Misadventures in Atlanta

By Cemeeli

January 8, 2008 9:41 AM | Link to this

…can not start the year off like this (technical difficulties)! Breakfast is always better…

French Toast, Eggs w/cheese, Bacon, Muffins, buttery grits and fresh cut strawberries, bluberries and peaches
with yougurt. To drink variety of juices and WATER (no crystal lite).

Enjoy!

By Dan

January 8, 2008 9:41 AM | Link to this

WHAT?

It’s up? I’d bout called it a day….

By Beautiful

January 8, 2008 9:45 AM | Link to this

Bella you are so on point with Women, how many times have you ended up dating someone you didn’t give a second glance to when you met him? it aint funny. that’s why we (women) shouldn’t pass up the not so attractive ones.

By Rell

January 8, 2008 9:49 AM | Link to this

Men, tell it to us straight: Do you, generally speaking, know if you’re in it for the long haul early on in the relationship?

Hell no i dont know, i usually know after the first head job

Does anything really change for you after three months of dating a woman, or do you think you (at least subconsciously) have things figured out by then?

The only change that comes is that i finally get to meet the real women. By month 3 i have done something to shatter that fairy tale she had in her head..So i will see how she resolves conflict. Also by then i would have a chance to check out her living habits..so i will see if she hangs her yesterday bras on the door to wear in the morning…ya know stuff like that….also by month 3 i will see if she uses sex as a weapon to get her way.

BTW Melo, i caught your lil slick arse comment homie…lol

By Blow ME Beautifully a.k.a BLOW ME

January 8, 2008 9:49 AM | Link to this

Good Morning…..wow FINALLY!

I personally have not fell in love with someone….I did not initially like. (Well not yet anyways) I guess that’s the relationship area..I’m not familiar with yet. Not to say I would not be open to the idea. But there would have to be SOME kind of attraction there just to get it jump started.

But more importantly I am willing and ready to fall in love with what’s ultimately GOOD for me. I’m done taking shorts.

By 2CPTG©

January 8, 2008 9:52 AM | Link to this

ya know, when yo have isshas, first thing in the morning, kinda makes the topic irrelevant (j/k)….with that said…..

By Mo (now known as Moeisha)

January 8, 2008 9:52 AM | Link to this

Thanks Cemeeli!! I was about to write today off as one of those days. Thanks for the breakfast chica!

I’ll comment on topic layer

Morning Errbody!!

By Cemeeli

January 8, 2008 9:53 AM | Link to this

Morning Dan…

Where is everyone? …breakfast is getting cold :).

Auw…love: I digress. Don’t have much to say about except i’m ready to fall.

By AmazonRed

January 8, 2008 10:01 AM | Link to this

There is a chain email that’s gone around called “Men and Marriage: It’s not that complicated.” Long story short, it’s basically a man commenting that it doesnt’ take 5 years or even 2 before a guy knows if he’s gonna commit long-term. If he’s playing the “not ready” card, he’s stalling for time to see if something better comes along. I tend to agree with this.

As for me, my high school sweetheart was a guy I never gave a second glance to until he confessed his attraction to me one day at the movies. I definitely fell for him the more I got to know him. The key is getting to know the person.

By Lady J

January 8, 2008 10:02 AM | Link to this

Hello All! Enjoy your day!

By A friend

January 8, 2008 10:04 AM | Link to this

FRIENDS: Never ask for food. SOUTHERN FRIENDS: Always bring the food. GHETTO FRIENDS: Will eat all your food and talk about how nasty it taste

FRIENDS: Will say “hello”. SOUTHERN FRIENDS: Will give you a big hug and a Kiss GHETTO FRIENDS: Don’t hug for fear that their pockets might get lifted, they just dap each other up

FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr. and Mrs. SOUTHERN FRIENDS: Call your parents Mom and Dad GHETTO FRIENDS: Call your parents by their first names but only at night and on weekends because of their free evening and weekends cell phone plan

FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry. SOUTHERN FRIENDS: Cry with you. GHETTO FRIENDS: Made you cry then laughed at you and told you to “stop acting like a lil b*$%h”

FRIENDS: Will eat at your dinner table and leave. SOUTHERN FRIENDS: Will spend hours there, talking, laughing, and just being together. GHETTO FRIENDS: Will show up late, eat, and take a plate in some aluminum foil for lunch the next day

FRIENDS: Know a few things about you. SOUTHERN FRIENDS: Could write a book with direct quotes from you. GHETTO FRIENDS: Will actually tell all your neighbors and friends your direct quote; plus add some extra comments they think you should have said

FRIENDS: Will not leave you behind if that’s what the crowd is doing. SOUTHERN FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds’ a* that left you. GHETTO FRIENDS: Will leave with the crowd, and then instigate the fight by telling the crowd that “So-and-so wanna fight you because ya’ll had left her”

FRIENDS: Would knock on your door. SOUTHERN FRIENDS: Walk right in and say, “I’m home!” GHETTO FRIENDS: Will show up with their bags and some story about why they got kicked out of their place and need to stay in your home

FRIENDS: Are for a while. SOUTHERN FRIENDS: Are for life. GHETTO FRIENDS: Are for as long as you have money, a place where they can stay, or you let them borrow your car; otherwise, they don’t need you

FRIENDS: Might ignore this. SOUTHERN FRIENDS: Will forward this GHETTO FRIEND: Won’t ever get this because their internet connection got cut off with their phone or cable.

By Cemeeli

January 8, 2008 10:08 AM | Link to this

That was real Melo! I was rolling @ Rell and Mysterious sitting in a tree …hahaha.

DasV that was 900 tearing out pages in the catalog not me…Lol! Did you forward dude the message?

900K Have you orders my things yet. That’d be sz small. Lol.

By binford

January 8, 2008 10:11 AM | Link to this

I am an analytical kind of guy and I use a tiered evaluation system (think Dante’s circles of hell :P )

For example…

I know off the bat if she is someone I am attracted to and could be for a while. Then after talking with her, I get a general sense if we are on the same page. Then we start dating and hanging out. Next we are intimate …so on and so forth.

You never know what lies at each level and it like a train on tracks you hope can hold. But one major attack of the crazies in the early stages derails the train.

By SexyLeggs

January 8, 2008 10:11 AM | Link to this

Good morning!

Do you agree that (quality) men become even more attractive over time? Yes! I’ve dated someone along time ago that was much bigger than what I would normally be interested in. However, he treated me with respect and made me feel loved daily. My opinions counted to him. He made me laugh. The moral fabric of a person is what makes them beautiful in my eyes. We lost contact! In my next relationship thanks to him and my ex I know what I’m looking for and what I won’t settle for.

Off-topic turned channels last night and stopped at the LSU game. Told my child that everybody in America is watching this game, and she asked why we weren’t. Had to tell I don’t know enough about football to sit with a 13 year old and watch. We both laughed.

Back to regularly scheduled programming.

By 2CPTG©

January 8, 2008 10:12 AM | Link to this

Random thoughts from 2 Can today;

If Barack is elected president, do you think he’ll throw a bar-b-que at the whitehouse?

By The Truth

January 8, 2008 10:12 AM | Link to this

Good morning folks. Who wants me to make brakfast tomorrow? LOL

On topic: Men, for the most part rule a woman out over time, unless she does something stupid that gets her immediate foot to azz. Its not genereally an all or nothing deal like with women.

By Beautiful

January 8, 2008 10:13 AM | Link to this

it’s basically a man commenting that it doesnt’ take 5 years or even 2 before a guy knows if he’s gonna commit long-term.

ladies, it only takes a guy 2 months to know. please trust me on this. or not. ;) hope every1 is having a great morning.

By DASv

January 8, 2008 10:13 AM | Link to this

laughin with tears in my eyes at a friends posting…. according to that im a friend some of the time, a southern friend most of the time, and ghetto in only one aspect of time

By Dan

January 8, 2008 10:14 AM | Link to this

It’s interesting,

A while back a female friend of mine spoke of her “Girlfriends” inspired “3 month rule” (those that know, know).

So I ask her what would change in 3 months? Her reply: “If he waits the 3 months, I know he’s not just in it for sex.” Wow, I thought, 3 months of hald-holding, public displays of affection (with no private corresponding display), and 3 months of abstinance….

What I told her informs my reply to this topic. That is, “that even after 3 months (an arbitrary figure I’ll grant you), what some men intended to do will be done. That is if he was looking just for the puddy, the time spent will be nothing more than that for him, time. He’ll get what he came for, yet you (the aforementioned friend) will be 3 months into feeling something for this man, that he had no intention of returning.”

By 3 months, 3 weeks even he knows what he wants from you. On rare occassions will that opinion change.

Notably upset she tried to debunk my argument, to which I only replied this:(and after a post of this length I’ll leave it here for now and get back to work) “when two people meet, the snapshot is for a moment in time. It does not represent the totality of that person’s life before , during, or after that meeting. You may be in a comfortable place with him and looking for a relationship, he may not and vice versa. So to think that the time spent working toward (what could be) two divergent agendas, is somehow not relevant is just a plain misconception of reality.”

By Lady J

January 8, 2008 10:22 AM | Link to this

so true Dan…

By Cemeeli

January 8, 2008 10:24 AM | Link to this

2C Heck YES and i’ll bring a side. Lol!

Sexyleggs sis we gotta get you and lil Leggs on game!

DasV did you get ghetto fab on text dude???

By Blow ME Beautifully a.k.a BLOW ME

January 8, 2008 10:26 AM | Link to this

Dan Can agree with a few pts. But most guys who just want the puddy..will not stick around for 3 mths and continously be part of her life just for the PUDDY….Then to what’s the point? Just because you wait 3 mths does not guarantee anything…What if the sex is bad after 3 mths? Then what? You bouncing!! Do you though! I hate when I hear women say and tell guys this. It’s so inmature and dumb. If that’s how you feel keep those cards and thoughts to yourself..Don’t tell him that’s gonna be your game plan. No don’t give it up on the first night…especially if you want something to go down. But having a “set” amount of time is plan ridiculous. Each situation is on a case by case basis….Just me ranting! CARRY ON!

By SexyLeggs

January 8, 2008 10:27 AM | Link to this

Dan, you are right on this *That is if he was looking just for the puddy, the time spent will be nothing more than that for him, time. He’ll get what he came for, yet you (the aforementioned friend) will be 3 months into feeling something for this man, that he had no intention of returning.”

By DASv

January 8, 2008 10:28 AM | Link to this

good morning good ppl

CEEcee my bad i thought that was you… LOL

nope. i didnt forward the message… i want to say it to him in person, but he didnt call back last night… home with the wife i guess. sexyLeggs thinks we still need to hammer some things into the reply i think, and Ared said it was waaay too much. i just want something consistent that i will adopt as my standard reply for triflin men who on some simpin….. whew… lemme take a breathe

on topic

is this a reincarnation of ‘love at first sight’??… thought we all agreed that it can only be ‘lust’ at first sight not love… im suspectin ppl holdin back cause the argument over what love is has mind-numbing effects.

mature ppl recognize and grow to care for each other on the level that warrants saying ‘i love you’…however because of the anorexic english lang… i can say i love black cake and i love you and your perception of love defines what i mean, not what i mean and my definition.

having said that… i think this topic is more so addressing compatibility … whether or not you feel the person is worth an investment of time and energies. i have heard it said on this blog before: compatibility is how much of your crazy can i put up with…. aint that the truth

(i feel comfortable with my long post cause aint no one up in this camp saying much)

By Cemeeli

January 8, 2008 10:28 AM | Link to this

Hey LadyJ and MO!

By Blow ME Beautifully a.k.a BLOW ME

January 8, 2008 10:29 AM | Link to this

The Truth You dont’ know a person will enough to know if she is wifey after a few months…Judging her character over time will determine if she is that..It does takes time to see someone’s marriage potential….Beyond the obvious, looks & material thing and work ethics. That’s a good start but it’s so much more than just that.

By abc

January 8, 2008 10:32 AM | Link to this

It seems to me that the whole thing is wrapped up in people’s reluctance to believe, and believe in, each other. Everyone has experienced those that purposely misrepresent themselves; those that aren’t mature enough to know themselves and thus can’t make such decisions and commitments; those that aren’t emotionally, mentally, and developmentally stable enough to be a viable candidate; those that focus on the material and strictly tangible, regarding most else with a cold heart. All of those things are true for men and women alike. Is reluctance to believe warranted on that account? Maybe so, maybe so.

Self-imposed rules of time limits, looking for telltale signs, or consulting with psychics won’t dispel the suspicion, and it only gets worse as you get older: trust repeatedly violated erodes the remaining available trust. Some people call it ‘baggage’.

By Rell

January 8, 2008 10:33 AM | Link to this

@beautiful..riddle me this:..if it only takes 2months, then why so many single wonderful women available..i mean if you are all that why are guys not beating down the door to marry a women.?…..huh batman. Listen it takes time to know if you can even add to this INDEPENDENT womans life…i mean she may even try to pee standing up to show you that she is your equal!!!!!

By abc

January 8, 2008 10:37 AM | Link to this

…and I’ll tell ya, a guy that sticks around for 3 months just to get laid is a sucker. There isn’t anything so special about a particular piece of azz that warrants such obsession, and there are plenty of women down for the recreational, if that’s all one is after. That’d be pretty sad.

By AmazonRed

January 8, 2008 10:39 AM | Link to this

DasV, Upon revision, I still think it’s a bit much, but not waaay too much. If you think that is be best approach, go for it! I just think in situations like that, with trife guys like that, no need to wax poetic. I would be firm and a bit stern. From my experience, giving a guy like that too much energy will not discourage him, but think there is still a slightly open crack in that door, when your goal is to cut all ties.

However, you know the situation best and also know the method that would work best. Good luck!

By Blow ME Beautifully a.k.a BLOW ME

January 8, 2008 10:39 AM | Link to this

OH by the way Truth I was actually agreeing with you @ 10:29am

By Blow ME Beautifully a.k.a BLOW ME

January 8, 2008 10:41 AM | Link to this

Hello Sexy Leggs, Ared, Cemeeli

By Rell

January 8, 2008 10:42 AM | Link to this

@DASv…..MY we are full of ourselves this morning..and what makes you think that what you posted added something…????…just lame!

By brown_sugar_vixen

January 8, 2008 10:42 AM | Link to this

Cemeeli girl thanks for the breakfast could use that this morning.

As for the topic. I never fallin head over heals in love with someone. Really never beleived that whole fairtale things. I do find that men have grown on me that allowed to me develop a love for them. I put love aside because most of us envision love first type of thing happening before we even know if a man or women is

a) Capible of giving & recieving love. b) Before we even truly know this person.

Call me odd but love is not something I feel for a person even after 3 months or more of knowing someone. I can’t say that I’ve ever been with someone that I didn’t interest me.

By Got that?

January 8, 2008 10:43 AM | Link to this

Love is no different for men or women. It takes time to develop and flourish. Everything else is pure infatuation, misrepresented as love.

By Beautiful

January 8, 2008 10:43 AM | Link to this

Rell what is wrong with you this morning!!! the info i get about men came from a man! i didn’t make this shyt up. i want an apology cause i didn’t do shyt to you for you to come at me that way!

By DASv

January 8, 2008 10:47 AM | Link to this

Ared dont get me wrong. im all for cutting it down, and choppin some legs off too cause it is warranted. please excuse the poetic waxin… i get that way 1.when i am blazin mad and 2. when i am blazin…well not mad.

i want something that speaks for every female ever put in the situation, something that will make him second guess try this mess with anyone else.

its proly not feasible…. but ‘i have a dream’

By SlimOne

January 8, 2008 10:48 AM | Link to this

Morning Errybody

Off topic Comment

On topic

We all know that initially we’re attracted to a person’s outer layer, their physical attributes, etc. Over time you get a look into what’s on the insides. Sometimes what’s on the inside means more than what you on see looking back at cha.

Look at it this way…would you want to spend your hard earned money on a car with a Rolls Royce frame but that had a Kia Rio engine inside?????

By 2CPTG©

January 8, 2008 10:50 AM | Link to this

Random thoughts by 2 Can:

why can the gov’t lie to us, but we go to jail if we lie to them?

By Lady J

January 8, 2008 10:50 AM | Link to this

Hey Cemeeli!

Instant gratification Got that? and media on all levels don’t you think…

By Cemeeli

January 8, 2008 10:51 AM | Link to this

DasV i agree, mature enough to fall in love with a person you care for, and are compatible with speaks “love”. Personally i’m nervous and anxious at the same time!!! I am prepared to crown Mr. Cemeeli 10ft tall and then some. But if that God child breaks my heart…oooh.

By Blow ME Beautifully a.k.a BLOW ME

January 8, 2008 10:51 AM | Link to this

Rell That is so not true…The whole I-N-D-E-P-E-N-D-E-N-T thing…Its done for surivial. I’m independent..but the right man does have a place in my life. I know how to fall back and let a REAL man take the lead.

By The Truth

January 8, 2008 10:52 AM | Link to this

Dan good post. A chick that wants you to wait 3 months is hoping you fall before she does. Its a foolish game. I say if a woman doesn’t want to give you all she has in 3 months she isn’t feeling you. If you’ve got her heart the azz is a package deal.

If Barack is elected president, do you think he’ll throw a bar-b-que at the whitehouse? ROFLMAO at this one. We have some sick blogvillians.

By melo

January 8, 2008 10:52 AM | Link to this

Morning all. Hie Rell, miised ur input yesterday. When the lady i waz talking about checks in, i will introduce u two. Hie Cemeeli and all my sexy,independent,mature& beautiful ones out there.

By Cemeeli

January 8, 2008 10:58 AM | Link to this

Hey up Miss Blow where is Demi with his cool self? *…Staceye putting my boi on her hip…LOL! We are a crasi bunch!

brownsugar Massa giving you a break today?…glad to read ya!

By DASv

January 8, 2008 11:01 AM | Link to this

reLL i was confused until i read back and see you took my … not sayin much the WRONG way. i didnt mean anything by it. we all know you sensitive and had i seen you was already up in here i would have re-phrased. heres a tip: unless its directed it at you, dont say shyt. we all know a hit dog will holler.

unlike Beautiful i dont want no apology i just want you to ignore the h#ll outta me. thanks bah-bay

By AmazonRed

January 8, 2008 11:02 AM | Link to this

Good morning Blow Me.

By angel007

January 8, 2008 11:04 AM | Link to this

Slim - I like that last post. It mimics what lots of people are doing these days.

I truly beleive if ppl looked past living in the moment or investing so much of themselves in the outlayers we’d all be better off.

Hell I know if I go out and see a Bentley and like all that it has to offer why pass it up. I’m dayum sho not gonna go get a Chyrsler 300 possed as a Bently. To many of us all dressed up in mix matching azz personalities hard to see who the orginal manifacturers are!

By Got that?

January 8, 2008 11:04 AM | Link to this

Lady J, very true. Sad thing is most people wouldn’t recognize love if it slapped them in the face, because of how misconstrued it has been made to be in the media.

By Rell

January 8, 2008 11:06 AM | Link to this

@beautiful..now does this “man” pee standing up or sitting down…it takes the average guy more than 2months to know if he wants to give you his last name..come

Come at you…did i say something out of the way to you or directed at your name?

By Dan

January 8, 2008 11:07 AM | Link to this

@abc

That [a man] would wait for three months makes him a sucka..

That assumes that he’s dry otherwise…which is not always the case.

By SexyLeggs

January 8, 2008 11:07 AM | Link to this

DasV, it’s a bit too wordy. Best approach is to be as ARed stated firm yet a bit stern. Point blank just tell him you don’t like his deception and that you’re not interested in getting to know him any better. Lose my number [you sorry piece of shyt!!!] JK about the bracketed part. Not really!

Whatever you speak will NOT stop him from approaching other women. His other head will not allow that to happen. Just speak for yourself and tell him you’re hurt at his deception. That him not speaking that he’s married was an insult to your intelligence.

By DASv

January 8, 2008 11:08 AM | Link to this

BlOw i totally agree!

attention blog bruthas i want you to understand though that for us single moms you have to understand that independence means survival. we have to be independent.

you have to understand that i lie in a bed in a house at night with the thought that whateva comes through the door (if it is the door) i have to deal with and i have to defend my two, mines. that does something to a persons psyche… soldiers never come back same as when they left.

so anyone i am with will get a call that i am running late with a flat tire but will be there in twenty NOT can you come change my tire, i am in the emergency lane of 85north…. just aint happenin.

but that mindset makes me no less marriage material than the next chick. trust.

By SlimOne

January 8, 2008 11:11 AM | Link to this

angel007 Alot of ChopShopping goes on in the ATL.

Slim is a Honda Accord. It ain’t all fancy dancy, it doesn’t cost a lot, but it’s dependable and a brand trusted by most. LOLOLOLOL!

Slim now looking up her Blue Book Value

By Dan

January 8, 2008 11:13 AM | Link to this

Trying to relate to Slim’s analogy and Angel’s reply:

What if you saw the Bentley on the lot, bought it, and it depreciated (by half)the second the front wheel hit the street? Would it still be worth the investment? And why?

For that matter, what about the 300? Costs less, retains it’s NADA value longer, and less expensive in the upkeep (i.e. repair)?

To my mind, it’s like shopping for a Polo style shirt, you can get the little polo man with the mark up, or get a regular polo style shirt for much less of an upfront investment. That is to say: What look good to you, ain’t always the best for you.

Except me

By SeanJohnson3000

January 8, 2008 11:15 AM | Link to this

@2Can….Dude u said a mouth full…

By Cemeeli

January 8, 2008 11:15 AM | Link to this

OMgoodness I’ve seen one!!! * Chyrsler 300 possed as a Bently*. Even though that was not the point…but yea.

By Rell

January 8, 2008 11:18 AM | Link to this

SENSTIVE..lol, lady please..this is my time waster for the day…plus bench i dont give a fluck what you think — fluck yo thoughts!!!!

and you were not confused..you just waiting for your chance to go in..feel better now…just know i see thru your bs lady..so yea i keep you on the blog block..but i felt like posting on what you stuck out there…

By DASv

January 8, 2008 11:20 AM | Link to this

*sexyLeggs thanx sista-girl. i pulled that ‘lose my number’ piece and ‘the insult to my intelligence’ and i am gonna carve something with the thought that it needs to be as to the point as possible.

and you right… he’s gonna do what he do. he didnt hurt me, he p** me off… and you know i gets to ‘poetic waxin’ when that nerve is touched… LOL

By Beautiful

January 8, 2008 11:21 AM | Link to this

Slim you are a mess. lol.

By Dan

January 8, 2008 11:23 AM | Link to this

DasV

I agree (with that I understood), but here’s my problem with the independent woman:

Woman: Hey, I’ma be a little late I got a flat off 285.

Man: Where ‘bout? I’ll come change it.

Woman: Naw, don’t worry about it, I called HERO, they on the way in 20 minutes at least.

Man: Babe, I can be there in 10. I’m on 285 near your crib anyway.

Woman: I’ll just meet you at the restaurant. Don’t worry about it.

That scenario assumes the guy even gets a call, and that the woman doesn’t just bring it up in conversation at dinner.

The thing of it is, being a single parent and being independent is fine because you have to be, but there is no sign of weakness in allowing someone else to help, espcially when they offer. Sometimes it’s better to just say thank you, allow them to help, becuase it’s make them feel better.

By limegpuppy

January 8, 2008 11:23 AM | Link to this

DasV - Point very well stated. Men please know that there are two types of indpenedent women that exist.

Please stop using the independent term to lump all women together. As I’m sure that I’ve stated before all women consider themselves independent in one way or another. Do men not consider themselves as a man. As we all know there are two types of men. Need I say anymore.

Gone back to lurksville USA……

By SexyLeggs

January 8, 2008 11:26 AM | Link to this

Hey BlowMe. Where’s your blog sister Staceye?

DasV, you’re 11:08 hit me hard. I feel exactly the same way. I have to rely on myself and my house is booby trapped for whichever way somebody may choose to come in. I may not get out, but I sure as hell will hear your a$$ coming in.

Also, I think it was Cemeeli that said something to the effect that there’s nothing like having a man spooning you all nestled together on a cold winter’s night. I think about that often. There’s nothing like having a man at home and you feel secure. If you don’t have that, you rely on your independent survival skills. (Sorry about the rant)!

By 2CPTG©

January 8, 2008 11:30 AM | Link to this

Random thoughts by 2 Can:

If man really went to the moon, why hasn’t he gone back?

By DreamsMaterialize

January 8, 2008 11:32 AM | Link to this

Good Morning Everyone It takes some time to know if a woman is marriage material. Women grow on men too. Think about that homie who tells you about the new chick he just met. You ask him wassup with her, and he says, “she’s cool”. That basically means “I just met her, so she’s about on par with all the other chicks I hang out with”. Some time later he’s still kickin it with her, while some others in the rotation have dropped out. So, again you ask wassup with her, and now he says, “She’s straight, I like hangin out with her.” More time goes by, and you ask the same quesion, and now he says something like, “She’s not like these other chicks. I’m feelin her.” And then after a while, when she’s the only one in rotation, you get a call like “Hey, I was working late the other night and she brought me plate. She’s down for me.” By then he’s made the decision to be with her, even if he hasn’t actually verbalized it yet.

By Staceye

January 8, 2008 11:33 AM | Link to this

Cemeeli you rang? LOL

By Angel007

January 8, 2008 11:33 AM | Link to this

Dan please don’t misconstrue my point, as that is not what I’m saying. Let me break this down so that there is no confusion.

If see something (referring to a man)I like and it is original…not superficial or pieced together then why pass it up. I just used the Bently car and what is has to offer as an example. Hell it could be a mazada, a ford, a lexus…etc. But what I don’t want a fake azz person, thats been to the chop shop, and now representin somethin that they aren’t. Too many possers out there leaving ppl with the short end of the stick cuz they aren’t reppin what’s suppossed to be in the original package!

By pisces08

January 8, 2008 11:33 AM | Link to this

It doesn’t take a man long to determine he’s there for the long haul. Men, real men know, 2 months maybe 3.

By DASv

January 8, 2008 11:34 AM | Link to this

rell i said to ignore me … but fine:

get in what exactly?? i didnt say anything to you. and i was not trynna insult anyone as you implied. and when you came at me you spoke personally, not for the blog … the moderator for today is Bella, not you.

and truth be tole i was gonna co-sign your post on it takin time for a true committment to be made. in fact, i still will. cause imma big girl like that!

i am sorry you took my last sentence in the wrong way. ~now let it go, bruh

By Blow ME Beautifully a.k.a BLOW ME

January 8, 2008 11:35 AM | Link to this

LIMEAPUPPY…STANDING OVIATION!!!So on point!

CO-SIGN,

Blow ME Beautifully

By AmazonRed

January 8, 2008 11:38 AM | Link to this

DasV, so does being a mother mean you don’t always make the most rational decisions in hopes of being independent?

I think if it makes more sense and it’s safer to have a dude come change your tire, you should do it. How is that a threat to your independence?

I have called AAA many a times for flats and lock outs. Not because I’m independent but because I pay for the membership. LOL. I doubt I’d pass up help from a man I trust, just because I’m independent. In fact, the last time I had a flat, I called the guy I was dating to come wait with me while the AAA man came. I dont’ think that mentality will change if I became a single parent.

By the way, I was LOL @ your “I have a dream” part. Girl power!

By SexyLeggs

January 8, 2008 11:39 AM | Link to this

Dan, if I made the phone call it would go like this:

Woman: Hey, I’ma be a little late I got a flat off 285.

Man: Where ‘bout? I’ll come change it.

Woman: Naw, don’t worry about it, I called HERO, they on the way in 20 minutes at least.

Man: Babe, I can be there in 10. I’m on 285 near your crib anyway.

Woman: Thank you, I’m calling to cancel Hero. See you soon!

By AmazonRed

January 8, 2008 11:40 AM | Link to this

Wow @ the fiercely independent ladies. I call that stubborn. LOL. I will still call the man of the hour to come to my house and kill a spider. That doesn’t take away at all from my independence, it just affirms my choice to outsource services, if I so choose. LOL

By SexyLeggs

January 8, 2008 11:41 AM | Link to this

ARed, I have the box at my desk and will be putting more things in it. Girl, this box looks like it went around the world and back.

By DASv

January 8, 2008 11:44 AM | Link to this

Dan see Limes post about there being two types of independent thinking women. i think there is some truth there.

that is why i pray to IAM to temper my gifts to handle what i have with humility… keep me humble to accept help (when someone volunteers to help) and to ask for it (when i have to make ppl aware of the situation i am in and need help).

By SeanJohnson3000

January 8, 2008 11:44 AM | Link to this

Blog Ladies..what the phck is a Real Man?

By angel007

January 8, 2008 11:46 AM | Link to this

limegpuppy you took the words right out of my mouth. Independent is a commonly used word that gets toooo much attention. Instead of a man noticing that a women has many independent traits he looks at her automatically as not being able to take assistance from a man and that is not true.

Women who claim to be independent but really are bitter make all ladies look bad.

Of course if you have to learn to change a tire, or oil, or anything else handy because you can’t rely on an SO, then how does that make you anymore or less willing to accept help when offered. Sh*t if offered by a man I know then surely i’ll take the help…Not gonna make me anyless a woman rather I consider my self independent or not.

By AmazonRed

January 8, 2008 11:46 AM | Link to this

limegpuppy - Right on about your 11:23 post. I agree.

By Cemeeli

January 8, 2008 11:49 AM | Link to this

Sexyleggs/DasV

See Dan’s response to our independence! I am so LEARNING To succumb to what he’s saying about ALLOW the help! Yes we have to survive be exp. being single parents. But i’ll be darn if i’d permit “Independent Ingnorance” and be lonely.

Yes Sexyleggs there’s nothing like you coming home to know that your man is gonna be there! Winter months, even better, everybody in the house is going to bed EARLY!!! :)

…but hey we’re surviving!

By AmazonRed

January 8, 2008 11:51 AM | Link to this

SexyLeggs - Thank you! I’m cracking up at the description of that box.

By Dan

January 8, 2008 11:52 AM | Link to this

And that why I’ma SexxyLegg Fan!

Knowing the difference between having to be independent and being stubborn to prove your independence.

@ Angel:

This is Atlanta. Being fake is what a lot of people here do. They go into debt, to keep up with the Joneses’, they buy trendy clothing, tell lies about where they work/ what they do/ where they live.

This city is becoming less about substance and more about style. And while style is not a bad thing, most people never bother to ask themselves the question: is it the clothes/ car/money? Or is it me?

When you can find someone (man/woman) in this town that knows the difference between who you are and what you possess, you’re doing good.

But start to look for that difference in (I hate this word) swag, and you’ll see it.

By Rell

January 8, 2008 11:52 AM | Link to this

slim - for you Blue Book value

100= wifey 90 = top notch female 80 = seal the deal player 70 = good women 60 = above average 50 = workable 40 = charge this one to the game 30 = you can do better 20 = you need your arse beat 10 = see above 0= killyoself

automatic deductions

-50 points for any disease -10 point for every 10pounds overwieght -10 point for every kid the woman has -10 point for every 10yrs the women is over 18

Looks

• 5 points per degree (starting from 5) so if she is a six she gets 5points if she is a 7 she is a 10, but if she is a 4 she loses 5points

Cooking

+10 points for cooking

body

+5 points for nice backside +5 points for nice “twins” +5 ponts for cute feet -10 points for ugly feet

Characteristics

+15 points for the brain game(GOOD) +5 points for a good personality +5 points good hygiene -5 points bad hygiene -15 points for ghetto attitude

and yea have fun with this..lol

By SexyLeggs

January 8, 2008 11:54 AM | Link to this

A real man is a responsible man. He takes care of himself and if he has a family he definitely takes care of that. He goes to work. He spends quality time with his SO and/or family. He treats his parents w/respect on this earth or in heaven. The home unit is striving. Albeit there may be problems, lines of communication are open. Respect is given at all times. I vent more on this question, but have to go to mailroom…LOL

By limegpuppy

January 8, 2008 11:55 AM | Link to this

Blow ME Beautifully

Thanks girl! Just getting a little tired of hearing this independent women crap. Independent is small benefit to a women’s personality and does not reflect her character in it’s entirety.

By DASv

January 8, 2008 11:57 AM | Link to this

aRed i think that because i am a mother i much more rational then i would be not having children i am responsible for.

what i am saying as far as my independent nature goes is this (and i am going to put in play-book fashion like everyone else):

Venus realizes she has a flat tire

Venus pulls car over, muttering under her breathe and maybe cussing, all the while thinking back to the last time tires were changed/serviced

Venus pulls cellphone and begins scrolling for Mr.V’s number, while taking Palm out to locate HERO number and restaurant number in case Mr.V doesnt answer and pulling service records from glove compartment

Venus tells Mr.V she has flat, and when the tires were lasted serviced and finds out if he is close or if she should call HERO whos number she is staring at in her Palm

MrV tells Venus he is on the way and not to call HERO

Venus says OK but reminds MrV that kids are in the car and still need to be dropped off and suggests it might be better for him to come snatch up the kids and get them to the babysitters while Venus waits for HERO unit

MrV says he is on the way and Venus will take the kids in his car to the sitters while he waits for HERO cause he is calling the tire company to fuss somebody out and make sure this will be handled first thing in the morning

Venus and MrV meet at restaurant and have lovely evening

By Cemeeli

January 8, 2008 11:58 AM | Link to this

Hey Staceye…can you put Demi down now!?!

limepuppy thanks for coming out of Lurksville Ga. I enjoyed your comment most def.

By Blow ME Beautifully a.k.a BLOW ME

January 8, 2008 12:01 PM | Link to this

SEANJOHNSON3000

Do you really even want to go there?

I mean that can vary from woman to woman. Depend on what qualities she likes or values the most.

Generally idea:

Hard working, determine, ambition, loyal, respect, knows his roles, e.i., Taking out the trash, cut grass, open doors, pays for dinner, Has his on own….One who doesn’t depend on YOU. Respect his mother. Kill BUGS!! yuck! Can make me feel like a QUEEN.

I can go on and on…..I guess this is enough for now…

By Rell

January 8, 2008 12:03 PM | Link to this

@SJ3K..there version of a real man..is someone with the rubber neck..he always says yes dear..he p** sitting down..and they can go shopping on saturday afternoon and watch i love new york together…lol

yea what is a real man….

By Cemeeli

January 8, 2008 12:05 PM | Link to this

2C …what the Wii!?!

If man really went to the moon, why hasn’t he gone back?

…didn’t find oil, diamond, money…you know…

By DASv

January 8, 2008 12:07 PM | Link to this

see rell that is why i cant stay mad at you for long… LOLROTF at your 1134 post. you are wrong for that

By DASv

January 8, 2008 12:07 PM | Link to this

see rell that is why i cant stay mad at you for long… LOLROTF at your 1152 post. you are wrong for that

By AmazonRed

January 8, 2008 12:09 PM | Link to this

DasV…this will come off controversal, but I will say it because it’s true for many single mothers, though not for you: Many single mothers became that way due to irrational decisions. The addition of offspring can make a person “grow up” so to speak, but doesn’t make them necessarily a more rational person just because they have children.

The play by play you provided is not much different from my own except for the fact that the babysitter part is a non factor. I spend 24/7 taking care of the most important person in my life: Me.

I know the mothers on here will say I won’t understand until I have children, and I can not argue with that. However, rational behavior should be present long before the bun is in the oven.

By Poppa Grande

January 8, 2008 12:09 PM | Link to this

Dan Style over substance isn’t just an Atlanta thing. I think that its becoming american thing. People are so caught up in materials. Listen to a lot of commerical hip-hip (ya know the stuff that ends up on the radio) it talks about more about what they have than who they are. Shows like MTV’s Sweet 16 just keeps it going.

That isn’t just limited to Atlanta.

By angel007

January 8, 2008 12:10 PM | Link to this

Dan - nothing personal towards you, but I hear that alot. People in ATL are fake. Sh*t half the people you meet aren’t even from here….hell you will find these issues all over the US. This is an issue that has been going on since the beginning of time. People will always desire what they can’t have. Make ways to keep up with the joneses, and misrepresent themselves.

I personally am not on that BULLSHT. My life will be what i want and make it to be. I don’t want to keep up with the crowd I’m the one the takes the road less traveled. I could care less about how much someone else thinks I should spend on *quality materialistic things. It’s all hype and that’s why the rich is getting richer cuz they smarter than most. I view myself one in the same. So like I said before and I won’t visit this topic again. Man or woman can find worth in one another, but each person will have a different percetion of how valuable the individual is to them.

By Dan

January 8, 2008 12:10 PM | Link to this

@Blow me: NBF (no Blog fight)

But in the “Real Man” equation you gave, just what does the woman do?

And if you say anything about “just sex” I’ma have to recind my offer and go at it.

By Mo (now known as Moeisha)

January 8, 2008 12:11 PM | Link to this

Hey Cemeeli and Staceye! Mo waving

SJ3000 What is a real man? MHO - a man that is confident, not afraid of commitment, respectful, hard-working, flexible, open-minded, well-rounded. Just a few of the attributes that I think a real man should possess. Now I am sure the women of Blogsville can add and subtract from that list. Ultimately it depends on the woman so get ready for quite a few opinions!

I see we have our regular Blog fights going on!! LOL

By 2CPTG©

January 8, 2008 12:11 PM | Link to this

Random thoughts by 2 Can:

If the Earth is 75% water, why do we have to pay for it (water bills)?

By Kym-Proud Steeler Nation Member since 1994

January 8, 2008 12:11 PM | Link to this

Good Afternoon,

I am not even going to attempt to go back and read all of the things posted.

What made me love the one that I didnt take a glance at before was the fact that he charmed me. He charmed me by just talking and having opinions and making me see his way of thinking without ever belittling mine. We shared our ideals and then it grew from there. Now granted it all went to pot when the charm wore off and a bit of reality set in. But I was wiser and better for the experience.

By SexyLeggs

January 8, 2008 12:13 PM | Link to this

Rell, I just read two versions of what A REAL MAN is. Nothing coincides w/your post. You have got to be kidding. You of all people on this blog should know that not one female blogger here wants a rubber neck yes man…everything isn’t always delivered w/ajoke!

By SlimOne

January 8, 2008 12:17 PM | Link to this

Rell LOL! You are cwazy. Good to see a lighter side to you for a change. I might have to take a calcus,geometry, trigonometry, & algebra refresher course with these guidelines. Let’s see….

Somewhere in here I guess:

100= wifey 90 = top notch female 80 = seal the deal player 70 = good women 60 = above average

automatic deductions

-50 pts for any disease—> N/A

-10 pts for every 10lbs overwieght—> N/A (what about underweight? LOL)

-10 pts for per kid—> N/A

-10 pts for every 10yrs women is over 18—> I’m 29 so I lose 10pts here

Looks

On a bad day 7 = 10pts On a good day 8.5 = 15.5pts

Cooking

+10pts

Body +5 for cute feet

(Can itty bitties be considered nice?)

Characteristics

+15 brain game (intelligence or oral?) +5 personality +5 good hygiene

LMAO!

By limegpuppy

January 8, 2008 12:17 PM | Link to this

@ Cemeeli - welcome. I was gonna stay in lurksville, but topic like this makes it hard to stay at bay.

Rell - there you go with that ole whack azz version of what women think is a man. What planet do you live on? Dude he asked the ladies and unless you got mizz kitty n’between ya legs I suggest ya keep ya mouth close nukka.

By Rell

January 8, 2008 12:20 PM | Link to this

@dasv…just know that this does not get under my skin at all lady….trust me…you guys keep me entertained and on my toes

@ared..i agree…i think most women confuse being resoureful with being independent….i was raised by a single parent so i know the difference…she mad sure the dollar went a long way..me and my brother did the manual stuff best we good for our age

By Cemeeli

January 8, 2008 12:22 PM | Link to this

Dang it 2C! I luv this dude…:) .

Because we have government that controls er’thang!

By Rell

January 8, 2008 12:23 PM | Link to this

@sexyleggs…calm down grandma…yes i was joking..dayum!!!..lol

@slim - with the blue book..you get 50points off top and add or subract from there..let me know your blue book value based on my list

By angel007

January 8, 2008 12:24 PM | Link to this

I can’t even type the words to truly define a real man, because once again when I find him he’ll know. All the things that are being described are just small pieces of charm turned on to capture each other attention and the right moment.

By SeanJohnson3000

January 8, 2008 12:24 PM | Link to this

@ Rell…bruh…we are treated like black quaterbacks in the NFL…women are quick to question our authority,leadership skills, decisions making skills and overall knowledge…

@ Blow…I eat from the top of the food chain…so we can go there…when you define the role of a man you in turn… open yourself up to have roles defined as a women….i had a post commenting on DasV “independence” post..it didnt go through….but basically stated that ALOT of women are single mothers because their pseudo independence lead them to leave or have a man leave them….and its deep rooted bacause all this talk about a real man are key signs that most of yall are not ready to take a step back and voluntarily allow a man to lead…which is his natural role…you come from my rib…i didnt come from yours..

By melo

January 8, 2008 12:27 PM | Link to this

pays for dinner, BlowMe This is what a lot of Geogia women are obsessed with thats why the men just wanna fluck.

By kinderbabe

January 8, 2008 12:28 PM | Link to this

good afternoon, all.:) it’s too bad that a discussion about love (from what i see on this blog) brings out the ugliest side of people…how sad and ironic.:(

meanwhile, i have dated someone before that i wasn’t initially attracted to. usually, that was b/c i was too busy measuring their level of physical attractiveness or they said something stupid that turned me off…lol. but i have had 2 relationships that turned out well in spite of the lack of initial attraction. the dynamics changed over a short period of time. we wound up getting along well.

those who display love on a daily basis in simple ways have the least difficult time w/the “love experience.” when people struggle to see the good in things on a daily basis, it’s almost impossible to expect them to see that in someone else or themselves for that matter. love is what love does.

By DASv

January 8, 2008 12:30 PM | Link to this

ARED if i understand your position correctly, then i co-sign your thought.

the choice to have and raise a child should be made after applying rational thought to what it entails, the changes it will require, the sacrifices that will have to be made. a lot of single mothers dont completely understand whats involved until after lil johnny is here. that is a sad situation for all. too often mothers immediately resent their change in circumstances, never bond with the child and the child ends up abused or worse dead.

i appreciate that you would say that my play-by-play was not unlike how you would have handled the situation. it highlights the fact that we all have something to care for, even if its just self… and we all have to work at tempering independence with vulnerability/human-ness (if thats a word).

i think the issue on the blog is the blog bruthas not seeing us as capable of being submissive and following the lead ….cant speak to that though, but thats the feelin i am getting.

By Blow ME Beautifully a.k.a BLOW ME

January 8, 2008 12:30 PM | Link to this

DAN I guess you are the MAN of the hour..I was waiting for you MEN to say that….Well I didn’t answer that because that WAS NOT the question.

SJ3000 ASKED : WHat is a real man? That was the question that I asked…

Now are you asking me now to tell you what a woman does? I personally offer more than just sex…I dont’ even put that on my quality list, because I have so much more to offer than just that. I mean dont’ get me wrong I am a SCORPIO. lol. A good woman offers; Respect, loyalty, true friendship, while he is cutting grass..she is cleaning and preparing dinner, While he kills the bug…she is puttin another load in the washer. When he speaks she listens and encourage. He is the head of the household she respects that and plays her position.

BUT ONLY…and I do mean ONLY for the right man! He has to be an ALL STAR player for a real Independent woman to fully let down her guard and give herself unselfishly…STAND UP GUYS ONLY Dan don’t get me started please!

SexyLEGGS Wow we had similiar responses……

By Rell

January 8, 2008 12:31 PM | Link to this

@lime…..not you lady…ok you get issued one free pass for today….it was a joke…calm down….lol

at any rate is your name - cookie, pumkin, coco….why do all heavy chicks have nicknames associated with food..lol

By AmazonRed

January 8, 2008 12:32 PM | Link to this

I am loving limegpuppy right now. LMAO at her response to Rell.

By AmazonRed

January 8, 2008 12:36 PM | Link to this

SJ3000 - I’m feeling your 12:24 to Blow. The part about women coming from the man’s rib was particularly profound. Sometimes us women need a little reminder as to the natural order of things (with a little remixing over the years *smile *)

By Willie Dynamite

January 8, 2008 12:37 PM | Link to this

Coming outta lurksville to comment ;

I blame the game for this question. Women (some) will make a good man wait and jump through hoops just to get to know her better. This is because some lame azz dude has done her wrong in the past. Some dudes will run all over a women because some chick made him jump through hoops when his intentions were honorable.

Most people have come to not trust their own intuitions and feelings because of previous relations. Either way if a person doesn’t fit into some lil box they have then they won’t even have the chance to know if they are compatible.

Guppy I agree with your 11:23, but at what point does a woman realize she is one or the other if ever?

Rell & 3000 we can’t blame the ladies for not honestly knowing what a real man is. These dudes have muddied and watered the game down to the point that women pat themselves on the back for LETTING a real man be a man. SAD!!

By AmazonRed

January 8, 2008 12:41 PM | Link to this

DASv - What a great response to my post. Thanks for your candor.

By Blow ME Beautifully a.k.a BLOW ME

January 8, 2008 12:41 PM | Link to this

SJ3000 WOW…so sexily stated….wow!

But…to me..that was some BS.

You know why?

I have grown up with the pleasure of having both parents in the household. And a EXCELLENT example of a MAN. It’s really unfortunate for me because my dad set the bar so high. He showed me what a man should do and how he should take care of his family. So in essence, I learned what a MAN is from my father. He also taughted me to be independent and to be a team player when the REAL MAN came along.

As Indie Arie once stated-

There is no subsitute for the Truth It either is or it isn’t.

My concept for a Real Man is not off…I had a wonderful teacher. I can allow a MAN to lead…That’s exactly what I want..one who has my Honest interest at heart. Not any ole BLOW JOE! By any means…I am fully aware of my roles to substain a REAL MAN. But nice post sj3000 !!lol!

By Kym-Proud Steeler Nation Member since 1994

January 8, 2008 12:45 PM | Link to this

SJ I have no clue what you mean by a real man is other than a human with the necessary genetic makeup(penis) to be define as a man. That is a real man. Now if you are asking me about what makes a good man? Good for who? Me or someone else? Because what is good to me maybe useless to someone else. But if you are asking me what is it that is in the essense of a man that captures my heart..

Well then for me… that is in his style(not what he is wearing but how he is wearing his life.) How is he dealing with the day to day? If he is facing challenges and problems? Is he wishing them all away? or is he steadfast, always unmoveable and building on the experiences of those challenges looking forward and not back.

For me the true essence of a man is not in what he has but how he is works what he’s got and plans ahead.

Doing so called men’s job do not a man make..you can train a monkey to take out the trash.

I have learned by observing men that their true essence shows through in little ways..not just if he hold the door open for me but if he holds it open for the people behind me.

Not if he treats his mama well but if he treats everyone’s mama well.

By Blow ME Beautifully a.k.a BLOW ME

January 8, 2008 12:46 PM | Link to this

Melo Wow….so what. Women are suppose to pay for dinner now?

I mean I don’t have a problem doing it. Later on down the line. That’s good and well into the relationship. But I most men dont’ mind paying. Most men feel like men when they pay for their dates/girlfriends/friends/wife/mother’s tab.

By AmazonRed

January 8, 2008 12:46 PM | Link to this

Willie - Why does a making a man wait or jump thru hoops mean that some man has done her wrong? Maybe she was raised to know that she’s worth waiting for.

By Staceye

January 8, 2008 12:48 PM | Link to this

ARED I kill my own spiders! LOL

rell I have asthma…so -50 for me already son! LOL

SJ I’m sorry…what do you mean by questioning your authority? Are you referring to a child? I just do not want to believe that you think men have some “authority” over women? If so….that is a load of SHYT! The only man with authority over me is God. And the last time I checked he is not walking this earth!

And oh yeah…a woman chooses to be a single mom! Yeah right! Just because she chooses to not let some fool treat her badly, be his door mat and act like a sponge and soak of his shyt. Its her fault that she must now raise that child alone! If men would stop being so damned trife and then trying to to play that, “I am man what I say goes” drama….treat a woman they way you want to be treated. Don’t do something to her that you would not want done to you….maybe things would not be so screwed up. I’ll be single to death before I become some weak azz female letting some man telling my grown azz what to do like I am some naive, spineless, mindless, wimp!

Cemeeli I had to put Demi down for this one! LOL

**

By Beautiful

January 8, 2008 12:48 PM | Link to this

most of yall are not ready to take a step back and voluntarily allow a man to lead…which is his natural role…you come from my rib…i didnt come from yours

very well stated.

By Wow

January 8, 2008 12:50 PM | Link to this

wow

By Lady J

January 8, 2008 12:50 PM | Link to this

@Blow ME Beautifully a.k.a BLOW ME LMAO…you are funny…:)

By AmazonRed

January 8, 2008 12:54 PM | Link to this

Staceye - I can tell you kill your own spiders. LOL. I do as well, when there is no other option.

Blow Me - We come from very similar backgrounds. I feel the same way about my dad too.

By Fax Me

January 8, 2008 12:58 PM | Link to this

How come none of you did’nt give a blog citation to A Friend for that long azz post?????

Where is that Demi guy? He’s good at giving out the blog citations

By Dan

January 8, 2008 1:02 PM | Link to this

@SJ

That rib line was right on.

But (NBF)…

I lot cats out here ain’t ready for that, as you so eloquently stated. Some of them got the game messed up from jump.

For the blog ladies: My argument is three-fold: 1) cats like that flucking it up for the brothers do/trying, leaving us with bitter and hostile women (Hi! Staceye [j/k]). 2) Bitter or not, I can’t let that stop me from doing what I was taught to do as a man; and 3) If the chick I’m at can’t see it ‘til I’m gone what she has/had, then that’s on her I’ma keep it pushing.

By AmazonRed

January 8, 2008 1:04 PM | Link to this

Fax Me - Blog trolls tend to not pay their fines. I think it was better to ignore him/her.

By Willie Dynamite

January 8, 2008 1:06 PM | Link to this

Red If he is the one and you know it then making him jump through hoops is either because some dude did you wrong or like Men you are holding out for better. I did say SOME. It wasn’t meant as a blanket statement. It has nothing to do with how you were raised. I’m sure you were also raised to recognize something good when you saw it and not play around and lose it.

By 2CPTG©

January 8, 2008 1:06 PM | Link to this

Random thoughts by 2 Can

Is there a better feeling than an orgasm?

By AmazonRed

January 8, 2008 1:13 PM | Link to this

LOL @ all the guys pointing the finger at other cats, when most of y’all admit to being caught up in that playa game at one point or another. I’m sure each of y’all contributed messing up the game a bit at one point or another. Get real, guys.

By Lady J

January 8, 2008 1:17 PM | Link to this

yeah 2 eating my crab legs watching the wire…

By DASv

January 8, 2008 1:19 PM | Link to this

blog bruthas I am truly sorry for this:Most men feel like men when they pay for their dates/girlfriends/friends/wife/mother’s tab. AND for this I just do not want to believe that you think men have some “authority” over women? If so….that is a load of SHYT!

I know that you do not measure or equate your manhood with what you are able to pay for. has anyone read a gathering of old men?? that is literary proof that ‘manhood’ has nothing to do with material gain. and we all know the scriptures say ‘the head of every woman is the man, the head of every man, christ and the head of christ, God’ - - some refer to that as the headship rule. its a pecking order. we know IAM established a pecking order with the nation of Israel, so naturally one would be in the marital arrangement.

and as sorry as I am for those comments, i have to take issue at what you all are implying… and in response i say this:

we cannot follow if we are not led. whateva we lack, whateva we distort, whateva we fail to grasp… the deficiency lies ultimately with you. where we find ourselves is as a result of what you failed to do, or this is where you have led us to be.

i dont think so much that we are incapable of being led, as it is that you dont have the patience/time/concern/love to invest to get us where you see us being. you are too focused on whats in it for you, what pleasure you have with us and to obessessed with pointing the finger and not being held accountable.

ARED and I chatted earlier about the plight in which females find themselves too often: pregnant and with no resources. that didnt just ‘happen’. there is too little statagizing going on by you brothers. i shutter to look in on chess clubs meeting at local elementaries and not seeing one black child.

women so easily bash themselves and look to see what they couldve, shouldve done better, but imho this ‘problem’ lies with you brothers who have not stategized a plan to rescue, if not our race, at least yourself and the woman you choose.

JMHO ~ sorry for long post (patiently waiting for citation)

By SexyLeggs

January 8, 2008 1:19 PM | Link to this

Ok, now I’m grandma…that was funny…NOT! It’s all good Rell.

By AmazonRed

January 8, 2008 1:19 PM | Link to this

Willie - A good man is going to be there for you whether you make him wait one day or 100. I may agree with you on the hoops part but you also put waiting in that category as well. Some folks are raised to “make him prove” love. If you listen to courting stories from my grandparents day, there was a lot of hoop jumping going on. Guys now a days wouldn’t go thru most of the trouble they did back in the day. Just the way the game has evolved now. Doesn’t mean it always breaks down to some woman being “wronged” tho.

And I did notice you say SOME. And that is why my comment pertains to. I wasnt speaking on my own personal situation.

By Beautiful

January 8, 2008 1:22 PM | Link to this

Wii daddy the feeling of first meeting the guy who you think is the one or driving a brand new car home.

wait, on 2nd thought … … . NO!

By SeanJohnson3000

January 8, 2008 1:22 PM | Link to this

Blog Ladies i know yall say that men are not serious when it comes to relationships..but…How many of yall wanna get married?…if the answer is yes..do me a favor a really read the VOWS…nah…yall aint ready…

@Blow…you gotta a lot of spunk…i like that…but…lil momma…u need to slow down and listen..if we was together…thats a problem we would have….luckily there are ways to keep you from talking so much..

@ Staceye…you NEW name is CSI….special victims unit…just messn with you……whats your deal?

By Rell

January 8, 2008 1:26 PM | Link to this

@ared..yea i laid waste and destruction to alot of women..but did i know better…YES, did i care NO…see i rell was at the point of no return with not being me so i acted out..i was so tired of being mistreated and abused..that i was only happy when i was able to inflict the same pain in women..was it right NO…i learned that problem was not the women but me….i was insecure, weak, low self-esteem, and had a problem communicating my desires to women. See i was raised that every women is a queen and deserving of my respect and undying admiration..imagine my horror when i ran into th w*******!!..so instead of focusing on me and my thought process i wreak havoc in our community concerning relations…feel me…how is that for honesty…hopefully we can be more honest in 08 and stop with the flukery!

By AmazonRed

January 8, 2008 1:29 PM | Link to this

SJ3000 - WHO is not ready? You need to name names or refrain from lumping all of us “blog ladies” in the same boat.

By limegpuppy

January 8, 2008 1:29 PM | Link to this

Rell - I’ll take my pass, today I didn’t get none of Cemeeli’s breakfast, plus it’s lunch time but I’m back and thinking more rational. Just so ya know there is none other like me…so no i”m not cookie, coco, or whoeva else named after food. Plus lime green is my favorite color, not my favorite food. Nothing wrong w/being a big girl, but thats not me..wink wink.

Don’t let the name fool ya.

@ Dynamite, I can’tnswer your question because I don’t use the term independent to represent my personality as a whole so. But lets just say if you’ve ever known f any women who do, then when you meet them they will be one or the other.

By Blow ME Beautifully a.k.a BLOW ME

January 8, 2008 1:32 PM | Link to this

Kym I can agree to that….Although I would love to find that monkey who can take out trash

By The Truth

January 8, 2008 1:32 PM | Link to this

Ladies, its a shame you have to live your lives like that, thinking ev1 is a threat. Its not meant to be that way. Life is way better than that. The thing is your protecting yourself from tsomething that will mostlikely never come and when and if it does you will, like most people, be totally caught off guard. Its kind of how some women date thinking their guy is gonna cheat. If he never does you’ve already paid a high cost anyway.

I live by the code I cant control most things but I can control how I process them. I back that up with a loaded .45. LOL DASV if you get a flat call me baby. I’ll take care of that thing for ya.

By melo

January 8, 2008 1:36 PM | Link to this

2CAN,Is there a better feeling than an orgasm? yep..looking at ur phat portfolio and feeling secure.

By Rell

January 8, 2008 1:37 PM | Link to this

@amazonred…your grandmothers day are long gone..because women back then knew how to KEEP A MAN..not dispose of him when he p** her off..so lets focus on now…what changes can you make in yourself to get over your relationship blues…everyone can improve..you are not the bee’s knees hun…so what can or would you do to prove that you are worthy of a mans attention and time.

By Dan

January 8, 2008 1:39 PM | Link to this

@A Red

I have to cosign Rell’s post.

There’s a time when you truly don’t know any better. Whether it’s peer or internal pressure to fit in, you do things that affect women in ways you don’t know about for YEARS.

It’s after you get a little age and understanding (or go through it yourself) that you start to understand the pain you may have caused.

My beef is not with the 21 and under cat that doesn’t know, but with the 21+ year old cat that does, and is still doing it.

By melo

January 8, 2008 1:42 PM | Link to this

Most men feel like men when they pay for their dates/girlfriends/friends/wife/mother’stab I know most drug dealers etc dont mind showing their loot and paying(they have to dispose of the money quick any way), when u go on dates.That does not qualify them as man.I see BlwMe. ure attracting that type.

By Cemeeli

January 8, 2008 1:45 PM | Link to this

2C what’s up guy?

Is there a better feeling than an orgasm?

To answer: No

…sex AND having an orgasm is one of the most beautiful arts God created. My lord!….creating such fitting body parts that give you such feeling…it couldn’t have been created better by NO ONE!!!

By Kym-Proud Steeler Nation Member since 1994

January 8, 2008 1:48 PM | Link to this

Joe Gibbs resigned…awww Joe dont go!! I like him.

By melo

January 8, 2008 1:48 PM | Link to this

If so….that is a load of SHYT! The only man with authority over me is God. And the last time I checked he is not walking this earth! The odds are good that Staceye will come out before ‘08 is over.Watch this space for a blog announcement and blog meet to celebrate.Rosie will be in attendance.

By The Truth

January 8, 2008 1:49 PM | Link to this

Independent woman is an oxymoron. By nature they want to follow but don’t have a leader. Also, they’ve never been dominated (not in the negative sense ofthe word) so don’t know how. However, in nature, domination creates submission. Come right and hard and she’ll lay her shield down. 100% I’ve never in my life met an independant woman, only a woman that was forced to fend for herself. My mother was strong but not independent. The fellas that bytch up force a woman to man up, hence the unbalance we now see. Still, if your program is high and tight she’ll see it and make any adjustment necessary. Its whats in her. Thats the magic to a happy relationship. you know whats naturally in her and therfore know when your not getting it.

By Blow ME Beautifully a.k.a BLOW ME

January 8, 2008 1:51 PM | Link to this

ARED Yeah we do..I see..A complete household…

SJ3000 Thank you…I take that as a compliment..spunky. LMAO@ ways to keep my mouth shut. You wouldn’t have to if u are bringing the TRUTH…I’ll put my pink heels on and wear em if he’s worth it. Get all the WAY submissive!!

What does our opinion have to do with not knowing the VOWS? We are not ready to get married according to who?? YOU!! Is that waht you are trying to say?1?!?!??!

By melo

January 8, 2008 1:55 PM | Link to this

Dan,the 21+ year old cat that does, and is still doing it. Cats 21 to 24 dont know jerk about women and are still in the thick of flucking,rotation etc.They come outa their own around 25.Remember, women mature faster than guys so women are in better position at 21 and up to be thinking about marriage,kids etc than guys. If marriage has not hapenned by 26,27,28,the women are despondent,fronting like it dont matter and less discriminating than at 21/22.

By melo

January 8, 2008 1:55 PM | Link to this

Dan,the 21+ year old cat that does, and is still doing it. Cats 21 to 24 dont know jerk about women and are still in the thick of flucking,rotation etc.They come outa their own around 25.Remember, women mature faster than guys so women are in better position at 21 and up to be thinking about marriage,kids etc than guys. If marriage has not hapenned by 26,27,28,the women are despondent,fronting like it dont matter and but less discriminating than at 21/22.

By AmazonRed

January 8, 2008 1:56 PM | Link to this

Rell - Darling, I am the bees knees. The woman in your scenario is not me so waste your time trying to bait some other chick today. I ain’t the one. ;-)

And Dan, you can’t co-sign with Rell’s post as he said he DID know better and I suspect most men do. At the very least you know the difference between right and wrong. Even if you DON’T (doubtful) you don’t get a pass from me. You can’t expect to lead us and then play stupid about where we’re going. Gotta hold you to a higher standard whether you are 21 or 61.

By Blow ME Beautifully a.k.a BLOW ME

January 8, 2008 1:59 PM | Link to this

*DID HE JUST SAY “WORTHY”? *

Rell: so what can or would you do to prove that you are *worthy of a mans attention and time

See that’s why you have WOMEN not tryin to hear that $hit…It goes BOTH ways RELL Both ways!! Are you worthy for each others time!

By melo

January 8, 2008 2:00 PM | Link to this

Although I would love to find that monkey who can take out trash BlowMe for a girl who professes to provide good azz sex, i find that statement puzzling and i think u seriously hang with the wrong crowd.For all the things u are looking in a good man(most legit) i shudder to think u cant find 1 good one.Its time for u to look urself in the mirror, possibly.

By SlimOne

January 8, 2008 2:02 PM | Link to this

2CPTG©

Is there a better feeling than an orgasm?

Yea….multiple orgasms. Next question.

By DreamsMaterialize

January 8, 2008 2:03 PM | Link to this

We can always blame our past, upbringing, or other people for our failed relationships. While those things are relevant, they are easy to identify and accept, but it’s much harder for us to recognize and deal with our own contribution to the dissolution of our past relationships because it means we have to take a hard look at ourselves. So, here’s a question.

What are some major things about your personality/behavior that you admit MIGHT have contributed to a failed relationship?

Since I opened my mouth, I’ll go first. I tend to take on everything on my own. I don’t discuss it, I don’t ask anyone for help (family, friends, no one). I just handle it and keep rolling. Not being willing to share the burden contributed to one of my failed relationships.

By SexyLeggs

January 8, 2008 2:03 PM | Link to this

Off topic - Leap Year Drink

This drink becomes a special at many bars on February 29 but is then forgotten for the next four years.

The mixture of gin and vermouth gives the Leap Year Cocktail a certain affinity to a Martini, but the addition of Grand Marnier makes this cocktail unique. Gary Regan in his book The Joy of Mixology states that Harry Craddock of the Savoy Bar in London created the Leap Year Cocktail to celebrate February 29, 1928. The Savoy Cocktail Book insists that this drink has been “responsible for more proposals than any other cocktail that has ever been mixed.” Begging pardon, but February 29 is also Sadie Hawkins Day, which may have something to do with this mass plunge into wedlock.

INGREDIENTS

2 ounces gin 1/2 ounce Grand Marnier 1/4 ounce fresh lemon juice Twist of lemon peel INSTRUCTIONS

Shake the gin, Grand Marnier, and lemon juice with ice; then strain into a chilled cocktail glass. Garnish with lemon peel.

By Wow

January 8, 2008 2:08 PM | Link to this

wow

By Dan

January 8, 2008 2:09 PM | Link to this

@A Red

I’m not asking for a pass from anyone. My penenace will be my own. And the stupid can’t lead the blind.

But with Rell’s post I’d like to know about what age that was… In truth, Melo hit it best, when he said 21-25 about knowledge of self.

Guess I was an early starter, cause I got my awakening at about 18. Mind you (as elaborate here before) it took the kid a while to get right, not with myself, not with a woman, but with me in God.

By Lady J

January 8, 2008 2:10 PM | Link to this

so true Dreams but those past things help make our current mistakes I think…

By Rell

January 8, 2008 2:12 PM | Link to this

@AR…i am not baiting you…but i guess you cant come up with anything so it is best to try and belittle me….so are you going to answer the question….

@blow…yes lame, i said worthy and it does work both ways..so can you look back an see where you handed out your time to someone unworthy..stop focusing so much on the symatics…..geesh….and who said i needed you hear anything..i can see you are a nut cutting female….so gon and tell us how you going to run ish from now…gon tell us

@truth..cosign your post….

By Blow ME Beautifully a.k.a BLOW ME

January 8, 2008 2:16 PM | Link to this

THE TRUTH That was statement@ 1:49 you made was so PROFOUND…and so on point. You brought a tiny sparkling tear to my eyes….A cry of Joy. That was so the TRUTH.

By Rell

January 8, 2008 2:17 PM | Link to this

@dan..to answer your question 18-30…was the age range…why?

@dm..my main problem is that i am insenstive at times…arrogant….like to do me….flirty…disrespectful….etc etc..pretty picture huh.

@slim…what number did you come up with start from 50 and add or subract

By SlimOne

January 8, 2008 2:19 PM | Link to this

Lawd, lawd, lawd have mercy!

We have this same debate, argument, conversation every week about men leading or not, independent-dependent women, folks having to prove they are worthy of another person’s time etc…

What happened to folks being attracted to each other, hanging out, just enjoying the time spent and going from there? What’s up with all the mumbo jumbo bullshyt these days.

You all (some) don’t seem to see how disoriented, disengaged, detached we are becoming with regard to human relations; especially with AA’s. The idea is to come together some kind of way, not find more ways to keep strife and strain between the sexes. We are becoming aliens to each other….but hey what do i know.

Blogville residence now throwing eggs at Slim as she slips and slides off the platform

By Mo (now known as Moeisha)

January 8, 2008 2:23 PM | Link to this

What are some major things about your personality/behavior that you admit MIGHT have contributed to a failed relationship?

Same as Dreams, handling things on my own, even in a relationship. Making my man think that he is always replaceable b/c I can take care of me. Also I clam up a lot. I dont handle anger or apologies well so a lot of times I will dismiss things to avoid conflict. Not always a good thing. I know these flaws contributed to the demise of my marriage. However I want to get married again eventually (to answer you SJ)

By 2CPTG©

January 8, 2008 2:24 PM | Link to this

Random thoughts by 2 Can:

which really did come first, the chicken, or the egg?

By Blow ME Beautifully a.k.a BLOW ME

January 8, 2008 2:24 PM | Link to this

Melo- Interesting…dont’ remember where I profess anything about sex….scroll back up. I DID say I was a scorpio. Never talked about my sexually skills on a blog..fall back a bit. I been dealing with the boys in a Man’s body. I got plenty of time to SNAG the one. Yeah it’s good men out there….But they damn sure aren’t FlOODING the block.

By Rell

January 8, 2008 2:26 PM | Link to this

@slim…agreed…love your post…at least i am being honest…i never paint a perfect picture of real…..i know that i am flawed

By Cemeeli

January 8, 2008 2:28 PM | Link to this

Slim…turn the mic on chica.

Sexyleggs come on out of the blog’s distillery and join us… did you see any snacks in there…Lol.

Wow you can close your mouth now…it’s okay…siblings do fight.

LadyJ are you the one that keeps eating all the snacks up?

2C Next random thought….

By BLAT!

January 8, 2008 2:28 PM | Link to this

What’s good in Blogsville?

Wow… I see we have some nice convo brewing today. Off Topic: Bella, I’m sorry ma, but yesterday’s topic was asinine in it’s very nature and I lost a teeny bit of respect for you for even posting it.

On Topic… While I do think it takes time to see a person’s true colors, I at least have a general idea of what purpose a woman is to fulfill in my life pretty early on. I know if she’s just to be a jump-off, a short term honey, or more of a long term shorty with possibilities. I know what i like and I know what i don’t like, and try to identify as much of it as possible sooner than later.

Regarding independence, I do believe there are some truly INDEPENDENT women out there, but when they are that way, they have trouble adjusting to being in a relationship, because it inherently involves bringing another into your circle and doing things with them in mind.

By Blow ME Beautifully a.k.a BLOW ME

January 8, 2008 2:30 PM | Link to this

RELL Fall back! Get some balls and maybe I’ll come cut em! lol!

By SlimOne

January 8, 2008 2:31 PM | Link to this

Rell Well I probably range from 115-125

Dreams I’d say accepting certain behaviors, not being assertive when needed, and thinking that my love would make him not want to mess around with some other chick.

By AmazonRed

January 8, 2008 2:33 PM | Link to this

Don’t know if my post went thru.

Rell - How did I “belittle” you. You seem extra sensitive today. I have not felt you on any thing you’ve said either. Not that it’s entirely uncommon.

No, I’m not going to answer my question. I don’t feel the need to justify who I am to anyone, let alone folks I don’t feel worthy of the response. All you need to know is that I’m happy with me and what I have to offer in life and in relationships. Good day.

By Cemeeli

January 8, 2008 2:34 PM | Link to this

which really did come first, the chicken, or the egg?

…are we still talking about orgasms?

Don’t anyone give 2C the mic no more…

By Lady J

January 8, 2008 2:34 PM | Link to this

cee cee you know how j do…smacking on snacks now…j

By The Truth

January 8, 2008 2:37 PM | Link to this

2C you got me lmao over here (224). WTF is going on dude?

Dan and melo 21-25 is a little aggressive in this sociey. That would apply if a dude was raised with a father who knew the game and passed it on. Not likely nowadays. I was still learning shyt in my late 20’s and solidified my program in my 30’s. You learn to be a man by being with a man and seeing how to handle different situations. Then you go and perfect your own program. Thats why this man bolting thing is so devastaing. It throws the whole ship off course.

Blow thats my job, to bring tears of joy to your eye. LOL

Sexy I just went grocery shopping and I need you over here cooking in my favorite apron, and nothing else. LOL

The Truth is now waitng for 2C’s next random thought. LOL

By AmazonRed

January 8, 2008 2:40 PM | Link to this

Dreams - To answer your question, here is one of my main reasons:

After seeing the example my dad provided in HIS household, I have a low tolerance for men who stumble when it comes to responsibility. I have to remember that at 25, I’m sure my dad made relationship mistakes, but I knew him as a man of 45, who had it all together. I expect a man to have it together and have a clear direction. Many men my age are just now coming into that stage. In addition, my dad never knew his own father, but never used that as an excuse.

By Rell

January 8, 2008 2:44 PM | Link to this

@ared…again, i am not sensitive…lol…you broads are extra with that ish..like you doing something to me by not cosigning my post…lol…i dont expect you to agree with me daily….i am find with you not feel me…lol.no love lost…good day to you as well

@blow…lol..cute comeback..

@slim….dayum….your wifey material…all single men according to the player blue book chart..slim is that one…stick ya bid in players

By Kym-Proud Steeler Nation Member since 1994

January 8, 2008 2:48 PM | Link to this

Slim Its a circle round and round. The only way the ride stops is if you jump off or are cut off. Sad thing is everyone wants the samething. NO Man I know of wants a woman bowing and scraping at his heels..unless he is some sadistic son of a bytch who gets off on that. I think the men are saying they want the strong woman just dont cut him off at the balls and hand them to him in a jar. But I think a few have a hard time expressing that without it coming off of women should bow and scrape at their male masters feet. I am not going to even go into that whole rib and bibilcal crap because frankly “the devil can cite scripture for his own purpose.” But I will say this. We are all God creatures just that those of us on the top of the food chain could take a few lessons from those we think are below us. Lessons in loyalty, family, strength and togetherness. I mean while the lion is the king of the jungle it is the lioness who hunts and gathers the food and teaches the young to do . I as a woman never looked at myself as the weaker sex because frankly I have the unique gift that the other sex doesnt have..and that is to nurture and give life. It takes two to make the life grow but it takes only one to bring that life to full term..doesnt make me weak makes me blessed.

By 2CPTG©

January 8, 2008 2:51 PM | Link to this

Random thought by 2 Can:

How can a drug sniffing dog smell cocaine, if cocaine has no smell?

By Jazzyone

January 8, 2008 2:53 PM | Link to this

DasV are you stillt rying to let that man know you mad at him for not telling you hes married…Why didn’t you just ask him when you met him if he was married??

Seriously move past it gee wiz you stressing a man that aint studin’ you you think you are the first or the last woman he will run up on while being married?? seriously….

By AmazonRed

January 8, 2008 2:53 PM | Link to this

Slim - Good post on your 2:19. I don’t think anyone will throw eggs. Who wouldn’t agree with that in the broad sense?

However, we’ve cut down to meat on this issue where personal thoughts and feelings come into play. Feel free to join us. LOL

By Blow ME Beautifully a.k.a BLOW ME

January 8, 2008 2:53 PM | Link to this

RELL

My comebacks are not cute…

How old are you as well?

You need to chill out with some of that….I am actually starting to take some of you comments as DISRESPECTFULLY….You need to take a blog time out…

By Blow ME Beautifully a.k.a BLOW ME

January 8, 2008 2:54 PM | Link to this

RELL

My comebacks are not cute…

How old are you as well?

You need to chill out with some of that….I am actually starting to take some of your comments as DISRESPECTFULLY….You need to take a blog time out…

By Lady J

January 8, 2008 2:54 PM | Link to this

ok cee cee of to cheer practice with the girls to burn it off…yall be easy!

By Dan

January 8, 2008 2:55 PM | Link to this

@ARed

Like Truth was saying, you have to see a man to understand how a man handles things. Think of it as a learning disability that one has to overcome, with a lot hard work you finally get to where other people are that didn’t have your disadvantage. And like your dad sometimes that disability makes you work harder and appreciate your accomplishments that much more.

At a certain point, a man (and it’s easier said than done) has to get beyond the “my daddy wasn’t here” acting out thing. We (30 and under) are probably the third generation to have to deal with it actively (with 2 or 3 more right behind us). So while empathy for the struggle is one thing, sympathy for the excuses is another.

By Cemeeli

January 8, 2008 2:58 PM | Link to this

@ Dr. Kym

Thanks for the wonderful compliment. To both the men and the women. I’ll take some of that…

By Chink

January 8, 2008 2:59 PM | Link to this

“the devil can cite scripture for his own purpose.”

I like that…

By Jazzyone

January 8, 2008 3:01 PM | Link to this

Slim ^5@2:19 post.

By Cemeeli

January 8, 2008 3:01 PM | Link to this

LadyJ Gooooo Meat! I heard that one for the first time and was like…yea…un-huh.

By Teresa

January 8, 2008 3:05 PM | Link to this

Are we doing a sex, age, and weight check

By melo

January 8, 2008 3:06 PM | Link to this

KYM because frankly I have the unique gift that the other sex doesnt have..and that is to nurture and give life u nailed it. Remeber when i said the same the other day. Just a thought,why is it we never hear about some of these complains about man..blah blah blah from the married females?Are they protecting what they got or what.I think the singles need to really learn from those on lock. Watch yaall think?? If u all need me to tutor i can do that but i will not come to class same day as my wife.And i’ll do my classes in summer only and at exotic Atlanta sites and pools.

By AmazonRed

January 8, 2008 3:07 PM | Link to this

Dan - In answering Dream’s question, it means I acknowledge that it was an issue that contributed to my failed relationships. Clearly, I’m aware of that stuff now and have adjusted accordingly.

But good post, I suppose.

By Willie Dynamite

January 8, 2008 3:09 PM | Link to this

Slim you hit the nail on the head in regards to human relations. Especially AA’s. We as a people seem so intent on pointing fingers at the opp sex and making sure we are always right. We fail to listen (in this case read) because we are busy formulating a response or gut punch in most cases.

2C That pure has no smell, dogs are trained to smell the cut.

By Rell

January 8, 2008 3:12 PM | Link to this

@blow me…i am 35..how old are you..Disrespectful, how are my comments disrespectful..these are my thoughts today..i am giving my honest opinion on things…it may stink but it is not fabricated to increase my blog points NOR i am fishing for and undercover hookup(like lo)…yea that is melo…she know..you know..its melo….lol

By DASv

January 8, 2008 3:13 PM | Link to this

JazzO yous a bit late aintcha..???…. that topic was dropped at like 10 this morning. go ahead and speed-blog to catch up.

By pisces08

January 8, 2008 3:16 PM | Link to this

ARed. ^5, holdin it down all day.

By Poppa Grande

January 8, 2008 3:21 PM | Link to this

Slimyou are so right. Your 2:19 post is so true. My experience was much more positive when hanging and just enjoy each other company was the goal. The wife and I didn’t quite feel each other at first. I thought she was may have been a bit short for me and she thought that I was a too young for her. (I am 6’8” and she is 5’2”- which is a 1.5 foot difference. I am 3 years younger than she.)

But, we did enjoy each other company. Ultimately, we quit worrying about things that the other could not do anything about. I get age any faster without her do the same and she wasn’t gonna grow inches all of a sudden in her late 20s. Positives far outweighed the negatives.

On another note, I tell plenty of my female friends and my wife’s female friends that there are plenty of good men out there. I tell them that they need to stop asking for a good man, and start asking for a good man for them. Just because some guy is a good man, doesn’t mean that he is a good man for you!!

Just as Uncle Russy says “Thanks for coming out. God bless. Good Night!!”

By Cemeeli

January 8, 2008 3:22 PM | Link to this

Auw naw!

…so melo at times your posts start out on point, but then by the time i read up to the end of your comment someone has to come & pull you out of The Grand Canyon.

…Cee dusting melo’s clothes off…

By Jazzyone

January 8, 2008 3:24 PM | Link to this

DasV..nah can’t catch up just dropping in while im wrking..but I didn’t see your answer to that though I saw a few responses..but I was just curious why didn’t you just ask him if he was married in the first place???

By melo

January 8, 2008 3:27 PM | Link to this

yea that is melo…she know..you know..its melo….lol Yep, Rell,BlowMe likes men who pay for good dinner, so ur azz cant afford her.Yu gangstazz wake up way too early to hit the streets,these women like tenderness in bed.

By AmazonRed

January 8, 2008 3:28 PM | Link to this

Poppa Grande - You are 6’8”? You have any single brothers? :-)

pisces - I see you’re updated for the new year! (08)

By Staceye

January 8, 2008 3:31 PM | Link to this

Rell @amazonred…your grandmothers day are long gone..because women back then knew how to KEEP A MAN..not dispose of him when he p* her off* No sir! the problem is our grannies had no other option than to deal with a man’s BS (cheating, beating, lying, etc) because the education and reseources for women that we have today were no available. But best believe they were miserable. Plenty of them wanted a way out but nothing but death was it. Now….we don;t have to deal with it. We can simply rpovide for ourselves and be happier than being mistreated by a man who only hears what half of the so-called vows that he wants…selective hearing is what I call it. You hear the “man is the head…but you turn the deaf ear to cherishing your wife and keeping only unto her..and oh yeah…love her as you love God! Hmmmm…funny how that tends to get lost in the machisomo crap that men sprew!

Melo just because I refuse to be treated like a second class citzen…does not mean that I am gay. Let’s get that straight. I have never been happier now that I have lost the emotional connection to men. If I want to date for fun…I can do so without getting all bloody into the dude! Treat him the way men like to treat women…like something to do just to pass the time.

Chink well put!

By DASv

January 8, 2008 3:34 PM | Link to this

oJazzOne why should i have to ask??! i wouldnt expect someone who is to be flexin wit me… but like i said earlia ‘i have a dream’. foolish me

By melo

January 8, 2008 3:34 PM | Link to this

so melo at times your posts start out on point thats an attraction u just trying to fend off to look good on da blog!

By SlimOne

January 8, 2008 3:34 PM | Link to this

@Rell

Slim slamming the gavel 3 times

I open the bidding at…hmmm $5, a trip to Ci Ci’s Pizza and a Dairy Queen Strawberry Sundae.

By Rell

January 8, 2008 3:39 PM | Link to this

@melo…gangsta…lol, not me homie…sooooooooo far from it. I cant afford her..is that suppose to stick me low…lol. You get a pass too..because your weak to me…you fishing for poo see but afraid to stick your neck out…when you try and they come down on you..you hide behind i am joking…your weak duke…so go back to gettin off to asian p orn…lol

By The Truth

January 8, 2008 3:39 PM | Link to this

slim I bid one bicycle tire and some old chuck taylors.

By Gina

January 8, 2008 3:42 PM | Link to this

why should you have to ask him? umm Because you want to know? SO you can make an informed decision? Are women really this clueless still, today? or are you that desperate for male attention?

By Rell

January 8, 2008 3:44 PM | Link to this

You guys are way off about me..but that is cool…keep your me in the box that is comfortable for you….lol

@slim….only 5 dollars..dayum…lol

By Cemeeli

January 8, 2008 3:45 PM | Link to this

Melo stop!…

By Blow ME Beautifully a.k.a BLOW ME

January 8, 2008 3:46 PM | Link to this

Rell Aren’t you a bit old to be acting so …..never mind. Stop being so brassy. Chill out…You need to be hookin up to take some of that unnecessary BASS outcha voice. You need to get some loving over there…ABOUT to bust a blood vessel. Calm down! LMFAO!!

By melo

January 8, 2008 3:46 PM | Link to this

been happier now that I have lost the emotional connection to men Can i buy u dinner,no emotions attached on ur part?

By Rell

January 8, 2008 3:48 PM | Link to this

@staceye…sounds like you have some first hand knowledge on that…because you have repeated that story on more than one post. On your dating choices or you deciding to take on the mannerisms of a man..does that include p** standing up…lol

By Wow

January 8, 2008 3:49 PM | Link to this

wow

By abc

January 8, 2008 3:50 PM | Link to this

And I thought I was one to go off-topic all the time. Back to the same ol’ thing again, looks like.

In Hamlet, the play-within-a-play’s king says “What to ourselves in passion we propose, the passion ending, doth the purpose lose”, and “for ‘tis a question left for us to prove, whether love lead fortune or else fortune love”.

When the female character tries to reassure him that she’s not just after getting him to off her husband, that she really digs him, the Queen in the audience comments, “Methinks she doth protest too much”. All of you protest way too much.

Chicks aren’t going to be satisfied with anything any man is or does, especially once the bloom is off the relationship. That’s the way chicks are. Chicks screw things up most of the time by either scheming for whatever it is they think they really want — it’s not as if they really know — or passing up good things in hopes of finding something materially better, and then still better, and then better still. Men maintain culpability by cheating or leaving when the feelings all go south, if there ever were any. Thus, nobody trusts anybody.

Real man, good woman, independence, role models, blah blah blah. What a bunch of hogwash! You either feel it or you don’t, you’re either for real or you aren’t, you’re either trustworthy or not, and what makes you be that way isn’t so formulaic that you can say it takes X amount of time to see it in another person, or that you seek a potential mate that reminds you of your parents.

By Rell

January 8, 2008 3:51 PM | Link to this

@gina..you are about to join me on the outside looking into the blog clique….trust me, the truth or honest post are not wanted in this spot..only the fluff…but yea i male attention is more valuable then money to some…attention is the ONLY currency you use when you want to get with a female now-a-days

By Wow

January 8, 2008 3:52 PM | Link to this

What’s good everyone….I didnt have time to get in on the topic today but it seams to be a good one…..so i will just cosign on what the women are saying! lol

By Poppa Grande

January 8, 2008 3:53 PM | Link to this

AR No brothers by blood. :) I am like Theo Huxtable: The only male. (He had four sisters & I have three) sorry!!

By melo

January 8, 2008 3:56 PM | Link to this

so go back to gettin off to asian p orn… u got a site u can recommend 4 me rell?

By SlimOne

January 8, 2008 3:57 PM | Link to this

Slim tries to catch herself from throwing that gavel at Truth.

Now what da fugg kind of wifey you think you gonna get with an old bicycle tire and a smelly shoe. Make that a Segway Scooter and I might not throw you out of this here auction.

Gavel bangs 4 times

Now back to the bidding…..Do i hear $25, a trip to see the empty whale shark tank at the aquarium, and a seal bottle of Tussy?

By limegpuppy

January 8, 2008 4:01 PM | Link to this

Kym - nice post.

This is truly a topic that will go on forever. Once everybody work on self, then come back to the card table with clean hands. The game will change, until then it’s a lost cause.

For everyone lookin for the right one. Continue to believe that they exist, and they will manifest themselves in the flesh. You won’t have to play silly games, and make crazy rules, or even have a motive. Good luck to all you singles.

Limeg now existing blogsville, heading out into the real world!

By Dan

January 8, 2008 4:02 PM | Link to this

@Slim

$6 and two sundaes

By AmazonRed

January 8, 2008 4:02 PM | Link to this

abc - While it is all hogwash, if we didn’t get into the nitty gritty this blog would be a ghost town. LOL Might as well share battle scars.

Poppa Grande - BOOOO. I hope you enjoy the neck pain bending down to kiss my soror is giving you! :-P

By Blow ME Beautifully a.k.a BLOW ME

January 8, 2008 4:02 PM | Link to this

Now back to the bidding…..Do i hear $25, a trip to see the empty whale shark tank at the aquarium, and a seal bottle of Tussy?

**LMFAO ROTFL @ slimone

Whatcha u know about that TUSSY?**

By 2CPTG©

January 8, 2008 4:04 PM | Link to this

Random thought by 2 Can:

If scientists can find dinosaur bones which lived millions of years ago, why can’t they find remnants of Noah’s Ark, which, puportedly is only thousands of years old?

By Teresa

January 8, 2008 4:05 PM | Link to this

@SlimOne..I see your $25

By The Truth

January 8, 2008 4:07 PM | Link to this

Slimmy I thought I may get away with a low bid, kinda sneak in. Ok, that didn’t work. How about some already opened shower gel, a dinner at golden corral and a can of hormel chili?

By AmazonRed

January 8, 2008 4:07 PM | Link to this

Please somebody find 2 Can a purpose. LOL

Cracking up at Slim and the empty whale shark tank and Tussy! Youse a fool.

By Rell

January 8, 2008 4:08 PM | Link to this

@blow me…trust me when i tell you that i am up to my eyeballs in the sex dept….that is not a problem..i know what the problem is??

By DASv

January 8, 2008 4:09 PM | Link to this

a twenty question interrogation shouldnt be necessary to find a decent man. and it would be 20 questions, cause iffin i have to ask that one then i got 19 more that i need to be straight on. please

iffin you step to me i am going to assume 1. you find me intriguing enough to find out more and 2. you are available 3. you are emotional, mentally, spiritually available to explore getting to know me better 4.you are drug and disease free

in this case my assumption was wrong. alrighty. that said… i cant for the life of me understand that was somehow my fault.

ppl talk non-judgmental, seeing the good in ppl, being open-minded and free-spirited but i am, and it aint what i thought it was and i vent about… i catch flack??! nukka pls

i like slims deal… we chat, we hang out, we vibe, we… whaeva we want with no guilt cause yous free, im free to do as we pls

By abc

January 8, 2008 4:10 PM | Link to this

2CPTG, Noah’s Arc was found years and years ago, it has a museum next to it and you can go visit it if you want to go to Turkey. They treat it as a Muslim shrine. It’s not on Mt. Ararat, but it’s real close to it.

By Teresa

January 8, 2008 4:11 PM | Link to this

@SlimOne I see your $25

By melo

January 8, 2008 4:12 PM | Link to this

Rell(35), u jealous!U cant fish asian porn coz ur mama will cuss u out.

By Rell

January 8, 2008 4:13 PM | Link to this

@slim - I HATE TUSSY…LOL..

@melo..yea i can, i like asain porn…i like porn period…so what type do you like….lol

By Cemeeli

January 8, 2008 4:14 PM | Link to this

2C what can we do with Noah’s Ark remains?

…this ain’t even my Blog Spot i saw this blog on MySpace…

By DASv

January 8, 2008 4:16 PM | Link to this

LOL

trust. 2 has a purpose. just today, 2CAN has the mic and is no doubt blazin…. i aint mad.

By 2CPTG©

January 8, 2008 4:18 PM | Link to this

ummm, A Red, these are my random thoughts, as they come to mind….

my purpose is to not purposely purport on a topic that has no purpose! (see my 9:52 post!)

By Staceye

January 8, 2008 4:20 PM | Link to this

Melo yes you can buy me dinner! LOL

Rell of course not….I do not have a p#nis! LOL

By 2CPTG©

January 8, 2008 4:22 PM | Link to this

I beg to differ, abc….but since you believe so, tell me, is it big enough to have held two of every kind of dinosaur?

By Teresa

January 8, 2008 4:22 PM | Link to this

Do all men generally like porn

By Poppa Grande

January 8, 2008 4:22 PM | Link to this

AR Well, I don’t have a problem with the spine. I just pick her up. she is tiny. I can curl her. lmao.. I almost threw her up in the air when carrying her over the threshold to our suite at the Georgian Terrance on our Wedding night…lmao. Scared the mess out of both of us. I thought that we may end up down the street at Crawford Long…lol We laugh about it now….but then…

By Blow ME Beautifully a.k.a BLOW ME

January 8, 2008 4:22 PM | Link to this

Rell What is the problem then? If you are head deep….must be pretty awful. Because you are a damn GRINCH today…

By Teresa

January 8, 2008 4:25 PM | Link to this

Why do men like to be called daddy in bed

By Rell

January 8, 2008 4:27 PM | Link to this

Alright folks….this is it….go ahead and point your flucking fingers an say there he is — THE BAD GUY, i am gone for the day…last time you will see a BAD GUY like this — okah!!!!!….lol

@melo…dude just stop…lol

By Kym-Proud Steeler Nation Member since 1994

January 8, 2008 4:32 PM | Link to this

Dedicated to those who play that role… Love Calls-Kem I’m sittin’ here thinkin’ about you tonight And all that you mean to me I used to think I would never fall in love again I guess I was wrong

When your heart was broken When your wounded pride was laid to rest, baby You’ll never open your heart to anyone else you said But you lied, I know you’re lyin’ to me

You see your mind might be made up, mmm But your heart has got it’s own plans There’s no one to blame for false pride, tellin’ lies, tryin’ to hide From feelin’ the pain, I know you don’t wanna feel it

There’s nowhere to hide when the love is callin’ your name, yeah From the dark, babe, nowhere to hide, baby There’s nowhere to hide, so let love have it’s way with your heart When love calls, love calls, love calls your name

It’s on my lips And I wish that you were still here To take me away with your kiss And take me away from all this crazy, crazy

‘Cause too many words have been spoken, mmm Too many lies have been told, baby You’ll never do it again you told yourself over and over and over You’re wrong, dead wrong, babe, yeah

There’s nowhere to hide, mmm, when love is callin’ your name In from the dark, baby, nowhere to run, girl There’s nowhere to hide, yeah, so let love have its way, girl, with your heart, babe Love calls, love calls

There’s nowhere to hide, yeah, when love calls your name

You fall apart, baby Nowhere to hide, nowhere to run when love is on its way, girl, to your heart, baby When love calls, love calls your name, babe

Love’s callin’ your name, hey, hey It’s callin’ out for, callin’ out for me, baby Love’s on its way, baby, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

I’m sittin’ here thinkin’ about you tonight And how you make me feel The sweetness of your touch The softness of your voice, mmm You make me wanna be a better man, baby And I wanna thank you for calling me into your life Into your arms, into your love

By Rell

January 8, 2008 4:32 PM | Link to this

@blow me…no problem i will be adjusted tommorrow…trust me on that

By SexyLeggs

January 8, 2008 4:33 PM | Link to this

Cemeeli, you know darn well I don’t do snacks.

Truth, give me directions and I’ll show you how to burn in more ways than one!

Whew I actually had to work these past 2 hours.

By melo

January 8, 2008 4:35 PM | Link to this

Do all men generally like porn yes.Some will replace u azz with it if u deprive them of ur puddy.Think kirk.

By AmazonRed

January 8, 2008 4:36 PM | Link to this

Ummm, 2 Can that was my non random thought. You need a purpose. ;-)

Pappa Grande - You went outside the (vertically blessed) family. The board will make a note in your file. We must preserve the vertically blessed at all costs. Too many ankle biters running around. However, I will give you points for love and the fact that she’s a Delta. LOL. Can’t hate on that!

By SlimOne

January 8, 2008 4:37 PM | Link to this

Dan Boo, you’ll have to up that $6. Teresa has offered $25…..wait a minute????? Stop the bid!

Teresa Would you approach the podium please?

Slim lightly asks her if she’s looking for a wife?

By The Truth

January 8, 2008 4:38 PM | Link to this

Slimmy I’d like to up my bid. 2 bags of Orville reddenbacher popcorn, a box of ramen noodles and the sweater my ex left here that I forgot to trash.

Teresa question 1. Yes Question 2. because women love saying it.

I wonder if we all sat down to talk face to face if a fight would break out.

By melo

January 8, 2008 4:43 PM | Link to this

Why do men like to be called daddy in bed(hate that), such women who do are pining for what they dont/didnt have,a regular man in their lives and an absent dad growing up. Such so called f******* dad is usually a one hit wonder/hook up.

By SexyLeggs

January 8, 2008 4:43 PM | Link to this

DasV, see that’s a big misconception on most women’s part that …3. you are emotional, mentally, spiritually available to explore getting to know me better 4.you are drug and disease free. Hell it’s the crazies and disease ridden ones that have the most nerve to step.

By SlimOne

January 8, 2008 4:45 PM | Link to this

TruthY I cannot accept a bid of opened shower gel. The CT is sensitive. lol But we might be able to work with Golden Corral….see me and Teresa in the break room asap!

By 2CPTG©

January 8, 2008 4:47 PM | Link to this

and why exactly, do I need a purpose, Amazon….tell me….

I was minding my own business, chillin, and here you come…..why not just ignore it? Really.

By abc

January 8, 2008 4:47 PM | Link to this

Dinosaurs were extinct by then. You don’t really want get into a discussion of archaeological vs. Biblical timeline here, do you? It’s a topic with which most folks have much difficulty reconciling. How long was a day before there was a planet to spin and a sun to reflect on it? Those days could have been billions of our years each, for all we know. God taking a handful of dust and creating Adam could be the equivalent of evolution.

Google Noah’s Arc and see what you find, it’s very interesting. I’d want to go see it if I thought I’d get treated as anything but an infidel.

By Poppa Grande

January 8, 2008 4:48 PM | Link to this

AR Thanks for the points!!..BTW, what did I win yesterday?! (you called me the winner..lol)

PG & the Missez would love another trip to Barbados. :)

By DASv

January 8, 2008 4:51 PM | Link to this

sexyLeggs cant a gurl dream though LOLROTF i feel what my other blog sista-gurls are sayin. but i hate playin bad cop from the first, before good cop can do her thang!

By AmazonRed

January 8, 2008 4:54 PM | Link to this

AIDS is the #1 killer of black women ages 25-34.

Nearly 50% of blacks have genital herpes but 90% of em don’t know it.

I don’t assume anyone is disease free anymore. Until you see some physical test results, I will assume you don’t really know your status!

By Teresa

January 8, 2008 4:55 PM | Link to this

@SlimOne…No

By The Truth

January 8, 2008 4:57 PM | Link to this

Slimmy my final offer, golden corral, a day cleaning out your car and I’ll dump your trash. But you have 2 throw Teresa in the deal too.

Sexy I know you would. LOL

Did Rell just go Scarface on us? LOL I like that scene.

By SexyLeggs

January 8, 2008 4:57 PM | Link to this

Good night everyone….tell someone you love them. It will put a smile on their heart!

By 2CPTG©

January 8, 2008 4:57 PM | Link to this

abc, again, I respectfully disagree, but due to time constraints, can’t shoot holes in your theory; shoot, I keep saying, invite some folks over, we can sit in the theatre and debate all day long!!!!

y’all have a good one…..

By AmazonRed

January 8, 2008 5:00 PM | Link to this

Good grief 2 Can IT WAS A JOKE.

Pappa G - You win my good graces for this week. LOL!

By For Real

January 8, 2008 5:04 PM | Link to this

Slim I bid 25 bag full of penny oatmeal cookies (crunched up), two big azz cups of milk, 1 roll of TP, 2 cans of that air freshner with the Indian on it, a box of jacks, a Kenny Fiddie Cent piece and a box of Boston Bake Beans.

By AmazonRed

January 8, 2008 5:19 PM | Link to this

For Real - You are the winning bidder. Slipping in at the last second. I hope you and Slim are very happy with each other.

By Shanell

January 9, 2008 11:40 AM | Link to this

I had “the talk” with a guy I’ve been seeing since November. The end result of the talk is that we are officially boyfriend/girlfriend and exclusive and blah blah blah. Don’t get me wrong, this is great…but I like having back-up plans, you see. I have another guy I’ve been seeing since two weeks after I met the fellow I spoke with today, and I’m casually dating another guy who I’m just getting to know. I’m also scheduled to go on a date next week with a really great guy who is interested in me…Busy, huh?

I want a serious, longterm relationship, but I don’t want any one guy to be able to hold me to ransom. So, at any given time, I’m cultivating a few potentials so that I have the upper hand on all these dispensable mofos…bwahahaha…

Anyway, is it cheating to keep cultivating my other potentials? I’m starting to feel as if the only true commitment is a marital one, and I don’t see a ring on my finger…