Misadventures in Atlanta

By SlimOne

June 25, 2007 8:31 AM | Link to this

Good Morning ALL MLB, WLB members, and freelancers

Laney We will surely miss you but hope you still pop in from time to time. I wish you all the luck in Grad School.

On Topic Yes I have chosen at times to put dating on the back burner for various reasons. I might’ve needed time to breathe and get some other life components together, whether it was school, a job, or finances. Yes it is sort nice to start a new chapter with a clean slate but there are times when having that special someone in your corner helps alleviate some of your concerns, fears, discomfort, etc. However, I think if the change involved you moving away from a SO could be equally stressful if not more. Sometimes it’s a catch 22.

Can you choose to avoid dating, or will it come and find you anyway? Yes you can choose not to date but that isn’t going to prevent guys/girls from trying to talk to you or want to date you. As strange as it is, the times you’re taking a time out are the times when you get more propositions.

By Lady J

June 25, 2007 8:35 AM | Link to this

Morning Good People!!! Laney wish you well and it was a pleasure to participate on your blog!!! Best Wishes!

By M.

June 25, 2007 8:36 AM | Link to this

Hey Laney. First, congratulations on your upcoming ventures! I was in a similar situation when I moved to Atlanta from Chicago. I was not really trying to meet or date anyone. As you said, I was focusing on myself, my new job, my friends I was leaving, how I could make new ones, what part of town to live, etc. But anyways, the key is to take your time and have fun in spite of what’s happening. Question, I know you said Bella would take the reins from you, but I was wondering whatever happened to the single guy? I just thought it was interesting to see the male/female point of view of dating in Atlanta. Best wishes with everything Laney!

By GA.man AKA "Mr. Entertainment

June 25, 2007 8:47 AM | Link to this

Ok Laney…since i never gave you one…..here it is Riiiiippppp for that long behind post…..lolololo

Hey enjoy Grad school…do you….but i wsh you nothing but success and happiness…..

I believe I can say this for the entire MLB we will Miss you

Slim i got the Movie preview for **1408….coming in the next hour or so…

By MusingLee

June 25, 2007 8:49 AM | Link to this

Morn’in All,

Laney congrats, I hope you will check in from time to time. Good Luck!

Musing now thumps M. in the head for mentioning single guy…

By JJ

June 25, 2007 8:52 AM | Link to this

I too put dating on the back burner in order to raise my child. I am just now getting back into the swing of things, now that she is older. It’s tough to be my age, and get back into the dating pool. I love my independance, but I would love to be part of a ‘couple’. You know, have a companion to go out to dinner with, go to movies, lounge around, hit the lake, travel with, etc. It gets pretty lonely after awhile, but I like myself, so it isn’t too bad.

The problem is, I don’t know where to look for eligible men. Bars are definately out of the question. I’ve just started “putting myself out there” but haven’t been too successful in finding a guy to go out with. I have two dogs and hit several different parks around my area with them. Oh well, time is on my hands…….I’ve been single this long, I don’t mind waiting a little longer for Mr. Right….I know he is out there, I just have to find him.

Any suggestions……?????

By Sexione

June 25, 2007 9:00 AM | Link to this

Goodmorning!!

Sexi hair flip to the WLB and full body hugs to the MLB

Laney We will miss you, but definitely wish you well!!! Good luck….and please don’t scare me anymore than I already am about Financial Accounting!! lol I will be taking it soon in Banking School (going for my Banking and Finance Diploma)……..and I’m already like huh? Let us pray over it together……Amen!! lololol

I moved dating down a few notches on my list of priorities a good while back. My focus is on my child, and whatever’s left over (yea, right! lol) is for me and my endeavors. If I happen to meet that someone during the process, well maybe…….but dating, I can take it or leave it right now.

By SlimOne

June 25, 2007 9:01 AM | Link to this

Gaman My two cousins went to see 1408 and they both said they didn’t think it was good. So i may have to wait until this hits BlockBuster before I see it.

By Raqi

June 25, 2007 9:04 AM | Link to this

Congrats Laney. I hope everything works out for you. Wishing you the best.

(Have you ever been in a situation like mine, where you consciously chose to make dating a lower priority? What were the circumstances? How long did it last? What other things were you putting at the top of your agenda? Can you choose to avoid dating, or will it come and find you anyway?)

To answer the above questions:

Yes we probably all have at sometime or the other. After dating The Nature Guy (which was close to 3 years after Whitebread) I was really bummed out. He was a good guy but he drained so much out of me until it became impossible to be with him while taking care of two kids and actually having a life. So from that point I first decided that I would not date for a year. I would take time to re-energize and focus on what was important. The welfare of my boys. But about 6 months after making that decision I was introduced to the most awesome man ever, Randy. That never went anywhere because we were just in two different places. After that I went on a few dead end dates and then just decided I was done with all the dating mess for good. For two years plus not one date. Not one ounce of male companionship…which was fine…because during this time I really started to come up in life. I made some life changing decisions that paid off better than I could have ever imagined.

I still socialized but that was about it. Good things were happening but there was still that occasional aggravation that comes along with raising kids and making things happen as they needed. I would still get worn out mentally and emotionally. These were the times when my dad would step in and take the kids fishing or something for the weekend to allow some time to myself. (I have the greatest dad).

Some of you have heard this so I won’t go into too many details…but anyway one Saturday afternoon my kids were with my father, it was raining, I was pooped, but decided I would get errands done while I had the free time. I was doing my month household shopping and ran into the guy that I never would have thought was meant to be.

That’s my “Starting Over” chronicle.

By Cassie

June 25, 2007 9:07 AM | Link to this

Good luck, girl! Put dating on the back burner and yourself on the front, and everything will work out just fine!

By Mo (now known as Moeisha)

June 25, 2007 9:10 AM | Link to this

Morning ALL!! Mo sliding back in to work after a great vacation…too bad it had to end!

Hair flip to the WLB and soft kisses and a flirtatious wink to the MLB

Laney Best Wishes to you and we will miss you! Pop in and let us know how you are doing!

I will comment on topic later, I’m still trying to recoup from the vacation..

By M.

June 25, 2007 9:21 AM | Link to this

@ MusingLee

I never said he was good or bad. Just a thought :)

By T-Mango

June 25, 2007 9:27 AM | Link to this

Good morning to all of the WLB and MLB

First, Laney good luck to you!!

Have you ever been in a situation like mine, where you consciously chose to make dating a lower priority? What were the circumstances? What other things were you putting at the top of your agenda? Yes, I have been in that position in the past and I am veering in that direction again. I was thinking about this pretty heavily as I was camped out at home this weekend. I even took down my profile on one of the dating sites as a result of my “me time” this weekend.

The primary reason this time is that I need to finish writing my poetry book this year. It has been a work in progress off and on for a while now, and is about 55% complete. My goal is to have it published by the end of 2007.

Certainly, my romantic liasons as of late have given me plenty of inspiration for my writing(both good and not so good). So, I’ve been channeling it into my work. That’s why it’s so important to me to have a man that is supportive of me creatively, as well as, other levels…(that’s been difficult to find).

So, starting over to me means that you are growing and continuing to seek out truth as you self-define it. From a relationship standpoint, I have accepted that “whatever is meant to be will be.” In the meantime, you gotta keep movin’ and achieve purpose in life-

By Lady Dark w/Dimples

June 25, 2007 9:41 AM | Link to this

Good Morning Everyone!

Congrats Laney!

Do you, like me, prefer to start new chapters of your life with a clean slate, or do you like the security of having a relationship already taken care of when you are dealing with lots of other uncertainty

This is a mixed question for me…although I love my man dearly I am starting a new phase in my life. I am preparing my exit out of corporate America and into the world of self employment. As I prepare for this awesome venture I encounter mix emotions along the path. There are times when I am guilt ridden because I feel like I’m neglecting my man by being so absorbed in the preparation phase…then there are times when I am so glad that he’s there for support.

I wouldn’t leave him for anything, but I think I start to feel more insecure…like I’m opening the door for someone else to step in. Of course he assures me that he understands and support me….but part of me just can’t help but wonder….

By purplepassion

June 25, 2007 9:51 AM | Link to this

CONGRATS to you Laney on your venture.

Good morning Blogmates I will lurk awhile on this one, seems like starting over has been been my middle name as of lately.

By Laney

June 25, 2007 10:02 AM | Link to this

morning all! thanks so much for your kind wishes. of course I will be stopping by whenever I can to hear what is going on back home in the ATL! congrats to all of you who are going through transitions as well — Lady Dark, self employment is very exciting and liberating!

By Raqi

June 25, 2007 10:11 AM | Link to this

@TMango ”…I have accepted that “whatever is meant to be will be.”

I agree with that statement now in my life because I believe fate puts us in certain situations and places at certain times. But I still believe that we have to take advantage of what has been laid out for us. I guess we should always believe that the possibility is always there, in every life situation, rather than trying to dictate to fate what is and is not protocol.

You know…I have asked my marido about his take on the day that he and I got together. He says that it could have been avoided because it was meant to be. So I asked him when he invited me to lunch that day was it his intention to get with me and he says it was not. We were long time friends and he saw that I was exhausted and just wanted to do something nice for me. You do know what I asked next…so when did you decide that that day was the day. He said he never decided that. He says that was my choice. Not that he had never thought about it in the past, but what happened that day he says was strictly on me. Huh? I NEVER once asked him to have sex with me. LOL What in the heck was he imagining? The fact that I was obviously hornier than a three headed unicorn and sitting there venting all of my cares and concerns to him, a close and dear friend, could not have been a clue to him that I needed release. Couldn’t have been. He feels the fact that when he called me later that evening and I accepted his call I opened the door for him to chose me. Was it meant to be? Hmmm?

By SeanJohnson3000

June 25, 2007 10:16 AM | Link to this

Sup Blog…Good Luck Zaney

I applaud the females who took time off dating to raise/spend time with their kids…thats is a very unselfish gesture..Now i have never totally removed myself from dating.I have needs…What i have done was date casually and tell females i am not looking for anything serious. I have done this for many reasons..from focusing most of my free time being a good father to trying better myself professionally or spiritually…Life is all about growth and its something u will always continue to do in different aspects..I have learned that sometimes you have to date “lite” that way u wont bring any unnecessary baggage with you.

By Raqi

June 25, 2007 10:19 AM | Link to this

Correction: “He says that it could not have…”

Doing too many things at one time.

By GA.man AKA "Mr. Entertainment

June 25, 2007 10:21 AM | Link to this

LDD i took that step..working for myself…it is hard at first but when you get going….Watch Out…it is worth every headache you will have….trust me i went on my first two week vacation this year..it was wonderful…..keep pushing…keep your head up

By Blatino aka BMW aka BLT

June 25, 2007 10:35 AM | Link to this

Whatup Blogfam!!! Hennessy toast to the Magna Lambda Beta’s, and a lil nod to my WLB’s.

This topic’s hittin a little close to home.

By Lady Dark w/Dimples

June 25, 2007 10:38 AM | Link to this

Thanks GA.man! What seems to be the hardest part right now are the doubters…family and friends…those who say don’t leave your cushion job, do it part-time…But I truly believe you have to give it your all in order to be successful!

By T-Mango

June 25, 2007 10:38 AM | Link to this

@Raqi I agree with the entire 1st paragraph of your post. I do believe in destiny and fate as well-

I think the forces at work in you meeting your husband will always be an unknown because the universe operates in its own way and on its own terms. It’s a realm that we weren’t meant to fully understand, but were meant to allow ourselves to experience. Just my .02 cents-

The important thing is that in light of you being in a place where you had things to vent about at that time, something was in sync which created that special moment of connection. The rest, as they say is history. Nice story:-)

By Officer Musirello

June 25, 2007 10:40 AM | Link to this

Patrolling the blog on the lookout for repeat long post offenders

JJ You should hang out in places guys like going…Football games, baseball games, basketball games, strip clubs, sports bars, electonic stores, music concerts, the gym, BBQ joints….If desparate also try local courthouses, strip clubs, waffle house, Fuddruckers, gas station restrooms….If really desperate try strip clubs, prison penpals, illegal street racing, local church, and party chat lines.

By SlimOne

June 25, 2007 10:42 AM | Link to this

5 Days and counting until my Vacation!

Anybody ever been to B.E.D.S in Miami?

By GA.man AKA "Mr. Entertainment

June 25, 2007 10:47 AM | Link to this

LDD use your haters as MOTIVATION I did and now those same people are coming round acting like I am a ATM…oh heck haw!!!!!….

But you do it..and it will be fine…trust me it is worth it…and hey you never know….where it will lead you….if you ever need anything hit me up and if i can help…i will manswellp@yahoo.com

By SlimOne

June 25, 2007 10:50 AM | Link to this

SGT. SlimGoody now pulling OfficerMusirello over and giving him verbal warning for using ‘stip club’ over the legal limit allowed for one post

By SeanJohnson3000

June 25, 2007 10:50 AM | Link to this

@ Musing..lol…you covered all grounds..lmao

By Lady J

June 25, 2007 10:51 AM | Link to this

Great Post SJ!

By GA.man AKA "Mr. Entertainment

June 25, 2007 10:54 AM | Link to this

Movie of the week

1408

now at first i didn’t want to see this but i had to because i have to be fair to all movies and my loyal viewers…lol

For the most part i think Stephen King did his thing in this movie and if you have seen anything he has done you know what to expect. This movie is about a writer who goes around the country looking for the scarist places..hotels, graveyards ect. ect.

well he gets a postcard that tells him NOT to go to this room, and as you know he goes anyway…..well this story starts strong because of the intense feel you get from it and it carries itself throught out the movie….this one will have you shaken your head….dropping popcorn…and maybe spilling your drink…it was worth the price of admission(If you like scary movies) the ending is very,very,very crazy….

I gave this movieDrumroll please……3 stars out of 5

it does have a couple of slow parts….but you wont mind…remember the ending is very crazy…go see it and you should enjoy

That’s my report….Next movie is Evan Almighty until this is what’s at the Movies and I am GaMan doing what i do..so you wont have to

By T-Mango

June 25, 2007 11:03 AM | Link to this

@LDD (on 10:38AM). You call them “doubters”…I call them “haters” or “the opposition”. I have them too. In the past this used to make me upset. But, it doesn’t anymore.

I’ve come to understand that “haters” see strengths/qualities/talents in you that they wish they’d been given or they lack the courage to act upon. In you, they probably see your apparent drive and the fact that you are a risk-taker among other things. These are all positives. Brush your shoulders off, sister! Don’t doubt yourself-

By Laney

June 25, 2007 11:08 AM | Link to this

Blatino, please elaborate on why it’s close to home!!

By SeanJohnson3000

June 25, 2007 11:22 AM | Link to this

@ DarkDimples…what i have learned is…some people “lack” vision..and what you see..your dreams..visions..things u want out of life they cant/dont see…That doesnt mean you have to classify all of them as haters..Most are just scary folks they have always depended on someone or a certain scruture..and with out that are helpless.You just have to know who you can tell or share certain things to and who is going to give positive encouragement. Its all about positive energy..

By Lady Dark w/Dimples

June 25, 2007 11:33 AM | Link to this

Thanks T-Mango for the encouraging words! I agree SJ. My dad is one of the ones who tell me that I shouldn’t leave my job. I know where he’s coming from…he retired from General Motors. He comes from the old skool of work hard at a job and then you retire…he doesn’t know anything else. I know he doesn’t mean any harm and I know that I have to be mentally strong and prepared for the adventure ahead…can’t cry or get on an emotional roller coasters because people think differently.

GA.man were you involved in a serious relationship when you started your thang? If so, did it impact your relationship?

By GA.man AKA "Mr. Entertainment

June 25, 2007 11:39 AM | Link to this

LDD yes i was..she was upset that i was risking soooo much..and that it wouldn’t leave time for her…i told her it would and she hung in there for a bit but she left cause she saw the drive and sometimes when you work for yourself..you cant look for others to do what you need to do…..but you know when she left it all clicked and she saw the success come that i told her about….she even joked maybe i should have hung in there just alittle bit more…..all i could do was laugh at her

By Mo (now known as Moeisha)

June 25, 2007 11:42 AM | Link to this

Lady Dark best of luck to you in your endeavors. You will be fine, just deciding to step out is proof that you are tougher than you give yourself credit for. Dont allow those who dont agree with your decision to deter you. ITS YOUR LIFE and you only get one time to do this, so make the best of it.

SJ & T-Mango some great advice there guys! T-Mango keep us posted on that poetry book..finger snaps in applause for T-Mango

On topic I have put serious dating on hold for two reasons: my child and I am just coming out of a marriage. I need to really take inventory of Mo and decide on what it is I want (and can provide) for my next relationship (also what have a learned from my marriage). But more importantly I have a young child that needs me at my best and if I got into a relationship it would be good for baby or me. I will know when I am ready and I know it will be hard. Right now is just not a good time for another relationship or serious dating for Mo

By Tenacious

June 25, 2007 11:46 AM | Link to this

LDD What’s your current position and what company do you work for if you don’t mind? I might want to apply for your job:)

By Raqi

June 25, 2007 11:48 AM | Link to this

1408?? (shudder)

I totally abhor horror flicks but my company of friends and loved one has deemed it plausible that we will go see 1408 this coming Wednesday evening. First of all I am not a big movie theater go-er. I go from time to time but it has to be something I really want to see. I can count on one hand the number of times my marido and I have sat in a movie theater together. Now if it was Oceans 13 or Fantastic Four then I would be more willing to oblige but watching a horror…ugh. A.GO.NY.

By Blatino aka BMW aka BLT

June 25, 2007 11:50 AM | Link to this

Hi, Laney! We’re gonna miss ya! Please stay in lurkesville and chime in from time to time

On your note, have you READ my posts over the last 6 months??? LOL just kidding.

It’s just that I feel like I’m in a constant state of starting over cuz it seems like anytime real feelings get involved something messes it up.

By Laney

June 25, 2007 12:10 PM | Link to this

If any of y’all are looking for another movie recommendation (not to steal GAman’s thunder!), I saw Once last night, and it was so sweet and romantic…and great music!

By T-Mango

June 25, 2007 12:20 PM | Link to this

@SeanJohnson3000-I agree with you on your point about vision. And you can’t tell everyone about your dreams-sad… yet often too true.

@Mo…Thanks for the support-will do!

By SeanJohnson3000

June 25, 2007 12:40 PM | Link to this

@ Dark Dimples…i remember a while back u saying u and the SO…may be doing the business thing together…is he not your business partner on this venture?

By Ladylike

June 25, 2007 12:40 PM | Link to this

First Congratulations Laney, wishing all the best. Good day Bloggers hope eveyone is having a fantabulous Monday.

Yes I have been in such a situation. I have taken time off from dating to finish school. This seems to be working for me although sometimes I come across that date that I cannot refuse. So there have been instances when dates have found me. One of my latest priorities has been to buy and stop renting. I think I would prefer to start with a clean slate.

By QC

June 25, 2007 12:48 PM | Link to this

Congratulations Laney

trying to catch up on a Monday is totally impossible

I hope you all have a great day!

By Lady J

June 25, 2007 12:52 PM | Link to this

Question good people…While on the quest of finding oneself, being the best parent one can be and soul searching, during the tough and dark days how do you truly get through? What are some positive strategies with not relapsing into old patterns with starting over?

By Lady Dark w/Dimples

June 25, 2007 12:56 PM | Link to this

GA.man That’s what I’m afraid of…I hope we can make it through the tough times…the times when I have to work 80 hours to get it going. But I can’t think of a better time than now to take the risk…single,no kids, and if it doesn’t pan out….back in the workforce before I’m 40!

Thanks Mo for the well wishes..

SJ No, we looked at some opportunities together and individually. I felt compelled to do this one independently….I don’t have a partner.

By IslandGirl

June 25, 2007 1:18 PM | Link to this

Hi Blog Fam. Hope everyone had a great weekend

Laney, good luck with your move and entry into grad school. I can only imagine how excited you are.

Slim, I feel yah on the vacation count down. I don’t go on vacation until the last week of July….I can’t wait.

SJ3000, u know I missed the explanation on your name change. Anway, I agree with you and many others about taking the break from dating. I’ve had to do that especially as a single parent. There are times that I just don’t have the time to date, nor do I really want to make time to date. Now a days, It seems this is my dry season b’cause I’ve not dated anyone (going on 2 years). Not sure what is going on, but I’m not questioning it.

By Sexione

June 25, 2007 1:21 PM | Link to this

LadyJ during the tough and dark days how do you truly get through? Guuurrll, a combo of things……prayer….resting in knowing that His plans are far better than mine, having fun (my daughter and I like to go-cart race, horseback ride, do crazy-active things), take a bubble bath with scented candles and a good drink, read, whatever brings me peace and happiness……..I’ve gotten so good at this that there are very few dark days……lol

Now the next question is How do you get past the extremely horny days as an NBB (non-bullet believer)? lmsao

By T-Mango

June 25, 2007 1:23 PM | Link to this

@Lady J-I think everybody is different. Just my .02 on it.

While on the quest of finding oneself, being the best parent one can be and soul searching, during the tough and dark days how do you truly get through? If you have faith, lean on it. Secondly, discover the things that bring you a sense of fulfillment & joy. Lastly, isolation is not always good during “dark days.” Reach out to others (the ones you know have your back) for support.

What are some positive strategies with not relapsing into old patterns with starting over? Again, I think having a strong support system really helps. However, if you do relapse that will be a reminder (sometimes painful) of why you are making the change in the first place. It doesn’t mean you failed…just means you got off track-

By NCGirlfromATL

June 25, 2007 1:31 PM | Link to this

Congrats Laney!! Welcome to the I-had-a-job-but-went-back-to-school club!

I think I’ve been on dating hiatus for several years. By choice for a while, but now it’s become a hard habit to break! I don’t wanna be on hiatus no more!! LOL!

Blatino I think you and I have similar dating philosphies, based on your posts. You meet someone, vibe with them, get really involved in the chemistry and coolness of the relationship…then they do something unexpected…like saaaaaaay, get back w/ an ex, or forget to tell you they are already in a relationship…and it’s over. You’re crushed, b/c you thought this person was really cool, and someone worth spending your time with. Been there, and have so many of randyt’s t-shirts, I’ve had to give some to Goodwill to make drawer space! LOL! I could be wrong about you, but your stories sound really familiar to me.

By Lady J

June 25, 2007 1:34 PM | Link to this

Thanks Sexione and T-Mango You guys don’t know how much this blog is helping me get through!!!

By SeanJohnson3000

June 25, 2007 1:35 PM | Link to this

@ Irie Girl…i didnt give an explanation….when u say 2 yrs with out dating someing..you do mean dating someone exclusively …not totally dateless right?

@ LadyJ..when u say relasping into old patterns..are you speaking about old flames or types of people u have dated that arent good for you?

By Lady J

June 25, 2007 1:37 PM | Link to this

@T-Mago…I realy need to see and read this not that I have relapse bc I have not and PROUD of myself bc I am truly sticking to my words which is a first for me during starting over bc it is so easy to go tocomfort but this is the TRUTH!!! THANKSWhat are some positive strategies with not relapsing into old patterns with starting over? Again, I think having a strong support system really helps. However, if you do relapse that will be a reminder (sometimes painful) of why you are making the change in the first place. It doesn’t mean you failed…just means you got off track-

By T-Mango

June 25, 2007 1:37 PM | Link to this

@Sexione…

T-Mango looks perplexed by the question…NBB?…Who?? What’s that??…

Can’t off any insight there. Girl, that’s impossible. LMAO

By Lady J

June 25, 2007 1:40 PM | Link to this

And another thing from a guys perspective is that MusingLee stated the other day, I just refuse to allow this person to RESET my buttons to continue BS…Again I am thankful for my stranger older friends in the blog!!! Thanks

By Lady J

June 25, 2007 1:46 PM | Link to this

Both SJ both are the norm so it will be relapsing when those voices start speaking that I need them when I really don’t…Just need to seek new and other people and hobbies…SJ give advice though if you were going to eloborate…

By Raqi

June 25, 2007 1:47 PM | Link to this

Got a somewhat humorous story for you all. (Excuse the typos. Non-proofed)

Saturday we were invited to an event at the residence of business associate that lives in Powder Springs. An area I just so happen to know a little about. Well, my marido was given “directions” by a third party to the location. So we are driving down 285 and get off at South Cobb to get gas. From there all we needed to do was go north on South Cobb and make a left on Cumberland Parkway. It’s actually called something else when turning left but anyway from having gone to the area we were headed more than a few times I knew that’s what we needed to do, so I said so. But utilizing the “directions” that he was given we did not make that turn we kept straight. I informed him that we were going the wrong way. But nooo he had directions and I didn’t know what I was talking about. So here we were riding further in the wrong direction and he starts to get frustrated because we never come to the street that he is looking for. You can’t even get to it from South Cobb. I tell him again we are going the wrong way. By now we are at Austell and I tell him just turn around or get to Atlanta Road and then we can get on Powder Springs. It would be the opposite end of where we are looking to go but at least we will be headed back in the right direction. For that comment I get “You are not even looking at the damn directions. You just want me to turn off on a side street?”

I didn’t need to look at the directions because I knew pretty much where we are trying to go. Duh. We keep right on going wrong until we get to 75. So far away from where we need to be it just ain’t even funny at this point. I open up my phone, call Jimmy and inform that we will not make and to let the host of the event know that. That made him so angry he pulled over and said you drive g—dammit, since you know so much. I politely turned the car around and got us back on track and to where we needed to be. He threw the directions at me and when I saw the name of the exact street that we were looking for I realized that’s the street Whitebread’s brother use to live on. That’s how I knew something about the area.

While we were at the party I told Jimmy that’s how I was able to find it so quick, he found it funny and told my marido and I got to ride home next to a block of ice.

Heck it was his fault. I tried to tell him an hour before he finally let me drive.

By Sexione

June 25, 2007 1:53 PM | Link to this

lmsao @ T-Mango Yes, you read it right! lol No bullet, no mandingo, no serious dating (one or two here and there)……….all this pent-up energy!! The next real man to step to the plate will be in for the game of his life!!!!!! if he makes it that far……lol

By Raqi

June 25, 2007 1:58 PM | Link to this

LadyJ It’s always best to have a support team with will not only hold you up, but that will also push you further when you think you have reached your limit.

By T-Mango

June 25, 2007 2:01 PM | Link to this

@Lady J …*

That’s real cool. Honestly, the discussions have helped me sort things out as well from time to time. Keep your head up. There’s always light at the end of the tunnel. It’s just hard to see sometimes…

By Raqi

June 25, 2007 2:03 PM | Link to this

Sexione Get out of the bullet business and roll your behind over and go to sleep. I found that it was easier to make it as a NBB than it was as the #1 advocate.

By SeanJohnson3000

June 25, 2007 2:05 PM | Link to this

@ LadyJ…first off..how old are u..

By Lady J

June 25, 2007 2:07 PM | Link to this

Thanks Raqi it is that kick I am looking for but you know what Jay * gave me the kick to do something I thought I could not but now that I am it is like I want to continue the pity party but I am truly doing what I thought I could not but it gets tough but T-Mango made a good point about I think can’t be alone all the time while doing it so gots to finds some postive things outside of lil lady and the job…Thanks Raqi* I needed that too!

By Lady J

June 25, 2007 2:12 PM | Link to this

SJ I will be 28 in August and been through too much since 04 to present…

By T-Mango

June 25, 2007 2:13 PM | Link to this

@Sexione…Well girl, I give you props for that. Hold it down:-)

Psssstt…Sounds like you need someone up for a challenge. Hmmmm. Well, when you’re ready to get back out on the plate I think there could be one person that you’d be a match for (based on previous blog comments)…dare I say it…

The Truth. (LOL)

By Mo (now known as Moeisha)

June 25, 2007 2:16 PM | Link to this

Sexione the NBB thing…first off I was LMAO at that one! I am a bullet believer however it doesnt take the place of the real thing, just a temporary release. Sometimes you got to take one for the team and just go to sleep!! LOL The real thing just cannot be replaced.

Lady J I am going through the same thing. For me, I realize that I made it through some pretty rough days already! So I feel like I can handle anything after a divorce. As for persons trying to make me dependent, been there done that and I was more alone than before. To sum it up, I have faith that God has something better for me and I have a child that is dependent on me, period. Life goes on and like I said to Lady Dark, you only get one life and one chance to live it….make the best of it!! Do you!!

By Lady J

June 25, 2007 2:19 PM | Link to this

@T-Mango…Too funny!!!

By Raqi

June 25, 2007 2:22 PM | Link to this

LadyJ I was talking to my parents once about how I wanted a better life for my kids. Better living, better schools and all that good stuff. They asked me, “Do you think you can do?” I said that I felt like in the position that I was in then that I couldn’t. My mother told me “Then you never will.”

Being in the company of positive people just lifts your spirit.

By Lady J

June 25, 2007 2:26 PM | Link to this

Mo I know chile but the light is coming and you are too funny about the bullet but this sis ewill be testing it soon to get through bc I refuse to RESET!!! The BUZZ don’t talk or act so we can get along just fine!!! Mo I feel you sis!

Mo with plenty of time do you plan to re-marry?

By Lady J

June 25, 2007 2:31 PM | Link to this

Raqi8 I am learning that concept as I grow even down to family…I was pondering on why I lost some of the people in my life but it was for the best at the end of the day bc I look back and the ones I though really supported me throught it all did not have my best intrest…Just when I was down and needed them insight but as soon as I started to do things on my won and accomplish things I could not out of fear they were no longer present…I was floored but now I am like it was for the best! *Thanks Raqi

By IslandGirl

June 25, 2007 2:34 PM | Link to this

@SJ3000…no, totally dateless….(not considering my buddy). I have a “mutually agreed upon relationship with benefits” friend. I must tell you I’ve had this friend with benefits since January.

By Mo (now known as Moeisha)

June 25, 2007 2:36 PM | Link to this

Lady J I most definitley want to get married again. I have had plenty of people ask me if I was jaded towards marriage given my situation. Hellz no!! Being married is a great thing if you are with the person you are truly supposed to be with, not the one you chose but the one God chose for you. I know that my husband is out there somewhere…. as cliche as it sounds

On the bullet….it is what it is!! LOL Right now its that and celibacy b/c my ex will NEVER get that close to me again.

By Lady J

June 25, 2007 2:37 PM | Link to this

@IG…How do you do the F?benefits w/out the emotions and wanting more? This concept seems impossible to me…

By Blatino aka BMW aka BLT

June 25, 2007 2:44 PM | Link to this

right on the money, NCGirl. i hate to say it, WLB sistahs, but hit n quit it is just easier right now….

By Lady J

June 25, 2007 2:45 PM | Link to this

I do too Mo…Marriage is a good thing buty with plenty time and self growing I will get there…It is not even in my vocabulary but it is a thought I can’t ignore…lol on the bullet it is what is is and that it will be…lol

By SlimOne

June 25, 2007 2:46 PM | Link to this

Slim is LMAO @ T-Mango trying to recruit Sexione for Drill Sgt Truths Booty Boot Camp LOLOLOL!

T-Mango, Sexione, NC,Lady J I have a confession or a karma cleanser so-to-speak. I took the batteries out of the vcr remote to put in Mr. Bullet. BUT i put them back though. hehehehe

By Sexione

June 25, 2007 2:52 PM | Link to this

Raqi I think you misread me………I’m an NBB (non-bullet believer), so I am far from being an advocate! lol

T-Mango gurl stop that mess!!!! lol You’re right on me requiring a true soldier, however, TheTruth would NOT be the one. I know how he thinks and trust, it wouldn’t go 1 sec with me.Plus, he likes the freaky-do-each-other kinda chicks, and that dayum sho ain’t me!! And finally, he sounds too young (minded)……..I need a more mature man. But that was funny as hayo!!!

lol @ Mo

IG I used to have one of those for several yrs……then it got old so I stepped off……not because I wanted more with him, I just knew I could do better…..

By Lady J

June 25, 2007 2:55 PM | Link to this

Okay good people as always thanks for the wisdom…Great blog day!!! Laney again nothing but the best to you sis! Peace

@SeanJohnson3000…If you want to elaborate more hit me at missj8@gmail.com…Peace

By Lady J

June 25, 2007 2:58 PM | Link to this

lol Slim…Oh I will be testing and doing post planning so today is my last full day of blogging…Friday gots things to do…Be back in full swng thought @ home next week!! I willbe lurking but have to be on good behavior this week!! lol

Yall take care! SLimm Enjoy your vaction! I can’t wait til Thursday!!

-Bye

By Sexione

June 25, 2007 2:58 PM | Link to this

I’m out……til tomorrow!!

By Raqi

June 25, 2007 2:58 PM | Link to this

Back on Topic:

I realize that I only started over once and that is why I ended up in some less than good ideal.

When my first husband was killed, I didn’t started over I just got caught up with the next guy that seemed to be what I wanted. After that went awry, I didn’t started over but got with a guy that seemed to be fun and could show me a good time. It was only after him that I realized I needed to step off for a while and start over. I needed to put my priorities in their right place. I needed to listen to logic and not emotions. That’s when everything began to fall in place and good things began to happen. So what I was sleeping alone. When I got busy taking care of my obligations it didn’t even matter that much. Yeah I am human and some days (read nights) were harder than others, but I could not compromise. I would read or something until I fell asleep and the next morning the thought would be long gone. I do feel like I had a new beginning 9 years ago. Everything got better 10 times over. I got a better work position, a better house, better schooling for my kids, a better grasp on reality and last but definitely not least a better partner to make the better that much better.

By IslandGirl

June 25, 2007 3:02 PM | Link to this

Lady J….I care for him….it would be foolish to deny I have feelings for him. I just don’t expect anything from our relationship and never have. I told him from the begining that I was not ready for a serious relationship. It really isn’t complicated because love to me is much more than having sex. If I allow myself to become more involved in his life….then things would become complicated.

By SeanJohnson3000

June 25, 2007 3:03 PM | Link to this

@ LadyJ…you are still young..and for a female 27-32 is like a transition age…from “i am grown” to really getting your grown woman on…and when u get your grown woman on u will be able to distinquish from what looks and or feels good…to whats actually good for you when it comes to the opposite sx..u shouldnt be hard on yourself because it sounds like u ahve been through a lot early in life..from your ex… to what u had to go through with his family and the baby..date lite..dont get to serious…and think, do and date out of the box from what u normally date…u may be limiting yourself and your options…above all take care of your daughter and have fun…life to too short not to enjoy….get you a bullet too…because it sounds like its hard for you to seperate sxual pleasure from feelings…and its no need to keep going down a path being hurt by familiar situations

By SlimOne

June 25, 2007 3:05 PM | Link to this

Lady J Thanks! I’ll be sure to take a few shots in the whole of blogsvilled memory all next week.

By IslandGirl

June 25, 2007 3:09 PM | Link to this

Raqi….you inspire us.

By T-Mango

June 25, 2007 3:13 PM | Link to this

I took the batteries out of the vcr remote

Slim-This is perfectly acceptable under code 11.25 of the WLB Manual. It was a crisis situation and you had to do what was necessary to resolve the issue and save yourself.

By Mo (now known as Moeisha)

June 25, 2007 3:14 PM | Link to this

SJ you gave some great advice in that last post! ^5 I am in that age range you spoke of but I learned to separate feelings from what feels good in college. Its not hard as long as you play by the rules and understand each other from the get-go. You already know that if feelings come into play that its a done deal. I think that will be my next adventure b/c I cant foresee going into a serious relationship anytime soon. I have a few emotional scars I need to tend to first

By NCGirlfromATL

June 25, 2007 3:20 PM | Link to this

Blatino I feel you. It’s hard to be a person who feels deeply sometimes.

Slim I took the batteries out of the vcr remote to put in Mr. Bullet. BUT i put them back though. LMAO!!!!

Slim’s remote sitting on the table looking dejected b/c Mr. Bullet got all of the love this weekend!

By SlimOne

June 25, 2007 3:23 PM | Link to this

T-Mango I accept your pardon under the protection of code 11.25 of the WLB. I’m forever gracious. LOL

Sean 3000 keep on giving out great advice and I’ll have to change your name to SeanYoda3000 or Seanstrodamus. lol

By Deeva4Life

June 25, 2007 3:28 PM | Link to this

^5 SJ great post. Those words were true nuggets of wisdom and very positive. Impressive.

By Mo (now known as Moeisha)

June 25, 2007 3:33 PM | Link to this

SlimOne I agree with you on either one of SJ’s new names!! LOL He is puttin it down on the advice! :0)

By SeanJohnson3000

June 25, 2007 3:42 PM | Link to this

@ Slim…u got jokes? i wish i coulda been a fly on the wall when u was naked ..legs spead and realized the bullet died…lol.

By SlimOne

June 25, 2007 3:51 PM | Link to this

SJ I was actually giving you a compliment….hidden inside of a joke (sort of like a crackerjack prize) lol Actually, me and Mr Bullet know each other well so I knew beforehand that he was a little weak. So i was pretty prepared when i used the other remotes batteries. No surprises here.

By GA.man AKA "Mr. Entertainment

June 25, 2007 3:53 PM | Link to this

lololol @SJ…laughing at*Slim when her battiers went dead……bot ohhhh boy

Well as always *It’s time to go…but ya’ll know what i am gonna say…..

If you got problems…put God in it..he can fix anything..and you can take that to the Bank….

One love for each and every one of you

Laney girl i will miss you..but do yo thang…keep the email addy and stay in touch ok….

MLB for 4 Life

oooh yeah great advice today SJ….

By Raqi

June 25, 2007 3:54 PM | Link to this

Thank you Island Girl. I’m just glad that I have something to offer.

By For Real

June 25, 2007 4:05 PM | Link to this

Slim: Man I can’t take this no dayumm mo. Where Mr. Bullet. Awww yes hey baby mamma is ready for you. click, click.. Awwwww Dayumm the batteries are dead. What am I going to do?

Mr. Bullet: You could take the batteries out the clock radio.

Clock Radio: Hey, hey, I got a 9 volt I can’t do you no good potnah.

Slim: He right baby…

Mr. Bullet: What about a battery in the Easy Bake Oven.

Easy Bake Oven: Hold on playa in A/C

By DuShawn

June 25, 2007 4:07 PM | Link to this

Slims date: wuzzup baby, you ready. Slim: have a seat I’ll be down in a minute. You can watch some TV if you want. (Dude grabs remote) Uuugh…Dayum whats all this sticky shyt on the remote? It smells like fish grease.

By SmileyC

June 25, 2007 4:10 PM | Link to this

Laney Congrats on the scholorship and good luck with Grad school!!!

I myself decided to take a break from the dating scene after I broke up with my last SO a couple of months ago. I’m in school working on my BS degree (I have another year left), decided I would go get my Masters as well…I would like to finish, before lil man gets into school (so I have 4yrs before that happens). So, that way I can concentrate on him and his school activities and not my hw, etc.

Slimone - when your not looking that’s when you get the most attention!! That’s the truth!!

By SeanJohnson3000

June 25, 2007 4:11 PM | Link to this

@ Slim…thanks for the compliment..i hope yall help me when i need some female advise….i got a way yall get rid yourself of the bullet….

By Red Khezu

June 25, 2007 4:13 PM | Link to this

Can you choose to avoid dating, or will it come and find you anyway? Some people choose to never Date. I think if you are really trying to find someone, one way or another you will be found or find that someone. Me personally, as a single man, a relationship is the least of my concern. After spending considerate amount of time with someone who you cant trust and was a waste of a decade, I think I’ll be just fine having things my way for awhile. But I do believe if a person wants to stay single, it should be respected, and not something people should force upon those who wish to be single for any reason.

By SlimOne

June 25, 2007 4:21 PM | Link to this

For Real If i still have an Easy Bake Oven, then I have bigger problems that a low battery bullet. lol

Du Awww man! Why it gotta smell like fish grease? Uggghhh!

SeanJ now you know I’m on the edge of my seat waiting for this big solution….

By SeanJohnson3000

June 25, 2007 4:38 PM | Link to this

@ Slim…i was bullshytn..the bullet has spoiled yall though….to the point that its keeping yall from getting out there dating…or shall i say having sx when u date…too easy for females to rely on the bullet for a nutt these days..it has side affects too…female buddy of mine told me ..how it has messed her up for catching one with the real thing..she was celibate for over a year with only bullet play…when she got the real..she admitted how it desensitized her from it…so now its either oral or the bullet that she said gets her off.

By SlimOne

June 25, 2007 4:51 PM | Link to this

Sean J Mr. Bullet is a once-in-a-while deal….I don’t think I ever mentioned not getting my rocks off while dating. There’s a certain term for that kind of thing and it’s called a ‘special friend’. So believe me, I’m not hurting for an ‘O’. I thought you knew me better than that The Enlightened One. Don’t tell me your skillz are dwindling. lol