AJC.com > Living > Blog > Archives > 2007 > November > 07 > Entry

Old School Dating

The other day I was thinking about all the cool things about dating in our post-modern, post-feminist society. Then I wondered what it would be like to date back in the day. You know that good old-fashioned courting that our parents and grandparents did.

They had formals, debutante balls, parlor and/or porch visits, and general courting when they were single. My dad scooped my mom straight out of high school and out-romanced some fellow that was courting my mom. He didn’t use money, flashy cars, or pricey restaurants - just his charm.

How cool would it be if we had some of the old fashioned dating?

What old school dating would you like to see make a comeback?

Do you think that you could ever make it happen in your present day dating life?

Modern romance vs old fashioned romance - which one works best?

Permalink | Comments (380) | Post your comment | Categories: Dating

Comments

By Beautiful

November 7, 2007 8:25 AM | Link to this

Good morning! this morning on XM radio i heard i’ll do anything for you by denroy morgan and r u lonely for me by rude boys, omg! now that’s music!

By lady j

November 7, 2007 8:32 AM | Link to this

Morning…As young as I am I do prefer to be wooed!!!

By 2CPTG©

November 7, 2007 8:34 AM | Link to this

Morning….

I love everything old school! From the music to the culture…..if you stay true to who you are, and what you represent, and believe in, then it ain’t gotta comeback, cause it never left! Take the suckas out of the game, the cats who lead with their wallets, and let that old school charm, wit, and wisdom take over, then the true essence of dating will come back….methinks, anyway.

By Beautiful

November 7, 2007 8:36 AM | Link to this

the old school dating i would love to see come back is not having sex so soon and waiting until marriage to have sex, but again there are drawbacks to that. if a person waits and the sex is wack, then what?

By lady j

November 7, 2007 8:42 AM | Link to this

@Beautiful…I love XM Suite 62!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOVE IT!!!!! Listen to it now as I blog!!!:)

By DeMetriix

November 7, 2007 8:42 AM | Link to this

I’d really like to see men not be afriad to show their true feelings. seems to me back then if they liked you they were not afraid to show it.

By Beautiful

November 7, 2007 8:51 AM | Link to this

lady j i can’t live without XM. i have it in my car and bedroom. they play music that make you say “awww shyt!!!”. have you reminiscing like a mug.

By SlimOne

November 7, 2007 8:52 AM | Link to this

Morning What I liked about old school dating is that it seemed somebodies mama could always give you a reference about that particular gentleman. Family was still a large part of the courting process.

By Cemeeli

November 7, 2007 8:53 AM | Link to this

Good morning Room

Cozy warm cheese grits, turkey sausage, variety of oatmeal flavs, fresh fruit, biscuits, scrambled eggs and hot cocoa w/big ole fat over the top marshmallows and juices for all this crisp morning. Have at it folks.

On topic: What old school dating would you like to see make a comeback? Ole school 70’s house parties!!! The kind like when my mamma and dad hooked up. My dad (coolcat) requesting several Al Green cuts from the DJ for my mamma and falling in love that night. Courting in the living room. Dinner dates at the house so that the family meets your guy and get to know him too. Everybody having fun at backyard cookouts, family dinners, block parties….wow i can go on and on. I wish i could have been a 70’s chic.

By QC

November 7, 2007 8:57 AM | Link to this

Morning! I agree with 2cptg i am an old school Queen i truly love it! I don’t think old school dating has left cause everyone has their oly style of dating…as for modern/old fashion romance i prefer a little of both ;) i hope you all have a great day!

By Rell.com

November 7, 2007 8:57 AM | Link to this

@DeMetriix, black men back then were uplifted and respect by the women…now-a-days…er uhhh..not

@2C…cosign!!!

@Beautifu…SEX!!!, yea knew that would not take long…trust back in the day they were sexing like crazy..how did you get here…lol

yea lets return to old school shall we..like a man getting a hot meal for a date, yes back then the ladies would inviter there men friend over and COOK…seen it with my own eyes…would have all his favorites at the house..yea lets make that come back…ya know like the old saying goes..the way to a mans heart is thru is stomach..feel me

ask one of these ladies now to cook for you..and see what you get, but they quick to claim old fashion….then get your azz in the kitchen and burn..no microwave….lol

this should get good today

By Jazzyone

November 7, 2007 8:58 AM | Link to this

Morning ya! Charm??oh yes deffinite panty dropper…yeah it is pretty enchanting the way my parents met and have carried on a great love for over 40 yrs.

If we could go back in time heyal Id have 7 sons running around, barefoot , pregnant again, making biscuts for my man and HAPPY bout it LOL….

Holla ya!.im chillin today kicked back working listening to XM streamed..Bethoveen….I’ll be kicking Biggie classics by 11:30 I see its just that kinda day up in the task camp called and office today…peace…

By Latina_in_30004

November 7, 2007 8:58 AM | Link to this

Good morning!!! I would like old school dating to come back because I am definitely old school. Oh wait, maybe I’m just old, LOL.

I love men who are charming, thoughtful and romantic. Please bring back chivalry, honesty and integrity - both men and women should be more interested in the essence of the other person instead of their worldly possessions or appearances. Bring back men who give flowers, slow dancing under the stars and romantic dinners at candlelight. Sigh

By Mo (now known as Moeisha)

November 7, 2007 9:01 AM | Link to this

Morning Ya’ll!!

XM Radio, Suite 62 is a must-have!! I love it as well ya’ll! You can never go wrong on a saturday just turning that on all day! LOL

On topic I would love for old school house parties to comeback! And Cemeeli I agree with you, cookouts, family dinners, family outings, block parties…all of that would be great. I like to think of it as reminiscent of high school in a way.

I hate that I missed yesterday, massah had a sistah working!!

By lady j

November 7, 2007 9:02 AM | Link to this

@Beautiful, i just realize through AOL I can listen to it and I am loveing it…Love the old school mix with new slow R&B!!! Love it!!! I have quirks with my dad but I appreciate him loving muxsic and having it in our houseold back then bc I really appreciate it now!!! Lyrics are powerful!!!

Truth American Ganster scared the hell out me and I dont like Denzel in that role!!!! LOL

By Rell.com

November 7, 2007 9:04 AM | Link to this

I love men who are charming, thoughtful and romantic. Please bring back chivalry, honesty and integrity - both men and women should be more interested in the essence of the other person instead of their worldly possessions or appearances. Bring back men who give flowers, slow dancing under the stars and romantic dinners at candlelight. Sigh

^^^…funny thing is that it never left….it is just if you lead with the romance then you will fall into the friend zone or be labelled the nice guy….all the while sterling is beating a hole in her azz and eating her leftovers while she washes up….lol

By Dan

November 7, 2007 9:09 AM | Link to this

It’s funny,

Some women say that they want the “old school dating” back. That involves getting to know a person, taking time to learn a person, and genuinely be interested.

It’s not about money, not about “quality time”, becuase back then even the rotary phone call was “quality time”.

It was when a man could hold a woman without her flinching, when she might be courted by other men, but knew who she wanted.

Old school dating required a lot more commitment in dating, that some of us don’t have in marriage.

By Jazzyone

November 7, 2007 9:09 AM | Link to this

@Rell Why dont’ you try uplifting a woman sometimes and maybe she will uplift you. You act like thats automatic give respect you get it period… heyal..i’m tired of hearing (from you)how black women are just so bad to black men, like we have two heads and ya had nothing to do with it….stfu with that already…

By Rell.com

November 7, 2007 9:09 AM | Link to this

since you on songs - smooth mackin right here

Ready for the World - Tonight

It’s getting late, while are you still here, girl Have you made up your mind, you wanna make love tonight I want you to hold me, I want to be for real, girl Please tonight

Don’t want you to go ‘cause I don’t feel like bein’ lonely, no Not tonight, honey, not tonight You’re so scared ‘cause I can feel your heartbeat It’s so fast

Oh…oh…oh…oh… Girl, tonight Oh…oh…oh…oh… Girl, tonight

You’re probably thinking you’re gonna be a woman After all of this Let me tell you, you’re more woman than I ever seen Girl, tonight

I want your lips, I even want your tongue, love Come give it to me, come give it to me Take your time, but don’t you take too long, girl Please tonight

Oh…oh…oh…oh… Girl, tonight Oh…oh…oh…oh…ooh… Tonight

You’re so wet, you can barely wait, girl But see it’s alright, honey, it’s alright It’s so dark, but I don’t even care, girl I know where to go, I know what to do

You’re the heart and I am the arrow, girl Let me shoot you, uh

Don’t you worry ‘bout a damn thing, girl, no

By lady j

November 7, 2007 9:13 AM | Link to this

Hey MO!!! Happy Hump Day!!!

Rell keep it coming!!! LOL

By E

November 7, 2007 9:15 AM | Link to this

Old School dating huh? I’m cool with the dating scene today. I like keeping things casual and to me it seems if you were “courting” someone in those days you were one step from trying to marry that person. I think some things will always remain basic, good manners never go out of style. Opening doors, pulling out chairs and the man paying for the dates will always be current. All those other things that were mentioned such as debutante balls etc..still exist but are a result of regional traditions.

By Jazzyone

November 7, 2007 9:15 AM | Link to this

Today you sounds as bitter as Me2 did yesta’deh I know we all go thru stuff but come on….with that hate for the opposite sex lets name you He hate me 2..heyal…Im sorry but you started that negative shyt ealry this morning about women..gee wiz…

By AmazonRed

November 7, 2007 9:18 AM | Link to this

I’d still give the nod to modern dating because you have more choice. Old school was good back then if everyone fit into the same dating pattern, which is why it didn’t work.

That being said, I miss the old school dating trait of taking your time, having to past muster with mom and dad etc. That could still happen today if you wanted to, but most men would think you’re a little looney.

By Rell.com

November 7, 2007 9:18 AM | Link to this

@Jazzy….lol, is that right…so we back to this again…and i thought we were done…well yes i will stfu..thank you again…lol, come harder next time please….lol..it will take more than that to get me off my square honey..k…and you of all people should know that…LMAO..stfu…i will do that… but black men are not disrespected or emasculated….lol, thanks again Jazzy…lol

By Cemeeli

November 7, 2007 9:21 AM | Link to this

@ Rell i feel you on the cooking. My, my, my when my mom cooked/cook it’s like it brought out the best in my dad…Thank you mamma for teaching me.

By lady j

November 7, 2007 9:23 AM | Link to this

rell you funny but a lil truth to the nice guy theory…lol

By 2CPTG©

November 7, 2007 9:26 AM | Link to this

now I’m think of that old school jam by Betty Wright….“when folks think you and your man going thru a lil sum’in they cook up a lil food and throw a get together…..No pain, No gain”*……..ahhhhh, the days!!!

By SexyCool

November 7, 2007 9:31 AM | Link to this

give me a nice mix of the best of the old and the new…i CAN dream for a perfect world, can’t i?

By Cemeeli

November 7, 2007 9:32 AM | Link to this

Hey MO. That’s what’s up. To bad i can only get to hear the stories from 70’s romance. huuummmm…

And lady j you really like old school and did not like Denzel in the American Gangster movie?

By The Truth

November 7, 2007 9:33 AM | Link to this

Morning blogsville.

Rell hey my friend, you’ve been sounding a little tense in your posts on the ladies lately. Something you wanna talk about? LOL

On topic: Old school was cool but today is as good as it will ever be. Today you have the freedom to do old or new school, your choice. Then you only had old school. Same principles still apply. Lead with your wallet and you buy puddy. Put in some real work and you get a womans heart. With the heart comes puddy, food, shoulder massages, the whole 9 yards.

Its cool also that you can grab a chick now and take her straight back old school. Get her off the treadmill and show her what quality feels like. That chick is gonna ride with you till the wheels come off. Now she can turn around and has ways to show you how much she appreciates. She can take you out, cook, set it out for you too.

This is as good as it gets. Monday a beautiful friend took me to my favorite spot for lunch and today another friend will hit the movie and lunch with me. Dam the 70’s (except for the music), today is it. LOL

Good morning to the beautiful ladies of blogsville. Shortly you will feel a warm hand on your rear. Don’t flinch and don’t fight it, its just The Truth saying hi.

By lady j

November 7, 2007 9:33 AM | Link to this

lol 2…

By Rell.com

November 7, 2007 9:34 AM | Link to this

this goes out to Jazzy…lol….after i stfu…lol

Prince - Do Me

Here we are in this big old empty room, staring each other down U want me just as much as I want U, let’s stop fooling around Take me baby… kiss me all over… play with my love Bring out what’s been in me for far too long Baby, u know that’s all I’ve been dreaming of Do Me Baby, like u never done before Give it to me till I just can’t take no more Do Me Baby, like u never done before I want u now, I just can’t wait no more, can’t wait…

Here we are looking for a reason for u to lay me down For a love like ours is never out of season, so baby please stop teasing me what ya do, I can never love no other, u’re the best I ever had Whenever we’re not close to one another, I just want u so bad

So Do Me Baby, like u never done before Give it to me till I just can’t take no more C’mon, Do Me Baby, like u never done before I want u now, I just can’t wait no more

I said ooo…ooo…oooo…ooooooo Do Me Baby, Do Me Baby, give it to me Do Me Baby, I want u now Do Me Baby, give it to me Do Me Baby, Do Me baby, don’t wanna do it all alone I want your love. Do Me Baby, give it to me Do Me Baby, This feeling is too strong, make me wait 2 long, I want u now

You’re leaving me no choice OK, what are u gonna do…u just gonna sit there and watch? alright… are u sure u don’t wanna close your eyes? …well, isn’t it supposed to take a long time? I’m not gonna stop till the war is over… Help me! there…ok…ok I’m so cold….just hold me

By SexyLeggs

November 7, 2007 9:37 AM | Link to this

I would love to see old school dating make a comeback. I don’t think it’s really gone, just a little buried. It is nice to be wooed, courted and partake in some of the more simpler forms of dating, e.g., simple walks, long conversation. Like Jill-Scott’s song says….let’s take a walk, around the park, after dark….

Rell this is definitely ME - yea lets return to old school shall we..like a man getting a hot meal for a date, yes back then the ladies would inviter there men friend over and COOK Going out isn’t always necessary. A nice meal, great conversation, perhaps a good movie at home is a wonderful date.

Also, there’s nothing like a good ole house party w/you and your Boo. Wait, boo isn’t old school…LOL…w/you and your main squeeze!

By Rell.com

November 7, 2007 9:37 AM | Link to this

Bunny DeBarge - A Dream

Last night I dreamed That you were here with me And we were in each others arms It was oh so heavenly You held me close to you And whispered in my ear “Let’s build a life together Share love beyond compare”

As we danced to the melody We had so much to share (then the music stopped) In a flash I was all alone (it was just a dream) Haunting me once again

Chorus: A dream, of simple fantasy That I, wished was reality That you’d, come knocking at my door And we’d, relive this dream once more

The day you left You said you would return Just when you wouldn’t promise Said you needed time alone You said you loved me and Someday our love could be I couldn’t understand it I thought we were both happy

As we danced to the melody We had so much to share (then the music stopped) In a flash I was all alone (it was just a dream) Haunting me once again

(Chorus 2x)

Hold me Love me With all your heart

Ohh come back Please make my dream come true for me I need so much for you to see I need you to love me once again

By Foots

November 7, 2007 9:38 AM | Link to this

Rell it is just if you lead with the romance then you will fall into the friend zone or be labelled the nice guy

Nah, those were the guys I was the most crazy about. Some romantic men end up in the friend zone because they didn’t take the time to find out whether the woman was interested in them in the first place. Where there is attraction and opportunity between two people, the friend zone doesn’t exist.

What old school dating would you like to see make a comeback?

I’d say, taking your time getting to know someone. I’m tired of some men today having the “if I ain’t got in her draws in two weeks, I’m out” mentality. Dan is right, it does require more commitment to date old-fashioned, because you’re putting more of your time and yourself into seeing if something can develop. Your main focus is on that person.

I do miss the days when you could tell what kind of person a man/woman was by knowing which family they came from. You almost knew what you were getting before you got it. Nowadays, nearly everyone you meet is from somewhere else and nobody knows them but you.

Do you think that you could ever make it happen in your present day dating life?

I tend to gravitate towards men with a good mix of old-school and new-school values. Old-school as in being chivalrous, hard-working, patient and kind….new-school as in being able to support me in my endeavors as I support him.

By lady j

November 7, 2007 9:39 AM | Link to this

Cemeeli dont like him playing bad men roles…it creeps me out!!! LOL

By Cemeeli

November 7, 2007 9:44 AM | Link to this

Hey Truth sweetie.

Gotta get at cha bout them 70’s..since you say dayum them. How about with today’s flamboyant he/she, she/he -s in this here ‘new school’. Oh and on the DL folks so prevelent now. I ain’t knocking the ‘new’ (cause i’m living it). But if i could prefer… Yea, i would prefer 70’s.

I love you too. Kekekeke…

By lady j

November 7, 2007 9:45 AM | Link to this

Training Day was rough for me to! Great Movies though!!! Old school and street is two different concepts to me…lol

By Rell.com

November 7, 2007 9:46 AM | Link to this

@truth….nothing to report here homie..i am cool, but i see my radical stance may paint me as a hater or narrowmind…as told to me by someone i RESPECT dearly….so to not make myself or my views seem like BULL ISH..i will just chill and only serve the FLUFF from now on…note - i am not that foolish to believe that all black women disrespect black men, i know there are some or let me say a majority of the over 35 crowd that are ride or die.but i have been only adding my view to make some take note…like let me see if i do that….in no way shape or form was it meant to ruffle feathers…thats….but dont worry from now on..while i blog here…i am KISSING ARSE….ONE LOVE!!

By Mo (now known as Moeisha)

November 7, 2007 9:49 AM | Link to this

Truth kisses to you babe! How are you?

Cemeeli as a 70’s baby, I agree with you! Too bad we can only hear stories about that kind of romance! But I will take my old school music and whatnot in the meantime!

Lady J What’s up Chica!!

RELL Keep it up!!

By Beautiful

November 7, 2007 9:49 AM | Link to this

Bunny DeBarge - A Dream, now that’s a panty dropper!!! lol.

By aaa

November 7, 2007 9:50 AM | Link to this

Is Rell Gay? Cant tell if man or woman

By aaa

November 7, 2007 9:53 AM | Link to this

Women couldnt deal with dating back in the day, Men didnt have nice cars or money. LOL

By Cemeeli

November 7, 2007 9:57 AM | Link to this

ladyj it’s cool…you prefer Denzel in more of a ‘role model’ role. I see, i see where you are.

By 2CPTG©

November 7, 2007 9:57 AM | Link to this

Rell, you go soft playboy, I’mma call you out! I feel you on taking to heart some ism from true fam, but the rest……kinfolk, you know!

By Rell.com

November 7, 2007 9:58 AM | Link to this

Prom song for someone….lol

Luther - Only for one Night…R.I.P

LET ME HOLD YOU TIGHT IF ONLY FOR ONE NIGHT LET ME KEEP YOU NEAR TO EASE AWAY YOUR FEAR IT WOULD BE SO NICE IF ONLY FOR ONE NIGHT

I WON’T TELL A SOUL NO ONE HAS TO KNOW IF YOU WANT TO BE TOTALLY DISCREET I’LL BE AT YOUR SIDE IF ONLY FOR ONE NIGHT

YOUR EYES SAY THINGS I NEVER HEAR FROM YOU AND MY KNEES ARE SHAKIN TOO BUT I’M WILLIN TO GO THRU I MUST BE CRAZY STANDIN IN THIS PLACE BUT I’M FEELING NO DISGRACE

FOR ASKING……

LET ME HOLD YOU TIGHT IF ONLY FOR ONE NIGHT LET ME KEEP YOU NEAR TO EASE AWAY YOUR FEAR IT WOULD BE SO NICE IF ONLY FOR ONE NIGHT

I TELL YOU WHAT I NEED IS ONE NIGHT, ONE NIGHT OH (AND OH, OH) WHAT I NEED IS ONE NIGHT, ONE NIGHT OF YOUR LOVE, OF YOU LOVE, OF YOUR LOVIN OOH I’M ASKING…

LET ME TAKE YOU HOME TO KEEP YOU SAFE AND WARM TILL THE EARLY DAWN WARMS UP TO THE SUN IT WOULD BE SO NICE IF ONLY FOR ONE NIGHT

IF ONLY FOR ONE NIGHT IF ONLY FOR ONE NIGHT iF ONLY FOR ONE NIGHT, NIGHT, NIGHT, YEAH ONE NIGHT IF ONLY FOR ONE………NIGHT

By AmazonRed 2.0

November 7, 2007 9:59 AM | Link to this

I hope everyone ignores the trolls today.

By Rell.com

November 7, 2007 10:03 AM | Link to this

@white trash…if you qualified i would say come find out for yourself..but since in this caste systems undesirables do not qualify i would have to say better luck next time….now shut up talking to me bench!!!

By Jazzyone

November 7, 2007 10:04 AM | Link to this

@Rell* dayum you got me cracking with that song..up…I love you baybeh..im sorry…I see your points as well…One night yeah seems I need one of those obviously hunh..this celibacy (sp) s** is over rated…..LMAOFF…

By Dan

November 7, 2007 10:04 AM | Link to this

Old School Dating

Anything by Luther (RIP!) Can I take you out tonight? A house is not a home

Whatever he sang on a grainy tape (or record wow I’m old) and just sitting on the couch kissing.

Anyone remember kissing til your lips were swole? What happened to that? That’s what I miss.

By 2CPTG©

November 7, 2007 10:05 AM | Link to this

A Red….I know right…..must be a miserable soul to start the morning off with negative, dumb shyt!

By AmazonRed

November 7, 2007 10:07 AM | Link to this

Lots to do the one weekend I’m in town 11/17.

Play Date? Soul Bowl Lounge? Omegas Founders Day Parties? Nupe party?

Too many choices!

By Rell.com

November 7, 2007 10:07 AM | Link to this

@2c, not going soft homie…but for me i can take it..accept and analyze my behavior..maybe just maybe..i am coming off that way..so i will chill…i am not mad or tender about it…but i can do that..feel me…me and that women will ALWAYS be cool..no matter what..feel me…that is to the grave

By lady j

November 7, 2007 10:09 AM | Link to this

We only just begun the romance is not over!!!!!

My ex husband told me the book to American Ganster is much better…gots to find it…lol

By The Truth

November 7, 2007 10:09 AM | Link to this

Ladyj thats whats so cool about the dude. He makes you forget he’s Denzel and he becomes that charchter. Sorry you didn’t like it. I loved it.

Simi she/she’s he/she’s, dl, and all the other groups aren’t a part of my world. They’re free to do their thang but The Truth doesn’t do balls. Actually all these extremes make quality that much more apparent. Notwithstanding For Reals explaination of quality.

REFLECTION and slightly off topic: When I was about 11 or 12 I saw these 2 neighborhood dudes fight. Billy Markham and Poppa (Named because at 16 he already had 2 kids). Those 2 dudes walked up to each other, looked each other in the eyes and went at it. They were throwing knuckles something fierce ( this is from the viewpoint of a 11/12 year old). When it was over they looked each other in the eye and walked away. Those 2 cats had all the women even before the fight. Not because of their ability to fight but because of the heart these dudes had. Alot of dudes aren’t cut like that nowadays. They come from behind you and steal you. Even in the pen alot of dudes stole cats from behind. My point is heart is heart. The same dude that would steal a dude from behind will walk on his responsibilties. A stand up dude is gonna stand rain or shine. REFLECTION OVER. LOL

By Cemeeli

November 7, 2007 10:10 AM | Link to this

LOL @ Dan - kissing til your lips were swole? Uumm, no i’ve never got the swole lips from kissing.

By AmazonRed 2.0

November 7, 2007 10:11 AM | Link to this

I’m with you Dan, Luther happens to be my all time favorite artist!!!

By 2CPTG©

November 7, 2007 10:11 AM | Link to this

Dan…..what you know ‘bout that tongue kissing…..in FL, we used to say, “Did you pull her tongue?”

By Atlanta Pearl Girl

November 7, 2007 10:13 AM | Link to this

I simply LOVE the idea of old school dating. To be truthful….it’s traditions like the above that are romantic and really give your kids great memories…….

It’s great for adults too!

Atlanta Pearl Girl

By lady j

November 7, 2007 10:14 AM | Link to this

Truth the movie was GREAT!!!!! I am going to look at the series tonight after listening to the TJMS and the writer who talked!!! I am interesting in learning more about Frsnk Lucas!!!! Dezel was great!!! As ALWAYS!!!

By Cemeeli

November 7, 2007 10:15 AM | Link to this

Hey Truth OF COURSE!! You think your Simi is left field with it. NO. I’m just bring up what wasn’t so LIVE back then. That crap is sickening to say the least.

By Rell.com

November 7, 2007 10:16 AM | Link to this

@dan..kissing until your lips were swole..that was called mono…lol, but yeah good times until you woke up in the morning with sore balls…lol

@Jazzy…luv you as well lady..its good, today is my day to be checked..i stand corrected today!

Boy i caugt alot of swole lips to this

Quincy Jones- Secret Garden

Intro) Tell me your secret I don’t just want to know about any secret of yours… Because tonight I want you to learn all about the secrets In your garden

(Verse 1) I wanna read your mind, know you deepest feelings I wanna make it right for you Baby, show me Let me share the mystery, oh… Listen to your heart tonight Make it alright, yeah, yeah, yeah

(Verse 2) I know a melody that we could sing together I?ve got the secret key to you, baby Let?s make music Harmonizin? ecstasy Come on, sing it to me

(Bridge) Here in the garden Where temptation feels so right Passion can make you fall for what you feel In the garden We can make it come alive Every night, oh, woman Your secret garden, hoo…, hoo…, hoo…, hoo…

(Verse 3) I need to be with you, let me lay beside you Do what you want me too all night Gonna hold you Ooh, baby, can I touch you there I can keep you satisfied, baby Ooh, ooh-wee, ooh-wee, baby Please, baby, oh, darlin?

(Verse 4) I?ll take good care of you That?s what a man is supposed to do And I?ll be there for you all the time Let your hair down Let me get you in the mood Come on, take me, take me with you

(Bridge) Into the garden Where temptation feels so right Passion can make you fall for what you feel In the garden We can make it come alive Every night, oh, woman Here in the garden

(Bridge) And I never wanted anyone I never wanted anyone as much as I, as much as I want you I want you to show me, I want you to tell me how you feel All the secrets

(Outro) If you think I am gonna take care of you If you think I have got what you need Sho? you right

If you think I am gonna be good to you If you think I like what you do Sho? you right

If you think I am gonna take care of you If you think I have got what you need Sho? you right

If you think I am gonna be good to you If you think I like what you do Sho? you right

If you think I am gonna take care of you If you think I have got what you need Sho? you right

If you think I am gonna be good to you If you think I like what you do Sho? you right

If you think I am gonna take care of you If you think I have got what you need Sho? you right If you think I am gonna be good to you…

By lady j

November 7, 2007 10:17 AM | Link to this

ok Cemeeli….

ARED why my cripple self going try to make two of those functions!!!!!! lol I get a walking cast today and I am going to hit the streets!!! LOL

By abc

November 7, 2007 10:21 AM | Link to this

It seems to me that most of what yall are referring to as ‘old school’ has simply to do with being real and sincere, rather than running some game to get laid and take advantage of the other person, male or female. If there is an ‘old school’ of dating (and I rather doubt there is) it has not to do with being genuine. If there is a ‘new school’ of dating, my impression is that it mostly has to do with superficiality.

By Weather Man

November 7, 2007 10:23 AM | Link to this

I LIKE TURTLES

By China Doll

November 7, 2007 10:23 AM | Link to this

Hello Gang, it’s been awhile. I just wanted to chime in about ole school dating.

I think that you still can have it in 2007. It’s all about who you are and who you attract. Now, you may have go through a few leisure suits, Fedora’s w/feathers, Stacy Adams and several visits to the Crow’s Nestto get it, but it’s still out there. LOL

By Weather Man

November 7, 2007 10:23 AM | Link to this

I LIKE TURTLES

By The Truth

November 7, 2007 10:24 AM | Link to this

Rell I don’t want you to hold your tongue. You speak the truth but you and I know a chick can only dispespect you if you let her. I don’t see you taking it that way so I assume your statements are genralizations. Cool enugh dude.

AAA you gotta come better than that. I’m still waiting on some background info on you. Contrary to news reports all black men aren’t gay and thinking so makes you a lame.

OK, ev1 with comcast try channel 907, Smooth R&B. Commercial free and the best music I’ve ever heard. Plus I have Sirius and don’t like the commercials. LOL

By Cemeeli

November 7, 2007 10:27 AM | Link to this

Truth/ladyj

That movie is going in my collection as SOON as the DVD is released. YEA the real one. Lol….

By Jewel

November 7, 2007 10:29 AM | Link to this

Good morning Everyone!

Do you think that you could ever make it happen in your present day dating life? This is an easy answer for me today, since I am in the over 40 crowd. I never expected less for myself simply because the men I encountered had changed. I still expect honesty, integrity, respect, fidelity…for a man to make love to my mind. Fortunately, my SO and I are not 100% tainted by our past relationships. Therefore, we do not feel we have to compromise who we are to get what we want in a relationship. I think we both agree that what we have now is what we have always wanted. Not to say that we have a perfect, blissful relationship 24/7 but rather, we are willing to give and take what is necessary to make it work.

Modern romance vs old fashioned romance - which one works best? Give me old-fashioned romance any day! People had a different set of values and morals during that time. Society and the family structure have changed. With all the rotations and dating rules today, isn’t “modern romance” an oxymoron of sorts? Is it common practice to truly romance? Men and women are capable of bedding several people at one time while they search for “the one.” Hmmmph. Men think that if a woman expects him to pay for their outing, she is a gold digger. Double Hmmmph The games, lies, insecurities and unrealistic expectations cloud the dating scene, in my humble opinion.

What old school dating would you like to see make a comeback? The honor of being a virgin when you get married.

By Dan

November 7, 2007 10:32 AM | Link to this

Old School Dating

Anything by Luther (RIP!) Can I take you out tonight? A house is not a home

Whatever he sang on a grainy tape (or record wow I’m old) and just sitting on the couch kissing.

Anyone remember kissing til your lips were swole? What happened to that? That’s what I miss.

By Brooklyn

November 7, 2007 10:32 AM | Link to this

Morning blog.

I may be young but I do prefer old school dating. I love being wooed by a man and from what I hear of it, I think old school dating was alot more….real. Like you said, Wise, to a certain degree, men had to use their perosnality to get a woman, not so much the materialistic things. And there was such a thing as courting, drive in movies: all those romantic things that I am a sucker for. (Sigh)

By Jazzyone

November 7, 2007 10:33 AM | Link to this

abc ole school?? you would never understand it…had to be there…

I miss the house parties..wang dang doodles we called them the most fun I ever had in life…..singing in the basement turned into a lounge by classmates…chanting the roof..the roof..we don’t need no water let the M&^ f**a burn…

By Willie Dynamite

November 7, 2007 10:33 AM | Link to this

Old school definitely. Back then it was easier to separate the real from the simps. No fluff like it is today. You spent alot of time just straight up talking or walking. You had time to get to know someone. Nowadays the game has changed so it is very possible to put in that 2 week draws or nothing clause. Now I gotta get a few of those songs out my head. Over here thinking bout how I use to hemm em up at house parties.

2C Mayne I hadn’t heard that in 15 years (pulling tongue). Definitely got FLA on the brain now.

By AmazonRed 2.0

November 7, 2007 10:34 AM | Link to this

I’ve never gotten swollen lips from kissing. My lips are swollen naturally. LOL

Truth, I love Comcasts’s Smooth R&B. I’ll draw me a nice bubble bath, turn on 907 and let the day just melt away!

By SexyLeggs

November 7, 2007 10:34 AM | Link to this

Rell, thanks for that song. Other than “All I Do”, that’s one of my favorites. However, I prefer Melisa Morgan’s version better than Prince’s.

By lady j

November 7, 2007 10:35 AM | Link to this

Mine too Cemeeli!!!!!!!!!!!!! When Denzel/Frank walked up and killed Idris I was blown away!!!!! I knew it was a character but all i could say was DENZEL NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! lol

By Brooklyn

November 7, 2007 10:36 AM | Link to this

Morning blog.

I may be young but I do prefer old school dating. I love being wooed by a man and from what I hear of it, I think old school dating was alot more….real. Like you said, Wise, to a certain degree, men had to use their personality and appeal to get a woman, not so much the materialistic things. And there was such a thing as courting, drive in movies: all those romantic things that I am a sucker for. (Sigh)

By lady j

November 7, 2007 10:37 AM | Link to this

Lasdies I like the new joint by Chaka Khan!!!! Dont know the name of it but when I here it it is the bomb!!!!

By BLAT

November 7, 2007 10:38 AM | Link to this

**By Rell.com

November 7, 2007 9:04 AM |

^^^…funny thing is that it never left….it is just if you lead with the romance then you will fall into the friend zone or be labelled the nice guy….all the while sterling is beating a hole in her azz and eating her leftovers while she washes up….lol

**

STANDING UP IN CHURCH OF THE MLB CLAPPIN MY HANDS FOR RELL!!!!!!!!!!!!!

By Foots

November 7, 2007 10:41 AM | Link to this

Dan Anyone remember kissing til your lips were swole? What happened to that? That’s what I miss.

Oh goodness!! You brought about a GREAT memory of my senior year in high school. Me and my boyfriend kissed for an entire HOUR one time. I mean, lips connected for the WHOLE time, no deviation to the neck, chest, nothing. Just lips. I had the most swollen lips for days. My lips are very full anyway, so with them swollen, I could pass for the Goodyear Blimp! LOL!! It would have been hard to explain that to my mom, so I just made myself scarce until they went down.

By abc

November 7, 2007 10:43 AM | Link to this

Jazzy… haha, I’m pretty sure I was there! Ha!

By The Truth

November 7, 2007 10:45 AM | Link to this

Weather Man I’m glad you found something you like.

LadyJ what happened to you woman? You on injured reserve or something?

Co-signing China Dolls post. Its still out there.

Simi they have been doing some shows on history channel and i think its BET on Frank Lucas. He was a real ballsy dude. He said in one that the only thing he regrets is the lives those drugs took. He really felt bad about some woman who lost her son to his product. At the time it didn’t affect him because he was only focused on the money. Real ballsy dude.

Demetrix not to go back on my previous statements but a guy cant come out and show you his feelings until he’s sure you haven’t played yourself in the past. To do so would be foolish.

By Foots

November 7, 2007 10:46 AM | Link to this

Rell I performed a dance to Prince’s version of “Do Me, Baby” in class last week. You’ll have to see the vid.

I LOVE old school love songs. It’s really all I listen to. Luther, Jeffery, Stephanie, Marvin, Teddy, Patti, Peabo, The System, The Deele, The Dells, Freddie, Lionel, Glenn Jones, George Benson, Gregory Abbott, Howard Hewett, Anita…I keeps my staples on rotation in the iPod.

By lady j

November 7, 2007 10:47 AM | Link to this

Ok folk off to the doc and chk my mail…I am sure this will be an all day event….Yall hear Halley’s movie is the bomb too!!! Things we lost in the Fire!

Peace

By Jewel

November 7, 2007 10:48 AM | Link to this

yes back then the ladies would inviter there men friend over and COOK…seen it with my own eyes…would have all his favorites at the house..yea lets make that come back

Rell Done. What else you got? LOL!

By LuvinLife

November 7, 2007 10:50 AM | Link to this

Whatever happend with a man asking his girl’s father for her hand in marriage? I’ve had several friends recently get engaged and the man didn’t ask the father for his blessing. I think it’s a great tradition regardless of the couple’s age. Any thoughts?

By Jazzyone

November 7, 2007 10:50 AM | Link to this

* abc* Oh okay you were the one that was never invited to the house party but stayed outside in the car giving head to all the boys..yeah I remember one in every bunch..

By Foots

November 7, 2007 10:51 AM | Link to this

Another Old-School Memory: When I was a teenager, my (and my friends’) parents would rather for us to date at home. So we would have Movie Parties with several of us couples, where we would order pizza, eat popcorn, and try to get in as much kissing as we could before my Mama walked back through the room to make sure we weren’t doing anything freaky. LOL!!

By Jewel

November 7, 2007 10:55 AM | Link to this

Put in some real work and you get a womans heart. With the heart comes puddy, food, shoulder massages, the whole 9 yards. Now that is the truth. Add to that respect, support, believing in him and his dreams.

By Staceye

November 7, 2007 10:56 AM | Link to this

Rell * black men back then were uplifted and respect by the women…now-a-days…er uhhh..not* thatis because back then deserved it. They were stronger and more responsible then. The respect is lost today because of men slippin’& trippin’!

Jazzyone girrrrl…I COSIGN your 9:09! Preach it sista!

Foots I co-sgn your 9:38.

Ok you guys are taking i back with those songs. Oh my gosh I love 70’s music..but I really love 80’s music. Secret Garden I think will go down as my ultimate favorite panty dropper.

By Joker

November 7, 2007 10:57 AM | Link to this

Why did the Weather Man cross the road?

He was still attached to the turtle.

By Rell.com

November 7, 2007 11:00 AM | Link to this

@jewel…never done lady…i have something for you…what would you do THE MORNING AFTER - Frankie B and Maze

Chorus: After the morning after After the night before When all of the fun is over Would you not want me no more

Oh I, I want you, in the worst kind of way I would be lying to you If I said I didn’t want you to stay I’ve got somebody, and you’ve got somebody too What would they think, think about it And what would I think about you I know you think this is right But what happens after tonight Will you be there Will you even care I wanna know all this right now

{Chorus} No more

I know what you’re feeling I’ve been there before How will we know what we are doing And what if we both should want more I know it looks like it’s real But afterwards, how do you feel Will you feel bad, will we both feel sad I wanna know this right now

Chorus 2: After the morning after After the night before When all of the fun is over Will you want me anymore

{Chorus 2} (3x)

By daily lurker

November 7, 2007 11:01 AM | Link to this

Jazzyone, I think abc is a dude, and um ew?

By Dan

November 7, 2007 11:02 AM | Link to this

@LuvingLife

In many cases there are no fathers in the homes like that.

But I don’t see what’s wrong with asking the oldest male and/or the mother. A friend of mine just got married and did just that.

Anyone remember when your boy/girlfriend was over the door accidentally got closed (and locked).

By Jazzyone

November 7, 2007 11:02 AM | Link to this

ole school memory… waking up one morning in ealry teens and putting on a pair of brand spanking new Gloria Vanderbilt jeans with the red and green swan on the coin pocket looking it the mirror and realizing I grew hips and boobs overnight…. LMAOFF

By Willie Dynamite

November 7, 2007 11:03 AM | Link to this

Jazz That hasn’t changed at all. They call em Blockheads now. too funny!!!

By Bella

November 7, 2007 11:06 AM | Link to this

I’m suuuuuuuper old-fashioned anyway, and it’s served me well in my dating life. It weeds out the men who are just looking for a quick hook-up and allows me to date men who are gentlemen and truly enjoy my company!

lol…this blog makes me think of Pride and Prejudice for some reason — and all the dances they attended to meet suitors!

By Jewel

November 7, 2007 11:06 AM | Link to this

A house is not a home Dan Talk about old school charm…I went to the O’Jay’s, Jeffrey Osborne, and The Whispers concert back in February. One of the hosts went into the audience asking men to sing to their lady/wife/mistress. LOL! Whoever was with them that night. This man sang “A House is Not a Home” to his wife. They recently had a baby and were out for the first time since the birth. You could hear the love, passion and appreciation towards her in his voice.

By Cemeeli

November 7, 2007 11:08 AM | Link to this

@ Jewel - I follow…Cooking DONE! I hav eno problem.

@ Foots - i’m going to add to your 10:51 memory and say while mamma/dad was still at work after school trying to get in a kiss. I’m sure i’m not the only one.

By AmazonRed 2.0

November 7, 2007 11:08 AM | Link to this

Reading your old school memories have let me to one conclusion:

Y’all were some fast azzes! LOL

By Dan

November 7, 2007 11:09 AM | Link to this

@Staceye

I think that your statement Back then they deserved respect… is bogus. And here’s why.

Meeting a man and dating him you get to know that man. To generalize and say that men of this generation haven’t earned respect is kinda foul.

Personally, being a third generation b*******, I am dead for real about taking care of my kids (when I get them). So to assume that none of us have failed to recognize the past and are working to stop it, is kinda f*&87ed up.

By Wise Diva

November 7, 2007 11:09 AM | Link to this

Hey everyone! I am feeling SO nostalgic reading all the comments! Old school and traditional dating and mating, in a lot of ways, those were simpler times!

By Foots

November 7, 2007 11:10 AM | Link to this

LuvinLife Hmmmm…. The married folks I know, in most cases, that did happen. I know that my sister’s husband called our dad before he proposed, and my friend who just got engaged, he did call her father. It was a very sweet and respectful tradition, if the father is around to call…

By Rell.com

November 7, 2007 11:10 AM | Link to this

and another one

The whispers - get you in the mood

Feel much like romancing How’d you like to wine and dine I’d like to take you dancin’ Candle lights and dinner {We’ll both relax}

We’ll dance to sweet music How about some Marvin Gaye Feel like some sexual healing Just relax and let me do, let me do things my way

This is what I do (I wanna do it) to get you in the mood Baby, I’ll do it all to get you in the mood This is what I do to get you in the mood Baby, I’ll do it all to get you in the mood

This is what I do to get you in the mood (Ooh…ooh…)

Let me rub your shoulders {Just relax} Just let go Slip on somethin’ sexy It’s all right, baby, let me take control, hoo

Step into the shower I’ll wash your back and you’ll wash mine Please stay for one more hour I just want to make sweet love to you and feel you one more time

This is what I do (This is what I do) to get you in the mood Baby, I’ll do it all to get you in the mood (I wanna get you in the mood, baby) This is what I do (I wanna do it) to get you in the mood Baby, I’ll do it all to get you in the mood (Yeah, baby)

This is what I do (Woo) to get you in the mood Baby, I’ll do it all to get you in the mood This is what I do (I wanna do it) to get you in the mood Baby, I’ll do it all to get you in the mood (Ooh…ooh…)

Hoo…

This is what I do (I’ll do) to get you in the mood Baby, I’ll do it all to get you in the mood This is what I do (I wanna do it) to get you in the mood (We could take a shower, give you lovin’ by the hour) Baby, I’ll do it all to get you in the mood

This is what I do (I’ll do it just for you, baby) to get you in the mood Baby, I’ll do it all to get you in the mood

By abc

November 7, 2007 11:13 AM | Link to this

Oh, puh-leeeeze. Resort to such mindless insults if you can’t offer a meaningful thought, if you must.

Were the 1970’s not the setting for the sexual revolution, the one where sex won? Do you suppose that something you call ‘House Parties’ are strictly a relic from that era? How provincial.

Were people more genuine in the 1970’s? Sure, but that’s across the board, not just as relates to dating and romance. For instance, politics wasn’t best described as beating the public over the head with an insulting catch-phrase or slogan back then, until they believed that’s all that mattered — say ‘flip-flopper’, ‘race-baiter’, come up with some more of your own. The nation wasn’t consumed by the paradigm that all one must do is repeat the same lie enough that people come to believe it’s true. I suppose that sort of thing can be said to carry over into dating and other personal relationships.