutie..you risk your life and that of your SO and could leave your children to be orphans all because you were not woman/man enough to control your carnal urges! Is it worth it?
By SexyLeggs
March 7, 2008 10:29 AM | Link to this
The phrases, or rather mindset out of wedlock, illegitimate, b******* child also guided me to getting married. I am so old school that the stigma from the 40’s and 50’s still rest in my mind, and I didn’t want my child to be catergorized as such. I realize this type of thinking is outdated This is the 21st century, but I was looking at yesteryear and the belief that everyone should bear the same last name. The marriage would have worked if we were both on the same page. When thinking about taking my maiden name back I too went back to the thinking of yesteryear that the child have the same last name as its parents. I almost got stuck in this thinking but soon realized there are a lot of children that do not have the same last name of both parents. Taking my name back was also taking my independence back (after a lot of talking with my daughter).
Sorry, back to regularly scheduled programming.
By Beautiful
March 7, 2008 10:30 AM | Link to this
Truth what are your/the positive reasons to marry?
By Rell
March 7, 2008 10:30 AM | Link to this
@Truth
There’s no manual to this thing so the best you can do is wing it.
you said it all right there….
By Mo (now known as Moeisha)
March 7, 2008 10:35 AM | Link to this
Page1908 you know my stats, married once, one beautiful lil mo.
Rell the things one learns once you grow up! LOL Marriage is one of those things that really no one can tell you about outside of surface stuff. I often said I wish someone would have given me the real deal at all those dayum bridal showers instead of:
communicate
dont go to bed mad
be patient
compromise
How about telling me that some days I will wake up and want to roll his azz down the stairs? LOL Or how about telling me that I will have those moments where I really have to ask myself is this something I can deal with (forgive and move forward) or is this a deal breaker? Some folks dont believe that sometimes what you think you can handle, you find that you cant and vice versa. and no, you dont know it all before you get married. So when I look at these celebrities I always think “that was their relationship and nobody knows what went on but them”.
By Page1908
March 7, 2008 10:35 AM | Link to this
Staceye LOL girl, don’t get your Spanx all in a bunch today…lol.
ARed Girl……you are so bananas!
Beautiful LOL…lawd, who told Aretha she could rock that strapless dress at the Grammy’s? LOLOL
By Cemeeli
March 7, 2008 10:35 AM | Link to this
Mo don’t cut ‘em. You just keep on bloggin’…it’s helps.
Page…here you go, rappleberry blinkin’ Ring Pop. Funny you asked about Cozy Cone my pregnant co-worker “cut work” <—this means = had a lunch already then leave again) yesturday she went to get us a ice-cream.
By Rell
March 7, 2008 10:37 AM | Link to this
Not to get off topic…but this morning the hood finally arrived out in stn mtn….i mean a dayum drive by in a residential nieghborhood…now you have to wonder if three street over your nieghbors are behaving…automatic fire travels far….
americas fav couple
SUPERMAN AND LOUIS LANE…how long have those too been going at it
@beautiful…the positives change or go away as time goes on…..same thing that you feel in love with year one…maybe the thing that gets on your nerves year 10…so it depends..for men anyway…cant speak on it from a females POV
By Beautiful
March 7, 2008 10:41 AM | Link to this
Page the mirror. lol. my co-worker said lil momma looks a hot mess. i think she looked cute.
By Rell
March 7, 2008 10:44 AM | Link to this
@Mo….i was told..marriage will be the first time you SERIOUSLY considering killing someone…and that was told to me by someone married and an elder in the church..how is that for truth..
By Simp
March 7, 2008 10:44 AM | Link to this
To the people that are divorce. What do you think you could have done different that would have changed the outcome of your marriages?
By DreamsMaterialize
March 7, 2008 10:45 AM | Link to this
Mo don’t let the co-workers get at you on a friday. Matter of fact, just let me know if you want me to handle it. lol
Page1908 I definitely prefer “out of wedlock”. Illigitimacy ,as it refers to children, stems from the European notion that a child born to unmarried parents did not have a LEGITIMATE legal claim to the estate of the father.
By Page1908
March 7, 2008 10:46 AM | Link to this
Beautiful LOL girl, I was like WTF! I know if she can get her girls in there, I know I can get mine into something strapless, too…lol
Mo LOL lil Mo is soooooooooo adorable! I will babysit one day…lol
Cee LOL I am craving some Cozy Cone right now for real. She should have brought me some, too…lol
By The Truth
March 7, 2008 10:51 AM | Link to this
Beautiful since you asked. I think to have children. Really thats the only long term excuse to be together. Maybe for business reasons. Whoever marries for love only is rolling the dice, and will likely get burned.
Look at Hugh Hefner, never realy settles down but keeps it flowing. I’ve never seen that dude without a smile on his face.
Lets start a “term marriage” program. You can do 3, 5, or 7 years. Then if all is cool you can re-enlist for another tour of duty. If not you get an honorable discharge and you’re free to bolt. What say you?
Simp not a dam thing. That thing went down the way it was supposed to. Whatever I had to go thru to get to this moment right here is worth it. Had we stayed together I’m sure I wouldn’t of been able to have the great experiences I did.
By Willie Dynamite
March 7, 2008 10:53 AM | Link to this
Morning All,
Mo That 10:35 is the closest we’ll get to any manual. That right there summed up everything. Marriage is hands down the hardest thing I’ve EVER done. Wouldn’t trade it in fo nothing tho.
Similac Is the Bar opening up early today? I thought I smelled popcone!!Lmao already
Rell aka Lester Hayes I’ve heard many folks say that. The Old cats that I consider mentors always told me that.
By Staceye
March 7, 2008 10:53 AM | Link to this
Page they are twisted all up in there girl! LOL
Hi Beautiful…how are ya? Sexyleggs..what’s up? Where the heck is Slim? Mo where’s my pepsi? Cemeeli…go ahead girl you hitting the gym today?
By Beautiful
March 7, 2008 10:56 AM | Link to this
Page if she think she look good, then that type of situation will continue to happen. smh. my co-worker also hated on Beyonce’s dress on how it shows to much a$$. why do women hate on attractive females?
By BriteEyez
March 7, 2008 10:59 AM | Link to this
Simp
“To the people that are divorce. What do you think you could have done different that would have changed the outcome of your marriages?”
For myself, there are lots Of things that I know I could have done differently but I can’t say that I believe any of that would have changed the eventual outcome. There was tremendous growth and self awareness that I gained from my marriage and I feel that it was all very instrimental to me becoming the person I am today, and I LOVE who I am at this point in my life. I was 22 years old when I got married and I had very limited knowledge about the world or life. I had just finished college and I wanted to be married so I got married. In retrospect, I know that my marriage was something that my ex husband and I put together, not God. But for those of us that believe in God we know that he uses all things for our good and a tremendous amount of good came out of my marriage( most significantly, my wonderful daughter) but I know that it was not meant to last forever. However, I am a huge fan of institution of marriage and would like to very much get married again.
By SexyLeggs
March 7, 2008 11:00 AM | Link to this
What would I have done differently??? I would have taken the pants off in the marriage and made (ask) him to wear them! Meaning put him in charge of providing for the survival of the family, not just me!
By Page1908
March 7, 2008 11:02 AM | Link to this
Beautiful LOL Beyonce’ is attractive, I am just tired of seeing her with that blonde wig/weave on all the time.
By Darrell (www.blackthen.com)
March 7, 2008 11:02 AM | Link to this
Beautiful “dress…shows to much a$$”
That statement right there is an oxymoron to any man. A dress can never show too much a$$. LOL!!!
By Beautiful
March 7, 2008 11:02 AM | Link to this
hey Staceye! just a little irritated this morn. thanks for letting me borrow your ear.
Truth i’m half with you on that. what do you think about shacking up? people look down on that and i don’t know why. well, i have an idea.
By Mo (now known as Moeisha)
March 7, 2008 11:05 AM | Link to this
Staceye now you know I always got a pepsi for ya girl! And its friday!! Here have one!! Mo tosses Staceye a pepsi
WillieD now I would definitely do marriage again. But I wish someone would have given me the advice you and Rell heard. I kept asking for it straight no chaser but kept gettin the fairytale stuff.
Dreams they wont get me today but if I need you for backup I know where to find ya! ;0)
Page1908 thanks for the compliments on lil mo! :0) I may have to take you up on that babysittin! He likes basketball too so you guys would be fine!! lol
Simp What do you think you could have done different that would have changed the outcome of your marriages? I dont think anything could have changed the outcome. We just werent supposed to be (IMHO). Our season ended. Now I learned alot and know somethings to do differently but I cant say those changes would have saved my marriage.
By Staceye
March 7, 2008 11:05 AM | Link to this
Beautiful why do women hate on attractive females? I ask the same question! If I see a womam who looks nice I will give her the due props..not tear her down because she takes time to actuallycare what she looks like.
Your hatin’ azz co-worker..what does she look like?
By Blow Me aka. Bomb 1st
March 7, 2008 11:05 AM | Link to this
Good Morning All
Wow…This is quite interesting. I see quite a few ppl on the blog naming CELEBRITY couples who have only been married under 15 yrs…WOW! This is striking…NO real life examples of a strong and long successful relationships??? That could be part of the problem here.
Well I come from a family where “til death do us apart” so I have quite a few. Parents, grandparents….Trying to make it last is the hardest part most usually say.
Simp I do feel like alot of the things we do are a reflection of our parents. That is if you parts had a running role in your life. But even still you can inherit a few traits without even being around.
PAGE never been married..and no KIDS.
By Beautiful
March 7, 2008 11:08 AM | Link to this
BigD trust me when i say that if i had a dress like that in my closet, i’m rockin’ it!
By Mo (now known as Moeisha)
March 7, 2008 11:11 AM | Link to this
BriteEyez In retrospect, I know that my marriage was something that my ex husband and I put together, not God. I AM ^5 ALL OVER THAT!!! That is exactly how I felt about my marriage! Glad to see someone that felt the same way…….
By Page1908
March 7, 2008 11:11 AM | Link to this
Staceye, Mo, LadyJ, Beautiful, Truth mail call folks…lol
QC Girl, that was a hot mess! lol
By Darrell (www.blackthen.com)
March 7, 2008 11:12 AM | Link to this
SexyLeggs “I would have taken the pants off in the marriage and made (ask) him to wear them! Meaning put him in charge of providing for the survival of the family, not just me!”
With all due respect, that wouldn’t have worked. In a marriage you can’t “put” someone in charge; they have to want to be in tha position. Leadership is leadership regardless if it’s in a marriage or in the workplace. If being a leader is not not already an innate trait within the man, it will never be. This is exactly why so many women (like yourself) who want their man to “wear the pants” are forced to wear them themselves - the absence of that innate character trait called leadership.
By Raqi
March 7, 2008 11:13 AM | Link to this
Page This is my second marriage, but the first was until death parted us. And my sons do have different fathers with my present husband not being either.
By Jay
March 7, 2008 11:14 AM |