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AJC.com > Living > Blog > Archives > 2007 > August > 01 > Entry
Put your cards on the table
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
Single people often complain about dating someone who is less than honest about their intentions. Unless you own a crystal ball, it can be really tough to decipher the mixed signals. What would happen if we all just put all our cards out on the table?
None of us are dating each other (I don’t think?), but if we were, what would you want to ask about dating or relationships? For instance, I want to know how men decide that they want a meaningful connection with a woman, instead of booty calls? Is it about the attraction, timing, blood alcohol level?
Ladies, what would you want men to know about dating you?
Guys, what could you tell the ladies about what really matters and what doesn’t in dating?
Let’s ask those questions you normally wouldn’t ask. So, just pretend you are slightly tipsy and have a little liquid courage. We can handle the truth, right!?
Permalink | Comments (231) | Post your comment | Categories: Dating




DEL.ICIO.US
Comments
By Sexione
August 1, 2007 8:17 AM | Link to this
Happy Humpty Hump Day Everybody!!!!
Wise I like this……….tell the dayum truth!!!! It’s just that simple. Why most people (esp. men, lol) don’t? Because they know if they did, they would not get the same results (or what they really want) out of a person/situation. So “lie to get __, it’s all a part of the game”, is a lot of folks mentality! And its just sad! I like this too…None of us are dating each other (I don’t think?) HAHAHAHAHAHA!! That’s funny!!! lol
By MsUnderstood aka MsU
August 1, 2007 8:22 AM | Link to this
Good Morning Everybody! Good topics Wise I will answer when I am full awake.
By SlimOne
August 1, 2007 8:28 AM | Link to this
Slim bustin in with wine cooler in hand (hiccup)
Wise Now yous know folks are secretly hooking up behind our backs on here. hiccup Now that’s the dayum truth. Besides, there was once….this time in band camp….
By MsUnderstood aka MsU
August 1, 2007 8:29 AM | Link to this
@ Sexione. Now that would be some funny stuff if some of our blogmates were in relationship with one another
By QC
August 1, 2007 8:40 AM | Link to this
Morning Bloggers I’m going over to holla at this nice looking guy at the bar….let me fill my cup up, and try to walk straight & twist at the same time. Sexieone, Slim1 can one of y’all make some dranks please..tank U!
Hey baby, how you doing..(hiccup) so tell me (hicup) “how big is it”? hiccup..QC now following nice looking guy to the storage room (hiccup)
Have a great day all
Hey WLB, MLB
By Sexione
August 1, 2007 8:42 AM | Link to this
Slim I hope you brought enough to share!! lol unless you’ve already finished them all, then we’ll understand… lol
MsU Now y’all didn’t hear it from me, but………….lmsao Relationships? probably not…hookups? probably so…hehehehe
By Twinkie
August 1, 2007 8:48 AM | Link to this
Good Morning, All! Long time lurker! As far the topic, I think as far as what you hope to achieve out of meeting this person should be discussed ie..if you are looking for LTR then say so.
Basically, just be upfront and state your intentions. Cuts down on confusion!
By QC
August 1, 2007 8:49 AM | Link to this
Sexi girl you know you right…i’m sure Slim gone hook us up…maybe when Cemeeli comes here she can make some her favorite carribean smoothie’s with a little kick to it..
By Sexione
August 1, 2007 8:50 AM | Link to this
Now y’all know I’m just clowning, right? lol
QC Dang gurl, you going to the storage room pretty early this a.m……lol We may have to cut you off from the booze, wouldn’t want you doing something you’ll regret! lol Now exactly how fine was he?
By Twinkie
August 1, 2007 8:52 AM | Link to this
Can I get an amaretto sour?
By MusingLee
August 1, 2007 8:53 AM | Link to this
Morn’in All,
I think it’s good not knowing er’thang right off the rip…It creates intrigue and gives us both something to discover about each other…Honestly if we knew anything we wanted to know, we might not give that person a chance and miss a good thing.
Musing now wondering why he’s blogging all early and ishh
By QC
August 1, 2007 8:53 AM | Link to this
What i would like a Man to know about me that i was dating is: i’m very much involved with my church/choir, i tend to get a little busy in the summer i.e. travelling, singing engagements, going to the studio, cook-out, picnics…but i’d let him know that he’s more than welcome to join me on my outings along with any other things that i do, i’m drama/stress free, and full of surprises, i can be your “best friend” I’m just a good person to be around.
By SeanJohnson3000
August 1, 2007 8:58 AM | Link to this
Sup Blog…will be sitting back in the cut today…
By QC
August 1, 2007 9:00 AM | Link to this
Welcome to the blog Twinkie
Sexi girl he is “fine, fine”, i’m drinking water now until noon, then i’ll get a refill maybe lol
Hey Musing
By SlimOne
August 1, 2007 9:04 AM | Link to this
Walking up to guy
Mmmm, you have hiccup some nice lips. Are you any good at…hiccup Oops, i need to go potty.
By QC
August 1, 2007 9:04 AM | Link to this
Why are you sittin’ in the cut today SJ?
By SlimOne
August 1, 2007 9:08 AM | Link to this
Sexione I have plenty for everyone. I brought the magic cooler today. When you open it up all you’ll see is ice but once you put your hand down in there, you’ll pull out whatever drink your heart desires. There is a catch….It’ll only work for 3 refills. After your third time, I’m not responsible for what you may pull out. Enjoy
By Gorilla O aka "Tha Code Cracka"
August 1, 2007 9:09 AM | Link to this
GoodMorning Er’body. whats up SexiOne, SlimOne, MsU, and QC
Wise Diva For instance, I want to know how men decide that they want a meaningful connection with a woman, instead of booty calls? Is it about the attraction, timing, blood alcohol level? i dont go out to meet a female with the thoughts of a long term relationship in mind. i just stay open-minded. if im dating a female and i just feel that connection and feel like i can have something with her then ill give it a shot, if not then it just is what it is.
SexiOne I like this……….tell the dayum truth!!!! It’s just that simple. Why most people (esp. men, lol) don’t? now you know its too early in the morning to start male bashing. and you also know that women lie a helluva lot more, and better, than men do. a woman can tell a man a lie with a straight face like its nothing. and yall know when yall have told a good one because yall have that look on your face like, damn that was a good one, ima have to use that one again.
SlimOne, i know you got some hen and coke over there. make sure you put more hen than coke, been a rough one already!
By Ladylike
August 1, 2007 9:10 AM | Link to this
Good Morning, and a Happy Hump Day to all my Blog Family.
My favorite of liquid courage in the summer is Pina Colada with the Rum, and I’ve had about three. I’m a Gemini so here we go.
What do you do, hobbys, pasatiempos?
Do you practice abstinence and if not exactly how sexually experienced are you?
What is you family like, big, small, friendly, violent, etc.? Do you have a past criminal record, if so, what is it?
What made you consider asking me out?
I know I’m a little tipsy, but are you a Christian?
Do you have any children, anywhere?
Now realize I will answer these same questions about myself.
By QC
August 1, 2007 9:10 AM | Link to this
Slim lmao! girl go back and finish the question
By abc
August 1, 2007 9:10 AM | Link to this
Personal and emotional compatibility, similar or complementary interests, pleasant and relatively drama-free company, physical attraction, sexual compatibility. I’m not so sure one can come up with a questionaire to spring on a date, especially early on, that will be very telling about what kind of person they really are. That’s something you have to discover over time. Consider whether that person is God’s provision for you.
By Cemeeli
August 1, 2007 9:10 AM | Link to this
Morning peeps Ceeeli dragging in this morning but definitley with syked out orange raspberry smoothies in tow.
To answer: What would you want men to know about dating you? Hang around long enough…you’ll be glad ya did. Kinda pigs back to what Musing’s post states on u don’t wanna know everything off the rip. I love a good mystery book.
By Ladylike
August 1, 2007 9:13 AM | Link to this
Welcome Twinkie.
By Cemeeli
August 1, 2007 9:25 AM | Link to this
Hey QC
By MsUnderstood aka MsU
August 1, 2007 9:30 AM | Link to this
Pass me a drink cuz i need something with all this work. I can’t even see my desk. What a guy need to know about me?? Don’t lie to me about nothing— that a straight turn off. Tell me the truth no matter how awful it is, i can respect a man who will tell the truth and i will be willing to work with him if he does but a lie will getcha gone quickly..
By Twinkie
August 1, 2007 9:31 AM | Link to this
Thank you QC and Ladylike!
By SlimOne
August 1, 2007 9:33 AM | Link to this
Slim stumbling out of the bathroom with tissue stuck to her shoe and her shirt tucked in her panties…walks back over to guy
Perrrdon me. I had to use the little girls room burrrrp! Hehehehehe, I’m so cwazy. But anyway, where were we?
Slim grabs the guys crotch while laughing. Then out of no where another dude starts cussing her out talking about stop being disrespectful to his life partner. Slim stammers away noticing another guy having drinks with his lady…. To Be Continued…
By SeanJohnson3000
August 1, 2007 9:33 AM | Link to this
Sup QC…i am in chill mode…no reason..just sitting in the cut…proofreading posts…..do have a question for the women though..would u rather be in a real meaningful relationship in which money was not as abundant.took both incomes to make.u lived in an average size house..2 hondas..2 kids..or would u rather be in something where the man took care of all the bills..u worked only if u wanted to…400k crib or better…vacations anywhere… u cared for him but wasnt truly inlove nor was he in you and quality time wasnt top priority..
By Sexione
August 1, 2007 9:35 AM | Link to this
Gorilla one comment and I’m male bashing? Stop being so sensitive! And I see you were ready to jump right on to woman bashing, but I’m not going there with you!
Slim I likes that magic cooler gurl…..I think…..no telling what I may pull out on the fourth try……..hope its something cool and refreshing!! lmsao
Musing I agree that some things should be learned over time, but some stuff needs to be discussed upfront. Then, we can proceed to the “time will tell” stuff.
By Ladylike
August 1, 2007 9:39 AM | Link to this
I think it’s all in the flow of the conversation. My response to such questions would be: I enjoy having parties, doing community service, and traveling. I do you practice abstinence and, I’ve had some sexual experience. My family is big, extremely friendly, and can become violent if provoked. No, I don’t have a past criminal record. I decided to say yes to your invitation because… I am a Christian, not perfect, so I do have a drink or two, I can hold my coladas. No children, no where.
By SlimOne
August 1, 2007 9:41 AM | Link to this
Sean J I’d chose the first one. Hondas are pretty dependable cars. lol I don’t want to be with anyone that I wasn’t truly in love with and who wasn’t truly in love with me. Quality time is a biggie with me. Why can’t a sister have both love and financial stability. I’m a person who loves hard so i’m not sure I’d be able to half step it.
Why do you ask?
By MsUnderstood aka MsU
August 1, 2007 9:41 AM | Link to this
heyGoriila O Slim for lunch dessert please order me a slice of Jamician Rum cake.Thanks girlie SJ I would rather have the real meaningful relationship in which money was not as abundant.took both incomes to make.u lived in an average size house..2 hondas..2 kids.. Give me Contentment & love Forget the money & material things baby..
By Twinkie
August 1, 2007 9:41 AM | Link to this
I would rather be in a “real meaningful relationship in which money was not as abundant.took both incomes to make.u lived in an average size house..2 hondas..2 kids..” I say this because I was raised the quality is better than quantity. So if the means I have to contribute to the household and not necessarily live the high life, I am okay if that means I am loved and I love the one I am with.
By Poppa Grande
August 1, 2007 9:43 AM | Link to this
Good morning all.
I have to agree with Musing. To some extent it is good to have some mystery.
As far as deciding the difference between a booty call and wife (I am married), it was when I went started talking to my wife without any expectations that I found someone that I felt that I could spend the rest of my life with. I just thinks that comes with maturity and being comfortable with you own strengths and weaknesses.
Telling the truth goes both ways, females have to be truthful with themselves as well. Pushup bras, fake eyelashes, and just make-up in general are cover-ups of the real you (both physically and in other ways as well). A lie is still a lie. Why not be proud of what good gave ya? I understand some foundation and such but some women put on full faces.
I wanted my wife to have the same face when we wake up that she has out and about. That’s what I got.
Think about this…why are there panties that have padding to make a females booty look bigger? lol
By melo
August 1, 2007 9:47 AM | Link to this
Merning ya’all! Guys, what could you tell the ladies about what really matters and what doesn’t in dating? which side of town u live,do u swing,how many tatoos u got,what do u like to do on the regular,you got a job, how many kids u got….?
What preceded this wasme observing how i like her azz and body and the way she walks. Now after asking those questions, i am making a determination of whether this is a hook up girl or a serious date.. and that determines what i am gonna tell her…50 percent of the truth(and not disclose the rest) or some contrived info to get her toes curly!! For a serious date, the other 50 percent of the truth will follow with time.
By Cemeeli
August 1, 2007 9:47 AM | Link to this
Proofreading Sean, That’s allright. But to answer your questions:
Would u rather be in a real meaningful relationship in which money was not as abundant or would u rather be in something where the man took care of all the bills? Actually the meaningful realtionship gets my vote. B/C a man taking care of all the bills is not what i have ever seeked for in a SO nor do i think i want…there goes that independant woman stuff. Dang what’s wrong with me?
By Sexione
August 1, 2007 9:50 AM | Link to this
SJ I’ll take the first one (real meaningful relationship with minimal $$) any day! With the right person, all of that other stuff is just that, “stuff”.
Something men should know about me…
Don’t lie to me. I will respect you much more if you’re honest. I don’t buy into the “double standard” or the “numbers game”, if you’re looking for your inferior match or looking to play around, go for it, but you won’t do it with me. I am a single mommie, and my child comes first. No, you can’t meet her, hang out at the house around her, or take “us” out until you’ve proven your worth. Again, I’m a single mommie, so don’t ask me to do anything that would go against my mommie persona/mindset! And definitely don’t ask me to do anything for you that you wouldn’t do for me!
Slim gurl, you are a mess!!!! grabbing that mans crotch!!! lol
By Deeva4Life
August 1, 2007 9:52 AM | Link to this
SeanJohnson3000 to answer your question…I’d take the meaningful relationship any day over the stuff. I think we all like nice things and for the most part we’d all like the finer things in live but true love and companionship has no price tag on it. One thing about it, when you’re building something together then you feel like you’ve contributed and can bask in the fruits of both parties labor. However, if he has everything and he’s not really into me or vice versa then I have to live with the thought that “HE” accomplished these things therefore this little fantasy world belongs to him. Lastly, when you have love, devotion and true committment in a relationship there really isn’t anything you two can’t have if you work together. You can have the crib, the car, the vacations…whatever. It may take time but it’s attainable.
By TRAVIS SMITH aka "Mr. Do Right"
August 1, 2007 9:53 AM | Link to this
GOOD MORNING ROOM This is going to be a good one for today, I hope I can be apart of it as much as I can If MAS-SA dont hit me with the slave whip today!!!! whats up GORILLA O, sexione, Ms. U, slimone
By QC
August 1, 2007 9:56 AM | Link to this
Ooooooooo, Slim has the “magic cooler” hajee-tachee, hee-woo, hee-woo… only 3 refills? Does that mean “3 refills, hiccup..in the same cup? or can you use a different cup everytime…hiccup?
QC’s now going to blog cafe looking through all the cabinets and getting 18 different cups for Slim to refill 3 times each for me, lol hiccup…
Hey Gorilla
By Jewel
August 1, 2007 9:56 AM | Link to this
Good morning Everyone!
What would happen if we all just put all our cards out on the table? Or, why do people have difficulty putting their cards on the table? Why is it easier to lie or withhold important facts about oneself? Granted, you do not need to tell everything at once, but there should be no hidden agendas. If you know what you want (or don’t want) in a relationship or in dating, why not share those things with the other person? If you want to play, fine…find a playmate. It is best to let the other person make his or her own decisions.
Ladies, what would you want men to know about dating you? That I really am who I say I am. No pretense. My first thought is not whether he is marriage material. Just because I say, “yes, I would like to get married again someday” does not mean I want to marry you. I believe in enjoying the moment. Do not ask me what I really think if you do not want an honest answer. Every date does not have to cost $100 or more. There are many inexpensive ways to enjoy each other’s company. After all, we are only dating. A committed relationship takes it to a different level.
If slightly tipsy means I have had too much Pepsi or mango flavored tea, count me in!
Have a Powerful, Productive, Prosperous and Positive Day!!!
By Twinkie
August 1, 2007 9:58 AM | Link to this
I think I would want a man to know general information about me..kids, tats, family background, likes and dislikes, etc…How the relationship progresses determines how much information I will share with someone.
By Gorilla O aka "Tha Code Cracka"
August 1, 2007 10:00 AM | Link to this
im dying to see how the women answer Sean J’s question. before yall answer, keep in mind this is KEEP IT REAL WEDNESDAY, so keep it real!
aight SexiOne, we’re gonna have a good day today. no female bashing from me and no male bashing from you…deal?
By SeanJohnson3000
August 1, 2007 10:01 AM | Link to this
Thanks for the responce ladies…but to i asked a 40 plus yr old female that question..who has been through a marriage that didnt work…single parent with a kid..working hard to make ends meet..and she was like ..” i am tired of working hard”..and basically she wants some who can give her the world..since love is not promised..and that if the dude was taking care of all of the househould…she wouldnt mind if he had a side chick…so i think depending on your age and how love and relationships been to you…your answer and repsonse may change..
By Ladylike
August 1, 2007 10:07 AM | Link to this
I must keep in mind that when meeting people on the first two or three dates you are meeting their representative, you may not see the good and bad of that person in the beginning. So some cards will not reveal themselves until some time has passed. I have to get some coffee, whew I’m sleepy.
By QC
August 1, 2007 10:08 AM | Link to this
lmao @ Slim
By SlimOne
August 1, 2007 10:12 AM | Link to this
QC realizes shes standing in a massive puddle of alcohol. Then she realizes all 18 of her cups have holes in them. That dayum Slimmmmm!
By MsUnderstood aka MsU
August 1, 2007 10:14 AM | Link to this
@ Slim1 I’m a person who loves hard so i’m not sure I’d be able to half step it. Dang Girlie you too, that why I’m so over-protective who I fall for these days. Sexi1 ^5^5 i can always depend on you to add anything i forget to add.lol I am a single mommie, and my child comes first. No, you can’t meet her, hang out at the house around her, or take “us” out until you’ve proven your worth. Again, I’m a single mommie, so don’t ask me to do anything that would go against my mommie persona/mindset! And definitely don’t ask me to do anything for you that you wouldn’t do for me Hey Travis are you saying you gonna do right or just for today?lol
By Deeva4Life
August 1, 2007 10:18 AM | Link to this
SeanJohnson I’ve been in a marriage that didn’t work before and although I’m not 40 and I have no children, I work two jobs and I’m going to school…I know what it feels like to be tired of working hard. However, being in a dead in relationship (and I’ve had my share of those) is mentally and emotionally draining. As Slim stated earlier, it would be nice to have both (love and financial security) but peace of mind is invaluable. So if I have to work hard physically to make sure I’m taken care of then so be it, but I’m not willing to compromise my body or my sanity just to have someone else stroke the bills. And regardless what she says no woman truly wants to share her man…no matter if he’s paying all the bills or not. That’s my .02.
By Cemeeli
August 1, 2007 10:21 AM | Link to this
@SeanJ - Please know that is just the hype of her ‘tired of working hard’sitchiation.
If she married said dude; ‘she wants some who can give her the world..’ and there is not anything meaningful with that. Positive she’d get ‘tired’ of that too. Some ppl say things that they think/will benifit to their current situation. I’m tired of driving myself to a-z but i’m not about to start walking. But you know…to each is own…i dunno.
By QC
August 1, 2007 10:21 AM | Link to this
Thanks Slim, i thought i made a real “boo boo”. QC’s going to “Leroy’s house of Likka” and purchase a 25 gallon Keg w/open mouth spout
By Staceye
August 1, 2007 10:23 AM | Link to this
SJ3000 to answer your question I want a mixture of both. But if I really had to choose, I would choose the latter of the 2…and before you jump down my throat, I have loved deeply and all I get is hurt. So I believe love is so overrated. I will just look fun & enjoyment more so than the emotional rollercoaster called love. On topic: I hate when you tell a guy that you are looking for a relationship and they feed you the okie doke to get what they want from you and then they change their story…”uh, I don’t rush into relationships. I take my time to get to know thw girl because I take relationships very seriously.” Dude…I said relationship, not marriage. It ain’t THAT serious. So my thing is just be honest. You want the benefits of a relationship but you won’t committ because basically you want the option to date other people. GREEDY & SELFISH is what I call it. Just be real and straight up about it. That is why I feel the way I feel about men and relationships in general.
By Jewel
August 1, 2007 10:24 AM | Link to this
SeanJ Is that a rhetorical question? A setup? Or what? I want the 400k “crib”, the Rolls Royce, vacations anywhere without him…who needs quality time when I can spend my time in my house and car!? LOL!
By Sexione
August 1, 2007 10:26 AM | Link to this
Gorilla deal! lol
SJ I’m willing to bet that that same woman would change her mind once she got a good dose of what she thinks she wants. the grass ain’t always greener, hellz sometimes it’s not even grass! lol
MsU you know I got you gurl!! lol You know Travis can only behave for a portion of the day! hehehe
By Cinderella
August 1, 2007 10:29 AM | Link to this
HALLEDAMLUJAH my boys went back to school today!!! WHOO-HOO!!
on topic: Ladies, what would you want men to know about dating you? Cinderella does not do casual sex. We will not be getting naked on the 1st date. I am a lady, and will be treated as such. And I have boys active in sports and it consumes ALOT of my time. Understand that our time together is limited during football and baseball season but I wont neglect you. You can join or deal…or keep movin.
By Tazzee
August 1, 2007 10:34 AM | Link to this
Morning Folks!
This is a good topic today Wise. I don’t have any questions for the guys because to be honest, I’m tired of trying to figure men out. It is what it is and when mine comes along, I’ll know it.
As far as what I want men to believe about me - simply I say what I mean and I mean what I say - that is the main thing with me that guys just don’t get the first time around. Either that or they just like to challenge me.
SeanJ - I’ll take the first scenario without the kids.
By Tazzee
August 1, 2007 10:37 AM | Link to this
SeanJ follow-up response, but if we had to have kids in the equation, I would choose the second scenario.
By Raqi
August 1, 2007 10:38 AM | Link to this
SeanJohn Most women (99.98%) want it all and that’s the God given truth. My first marriage was exactly what you described. Meaningful and loving without the luxury of my not having to work to make ends meet. Although I knew my husband loved and cared for me and our son, that didn’t stop me from wanting all the other stuff. I didn’t sweat it but I did desire it. On any given day when asked you will get the response you have all gotten on here, but honestly most of us, IMO, wouldn’t want to not have the love and the materials all wrapped up into one.
I have a pretty good set up now but I still desire “things” that I know are just mere extras in our lives. But I am not one to spend on something just to say I have it.
But yeah I like having the meaningful above just having the other “stuff”.
By melo
August 1, 2007 10:39 AM | Link to this
@Staceye,i hate when you tell a guy that you are looking for a relationship and they feed you the okie doke to get what they want from you and then they change their story And they are getting what they want after how long? I ask because that may be what caused the story to change. If u dish it at the drop of a hat, they will leave as soon as their dyck has been licked clean!!
By SeanJohnson3000
August 1, 2007 10:39 AM | Link to this
@ Tazzee…i got question for you..
By Wise Diva
August 1, 2007 10:39 AM | Link to this
Good morning! I love to see our blog cast show up every day, it’s funny how I think I can predict what some of you will say, yet you manage to surprise me, LOL.
We already have some fantastic questions out there, keep them coming, and let’s try to tackle some of the answers! Any new readers, please join in!
Poppa Grande, I meant to welcome you when you first posted, I really enjoyed your comments the other day - interesting perspective you have.
Welcome twinkie! I use to adore amaretto sours, I have moved on to a new drink of choice, midori sours. I sure could use one right about now, too, and I don’t care that it is before noon!
By Jewel
August 1, 2007 10:41 AM | Link to this
SeanJ That woman’s response is possibly the result of one or two things, or both; (1) Her concept and expectations of love did not work the first time. (2) She probably did all of the hard work in the previous relationship/marriage. However, not all women think the same. Our responses to life experiences, what we are willing to grow, from is crucial.
By Tazzee
August 1, 2007 10:44 AM | Link to this
SeanJ sure, you can post it or send me an email Tazzee@gmail.com - whatever your pleasure.
By TRAVIS SMITH aka "Mr. Do Right"
August 1, 2007 10:45 AM | Link to this
I would like to know a womans history, I think the person who is going to end up being my wife is a person who has history and has experienced lifes good and bad times, I cant see myself being with a person that has been spoiled or spoon fed all her life, because when the bad times come in the relationship she will nut up and wont know how to handle herself or the relationship in hard times. On the other hand I dont want someone who has been struggling all her life and when we come up together she wont go nuts and mess up the credit buying things she has never had. @ Sean J I believe alot of women will choose the 400k crib and the benz lifestyle, but a few women will go for the happiness. what will happen if we put all the cards on the table? It will be alot of single women and men in Atlanta, the reason I say this is because If we knew a persons bad side and flaws before we got into a relationship we wouldnt be in that relationship, since we dont find out the flaws until we are 6 months to a year into the relationship we learn to accept it and deal with it. guys what would you tell a woman what matters and what dosent about dating What matters are the little things, Its more than just them in the relationship, As a couple we have to stay in OUR lane and not keep up with the jones, It wont take much to make a man happy. Just stop complaining all the time.
By Deeva4Life
August 1, 2007 10:47 AM | Link to this
Tazzee do you not want children?
By Wise Diva
August 1, 2007 10:48 AM | Link to this
um..ew Melo, please let’s not get THAT graphic..geesh
and I don’t need those kind of images in my head during my celibate years!
By Mo (now known as Moeisha)
August 1, 2007 10:49 AM | Link to this
Morning All!!
SlimOne you are off da chain already!! LMAO!
SJ The answer to your question, the first guy. The second options leaves room for cheating b/c you would be so unhappy. No need to choose to be unhappy.
what I want a man I am dating to know about me: I am a parent & divorcee, very laid back, drama free, love to watch sports but also love to read, I love to dress up but I also love to chill in jeans and t-shirt, I am all about having a fun, and I have tons of family that I hang with on a regular….I think that takes care of most of it!!
By Twinkie
August 1, 2007 10:54 AM | Link to this
Thank you for the welcome, Wise! I will have to try that midori sour. Trying to spice up my life now that I am staring down 30.
By Ladylike
August 1, 2007 10:55 AM | Link to this
Melo sometimes you break the rules tremendously. The image is to colorful, spare me. Dang I know drink a little, but I’m tryin to hold it together here! Don’t wanna picture no male body parts nude.
By Tazzee
August 1, 2007 10:56 AM | Link to this
Deeva4Life* No.
By TRAVIS SMITH aka "Mr. Do Right"
August 1, 2007 10:57 AM | Link to this
TRAVIS WILL IGNORE THE BEHAVIORAL COMMENTS MADE BY MS. U and SEXIONE
By Twinkie
August 1, 2007 10:58 AM | Link to this
Travis I would like to know a womans history, I think the person who is going to end up being my wife is a person who has history and has experienced lifes good and bad times, I cant see myself being with a person that has been spoiled or spoon fed all her life, because when the bad times come in the relationship she will nut up and wont know how to handle herself or the relationship in hard times. On the other hand I dont want someone who has been struggling all her life and when we come up together she wont go nuts and mess up the credit buying things she has never had.
I agree you 100%. I want a mate that has had their share of ups and downs so when we are good we are enjoying the good and when things are bad, we can still be strong and maintain.
By Tracie
August 1, 2007 10:58 AM | Link to this
What I want the men to know when they are dating? 1. Be yourself, don’t be something you are not. Because the BS will rise to the top.
2. Open car doors, doors and treat me with respect. Chivalry is not dead. It can get you a long way. 3. The little things count. Let a lady know you are thinking about her.
By MsUnderstood aka MsU
August 1, 2007 10:58 AM | Link to this
You can have all the material things in the world and still be unhappy. Love doesn’t hurt. If someone broke your heart they didn’t love you from the start that was lust. Once the lust is fulfill it leaves you high and dry. @SJ I think it wrong for a woman to think a man is gonna pay all of her bill that she made by herself. I got a friend like that she is bad with money and always talkin bout she need a man so he can help her pay her bill. Not? I don’t expect it and i don’t want it expected of me. What ever bill i have pior to meeting you i can handle. Whatever bills we make together we can handle them. We will support each other. I met two guys last week. Both were physical attractive-the only difference is that one tried to overly impress me(with lies) and it turn me off. The other one was straight up honest he wasn’t trying to impress me at all . i walk away having respect for dude #2 knowing he was being real and yes i added him as a friend i want to get to know better and hang out with.
By Staceye
August 1, 2007 11:01 AM | Link to this
Melo I don’t really time it. I just let it happen. Its sometimes been a month, 3 weeks, 2 months, etc…but a woman knows within the first 10 minutes whether she wants to do you or not. She may want to wait to get to know you…but on the lust factor, she knows straight off the base. But what gets me is a guy is such a horn dog that if you don’t give it to him he is like a dog in heat and he will go find it elsewhere. Now if you are giving him the companionship and the booty….what else does it take for a man to commit? I had that happen to me and then we ended…but now he is trying to worm his way back to me. I no longer want him. Once you hurt me I don’t forgive you. I don’t backtrack and I move on. My friends say he had that Upgrade Mentality (like we spoke of yesterday) now he sees the grass ain’t green at all (as was posted earlier). he wanted his option to date others…even though he claims he was not dating or messing with anyone else. Now he wants what he had but let go of. I refuse to Tango with Satan again! I am almost to the point of dogging men the way they dog women. I have done it before and I loved it. It felt like retribution. But it got old quickly.
By SeanJohnson3000
August 1, 2007 11:02 AM | Link to this
@ Taz..being that u are ultra spiritual/religous..and are celebate for those reasons…and u picked option 1 with out the kids…my question to you is…being that GOD is so important to you and your life…not trying or wanting to turn this into a big debate…one if his main instructions to us..is ..” to be fruitfull and multiply”…whats your take on this..being that you have no desire to have kids…u can respond here on email me ..seanjohnson3000@yahoo.com
By QC
August 1, 2007 11:02 AM | Link to this
Hey Mo
By Tazzee
August 1, 2007 11:04 AM | Link to this
Twinkie you should also try a mojito if you like the sweet drinks
By Gorilla O aka "Tha Code Cracka"
August 1, 2007 11:09 AM | Link to this
Pastor Creflo Travis Smith…PREACH MY BROTHA PREACH!!! i feel you on the not wanting a woman who has been spoon fed all her life. they’re ungrateful as hell and you dont know what they’re there for. my ideal woman would be someone who struggled with me. we were at the bottom together and worked collectively to come up. at least i know what she’s there for me and doesnt have a hidden agenda.
By Deeva4Life
August 1, 2007 11:13 AM | Link to this
Tazzee I was just curious. Any particular reason why? And if it’s something personal that you prefer not to disclose, I understand.
By Staceye
August 1, 2007 11:15 AM | Link to this
Tazee if you do not want children I can understand that….I don’t. I like having my freedom, traveling, shopping, and knowing that after tithes, savings and bills my money is mine to do whatever I please. I never have to do without something. I never had to as a child so why start now as an adult. And yes I am an only child… Plus I love them when they are infants, they are cute…but after they start walking and talking….get away! Is there a boarding school for 2 year olds? I’ll take you back around age 10 (for girls) and 12 (for boys)! LOL No I am not a child hater…I just have no patience!
By Twinkie
August 1, 2007 11:18 AM | Link to this
Tazzeeoh my goodness, mojitos. I had a very bad experience with one of those. It was way too minty. Any places that makes a good one?
By Jake
August 1, 2007 11:19 AM | Link to this
What up Peeps:
Cards are revealed as needed, besides, lets be honest, you know what is going on from the get go.
Unless you are living a celibate lifestyle, evryone is a potential piece of azz (WLB, we know ya’ll think like this too), the interaction between the two decides whether the sex will actually happen, and whether you will want more from the person.
As MC Breed would say, “there ain’t no future in your frontin”
By Tracie
August 1, 2007 11:20 AM | Link to this
Gorilla, May I ask you when do you get tired of struggling? After you reach a certain age you should be a certain point in your life. For example own your own home, have good credit and be responsible. As you get older you relize that the opposite sex should be at a certain place in their life. I am not interested in a man who is still in his mothers house. When do you relize you need your own place? Be an ADULT. I have had conversations with guys who are turned off by women that have room mates. They are surprised they are not on their own. Maybe because I am 38 I feel like there are places you should be in your life. I am very turned off my a man who can’t keep his cable on or getting arrested for not paying for their traffic tickets. I guess what I am saying is HANDLE YOUR BUSINESS!!
By Tracie
August 1, 2007 11:26 AM | Link to this
To Staceye, Atleast you are honest. It is nothing wrong with not having children it is your choice. It just shows you know yourself. There are too many reports of child abuse and neglect. And we have all said some people should not have children. I don’t have any but that is because I want to be married. But I am not pressed to have them or not. it is a option. In the mean time I am enjoying my life.
By melo
August 1, 2007 11:26 AM | Link to this
@Stacey, thanks for being so open about this. My take is, a man will find booty whether u give to him or not. If u dont, he may move on to get it from somebody. A woman who knows what they want should stick to their guns and not succumb to what a man “demands”
They key to having a meaningful relationship is for a woman to have their own ambitions and aspirations outside of a man. Once u find a man whose ambitions and apsirations conicide with urs, then and only then do u have an option to put the man to the test to see if they mean what they say.Meanwhile ur puddsy is under lock until such time he has stuck around long enough that some luv has developed between u two!
By SeanJohnson3000
August 1, 2007 11:31 AM | Link to this
@ Deeva4Life..how old are u?
By Deeva4Life
August 1, 2007 11:32 AM | Link to this
Staceye now many may look at your post as someone who’s extremely selfish but I applaud the fact that you are honest about how you feel regarding the situation. It beats women who really have the same outlook but still go and get pregnant and then mistreat the children.
By TRAVIS SMITH aka "Mr. Do Right"
August 1, 2007 11:33 AM | Link to this
GORILLA O* My brother you said the two words that can sum up what men and women are really thinking about when the start dating someone…….WHATS THEIR HIDDEN AGENDA I feel safe to say we all want to know why is he/she wanting to talk to me, is he/she trying to use me as a come up! Thats why TRAVIS and GORILLA O go crazy when money is mention to us from a woman we barely know because the HIDDEN AGENDA was really “let me see can I get this paid or get a new outfit out of him” Its really and insult plus very disrespectful to me (dont know about GORILLA O) when a woman comes out and asks for money after a week or two. If you feel you can ask me for your HIDDEN AGENDA before a month goes by I feel like I can get a HIDDEN AGENDA myself and ask you for some &$$ and &*^% within a month!!!
By NCGirlfromATL
August 1, 2007 11:34 AM | Link to this
Wise I have always said that honesty is the best policy…with a caveat. I think people don’t understand the difference between honesty and tact. As women, we often say that we just want a man to tell us the truth. But, when we hear it, it’s often what we don’t want to hear, or worse how we don’t want to hear it. Laying your cards on the table, and asking the other person to do the same comes with consequences. As adults, if we want that to happen, we need to learn how to handle the fall out.
By Deeva4Life
August 1, 2007 11:38 AM | Link to this
SeanJohnson3000 I’m 30.
By QC
August 1, 2007 11:40 AM | Link to this
Hey Jake you want something to drink?, meet me in the storage room..hiccup…
By MsUnderstood aka MsU
August 1, 2007 11:42 AM | Link to this
^5 NCGirl. Very Good post
By Staceye
August 1, 2007 11:46 AM | Link to this
Melo I understand what you are saying. I do have my own ambitions and goals. I do not focus on a man. My main focus is getting ME right. If a guy comes along so be it…if not, again…so be it. Tracie I thank you for what you said…some people speak as if there is something wrong with me for not wanting any. I have been called selfish. I say selfish is those who have the kid because they got knocked up accidentally and knowing that they are not ready for a kid mentally or financially. I think it is unfair that a child has to struggle because they did not ask to be here. You as the parent should think about that before having unprotected sex. Also people try to push you to have children because you are a woman and that should be a natural desire…when in fact just because your we blessed with a functioning uterus does not mean you should reproduce. It is a horrible feeling to be a child and know you were an accident or never really wanted…. you feel abandoned and not worthy of life because you feel that the people that brought you into the world did not want you, so how is anybody else gonna want you? Then people get biblical about it..you know the whole be fruitful thing. But that is not something to be taken literal for every human being. If that is the case,should a woman who is addicted to drugs and riddled with disease multiply just becasue it was written in the bible? So I thik people who decide not to have children are people who have seriously thought everything through. God bless that want and those that choose not to.
By Staceye
August 1, 2007 11:55 AM | Link to this
Thank you Deeva4Life I appreciate that fact that you see my post for what it was meant to be.
By Tracie
August 1, 2007 11:56 AM | Link to this
Staceye, AMEN!!
By TRAVIS SMITH aka "Mr. Do Right"
August 1, 2007 11:59 AM | Link to this
@ TRACIE I couldnt have said it more better even though Im 25 I really do believe and stress it…BE GROWN AND HANDLE YOUR BUSINESS!!!! I love a person that is responsible and that handles their business (besides the rooomate thing your right on point!!!! i have a roomate but as soon as the lease is up im gone!!!) Tracie* whats really sad is that im going to mess around and find someone i love and want to marry then im gonna do a credit check and PULL AN USHER!!!
By Tazzee
August 1, 2007 12:00 PM | Link to this
SeanJ not a big debate at all. Trust me, I’ve been asked this many times and my response is usually super long. However - I’ll try to condense it for the sake of the blog.
That charge was given to mankind and I honestly believe there is enough multiplication going on without me. The bible also says that children are a blessing from God. First of all, He hasn’t blessed me with anyone to be fruitful with - but should He decide to bless me with a child, I would raise it and be the best mother I can be. But honestly, with the amount of sex I’ve had before celibacy and the times that I’ve had it since - if God really wanted me to have a child, then He would have blessed me with one by now.
My proclamation that I don’t want children is simply me being real. Because God knows me better than I know myself - He and I talk about this all the time. I can’t deny how I truly feel. You might recall I’ve posted many times that I spent a large part of my adult preparing for marriage and children simply because that’s what is expected of a Christian woman. I wanted kids so bad it hurt. Then as time went on and I learned more about who I am (with the help of God) I realized that I really have no desire to have a child. So in my conversations with the Father, I’m like ‘God, what’s up with that?’ Until He shows me otherwise - I can’t deny that part of me.
Deeva to put it in a nutshell - children are a huge responsibility that I don’t choose to willingly take on.
By Deeva4Life
August 1, 2007 12:02 PM | Link to this
SeanJohnson3000 any particular reason you asked that?
By Sunny
August 1, 2007 12:06 PM | Link to this
Hey all…Good topic….I have a question..I just met this guy like a week ago from this past sunday…& he is already talking about how special I am to him & thatI came into his life at the right time, & I dont have to look any further…blah blah blah….It all sounds sweet but I just think its too soon to be talking like that…we only been out once…he works out of town at times & have been this week…So tell me guys what would make a guy say or feel this way about someone so soon….I know it could be BS…just not sure what he would expect to gain BTW I am very attracted to him…
By Tazzee
August 1, 2007 12:10 PM | Link to this
Staceye I’ve been called selfish many times. No offense at all to those that have children, or desire to have children - but the selfishness comes when you want to have your own child - most say to leave ‘their legacy’. Now mind you, after the child comes, the act of raising a child is one of the most unselfish acts there is - but the desire to have one is selfish because there are many children out there with no parents that can become someone’s ‘legacy’.
While I may not have children that look like me physically - there are those that look like me spiritually. The have inherited my integrity, character and morals. And personally that is what I think counts. I absolutely adore mentoring youth. I have a passion for the youth and I would probably deal with more if I didn’t have to go through crazy parents - but that’s a whole ‘nother’ story.
By Sexione
August 1, 2007 12:10 PM | Link to this
Any person (male or female) that doesn’t want kids has the right to make that choice. Everyone (even if you were built with a uterus) is not supposed to have children! So for those that don’t, kudos to you for realizing it beforehand!! And for those that do, do you! And may God bless us all!!!
Travis rumor has it (I know, right!) that the wedding will go on. Of course no one will ever know the real reason the initial ceremony was called off………..and then, who really cares!!! lol
By Bre
August 1, 2007 12:12 PM | Link to this
Sunny Trust me he’s married!
By melo
August 1, 2007 12:15 PM | Link to this
@SUNNY,he is softening u up saying the right things.Typical man talk…read my post above and take it from there.Good luck!!
By MsUnderstood aka MsU
August 1, 2007 12:21 PM | Link to this
Hi Sunny! Just stick around see what the wall gonna look like. You sound very excited; have fun a just proceed with cautions!! JMO
By Hmmm....
August 1, 2007 12:21 PM | Link to this
I figured ya’ll would be discussing the sex survey and adding to the 237 reasons folks have sex!
One (or more) men on here referenced women’s ankles being very revealing with regard to her sexual prowess/ability. I’ve asked and searched everywhere and am dying of curiosity…. does ANYONE have “the rest of the story???”
Puhlease enlighten me! Thank you!
By Tracie
August 1, 2007 12:22 PM | Link to this
Travis You won’t need to pull a Usher if you pay attention to the persons spending habits and how they pay their bills before you fall in love. Truest me there are always sign. I will give you an example. I had been dating a guy for about a month and i went over to his house and I asked was it ok to watch TV he said it wasn’t good idea because the cable company was trippin. I said what do you mean? He said he was in a dispute about his bill. I said do you mean you didn’t pay your bill? He admited that he hadn’t paid his bill in 2 months. He was 35 years old at the time. That was a sign that he can’t handle his money or business. You will know what you need ot know before you walk down that aisle. Just be willing to see it.
By Sexione
August 1, 2007 12:25 PM | Link to this
Sunny come on now?!!! Either dude is married and full of ish………..or just plain full of ish!!! You’ve got to give us more details to know for sure………..
By Staceye
August 1, 2007 12:26 PM | Link to this
Sunny trust me girl…it’s a Knicker Slipper! He is trying to get you to give up the knickers so he will say and do anything to get it. Just start sneezing and tell him that you are allergic to bullshyt and he is a lethal dose!
By Tazzee
August 1, 2007 12:28 PM | Link to this
Sunny take his words with a grain of salt. If he isn’t married, as Bre stated, then his words will change as soon as he gets a chance to see your faults. AND if they don’t then - hey, you’ve hit the jackpot. But give it some time and see if there is some consistency behind those words.
SeanJ - one more thing, I struggle a lot with what I want vs. what God wants. Shoot, I don’t ‘want’ to be celibate - but I’ve found that obedience is a great thing. I’m tempted to have sex frequently, so I know I can be obedient in that area. I haven’t even come close to actually crossing the ‘my will vs. God’s will’ bridge concerning children. I’ve always said that if I should love a man so much that I want to marry him, I would want nothing more than to have his child - if not for me, then because he wants one. But on the outside looking in - I’d rather not.
By Poppa Grande
August 1, 2007 12:29 PM | Link to this
NCGirl…very good post.
Coming from a male standpoint…I don’t think that we are really that hard to figure out. I’ve even told my wife’s single female friends this…
The three “Fs” can really keep a good man around if you want him. Be out Friend, Feed Us, and you know the other.
The amount of each varies for each man, but a female should be able to find one that is compatible to her needs.
FYI…Feed us doesn’t always mean real physical food. Although that is good, most single men can at least fix basic meals. However, sometimes we need to be “fed” a compliment for no reason, or “fed” a nugget of inspiration. We have to deal with the same daily societal grinds that females have to deal with. I’m not saying we need it constantly, but at at least let us know when we do a good job.
If he needs it all the time, he might be a little light in his loafers. But even a man, needs to hear “Good Job, Baby.”
We hear about the bad, so we should also hear about the good as well.
By Gorilla O aka "Tha Code Cracka"
August 1, 2007 12:31 PM | Link to this
Tracie, i agree with you 100%. when you are a certain age you should be at a certain point in your life. everyone has their own goals on what they want to accomplish by the time they get to a certain age. and i shouldve worded what i said differently and said that my ideal woman would have been someone that struggled with me and we came up together. ‘cause although i havent met my ultimate goal yet, im far from struggling. but i feel where your coming from.
you wild Travis
By Staceye
August 1, 2007 12:36 PM | Link to this
Poppa Grande even though you give a man the 3 F’s…he still acts like a caged animal that needs to be set free…especially in the summer. But then by fall he wants to be all “Boo’d Up”!
By sunny
August 1, 2007 12:40 PM | Link to this
Hey..Thanks for the comments..I have been thinking the same thing…(Staceye that was funny…Just start sneezing and tell him that you are allergic to bullshyt and he is a lethal dose!) lol…Thanks for all the comments…I am no fool by any means nor am I that desperate so time will tell…
By TRAVIS SMITH aka "Mr. Do Right"
August 1, 2007 12:42 PM | Link to this
JUST FOR THE RECORD Women tend to expect men to have their stuff together more than men expect a woman to. I guess men tend to think that we as men are expected to pick up the slack where a woman falls off!!!
By C tha 1
August 1, 2007 12:43 PM | Link to this
^5 Travis … a woman needs to know how to handle “for richer or poorer and through sickness and health”. Some women just talk the talk, but when faced with the pressure of reality they may not be able to walk the walk.
By Sexione
August 1, 2007 12:45 PM | Link to this
Hey Poppa Grande and welcome! (I don’t think I said it before.) I like the angle you’re bringing, unfortunately we all know that a woman can give a man the 3 “F”s plus 2 (5 “F”s) and he will still show up, show out and leave. Its a good start, but that doesn’t mean he’ll stick around (we know that nothing is guaranteed). Shoot to be honest, most men will take her 3 “F”s, and be out looking for the same “F”s from another. It is what it is……….
By Poppa Grande
August 1, 2007 12:46 PM | Link to this
Staceye….Unfortunately, that is a pitfall that males have as being visually stimulated. However, most real men that are getting the 3F’s are gonna show restraint. Otherwise, you are just dealing with a boy in a man’s body.
Age doesn’t make a man, just as age doesn’t make a woman. There are plenty of phyiscally grown boys and physically grown girls masquerading around as men and women.
By The Truth
August 1, 2007 12:46 PM | Link to this
Hi blog fam. Good to see some of you. I’m just dropping in for a quick moment to see whats the haps. Hi WLB, wattup and where the fug is the MLB?
On topic: Poppa Grande the 3 F’s are feed me, fug me, and let me rest my fuggin head, in no particular order.
Sexi I read your earlier post and I’d like to figure something out. You say you want a man but you want him to play 3rd wheel to a daughter thats going to leave you in a few years. Its ok for him to contribute to your household but he is not the priority. He is lower on the totem pole than a child. Then after she leaves he gets kicked up a notch or 2. Is that the story? I hope you plan on being single forever.
In a healthy family the husband and wife are priority uno. Children follow. You can’t neglect an adult for 18 years then hope they mysteriously have feelings for you. I once again realize why there is such a divide in relationships.
Special shouts to those fam members that hold a special place in my heart. You know who you are. Handle em SJ, O, Jake, and Travis. LOL
As I said just dropped in to say hi. Keep it moving ev1. The Truth is out.
By TRAVIS SMITH aka "Mr. Do Right"
August 1, 2007 12:52 PM | Link to this
C tha 1 CHURCH!!!!!! my brother Alot of women are down wit ya as long as your riding down the smooth road in ALPHARETTA but as soon as you ride through pot hole infested bankhead highway they jump ship!!!
By Alvin
August 1, 2007 12:55 PM | Link to this
Strolling in all smooth’n’ish, like I ain’t just lost my best friend, clean cut dress to kill….walking up to the blog bar and ordering red Kool Aid in a wine glass…Slow slipping, while coolly eyeing the lovelies of WLB and head nodding the HIGHLY respected MLB
SUP Y’ALL
I am out peace!!
By MsUnderstood aka MsU
August 1, 2007 12:55 PM | Link to this
@Ctha1 Darling i talk the talk & have walk the walk just to get left behind when ole boy got well & back on his feet. I’m not saying that all guys are the same but i have ran into a few guys that said that want this & that out an ideal mate and then when they get it they nut up. MLB why is that??
By SeanJohnson3000
August 1, 2007 12:59 PM | Link to this
Sup…Double OG.Truth
By Jake
August 1, 2007 1:05 PM | Link to this
QC are we going to be alone in that storage room? I’ll take a Belevedere/Cran, or Remy/Cran; hellz gimme both, this stomach is made of steel.
By MsUnderstood aka MsU
August 1, 2007 1:05 PM | Link to this
@ MLB My Ideal mate is someone who:who believe in God, accept me & children, confident, book/street smart, sense of humore, clean, understanding, affectionate, honest, content, understanding & patient..
By Sexione
August 1, 2007 1:05 PM | Link to this
Truth whats up? I see that you have misinterpreted my words AGAIN!!! I won’t even bother to try to explain (no explanation needed), I’ll just say this, we were talking about dating, nothing more! And, hey, it is what it is! And what man is contributing during dating………..not a one!!! puuhhleeaassee…..but then we know your mentality
By CoCo
August 1, 2007 1:06 PM | Link to this
Hi Blog fam: As always you all are keeping me entertained. I don’t have much to add to the topic, just wanted to say hey…HEY.
By Sexione
August 1, 2007 1:09 PM | Link to this
MsU guuurrll, don’t get me started…..men are always talking about wanting the ride or die chick, but as soon as things are up and running, so is he!!! I’m willing to bet (again) that most men do this……….get a good woman who will stick by you thru thick and thin, and as sonn as the bad times are over, or he has lost the extra pounds, or has a few dollars in his pocket, blah blah blah, he is looking for an upgrade because he’s getting the attention (from other women) again! but of course none will admit to this
Truth I just thought about this………..how you gone come all up in here with that BS (my meter is sounding like a fire alarm) and then disappear……………typical man!!!
By M.
August 1, 2007 1:11 PM | Link to this
Afternoon bloggers.
I think honestly, men decide if they won’t a deeper connection with you if they realize that they aren’t losing a lot but gaining while they are with you (i.e., though I’m with you, I still feel like I have a life of my own, and there also there is a balance with us and our lives). You’re are an addition.
What matters most in dating is just respect for everyone’s time, lives, resources, and the quest to find a meaningful relationship. I think if everyone took this approach, we would not have such a treacherous dating scene.
What she should know about dating M. is: I am an outgoing guy. I have friends that are females that I will never touch. Also, you don’t have to smother me. Ill respect your time and life, please respect mine. Also, play your position because there’s fierce competition here so if you aren’t serious, we can both be better just finding something better. Also, if you’re the super busy type (you cant return a text message), let me know up front so neither of our time is wasted.
By Poppa Grande
August 1, 2007 1:11 PM | Link to this
Thanks Sexione.. There three F are in different proportions for every guy. If you find someone with whom you are compatible, the Fs are gonna work out trust me. Some “f” are wants and not needs. Its the “f” that are wants that can get a guy in trouble. As I said before, we are visually stimulated for the most part.
Sometimes people are just weak and vulnerable to temptation.
By Poppa Grande
August 1, 2007 1:19 PM | Link to this
Truth…letting me rest falls under being my friend in my book.
A real friend cares about my wellbeing.
For example:
I have had to tell my wife to slow down a time or two. She can get all caught up with her DST sisters, work, and other obligations and get going out of control. I have to remind her from time to time to get some rest.
She has done the same for me.
By Gorilla O aka "Tha Code Cracka"
August 1, 2007 1:21 PM | Link to this
@ Travis Women tend to expect men to have their stuff together more than men expect a woman to. im witcha my brotha. but i have to put some of the blame on us men. most women have high, sometimes astronomical, standards. physically if she sees a man looking somewhat bummy with no haircut, clothes not up to par, driving a ‘78 ford focus, and broke, she wont give him the time of day. but if us men see a woman in the same condition, with just a lil a$$ on her, we gone holla at her, instead of telling her to kick rocks.
By Twinkie
August 1, 2007 1:23 PM | Link to this
Poppa Grande You really have an excellent point of view. I am enjoying reading you.
By C tha 1
August 1, 2007 1:24 PM | Link to this
Ms U I couldn’t tell you why some dudes jump ship when the going gets good … it speaks alot towards their character. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again every body has a backbone, but some peoples’ backbone won’t let them stand straight up, know what I mean.
By Jake
August 1, 2007 1:27 PM | Link to this
Poppa Grande
You are sending some real insightful posts into the male psyche, don’t give them too much, they use it against us. You remind me of this guy who used give out T-shirts around here…LOL
Travis Cosigning that 12:42 posts. Its really simple, the dude is ultimately responsible for making sure evrybody eats and sleeps well. No exceptions!!
By Gorilla O aka "Tha Code Cracka"
August 1, 2007 1:28 PM | Link to this
Question to WLB. i see some of you have being a christian as on of your ideal traits in a man. so i want to know on the list of important traits in a man, where does being a christian fall in at? and what exactly does it mean to be a christian? just curious because that became a big issue with my ex…amongst other things.
By Tracie
August 1, 2007 1:33 PM | Link to this
Travis,
When a man see a women it is visual for you guys first. You proved it in your statement when you spoke about her A@@. But if the women is driving that sorry car and is out of shape and ugly you will tell her to kcik rocks also.
By NCGirlfromATL
August 1, 2007 1:33 PM | Link to this
Sup Truth. Your check bounced, mayne!
Get ‘em Sexione!! Just like Truth to walk into a room, fart and leave!
PoppaG First, welcome! Second, I feel you on the Fs. Of course, many men would say that a woman’s 3Fs are financing, f’in and food…in that order. Some women would agree too, lol!
Wassup CoCo!
By TRAVIS SMITH aka "Mr. Do Right"
August 1, 2007 1:36 PM | Link to this
@ MLB My Ideal mate is someone who:who believe in God, accept me & children, confident, book/street smart, sense of humore, clean, understanding, affectionate, honest, content, understanding & patient.. @ Ms. U Ideal is a strong WORD!!! waiting for that IDEAL MAN will have you single for a long time. If you meet a guy and one or of those characteristics are not met is he still worth your time? even though your not wanting that much, what if you cant find a man with all of those traits? WHATS NEXT!!!!!
By Poppa Grande
August 1, 2007 1:39 PM | Link to this
Thankx Twinkie..
My feeling on having our stuff together is this.
Sometimes the journey is much more fulfilling than the destination.
Much like that movie “Little Miss Sunshine”, they worked to get to a destination and went through all kinds of stuff to get the pagaent. However, when they got there, the destination was really a letdown for them. However, they were still rewarded as they were shown that they were a family that stuck together.
The same can be said about a person (Male or female) that has struggled to get what they have without a SO. The respect factor can really be missing if someone shows up after someone has attained some wealth.
I have friends that play in the all over the NFL, and they are approached by people (male and female) trying to get a piece of what they have earned. That can lead to the lack of respect.Without respect, there are gonna be some issues.
I’m not saying that its right but its what happens.
By NCGirlfromATL
August 1, 2007 1:42 PM | Link to this
but if us men see a woman in the same condition, with just a lil a$$ on her, we gone holla at her, instead of telling her to kick rocks.{
But Gorilla just b/c you might holla at her doesn’t mean you’ll make her your Mrs. The MLB has already established that there are cut-buddies, jump-offs, friends w/ benefits and wifeys. Are you going to make ole girl in the 79 Gremlin, working at Wal Mart, trying to feed her 3 kids on no child support your wife? Don’t act like women are the only ones who look for certain financial qualities in a mate! Shoot, you and Travis are always talking about a woman’s credit score…sounds to me like you guys are looking for the same thing we are…you’re just packaging it a little differently.
LMAO @ Jake trying to keep the MLB trade secrets…well, a secret! Leave Randyt alone! His t-shirts have come in handy on many occasions!
Heeeeeeey Randyt if you’re lurking!
By melo
August 1, 2007 1:44 PM | Link to this
@NCGirlfromATL,actually in the A, its financing,food and maybe fugging.They will play u untill playng’s gone outa bizness and ur cable is jacked! Atlanta is full of shark women, trust me..thats why the men are either thugz(its viewed as a positive here by the women) or playaz as well.
By Gorilla O aka "Tha Code Cracka"
August 1, 2007 1:48 PM | Link to this
I’m willing to bet (again) that most men do this……….get a good woman who will stick by you thru thick and thin, and as sonn as the bad times are over, or he has lost the extra pounds, or has a few dollars in his pocket, blah blah blah, he is looking for an upgrade because he’s getting the attention (from other women) again! SexiOne, SexiOne, SexiOne, are we at it again? and once again i have to diagree and put the bulk of that on women. why? because women crave attention more than men do. so if you have a women that was overweight and broke, as soon as she loses 30lbs, gets a little money, and starts getting some attention, she starts acting brand new. and yea i know, the only reason she is seeking attention elsewhere is because her SO isnt giving her a sufficient amount…yadi ya whoopti whoop
By Poppa Grande
August 1, 2007 1:50 PM | Link to this
Jake…I didn’t think that was telling them anything that was new.
I just think that they read too much Essence, Cosmo, and other crap that fills their head with all kinds of ideas. How to please you man with this or how to keep you man happy. blah, blah, blah.
Magazine companies know that females are verbally stimulated and we are visually stimulated (Hence the 5 Million different types of nudie mags behind the counter at the QT. Note that most of our mags don’t have many words in them….hmmm
I’m just of the Steve Harvey mentality. I just don’t think that we are complicated.
By SlimOne
August 1, 2007 1:51 PM | Link to this
Slim now waking up from her drunken stupor WhadImiss?
By Gorilla O aka "Tha Code Cracka"
August 1, 2007 1:58 PM | Link to this
@ Travis what if you cant find a man with all of those traits? WHATS NEXT!!!!! let me answer that my brotha. that will lead to fun filled weekends of The Lifetime Network,Ben and Jerry’s, and trying to convince everyone that in all of your 49 years you havent come across a good man.
By Poppa Grande
August 1, 2007 2:00 PM | Link to this
Sexione..I have to say that in Atlanta there, there are plenty of married women cheating. Its not limited to race. Don’t get me started on the Buckhead Bettys here. (Atlanta’s real life version of “Desperate Housewives”).
There are plenty of sistahs that cheat as well. Reasons differ. However, some women may just need more than their B.O.B. and a Rabbit. Their husband are giving it to them.
By Tazzee
August 1, 2007 2:03 PM | Link to this
Women just want the 3 S’s - security, sharing and sex. It’s pretty simple if you think about it…
Gorilla O for me, being a Christian means a personal relationship with Christ where you strive to be more like him. Nothing more.
By Gorilla O aka "Tha Code Cracka"
August 1, 2007 2:04 PM | Link to this
NCGirlfromATL, no I wouldnt make her into MY ol lady, but a lot of men will. see a man is easy to please, sometimes too easy. so whereas yall have a laundry list of qualities you gotta have in a man, we tend to have a shortlist (i.e. just a lil a$$ on her).
By Jake
August 1, 2007 2:05 PM | Link to this
Pop G
Nah bruh, its not new, they have heard before, but they use the info for evil…lol.
As for the Magazines, I have the slightest idea why women read something from another women about pleasing a man, she don’t know…its really kinda silly.
By Tazzee
August 1, 2007 2:12 PM | Link to this
Gorilla and Travis - did you guys even read MsU’s list, LOL? Please tell me what is outrageous about that list that she can’t find all that in a man? It’s not like she listed income and height requirements. Her stuff is the basics - but like Poppa said, we are verbally stimulated therefore she just used more words to describe what men might call a Friend.
By Sexione
August 1, 2007 2:13 PM | Link to this
Gorilla I knew you would say that………everything is not t!t for tat, or either/or, some things can and do go both ways. Yes women and men both lie, I will never try to debate who does this the most (that’s silly!). And yes, men and women both get the big head, who does this most?, again, I will not even attempt to debate that (it’s ridiculous). But what you fail to realize sweetie pie, is that I’m a woman, a heterosexual woman, so I can almost only speak on what men do as I do not date women, nor do I have BFFs…with the exception of maybe one……..and thats rare for me……….but anywho……..damned if you do, and damned if you don’t
By Gorilla O aka "Tha Code Cracka"
August 1, 2007 2:14 PM | Link to this
@ Jake As for the Magazines, I have the slightest idea why women read something from another women about pleasing a man, she don’t know…its really kinda silly. good point bruh!
By Mo (now known as Moeisha)
August 1, 2007 2:15 PM | Link to this
Hey All!! I see it crackin and poppin as usual in here!
Truth hey bey-bey! Glad you could pop in.
Gorilla O what up fellow Virgo! Mo dapping Gorilla O, on your comment about men being easy to please, each sex thinks they are easy to please. The bottomline is women verbalize more and men cut to the chase but it isnt as easy to please the other as it is made to seem. On surface you can have some commonalities but when you get to the meat of the issue, everybody is different and therefore not “easy” to please. Hence why relationships take work. I think what makes relationships seem easy is when you find someone that you are so compatible with that the relationship seems to flow on its own, no matter what.
By Poppa Grande
August 1, 2007 2:17 PM | Link to this
Tazzie….I really believe you are right. I can’t say that for certain because I have never been, nor am I planning to be a woman…lol
But it makes sense.
The one thing that my wife definitely knows aobut me is that I believe in keeping things simple. I tell myself to remember the KISS principle everyday. KISS means Keep It Simple Stupid. I direct this principle toward me when I am getting out of control or confusing myself.
By TRAVIS SMITH aka "Mr. Do Right"
August 1, 2007 2:20 PM | Link to this
@ NCGIRLFROMATL The reason I speak on credit so much is that “I messed mine up at 17 and it took 6 years to right that wrong And ill be dang if i will let someone else mess it up with their needs and wants!!!! @ TRACIE * Before you ever talked to a guy, What did you go off of? LOOKS. right? ok thats all we as men and women have to go off of before conversation. *@ Gorilla O YOU CRAZY, she got to have more thaa a$$ on her to please me. SHE HAS TO HAVE A BIG ONE!!!! While she is at home with her ben and jerrys will she be single by choice or because there no good men out their
By CoCo
August 1, 2007 2:20 PM | Link to this
NC hey girlie… O be honest with yourself some of you all have an extensive list of requirements Tazzee love your straight to the point response…nothing more.
By Tazzee
August 1, 2007 2:20 PM | Link to this
Jake most of the time those articles are based on interviews with men, so its not really what women are saying. In Essence - they even have the pictures and basic description of the guys they interviewed - so if dude is under 35 and/or unattractive, I don’t read his response….J/K.
By B N There
August 1, 2007 2:22 PM | Link to this
In my early-20’s I took a break from “committed” relationships. Informed every Sister of my mental mode to just have fun and concentrate on me - yeah selfish I know. At any rate, they either walked-away or could deal with. Except for Freda, she said she understood and was ok with it. But after giving up the “goods” and seeing I had not changed, she slashed the top on my convertible and threatened to kill me. Brother had to change residences. Lesson learned was regardless of how honest you are, not everyone can handle the truth even when you tell them. Peace…
By Bre
August 1, 2007 2:22 PM | Link to this
afternoon With the market up I have a hot minute….
I don’t know maybe if its the be the best woman you can be thing I believe or what. But I can say that Poppa Grande is talking some truth. I don’t mind at all taking care of the 3F’s at all, and I feel I should without trying to hubby a man. Overall I’m getting what I want, and I’m putting something in that I will get back in a sense maybe not on the same way but in some way. Plus I don’t mind having a black man walk around with his swagger tipsy because he knows what’s at home or where he is going, meaning a good woman that’s taking care of herself and him. In the end I’m going to handle my own because its on me if he is the benefit of it; all is well. As I always say this does not and will never apply to knuckleheads, those on the five finger rotation, or that back thumper. This is for that good man, do you alright most of the time man, even a man with some issues here and there but around for you man.
By Jewel
August 1, 2007 2:23 PM | Link to this
Sexione I am with you, but judging by the tone of some of your posts…have you been burned a few times? Or, are these comments only related to today’s topic?
Poppa Grande Is that another way of calling yourself “Big Daddy?” LOL! Your posts are truthful and insightful. By the way, Essence does include the male point of view on most occasions. Can’t speak for Cosmo.
By Staceye
August 1, 2007 2:24 PM | Link to this
Sexione Your 12:45 post was right on point. I could not hav esaid it better my self….so I’ll just co-sign!
By Mo (now known as Moeisha)
August 1, 2007 2:26 PM | Link to this
Jake & Gorilla O I read a lot of magazines, but I dont take the articles to seriously when they mention things like how to please a man. What I have done though is to ask my best friend (who is a married man) and some other male friends what they think about those articles: true or not, what was left out, what should be added, etc. But the articles are just suggestions, they arent law or fool-proof. The only way to please your man is to find out what pleases him! on side note though, some of those suggestions do work, just depends on how you use the suggestion! LOL
By Staceye
August 1, 2007 2:27 PM | Link to this
Poppa Grande you are oh so right about the masks. Truth how ya doin’? We miss you in Blogsville.
By Gorilla O aka "Tha Code Cracka"
August 1, 2007 2:30 PM | Link to this
SexiOne, you just make sure you make it to the meet and greet. i think we need to have us a lil round table. then i can get a better feel of where you’re coming from and why. and you can do the same for me. its not that im going t** for tat or im disagreeing just because, its just how i feel about it. i still lub you though.
By Sexione
August 1, 2007 2:30 PM | Link to this
Poppa Grande I agree, there are plenty of people (male & female, married, single, etc.) that cheat. Did I say something about married people and didn’t realize it? hmmmmm Or did I say something about a certain race cheating and didn’t realize it? I didn’t think so, but yes, I agree, and the reasons are everything under the sun! I’m still trying to figure out how we got to married and race………. Oh well, I do agree with ya.
By TRAVIS SMITH aka "Mr. Do Right"
August 1, 2007 2:32 PM | Link to this
@ Ms. U Are You Single?
By Sexione
August 1, 2007 2:34 PM | Link to this
Jewel guurl, live long enough and we all will be burned at some point. I have been but it’s been a looonnngg time, so my posts are to todays topic only! It’s all good……….lol
By abc
August 1, 2007 2:35 PM | Link to this
Now Gorilla, how many definitions of ‘Christian’ can there be?
By Staceye
August 1, 2007 2:38 PM | Link to this
Sexione gurl I’a co-sign yet again…this time on your 1:09 post! Get outta my head! LOL They start to smell their funk as my granny says and then they want to go after the new coochie that’s being thrown at them. Then the go to find out in the words of the late great Biggie….it was all a dream! Then they wanna try and come back like high top fades…but if the woman is smart she will chop him off!
By Sexione
August 1, 2007 2:41 PM | Link to this
Gorilla I’ll be there………and you know I wuv you too!!!!
Y’all should know by now that when I post I shoot straight from the hip (not rude, just direct). I don’t have a lot of time so I give it straight, no chaser, no time to dress it up or sugarcoat it………and besides, reading words leaves lots of room for interpretation (in many different ways). Saturday will be fuuuunnnnnnn!!
I’m outtie, have a wonderful evening!
By MsUnderstood aka MsU
August 1, 2007 2:43 PM | Link to this
Hey yall I was gone to a meeting.Sexi1 thanks for having my back.Travius& Gorilla O i will get back with yall. I gotta go. Work 1st!!
By Staceye
August 1, 2007 2:44 PM | Link to this
Tazzee Women just want the 3 S’s - security, sharing and sex Hallelujah! I agree….
By Gorilla O aka "Tha Code Cracka"
August 1, 2007 2:50 PM | Link to this
@ abc Now Gorilla, how many definitions of ‘Christian’ can there be? evidently a couple because you have people that are dedicated to the good lord and live that type of lifestyle and call themselves christians. on the other hand you have people who arent living right, doing more dirt than i do, and only turn to the lord when they fall on hard times or when its convenient for them, and they call themselves christians. so i guess they would be considered ‘fair-weather’ christians.
By T-Mango
August 1, 2007 2:53 PM | Link to this
…T-Mango stops by the blog party all late and ish with a glass of Merlot in hand…
Good afternoon to my sisters of the WLB. What’s up MLB?
I don’t have time to read through all of the posts unfortunately. But, what would I like a man to know about dating me?…I’ll give up two.
1.) I fight hard, but I love harder 2.) If you don’t stimulate my mind first, it will difficult for you to stimulate anything else…
If I had liquid courage or not…Well, since I just read J.L. King’s book last weekend (that book really got under my skin)I’d probably ask a man if he’s been sexually intimate with another man on the front end instead of assuming he’s most likely straight based on appearances/public lifestyle. Then, I’d ask him if he knows his HIV status or if he’d be willing to take a test with his partner if the relationship was becoming serious. In other words, I’d have this discussion to see where his head is at earlier in the game…(somebody said it was “keep it real Wednesday). There it is. Get mad if you want to but that 70% of new HIV/AIDS diagnosis is real among women. And the percentage is not going down.
Have a great day bloggers.
Y’all be easy…T-M is out.*
By NCGirlfromATL
August 1, 2007 2:59 PM | Link to this
CoCo I agree that women have lists of requirements. I’ve said before on this blog that my list has gotten considerably shorter and more generalized over the years. For instance, “Must have college degree, job in corp America, and drive a car that’s no more than 8 yrs old,” has become, “Must have a job, and a car.” LOLOL!!
Travis I understand your credit check thing. I’m just saying that men try to act like they don’t have any requirements, when clearly you do. But, it’s cool! Do yo thang!
By Poppa Grande
August 1, 2007 3:02 PM | Link to this
Hello Jewell…Yes….Poppa Grande is kinda spanglish way of saying Big Daddy. I was a spanish minor in college. However, Big Poppa really was a nickname of mine. I am 6 foot 7 inches tall and 285 lbs. So people really called me that. Guys called just called by BIGS for short. I don’t want any guy calling me Big Poppa…lol
Staceye…since we are visually stimulated those masks and pushup bras are almost the same as us verbally telling you ladies untruths about ourselves. Both are used to cover things that we don’t want others to see.
Sexione…I’m sorry, speaking of married is a habit. I was saying that its not just males that are unfaithful even in the married world. Race thing was also a reflex. It wasn’t anything that you did. It was me.
By Gorilla O aka "Tha Code Cracka"
August 1, 2007 3:03 PM | Link to this
Staceye Then they wanna try and come back like high top fades. based on that analogy, a dude might as well hang up trying to get back with you, ‘cause high top fades aint never coming back. lol
By Tazzee
August 1, 2007 3:09 PM | Link to this
Gorilla Shoot, I could call myself a man…
By Gorilla O aka "Tha Code Cracka"
August 1, 2007 3:13 PM | Link to this
T-Mango, yea it is KEEP IT REAL WEDNESDAY. and i really cant blame you for your comment. ive been asked a couple of times if i was straight. and seeing as im straight as an arrow, it offended me at first. but after thinking about it and just realizing that there are a lot of in the closet brotha’s, i wouldnt trip, i respect it. and i definitely wouldnt trip off the HIV testing. you just never know until you find out.
By abc
August 1, 2007 3:15 PM | Link to this
Aha. The previous series of Sunday School lessons we were doing in our adult class was about ‘Authentic Christianity’. Everyone’s pretty familiar with the ‘Sunday-only Christian’ syndrome. Current series is ‘When Godly People Do Un-Godly Things’. It can happen to anyone!
Folks can get pretty fuzzy about their requirements of Christianity. Spiritual compatibility is a must, I think.
By For Real
August 1, 2007 3:18 PM | Link to this
What up Blog Fam. Just popping in for a minute.
Must people don’t want to know the truth. They just want you to confirm what they believe. If the truth doesn’t confirm what they believe then you are the one with issues.
Men lie to women to get the sex bc it’s logical and it works.
Not trying to start he vs she thang but why do women feel they are the only ones that get to choose?
Men and women have a different definition of RELATIONSHIP. I keep reading Not Marriage from some of the WLB but the MLB know that’s exactly what you mean. If not, then why all the restrictions of marriage.
What I want women to know about me. I don’t have time for a serious relationship. No I will not change my mind no matter what you do or how good of a woman you think you are. I am not the one that hurt you. No you can’t meet my kids. I don’t have to lie to you.
By Staceye
August 1, 2007 3:21 PM | Link to this
Gorilla getting back with a dude that hurts you is like swalling somebody’s backwash after they swig down your Pepsi! “Uh….you can have it….all of a sudden I am not so thirsty anymore”!
By SeanJohnson3000
August 1, 2007 3:25 PM | Link to this
cosigning 4reals post..
By MissUnderstood
August 1, 2007 3:32 PM | Link to this
Hey Fam!!!!! It’s been a long time since I’ve ventured here. There are a lot of newbies, to me that is, and todays topic caught my eye.
By NCGirlfromATL
August 1, 2007 3:37 PM | Link to this
T-Mango breakin’ dooooooown! The HIV thing is so important! And it amazes me how many men and women still don’t want to have that convo. Avoid it if you want to…but the odds aren’t in your favor!
Gotta run…nite all!
By Jewel
August 1, 2007 3:37 PM | Link to this
For Real You know bullet #3 confirms bullet #1…about you. Why do men use their logic, as it is called, to contradict what a woman says? That is one of the biggest mistakes and hindrances to male/female synthesis in relationships. Listen to the woman. I mean, if you cannot take a woman’s word for what it is, just get a blowup doll. Women do not have restrictions. We have “preferences.” You have them too.
By Mo (now known as Moeisha)
August 1, 2007 3:39 PM | Link to this
For Real I don’t have time for a serious relationship. No I will not change my mind no matter what you do or how good of a woman you think you are. I am not the one that hurt you. No you can’t meet my kids. I don’t have to lie to you I am co-signing this and agreeing wholeheartedly cause this is Mo all the way!!!! just make that, I dont care how good of a man you are!!! Mo now ^5 For Real
By Gorilla O aka "Tha Code Cracka"
August 1, 2007 3:40 PM | Link to this
Tazzee, not sure i got your point. explain
By For Real
August 1, 2007 3:43 PM | Link to this
Oh and one other thing I want women to know about me. If your CT doesn’t measure up to Slim’s Momma, then get to steppin.
Slim you know I could come on the blog and not fugg with you
By SeanJohnson3000
August 1, 2007 3:43 PM | Link to this
@ D4L…whats your email address..
By QC
August 1, 2007 3:44 PM | Link to this
Hey Miss U how are you girl!!!!
By QC
August 1, 2007 3:45 PM | Link to this
Great post For Real
By SexyCool
August 1, 2007 3:47 PM | Link to this
my two cents…in a perfect world…“you ain’t gotta lie to kick it”…but alas…in this inperfect world…most often…you do…and they do too…
the solution to the problem requires more thought and effort than my feeble mind is capable of expending this afternoon…
By Rondo
August 1, 2007 3:48 PM | Link to this
Date someone from this blog? Surely you jest Diva. I see that you guys never fail me, posting more and more pathetic standards for the Holy Grail in life, meaning “love” for those who are of the moronic bragade of assumers. When I did date, every woman failed my first question when I thought they maybe worthy of a serious realtionship. That question being, how many partners have you had sex with? Most of the time that is a no answer question, which translates to me as alot or they told me their number which my jaw dropped especially the triple didgits. I am very honest about my number but most women assume I’m lieing which is 5. Imo in this day in age majority of women are just too skanky for my taste, if you have had sex with more men than you have fingers go ahead and give yourself the title of Skank and don’t whine about not being able to find a Nice Guy, cause I honestly believe you do not deserve one……you have allready had your fun. Being 36 and only being with 5 women sexually my whole life, I feel I have had my fill of women and there is no need for them in my life any more.
By MissUnderstood
August 1, 2007 3:48 PM | Link to this
Relationships aren’t difficult, people make them difficult.
The fobias and issues you carry from mate to mate fester and build up.
This isn’t just a woman thing myth, it’s a human myth.
Similar circumstances will trigger the emotions.
By Deeva4Life
August 1, 2007 3:50 PM | Link to this
seanjohnson3000 puridee7@yahoo.com; check your e-mail.
By MissUnderstood
August 1, 2007 3:50 PM | Link to this
Hey QC!!! How are you honey?!
Ok I just noticed something new. Duh…. I am slow Did someone get rid of the email addresses?
By SlimOne
August 1, 2007 3:51 PM | Link to this
For Real The CT, is growing!!!! WTF do i do?
By For Real
August 1, 2007 3:52 PM | Link to this
Ok I wasn’t going to come back on until I read this by Jewel
Why do men use their logic, as it is called, to contradict what a woman says?
Geico Caveman Ummmmmm Whattttt??? When I speak of logic as it pertains to sex from a female, it is illogical for man to tell a female on the first, second, third, 948 date that he wants to put on some goggles, forearm pads, some knee high football sock, and fugg the living s** out of you. Chances of sex with female = 1%. Tell a female you are beautiful, you are not like any of these other females, I respect you, you are type of women I can see myself marrying. Chance of sex with female = 98%. So logically speaking which method is best for having sex with a female Jewel?
*Oh and I do have the goggles, forearm pads, and the knee high football socks just in case you are interested.
By MissUnderstood
August 1, 2007 3:58 PM | Link to this
Wow Rondo…… that’s too, I don’t have the words.
Why would u think the answer to the question was any of your business?
Im not being a smart behind, but IMO a person who judges others may have unresolved issues within themselves and I have to wonder what makes them the authority to decide how one should feel about themselves or accept that judgement as a final answer?
Being chosen by a potential mate is an honor for both people, and will only be appreciated and given the proper respect if it’s done with sincerety and not an agenda.
By msdyscreet
August 1, 2007 4:00 PM | Link to this
Rondo feel I have had my fill of women and there is no need for them in my life any more are you gay? I mean, I’m trying to figure out what would make you feel that you don’t have a need for women anymore. And it’s cool if you’re 36 and you’ve only been with 5 females (sexually) in your life…but drop the holier than thou act. That’s played.
By MissUnderstood
August 1, 2007 4:00 PM | Link to this
Dang, ok, I know I’ve been gone a while. Who is Bella and where is Laney?
By Staceye
August 1, 2007 4:03 PM | Link to this
WTF???? Rondo unless your name is Jesus Christ and your Pop’s is God….you have NO right to judge anyone! Not meaning to get Bibical…but let ye without sin cast the first stone”. Being that you have been with 5 women…all of them constitute sin! So where the hell do you get off coming on the blog running off at the mouth being the hypocritcal azz that you are. You probably have only been with 5 women because they were either blind, drunk, stupid or just plain ole desperate! Life experiences is what makes you who you are. So put that in your pipe and smoke it! And I hope you choke on it!
By Tazzee
August 1, 2007 4:04 PM | Link to this
Gorilla you mentioned folks that call themselves Christians but do all types of things that are not Christ-like. I’m not one to state whether someone is a Christian or not, but you know them by their fruit. So essentially I was saying I could call myself a man - but if you check my ‘fruit’ LOL, that’s funny now that I think about it - you will find that I am indeed a woman.
By abc
August 1, 2007 4:05 PM | Link to this
Overall, by the time they’re in their mid to late 40’s, men will report 31 or more sex partners, women 9 or so. ‘Course, some are lying. Women will say less, men will say more.
I’ve read other statistics that state that 17% of women report having over 15 sexual partners in their lifetime, 29 or 30% of men report the same. Among African Americans, the figures are 29% for women, 50% for men.
Maybe you’d like a nun, Rondo?
By Jewel
August 1, 2007 4:07 PM | Link to this
Humph. For Real You are apparently suffering from some inadequacies to think you must pamper and coddle a woman for sex. I assume that he wants to put on some goggles, forearm pads, some knee high football sock, and fugg the living s* out of you.* is an exaggeration? Part of your blog humor? Or is this the real For Real? Is sex your only goal, or the only thing you are capable of having successfully, by your definition of success, with a woman?
By MissUnderstood
August 1, 2007 4:09 PM | Link to this
lol@ For Real…. Well now you can get more bees with honey than u can with poop.
By MissUnderstood
August 1, 2007 4:11 PM | Link to this
lmao@ Tazzee, hey ma long time no see. How have you been?
By Page1908
August 1, 2007 4:12 PM | Link to this
LOL @ Staceye about Rondo! Hahaa man, that’s funny!
SJ are you still on yahoo IM?
By For Real
August 1, 2007 4:12 PM | Link to this
Quick Slim lift up your skirt and pull down your panties. Now place one foot on your desk and press your face and breast up agianst the wall. Now arch your back and push out your butt. I will have to perform an emergency mouth to CT procedure. At first you will feel a strong pull followed by a gentle yet consistant tugging motion on your CT. You will also feel warm moist air flowing over your CT. Followed by a warm, moist, and firm apparatus lapping your CT. You will hear a smacking sound but don’t be alarmed. This sound will help reduce the size of your CT.
By Deeva4Life
August 1, 2007 4:17 PM | Link to this
SeanJohnson3000 mail call
By Gorilla O aka "Tha Code Cracka"
August 1, 2007 4:20 PM | Link to this
LOL, Tazzee, i gotcha. im bout to get up out of this bia, bia! ill holla at yall good people tomorrow!
By MissUnderstood
August 1, 2007 4:22 PM | Link to this
Hey page!!!! Long time no see. How are you?
By Poppa Grande
August 1, 2007 4:24 PM | Link to this
To all: Have safe ride home and a good evening..
By Jake
August 1, 2007 4:24 PM | Link to this
Well dayumm For Real, I just got back in and walked into your posts. I see you like to wear your Earmuffs too…LOL
abc those stats sound about right.
By MissUnderstood
August 1, 2007 4:25 PM | Link to this
I see things are still the same here. LOL For Real….. (shaking my head) you are silly.
By SeanJohnson3000
August 1, 2007 4:26 PM | Link to this
@ Page1980…IM is seanjohnson
By SlimOne
August 1, 2007 4:26 PM | Link to this
For Real LOLOLOL! I can’t even mess with it today. You threw me off guard with that one bruh. Dayum! Where did you say you’re going to be at 5:01???
By MissUnderstood
August 1, 2007 4:30 PM | Link to this
fam I am out…… next time i must join the convo earlier… have a safe trip home…..
By Page1908
August 1, 2007 4:33 PM | Link to this
Hey MissU! I was looking for you the other day and I guess there is another blogger with your same name? LOL…hey send me your contact info…my addy is pageantgirl_1908@yahoo.com
By SeanJohnson3000
August 1, 2007 4:33 PM | Link to this
@ AKA1908..my bad..seanjohnson3000 is the IM
By Tazzee
August 1, 2007 4:35 PM | Link to this
Hey MissU - umm yeah you are late, LOL. Laney went to further her education, Bella’s her replacement and the email function has been gone for quite some time.
By Page1908
August 1, 2007 4:36 PM | Link to this
LOL SJ for saying 1980! now mean mugging! Ok I’ll add you tonight.
By DuShawn
August 1, 2007 4:36 PM | Link to this
* Rondo* “Being 36 and only being with 5 women sexually my whole life”…I doubt if that was by choice. From the tone of your post, I have a feeling the reason your sexual encounters with the opposite sex are so few and far between is because of consistent rejection not personal selectiveness.
By melo
August 1, 2007 4:36 PM | Link to this
@Rondo, u right man for having ur own standards.Forget what Staceye says because she may not be ur type and maybe her # is has gone overlimit and she is just feeling rejected like a leper. But those are ur standards, and nobody has a right to question them. Why would a woman want 8..9..10..10+ partners anyway before they settle on on. Same with men.. Which man wants to marry a woman whose puddsy has lost most of its DNA!!
By Staceye
August 1, 2007 4:50 PM | Link to this
Melo so we as wome are supposed to be ok with a man have 60 or more partners….but a woman should only have less than 5. This is some double standards shyt! Newsflash…if every woman was that way you horn dogs would be playing with Palmala and her 5 sisters because you would have no women to get down with so hello…And for your info my number is not high nor am I feeling rejected so please void your degree you think you got in Psychology because obviously it was given by mistake. Sure it’s ok to have standards…it’s something wrong with you if you don’t. It’s better to have a few partners to know what you like and don’t like before you marry and be unsatisfied and hence for cheating takes place because the spouse can not handle their business. I am not saying sleep with the entire eastern Seaboard….but at least test the waters 3 or 4 times.
By DuShawn
August 1, 2007 4:50 PM | Link to this
Melo I agree, if those are Rondo’s standards, more power to him. I just find it odd that as an adolecsent and younger man he made such morally conscious decisions. I mean, I slept with five women during the tenth grade.
By melo
August 1, 2007 4:59 PM | Link to this
@Staceye,Same with men, i said that!!
Goodnite sweetie.
By Tazzee
August 1, 2007 5:00 PM | Link to this
night all!
By Wise Diva
August 1, 2007 5:07 PM | Link to this
Great discussion everyone! I know I learned a few things :) Have a good night