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AJC.com > Living > Blog > Archives > 2007 > April > 20 > Entry
DEL.ICIO.USYour brain is beautiful
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
The Washington Post recently ran this article about “intellidating” — in short, going on dates that rely on a lot more brainpower than the average outing for dinner and a movie. Think political discussions. Spelling competitions. Book readings. Lectures on history, philosophy or art.
On face, it sounds sort of hopelessly nerdy. Whose idea of a romantic night out is a spelling bee?? (Certainly not mine — I have childhood flashbacks to my inability to correctly spell “balloon” in competition.) But given how important finding a smart, thoughtful partner is to many people, myself definitely included, maybe it’s a great idea to test the waters early.
In the article, a 28-year-old man who has just returned from a date to a lecture about religion in America reflects: Criss said they argued during the 40-minute subway ride back to Lauber’s apartment in Upper Manhattan. “It’s not like we were just fighting. We were interacting, sharing thoughts, and that was far more satisfying than if we’d gone out to see the movie of the week.”
Sounds like a pretty good date to me.
What do you think of this type of date? Have you ever gone on dates (preferably in Atlanta) that would qualify as “intellidating”? Where did you go? What did you do? How did it go?
How important is intelligence as a factor for you in a partner? How do you determine how smart someone is?
What kind of dates best challenge your intelligence?
Permalink | Comments (180) | Post your comment | Categories: Dating
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Comments
By SlimOne
April 20, 2007 8:26 AM | Link to this
TGIF!
By Sexione
April 20, 2007 8:43 AM | Link to this
Amen!!! TGIF!!!!!!!!!!!!!
By Lady J
April 20, 2007 8:44 AM | Link to this
I live for Friday!!! What a great weekend ahead!!! Everyone have a great day and weekend!!!:)
By QC
April 20, 2007 8:51 AM | Link to this
Happy Friday Bloggers
I’ll be at the Lurkesville Blog Cafe serving donuts, latte & Dasani Water
Have a great day bloggers!!!!!
By Chullato
April 20, 2007 9:00 AM | Link to this
Good Morning All,
Intellidating wasn’t happening when I was dating, but the description of it reminds of a Mensa chapter meeting.
Intelligence is a huge aphrodisiac for me, though. I remember begin attracted to a, in my opinion, average looking biochemist, because she explained to me how the Atkins diet worked on a chemical level.
I am an information junkie, so learning new things from a SO adds to the attraction.
I also enjoy a spirited debate. Therefore, my SO has to be able to convey thoughts and ideas clearly enough to be persuasive.
By kinderbabe
April 20, 2007 9:01 AM | Link to this
good morning all.:) i think intellidating is a great idea. it’s nothing like intellectual stimulation. i love to see how the mind of a potential love interest works. i think being smart is sexy.:) besides, anyone who knows me knows that i bore easily…lol. physical attraction comes and goes, but intellectual connection is the gift that keeps giving.:)
last year, i attended a sketching class at the high museum w/a date. this could be considered more of an “artsy” date, however it did give me great insight to how broad his interests are. i also have gone to community sponsored events and found it to be a good experience w/a date. it’s a great experience to date outside the box. it allows you to see how free a person really is.
By Cinderella
April 20, 2007 9:05 AM | Link to this
Morning Peeps!
Eyecandy and I often go to Barnes & Nobles for an evening to hangout, do some reading, and discuss what we’ve learned. Does that qualify as intellidating?? But that’s prolly the most serious thing we do. We usually like to veg out and watch hours of mindless TV and order chinese. Our work is so serious during the week we try to save our brainpower on the weekend :)
By Icecold
April 20, 2007 9:06 AM | Link to this
Good Morning all…..sorry this is off topic & I know its been discuss numerous times already but I really didn’t pay much attention since it didn’t pertain to me at the time….here goes..I met this guy a few weeks ago/we went out a couple of weeks ago/had a good time….he seems nice thus far/really funny which is the main reasons i even went out with him…the only thing is he’s only 5’7..Im 5’3 but I wear alot of platform shoes so that will put us at/about the same height & I refuse to wear flats all the time when going out…I have never been in this situation….I see how JAnet claims that JD is the love of her life & he’s only like what 5 feet…he’s shorter than Janet with flats on from what I can tell anyway….so I guess I need to read/hear how petty I am being…BTW I do have a second date with him this weekend…so let me have it..I will have to check back a little later…
By Biff
April 20, 2007 9:07 AM | Link to this
This is what happens when all the chicks get fat. They want to have some kind of discussion and the type of guy for them is a metrosexual, desexed P.C. green stater.
Listen, its fine if a chick wants to read and stuff, but what real men are looking for is HOTS.
By G
April 20, 2007 9:18 AM | Link to this
Wow! There’s nothing I like better than having a healthy discussion of politics leading to a night-cap. Just my experience…..if there is a difference of opinion things usually end up bad. Everyone is not open to agree to disagree.
By Lady Dark w/Dimples
April 20, 2007 9:18 AM | Link to this
Good Friday Everyone
It’s very interesting that you would write about this topic today. A girlfriend and I had this very same discussion yesterday. Right before I met my current SO I met this guy at church. We had a few conversations and went out on a date once. I told my girlfriend that the main problem with this dude is that I don’t think I can hold a conversation that has any substance with this dude. If I brought up current events he would listen (or atleast I thought he would) and at the end he would say….hmmm interesting. So, I thought maybe it was just the topics that I brought. I asked him if he follows current events and he was like nope! I even remember him telling me that if I wanted to have a man that I need to give up some of my extra-curricular activities. I don’t know…I just felt like there wasn’t much to dude besides sports and hanging out with his friends. And that’s a BIG thing for me to say considering I’m a huge sports fan!
Oh yeah, another comment he made one time, is that…I don’t like to speak in meetings. Well, everyone knows that you can’t move up in corporate america with your mouth glued shut. That comment made me think he didn’t have any drive….he wanted to leave work everyday at 4.30pm to go play ball with his friends.
By Sexione
April 20, 2007 9:20 AM | Link to this
i think being smart is sexy.:) I agree 100%!!!!! And don’t let him be a “hottie” on top of that too…..extremely sexi!!!!
By JustMe
April 20, 2007 9:26 AM | Link to this
Good Friday Morning All
I’ve never tried intellidating per se, however the ability to have stimulating intellectual conversation is a must. I find myself wildly attracted to men with whom I can discuss a variety of topics with.
I think it would be a great date to go to the High Museum or Planetarium, or to an art class or cooking class or any event that requires the attendees to think outside of the box.
By Linguist
April 20, 2007 9:32 AM | Link to this
Morning Blog Fam I’ll have to lurk on this one for now need coffee… badly..
Ling off to get coffee/cream/equal with a side of Dasani water at the blog cafe with QC
By ImAPeach404
April 20, 2007 9:35 AM | Link to this
Hey… mornin’
I haven’t read the article yet, but I would love this type of date! There is nothing more attractive to me than a man who can tell me things I don’t already know.
I love really smart people in general, but a smart man - especially if he wears glasses!!! - is such a turn on. I enjoy ideas, differences of opinion, and to discuss different topics. This is why as a single gal… I try to meet guys in spots I enjoy because it’s more probable that we will have the same interest, i.e. the museum, the bookstore, caribou coffee, the grocery store, a community group, or doing volunteer work. If on some super rare occasion my girlfriends drag me to the club, and I meet a guy, I really don’t even care if he calls b/c I would assume that he likes to club.
I believe it was Laney who mentioned the guy in the airport who had completly different views and she blew him off b/c she didn’t think they had much in common - I said that day he would make for an interesting debating partner if nothing else. See, I bet he would have been good for an intellidate!
By abc
April 20, 2007 9:37 AM | Link to this
Typical dates for me are museums, plays, lectures, symposiums. Minor league ballgames are another favorite. While American IQs average between 90-109, mine is 160, and I require a more intelligent romantic interest. Not that I discriminate based on things like IQ; I volunteer with organizations that support mentally and physically challenged adults with IQs under 50, and they’re my friends. But, I recognize that by and large, and on average, people just simply aren’ that bright.
By Mo (now known as Moeisha)
April 20, 2007 9:39 AM | Link to this
Morning ALL!! TGIF!! I will have to lurk on this til my allergy meds kick in, my head feels like I am riding in an ever-ascending airplane!
Can whomever is running the blog cafe whip me up a fruit smoothie please?!?!
By Sexione
April 20, 2007 9:40 AM | Link to this
DICTIONARY OF DATING
DATING: The process of spending enormous amounts of money, time, and energy to get better acquainted with a person whom you don’t especially like in the present and will learn to like a lot less in the future.
EASY: A term used to describe a woman who has the morals of a man.
EYE CONTACT: A method utilized by a single woman to communicate to a man that she is interested in him. Despite being advised to do so, many women have difficulty looking a man directly in the eyes, not necessarily due to the shyness, but usually due to the fact that a woman’s eyes are not located in her chest.
FRIEND: A member of the opposite sex in your acquaintance who has some flaw which makes sleeping with him/her totally unappealing.
INDIFFERENCE: A woman’s feeling towards a man, which is interpreted by the man as “playing hard to get.”
IRRITATING HABIT: What the endearing little qualities that initially attract two people to each other turn into after a few months together.
NYMPHOMANIAC: A man’s term for a woman who wants to do it more often than he does.
SOBER: A condition in which it is almost impossible to fall in love.
ATTRACTION: The act of associating horniness with a particular person.
LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT: What occurs when two extremely horny, but not entirely choosy people meet.
LAW OF RELATIVITY: How attractive a given person appears to be is directly proportionate to how unattractive your date is.
By Lady Dark w/Dimples
April 20, 2007 9:54 AM | Link to this
sexi LMAO
ice,ice baby I don’t know if you’re petty just yet….you are still going out with him so you’re trying to overcome your hesistation. But I think people are entitled to their preferences…you just have to be able to live with the consequences of passing up a wonderful man (if that’s the case). No one says you have to abandon your preferences…usually life experiences teaches us to re-evaluate them. After enough losers, you may reconsider the height thing….maybe not. But it’s your choice.
Own your choices, live with the consequences
By SeanJohnson
April 20, 2007 9:56 AM | Link to this
Sup Blog…TGIF
I can honestly say i havent had an “intellidate” in a minute…i think it would be a refreshing change..smart women are a turn on….and brings that mental attraction into the equation…I know a lot of females are college educated but a lot of the ones i dealt with..were not into current events or politicals..and only read romance novels…I asked one what was up with that…and her response was..she “didnt like to hear about all the negative stuff that goes on”.
Do you ladies prefer book smart or common sense smart dudes?
By T-Mango
April 20, 2007 9:57 AM | Link to this
Good morning.
I was typing my comment and then I lost it. So, I’ll try again. Hope it doesn’t post 2x
Intelligence in a man is important to me. Conversations about the world, current events, people & their choices provides insight into the content of an individual. A man that can discuss and respectfully debate issues with me has a way of pulling me in. It intrigues me. It allows me to see if the person holds a myopic view of the world, has no view at all, or if he has reached an understanding with regard to himself and his role in the world-the content of a man.
I’ve never consciously been out on an intellidate. We tend to just talk about things that are on our minds or bring things up based on observation. Moreover, I don’t think it’s my place to judge how intelligent a person is. Their intellectual gift is their intellectual gift and I can’t do anything about that.
Intelligence to me is beyond just knowing facts. It is about learning and experience.
Have a great day & weekend-
By T-Mango
April 20, 2007 10:05 AM | Link to this
@SeanJohnson
Do you ladies prefer book smart or common sense smart dudes? A man that has both is what I prefer. I like a little “street smarts” too-
By SlimOne
April 20, 2007 10:05 AM | Link to this
SeanJ Do you ladies prefer book smart or common sense smart dudes?
I would prefer both. Book sense will only take you so far without also having common sense. You’ll be surprised how far you can get using your common sense. I’ve been around someone that didn’t have common sense and it was so frustrating. I guess common sense it’s really that common.
By Lady J
April 20, 2007 10:05 AM | Link to this
Common sense for me! Not that I want a dummy but I don’t want intellect to overide common sense! It does happen in our society…Just my thought!
By Mochatreat07
April 20, 2007 10:08 AM | Link to this
Good morning Slim, Justme, Sexione, Foots, Kinder, GAman, abc, Raqi, MO, QC, NC, Musing, Alvin, Jake, Demi, Randy and crew
It’s Friday, It’s Friday the end of the week and the last day….I going to get my Prom on (my daughter is going to the prom this weekend)….I am going to get my read on and I am going to get my church on all weekend long!!
I believe intelligence is important…it is up there with honesty, loyality, communication. I have to be able to communicate with a person on many different levels….I look for someone who will compliment me and I should compliment him as well.
By Sexione
April 20, 2007 10:11 AM | Link to this
Do you ladies prefer book smart or common sense smart dudes?
My ideal would be a combo of the two!!
I don’t think it’s my place to judge how intelligent a person is. Their intellectual gift is their intellectual gift and I can’t do anything about that. So true, so true!!!
By SlimOne
April 20, 2007 10:12 AM | Link to this
oops…I guess common sense isn’t really that common.
By abc
April 20, 2007 10:15 AM | Link to this
Would someone please elucidate upon the difference between so-called ‘common sense’ and measureable intelligence in terms of how the presence of one has any possible detrimental effect on the other? That just plain doesn’t make any sense.
“I don’t know anything about [art/music/fill in the blank] but I know what I like.” “I don’t take tests well.” “He has book smarts but no common sense.” To me, these are attempts to rationalize one’s excuses for not applying their own intelligence, such as it may be, to any given situation or subject of interest/disinterest.
By Sexione
April 20, 2007 10:19 AM | Link to this
Oh, and throw in some “street smarts” and it’s a done deal!!!
By kinderbabe
April 20, 2007 10:21 AM | Link to this
hey mo, sexione, ladyj, peach, ladyd, justme, ling, slimone, qc. how are you ladies this morning?:)
By Museq
April 20, 2007 10:21 AM | Link to this
Good morning, Ms. Sexione! IF guilty, I MIGHT have taken offense at the EASY definition; “morals of a man”? That was NOT necessary now, was it? Are you implying that all men are easy?
My pics, details and e-mail address are available BUT, I’m NOT easy and you’ll have to WORK for it…LOL!
By Lady J
April 20, 2007 10:23 AM | Link to this
Sexi1 I was thinking that but I do want that also…My co-worker told me the other day she has a date with a Thug in a Suit…I told her you know what I have that too…Has a great position at the job and seperate the two after hours…lol
By Chullato
April 20, 2007 10:24 AM | Link to this
I second abc’s 10:15
By kinderbabe
April 20, 2007 10:25 AM | Link to this
abc what you said makes sense. knowledge is only as good as its application…and the various ways of application.
By Museq
April 20, 2007 10:25 AM | Link to this
Slim - No, common sense is NOT common at all. The continued popularity of ‘reality Tv’ & ‘Idle’ is just an example…LOL! You don’t watch these do ya? :-o
By The Truth
April 20, 2007 10:25 AM | Link to this
Intelligence in a woman is very important. Physical beauty without a great brain is worthless. Plus a smart woman is sexy as hell. Like sexione said, a combo of street and book smarts is the key. I wouldn’t want a brainiac or a 10 but I like 8’s across the board. Smart, funny (Sexi1), able to adapt to different enviroments, adaptable. Life changes and you need a partner that can change with it.
By Lady J
April 20, 2007 10:29 AM | Link to this
Hey Kinderbabe and crew!!!! I am doing well thanks…How are you?
By Lady Dark w/Dimples
April 20, 2007 10:30 AM | Link to this
Hey kinderbabe! I’m fine this morning….whassup with you?
By Sexione
April 20, 2007 10:31 AM | Link to this
kinder hey lady!! I’m cool….ready to call it a day, though!! How r u today?
Museq It was a joke sweetie!! The regulars know I have a great sense of humor…..and I like to share!!
LadyJ Sounds like you’ve got a well-rounded man!! You go gurl!!!
By kinderbabe
April 20, 2007 10:39 AM | Link to this
ladyj, ladyd, sexione i’m doing great, thanks.:) ready for the weekend to start just like everyone else…lol. i’m hoping that the weather stays warm and pretty so that i can enjoy the park this weekend. i may even try to rollerblade. now that should be somethin…lol.
By SeanJohnson
April 20, 2007 10:41 AM | Link to this
@LadyJ & Sexione…i dont think those guys are thugs…not real thugs…just dudes from the street are able to seperate business from personal lives
By Lady J
April 20, 2007 10:41 AM | Link to this
Sexione it is what it is through and through!!! lol
By SlimOne
April 20, 2007 10:43 AM | Link to this
What’s up kinder and Mocha….Is it 5:00 yet? :-(
By Wise Diva
April 20, 2007 10:43 AM | Link to this
oh I score big on intellidates, a lot of guys really get a kick out of my love for science, but I do agree that being well rounded goes really far in the dating world. Please have insight about many different things, enough to at least have an intelligent conversation about it.
I think having dates with a focus on art, culture, community work are by far the BEST. You get to see a lot more “character and personality” stuff. People get out of those movie theaters! LOL
Have a wonderful weekend!!
By Mo (now known as Moeisha)
April 20, 2007 10:43 AM | Link to this
Hey Kinderbabe, MochaTreat, Lady J, Lady D, SlimOne, Sexione and the rest of the crew!!!
SJ I prefer a good combination of both common and book sense. I also appreciate life experiences. What I mean by that is a lot of times life experiences is what contributes to common sense, maturity , etc. Does that make sense?
By Lady J
April 20, 2007 10:44 AM | Link to this
Not being to picky but I need a person to process conflict and most times that is incoperating common sense vs the books…The books help but daily living and so hands on and technical…sometimes the basic…I have seen over the top academic men just lose it sometimes with the basics…I am going to be honest most don’t hold my attention…I admire that that they are gifted but no attraction from me…
By Lady Dark w/Dimples
April 20, 2007 10:45 AM | Link to this
kinderbabe I have a pair of brand new rollerblades, knee pads,elbow pads, etc….that I’ve never used….every year I keep telling myself that you won’t bust your azz and to get our there….but something about not being able to really stop on rollerblades is scary…not to mention staying vertical!
By Lady J
April 20, 2007 10:48 AM | Link to this
Hey Mo!
By abc
April 20, 2007 10:50 AM | Link to this
No examples offered yet; ‘well rounded’, ‘insight about many different things’? “Common sense vs. the books’? What, smart guys don’t want to talk about sports enough, or what?
By kinderbabe
April 20, 2007 10:53 AM | Link to this
slim i’m just trying to make it til 3 lol.
sj you’re right…that’s not a real thug. as i’ve gotten older, i prefer little to no street ways as possible…lol. it has way more cons than pros (no pun intended) lol. that might have been cute in my twenties but i’m all the way over it now. i’ll stick to a sensible, intelligent, legal-money making brotha.:)
By Dr. Kym Relationship Expert
April 20, 2007 10:53 AM | Link to this
Good Morning All,
I haven’t went out with someone for the purpose of intellidating, however I do welcome stimulating debates and a well-read person. Well-read means have an interest in something other than sports or video games. Politics, social issues..etc.
Now to balance that I dont enjoy the company of a know it all. Yes you can have knowledge of many things(that is through research, education and life experiences) but if you don’t know anything about the subject…just say I dont know but that is interesting I will look it up.
By SlimOne
April 20, 2007 10:53 AM | Link to this
Lady D I haven’t been on a pair of rollerblades ever since I had to use a bush to stop my fall which then projected me into a ditch. OUCH!
By kinderbabe
April 20, 2007 10:55 AM | Link to this
ladyd really?? you and your s.o. should go out there and try it. you already have all of the equipment. how does he feel about rollerblades? that could be a cute experience:) i’ll talk one of my friends into trying it, maybe on saturday or sunday afternoon.
By binford
April 20, 2007 10:58 AM | Link to this
abc
In my observation I have noticed that extremely intelligent people who spent a lot of time reading/studying spent less time learning how to interact with the outside world. So “common sense” implies the sense is common to a group of people; if a person submerses themselves in something (books/music/sports/some sort of skill) and doesn’t interact with people - that’s where the disconnect comes in.
By Lady J
April 20, 2007 11:00 AM | Link to this
You are right SJ he is not a thug but have streets smarts and I like it no thug at all!!! Trust don’t do thugs but like the .05% concept!!!lolol
By Mo (now known as Moeisha)
April 20, 2007 11:01 AM | Link to this
abc for me, I like guys that like athletics (to play or watch) but also can talk about books, religion, current affairs, latest music, what may be wrong with my car, etc. That is what I mean when I say “well-rounded”. Someone that possesses both common and book sense..
By abc
April 20, 2007 11:04 AM | Link to this
binford, I can relate to that somewhat, although it seems like a generalization gleaned from movies and T.V. On the other hand, highly intelligent people can often get bored with typical banter in a light social scene, seem aloof, and gain labels such as ‘snob’. It’s a deserved label, perhaps, but better than boredom.
By kinderbabe
April 20, 2007 11:06 AM | Link to this
o.k. abc my perception of a well-rounded person is one that can participate and enjoy a variety of activities and situations. for instance, the person can enjoy skating, attending lectures, dining, board games and salsa dancing. well-rounded means having varied interests, whatever those interests are. a well-rounded person is is multi-dimensional.
common sense is in alignment w/functioning well in the world. for instance, not walking into moving traffic, seeing a coatrack and hanging up your coat, grabbing the door knob to open a door, having enough money to pay for your purchase at the counter, etc. these are ways to meet basic needs, basic common needs. now, book sense is altogether different. it requires studying and the retention of facts/information. ideally, one would have a combo of both to optimally function in the world.
intelligent people can apply their intelligence in a plethora of ways. that’s where being well-rounded comes in.
By Chullato
April 20, 2007 11:09 AM | Link to this
Binford I think that is a broad generalization. From my experience, highly intelligent people have common sense, it’s just that their sense is higher than that of the common.
By Atl Lady
April 20, 2007 11:10 AM | Link to this
Good Morning All TGIF I like the concept of intellidating, but I have been in a situation where I dated a guy that I originally flipped for because he was so smart. After awhile, I got tired of him ‘testing’ my intelligence level at every turn. I wanted some quiet evenings of nothingness sometimes. I also drew more than one boyfriend to me because I could talk on their level. It just depends on the two people involved.
Now Ice Cold, you’re taking the napolean complex thing to a new level. A short person who’s insecure in dating another short person who is actually taller. If you can wear heels and not be taller than your beau, that is a good thing and roll with it until further notice.
By Island Girl
April 20, 2007 11:12 AM | Link to this
Good morning everyone.. I’ve been lurking for a while and doing work at the desk. I personally enjoy the company of someone that is smart. When I moved to ATL, my first date took me to the MLK center and various sites around Atlanta. I considered that to have been one of my best dates (out of the norm…dinner, movie, play, etc).
ABC, I believe the founder of Wendy’s never attended college and didn’t have much of a formal education, but he has one of the most successful businesses today. We can argue that he is naturally gift and intelligent or he relied on his “know how” based on what he has seen, heard and possibly picked up along the way “aka common sense”.
By Sexione
April 20, 2007 11:12 AM | Link to this
I thought that “well-rounded” was pretty self explanatory…being that we were speaking of book smarts vs. common sense smarts vs. street smarts….
LadyJ Ok, maybe thug was too strong……like I said before, street smarts!
By SeanJohnson
April 20, 2007 11:14 AM | Link to this
@ KB & LadyJ…just making sure yall know the difference between someone with street smarts and a thug…its a BIG difference..
@ KB * i’m all the way over it now. i’ll stick to a sensible, intelligent, legal-money making brotha.:)*…are you sure about this??? i read earlier you get bored quick..i have that same problem..
By Lady Dark w/Dimples
April 20, 2007 11:15 AM | Link to this
slim…that’s what i picture when I see me out there on rollerblades…I actually went to sports authority to purchase some skates and to my surprise all they sold were rollerblades for adults…
kinder…..hmmmm, for some reason I never got the vibe that he would go for rollerblading….that would be hilarious!! I might have to ask him, we usually ride our bikes on Sat mornings…but I’ll see what he may be down for….I’m laughing at the thought of him on blades
By Dr. Kym Relationship Expert
April 20, 2007 11:15 AM | Link to this
binford I agree with your 10:58 statements.
abc I don’t think it is a gneralization from movies or T.V. yes some highly intelligent people can get bored with the social scene but I have met quite a few who are so introverted that they can’t adapt to any social setting.
By Lady J
April 20, 2007 11:16 AM | Link to this
@Chullato…great point…Maybe that is why my attention span is short with them I was an a,b, and some c student not highly or gifted…and mix with averae students so hey maybe I need to expand…Wow enlightening..lolol
By Demi
April 20, 2007 11:17 AM | Link to this
Funny this topic comes up today. Last night I had two choices of women to choose from:
Jezebel: Is a top of the line dime piece, no brain, but comes with a guaranteed “happy ending”.
Wisdom: Is a highly intelligent sexy mature sister, with no “happy ending” in sight between now and never.
I simply deleted Jezebel’s number and headed over Wisdom’s house, for some brain and soul food.
Man shall not live and be upheld and sustained by bread alone, but by every word that comes forth from the mouth of God.
I left wisdom’s house with a full tummy and an over stuff head….And a full sac, LOL.
Becareful for what you pray for.
By Lady J
April 20, 2007 11:19 AM | Link to this
Thanks for the clarification…It is a big difference indeed SJ and Sexione!
By Lady Dark w/Dimples
April 20, 2007 11:20 AM | Link to this
Me and my most recent EX used to love hanging out at Borders. We would go there and get a stack of books/magazines and sit quietly and read our books independently. Every so often we would share something interesting with each other. That actually was a really to me.
Does that make me a nerd? LOL
By abc
April 20, 2007 11:21 AM | Link to this
So far, it seems that the highly intelligent are stereotyped as total nerds that aren’t athletic, don’t play sports, have little social grace, don’t enjoy pleasures of simple games, etc. Frankly, I just haven’t found that to be very true; in my experience, the more intelligence, the more diversity.
By abc
April 20, 2007 11:25 AM | Link to this
…and as far as vast business success and incredible wealth goes, it’s been demonstrated to me time and again that it takes not great intelligence to achieve that, but rather relentless drive and a killer instinct. People like that are rarely a pleasure to be around either, IMHO!
By Sexione
April 20, 2007 11:25 AM | Link to this
Off topic….
Georgia Right to Life says it will pursue “no abortions, no exceptions” next year
This week’s decision by the U.S. Supreme Court against partial-birth abortion has fired up those who would like to do away with abortion entirely — even in cases of rape and incest.
Dan Becker of Georgia Right to Life says his group next year will push a state constitutional amendment to declare the unborn as legal “persons” worthy of protection.
By SlimOne
April 20, 2007 11:26 AM | Link to this
Demi You never cease to amaze me and send a good laugh my way.
I left wisdom’s house with a full tummy and an over stuff head….And a full sac, LOL.
By kinderbabe
April 20, 2007 11:28 AM | Link to this
ladyd try it! you have to let me know how it turns out if you two go.
sj me getting bored quick has nothing to do w/”lack of thug appeal” lol. it usually has to do w/the inablility to hold a decent intelligent conversation…more than “watchudoing and howyoudoing”lol. a combination of that and thinking sex is the “end all, be all” will make me check out quick. i need more…
By Mo (now known as Moeisha)
April 20, 2007 11:32 AM | Link to this
Lady D no that doesnt make you a nerd!!! I wish I could find a man that would do that with me from time to time….sigh
By Lady J
April 20, 2007 11:33 AM | Link to this
Wow Demi great post and POD to you!!! How are you…That was a good post!
By Dr. Kym Relationship Expert
April 20, 2007 11:38 AM | Link to this
abc What makes someone highly intelligent?
I understand there is IQ testing but I like to believe there are levels of intelligence..for example some people are great in math and science but average in english and social sciences. I would still say that person is highly intelligent but on a different level. There are those who are highly creative..painters, writers, poets..and I would say they are highly intelligent.
By JustMe
April 20, 2007 11:38 AM | Link to this
SJ That is a loaded question!
I’ll take a 50/50 split on the initial meeting, but after that the scales are on.
T-Mango Intelligence to me is beyond just knowing facts. It is about learning and experience ^5^5^5^5^5
Who sings that song…….. Experience is a good teacher, It takse someone like you to know…..
That Thug in a suit is tryinta KIR He masters his books, but he is more comfortable in a common environment. That is a 50/50
That way, one could have an upscale and a cool like dat! lifestyle.
By Island Girl
April 20, 2007 11:40 AM | Link to this
Demi Funny…and a great ending too.
By T-Mango
April 20, 2007 11:42 AM | Link to this
Just to clarify…
When I brought up “street smarts” in response to SJ, I was not talking about being a thug. Thugs often walk on the wrong side of the law. Thugs live by the codes of the streets.No snitchin’, protect ya neck, etc
“Street smart” men know how to stay above board. They are savvy at navigating any environment that they are in. I’ve said it before…”he’s the one that can go from the boardroom table to the spades table and everywhere in between”. He’s a chameleon…or as someone said he’s the one that’s “adaptable” to their environment. He can deal with people on all levels and knows what is going on around him. He’s not sheltered from reality.
Yes… he can rock his suit at lunch with a group of execs at the City Grill, but beneath the surface he has an eye for recognizing game that may come from people inside/outside of his circle and deals with it appropriately.
Back to Lurksville…
By DuShawn
April 20, 2007 11:42 AM | Link to this
Demi I agree with your choice that night. I love a woman that gives good brain. By the way, now that you’ve deleted her number. You don’t mind if holla at Jezebel do you?
By JustMe
April 20, 2007 11:47 AM | Link to this
Demi You expected nothing less and you know it ;-)
By Museq
April 20, 2007 11:48 AM | Link to this
Between Ga Right To Life, Confederate History Month and the Gun For Everyone bill; it’s a SHAME that one has to sacrifice COMMON SENSE in order to have an ‘affordable’ lifestyle here in bassackwards Georgia. I hear Charlotte might be the next place to consider??
As for Sexi’s sense of humor, don’t quit your DAY JOB…LOL! ;-)
By Sexione
April 20, 2007 11:49 AM | Link to this
What makes someone highly intelligent? Good question!!!
T-Mango When I brought up “street smarts” in response to SJ, I was not talking about being a thug me either, as we have already said, there’s a big difference!!
DuShawn NO!! You can’t holla at nobody but your wife!!!! lol
By Leroy Smiths
April 20, 2007 11:53 AM | Link to this
Yo lets me tell y’all about my last date.Me and Rufus sat on the skreet corner over by Turner Field and drank some Maddog 20/20 we stoles from the stowe. After running out of some 20/20 we decides to go steal some mo. ON the way to rob the stowe we runs across a ho. I offer her 4 Newports and Rufus offer her 3 Black and milds. She tells me that for a 40 of BUll and the 4 Newports I can wax that a$$. Rufus gets all mad yo and I had to beat his a$$ before takesing my ho behind the flour mill and ramming it to her yo. I lieds to the ho and only had 3 Newports but I gots her the 40 when me and RUfus robbed the stowe. I enjoy dates yo.
By SlimOne
April 20, 2007 11:54 AM | Link to this
Sexione You are officially the “Stay-faithful-to-your-wife monitor” LMAO….^5^5
By Jake
April 20, 2007 11:55 AM | Link to this
What up folks:
Intelligence is a very important quality, but some are too smart for their own dayumn good. It is unfortunate, but there are some people who are so enamored with their own brain power that they are socially fustrating.
Some people are always “at the podium” wanting to display their IQ’s. Personally, I’m in favor of the combo woman. She is smart, she is sexy, and she is humble. As I have said on other occassions, I love women who are unaware of themselves.
By Sexione
April 20, 2007 11:59 AM | Link to this
Museq We all have freedom of choice….don’t like my jokes? feel free to skip over them….don’t like bassackwards Georgia, feel free to move on!! lol
Slim thanks, I knew that if I didn’t say it, someone else would have!! and he knew it was coming… lol
By Island Girl
April 20, 2007 12:00 PM | Link to this
Museq, Sexi had a good point yesterday…give up the stats (interests, kids, work, church, pic-will do)? We know you’re smart, but let us know more.
By kinderbabe
April 20, 2007 12:02 PM | Link to this
hey jake
By Sexione
April 20, 2007 12:03 PM | Link to this
Jake Heeeyyyy!! Where can I co-sign? I have a very special pen…..hehehehe
By Island Girl
April 20, 2007 12:04 PM | Link to this
Jake, I know a couple of folks like that. They use their “smarts” to make them feel secure and possibly bigger than the other person. Explain what you mean by, “I love women who are unaware of themselves.”
By will c
April 20, 2007 12:04 PM | Link to this
I’ve been to several political events and managed to meet a number of quality women. I met a woman several years ago who blew me away. We dated, things didn’t work but we remain good friends.
With the presidential election coming up, this is an opportunity to get involved and meet people who share your interest in political thought.
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101 Dating Ideas for Atlanta Singles http://books.lulu.com/content/59240
By For Real
April 20, 2007 12:06 PM | Link to this
What up Blog Fam!!!
I don’t believe intelligence can be measured. If it is true we only use 10% of our brain then how can we accurately measure a person’s intelligence? Also, I believe that intelligence means a person’s ability to learn. I read a quote recently that went something like this “Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance” So is knowing what you don’t know more important than what you do know???
By Demi
April 20, 2007 12:06 PM | Link to this
I need more…
I heard that KB!!!
Slim girl suck it up and put those blades back on. I promise to hold your hand next time, LOL
Lady J now that you aren’t yelling half the time, I enjoy reading your posts as well.
Lady D there is nothing like reading a great book and being able to share it with others, male or female. I call it read’n’tell…the adult version.
DuShawn LOL, not at all bruh…some where deep inside, I am kicking my behind for deleting her number.
IG tell me about it, plus I save myself a few hundred dollars by cutting geico loose.
off to lunch with Wisdom’s disciple
By JustMe
April 20, 2007 12:06 PM | Link to this
LOL Slim/Sexi ^5
By Museq
April 20, 2007 12:08 PM | Link to this
I thought this was all in good FUN. Perhaps I was wrong, sorry. Peace.
By Sexione
April 20, 2007 12:14 PM | Link to this
Museq don’t run, this IS all in good fun….but please believe that if you dish it, you’d best be ready to take it!!! Now come on back and give us those stats!!!
By Lady J
April 20, 2007 12:14 PM | Link to this
@Demi do you know me from another life…I get told that daily stop yelling and my name and I am like not yelling just talk loud!! lol and thanks you made my day!
By Mo (now known as Moeisha)
April 20, 2007 12:18 PM | Link to this
Demi there is nothing like reading a great book and being able to share it with others, male or female I need to co-sign that one!!
For Real I need a dose of Mint Condition, PLEEEEZE!!
Jake I like your 11:55am post!
By Rufus Rastus Johnson Brown
April 20, 2007 12:28 PM | Link to this
Leroy,
I let you win dat fite, and I wuz laffin my a* off while you wuz bangin dat ho. You needs to check fo dem adam’s apples, my man. Dat chick had a dick. LMAO!!
By SlimOne
April 20, 2007 12:32 PM | Link to this
Demi Before you promise to hold my hand next time, i’ll need to know how fast you can run. Those blades are no joke especially when the wind gets behind you. lol
By SlimOne
April 20, 2007 12:36 PM | Link to this
Ooohhh, Ima telllll….Someone used a bad word.
By Sexione
April 20, 2007 12:38 PM | Link to this
A FATHER’S RULES FOR DATING HIS DAUGHTER….heck, this is good for MOTHER’S too!!!
Rule One: If you pull into my driveway and honk you’d better be delivering a package, because you’re sure not picking anything up.
Rule Two: You do not touch my daughter in front of me. You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off of my daughter’s body, I will remove them.
Rule Three: I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys of your age to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off their hips. Please don’t take this as an insult, but you and all of your friends are complete idiots. Still, I want to be fair and open minded about this issue, so I propose this compromise: You may come to the door with your underwear showing and your pants ten sizes too big, and I will not object. However, in order to ensure that your clothes do not, in fact, come off during the course of your date with my daughter, I will take my electric nail gun and fasten your trousers securely in place to your waist.
Rule Four: I’m sure you’ve been told that in today’s world, sex without utilizing a “barrier method” of some kind can kill you. Let me elaborate: when it comes to sex, I am the barrier, and I will kill you.
Rule Five: As you stand in my front hallway, waiting for my daughter to appear, and more than an hour goes by, do not sigh and fidget. If you want to be on time for the movie, you should not be dating. My daughter is putting on her makeup, a process that can take longer than painting the Golden Gate Bridge. Instead of just standing there, why don’t you do something useful, like changing the oil in my car?
Rule Six: The following places are not appropriate for a date with my daughter: Places where there are beds, sofas, or anything softer than a wooden stool. Places where there are no parents, policemen, or nuns within eyesight. Places where there is darkness. Places where there is dancing, holding hands, or happiness. Places where the ambient temperature is warm enough to induce my daughter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything other than overalls, a sweater, and a goose down parka zipped up to her throat. Movies with a strong romantic or sexual theme are to be avoided; movies which feature chainsaws are okay. Hockey games are okay. Old folks homes are better.
Rule Seven: Do not lie to me. I may appear to be a pot-bellied, balding, middle-aged, dim-witted has-been. But on issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, merciless god of your universe. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I have a shotgun, a shovel, and five acres behind the house. Do not trifle with me
By Island Girl
April 20, 2007 12:44 PM | Link to this
SexiOne, LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
By JustMe
April 20, 2007 12:44 PM | Link to this
Perfect 5th date…. Rainy Friday night, JustMe N FunGuy Chillin, listening to good music, talking about life and experiences, all while sharing a few spirits and putting together a 500 peice Jigsaw puzzle. I know we would not finish that night, but it could be a small something that we did JustBecause….. Kinda like a team building exercise.
By JustMe
April 20, 2007 12:50 PM | Link to this
Sexione You are straight crazy. you need to be a writer for some comedian. You know Comedy Central still needs a Comeback Kid since losing DC! Heck You could just be the comedian.
By Dr. Kym Relationship Expert
April 20, 2007 12:50 PM | Link to this
WHO UNDERSTANDS MEN?
The nice men are ugly.
The handsome men are not nice.
The handsome and nice men are gay.
The handsome, nice and heterosexual men are married.
The men who are not so handsome, but are nice men, have no money.
The men who are not so handsome, but are nice men with money, think we are only after their money.
The handsome men without money are after our money.
The handsome men, who are not so nice and somewhat heterosexual, don’t think we are beautiful enough.
The men who think we are beautiful, that are heterosexual, somewhat nice and have money, are cowards.
The men who are somewhat handsome, somewhat nice and have some money and, thank God, are heterosexual, are shy and do not NEVER MAKE THE FIRST MOVE!!!!
11.The men who never make the first move, automatically lose interest in us when we take the initiative.
NOW ….WHO THE HELL UNDERSTANDS MEN?
Men are like a fine wine.
They all start out like grapes, and it’s our job to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they mature into something you’d like to have dinner with.
By Leroy Smiths
April 20, 2007 12:51 PM | Link to this
You best watch your damn mouth Rufus. I knows what skreet you lives on b&tch. I will tells all the hos that you are a snitch to the pigs and you want be doing no balling anymo. Next time I sees yo a* on the skreet by Turner Field axing the Braves fans for some change I am going to knock your gold teefus out yo.
By Sexione
April 20, 2007 12:53 PM | Link to this
A guy and a girl meet at a bar. They get along so well that they decide to go to the girl’s place. A few drinks later, the guy takes off his shirt and then washes his hands. He then takes off his pants and washes his hands.
The girl watches him and says, “You must be a dentist.”
The guy, surprised, says “Yes … how did you figure that out?”
The girl says, “Easy… you keep washing your hands.” One thing led to another and they make love. After they were done, the girl says, “You must be a great dentist.”
The guy, now with a boosted ego says, “Yes, I sure am a great dentist… How did you figure that out?” The girl says, “Easy… I didn’t feel a thing!”
By Lady J
April 20, 2007 1:02 PM | Link to this
Great Post Dr. Kym Relationship Expert…I know a man for each section and some two or three…It is amazing but that is thr break down…
By ronald j. williamson, jr.
April 20, 2007 1:07 PM | Link to this
atlanta sucks and so do you losers
By Rufus Rastus Johnson Brown
April 20, 2007 1:22 PM | Link to this
Leroy, you betta not mess wiff me. I’ll put da wurd out on da skreet about you givin blowies at da gay pride fesitval for crack money. Damn, you’s a crack ho.
By Sexione
April 20, 2007 1:22 PM | Link to this
A guy out on the golf course takes a high speed ball right in the crotch. Writhing in agony, he falls to the ground, when he finally gets himself to the doctor.
He says, “How bad is it doc? I’m going on my honeymoon next week and my fiancée is still a virgin in every way.”
The doc said , “I’ll have to put your penis in a splint to let it heal and keep it straight. It should be okay next week.”
So he took four tongue depressors and formed a neat little 4-sided bandage, and wired it all together; an impressive work of art.
The guy mentions none of this to his girl, marries, and on his honeymoon night in the motel room, she rips open her blouse to reveal a gorgeous set of breasts. This was the first time he saw them.
She says, “You are my FIRST, no one has ever touched these breasts.”
He whips down his pants and says… ” Look at this, it’s still in the CRATE!”
By SeanJohnson
April 20, 2007 1:53 PM | Link to this
@ Jake & Island Girl…just coming back from lunch but had to co sign the comments yall posted earlier…espcially They use their “smarts” to make them feel secure and possibly bigger than the other person.…”Think” they are soo smart but couldnt find there way out of a cul-de-sac if they got lost…
By The Truth
April 20, 2007 1:54 PM | Link to this
Maybe another approach is needed. Instead of putting everyone else in a category(Dr. Kim that is funny) maybe we can start looking at ourselves. Maybe we don’t have the right skillset to attract what we want in a mate. Maybe we haven’t been trained to have long term relationships, if thats what everyone wants. My neighbors have been married for 40 years and they fit like a glove. They never steer into each others lane. They are individuals and a couple. Their intelligence level appears to be the same and their temperment is also. They travel alot and enjoy everyday together. One night the fellas are all talking and he starts talking about her and his eyes watered, after 40 years. He respects her so much that it has spanned the years. He said if anything ever happened to her he would be through with women because he knows he couldn’t replace her. I have talked with her alone and she feels the same way about him. What I notice most is their mindset is totally different from people today. They know how to play on a team. I know this blog is about intellidating with others but since that doesn’t seem to be working maybe we should spend a little time dating ourselves and building the skills necessary to be a team player, if thats what everyone wants. Just a thought.
It seems we give are all to everyone and then have nothing left for the right one.
I’m glad I’m not a dentist. lol
By Wise Diva
April 20, 2007 1:56 PM | Link to this
I’m sorry, I have never in the history of this blog ever said this to anyone but..
Leroy and company, PLEASE STOP! you’re not funny, you’re not witty, you are just embarrassing yourself. ..after a week of wack comments, and thankfully being ignored, aren’t you TIRED YET!?
geeez!
whew had to say it.. I HAD to, LOL
By Lady J
April 20, 2007 1:58 PM | Link to this
Wow @ the the Truth…that was deep!!! This was a great blog day!!! I must say I am scared of self though…maybe as I age I can dig deeper but only a small portion daily!!! Wow!
By JustMe
April 20, 2007 2:08 PM | Link to this
Heck Truth You make me think PD#5 should be moved to 2nd or 3rd date. I really don’t invite guys over if in-house dating that soon….. but I could possibly consider it someday.
By GA.man
April 20, 2007 2:11 PM | Link to this
GaMan tries to sneak in so noone would tell
By T-Mango
April 20, 2007 2:12 PM | Link to this
@The Truth Nicely put(1:54PM)
By JustMe
April 20, 2007 2:13 PM | Link to this
That should have read * really don’t invite guys over for in-house dating that soon*
By Island Girl
April 20, 2007 2:13 PM | Link to this
Truth, Did your neighbors ever share with you what initially attracted them to each other? Just curious….
BTW, great post!
By Sexione
April 20, 2007 2:14 PM | Link to this
TheTruth interesting!!!
Wise Guurrll, you took the words right outta my mouth!! ^5
I’m out, everyone have a great weekend!!!
By The Truth
April 20, 2007 2:15 PM | Link to this
Wise Diva, I second that. I was wondering if it was some type of inside joke.
By Linguist
April 20, 2007 2:16 PM | Link to this
had to come out of Lurksville for this one..
Wow Truth you got it.. I mean you really did. That’s the kind of positive, affirming, motivating, encouraging post that gets peoples attention.. Keep it up and I may hook you up at the blog bar with the “Top Shelf” stuff…
By Jake
April 20, 2007 2:21 PM | Link to this
What upKinder, Sexi, Mo, Slim, Kym, LDD, Justme, LadyJ, all the lovely ladies. HeadNod MLB.
TGIF, its been super busy around here this week.
Island Girl, let me answer that question from earlier.
An Unaware Woman:
She is beautiful in all the typical ways, but the unseen is what makes her standout. She may look better, dress better, hold the conversation better than most of the crowd, but she would never say it, because she never thought it. Confident in herself, but humble as pie. She can take a man’s compliment, and believe it to be genuine. She is the same woman she was when she had that old Accord, even though she has upgraded to a whatever she is in now. She doesn’t look good in the Lexus, the Lexus looks good with her in it. It is just something sweet about her, you can’t really put a finger on it. She’s The kind of woman that other good women compliment nd actually mean it (ya’ll know women be frontin and hatin on each other…LOL).
A real live genuine lady!
By JustMe
April 20, 2007 2:24 PM | Link to this
Truth I read somewhere….
I’m not looking for someone I can live with, but for someone that I can not live without
That really stuck with me when I read it and I subscribe to that notion.
By Lady J
April 20, 2007 2:27 PM | Link to this
Hey Jake!!!
By Mo (now known as Moeisha)
April 20, 2007 2:33 PM | Link to this
Truth your post reminds me of my grandparents. Been together 60+ yrs and when they are together they light up a room. Yet they are still okay when they arent together, but constantly talk of one another. Mo grabs a tissue….having a “moment”
JustMe I am going to have to remember that..*I’m not looking for someone I can live with, but for someone that I can not live without *
By Linguist
April 20, 2007 2:33 PM | Link to this
GA.man Hellooooooooo !! I saw you sneak in here all late and ishhh!!
By Island Girl
April 20, 2007 2:37 PM | Link to this
Thanks Jake. I can understand why some men would be attracted to a woman with that kind of character. It is hard to say if a brother with the same character/persona would get the same adoration.
By Mo (now known as Moeisha)
April 20, 2007 2:41 PM | Link to this
Ling you are too much!!! Calling GAMan out for sneakin in!!! LMAO!!
By SlimOne
April 20, 2007 2:42 PM | Link to this
SlimOne sends a wink and a smile over to Jake
By Lady Dark w/Dimples
April 20, 2007 2:42 PM | Link to this
Truth Great Post! I can’t even imagine a dude tearing up after 40yrs…a woman too for that matter….unless it’s because they want to leave, but can’t! LOL
Jake I like that definition of an unaware woman. But I still drive an Accord. Smile
Will someone assess the late fee on GA.man he ain’t slick…
By JustMe
April 20, 2007 2:43 PM | Link to this
Mo it makes one reevaluate their available/desired level of commitment. I view it is a destination to be reached (10+, 20+, 30+, years) not a tangible object that I can touch, or a starting point for but a place I’d like to wake up in together.
By Lady Dark w/Dimples
April 20, 2007 2:45 PM | Link to this
Island Girl It is hard to say if a brother with the same character/persona would get the same adoration
why do you say that?
By abc
April 20, 2007 2:47 PM | Link to this
Kym, I don’t think that high intelligence would be displayed by an extreme math ability coupled with a poor grasp of English, grammar and composition, I’ve never encountered that. For the most part, an excellent mathematician will be adept at geography and other such subject matter. Most people of very high intelligence participate actively in one artistic pursuit or another, whether painting, creative writing, music, theater. All those subjects are compliementary, as learning and performing on a musical instrument will improve your mathematical abilities.
By GA.man
April 20, 2007 2:54 PM | Link to this
Dang…i was only 5 hours late..oops that dont even sound good typing it…. Demi i need some help with this one…i was working..it has been crazy the last two days
By The Truth
April 20, 2007 2:58 PM | Link to this
Island Girl yes they did tell me what it was but I’m not gonna tell. J\k. Read Jakes post and you’ll have the answer. He said the first time he saw her she was with some of her girlfriends but she was all by herself at the same time. If I had to summarize her I’d say she has a calm soul. I’ve never seen her flare up (and yes I’ve done busines with them too)and the most you’ll get is a funny laugh. Also, when you talk to her she appears to concentrate only on what you are saying (I wish I could do that). Mainly, from my observation, she is consistent emotionally. I don’t know if thats the way she is or the 40 years of marriage made her that way. I don’t think she would ever consider Halle competition.
Justme you summed it up friend. No more need for dating blogs. LOL
By Lady J
April 20, 2007 2:59 PM | Link to this
Peace out all!!!
By Island Girl
April 20, 2007 3:04 PM | Link to this
Lady w D/D I truly believe humility is an attractive attribute in a person. I also believe some men with this fine quality are often misunderstood and interpreted to be “weak”. I once dated a very nice gentleman who embodied a sense of humility that always placed him in a position to be pushed around (not by me, but by his ex-wife). I saw a lot of great qualities in him, but his agility worn thin and made him someone I could no longer be with.
By MusingLee
April 20, 2007 3:06 PM | Link to this
Hey All,
What are we talking about?
By Dr. Kym Relationship Expert
April 20, 2007 3:08 PM | Link to this
abc That was my personal opinion on intelligence. I was asking you What exactly makes a person highly intelligent? Is it just scoring higher than the average bear on the IQ Test.
By Island Girl
April 20, 2007 3:09 PM | Link to this
Truth and Jake… Ok, I get it…but I still say brothers with that quality will have a tough time with some women.
By abc
April 20, 2007 3:20 PM | Link to this
Well now Kym, it’s not as if I’m a neurosurgeon or psychologist or anything, but intelligence is measureable as a level of cognizance. Whether spacial, computational, conceptual, etc., increased levels of cognizance allow for greater abilities to take in one’s surroundings and analyze them, fabricate concepts and actions based on them and other factors such as history (memory), and take actions based upon them. Greater and lesser intelligence can be based on physical, chemical and other differences in brain size (bigger is smarter) and activity (more is smarter).
IQ tests attempt to measure that by posing questions of proportion, sets/subsets, sequence, etc., that appear as puzzles to solve.
Like I said, I’m not a scientist!
By Lady Dark w/Dimples
April 20, 2007 3:23 PM | Link to this
Island Girl I think I’m still missing something…the guy you describe sounds like a pushover…the person (whether male or female) that Jake described doesn’t sound like a pushover. Jake’s description sounds like a person who has it going on and doesn’t have to rub in the next person’s nose for validation…they’re self assured. I didn’t get pushover from his description….maybe silent warrior…because they’re something fierce with their quiet appeal!
By For Real
April 20, 2007 3:25 PM | Link to this
Truth You hit the nail right on the head. TEAM
Jake That’s the kind of woman I look for. Unassuming but when she want to she can capture a room.
Island Girl I agree with you.
abc and Dr.Kym How can you measure intelligence if we only use 10% of our brains?
By The Truth
April 20, 2007 3:30 PM | Link to this
Island girl I don’t think many people respect a man that doesn’t have some fight in him. The criteria for men and women is totally different, contrary to popular beliefs. No matter how advanced times get women are caregivers and men are providers. I can do alot of good but if I can’t provide nobody wants me. If you can’t comfort you are not wanted. Period. I think the present confusion comes from illegal lane changes. Women are strong where they shouldn’t be and men are weak where they shouldn’t be. Just my thoughts. Do you really want to cry at night with your boyfriend?
By GA.man
April 20, 2007 3:33 PM | Link to this
Hey atleast i beat Musing in lolololol
Trying to come in all kool….hey ya’ll what are we talking about
By abc
April 20, 2007 3:33 PM | Link to this
No matter how much your brain appears to be used (or actually is used), your intelligence can be measured by how much of it you can utilize.
By For Real
April 20, 2007 3:42 PM | Link to this
So if you can use all of the “10%” then you are intelligent?
By Jo
April 20, 2007 3:42 PM | Link to this
I’m VERY turned on by intelligence in a man & find it sexy. Looks are fleeting & superficial but it’s what’s inside that keeps me interested AND makes him look better, NOT “nerdy”, to me. I’ve had many interesting “intellidates”. My ex-husband was always into that too & we’ve attended concerts, ballets, the symphoney, protest rallies, etc, together. My current (& hopefully, forever!) boyfriend is brilliant. We often enjoy spirited evenings at home doing things like watching PBS & going online together. (Sexione, you are a TRIP! ROFLOLMAO!)
By Island Girl
April 20, 2007 3:43 PM | Link to this
Lady w/ D/D I interpreted the character to be introverted but confident.
Guys that have the silent/introverted confidence or silent warrior can be misunderstood. They are the ones who will see an attractive woman, but will not take a chance in approaching her. If she decides to say hello or complement him, he then decides to step up his game. He can be misinterpreted to be stuck up or even cocky.
I will admit my ex was a bit of a pushover….that didn’t work with me.
By The Truth
April 20, 2007 3:44 PM | Link to this
ABC intelligence may give you the ability to take in your surroundings but it takes bls to do something with that knowledge. Most extremly intelligent people (and please don’t take this personally)work for a person with big bls. Bill Gates would be an exception, he has both. AS Ford said, “I never graduated from school but if I hit these buttons the smartest lawyers/accountants/engineers in the country repond”. Learning is great but doing and knowing is better.
By SlimOne
April 20, 2007 3:44 PM | Link to this
GA.man & Musing You two look a little suspicious coming up in here around the same time. Hmmm?
By SlimOne
April 20, 2007 3:45 PM | Link to this
Did anyone ever wonder how in the sam hill can we measure the percentage of our brains that we use?
By T-Mango
April 20, 2007 3:46 PM | Link to this
It seems the conversation has somewhat shifted at points from intelligence as an attractive quality in dating to whether intelligence is a quantifiable entity.
That subject is loaded. It has been debated for years and it is controversial because historically IQ testing has been used to substantiate the intellectual superiority or inferiority of individuals on the primary basis of race.
For anyone that is interested, there are two books that I read in my master’s program last year that provide further insight into that question. I thought these were interesting books…The first is the “Mismeasure of Man” by Stephen Jay Gould. The second is “Bell Curve: Intelligence and Class Structure in American Life” by Richard J. Herrnstein and Charles Murray.
Have a great, safe weekend-
By Island Girl
April 20, 2007 3:49 PM | Link to this
Truth, As long as he doesn’t cry louder than me…LOL, but I do want to be hugged….(smile).
By abc
April 20, 2007 3:49 PM | Link to this
The Truth, I’d speculate that courage has more to do with character than with intelligence per se, but to say that those with intelligence inherently have a character flaw such as lack of courage is clearly spurious, or at the very least based in personal bias or defensiveness, not in fact.
By abc
April 20, 2007 3:56 PM | Link to this
Slimone, levels of biological brain activity are measureable using PET, EEG, MRI, and SPECT. Some regions of the brain show little biological activity, and different parts of the brain react to different stimuli, i.e., memory is one part, pleasure is another part, pain is another.
By MusingLee
April 20, 2007 3:58 PM | Link to this
Slim I was busy. Anyway GA.man already called me out on it…LOLOLOLOL
By Lady Dark w/Dimples
April 20, 2007 3:58 PM | Link to this
truth Women are strong where they shouldn’t be Can you please explain? I think I know where you may be going…but it’s a thin line and a slippery slope…
island girl Oh okay, I didn’t get introverted…I see where you’re coming from
By Jake
April 20, 2007 4:00 PM | Link to this
@LDD But I still drive an Accord. Smile
That’s good, keep it, I was just using that example for spice. How cool was that for you to throw that in with a smile…just what I meant earlier…the trappings are just items, the person is the prize….besides, no matter what you are driving, gas cost the same…lol.
@Truth Co-signing that 3:30 for sure, oh yea, my bad on the trouble making the other day..lol You didn’t run the man off did you.
Slim Thanks, and back atcha!
By The Truth
April 20, 2007 4:08 PM | Link to this
ABC lets not make this personal, its not. What I am saying is that historically intelligent people have worked for go getters. Its hard in life to have more than 1 superior gift. We usually call those people great. While I’m sure you know what a quark is, can you find a way use it to better yourself or humanity?
Island girl I thinks its a misconception to believe that strong men would hug you less. They’d probably hug you more. Hugging, kissing, and loving don’t make you strong or weak.
By SlimOne
April 20, 2007 4:09 PM | Link to this
abc yeah I knew that much but there could possibly brain activity that is undetectable by any of the means you mentioned above OR there could possibly parts of the brain that don’t serve a purpose….sort of like an Appendix. I believe i read somewhere prior that this organ may have had use back when man was still living in caves. But as for modern day, it serves none that i know of.
Musing I guess I’ll let you two get by this time. But for some reason, bad or crazy things happen when you two get together. After all, we still don’t know what all these buttons do in the remodeled blog bar. I’m scared to touch anything.
By abc
April 20, 2007 4:20 PM | Link to this
Slimone, since causal factors of electricity and synapse in the brain are mostly unknown, I’d say that noone really knows as far as all that stuff goes. Intelligence remains that which is displayed. As far as that goes, if one is quite introverted, people would probably not know anything of their intelligence — if a brilliant idea isn’t expressed, it doesn’t exist for anyone but the one who dreamed it up. Likewise, if that idea isn’t acted upon, it’s of little or no use to anyone (as The Truth is pointing out).
By Island Girl
April 20, 2007 4:26 PM | Link to this
Truth, I agree.
ABC, on the matter of intelligence…there are various types of intelligence as you previously mentioned (linguistic, mathematical, Kinesthetic, etc). With that in mind, I believe it is difficult to have a general measurable intelligence factor. IQ testing is based on statistical comparison which makes way for much argument.
By The Truth
April 20, 2007 4:27 PM | Link to this
LDD women are putting themselves in positions that they shouldn’t be. Work in your strengths. Develope your weaknesses. You know what I’m talking about.
Jake its all good. Randy will either read that and say I am weak or not. Either one is alright with me. Is there anything worse than getting dumped by a loser? sorry, that is insensitive of me. Island can I cry on your shoulder?
By SlimOne
April 20, 2007 4:31 PM | Link to this
abc what’s amazing is the stories you hear about children with disorders such as autism but how they are genius’ at numbers….remember rain man? They don’t fall in the category of what we deem as ‘normal’ but some exhibit high examples of intelligence.
By The Truth
April 20, 2007 4:37 PM | Link to this
OFF TOPIC can someone tell me why my mouse keeps flashing? Thank you in advance.
By Island Girl
April 20, 2007 4:39 PM | Link to this
Truth, You can cry on my shoulders…just bring the kleenex. LOL
By abc
April 20, 2007 4:42 PM | Link to this
Yeah Slim, I’ve known some people like that. One guy had a 50/50 chance of getting his shoes on the right foot, but when he sat down in front of a piano, it was magic.
By Jake
April 20, 2007 4:44 PM | Link to this
@Truth
My mouse was doing that ish too…the Others are watching…LOL
I’m out ya’ll, be easy.
By SlimOne
April 20, 2007 4:45 PM | Link to this
The Truth Mine has been doing the same thing all day but only on this page….I was begining to think my job was on to me.
By SlimOne
April 20, 2007 4:48 PM | Link to this
abc things like that are sometimes not meant to be explained. It’s like they are trapped in a world that we are unaware of.
By Island Girl
April 20, 2007 4:48 PM | Link to this
Everyone Have a great weekend…the weather is going to be nice.
By kinderbabe
April 20, 2007 4:49 PM | Link to this
have a great weekend everyone.:)
By abc
April 20, 2007 4:57 PM | Link to this
No matter what anyone thinks about relative intelligence, whether big-brain, average, or below retardation levels, we are all just as God created us, thus beautiful in His sight. We are exactly as He intended, all with different attributes through which we can contribute.
Just the same, I likes me a smart girl! :-)
By Red Khezu
April 20, 2007 9:35 PM | Link to this
Well Dr. Kym, I thought I’d help you with your assumptions of men by answering each statement you made.
These are just my opinions, through the experinces I have had. Me personally, I have had it rough in the dating scene. I spent close to 10 years with my high school sweet heart, who I fully believed was my soulmate and she even “said” I was hers all the way up to the point when she left me saying that she was missing out on too many opportunities to have SEX with more men. Not to mention she lied to me about everything I valued about our relationship. She was a big part of our family and my family considered her as part of it so much that they helped us get a house to live in (which now I pay for soley). She destroyed my heart, and even today it still hurts, cause I put everything I had into our relationship, in something I thought was real. Now I am very gaurded when it comes to women.
I feel I’m a nice guy, maybe alittle rough around the edges but I feel I have a good heart. But one thing is for sure, if you are really looking for a nice man, you won’t find him in a Bar. Me personally I don’t like picking up on or being picked up on by a woman that might be under the wind (drunk), I want her to like me first in a sober frame of mind. Now that doesn’t mean after we got to know each other, going for a drink is out of the question, because I like my beer.
My advice to find a nice man is to understand that men have feelings too and some of us aren’t as tough as some would believe, cause we break down too. And also some of us are alittle dense (raises hand) so if you were to pickup on them, you might need to come direct. Heck I’d faint, fallover, and do a Homer Simpson spinning on the floor if a Woman were to pick up on me,(meaning I’d be Honored) but fat chance on that happening. Also don’t take advantage of a gulible man (raises hand yet again) because with a big heart they can tend to be hurt very easy. In a sense because what I have been through a Woman must prove herself to me, because those good looks arn’t enough, atleast for me. I feel I have alot to offer a Woman, so I must know what they have to offer me (it’s only fair yes?). If anything I said offends anyone I’m sorry, but its how I feel.