Misadventures in Atlanta

By Definition

February 27, 2008 8:12 AM | Link to this

Succumb - to yield to superior strength or force or overpowering appeal or desire

By Rell

February 27, 2008 8:36 AM | Link to this

Men have the capacity to Lead two women at the same time…love, only one at a time…..one will be for love the other for lust…or they switch roles…and like definition stated…ya boy rich is way wrong on the succumb part..no man succumbs to a women….what part of the game is that

By pisces08

February 27, 2008 8:43 AM | Link to this

Morning All. I’m not really familiar with the succumb part, I disagree. I think it is possible for a man to love two women. The “love” will be of differing levels, and may/will include a lust factor. One woman may do to him the things he most desires. While the other may provide an inner need.

By Darrell (www.blackthen.com)

February 27, 2008 8:45 AM | Link to this

Morning, all. :-)

WiseDiva, with all due respect to your friend, I must disagree with his position that men don’t “fall” in love.

Men absolutely do “fall” in love, but whether we “fall” or “succumb” is simply a matter of semantics. As I see it, the larger issue here is not the difference between men and women relative to what we call the process of loving someone, but how we might differ in managing that process. And in that context, we’re ALL different - whether male or female. It’s how we handle the process that results in our loving (or not loving) the person, regardless of what label we attach to it.

To that end, yes, I think it is possible for a man to love two women, but I also think such a scenario does not bode well for the character of the man (or woman, such as the case may be.)

By Beautiful

February 27, 2008 8:47 AM | Link to this

Wow! Excellent question WiseDiva. I never really thought about my ex loving the women he cheated with. I mean, if he did love (her) them, he would have done for her as he did for me right? From what I understand, he needed someone who would listen to him more, like a therapist (and of course sex). After speaking with several of them, he went to them for what I didn’t provide. To a woman, that’s a lame excuse for cheating, but to a man it’s apparently a valid reason to be selfish. Throughout the eight years I don’t recall him coming to me and saying “this is what’s bothering me”. Fellas, would you or do you go to her and state what’s on your mind? Please do, cause we can’t read your mind. But no, I don’t think a guy can love two females at the same time.

By QC

February 27, 2008 8:50 AM | Link to this

Happy Hump Day Bloggers..enjoy!

By AmazonRed

February 27, 2008 8:59 AM | Link to this

Morning all. Hope you had a good birthday Darrell.

Good responses from the men thus far. I had no idea that men didn’t fall in love. Glad to see the fellas on here dispel that.

I’ve definitely had feelings for different guys at the same time, but I’ve never been in love with two people at the same time. From my experiences, I don’t think it’s really possible.

WiseDiva - I’d like to hear more about your friend Richard. He seems angry and/or bitter or something. Did he just get dumped or does he always make statements like that?

By Raqi

February 27, 2008 9:00 AM | Link to this

The whole truth and nothing but. In fact both women will be lied to. There is no way to equally love two people and one of them not get shorted. Questions of your whereabouts and actions will arise prompting one to lie thru their teeth or come clean. And I haven’t met a woman yet that will gladly accept a relationship where she has to share. Even when it’s a mistress it’s only a matter of time.

Now on men succumbing, my brother the psychoanalyst told me this when I sought his advice during my early days with the man, he said “man chooses to love whom he will”. After talking to him in depth I accepted what he had to say. Woman fall in love because it is in our nature to bond. We are nurturers by nature.

And Rell that’s just it. It is not part of the game. It is the truth. Some men grow up and ditch the “game” to have a meaningful relationship.

By kimmie

February 27, 2008 9:01 AM | Link to this

Rell & Truth - Okay, did you see Millionaire Matchmaker last night? The rollerskating guy was a trip! He did not want to take any suggestions, but HE is the one that is 39 & hasn’t been in a relationship in 10 years! He came to HER for help to find dates! And was it just me or did his date look alot like Ivana Trump?

On topic- I think one can love 2 people for different reasons, but I can’t see a deep “romantic” type of love going on with more than one person. JMHO

By Page1908

February 27, 2008 9:03 AM | Link to this

Rell are you serious? Why does everything have to be a game? smdh

By Darrell (www.blackthen.com)

February 27, 2008 9:05 AM | Link to this

Beautiful “Fellas, would you or do you go to her and state what’s on your mind?”

I absolutely do. I may have my faults and shortcomings, but communication isn’t one of them. At times, however, the ability to articulate my needs and concerns so “effectively” has been both a blessing and a curse for me, because I tend to “wear my emotions on my sleeves”, so to speak. Meaning, if something’s bothering me, you’ll definitely know it, and chances are you’ll never even have to ask me “Is something wrong?”

I’m just a firm believer that clear, unambiguous communication is the best thing for a healthy relationship, because all the other benefits of being together flow from that - being able to communicate openly and candidly to one another - without fear of reprisal.

By Rell

February 27, 2008 9:06 AM | Link to this

@beautiful..if every man told his women what was really on his mind..he would crush you as a women…we dont say things or just left things unsaid because we have the ability to adjust to the situation and we TRY and make it work in our favor..now the other side to this is how and when we meet you under what state of mind…because we may meet you in our “seeding” days and say we care but really dont..we just care about your sex or how you look on our arm….feel me…different stages..but please dont ask us to tell you what is on our minds because you will not like the answer…i had the question posed to me

Why do men go to strip clubs..by my SO…i said to look at what we dont have at home…..guess how that went over….yea not good…that attacked the self image….so i have learned to stop answering truthfully to idle questions

By Darrell (www.blackthen.com)

February 27, 2008 9:08 AM | Link to this

Thanks, Amazon, and yes, it was a good one. :-)

By SlimOne

February 27, 2008 9:08 AM | Link to this

kimmie & Truth I saw the Millionaire Matchmaker last night. Did you get the feeling that the guy from New Jersey seemed a little weird? His date also seemed a little fake to me. The Rollerskating kid was just that a grown azz Kid. And was he living in the Bates Motel???

By melo

February 27, 2008 9:09 AM | Link to this

One of the reasons there are so many cases of AIDS in some parts of Africa is becoz, culturally and customarily, having more than one wife is allowed.By extension, single men date more than one girl in some instances and it may be viewed as more like a badge of honor(not condemned in the strongest of terms)This applies even in non-Islamic countries where traditional customs allow more than one wife.So to answer ur qs Wise, yes it is possible for a man to love more than one woman.The customary restrictions in Europe and USA create this illusion(in my view) that it is not possible simply becoz the law enforces not having more than one woman when married.Our laws condition us men to have only one women but i think the fact that others even try to date more than one women(thru cheating) suggets that if given a chance,man can pull it off.I partly agree with Rell and Pisces on the lust factor but i must add that in other instances, u may truely love two pple differently and have a hard time choosing who to pick.I have not had the experience tho.The reason pple lie then Wise is becoz it is not the culturally and legally correct thing to do, and not so much about the feelings the man feels inside for the women involved.(if u get my drift) thanx Raqi on ur messge yesterday.

By Rell

February 27, 2008 9:11 AM | Link to this

@page/raqi…did not mean game literally, and out of all i typed that is all you can focus on…yea shake your head at yourself…

By Jazzyone

February 27, 2008 9:12 AM | Link to this

I truly believe that one can love more than one at a time. Been there done that..Its quite possible and some can, some can’t.

I agree with some men ditching the game and grow up or prepare themselves for something better in their lives. On their grown man looking for one on her grown woman.

By SexyLeggs

February 27, 2008 9:13 AM | Link to this

Good morning everyone. I’d like to apologize for throwing in that recipe yesterday when the vibe was flowing so well. Now, let me read to see what’s going on.

By Raqi

February 27, 2008 9:14 AM | Link to this

Page I know. Forget the flicking game. Grow the hell up and stop chasing cheap arse.

By The Truth

February 27, 2008 9:16 AM | Link to this

Having loved 2 women at the same time I know its possible. I dated a woman for a year and a half while stationed at Ft Stewart while being engaged to my wife. The women were exact opposites of each other but both very good at what they did. Really neither would have been a bad selection but both at the same time was heaven. Admittedly the second woman was more the lustful situation a few spoke of but I grew to love her just the same. She was more the friend/sex partner type while my ex was the straight wifey material.

By AmazonRed

February 27, 2008 9:18 AM | Link to this

The whole truth and nothing but. In fact both women will be lied to. There is no way to equally love two people and one of them not get shorted.

Raqi - Great point! I’m really interested to see if any guy on here can really claim they LOVED two women at the same time. Sounds like it could be a very painful experience.

By Page1908

February 27, 2008 9:20 AM | Link to this

Raqi ^5, I know, right! I mean come on, Rell. Yes, that is what I chose to focus on in your post, because that is what YOU chose to talk about on a daily basis on this blog. I’m just trying to understand why you haven’t been able to get passed that type of mentality. To me, it seems like a lot of work to be always thinking about the game. It would seem as though you would be tired of always having your brain consumed with rhetoric such as that on a regular basis. Doesn’t that get old after a while?

By Beautiful

February 27, 2008 9:21 AM | Link to this

BigD good morning. can i ask how old you are? i hope you had a wonderful birthday yesterday.

thanks for your response. do you think if would be overkill to go to him and ask him if he wants to talk ABOUT ANYTHING? It can be about work, friends, family, etc. this would be a great time to give a back massage so he can relax and feel comfortable.

By Raqi

February 27, 2008 9:25 AM | Link to this

Whitebread told me loved me. Even after we parted ways he said that he did truly love me. Part of me wanted to believe that, but the logical side of me said that he could not have because he was married to another. He was lying to both of us. But I gave him something that his wife didn’t and wouldn’t give him. I gave him a son. Not on purpose but it happened. In his last attempt to try to get me, he stated that fact and said he loved me for it. That dude is one charming, slick SOB.

melo what message are you speaking of?. The congrats? Yeah congratulations dude.

By Ga. Man

February 27, 2008 9:27 AM | Link to this

We as people…have an inner desire to fall in love. SOME may never admit it, but we all do

I think it is possible to Love two women at one time…like it has been stated already they both can give different things(Not saying it is right)

You have to Love yourself first and not be stupid, then others can see the true value in YOU this makes it easier for them to love you

By THE FILTHY VILLIANOUS DK

February 27, 2008 9:28 AM | Link to this

Mernin.. I disagree.. I think men have the capacity to love more than one woman at a time.. You love one woman for certain qualities and you love another for other qualities.. Its very Possible..

I’m gonna keep it 1 hunnid this morning.. I loved my girlfriend just as much as I loved my wife.. Actually my girlfriend kept my home life cool. I’m not proud of that because that was one of the things that ultimately ruined my marriage. I had always dated and been in relationships with more than one woman so i thought I could still do it while married. Unfortunately it didnt work out like that especially when girlfriend wanted more time than I could give her.. I said when I got married I would never cheat but a series of events kinda made me seek out the affection I wasnt getting at home and the rest is history.. It was me that could have not gone outside my marriage but the crazy homelife made it easier to get at someone who always had eyes for you.. Although I was WRONG..

Men succumb to marriage not love.

By Rell

February 27, 2008 9:30 AM | Link to this

@page…..i am not going to hijack the blog to explain my post….just know some things are tongue and cheek period…and i dont feel my head with useless knowledge..you have no idea what i read or fill my thoughts with..feel me..and this is the end of back and forth with you today

By Jazzyone

February 27, 2008 9:30 AM | Link to this

Happy belated B’day Darrell One of the main reasons that Africa has a extreme case of AIDS is not because of multiple wives its because of the unprotected sex of people who are infected and the no medical coverage and lack of funding and money and resources as well as lack of education, man I tell ya.

By DasV

February 27, 2008 9:30 AM | Link to this

good morning good ppl

i cannot get with the whole premise that anyone falls in love.

i could not, would not be flattered by a man ‘succumbing’ to or ‘falling in love’ with me. i am a goddess, but i dont wish that…. my preference would be for a man to use his mind and make a conscientious choice/decision to love me, first with his mind and then his body. bring it!

that having been said, a man (or woman) COULD decide to love two or more at the same time, but as darrell said, that would really speak to their poor character to do so.

theTruth mornin! how did you break it off with the lust factor…self-respect intact??

Beautiful when i watched raisin the other night i had the same question…. cause the combs’ character had that problem…. he could not articulate what exactly was his problem. and then i was confused cause he got some money and he was all loving, and attentive and completely different…. cause of some money??!

By Darrell (www.blackthen.com)

February 27, 2008 9:31 AM | Link to this

Beautiful “do you think if would be overkill to go to him and ask him if he wants to talk ABOUT ANYTHING?”

Speaking only for myself, it would be like heaven for me to have a woman actually approach me with that question, because it would convey to me that, at least for that moment, she’s focusing only on me and my needs, which would motivate me to reciprocate in-kind. As I’ve said many times on this blog, it’s all about keeping your mate’s “love tank” full and being proactive in that way is definitely one way to keep mine running over. :-)

As for your “other” question, you’ll have to e-mail me for that info. :-) (darrellbharrison@bellsouth.net)

By Blue_Kolla

February 27, 2008 9:31 AM | Link to this

What up Blog…

Considering how men view/perceive love, is it possible for a man to love two women?

Well let me ask Solomon, the wisest of wise men, and Man of many wives.

Solomon: Absolutely. But honestly, would it be wise in these times? Resist these temptations.

LMAO @ Rell Why do men go to strip clubs..by my SO…i said to look at what we dont have at home…..guess how that went over….yea not good…

By Beautiful

February 27, 2008 9:32 AM | Link to this

Rell i can’t do anything right then. and according to what you posted, why try. i’ll keep that in mind. btw, if he wants to go to the stripper clubs, have fun! i’ll see ya when you get home. :)

By abc

February 27, 2008 9:32 AM | Link to this

Men and women are not different in this regard. To assert that they are is ridiculous. Of course people can be in love with more than one person at a time; look at the entire history of literature, where do you think the idea came from?

By Darrell (www.blackthen.com)

February 27, 2008 9:32 AM | Link to this

DK “Men succumb to marriage not love.”

LOL!!!! Good one. :-)

By AmazonRed

February 27, 2008 9:36 AM | Link to this

Raqi, Page - Don’t hurt em today. LOL.

As for the rest of the commentary, I can see that the ones who have loved 2 at the same time loved on different levels. Does lust = love?

By Bre'

February 27, 2008 9:38 AM | Link to this

Of course anyone can love more than one person at a time. I don’t think its gender based. And the whole fall in love thing I really can’t get with; even as a women. I really feel one makes a choice to love who they want to.

By AmazonRed

February 27, 2008 9:41 AM | Link to this

Beautiful - going back to your 8:47…you said you spoke to “several of them.” Are you saying you sat down and had conversations with the trollops that were going out with your man when he was cheating?

By Rell

February 27, 2008 9:41 AM | Link to this

@beautiful..the funny thing is this..if people would be the best them for there mate…then all these questions or thoughts of someone coming in on the side would not be possible…if you give energy to it then it may happen…but folks are negative..no one gives energy when they get with someone to be the best them…what happens is folks start to think how to lock the person down or make them do what i want them to do….things of that nature…not let me eat right, work out, keep my money right, plan events, communicate..and not just about the day work, bills, etc….feel me…change your focus…

By Jazzyone

February 27, 2008 9:42 AM | Link to this

Loving two people at the same time doesn’t always equate to lies, cheating etc, there are situations and circumstances and all parties are aware that prevent two people being able to come together etc that doesn’t mean you fall out of love with that person, but one can manage to move on and fall for another..its not always so black and white or negative as the blog tone always leans towards..Gee wiz.

By Blue_Kolla

February 27, 2008 9:42 AM | Link to this

Raqi Even after we parted ways he said that he did truly love me. Part of me wanted to believe that, but the logical side of me said that he could not have because he was married to another. He was lying to both of us.

He may not have been in love with you, but trust me, he loved you.

A person’s ego is what stops them from believing that a person can love them and someone else. If you have two children, you love them both; two grandma, you love them both; two brothers, you love them both; same principle. It’s the in love thing that brings on the trickery.

By THE FILTHY VILLIANOUS DK

February 27, 2008 9:45 AM | Link to this

Love comes in phases.. I my book your love stock could be great one day and take a tumble the next.. This gives the other woman a boost on her bell curve.. However there is that time when both the lines intersect at the same point thus making the love for both women the same.. The women never start at the same point but life helps them trade positions.. A second stringer can become the first stringer in a heart beat if the starter isnt perfoming well. Sorry..

By kimmie

February 27, 2008 9:46 AM | Link to this

Slim - Yes, the NJ guy actually kinda gave me the creeps. And his date was very fake, seemed a little like a “beauty pagent contestant”! Seems like he was looking for a little fake blond type though, so they’ll be perfect for each other! I think the reason why he can’t find any dates in the NJ/NYC area is because he wants the fake plastic Barbie type & maybe the local ladies are a little too real for him! The first girl was not as worldly, but probably way more real! I think it was a bad idea to have such exotic food on a first date like that, all that raw seafood! Suppose she had been allergic? And looks like it was room service! Yet you take the other girl on a helicopter ride and dinner - I think she got the shaft! Yeah, the other guy was just an overgrown beach bum! And isn’t it ironic that he told Patty he did not want to be set up anymore, but yet as the credits were coming up it said he is presently dating ANOTHER lady from the dating service?!

By AmazonRed

February 27, 2008 9:46 AM | Link to this

Jazzyone - You are cracking me up this morning. But you’ve made some very good points. Stuff to think about.

By Beautiful

February 27, 2008 9:48 AM | Link to this

FILTHY VILLIANOUS DK my child support payment is late!!! don’t let me have to call … … . wait, your not my ex. your post described him to a tee. my bad. lol.

will you cheat again if you had the opportunity?

By Blue_Kolla

February 27, 2008 9:49 AM | Link to this

Jazzy Loving two people at the same time doesn’t always equate to lies, cheating etc, there are situations and circumstances and all parties are aware that prevent two people being able to come together etc that doesn’t mean you fall out of love with that person, but one can manage to move on and fall for another..

I’m wit’chu on a lotta lines of reasoning, but does this here throw you into the Playa column?

By SexyLeggs

February 27, 2008 9:52 AM | Link to this

Yes, a man can love two women at the same time, but for different reasons. Each woman brings a different side to the man. Whether it’s more sexiness, better romance, a better ear, or even kinder words. Yes, he can love two at the same time.

By QC

February 27, 2008 9:52 AM | Link to this

Page Girl, check out the email i just sent you…

Hey Jazzy, BK (smooches)

What’s up Darrell…

By DreamsMaterialize

February 27, 2008 9:53 AM | Link to this

Morning

People can love more than one person at a time, and it can even be done without lying. The lying is a by-product of the fact that our culture makes it taboo to be with more than one woman. Remove that cultural restriction (such as in other countries) and the need for the lies vanishes.

Beautiful In Raisin In the Sun, Walter Lee’s problems weren’t really the money. It was the fact that he had big, unfulfilled dreams, and (most importantly) those he loved most seemed not to support or understand him. So, getting the money made him feel that his mom trusted and supported his dreams.

By SeanJohnson3000

February 27, 2008 9:53 AM | Link to this

Sup Blog…regarding the topic and reading some of the responses…how can someone put a limit or limitation on who you love and say its possible to only love one? Women act like they dont love more than one person at a time..Rell’s post was the truth..and yall are not always able to handle the truth and how men really think.

By AmazonRed

February 27, 2008 9:53 AM | Link to this

Whoo wee…we got some (former) cheatin dogs on this site! But thanks for your candor and sharing your experience with us today. Hopefully it’s something you won’t do again?

The dating game is a cruel place boy…

By Beautiful

February 27, 2008 9:55 AM | Link to this

ARed yes i did. there were a couple of them who were very nice and helpful. but there were three who i wanted to get my hands on: Cely (the main one), a chick from Sacramento, and the one he married. today, i really appreciate what they all did though. i was so blind back then.

By Jazzyone

February 27, 2008 9:56 AM | Link to this

AMRED loving more than one had nothing to do with lust.. not for me anyway I know the difference…

By The Truth

February 27, 2008 9:56 AM | Link to this

Das self respect is never an issue for a dude, well most of the time. Those are tags women put on it. The other chick went into the air force after I left and went to Ga Southern. BTW, she knew the whole time I was seeing my ex.

Kimmie I saw that one. I was confused becuase skate boy and that chick seemed to be having a great time then it was over. I thought the NJ and the NC girl would be the ones. I think when she told skate boy to spend alot of money on her he lost it. His head dropped and his whole mood changed. Can you imagine a chick saying “your a millionaire spend alot of money for a date”? The matchmaker really is wack and I wouldn’t listen to her azz either. Then again I wouldn’t spend 10,000 for some chick to hook me up with a chick I could meet at Barnes and Nobles either.

Melo one of the reasons africa has the large aids cases it does is because of the prostitution and unprotected sex. These guys go knock off some hooker without a jimmy and then go home to wifey.

Question: Does anyone have an email address where I can send a note to our congressman saying “I dont give a fugg if Roger Clemens used HGH or not, concentrate on your fugging job”? Try Bush for lying to the country you cowards. THank you The truth LOL

Pamela anderson has dropped another one after a few months. How many folks in blogsville have been married more than once and how many times?

By Blue_Kolla

February 27, 2008 9:56 AM | Link to this

DasV …my preference would be for a man to use his mind and make a conscientious choice/decision to love me, first with his mind and then his body.

Sorry babygurl, but real choices like that don’t start getting made until at least 3 months down the line. Up til that point, most dudes are wingin’ it.

By 6'1 & luvinit (aka Don' it All)

February 27, 2008 9:58 AM | Link to this

Hey everybody!!! I couldn’t get online any yesterday. My lights were out at home, Lights were out at the vendor site that I had to visit and my laptop was not charged up. I missed you all. Happy Belate B’day Darrell. I did catch up last night but unfortunately I couldn’t post. Wise, you have been reading my diary.

By Darrell (www.blackthen.com)

February 27, 2008 9:58 AM | Link to this

What’s up, QC (a.k.a. “Waitin’ on 5ive”). :-)

By Raqi

February 27, 2008 10:00 AM | Link to this

Unfortunately it didnt work out like that especially when girlfriend wanted more time than I could give her.. Yep It always happen that way.

BlueK Why did I know someone was going to try to bring up a mother’s love? It ain’t the same. Take it from a mother of two and wife of one. It ain’t the same.

By Beautiful

February 27, 2008 10:02 AM | Link to this

SexyLeggs Whether it’s more sexiness, better romance, a better ear, or even kinder words

from what i gathered, it was the kind words that he seeked. that really hurt my heart, because i don’t rememeber NOT saying kind words and thanking him, etc.

By THE FILTHY VILLIANOUS DK

February 27, 2008 10:04 AM | Link to this

Beauty You know I’m a little older now and more in tuned to what I need from a woman. I dont think I will ever get married again just have a ole life partner that has her spot and I have mine..

By Mo (now known as Moeisha)

February 27, 2008 10:04 AM | Link to this

Morning All!! I see its going ot be interesting today.

Hey Page1908

Rell Why do men go to strip clubs..by my SO…i said to look at what we dont have at home…..guess how that went over….yea not good… In my opinion, you could have said this with a different outcome. As adults you have to know how to talk to people period. Some people can handle info straight with no chaser and others need tact. Some people would call it sugar coating. I mean really, think of how many different ways you could have said that, but it sounds like you wanted to strike up a ruckus. (And since you are who you are that fits! lol) You are a mess. You can still answer truthfully….

Hey GAMan! How are you

on topic, I dont believe you can actually love two people and pursue relationships with both. Like someone stated already, someone will lose out.

By Jazzyone

February 27, 2008 10:04 AM | Link to this

No Blue Nope no player here all parties involved knew we were not in exclusive relationships no games to play not my style but I have loved more than one at one period of time. Had to move forward circumstances prevented us from moving forward as I returned to the states and left him behind but fell in love when I returned with another still loved the other…its quite possible.

By AmazonRed

February 27, 2008 10:06 AM | Link to this

Beautiful - Damn. Your man cheated with all those women? I hope you got your hands on him. Or at least put some ground up glass in his food. LOL

By Darrell (www.blackthen.com)

February 27, 2008 10:09 AM | Link to this

DK “just have a ole life partner that has her spot and I have mine..”

Anyone else get a vision of DK and his “life partner” sitting in rocking chairs across from each other listening to old New Edition CDs while reflecting on the “good ole days”. LOL!

By Blue_Kolla

February 27, 2008 10:09 AM | Link to this

Queen ;)

Truth Google “Write Your Congressman”

Raqi Why did I know someone was going to try to bring up a mother’s love? It ain’t the same. Take it from a mother of two and wife of one. It ain’t the same.

Not being confrontational, but would you please reread my entire post and employ some deductive reasoning? My last line said exactly that. I’m gon’ chalk this one up to left-brain right-brain thought processes.

By Beautiful

February 27, 2008 10:12 AM | Link to this

FILTHY VILLIANOUS DK awww. don’t say that. i truly believe in second chances. and you should give yourself that second chance at being happy and finding a wife/life partner. you and i both have learned something that is so valuable, better than money. do yourself a favor and don’t cheat yourself out of something that can be so beautiful. do you have or want kids? there’s probably nothing better than having a baby with your wifey than an SO.

By The Truth

February 27, 2008 10:13 AM | Link to this

Beautiful its not the kinder words or anything other than people cheat. I never ever cheated to hurt my wife, I cheated to pleasure myself. Don’t try to understand it just accept it. A man is as faithful as his options. You judging a dude on his faithfulness is like him getting mad because you have a cycle once amonth.

A lady friend told me monday that women basically downgrade men afte childbirth because she found what she truelly wanted, unconditional love from a child. Mothers, how do you feel about that?

“Men succumb to marriage not love”

Thats tight.

By Raqi

February 27, 2008 10:14 AM | Link to this

Love happens as a result of time spent, activities shared, feelings expressed with your whole being. Are you all honestly saying that a person can be out their doing this equally with two different people? How does one turn on and off that switch from one person to the other? I love my husband and I am in love with him. I cannot see myself leaving the house and going to be with another man and having the same depth of feelings that I just left at home. Why would I need the two?

I can see where some have sex just for the thrill with another. But love I can’t.

I stated I think last week, that I was sweet on this guy Randy when I got with the man. The more time I spent with the man, the less my interest was for Randy. I didn’t need both of them.

By THE FILTHY VILLIANOUS DK

February 27, 2008 10:15 AM | Link to this

D Lord willin we will be on some cruise ship or foreign beach in those rocking chairs..

By DasV

February 27, 2008 10:16 AM | Link to this

dreams that was me wit the raisin question…. thanks for the insight.

seanJ rell’s post was based on immature, irresponsible choices and i think everyone was shocked that it sounds like he still thinks that way.

its as asinine as a cheating man saying i tripped and my d* fell in her… i dont know who she is. what? it just doesnt happen… couldnt happen.

women can love two ppl at the same time but most of us choose not to… we recognize and acknowledge or feelings but we choose to respect the first choice, whateva came first. men dont seem to value or esteem what or who came first. which speaks to a persons loyalty, which is very serious.

thePasta u kill me with your unscathed livin. all your lessons learned in marriage then eh??

BluK mornin…. re what you said: then we are kickin it for 3 months… till him know what him feel.

By 900K aka Mr 2008

February 27, 2008 10:18 AM | Link to this

Mornin Team - 1st off its kinda strange that we have a discussion goin on ONE mans view of the love world. I am not capable of loving 2 chix at once, nor do I believe that Many men are able to. If you are the exception and in love with 2 women at once then someone is being lied to… YOU, you’re lying to yourself if you think what you feel is love for both of these women. I will not attemp to answer or give an opinion on the issue of women fallin in love with multi men, nor do I believe any woman could give an accurate answer on how & why a man can be In love w/ multi women. The exceptions I think are the men that will actually have two wives & families at once, but there is always a primary target for our affection. I believe in cases like these the Man has fallen in love with the Convenience of the situation more so than all of his wives.

By Rell

February 27, 2008 10:18 AM | Link to this

@MO, ruckus..not even….that was asked after the club and after a session…during “pillow talk” time..its like this….i have a thing for petite slim women…so when i got to the strip club i seek them out…just for the eye candy that is all…now my SO is opposite of that…i dont go to the club to seek out that thick big booty ga peach…i can look at that at home….naw i want to see what i dont get to see on a daily basis..it is called variety…i have to scratch that urge somehow….hey online porn does not cut it all the time…..and really mo, i am not the ruckus type of dude…i just read that way…peace is my motto…because i know how irritional i think when angered…and if i speak it then i act on it…period

By Beautiful

February 27, 2008 10:18 AM | Link to this

ARed yea! where you been? can you see why i had to leave now? it wasn’t pretty. it was so unreal to me. my life, everything was destroyed. and my poor babies. i could have went back a million times, but he would have cheated again. he calls me now saying he will never love anyone more than me. wtf! dude, aren’t you married???

By AmazonRed

February 27, 2008 10:19 AM | Link to this

Man put abortion pills in lover’s food

Goodness, what is the world coming to? Why do folks feel they won’t get caught?

By QC

February 27, 2008 10:21 AM | Link to this

yes i’m waiting & sleepy i’ll be aight…check back in here later

By AmazonRed

February 27, 2008 10:23 AM | Link to this

Beautiful - I definitely see now. I know you left for a cheating man, but I didn’t know how bad it was and how he flaunted it so much in your face. He’s dirt.

So you left, but in June you’re going back there?

By THE FILTHY VILLIANOUS DK

February 27, 2008 10:24 AM | Link to this

Beauty I have a wonderful son with my EX that we co parent so I dont want anymore kids.. Its not a bad thing not bitter about marriage. I just like being at home alone sometimes.. More than I like living with someone.. I love the fact that I can come home and shut the world out at the fortress of solitude.

By chrissy

February 27, 2008 10:25 AM | Link to this

@ melo

In an ealier post you discussed Africa and men having more than one woman. I am from Africa and yes back in the day men openly had more than one wife. today alot of deciet/lies are involved in having more than one woman.

By Blue_Kolla

February 27, 2008 10:26 AM | Link to this

thePasta? LMAO DasV you are f/k stoopid as hayo. hahahaha I’m ‘bout tah choke on these graham crackers.

By AmazonRed

February 27, 2008 10:27 AM | Link to this

Truth, **DK - Was there anything your fiance/wife could have done to make you not cheat at the time? Or was it just a purely selfish decision?

By The Truth

February 27, 2008 10:28 AM | Link to this

Beautiful you know I luv your azz like a peanut butter and jelly sandwich but I cannot figure out this post.

“do yourself a favor and don’t cheat yourself out of something that can be so beautiful. do you have or want kids? there’s probably nothing better than having a baby with your wifey than an SO.”

your projecting your wants and desires on someone else. The vast majority of men don’t go around thinking “I can’t wait to have kids”. They entertain the idea when they meet a woman they feel is suitable, not before. Or when some chick gives them that phone call. For most fellas children is the last thing on the list of things that will bring them joy.

Bk I’m going to do that. As a matter of fact i’m going to send a note to the head of that committee telling him to chill the fug out. So, if I go missing know they got the message and sent the goon squad for me. Y’all put your pennies together and get me a good lawyer. LOL

By THE FILTHY VILLIANOUS DK

February 27, 2008 10:30 AM | Link to this

Raq Thats the difference between men and women.. The laws of the jungle.

By Raqi

February 27, 2008 10:31 AM | Link to this

Each woman brings a different side to the man. Sexy sounds like a case of split personalities.

By Rell

February 27, 2008 10:34 AM | Link to this

@DASV…immature….wow!!!….is that what you think..how is what i said immature….and all this assuming on how i think is crazy..but keep goin….lol..so you have all the answer…ok ladyda…lay it on me..what did i say that was so immature

By Page1908

February 27, 2008 10:35 AM | Link to this

QC YEAH! I saw that email.

ARed Girl, I am gonna leave it alone today, lol.

By THE FILTHY VILLIANOUS DK

February 27, 2008 10:37 AM | Link to this

AR No. Because once a man starts looking at the front door especially after he has seriously tried to make it work.. She’s toast. Something in the relationship dropped her stock.. We are very unforgiving creatures..

Most women think they are the perfect mates when in actually they are more like broomhilda than Cinderella..

By Beautiful

February 27, 2008 10:37 AM | Link to this

ARed yes i’m moving back June 1. my intentions were to stay here, find a SO and be happy. things changed, plus my heart has healed. i’ve been thinking about taking Truth’s advice and give it some more time, but i don’t know right now.

DK i understand.

By Blue_Kolla

February 27, 2008 10:37 AM | Link to this

Truth Had {THIS](http://www.irstaxattorney.com/elecmail.html) in my favs.

By DasV

February 27, 2008 10:39 AM | Link to this

bluKolla did you read how that mayne was puttin it down yesterday??! him dont have to have on his cloak for me to know whats up.

u blog bruhs was helpin me yesterday…. cause you know i got two lil mens at home. had my head in my hands just reading and reflectin yesterday…. wonderin how my two thought processes flowed.

By DreamsMaterialize

February 27, 2008 10:41 AM | Link to this

DasV my bad. Guess I should stop drinkin and bloggin. lol

By SexyCool

February 27, 2008 10:42 AM | Link to this

throwing up the power to the people fist in support of wise…and moving on…enjoy your day…

By Beautiful

February 27, 2008 10:42 AM | Link to this

Truthbaby sometimes y’all need to hear it from a females POV. that’s why your here. we’re always tryin’ to convince one another on this blog to see each others point. well, it was my turn to try it on DK 2day. ;)

By SexyLeggs

February 27, 2008 10:43 AM | Link to this

Raqi, that’s exactly what it is. The “cheating” man has two completely different women in an attempt to create one woman.

By AmazonRed

February 27, 2008 10:43 AM | Link to this

DK - I just want to make sure I understand. You did start looking at the front door, but only AFTER you “seriously tried to make it work.” If she had not done what she did that “dropped her stock”, you would have been satisfied in your marriage. And if you were satisfied, you would have had no reason to stray?

Did I get that right?

By Mo (now known as Moeisha)

February 27, 2008 10:44 AM | Link to this

Rell I know you arent a ish starter I was just messin with you man! Told you I would be cuttin you at the knees!! :0) But what you posted initially and what you said at 10:18 made all the difference in your response from old girl. If you had explained it to her the way you did at 10:18 she may have been receptive to it. You simply saying “I go to see what I dont have at home” is so vague that it sounds like you were putting her down. But in your last post you said you wanted to see something different. Me personally, I dont see anything wrong with that. But that is just me!

By Raqi

February 27, 2008 11:17 AM | Link to this

Since it looks like the blog is broken, I am calling my SO to make a date for lunch. Wouldn’t want him looking for love elsewhere due to a lack of attention from me ya know. LOL

By 6'1 & Luvinit (AKA don' it all)

February 27, 2008 11:18 AM | Link to this

“BLACK” as I fondly refer to him as says that he was in situation, the first go around. He made the point to out to me some of the things that you have said such as it is easier to fall in love with two people when the two women are so different. With the woman that he was with when I met him, she was the exact opposite of me and at that point we were mirrors of each other. So it was easy for him to be with me because it seemed as if we were always on the same page. But just like the typical mistress, I did eventually grow tired of the sharing. So I told him if I make you so happy and she makes you so miserable, leave. Of course to me it seemed easy but it was more easier said than done. Me and her started having confrontations and things of that nature and she would always end the conversation by saying “U just dont know the bullshyt that I put up with, u don’t want him” He had gotten to the point where he didn’t even go home at all, and he would buy new clothes or either he would only go to their home when he knew she was away because he said that he couldn’t bear looking at her. But to make a very long story even shorter, he eventually left her for me and everything was good in the beginning and it was he had multipersonality disorder, because suddenly I seen all the things that he displayed with her, that he never did with me. He couldn’t do it to her anymore and it was like he just had to act that crap out. I eventually called her up and told her to please come get her man.

By 6'1 & Luvinit (AKA don' it all)

February 27, 2008 11:22 AM | Link to this

Sorry for the extremely long post u guys!

By AmazonRed

February 27, 2008 11:26 AM | Link to this

“Men succumb to marriage not love.”

Okay…so we have DK, Truth, and Darrell who all felt this statement. They are also all divorced.

Tell me fellas, did you feel this way BEFORE you got married or just after your marriages failed?

Also, are you saying that no men out willingly wants to get married?

Disclaimer: This post is in no way inflammatory or trying to start a blog fight, just asking a question because I’m intrigued.

By mytwocents

February 27, 2008 11:27 AM | Link to this

Catching up, but Whew! I feel a lil less crazy that someone else thinks this way: could not, would not be flattered by a man ‘succumbing’ to or ‘falling in love’ with me… my preference would be for a man to use his mind and make a conscientious choice/decision to love me, first with his mind and then his body. But u know, Das, lotsa guys think females are kinda cuckoo regardless, so I try not to sweat it.

I share your firm belief, Darrell (9:05) and have come to accept that this is why some love me & others just begrudgingly respect me. It’s also why I’m glad Rell gave her a truthful answer, at least from his p.o.v. Some of us (m/f) still need to learn to stop asking questions we don’t want the answers to!!!

By Cemeeli

February 27, 2008 11:27 AM | Link to this

Good Morning Overcomers!

…yesturday’s dialogue was bomb, I loved it!…I also made an adjustment with my guy last evening about some political things we’ve been dealing with w/him. Brought me and him to tears…healthy theraputic ones. Yea, ppl are right It is not easy trying to raise a boy to a be man.(exp from moms prespective)*! Anyway I took notes from - Dreams, Blue, Darrell, SeanJ3000, 900K, melo, GaMan and Truth and made it clear to dude that the world is not necessarily for him even though mommy is and will always be. We had a pivotal dicussion that left dude sleeping in my room (camping out on my floor) b/c of that heartbeat.

Ladies You all are really some cool chics that are outstanding overcomers also. Whether is was overcoming a crasi ex, family stituations, school or/and careers or lack there of. ^5 and “That a girl” to you all.

I’m very appreciative to those who were/are transparent to us/”me” daily and sheed light and a seed of knowledge to the ones that can use a little ‘pull on the shoulder”.

I’ll get off this box and let you all finish with today’s topic, just wanted to post that.

By Darrell (www.blackthen.com)

February 27, 2008 11:28 AM | Link to this

6’1 “I eventually called her up and told her to please come get her man.”

Sounds like a reverse Erikah Badu moment to me: “I think you betta’ call Tyrone, but you can’t use my phone.” LOL!

By Beautiful

February 27, 2008 11:29 AM | Link to this

6’1 how you get em is how you lose em.

By Tazzee

February 27, 2008 11:37 AM | Link to this

Morning Folks!!!

‘Love’, ‘in love’, ‘fall in love’ - I don’t care how you phrase it just love me and only me!

some points I missed yesterday:

Congrats on the new job melo

Pisces08 I guess I’m going to miss the Frenchy’s blog meet and greet too since I’ll be in the A this weekend, LOL.

By Testing

February 27, 2008 11:37 AM | Link to this

Testing

By Rell

February 27, 2008 11:38 AM | Link to this

@ARED…i can do you one better..before i got married, i felt like there was no benefit for a man in marriage….not one benefit…specially when you dealing with a women that has planned more for the event then the actual marriage…and sometimes i still dont see a benefit but a lifetime of servitude and sacrifice all for some socks and a tie on fathers day..ya wanna know how SOME men think..where is a thought straight from the mind of a married one!

By Darrell (www.blackthen.com)

February 27, 2008 11:40 AM | Link to this

Amazon “Darrell who all felt this statement…”

Correction. My response of “LOL!” was because I thought the guy’s comment was funny, not because I concurred with it. Whether there is merit to what he said is not for me to decide, because every man is different. All I can say is for me, I can’t see myself “succumbing” to marriage because it would imply that I did so against my will and I’ve never had a gun to my head for any reason.

By DreamsMaterialize

February 27, 2008 11:40 AM | Link to this

SexyLeggs Thanks. I know it’s difficult raising a boy to be a man. I saw my mom struggle with it. Just make sure you STAY ON THAT A*. lol I know it’s hard sometimes for women to do that with their boys, but it has to be done. No one else in the world is going to be easy on them, and they have to know how to maneuver in that type of world. If someone is easy on them, then they don’t truly know or care about the disservice they’re doing him. Always be wary of anyone who has a coddling mentality toward your son, especially teachers.

By AmazonRed

February 27, 2008 11:42 AM | Link to this

Why Rell, I do believe this is the first time I can recall you sharing the fact that you are married on here. Though I’m still a relative newbie.

Thanks for sharing. So I guess this means you are feeling the “succumb to marriage” quote too…

By 6'1 & luvinit (aka Don' it All)

February 27, 2008 11:43 AM | Link to this

I know Bootiful, but just like Amy, I went back to Black.

By AmazonRed

February 27, 2008 11:46 AM | Link to this

Darrell - I stand corrected then. Sorry for my misunderstanding!

By Darrell (www.blackthen.com)

February 27, 2008 11:48 AM | Link to this

2Cents “stop asking questions we don’t want the answers to”

That’s some good advice (and I don’t say that to be condescending at all.) What I’m saying is that when a woman says she wants a guy who’ll be truthful and honest her, she herself needs to be fully aware of what she’s asking, because the truth is the truth and not simply what you want to hear your man say to you. For example, you better think twice before asking me “Baby, does this dress make me look fat?” because if it does, I’m gonna tell you “Yeah, baby, it does.” all while gently rubbing the small of your back to make the news go down a little easier. :-)

By Wow

February 27, 2008 11:49 AM | Link to this

men correct me if i am wrong but I have come to the conclusion that men just live by the seat of there pants…..they don’t plan for kids or a wife they just slip up and get one. This explains the divorce rate! This also explains why a lot NOT all end up with w*******. It is sad for me because I am single, 26 and I have no kids. I would hope that my future husband has planned out exactly what he wants from me even though I might not have everything he wants he is at least conscious of what type of person he wants to marry.

By 900K aka Mr 2008

February 27, 2008 11:50 AM | Link to this

Cee -I got you Ma! I do what I can.. when I can do it

I must admit that its funny how every woman says they want loyalty and honesty from a man, but just by reading the blog I see that you are drawn to the very opposite. A guy says (types) that he cheats on his wife, has a long time relationship on the side with another woman and you jump on it. DK, Truth, Darrell & Rell I think you guys need to sit down and write a play, I’ll sell it to theaters accross the US it will be a huge success. Because women are flat out infatuated with gettin their feelings hurt.

By DasV

February 27, 2008 11:52 AM | Link to this

rell fo we start… i will say this ‘immature’ may have been a bit strong. AND i will say that as men you all have the capacity to lead not just two at a time, but legions…. but in this context… reference to the ‘game’ was immature. like love is some stategic, manipulation of another human being. you could not lead two women aware of your feelings for both of them anywhere…. one of them is being lied to, deceive, etc. and i tell mines: a man would not do that, a boy proly would (had that talk we discussed a couple weeks back…. it was powerful)

CEEcee thanks for sharing and good mornin to ya

.02 i know they do…. but i embrace my ‘cuckoo-ness’ and havent we said it before on here: compatiblity is how much of my ‘crazy’ can you take and how much of yours can i deal wit. :)

By The Truth

February 27, 2008 11:53 AM | Link to this

Ared to be totally honest I never wanted to get married. she’ll tell you that herself. I felt obligated because we had dated for 6 years and she was a good woman. As I said, for the most part men don’t go around excited about getting married, and the ones I know that do do so because they’re weak and don’t want be alone. MY .02 Sometimes a cat will meet a woman and she’s so cool you could see yourself spending time with her and when she senses that she puts the full court press on a dude. Ruins the whole thing. If you don’t plan on having a child together or have some business/financial/retirement goal then marriage is useless. Once again, my .02. Look at the stats, dam near 100% of marriages are intitiated by women and dam near as many divorces. Its a fluck story for most, and thats if you get out before you have kids.

6’1 you truly have done the work to earn your name. LOL

BK those Sob’s don’t accept emails from non constituents. I wanted to send Henry Waxman (House Oversight and Govt Reform committee) one telling him to stop wasting our time. They just forward it to your rep.

By DreamsMaterialize

February 27, 2008 11:54 AM | Link to this

Cemeeli

My 11:40 was actually in response to you. Man I gotta put this everclear down. lol

By Darrell (www.blackthen.com)

February 27, 2008 11:55 AM | Link to this

Wow “men correct me if i am wrong but I have come to the conclusion that men just live by the seat of there pants……”

Then consider yourself corrected.

Amazon No harm, no foul. :-)

By Beautiful

February 27, 2008 11:55 AM | Link to this

Wow i hear ya, but good luck with that one. lol. Truth you gonna let her get away with that. lmao.

By AmazonRed

February 27, 2008 11:58 AM | Link to this

900K - who jumped on that fact? I know for me, I love that this is dicussed on a forum where I can ask questions. If I were to ask any guy that dates me, he’s going to downplay it so he doesn’t turn me off or get me scared that I’ll worry about him cheating on me. I don’t have to worry about that type of behavior on here.

These guys are providing a great service today, and I plan to take advantage of it. Still doesn’t mean that what they did is right, or that I condone it, but I can ask questions about what circumstances lead to them cheating.

By SexyLeggs

February 27, 2008 11:58 AM | Link to this

DreamsM, did you mean to direct your post to me?

By DasV

February 27, 2008 12:00 PM | Link to this

WoW ive had that same thought… there is no ‘think-through’ going on…. no strategic thought-process for choices made and details count…. i work for a county school district and it annoys me to no end that there are none of our children in chess classes. i am a single parent and many here were raised by a single-parent, and know that it is truly the toughest job one could ever love….. and i refuse to play chess with my son… have not played one game… though he saw me play all the time with his father…. cause i tell him… till i see you playin chess in your life, you are no competition and i wouldnt enjoy the game wit you. it hurt his feelings but him gonna be 13 next month and he is finally understandin what i meant 3 years ago. it aint just a game, its life centered on a board.

whew….CEECEE that was me on my soapbox

By Jazzyone

February 27, 2008 12:03 PM | Link to this

Some of you guys up in here talking about how women are sensitive and can’t handle the truth, Its funny you know many men have trouble with the truth as well…for instance…

Cat= ‘Baby did you c*\?’

Pussycat = ‘um no baby I didn’t?’

Cat = ‘Why not was it me is it me?’

Pussycat = ‘yes baby you have no d* and don’t know how to use what ya got and ya head game ain’t all that either’

Cat = ‘Well I got some corners bend I’ll holla atcha’ (as he puts on his clothing as fast as flash Gordon)

Pussycat ‘Okay baybeh see ya (as she dials her girlfriend to tell all her bidness about her lack of an ‘O’ with mr big di* wanna be)

Cat = to his friends ‘man her s* was lame and she ain’t good in bed and her head game is lame’

LMAOFF.. I think it works both ways for some, in sex or ending a ‘lationship. When it comes to the truth about things…

By 6'1 & luvinit (aka Don' it All)

February 27, 2008 12:05 PM | Link to this

Truth, I am going to get that on my personalize tag, I keeping putting it off.

By 6'1 & luvinit (aka Don' it All)

February 27, 2008 12:07 PM | Link to this

** Off topic question. Has anyone on here attended Kennesaw State?

By SexyLeggs

February 27, 2008 12:08 PM | Link to this

…I felt obligated = divorce.

Same in my case, I felt I was suppose to be married to my child’s father since we’ve been dating, then living together, than had a child. Man my head was full of cobwebs back then.

By Mo (now known as Moeisha)

February 27, 2008 12:08 PM | Link to this

LMAO @ Jazzyone’s post at 12:03. Good point

By DreamsMaterialize

February 27, 2008 12:09 PM | Link to this

ARed BTW have you been to that new Fatburger on Windy Hill yet? I was there last week. They have some El Pollo Locos here too. All they need now is an In-n-Out.

By AmazonRed

February 27, 2008 12:09 PM | Link to this

cause i tell him… till i see you playin chess in your life, you are no competition and i wouldnt enjoy the game wit you.

DasV - What is the life lesson you are trying to teach by doing this? First of all, you’re hurting your son’s feelings and second the more you’d play with him, the better he’d get so eventually he could beat you. And even if it didn’t give you enjoyment, clearly it would give your son some. Even if you kicked his tail, it would probably make work even harder.

Help me out here…

By DasV

February 27, 2008 12:10 PM | Link to this

nine huuuunnnndred ROTFLOL@ Because women are flat out infatuated with gettin their feelings hurt you know thats not really the case, right?? (no matta what it seem like)

jazz cant nobody handle the truth, huh?? that was fun-ny

By SexyLeggs

February 27, 2008 12:10 PM | Link to this

Just received an email stating 40 million women are in sexless marriages. I was one of them!

By Tazzee

February 27, 2008 12:13 PM | Link to this

900k cheating and having relationships on the side does not equate to loyalty and honesty - telling us about it may equate to honesty but you were correct in that we want loyalty and honesty.

By AmazonRed

February 27, 2008 12:14 PM | Link to this

Truth - Thank you for your 11:53. That’s some insight you can’t get from many men. It makes me feel really good about the guy I dropped last year. We had a good thing going, but he was a mess anytime talk of commitment came up. He may still get married one day, because he is DYING for a son, but it won’t be because he’s had a burning desire to be married.

Maybe I should revisit this single for life thing…lol

By Beautiful

February 27, 2008 12:15 PM | Link to this

Dreams that is the first place i’m hittin’ when i get home.

By Staceye

February 27, 2008 12:17 PM | Link to this

IMO…men can LUST more than one woman at a time…love is not an option! The question is…are men even capable of romantic love? Yes, they can love their moms, sisters, etc…but are they even equipped with the capacity to be in love? Telling me you are in love with me then cheating on me is like PEEING ON MY BACK AND TELLING ME ITS RAIN!!! Not Cool dude…not cool!

Men are such visual creatures that is why they feel the need to frequent strip clubs and long for variety and go as far as cheating! Ladies…I say when in Rome…well you know the rest! Meaning, treat a guy how he treats you. If he wants to look at something he doesn’t have at home…by all means,let him. But you go and do some seeking of your own. If he gets mad at you going to see male strippers and things…tell him they’ve got big sausages and not to get upset…you’re just wanting to see what you don’t have at home! LMAO Oh…be sure to rub his back to make that news go down better while you tell him that!

By SexyLeggs

February 27, 2008 12:17 PM | Link to this

6’1, I have a co-worker who raves on and on about Kennesaw State. She absolutely loves the atmosphere there, the faculty, how they bend over backwards to accommodate the needs of each and every student. She raves about how diverse the curriculum is. Hell, I wouldn’t be surprised if she has a cot somewhere on the grounds because she never wants to leave.

By AmazonRed

February 27, 2008 12:17 PM | Link to this

Dreams - I just found out yesterday it finally opened, so of course I wanted to go today but I committed to lunch with my co-workers and they picked another spot.

PLEASE tell me where the nearest El Pollo Loco is?! Atlanta gets better by the day.

If they had an In-N-Out (and Jamba Juice) I’d be in heaven. I have a feeling that someone has wanted to start a franchise here, but got shut down. In-N-Out is too good to remain soley out west.

By mytwocents

February 27, 2008 12:19 PM | Link to this

So Rell did you marry her out of obligation/felt u owed it to her? Truth I appreciate your honesty on the subject. That’s my worst fear. (Well a close 2nd to the down low bros.) It’s sad too, that I know some gals who bank on this. I consider it a form of settling.

Darrell Of course! When you kiss the boo boo the pain magically goes away lol

Das Maybe the ladies can collab on a book too… called The Crazy Ratio, What’s Yours?

By AmazonRed

February 27, 2008 12:20 PM | Link to this

Jazzyone!!! - Girl. I’ve had several men ask me if I hit the golden “O” and I can never lie. So I say “what do you think?” They start puffing out their chest and that’s the end of the question and answer round? LOL Crazy!

By Beautiful

February 27, 2008 12:20 PM | Link to this

BigD u got mail!

By Wise Diva

February 27, 2008 12:21 PM | Link to this

hey everyone! I am having one of THOSE days, whew! Calgon (or Calvin?) take me away..LOL

I am trying to catch up, but I have a lunch date, so I will be back later

Sexyleggs, a sexless marriage, isn’t that like redundant? LOL 40 million, wonder how those numbers were acquired. Did you guys hear about the minister that asked married couples to have sex every day for 30 days?

By 6'1 & Luvinit (AKA don' it all)

February 27, 2008 12:22 PM | Link to this

Darrell, being in this relationship taught me so many things on so many levels and I don’t regret the bad times as they made me grow. The funny part about the entire situation is that she didn’t stutter at all when she said “Where u want me to meet yall at” I pictured her rolling her eyes and head and I heard her smacking her lips.

By The Truth

February 27, 2008 12:22 PM | Link to this

Wow actually your right. most men plan on conquering the world, not the chick down the street. You appear and if your acceptable based on what that guy wants he’ll write you into the plan. For a dude the course may go like this. School, business, success/comfort plenty of azz, then maybe marriage/kids. For most chicks its school/marriage/kids then lets see what the world brings us. Most chicks get wrote in because they get pregnant. I planned “my life” for what I wanted to do which just happens to be things that women like to do. I never accounted for you emotionally or financially. If you show up I’ll look at it at that time. If you don’t show up my plans aren’t altered one bit.

Jazzy for sure noone wants the truth anymore. We’ve been coddled into believeing the world gives a shyt about us when really they don’t. And thats the beauty of this thing. You can do whatever you want because nobody really cares. If most of us died tonight our families would cry while trying to find a copy of the insurance policy. Your really free to do whatever you want to do. The real question is do you know what you want to do?

By 6'1 & Luvinit (AKA don' it all)

February 27, 2008 12:24 PM | Link to this

There is an El Polo Loco on Thornton Rd. right by the Super-Walmart. My co-workers eat there at 3 times a week.

By Beautiful

February 27, 2008 12:25 PM | Link to this

AmazonRed good one. lmfao.

By SexyLeggs

February 27, 2008 12:29 PM | Link to this

Good one WD. My entire marriage wasn’t sexless, just the last 1.5 years (yep!)

By Jakob

February 27, 2008 12:29 PM | Link to this

are men even capable of romantic love - um er uh, if a woman seriously asks this question, is she nearing the stop for Lesbianville?

By AmazonRed

February 27, 2008 12:29 PM | Link to this

6’1” - Well blow me down. Y’all just made my day.

By melo

February 27, 2008 12:32 PM | Link to this

chrissy what part of africa u from and hw long u been in the states? Thanx Tazzee

By DasV

February 27, 2008 12:33 PM | Link to this

.02 ROTFLOL@ the book title… lovin it!

By Cemeeli

February 27, 2008 12:34 PM | Link to this

All is good DasV.

Thanks Dreams and 900K dude did not realize telling me what was REALLY going on in his mind was gonna press mommas “let’s talk” button. I told dude he has to always hang out with winners and keep a winners mentality. Forget that Christopher is still talking about when you lost to the worst team.

Dreams you are so on point in enlightening me about the teachers and others w/the “coddling” mentality. And in correlation to that, for 2wks there has been a young lady in his school aftercare that has been very ‘friendly’ in the sense. Just realized she’s even carrying his books to the aftercare for him when he leaves. Once i figured it out I stop her in her tracks and told her to STOP IT! Pull her to the side and gave her a talk. I was pssd at him!…his defense was; Mom, I told her to stop doing it. Me looking sideways made it clear to the both of them…

..still on this soap box…let me got eat some lunch…

By 900K aka Mr 2008

February 27, 2008 12:35 PM | Link to this

ARed, DasV -Honestly I cant say for sure but reading thru some of the posts and your responses to them the thought is stuck in my mind. For example the topic itself, I’m sure that there were other P.O.V’s from guys @ the dinner but once homie came out with the evils there might as well been just one. It’s as if women seem to think honesty comes out when men are at their worst. If a guy comes out and says he cheats on his wife every chance he gets and thats just the way its gon be cause he a man, well that MUST be the truth! Also the fact that it consumes you so: WHY he cheats, How can he have a relationship on the side for years, Why does he lie to women… vs. Why is he faithful, What makes him want stay with this woman for the rest of his years, Why he feels as if he can tell her anything.

I understand wantin to know and understand your foe so that you may recognize him when you see him, but how long does that take? Also there needs to be balance. If you walk around spending more time looking for and thinkin of snakes than good dudes then either you’ll end up with one or be by yourself.

Tazzee -thats exactly what I’m saying in the previous post.

By Rell

February 27, 2008 12:35 PM | Link to this

DasV/wow….look at this

but in this context… reference to the ‘game’ was immature. like love is some stategic manipulation of another human being. you could not lead two

then look at this

there is no ‘think-through’ going on…. no strategic thought-process for choices made and details count…

DASV IT IS CHESS NOT CHECKERS HUH…and you have talk to me in my real state….why would you even question or go there with me….smh

By SexyLeggs

February 27, 2008 12:36 PM | Link to this

What I would really like to know is why can’t a married man remain faithful to his wife. I get that it’s all for selfish reasons to bone someone else, but how do you guys throw the respect for your wife behind a closed door only to reopen on your way back home. You think the fact that she doesn’t know helps your conscious? You should feel bad merely because you’re getting your swerve on with another woman. Sheesh!

By Staceye

February 27, 2008 12:37 PM | Link to this

Jakob No Lesbo-ville for me…just dealt with a lot of jackazzes! Which led me to believe the romantic love gene or chromosome was never given to men! But the gene of lust is so ever present in the place where the heart should be! That’s all!

By Page1908

February 27, 2008 12:38 PM | Link to this

WestCoasters LOL @ In-in-Out, El Pollo Locos, and Fatburger! I also need a Jack-in-the Box!

By Jazzyone

February 27, 2008 12:39 PM | Link to this

I mean seriously sometimes ya men make us seem like two headed monsters and can’t handle anything in life and when we can we are settling yatta yatta today im just like enough already you are attracting what youend up with so it says allot about you Dudes..seriusly take some credit for the mishaps and miscommunications that go on between us we don’t hold all this drama on our shoulders alone to be quite frank about it really enough already…

Thats like you all saying well I drove the getaway car to rob the bank a but I didn’t participate..gee wiz…

By Beautiful

February 27, 2008 12:47 PM | Link to this

SexyLeggs i may be wrong, but men feel that if their providing for the family and they get caught cheating, then the wife might stay versus leaving because she has it all. but what they don’t get is that we can’t have it all without you, you big dummy!

By Darrell (www.blackthen.com)

February 27, 2008 12:49 PM | Link to this

Just checked their Web site and In-N-Out Burger is only in 3 states. Ya’ll can forget them coming to the east cost anytime soon.

By Blow Me a.k.a Bomb 1st

February 27, 2008 12:50 PM | Link to this

STACEYE I HAVE TO MEET YOU!! I HAVE TOOO…..OMGOSH CAN YOU IMAGINE US @ A BAR TOGETHER…..WE WOULD BE SOME TRUE FOOLS…..THIS $HIT RIGHT HERE…..IS CRAZY.

If he gets mad at you going to see male strippers and things…tell him they’ve got big sausages and not to get upset…you’re just wanting to see what you don’t have at home!

GIRL I AM CRYINNNNNNNNNNN! You are my sissy…This $hit is classic! You shut the game down with that one!

By Beautiful

February 27, 2008 12:50 PM | Link to this

Page1908 gurl, stop! u makin’ me homesick. jack in the box has bomb a$$ tacos!

By Poppa Grande

February 27, 2008 12:51 PM | Link to this

AR I think that Cincy Bengals Lineman Willie Anderson may be considering an In and Out since his Fatburger at Lindburgh is doing so well. Not sure though. I haven’t spoken to him in a while but the Fatburgh is doing well. He is planning his life after the NFL.

Oddly enough, Jamba Juice is partly owned by Randy Moss now. NFL players trying to set themselves up for life after NFL.

As for as the topic: I think that men are able to love more than one woman. We tend to do this to create OUR (each individual man’s) perfect woman. If the “F’s” are getting met then we will look elsewhere.

AS far as strip clubs go, it depends on what you want. I was friends with the family that own the Gentlemen’s Club and Club Nikki. I seen men in the club that just paid by the song to talk to the dancer. (I always thought that was dumb, but hey it was their money and could throw it in a chimney if they wanted.) Some guys said that they could vent to the dancer without being interrupted and move on about their day. (Those were alot of the daytime regulars that usually got to know some of the dancers.)

BTW, I’ve never seen a big difference between the strip clubs/pornos and those novels that my wife likes to read. Dang, Zane is so graphic that it doesn’t really leave much to the imagination. I read the one about to Sorority. Females have their things to like and males have things to like.

By Ga. Man

February 27, 2008 12:51 PM | Link to this

Ok i had to really think about this, after i read some of the statements here earlier; and here is my thoughts

I am a romantic…i truely believe that there is true love, but you have to love yourself

If you find someone that you can come home to and just enjoy the emptyness of nothing…then you have found it.

we all want to have someone to love and love us back just as hard, the trick is not to make a person feel guilty into loving you but to let it happen as life happens

the moment we stop looking at a list of things and just live life; it will happen in a blink of an eye…not on your time but in TIME

remember this In Love the best things are the words you dont have to say, because you already know it!! and so does he or she

By DasV

February 27, 2008 12:54 PM | Link to this

RELL why would you wit me?? LOL two totally different things sweetheart. love is not strategic… is learned vulnerablity. how i live my life… where i am, what i do, how i motivate to do it, what i want out of life (marriage, family, kids, etc)… that is strategic. keep up. LOL smilin

By Blue_Kolla

February 27, 2008 12:55 PM | Link to this

Truth reg. your 11:53 cosign

DasV .. and i refuse to play chess with my son… have not played one game… though he saw me play all the time with his father…. cause i tell him… till i see you playin chess in your life, you are no competition and i wouldnt enjoy the game wit you. it hurt his feelings but him gonna be 13 next month and he is finally understandin what i meant 3 years ago. it aint just a game, its life centered on a board.

I’m not getting the rationale on this one. Help a brova out.

Leggs Just received an email stating 40 million women are in sexless marriages. I was one of them!

Again, a single dude ain’t having these issues with his g/f.

Staceye Meaning, treat a guy how he treats you. If he wants to look at something he doesn’t have at home…by all means,let him. But you go and do some seeking of your own. If he gets mad at you going to see male strippers and things…tell him they’ve got big sausages and not to get upset…you’re just wanting to see what you don’t have at home! LMAO Oh…be sure to rub his back to make that news go down better while you tell him that!

That’s being cruddy. If you gon’ do some’n, do it ‘cause you want to; but not just to get some get-back. But you might have a point with the tact thing, ‘cause I would ever tell my girl that I’m going out to get what you ain’t got.

Men are such visual creatures that is why they feel the need to frequent strip clubs and long for variety and go as far as cheating!

Know for a fact that lots and lots of broads are hanging in strip clubs too; and on top of that I hear that chick spots allow actual contact. So explain that.

By The Truth

February 27, 2008 12:55 PM | Link to this

Sexy don’t take it personal. It’s not. it’s bigger than you and I. Marraige is a man made facade to enhance and protect riches. Riches have been replaced with love. The thing is love is more fleeting than money, even in this economy. You just said there are 40 million sexless marriages. Thats 40 million cats that went into this thing looking for some azz that would rather beat off than get romantic with a woman he sleeps with every night. And those numbers aren’t included in the divorce rates because they probably have kids and won’t separate, just be miserable.

The bottom line, if you don’t plan on doing something different than ev1 else is doing you might as well stay single.

By IslandGirl

February 27, 2008 1:03 PM | Link to this

Hey Everybody…just stopping in to say hello. I’m still under the weather and don’t feel like blogging today. The topic is interesting and I have to agree with most of the men. I think it is possible to love two people at the same time. Your emotions and type of relationship will differ between the two, but that’s not to say you don’t love both individual. It is selfish, but possible.

Later folks.

By Raqi

February 27, 2008 1:03 PM | Link to this

Sexy I was once presented with a “Abstinence to Better The Relationship” challenge. You can read about it here.

This couple were some wild eccentric weirdos that I think was up to something verrry strange. But to voluntarily do something that a lot of couples are separating for. What sense does that make? But..uh..yeah.

By Jazzyone

February 27, 2008 1:03 PM | Link to this

Truth I deff know what I want to do and doing it..Not perfect but I lead the best life I can with GODs guidance and truth so yep I think Im pretty well versed in MY life.

By Poppa Grande

February 27, 2008 1:05 PM | Link to this

Chess is all about strategy. You are after something while something is after you. Its about attack and protection. Life is about strategy. Going after goals while things in life are roadblock and in some cases trying to stop you all together. How do you strategize to get what you want while only minimizing your exposure to loss.

I used to play chess quite a bit and that is how I saw it.

By Blue_Kolla

February 27, 2008 1:05 PM | Link to this

Dayum Truth! (Reg. that 12:22) You on fye dis week bwoi!

By Raqi

February 27, 2008 1:08 PM | Link to this

Wise when I was single and I would get in one of THOSE blah moods, I would tell my mom “I just can’t shake this thing”. She would say “You need a man. No let me correct that, you need to get married.” Good ole mom. Leave it to her to tell it like it is. Or was back then.

By Raqi

February 27, 2008 1:09 PM | Link to this

Okay Truth you are reading FALSE today.

By Raqi

February 27, 2008 1:17 PM | Link to this

“Thats 40 million cats that went into this thing looking for some azz..”

Uh Truthy are you not aware that that are marriages that exist where it is the man that is not giving it up. He would rather go home and sit on his fat arse and drink a six pack. The wives are having to look elsewhere for love. I work with one.

By DasV

February 27, 2008 1:17 PM | Link to this

bluKolla until i saw my lil man makin moves like what i would expect on a board, i wouldnt sit wit him. cause he wasnt ready.

ive seen some posturing this year that makes me think that he is gettin there…. ie selecting to hang out, fraternize wit this boy ova the next boy, going to teachers to work out lesson plans or humbly askin for needed help, not arguing wit a teacher tho he right so he can walk out wit the grade he wants (but deserves betta cause he made ‘moves’ to get what it already is) …. he is beginning to think beyond the moment, the day, the week … he is thinking at end of the semester i want my grade to be ‘this’ so i gotta make this move 3wks out…. what! much fiya fe dat dere.

ive been watchin him, and i have to admit i am getting curious about his think-through…… i know he is doing it cause there is proof…. which is what i was waiting on. he understands that the proof is who he is …. and his woman is going to be curious about the process too, like his mama….

now you know i respect your words to me on my mines more’n anybody …. so’s tell me yo thoughts…. remember you tole me back in the day to teach em now to wash his own sheets… that served me well, sir :)

nine huuuuunnndred i was laughin at your statement of what could be verifiable truth, except that i a woman and i cant go against the team. i fully understand a cheating man. its nothing complicate grasshopper

By Cemeeli

February 27, 2008 1:18 PM | Link to this

Super Truth where are you mentally for real? 12:22 reads like a person that evokes adequate living on purpose. Good reading you these last couple of days.

By The Truth

February 27, 2008 1:19 PM | Link to this

Ig I hope you feel better. I’m having a care package delivered to your home with some of the dancers from Staceye’s strip club. There will be fruit, soap, tossed salad and sausage. LOL

Raqi why is that?

By Teresa

February 27, 2008 1:22 PM | Link to this

Why do men see spending time with their own children like babysitting

By Raqi

February 27, 2008 1:25 PM | Link to this

Truth look up.

And because marriage benefit men also. Yeah, for those who can’t get with it you can’t and will never see the benefit, but for others they happily welcome it.

Exactly what are the benefits for a woman to get married in your opinion?

By Blue_Kolla

February 27, 2008 1:25 PM | Link to this

Other than running for President, I’ve never heard anyone say that a dude not being married was in any way a negative thing. So why is it that women, who are the main proponents of the institution, do the most changing after the fact? I believe that if wives acted like the g/f they were before papers were signed, more dudes would do a better job at being husbands.

Leggs I don’t know what came first the no sex from you, or the cheating from dude. But come on 1.5 years? Man Thoughts: If we’re gon’ work it out, fine, but that includes me getting inside them thighs. If we ain’t gon’ work it out, aight then. I’m free to call up the next.

By SexyLeggs

February 27, 2008 1:26 PM | Link to this

BK, you’re not saying anything unless you’re living w/your g/f. G/fs don’t have to put up on a daily basis w/the bullshyt married men and women have to put up with. There are many, many, many reasons that lead to a sexless marriage and not all are out of spite.

I gotcha Truth

By SexyLeggs

February 27, 2008 1:27 PM | Link to this

Staceye, received my compliment for the day. Walking to the elevator dude says “Are you sure you’re not in the wrong profession? I think you need to give Tara Banks a call! I had to laugh.

By Beautiful

February 27, 2008 1:27 PM | Link to this

Teresa i’m not touchin’ that one, but now that i get child support i feel like im babysitting.

By Darrell (www.blackthen.com)

February 27, 2008 1:31 PM | Link to this

Teresa asked, “Why do men see spending time with their own children like babysitting”

Ya’ll are killin’ me with all these generalizations today about men. The funny thing, though, is that if I were to try to refute that particular mindset by stating specifics about how much of an effort I make to spend time with my own children, some of ya’ll would respond: “Hell, that’s what you’re supposed to be doing anyway.”, so I couldn’t win for losing. SMH

By The Truth

February 27, 2008 1:32 PM | Link to this

Raqi reread what I wrote. They went into it looking for azz (whick 99.9% of guys are) but now would rather not. Why is that. What has happened to change his/her desire. And as for the benefits of marriage for women, based on the fact that 75% of divorces are filed by women apparently not much.

Teresa your talking about a man that never wanted nor planned for that child. To him its not a bundle of joy but a burden.

similac please clarify your 118 post.

By Ga. Man

February 27, 2008 1:34 PM | Link to this

Teresa For the record i enjoy every minute that i gey with Lil GaMan and i am going to spend the weekend with him this week…i get him about twice a month more if my schedule and his moms works out…i have him all summer long on every break he gets out from school

as a matter of fact i am even moving closer just to be even more invloved in his life

so some of us Dads and fathers really do love our kids and dont feel like they are a burden

By Rell

February 27, 2008 1:37 PM | Link to this

@DASV…aiiight…end of that

@staceye…guess that p** you off too…well how about this

A Stripper’s job is to become every man’s fantasy

BY A SHOW OF HANDS..how many women can say past or present they are currently doing that WHEN TIME PERMITS to there mate or DOES some condition have to meet first BEFORE she feels like getting to that state on providing that every women fantasty to her man

again you guys want to truth but all you do is take it personal and feel like if i flip the same on you then you will stop thinking that way….and you FOOLING YOURSELF….to change a behavior you have to replace with the correct behavior but you have to make it NORMAL..can you compute that…by show of hands ladies

By SexyLeggs

February 27, 2008 1:38 PM | Link to this

BK, when you’re going through a divorce sex is the last damn thing on your mind. When he moves into another room, sex is the last damn thing on your mind. When he’s continuously belitting you sex is the last damn thing on your mind. What’s on your mind is getting him out of the freaking house. I don’t believe in “make-up” sex when I can’t stand the person. Hopefully, I’ve shed a little light on the situation for you. Didn’t care where he got his jollies from. He could have humped a tree for all I care.

By Jazzyone

February 27, 2008 1:42 PM | Link to this

ALL I can say to that Rell is thank God men are not all alike and the same goes for women.

By Raqi

February 27, 2008 1:43 PM | Link to this

BlueK if more guys gave their wives a reason to be the same girlfriend then maybe she will.

By melo

February 27, 2008 1:43 PM | Link to this

Teresa your talking about a man that never wanted nor planned for that child. To him its not a bundle of joy but a burden. ^^^5 ,so if he says baby, lets do an abortion and u back out, dnt accuse him later of insensitivity and not wanting to care for his child.(i knw u females will slam me 4 that)but thats the man way of thnking.Sme wmen clearly have unprotected sex becoz they thnk by having his baby, that will lock the man.In reality, that may only put the child support in lockbox and not hw he feels about u.

By Jazzyone

February 27, 2008 1:46 PM | Link to this

ALL I can say to that Rell is thank God men are not all alike and the same goes for women. Come to reality its a fantasy this is real life you want fantasy continue to go spend your money at the strip club thats what they are there for…when you become a night in shining armour (fantasy) then maybe you will get a stripper (fanatsy) sometimes…seriosly tho….this shyt is give and take seems to me ya want the woman to be a fantasy but you ain’t up on your fantasy game ya selves…

The thing is you can tell us what your truth is as men and we can tell you what our truth is as women its not that we can’t handle it but once you realize its give and take and a partnership and not he movies then all will be well…I know im not taking it personal at all just stating my side of the view thats all..

By 900K aka Mr 2008

February 27, 2008 1:46 PM | Link to this

Did anyone else bugg out when they asked Obama about Farrakan callin him a good man and then brought up a comment made by his pastor in efforst to tie them together???? WTF I’m not sure how he kept his cool on that one… they showed no class at all in the way they did that.

Staceye even tho Im late on this… first off I would only be worried cuz my girl is hangin round naked gay men all nite. I feel on treat him like he treat you but if thats not your nature then it makes no sense at all. Plus everyone knows ya’ll go window shoppin very differently than us, she could go to a football/ basketball game or a female strip club and get the same if not more satisfaction.

DasV -I can respect that, it bugs me out how the bro’s cant stick to a unified front like that.

By SexyLeggs

February 27, 2008 1:48 PM | Link to this

No one should slam you because you spoke the truth. Just like Truth said, they see it as a burden. I never understood why women believed by having a baby they would lock a man down. I know I’m warped in my thinking, but I would have kick my own behind if I thought like that! My Mama taught me better.

By Beautiful

February 27, 2008 1:50 PM | Link to this

melo i think Teresa was referring to married men. so your comment doesn’t apply.

By Cemeeli

February 27, 2008 1:55 PM | Link to this

Super Truth wasn’t going deep or tryin’ to confuse you.

adequatly living on purpose…meaning - back to your 12:22 post. You read as if you are in a place were you’re living/doing things on purpose in life and not a stumble up on.

Darrell She will be a darn fortunate woman. How was your special day? Did you enjoy birthday?

By AmazonRed

February 27, 2008 1:56 PM | Link to this

I understand wantin to know and understand your foe so that you may recognize him when you see him, but how long does that take? Also there needs to be balance. If you walk around spending more time looking for and thinkin of snakes than good dudes then either you’ll end up with one or be by yourself.

900K - Huh? That’s a pretty silly deduction. I’ve never been in a relationship where a guy has been blatently cheating on me. If he was doing his dirt, I didn’t know it. So when an opportunity presents itsself to see what the mindset is all about, I’m going to ask. In my 30 years of living, this is the first candid discussion on cheating with any man.

So what does that have to do with looking for snakes? Clearly I don’t look for them, nor do I attract them. Why does asking questions for one day equal us women being consistantly suspicious of men?

Sorry, I’m just not feeling the broad and sweeping generalizations.

By DreamsMaterialize

February 27, 2008 1:57 PM | Link to this

ARed Yeah the Fatburger is what you would expect from Fatburger, and the El Pollo Loco on Thornton Rd is good too. Jack in the Box would be a good addition. I used to go to one when I lived in Charlotte…think the closest one to here is in SC though. Man, I drove to Lawrenceville to eat at that new Red Robin. lol

By Rell

February 27, 2008 1:57 PM | Link to this

ok….everybody i know the basic rules to this thing here and the last twelve years my time as been split between two relationship…one ended bad..i have told some off blog that story..the current one well it is in yr seven and grows everyday….we add and take away what does not work…i am not the authority on relationships…but i did stay at a holiday inn express!!!

now can we please just respect viewpoint without thinking us(men) are negative or coming down on women…or we have poor choices…thats not true…most of the cats spitting on this blog are real about there lifes and time..they pick quality…but just like my man sam jackson said in jackie brown - just because you pour syrup on sh it dont make it pancakes….feel me..ladies stop thinking you too good to lose your bearing..it happens more than you think….

By Honey

February 27, 2008 1:58 PM | Link to this

Did anyone purchase the new Janet Jackson cd? I need a good review before i get it

By DasV

February 27, 2008 1:59 PM | Link to this

snapping fingers in air for SexyLeggs 138 post…. lemme repeat… sex. is. the. last. damn. thing. on. your. mind. (i dont know how the real dayum got through… maybe cause the filter realize it was all truth!) LOL

By Beautiful

February 27, 2008 2:00 PM | Link to this

GaMan, BigD ya killing me over here. for a man to talk about his kids like that. that is soooooooooo sexy 2 me.

By The Truth

February 27, 2008 2:00 PM | Link to this

Beautiful why not. Just because we’re married doesn’t mean you can come home any time you want and alter the rest of my life. A planned child is one where you and I sit down and discuss that this is something we want to do. I’m on board and you are too. You hitting me with the “good news” may not be good for me. Most women will view this differently because they view this through their desire to have children. We agreed to marry, to buy a home, cars, but you decided that it was time for a family. And then you wonder why the guy resents the hell out of a chick.

By 900K aka Mr 2008

February 27, 2008 2:01 PM | Link to this

Teresa - melo made a good point however this may not apply to you like Beautiful mentioned. So I say if he spends time but complains about it… SO? As long as he’s there and not lettin them play w/ matches, handguns and leaving them unattended then its cool. Historically the Man went out did what he had to do Work for money, work outside to keep the house up… while the Woman tended to the kids inside. Now of course today its Completely different!!! But to have those feelings is kinda normal especially when they’re real young & fragile, I dont like being around kids I cant punch or knock down myself.

By Blue_Kolla

February 27, 2008 2:03 PM | Link to this

DasV Honestly I wasn’t getting that rationale at all, but let me get my air tank, ‘cause I wasn’t thinking nearly that deep. Now you got me back in the lab, with my ish, under the light. now analyzing my reasoning on some things…

You know how me and you get down; it’s that mutual respect thing goin’. Back in the day, been you said to me, “The head shall be held to a higher standard than the tail.” I neva forgot that.

Teresa Why do men see spending time with their own children like babysittingt.

Simple, wrong man.

Leggs when you’re going through a divorce sex is the last damn thing on your mind. When he moves into another room, sex is the last damn thing on your mind.

I’m gon’ let that one ride. I feel you though.

By Darrell (www.blackthen.com)

February 27, 2008 2:04 PM | Link to this

Cemeeli “Darrell She will be a darn fortunate woman. How was your special day? Did you enjoy birthday?”

‘preciate the compliment. ;-) Yeah, I enjoyed it; didn’t do much though, but that’s me. It was cool just to not “have” to do anything, ya know?

By AmazonRed

February 27, 2008 2:07 PM | Link to this

Pappa Grande - I heard Willie had planned to open 8 Fatburgers but now he’s only at 2. I’ll take em tho. I’m not sure if he can get an In-N-Out franchise. They’ve been in business since 1948. You can’t tell me that after all those years someone outside the west didn’t want to open one. I think they want to stay selective.

I heard there was a Jamba Juice in Atlanta once. But it failed.

By Darrell (www.blackthen.com)

February 27, 2008 2:08 PM | Link to this

Beautiful

I appreciate your 2:00. I really do. I’m not gonna toot my own horn as it relates to what kind of father I am to my kids, because I don’t want it to come across the wrong way. Suffice it to say that my love for them surpasses my ability to describe. If you were in my office right now, you could do a 360-degree turn and see pictures of my children at every angle. I have NINE different pictures of them in my office, not counting the TWO I keep in my wallet.

By Jazzyone

February 27, 2008 2:08 PM | Link to this

8Rell* Oh I forgot we are spose to be seen and not heard its all about ya’ll my bad..we are just mimes and spose to take and go with whatever ya dish out and your view is the only important ones cause ya was born kings ..Okay then cool…gotcha…

By abc

February 27, 2008 2:09 PM | Link to this

Ancillary to Truth’s quotation that 75% of women file for divorce (an interesting statistic): in studies, most women cite ‘growing apart’ or ‘unable to meet my needs’ as reasons for filing. It goes along the lines of ‘communication problems’, ‘unhappiness’, ‘incompatibility’ for women, with infidelity and abuse at the bottom of the list.

Women want Prince Charming, Mr. Perfect, an unrealistic expectation; and when their husbands prove to be not only male but human males, the chicks blame their unhappiness on him and bail. Men, by and large, want a wife, sex, home and job, hopefully with a wife that cares for and loves them.

By AmazonRed

February 27, 2008 2:12 PM | Link to this

Page, Dreams - Man Jack in the Crack brings back memories! That was the spot in high school when we could leave off campus for lunch. Only the kids with cars could get there. In college that was the cheap after hours eatery after the club. The drive-thru lane would be down the street. I’d love to see a JITB in Atlanta.

Beautiful - I really love the tacos at Jack in the Box, too.

By the way Dreams I have the number for the Sidney Marcus Fatburger programmed in my phone. Hot and ready when I roll up! LOL

By melo

February 27, 2008 2:13 PM | Link to this

Beautiful, my bad..have not been pying attn.

By Beautiful

February 27, 2008 2:15 PM | Link to this

Truth you got me. so i, your wifey, gets pregnant and now your life is ruined because the baby wasn’t planned. that’s a damn shame! birth control is both of our responsibility, not just the wifes.

By Darrell (www.blackthen.com)

February 27, 2008 2:16 PM | Link to this

abc “Men, by and large, want a wife, sex, home and job, hopefully with a wife that cares for and loves them.”

Well-said and I concur 100 percent!

By Rell

February 27, 2008 2:17 PM | Link to this

@jazzy..you win…and you know that is not what i meant…

By Raqi

February 27, 2008 2:19 PM | Link to this

Sometimes I wish every person who feels that kids are just a horrendous life changing misfortune, had fathers who felt the same way and kept his Johnson in park the day they were conceived.

By Wow

February 27, 2008 2:22 PM | Link to this

Sorry it took me so long really busy!

@Darrell Thanks for nothing…..you only proved my point……men don’t think! And just out of curiosity what did you correct me on?

@DasV and The Truth Thanks for the cosign

@Rell I don’t think that all of the men are low life’s and I do think that the guys on THIS blog have a very good way of expressing yourselves however with that being said I do think that men and women both make poor choices sometimes!

By Jazzyone

February 27, 2008 2:24 PM | Link to this

I know Rell* just giving you a run we haven’t had a good one in a while..LOL…You know I know what you meant baybeh..

By Mo (now known as Moeisha)

February 27, 2008 2:25 PM | Link to this

abc Women want Prince Charming, Mr. Perfect, an unrealistic expectation, Men, by and large, want a wife, sex, home and job, hopefully with a wife that cares for and loves them Now on this one I am more like the men. I have never wanted what you stated above. There is no such thing as Prince Charming, Mr Perfect aint happenin (maybe Mr Perfect For Me). And I actually think more women feel this way than those that want what is listed above. But also men fall into wanting something unrealistic as well. Its not completely onsided on that part.

The opinion expressed above is strictly that of Mo and does not represent the total opinions of the women of Blogsville

By Blow Me a.k.a Bomb 1st

February 27, 2008 2:26 PM | Link to this

Wow…I don’t like fatburger….

I am sick of beef all together though so u can’t ask me.

Chicken is my lifeline..lol.

By DreamsMaterialize

February 27, 2008 2:26 PM | Link to this

ARed Yeah I used to hit Jack in the Box on the late too. Fell asleep in the drive thru a couple times. lol Oh, I gotta say I used to like a Tommy burger from time to time too. I miss hittin up that M&M’s on Centinela too…and the Jerk Pit on Crenshaw near Leimert Park. Cali memories…

By Raqi

February 27, 2008 2:27 PM | Link to this

For every guy who feels the his wife wronged him by getting pregnant needs to put her on the “one aspirin a day” birth control plan.

“One Aspirin A Day” Birth Control Directions: Take one plain aspirin, place it between your knees, and hold it there. Do this everyday for 24 hours and you are sure not to get pregnant.

By SeanJohnson3000

February 27, 2008 2:27 PM | Link to this

@ DasV..regarding you snapping your fingers at leggs post…doesnt matter how mad we get at each other…once you withhold access to the honey pot ..we men take this as not playing with the guidelines of the union…and we go get it elsewhere…dizznick aint got no conscience…only person u are hurting is yourself…thats a weak move.

By DasV

February 27, 2008 2:30 PM | Link to this

bluKOLLA ROTFLOL you tickle me… LOL. in the lab wit yo ish under a light that is fun-NY! seriously, its like what poPPa broke down in his 138 post. my lil mayne learning that….even in a 12yr old he can either lead or be led…. he can either hunt or be the hunted… choices. i think i said it before but its good so imma say it again… i tell him the man he sees himself being, its time for him to show up. show and prove. (we got less than the amount of time he been on the earth to work out the kinks before his on his own)

which is something else i say (why my kids on my mind today??): i am raising you to be self-sufficient. you may want something, but you will not need it once i help you figure out your work-around.

CEEcee (on thePasta) that is a mayne with a plan always in play

HONey not me. but i will say the new MJBlige was extremely disappointing. in fact if anyone wants a gently used (listened to less than 3x) sidebar me and i will send it to you.

By Poppa Grande

February 27, 2008 2:30 PM | Link to this

AR It is tough to get an In-and-Out franchise. It kinda like Krispy Kreme in that they are selective. We take Krispy Kreme for granted here in south. Big Willie is a little worried about the economy. It might not be the best time to expand too fast.

I remember Denatos Pizza came down here for a second. They expand too fast and put the restaraunt too close to each in my opinion. They didn’t last a year. So you have to be careful. More places means more expense.

By 900K aka Mr 2008

February 27, 2008 2:30 PM | Link to this

That’s a pretty silly deduction - is it now? Let me get this straight ARed in your 30 years of living you’ve never had a convo, read a book or even heard of how, when, why men cheat??? Thats pretty hard to believe. Seeing how dam near every top ten selling Black play, or black aurthored book is soley focused on this issue is where I made my so called silly broad sweeping statement. The topic this morn and the statements I’ve read by some put the thought into my head but I’ve always wondered why. All I gotta do is walk to borders in the african-american section or view the upcommin plays to this town and I’m hit with the reality that this not only on women minds but many are buying it.

Who you callin silly?!! big dummie!

By Darrell (www.blackthen.com)

February 27, 2008 2:31 PM | Link to this

WOW What part of YOUR own statement - and I’m quoting you - do you not understand? “men correct me if i am wrong but I have come to the conclusion that men just live by the seat of there pants……”

YOU were the one who opened yourself up to be corrected and that’s what I did. YOUR own words stated a general conclusion that you YOURSELF said you’d drawn about men, so I was simply taking you up on your invitation to be corrected. I shouldn’t even have to explain my response, but the point of it was that NOT all men “live by the seat of their pants” (whatever that means.)

Wow! is right. SMH

By abc

February 27, 2008 2:38 PM | Link to this

Mo, there are plenty of published studies that demonstrate that the vast majority of the time, women file for divorce for reasons of unhappiness that they blame on their husband, and that men’s expectations don’t include their wife being the source of their happiness. Stated differently, women have an idealistic view of what it’ll be like, and when reality intrudes, they blame it on him. He doesn’t even see it coming, because it’s not as if she verbalizes it very much (after all, everyone knows men don’t like to talk about stuff like that, yeah right). She just grows resentful.

Now, you can say that you’re not like that, and other women on the blog can say that they’re not like that, and I doubt anyone here will dispute it; however, I think most of the men here have enough age and experience on them to acknowledge that the statistics represent least a large part of what they’ve experienced personally.

By Wise Diva

February 27, 2008 2:41 PM | Link to this

oh my! I know we are notorious for the sweeping generalizations and broadstroking genders on the MIA blog, but TODAY seems like an all time record! I am reading comments thinking, whaaaaat? SERIOUSLY!? LOL!!

I think I am speechless, and ya’ll know that rarely happens to ME, (sigh)

By pisces08

February 27, 2008 2:41 PM | Link to this

@SexyLeggs. WOW @ your 1:38. So at what point do you start to care about sex again, from the womans p.o.v.? And, where do you go to get it?

By AmazonRed

February 27, 2008 2:41 PM | Link to this

900K - Now you are putting 20 on 10. Who said I never read an article or saw a play about men cheating. I didn’t know that articles and plays could talk back when I ask it a direct question.

Like stated before, if you ask a man you are DATING about cheating, most likely he’s not going to tell you the REAL reason why or get into intricate detail. He’s not gonna want to turn a girl he’s interested in off.

So yes, this is the first candid back and forth discussion I’ve had with a man who has admitted to cheating. There is no vested interest with me, so there really is no need to lie and or downplay the truth. You guys want us to listen to what men have to say, and when we do you accuse us of “looking around for snakes instead of good dudes.” So yes, that’s a silly deduction.

In addition, I called the deduction silly and not you so there really is no need for the name calling just because you got your feathers ruffled. If you’re able handle a discussion without feeling attacked then I welcome your response.

By DasV

February 27, 2008 2:42 PM | Link to this

hole’up seanJ3000 whr did you read that either me or sexyONE was withholdin anything??! i cant speak for her but that was not the case wit me. him ‘owned’ my body as long as the marital vows were intact… but once those cords were cut i was back to owning my own, he owned his….. i am not intimate with anyone who doesnt respect me. simple as that. he killed our intimacy, not me.

a ‘weak’ move wouldve been for me to put myself in the position of contracting some communicable disease cause of his sexual frivolousness.

nah, vulnerability (love) was out the door and i started strategizing (living). rell that was for you! LOL

By Darrell (www.blackthen.com)

February 27, 2008 2:43 PM | Link to this

abc

I Googled “divorce statistics” and found this site. Some of the stats are a bit outdated, but they’re interesting nonetheless.

By Cemeeli

February 27, 2008 2:43 PM | Link to this

DasV yea, living strategically.

tell him the man he sees himself being, its time for him to show up. show and prove. (we got less than the amount of time he been on the earth to work out the kinks before his on his own.)

a new light on it…

By Wow

February 27, 2008 2:44 PM | Link to this

@ Darrell YOU didn’t correct anything! You made a statement saying you were correcting things and didn’t say a WORD after that! I made several comments that you could have had an issue with….NOT ONLY my opening statement…..read EVERYTHING before making a general comment! I don’t have a problem with corrections I have a problem with pointless statements that lack detail. Don’t just scream VETO like a wild beast! lmao

By Cole Wiley

February 27, 2008 2:45 PM | Link to this

I submit that a man’s “true colors” don’t manifest themselves over night. They are there, hiding, all along. However, your power of discernment becomes clouded by a noxious layer of lust/love/infatuation. Admittedly, there are some issues that, even after decades of marriage, Superwoman would not be able to detect, but in most women’s cases there are multiple red flags lining the road to perdition. You didn’t think he’d change, did you? Too many women marry men expecting them to change and they don’t; too many men marry women expecting them not to change and they do. (Take a second to let that digest.) Or maybe you ignored them because you were too enamored with the thought of finally being with someone that you neglected to consider whether you were with the right one.

Decide this day—this very second—how you will allow men to treat you. The choice is simple. The choice is yours. What will it be? Goddess or Doormat?

By Wow

February 27, 2008 2:49 PM | Link to this

@DasV….I cosign That Mary J is not too hot!

By SeanJohnson3000

February 27, 2008 2:53 PM | Link to this

@ DasV…my bad…i was going on leggz post..

By Darrell (www.blackthen.com)

February 27, 2008 2:54 PM | Link to this

Wow “You made a statement saying you were correcting things and didn’t say a WORD”

Um, yeah, that was on purpose. You see, by not saying anything in additon, I implied a certain conclusion relative to that rather broad and general comment you made. The problem is, though, you failed to draw the inference from that. But, it’s all water under the bridge.

By DasV

February 27, 2008 2:55 PM | Link to this

CEEcee gurl, that rabbit hole goes deep: you gonna love and be true to your wife? - then love on your momma and dont do mess behind my back, trynna get away wit it

you gonna pay the bills at your house? -then do your job now, make all a’s (or at the least your very best) now

you gonna be a good father and teach your children? -then give some thought to how you tell your lil brother to get out yo room, or leave you alone

you gonna have a nice yard and phat crib? - then get out here and help me rake these leaves and remember on your own to put the trash out on tues and fri.

and there are times he falls short/makes mistakes, but i tell him…. betta you fall short now and see what you need to do then to be a grown-azz mayne tyrnna figure shyt out.

By Blue_Kolla

February 27, 2008 2:55 PM | Link to this

This blog is full of colorful azz lingo. Veto? I’m gon’ have to use that one. LOL

By Page1908

February 27, 2008 2:56 PM | Link to this

ARed and Dreams Girl, those Jack in the Crack Tacos were powdered meat, remember, lol!!! That’s why they were so cheap, lol.

I used to be a Social Worker for Child Protective Services in San Diego and one of the foster moms was some kind of Big Wig at Jack in the Crack, so I had to meet with her at her office at the headquarters in San Diego. Their offices are off the chain!! Also, their lunch room is a full service Jack in the Box and she was like “you wanna get something to eat?” I was like “sure”, lol.

I also used to LOVE Thirfty’s ice cream, lol.

By Staceye

February 27, 2008 2:56 PM | Link to this

Blow Me I just got back from lunch! Glad that I made you laugh girl! I am picturing us at a bar…probably getting kicked out fr starting shyt! LOL I know we are related…maybe in a past life or something! LMAO Me and you us neva part, maki da da!

Blue guys can dish it but can take it huh? LOL

Sexyleggs Work that thing out..in the words of Mary J. Blige! LOL

Rell maybe because I got multiple personalites or just never gre out of playing dress up..I got a closet full of costumes, shoes and wigs of all colors. I actually enjoy pretending to be somebody else…and of course I LOVE to perform, if I have a man. I do that for him from time to time! I even make him address me in a different name, depending on the costume and wig!

900 not all male strippers are gay!!! LOL

Jazzyone LMAO @ your 2:08 post!

Raqi Sometimes I wish every person who feels that kids are just a horrendous life changing misfortune, had fathers who felt the same way and kept his Johnson in park the day they were conceived well then we just would not be born…can’t miss nothing you never had! LOL I always say…I didn’t ask to be here! But I am..so oh well…

One Aspirin A Day” Birth Control Directions: Take one plain aspirin, place it between your knees, and hold it there. Do this everyday for 24 hours and you are sure not to get pregnant that is funny because when I was 12 my now deceased Grandpa did the trick to my by saying, “I bet you can’t hold this quarter between your knees…walk with it and everything.” So of course…you challenge me..I will take you up on it. Then he said as long as I kept that quarter between your knees you won’t get pregnant! LOL

**

By 6'1 & luvinit (aka Don' it All)

February 27, 2008 2:57 PM | Link to this

I am a very sensitive and affectionate person. Those are innate qualities that men really don’t display or offer as much I would like them to. I look for that in a mate. I dont want no wuss, you know there is a way to do everything. Me being this way and wanting these things in my SO made me in fact turn to a woman to get what I was lacking from a man. The reason why I continue to go back to “Black” is because it is the best of both worlds. He is sensitive and affectionate and he masculine at the same time. He is not perfect by a long shot but right now he is perfect for me. That enables me to be in a monogamous relationship because otherwise I would be with a male and female at the same time.

By Rell

February 27, 2008 2:58 PM | Link to this

@abc……COTDAYUM PLAYER…I AM STANDING UP ON THAT POST…SO TRUE….THAT IS THE TRUTH RIGHT THERE

By mytwocents

February 27, 2008 3:01 PM | Link to this

Poppa & 900 LOLOL You gotta admit it is kinda comical. Some sistahs really do have a Tyler Perry book in one hand, Zane’s latest in the other and always claim they’re ‘standing on The Word.’ But really they’re following the path that whatever Chitlin Circuit play just blew thru the Civic Center has led them onto. I guess having a big brother who to this day harrasses me w/ male viewpoints makes it easier to see thru different eyes most of the time.

By SexyLeggs

February 27, 2008 3:01 PM | Link to this

pisces08, I’ve always cared about it and still do. I don’t go anywhere to get it just yet. During that last 1.5 years I was emotionally shut down and was trying to find “ME.” I lost myself somewhere along the years (so my friends have told me). So, not having sex wasn’t a problem for me. Now, that I’m back to my true, crazy self, and have adjusted to this divorce and my child is in a great place, I’m slowly venturing back on to the dating scene. Sex and making love are two distinct components to a relationship. I’m not looking for sex right now. Mary and her five fingers relieves the pressure for now (LOL). I realize I have to step back out there in order to have sex or even make love. I feel like a new pony who can’t find it’s legs just yet. That’s why I’m on here listening to you guys to get a feel on what is really out there!

By AmazonRed

February 27, 2008 3:02 PM | Link to this

Aw…Page1908, no you didn’t bring up Thrifty’s ice cream. My dad would take me and my sisters there for some quality time. Now we’re all grown and all of us are obsessed with ice cream. Cold as it is outside, I even had ice cream today cuz I ate at Jason’s Deli. LOL

By Page1908

February 27, 2008 3:05 PM | Link to this

LOL @ Darrell researching any and everything on the blog all day long. ctfu

now googling Darrell lol

By Blue_Kolla

February 27, 2008 3:05 PM | Link to this

Darrell I feel ya pain.

By QC

February 27, 2008 3:10 PM | Link to this

Darrell love da kids :-)

Page did you get my emails, i hope you were able to see the pics this time…especially that New Hot Ghetto Mess OMG>>>LMAO!

By SexyLeggs

February 27, 2008 3:13 PM | Link to this

ARed, which Jason’s did you go to????

By melo

February 27, 2008 3:13 PM | Link to this

Some sistahs really do have a Tyler Perry book in one hand, Zane’s latest in the other and always claim they’re ‘standing on The Word.’ in case smebody missed it..lol

By Cemeeli

February 27, 2008 3:14 PM | Link to this

DasV they’re just sly of being the best that they can be right now! If we keep pressing they’ll be some tight men. Whew…that dang gleaning.

Wasn’t it snowing this morning. Now i’m sweating…wth?

By Wow

February 27, 2008 3:14 PM | Link to this

@Darrell That’s the problem when your going to correct someone you make very direct statements don’t imply anything because that leaves too much room for error! How ever I do agree with you statement about this being water under the bridge….so I will give you a pass on this one but next time watch your conduct and take some of that base out of your voice! Lol lol lol

@Blue_Kolla You can use it feel free!

By Men's Health Magazine

February 27, 2008 3:16 PM | Link to this

Judging from the kind of mail we get at Men’s Health from men seeking relationship advice, I can tell you this definitively about men: When a man falls for a woman, he falls hard. Men love to be in love. While men often get stereotyped as single-minded sex-seekers, the truth is that a man’s stomach churns like a slushy machine when he’s in those initial stages of the perfect relationship.

By AmazonRed

February 27, 2008 3:16 PM | Link to this

SexyLeggs - The one in Cumberland Mall.

By Darrell (www.blackthen.com)

February 27, 2008 3:20 PM | Link to this

BlueK Thanks, man.

Page LOL! I feel like Bill Clinton during his infamous statement during his impeachment trial: “It depends on what the definition of the word ‘is’ is.” I gotta link every darn thing to make sure people (Wow) understand what the heck I’m sayin’ (i.e. implied vs. inferred)

By Beautiful

February 27, 2008 3:21 PM | Link to this

every saturday we went to thrifty’s for ice cream in the summer. omg. what memories. one scoop was, i believe, .15.

By 900K aka Mr 2008

February 27, 2008 3:21 PM | Link to this

ARed!!! - baygirl you are a riot! before I get back to reg convo. Was it not you 1-2 weeks ago was all about takin it light, and makin wisecracks on folks but asked them not to take them too seriously? We’re both over 30 so words like Dummie and Silly dont mean shyt. put your earrings back on

Back to it: Who said I never read an article or saw a play about men cheating -Not I… I ASKed if you ever read a book or had a convo (w/ anyone) No? then I stated it was hard to belive; that does not mean your a liar! I never mentioned ARed and a play be easy on the speed read. If you walk around spending more time looking for and thinkin of snakes IF -key word here. All I’m saying is focus more on the positives in life, not sure how you could disagree but hey do you. I dont know if you’re self centered or insecure but I was never talkin about you or your type in the 1st place, YOU just assumed that I must have been talkin about you.

By Page1908

February 27, 2008 3:21 PM | Link to this

LOL ARed Girl, the Thrifty’s that used to be by World on Wheels in LA on Pico was the bomb. That was back when Zody’s was still around…lol

Girl, you know I love ice cream, too, so when I moved to Phoenix for 3 years, I turned into a Cold Stone junkie, plus their headquarters was located there, too…lol YEAH Cold Stone rocks! lol

By Darrell (www.blackthen.com)

February 27, 2008 3:22 PM | Link to this

Wow “and take some of that base out of your voice”

It’s b-a-s-s, Einstein. :-/

By Beautiful

February 27, 2008 3:23 PM | Link to this

Magazine u got your blog vest on? lol.

By SexyLeggs

February 27, 2008 3:26 PM | Link to this

Oh ok, if you said the one by me (not that you know where that is) I was going to call you and scream!

Melo, had to put Zane to rest for a bit. It got to be a bit much even for me.

By Wise Diva

February 27, 2008 3:28 PM | Link to this

aw man, I wish I could argue that point mytwocents (Tyler Perry/Zane) but I have witnessed some people use that stuff as their gospel sigh, it’s very weird

Darrell, how was your special day? Did you at least get to rub on some booty or something? LOL! Don’t answer that

By Demi

February 27, 2008 3:28 PM | Link to this

When a man falls for a woman, he falls hard.

Yep, Glad I learned not to allow my emotions to control my thought process…A woman will burn yo a$$ if she is not feeling you the same way

By Sidelines....

February 27, 2008 3:31 PM | Link to this

Darrell…It’s b-a-s-s, Einstein. :-/…lmao, classic!!!

BTW, Happy B’lated B’Day my fellow piscean!!!

By The Truth

February 27, 2008 3:33 PM | Link to this

Raqi if I could get pregnant I wouldn’t rely on anyone to prevent that but me. Thats a part of your responsibilty. On one hand you ask a man to have a plan for you and him, take care of the home and make sure all is well, provide you with love and comfort and that warm fuzzy feeling and then you can’t even make sure you don’t get pregnant. Does he need to insert a plunger to block that too. Come on, what are YOU rsponsible for? Tell me. You don’t want to cook everyday. Cool. I’ll help. You need help cleaning the house. Done. Car washed. Got that too. Grass. Check. Garbage. Out with crack of daylight. A plan for retirement? Let me get back to you after this recession. LMAO My point is what are you responsible for? You can’t even make sure you don’t get pregnant, which btw, alters every other plan we’ve made. Then you wonder why a cat won’t take a chick in his circle and trust her.

Let me say this again. A chick that comes home with that “great news” has cheated far worse than a chick who gives away some azz. chicks talk about honor and honesty and then pop some shyt on him that wasn’t discussed and hope he’s cool with it. You didn’t get pregnant with that unemployed cat that was pulling your wig so why now? Talk about sleeping with the enemy.

By Wow

February 27, 2008 3:33 PM | Link to this

@Darrell….wow you caught that….lol…your not a dummy!

By Darrell (www.blackthen.com)

February 27, 2008 3:33 PM | Link to this

Wise* “Darrell,…Did you at least get to rub on some booty or something?”

Matta’fact…

LOL!

By Page1908

February 27, 2008 3:34 PM | Link to this

LOL Beautiful @ .15 cent for one scoop of Thrifty’s ice cream! busting up laughing. Dang, I think even Truth may remember that one..lol

Now I want a Pink’s Chili Dog lol

By Mo (now known as Moeisha)

February 27, 2008 3:34 PM | Link to this

abc there are plenty of published studies that demonstrate that the vast majority of the time, women file for divorce for reasons of unhappiness that they blame on their husband, and that men’s expectations don’t include their wife being the source of their happiness. Wouldnt it be fair to say though that this is dependent on what is happiness to most women and men? If a woman’s happiness is her man being faithful and he’s not, then her filing for divorce makes sense to me and vice versa. The studies I’m sure define what those conditions are so to make a blanket statement is harsh. True most men dont file for divorce but to simply state that its b/c he doesnt look at his wife as his whole source of happiness is vague. From the divorce men that I know, most dont file for what they stand to lose (money, material). JMHO. I understand what you are saying and everything, but it I need more study info.

Magazine you trying to start a riot in here arent you? Even I dont believe that mess!

By Staceye

February 27, 2008 3:36 PM | Link to this

Hey don’t knock Zane..I got pretty much all her books! LOL

By 900K aka Mr 2008

February 27, 2008 3:37 PM | Link to this

a man’s stomach churns like a slushy machine when he’s in those initial stages of the perfect relationship - The fact that I almost crashed my whip on the 75 after I thought I had left shorty crib thinkin that I would never see her again makes this very true!!! I had no idea what the h3ll was wrong with me.

By Cemeeli

February 27, 2008 3:37 PM | Link to this

Page come on sis…Cozy Cone is not to far from the crib… I sure don’t need it …dang fitness challenge….

Cold Stone is my ultimate. I’m always game for a cool creation.

By melo

February 27, 2008 3:38 PM | Link to this

I’ve always cared about it and still do i like the candor sexxy

By Blue_Kolla

February 27, 2008 3:39 PM | Link to this

Darrell It’s b-a-s-s, Einstein. :-/

Go’ead Wordsmith LMAO Mayne that convo is wild. Slim knows exactly what you meant, but jumped out there too fast and dayum near got run over. But instead of getting back on the curb to have a good look-see, that pride made her press on. Now she’s on the other side with a broken heel.

By Demi

February 27, 2008 3:40 PM | Link to this

As a couple, Zane just make you you want to try some shyt, LOL

By QC

February 27, 2008 3:41 PM | Link to this

We have a Zane Book Club here at work we need help, we’re hooked

By Darrell (www.blackthen.com)

February 27, 2008 3:42 PM | Link to this

Sidelines Thanks for the belated birthday greetings. When was/is yours?

By Beautiful

February 27, 2008 3:42 PM | Link to this

SexyLeggs i have a small collection also. my fav is Afterburn.

By Demi

February 27, 2008 3:43 PM | Link to this

Sidelines…. How r you doing?

By DasV

February 27, 2008 3:43 PM | Link to this

CEECee you know i have always loved that ‘gleaning’ analogy. smilin

melo do you ever check your email?? LOL

By Cemeeli

February 27, 2008 3:44 PM | Link to this

lol @ Mo’s resonse to Magazine followed by 900K response to Magazine right after. ROTFLOL! hahahaha

“Yesturday I cried”…today I laugh.

By Raqi

February 27, 2008 3:44 PM | Link to this

Truthy I am responsible for not allowing a chump who will fault me for getting knocked up ejack his soldiers into my uterus.

By Sidelines...

February 27, 2008 3:48 PM | Link to this

Darrell…Your welcome, it was Saturday! Hopefully, you enjoyed your day, I most certainly did!!!!

Wait’a min.., was that you trynah’ rub my booty…lol!!!

By The Truth

February 27, 2008 3:48 PM | Link to this

Mo is it true you have a booster seat at your office so you can reach the keyboard? Its just something I heard. Smooches

Magazine I’ve been in love before but never had the churns, except that time I ate some bad mexican. YUUUCCCKKKKK

By melo

February 27, 2008 3:52 PM | Link to this

DasV takpat78@gmail, i aint getting none email..who u talking to that u think is me babes….

By Raqi

February 27, 2008 3:52 PM | Link to this

You know Truth I have taken two pregnancy test since I have been married. My birth control is only 99% effective. There is always that 1% chance. Both times when I told Mason he never became upset. You know why? Because as a grown man he realizes every time he enters raw, which he has done for the past five years, he leaves a little possibility behind.

I am doing my part. Other than abstinence there is no more that I can do? That 1% is on him.

By Wise Diva

February 27, 2008 3:53 PM | Link to this

OMG, Raqi, your 3:44 comment just took me down, Diva DOWN! LOL LOL!!

maaan, you guys are too much for me today, whew! My head hurts now!

By melo

February 27, 2008 3:54 PM | Link to this

Das and make sure u get all the lost mail coz i dnt want my juicy stuff to get lost..lol

By Darrell (www.blackthen.com)

February 27, 2008 3:54 PM | Link to this

Sidelines “Wait’a min.., was that you trynah’ rub my booty…lol!!!”

Matta’fact….

LOL!

By Beautiful

February 27, 2008 3:54 PM | Link to this

Truth your 3:33 is unbelievable. i don’t know how to respond to that. what’s the topic for 2day again?

By SexyLeggs

February 27, 2008 3:54 PM | Link to this

I can’t remember which Zane book it was, but when she started getting her groove on w/that umbrella handle I could barely contain myself. I read the entire book that night (LOL).

By Blue_Kolla

February 27, 2008 3:54 PM | Link to this

Truth chicks talk about honor and honesty and then pop some shyt on him that wasn’t discussed and hope he’s cool with it. You didn’t get pregnant with that unemployed cat that was pulling your wig so why now?

Trying to hurt some feelings there ain’t’cha champ? Dayum.

Ladies I don’t think Magazine is gon’ get a whole lot of resistance on that one.

Staceye Hey don’t knock Zane..I got pretty much all her books!

Now that explains a lot, and I’ve never even read one.

By AmazonRed

February 27, 2008 3:55 PM | Link to this

900K - Wrong again. I didn’t say you were talking about ME. Remember I said you were making BROAD statements? That’s what I was talking about.

Because again…how does asking questions on the topic of CHEATING mean that someone is not focused on the positives of life? The topic is cheating! You still have yet to answer this question.

By Demi

February 27, 2008 3:55 PM | Link to this

Mo why do you think most men become so heartless, only 15% of the men are born heartless from the jump…The rest are made.

By Wise Diva

February 27, 2008 3:57 PM | Link to this

OMG, Raqi, your 3:44 comment just took me down, Diva DOWN! LOL LOL!!

maaan, you guys are too much for me today, whew! My head hurts now!

By The Truth

February 27, 2008 3:58 PM | Link to this

Raqi so a grown man lets you get pregnant anytime you like but a boy doesn’t. Is that your logic? If you and Mason have decided thats what you want thats fine. If it wasn’t discussed beforehand then its cheating, like I said.

Darrell this is the stat that caught my eye.

Fatherless homes account for 63% of youth suicides, 90% of homeless/runaway children, 85% of children with behavior problems, 71% of high school dropouts, 85% of youths in prison, well over 50% of teen mothers.

By melo

February 27, 2008 3:58 PM | Link to this

*sexxy u got fedex delivery!!

By Page1908

February 27, 2008 3:59 PM | Link to this

Staceye LOL girl, me too. I love Sex Chronicles I and II and Alpha Phi Fluck’em…lol

QC LOL @ Fulton County Gov’t Zane Book Club! Ya’ll need to do some work down there! ctfu

Cee lol @ Cozy Cone!

Truth LOL @ you getting the BG’s (bubble guts)..lmao now gagging

By 900K aka Mr 2008

February 27, 2008 4:00 PM | Link to this

my.02 - very true, even tho I get blasted for it they know what the h3ll I’m saying.

Cee, Mo its very true for SOME of us. This is why I do not believe in the calculated love BS. Cause trust me this chic was not wife material or worth my love but my heart & stomach felt different. I was trying to leave her azz and there I was… SICK and about to hit the guard rail.

Mo -you’re not a man, so please dont tell us what you think WE think. I haven’t seen a guy in here today try and tell women what Women think and feel about love. If one tries then he better be quotin his Mamma

By AmazonRed

February 27, 2008 4:00 PM | Link to this

Boo…I hate Zane! She sucks! All her stories sound the same. I wish I could take back the few hours I wasted reading that drivel.

As for Tyler Perry, I’d never seen any of his movies until I moved to the A. I have yet to see his plays. But I do like the few movies of his that I’ve seen.

I wondered what type of person went to those “Mama I done burnt the chicken” plays, but some of them lately do seem interesting.

By Cemeeli

February 27, 2008 4:00 PM | Link to this

John Legend’s CD - Live in Philedelphia is pretty cool.

Mo before you respond to Truth remember Cold Stone is a happy place. :0)

By Raqi

February 27, 2008 4:04 PM | Link to this

Wise He acts like women are siphoning semen while men are asleep and impregnanting themselves.

I mean come on dude. You are 100% at “Fault” as the woman.

By DasV

February 27, 2008 4:05 PM | Link to this

LOLROTF@ BK commenting on the correlation betw Eye and Zane.

melo laughin atchu and yo ‘juicy stuff’… LOL you’ve got mail

By SexyLeggs

February 27, 2008 4:05 PM | Link to this

It’s WD’s turn (LOL)!

By QC

February 27, 2008 4:06 PM | Link to this

Page Oh no girl we don’t discuss/read them here…we get together once a month and do that

By Darrell (www.blackthen.com)

February 27, 2008 4:07 PM | Link to this

Truth That same stat stopped me in my tracks, man. Amazing.

By Beautiful

February 27, 2008 4:07 PM | Link to this

Fatherless homes account for 63% of youth suicides, 90% of homeless/runaway children, 85% of children with behavior problems, 71% of high school dropouts, 85% of youths in prison, well over 50% of teen mothers.

excuses, excuses, excuses. these are people not taking responsibility for their OWN actions. just because daddy is not in the house, doesn’t mean you go off and do dumb shyt!

By Sidelines....

February 27, 2008 4:08 PM | Link to this

*Darrell, lol… too much!

Everyone have a good evening…

By Blue_Kolla

February 27, 2008 4:08 PM | Link to this

Cee lol @ Mo’s resonse to Magazine followed by 900K response to Magazine right after.

See? Check the responses. Many women don’t even want to believe that a dude can be like that. But the real is, that when a dude feels that he’s got that ride-or-die ridin’ shotgun, he’s “ALL IN”.

Get this though, you ain’t gettin’ that distinction without proving yourself. There’s gon’ be some tests that you won’t even know about but you better know that he’s taking notes.

Lastly, I’ve seen many dudes on here post the recipe on how to be a ride-or-die. All yoll gotta do is take notes. We are.

By Demi

February 27, 2008 4:10 PM | Link to this

Darrell this is the stat that caught my eye.

Fatherless homes account for 63% of youth suicides, 90% of homeless/runaway children, 85% of children with behavior problems, 71% of high school dropouts, 85% of youths in prison, well over 50% of teen mothers.

Men still shoulder 95% of the blame…Demi is in no mood to forgive these lame a$$ dude…That MOST women seems to enjoy dating.

By Wise Diva

February 27, 2008 4:11 PM | Link to this

Sexyleggs, you see that right? I jinxed myself helping Lady J, LOL. I am using Firefox now, so it shouldn’t happen this time (fingers crossed). IE is janky!

By QC

February 27, 2008 4:12 PM | Link to this

I’m out bloggers…HOLLA

By Raqi

February 27, 2008 4:14 PM | Link to this

No, a grown (meaning intellectually mature) man realizes that every time he takes that ride uncovered there is a possibility. Our plan is to not have a baby, but if it happens we both are aware how.

You want to eliminate all possibilities then don’t do the deed or cover yourself. Period. You can’t have the best of both worlds all the time.

The End.

By Demi

February 27, 2008 4:15 PM | Link to this

Page Oh no girl we don’t discuss/read them here…we get together once a month and do that

QC with toys’n’clothes lined up as well huh?

Even I can’t read a page without having a woman on deck.

By Tazzee

February 27, 2008 4:16 PM | Link to this

LOL - Wise Diva got the Lady J disease!

By Cemeeli

February 27, 2008 4:17 PM | Link to this

DasV you have 2 and i have one you keep the boat afloat much better than i can think…i commend girlie.

Tyler Perry - I admire his testimony, but i am not a fan of his work. I don’t know why my family think that i’m should be just b/c i’m an ATL native…don’t get it…

By mytwocents

February 27, 2008 4:18 PM | Link to this

Y’all who don’t like latest Mary - are you waiting for her to be angry again? hahahahaa I like her new leaf! Can’t wait to see her & Jay 2Xs.

Cee I was @ that show! It was good, but he took forever to hit the stage. Did they include bonus tracks of Robin Thicke? He opened, it was hot! Hmmm Must now ponder groupie tendencies.

By SeanJohnson3000

February 27, 2008 4:18 PM | Link to this

@ Leggs…from the look of it..maybe..just maybe the handle of an umbrella will hit the G…spot of a female…but why use something artificial…then again..it can be a slick way of seeing of the cooch is so fresh and so clean..get me one of those 30 dollar umbrellas BK endorsed…get my Rhianna remix on

By Demi

February 27, 2008 4:20 PM | Link to this

Blue_Kolla in truth, even if a woman sees your character, sees your actions lining up with your word, and sees you being there for her time and time again…she will never believe your feelings for her are true.

Now slap the shyt outta her a$$ and see how she loves you!!

By Staceye

February 27, 2008 4:21 PM | Link to this

Raqi I am doing my part. Other than abstinence there is no more that I can do? That 1% is on him girl I like the way you put that. It is so true! You can only do but so much. If you abstained from the deed to be 100% safe..then you are wrong for withholding sex form the SO….UGH men!

Blue Now that explains a lot what you trying to say bruh? LOL

Page The Chronicles are the bomb…but I have not read Alpha Phi Fluck’em…I may have to trouble you to borrow that one girl.

By Blue_Kolla

February 27, 2008 4:22 PM | Link to this

Beautiful excuses, excuses, excuses. these are people not taking responsibility for their OWN actions. just because daddy is not in the house, doesn’t mean you go off and do dumb shyt!

See? You standing on the finish line looking at the end result. You need to zoom back to the starting line. Let me say this real loud like - THE BEGINNING IS HALF OF THE WHOLE. And that goes for anything in life. If your start is flawed, in this case fatherless, meaning you only are equipped with half of the required parentage, there’s a good chance that your ending will be flawed too. Those are legitimate probabilities.

Example: If you begin your adult life with say a college degree and some home ed on finances, then your chance of being successful at 40 will be a helluva lot greater than someone that began their adult life workin’ fries at Mickey D’s with no HSD. E’rybody ain’t gon be able to overcome the odds.

Why do you think you always hear, “Are you grading on the curve?” when it’s time for finals. Right, ‘cause they started the semester slackin’ or not doing ish at all.

By The Truth

February 27, 2008 4:24 PM | Link to this

Raqi thats a crock of shyt and you know it. These women have stated time and again how they want a man with a plan but its ok if she comes in and makes major alterations to it. In the end the cat with plans gets the same result as a cat with no plans. Mature responsible adults discuss major decisions between them. You stil haven’t told me what you’re responsible for.

By DasV

February 27, 2008 4:25 PM | Link to this

CEE i am witchu! i dont get down like errrybody else when it comes to tyler perry…. never read through a zane book… first couple pages lemme know where it was at. now, j.calfornia cooper?? could read that all day-n-day.

Cee, you’s a native peach??!

By Men's Health Magazine

February 27, 2008 4:26 PM | Link to this

For a man, though, love at first sight quickly becomes more like “love at first-through-twelfth sight” - that is, not only the initial physical and chemical reaction that happens when he sees a woman, but also the behavior and personality nuances that come out early on in a relationship. They’re the ones that determine whether the chemical reaction escalates into true love or explodes into a love-lab disaster.

By SexyLeggs

February 27, 2008 4:26 PM | Link to this

You’re absolutely right Raqi, it takes 2 to make a baby. Any man that depends on a woman to take sole responsibility for using birth control 9 x out of 10 finds himself with a baby. How many stories are out there where the dude believed the girl was on the pill. Why, because she said so? That answer shouldn’t fly, and because lust has taken over, futher conversation along these lines are left untapped.

By Demi

February 27, 2008 4:27 PM | Link to this

Blue_Kolla in truth, even if a woman sees your character, sees your actions lining up with your word, and sees you being there for her time and time again…she will never believe your feelings for her are true.

Now slap the shyt outta her a$$ and see how she loves you!!

By DreamsMaterialize

February 27, 2008 4:27 PM | Link to this

Beautiful these are people not taking responsibility for their OWN actions. The stats are referring to the actions of CHILDREN. I think it’s a bit harsh to criticize a homeless or suicidal child as doing “dumb s**”. Instead the criticism should be of the parents, who are really responsible for the actions of the child, which is the point of the statistics. If there were a father around to teach children to be responsible for their actions, then many problems could be solved.

By Page1908

February 27, 2008 4:27 PM | Link to this

Staceye Email me, and you can def borrow that one, but you better give it back, and make sure the pages are not stuck together, lol. That one is off the chain! You can read it in one night, lol. I have Belly Dancing on Sunday, so let me know.

By Raqi

February 27, 2008 4:28 PM | Link to this

Man I dare Mason to ever come at me with some s** like that. It will be cold day in hell before he ever wets his rooster in me again.

Good night yall.

By Cemeeli

February 27, 2008 4:29 PM | Link to this

Blue there are a select few i take notes from and those are the same i have read post/say they are ready to have a “real” realtionship and/or they love their wife or current lady. So i don’t short change a guys feelings by any means. Trust i’ve been very observant.

By 900K aka Mr 2008

February 27, 2008 4:30 PM | Link to this

ARed - you are complicating this young’n. The topic is can a man love 2 at the same time, not cheating (although it goes hand in hand). Waaay back when this morn I say NO. Now I will not knock my bro’s for going against the grain on this one. But they know for the most part that its BS and completely weak to give another woman your heart when it already belongs to another. ladies and love are very different so I dont touch on that.

Boo…I hate Zane! She sucks! All her stories sound the same. I wish I could take back the few hours I wasted reading that drivel - AND here we are! This is exactly what I meant and I dont see why you are going back and forth w/ me. its those dam book readers Im referring to that are looking for snakes, reading about snakes and going to plays about snakes!

BlueK - But the real is, that when a dude feels that he’s got that ride-or-die ridin’ shotgun, he’s “ALL IN” That adds to my earlier point SOME women just seem drawn to the worst men have to offer and dont believe when we give them the positive.

By Beautiful

February 27, 2008 4:32 PM | Link to this

BK sorry, i believe what i posted. i know plenty of successful people who did not have a father in the home. excuses, that’s all it is. so if a guy is in prison for killing someone, why put him in jail if his father left his mom when he was young?

By Mo (now known as Moeisha)

February 27, 2008 4:33 PM | Link to this

900k Mo -you’re not a man, so please dont tell us what you think WE think. Umm. when did I do that? I remember saying something about a lot of men that I talk to, but I dont remember saying anything with the words “men think…”

Truth Booster seat and a step stool, so what? :0)

BK Its not that I dont think it can happen (men with squishy feeling, etc) but I havent seen many men really admit to feeling like that. So do I believe it, no. I know men can fall in love and all that though. So I believe that…

By Blue_Kolla

February 27, 2008 4:34 PM | Link to this

Staceye what you trying to say bruh?

I was giving you a pass on some of the things, read ish, you say. LOL You’ve been bamboozled, hoodwinked, schammed, played, lied to, misguided, etc… by these literary vices that you choose to indulge in. Pick up a Charlie Brown book. You might actually learn something.

Demi in truth, even if a woman sees your character, sees your actions lining up with your word, and sees you being there for her time and time again…she will never believe your feelings for her are true.

That’s because society, read friends, tv, TP/Zane, TouchDown Jakes, etc say otherwise. The loudest voice should be the one right next too you, but how many times have you had to get IN your girl’s ear, before she finally turned around and said, “Ha?”

By Raqi

February 27, 2008 4:34 PM | Link to this

No Truth you are full of shyt. There is nothing my eggs can do sitting dormant in uterus. It takes your (a man) semen to activate them, therefore making a baby. Plan or no freaking plan I can’t do it by myself.

Now good night again.

By SexyLeggs

February 27, 2008 4:36 PM | Link to this

SJ3000, I was so taken aback when I read her with the umbrella. My warped minded tried to visualize it and got myself all heated. Using an umbrellas was a different concept to me. No, I’ve never tried it!!

By The Truth

February 27, 2008 4:40 PM | Link to this

sexy I’m not talking about some trick chick your knocking off. E1 knows to protect themselves from that. you and I know that 99.9 % of those pregnancies dont fall into that 1% accident rate. They’re a chick deciding she wants a kid and “accidently” missing a pill. Thats what happened. The thing is everyone is responsible for everything but you are just a victim again. That bad man made me have this baby. Ok, your pregnant. Abort the child, give it up for adoption. Otherwise your throwing that child into the old stat pool because chances are you’ve just sealed the end of that relationship and pappa’s walking out the door. Don’t believe me tho, look at the stats. Or better yet talk to some of these bloggers who have had mates walk out the door with those unplanned surprises.

By Cemeeli

February 27, 2008 4:41 PM | Link to this

mytwocents…Hmmm Must now ponder groupie tendencies.

Lol…me too! My girlfriend just laugh when i come around with the CD ready. I keep at least one of Legend’s CD on strap when i’m at anyone of my friends houses….One gf has a phat media/sound system and i don’t even get Hello out good before i’m headed to the CD player to blast “So High”. I had the kids singing Heaven only Knows joint during dinner at her house once. LOL! Robin Thicke songs was not on the House of Blues CD.

DasV yea i’m a conrnbread eatin’ Ga. Peach. J.California Cooper- looking that up…need a new read. Never read a Zane before but one lady at the book club wants to start - thanks for the heads up.

By Anon for today

February 27, 2008 4:41 PM | Link to this

I believe the men are not fabricating and react to what they believe is right in their minds when they feel the marriage/relationship is drowning or lacking but I don’t agree that the right thing to do. But it happens none the less. Here’s my last conversation in what almost happened.

Person 1: You know I love you.

Person 2: I do.

Person 1: A different time and place.

Person 2: I know.

The end. Nothing more nothing less to be said.

Without gorging intimate details that was the nipping in the bud of what could have happened for all the reasons aforementioned. Mental connection present from first interaction, physical connection a given but not all all about sex. There was a lot of time spent listening and talking and that shoulder to lean on. Nothing I planned nor intentional. The end result though was a connection almost impossible to break.

By 900K aka Mr 2008

February 27, 2008 4:44 PM | Link to this

Mo wrote: Magazine you trying to start a riot in here arent you? Even I dont believe that mess! How would you know what goes on when a man is hit with the love bug and what he feels like inside? Thats all I was gettin at… no biggie

By Blue_Kolla

February 27, 2008 4:45 PM | Link to this

Mo Unlike for women, talk don’t mean ish to men! Men do and prove. We only talk to appease you women, but we’d much rather show you. He might not tell you all’at lovey ish yoll want to hear, but if he’s out on the ground in the rain, trying to figure out what that strange knock on your ride is, take heed. I’m gon let it ride after this right here ===> Ladies, stop trying to apply pressure to a dude. Sit back and let him DO. Keep ya mouth shut(not literally) and observe.

Let she with an ear, hear.

By AmazonRed

February 27, 2008 4:45 PM | Link to this

900K - You’re so lost. That comment you made about snakes was in response to the questions DasV and I were asking about cheating. I know what the topic of the day is… and we moved past that long ago. Since you’re having a “senior moment” or something, this convo is done. All I wanted was an answer to the question that I asked you 3 times for. All you had to say was that you weren’t going to answer. Sheesh. LOL

By Staceye

February 27, 2008 4:45 PM | Link to this

**Page…I promise no sticky pages! LOL You at L5R studio on Sunday or Perimeter?

Sexyleggs Using an umbrellas was a different concept to me girl who you telling? LOL

By Demi

February 27, 2008 4:51 PM | Link to this

but how many times have you had to get IN your girl’s ear, before she finally turned around and said, “Ha?”

Blu A few years later, but I’ve moved on by that time.

Mo LOL, I’ve learned to kept my feelings to myself, and let her believes whatever she wants to believe.

If she thinks I am a dog..for her I will be a dog.

LOL, don’t mind me.

By SexyLeggs

February 27, 2008 4:53 PM | Link to this

I understand where you’re coming from Truth, you were just so harsh. Oh well! harsh and honesty is not synonymous!

You will be delighted with the writing style of J. California Cooper!

By Cemeeli

February 27, 2008 4:54 PM | Link to this

Blue If we do this Ladies, stop trying to apply pressure to a dude. Sit back and let him DO. dude asks -What’s wrong with you acting all distant? I know men don’t do mushy.

By Mo (now known as Moeisha)

February 27, 2008 4:56 PM | Link to this

900k okay I gotcha, but remember I said I dont believe. I never mentioned knowing anything about what a man thinks or feels. And I wont know til he tells me. My belief doesnt mean it cant happen, know what I mean. Its all good boo.

BK Ladies, stop trying to apply pressure to a dude. Sit back and let him DO. Keep ya mouth shut(not literally) and observe. I wish I could say that works but in my last relationship me & SO were opposite. I was the one that didnt say much and he wanted to hear it. I felt like he should have sat back and let me DO. But b/c I wasnt spillin my guts he was unhappy, go figure! LOL

By Demi

February 27, 2008 4:59 PM | Link to this

I know men don’t do mushy

Only if you’re just a cut buddy, LOL

By SexyLeggs

February 27, 2008 4:59 PM | Link to this

Good night everyone.

Put on Ohio Player’s Sweet Sticky Thing, and ladies assume the position on the cover. Ok, men. go to work! Oh yeah!

Please, get some rest and stay ALERT!

By 900K aka Mr 2008

February 27, 2008 5:02 PM | Link to this

ARed - Sorry I dont spoon feed grown ups… either read the data and process the info or walk around dazed & confused.

Let she with an ear, hear wow the fact that this is right above your post is no coincidence.

Good Eve

By Demi

February 27, 2008 5:03 PM | Link to this

I know men don’t do mushy

Only if you’re just a cut buddy, LOL

By AmazonRed

February 27, 2008 5:05 PM | Link to this

900K - Didn’t ask to be spoon fed. It was part of the discussion, once again, you’re off in orbit somewhere. Really not that serious, dude.

Good evening to you too.

By Wise Diva

February 27, 2008 5:06 PM | Link to this

Have a wonderful evening everyone!