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AJC.com > Living > Blog > Archives > 2006 > March > 16 > Entry

Just One Night

By Wise Diva | Thursday, March 16, 2006, 07:30 AM

The Atlanta Journal-Constitution

Utah Jazz player Andrei Kirilenko told ESPN magazine that his wife of six years allows him to have one night with a woman a year - as long as she knows about it. Kirilenko admits that his wife’s suggestion was a surprise to him and said that he didn’t plan to do anything. His wife, Masha Lopatova, is also from Russia where she is a famous pop star. She is comfortable with being in the public eye and it didn’t seem to bother her to talk about their marriage so openly because her “whole life is on the surface”.

Mrs. Kirilenko feels that if she knows her husband’s “night out”, then it’s not cheating. She feels that by sanctioning a tryst with another woman, she is curbing any urges he may have to seek out many women. Her logic is that he would already have so many temptations as an NBA player, it would be unrealistic to expect him to resist them. She is quoted saying “What’s forbidden is always desirable. And athletes, particularly men, are susceptible to all the things they are offered”. Mrs. Kirilenko didn’t want to have a similar allowance from her husband. I suppose she thinks that women have no problem curbing their appetite?

When I talked to a few male friends about this article, I received mixed feedback. David Horton, a 30-something published author, said this makes sense because “Men are conquerors”. He thinks that the Kirilenko arrangement would be ideal for him. He thinks most men would love this kind of setup.

My friend Jackson, a 26 year old hip hop columnist, thinks Mrs. Kirilenko shouldn’t be trusted. He said, “What woman in her right mind would justify this to herself? And what woman REALLY believes that ONE additional woman would curb his appetite for new snickerdoodle?

He also calls a foul (pun intented) on her terms: “This is a psychological mind game his wife is playing. One per year? That isn’t fair. That’s too much calculating and decision making for him to go through. He’ll combust just trying to make sure he isn’t missing out on Jennifer Love-Hewitt or Natalie Portman when he decides to sleep with Lindsay Lohan.” Hilarious, Jackson cracks me up.

Men, do you agree with Jackson or Horton?

If a woman knows about the affair, is it still cheating?

Ladies would you offer one night to your man if you were married? What if it was someone you are dating?

I wonder if professional athletes will use Mrs. Kirilenko as an example to score one night out on their wives or girlfriends? Yeah. Good luck with that one, buddy.

Permalink | Comments (316) | Categories: Sports

Comments

Commenting is now closed for this entry.

By Miss QC

March 16, 2006 08:01 AM | Link to this

Morning Bloggers oh my this is a great thursday topic, i’ll check back later…have a great day all….HOLLA! ;)

By MissUnderstood

March 16, 2006 08:13 AM | Link to this

Good Morning QC and DIVA!!! How are you ladies doing? I wouldn’t want my man with another woman. It’s not right and yes it is a mind game. While she may know about the “event”, I think that’s just opening the box for more “events” that she won’t know about. It leaves too much room for error on his part. We know “men” are not the brightest beings walking around and yes they will try their dayumdest to use the “agreement” to justify further events. You know they’ll try lol. I’m home today, so I’ll get a chance to talk to yall for a minute.

By MissUnderstood

March 16, 2006 08:18 AM | Link to this

I wonder if Kobe brought this up? Afterall, he was on the spotlight a little heavy. lol

By MissUnderstood

March 16, 2006 08:23 AM | Link to this

Where is everyone this morning?

By Miss QC

March 16, 2006 08:24 AM | Link to this

Hey MissU what’s up lady, how have u been? i’m doing great just getting ready to get started so i’ll check back! WD great topic “Oh Wise One”

By MissUnderstood

March 16, 2006 08:28 AM | Link to this

I’ve been gone for a while…. There really is a delay with the commenting. lol

QC- I am well. Decided to stay home today. wasn’t really feeling it. I normally go in cause you know I gotta watch my new receptionist, but I didn’t feel like baysitting today. I actually used her as an example last night during our family meeting to explain work integrity to the kids. As if I couldn’t confuse them anymore than I alrady have. lol

By Perception is Reality©

March 16, 2006 08:29 AM | Link to this

Murning Blog!

Just popping in while ‘Massa’ is getting his coffee.

I dunno how I feel about this. I have to agree with Senor Jackson…the wifey is playing mind games! I love it!

Gotta run!!! Have a great blogging day!

By sJeaSexyCool

March 16, 2006 08:32 AM | Link to this

for me…this subject is difficult to relate to everyday circumstances because ahtletes and celebrities live in a different reality than most work-every-day individuals…but i would say that employing the so-called logic used in the instance would say to me that one night A YEAR makes no sense whatsoever and wouldn’t be enough…and if we further use that logic…then he should be allowed unlimited indiscretions at his discretion…as long as she knows about them…

By Scornednomo

March 16, 2006 08:33 AM | Link to this

Morning QC and MissU.

When I read this the first thing I thought about was my youngest son was about 3 or 4, we would be at my parents house and he would ask me if he could have a cookie and I would yes but ONLY ONE. I would give him one. Then he would go tell my father that I said he could have one cookie and my father would give him one, then he would go tell my mother that I said he could have one and she would give him one. By the end of the day he would some how have figured out a way to get about 4 cookies in all. That’s a man for you. LOL

And then one a year, is that a calendar or a fiscal year. Is that cash based or accrual. LOL I can the right person twisting and turning an agreement like to their highest advantage.

But to answer the question, Yes it is cheating. And if I let you get away with doing dirt then you will not be paying attention to my dirt.

By Newkid

March 16, 2006 08:35 AM | Link to this

Can you say h e ll to the no!!?!! I would not give my man/husband one night a year to sleep with someone else.

Good Morning everyone!

By Techbabe

March 16, 2006 08:38 AM | Link to this

mmmmm…this is a hard one….I definately think celebrity marraiges have pressures that us regular married folks don’t have. As much as I wouldn’t want my husband to sleep with someone else for one night or multiple nights or whatever…..can I actually say if iwas propositioned by say LL Cool J…a guy who I would gladly loose my mind for….would I be thinking about hubby LOL…but since this is far from any reality that I live in…I can see how it can be hard for celebrities and athletes.

But I just don’t see how it can be for just one night…wouldn’t it create the need to step out multiple times….

By MissUnderstood

March 16, 2006 08:39 AM | Link to this

lol@ Snomo how are you this morning? That’s exactly what I started thinking. He’ll be so busy with his dirt he won’t have time for hers, so there would be no need for her to make the agreement. lol

You are so right about the cookies…. They learn at a young age how to get more than they are allowed. lol

By MissUnderstood

March 16, 2006 08:45 AM | Link to this

lol@techbabe, I know what you mean…My boo’s already told me that if Jill Scott approached him, he can’t be held responsible for his actions. lol Whenever we watch CSI and Gary Dourdain is on he “mistakenly” hits a button on the remote. lol

Since we don’t realistically have those pressures, then we have nothing to worry about.

By Pandora's Box

March 16, 2006 08:45 AM | Link to this

@scorned…I love the analogy of the cookies because it fits so well! I think cheating is cheating, no matter if you are a celebrity or not. I think his wife is delusional if she thinks that he’ll only do it once a year. He says he has no intention of doing it, but just wait until the “right” opportunity and then what his wife sais will be in the back of his head and he’ll do it.

By Pandora's Box

March 16, 2006 08:52 AM | Link to this

@tech & MissU….LOL! My ex-husband and I used to have a freebie celebrity, that if either one of us had a chance with our favorite celeb we could go for it and not feel guilty. But in reality, I honestly don’t know if I could have done it.

By MissUnderstood

March 16, 2006 08:53 AM | Link to this

I’ll check back in later fam

By james

March 16, 2006 09:06 AM | Link to this

IF IT WAS CHEATING IT WOULD HAVE TO INCLUDE FRAUD, TRICKERY OR DECIET. OR, HE WOULD HAVE TO HAVE BEEN SEXUAL UNFAITHFUL. SO, NO, HE WOULDN’T BE CHEATING. I AGREE WITH JACKSON.

By THE FILTHY VILLAINOUS DK

March 16, 2006 09:06 AM | Link to this

Good Morning Bloggers

Better not let your Man have a one time get out of jail free pass, cause hers might be better than yours ala Angelina and Jennifer..

By DasKrait2

March 16, 2006 09:08 AM | Link to this

If a woman knows about the affair, is it still cheating?

“knows” should be “condones”; abit of a distinction there.

I agree with Horton but Jackson sure has a point. What to do, what to do? Okay, decision made, it would be Natalie. LOL

This concept is something I have stated since maybe my third/fourth post. Is it really cheating if the other partner is okay with it?

Good Morning ALL, have not read the posts yet, so be forewarned: I MAY be BACK. chuckle

By Rell

March 16, 2006 09:15 AM | Link to this

WHOA, Diva…pandora box will be open today..i asked something similiar a couple post back about the “three-screw”…is that cheating or just a couple doing them.

On-topic…it is a control thing for the lady, she is trying to control and uncontrollable situation..dude gets offered the p in every NBA city..so for her piece of mine she has this little “arrangement” to lean on when things get confusing for her…

By runninatl

March 16, 2006 09:16 AM | Link to this

Morning all.

I think this subject all boils down to the preferences of a man and woman as a couple. That is why we have polygamists, swingers, etc. As far as Jackson’s and Horton’s comments, they are willing to do what suits them and their individual lifestyles. So it’s hard to pass judgment on a lifestyle I know little about and would never be a part of.

I also believe the whole idea of granting 1 one night stand per year takes the fun out of getting your smash on! Part of the reason people cheat is for the excitement, sneaking away, trying not to get caught. Plus I wouldn’t want that situation to get flipped on me and my woman wanting her one night stand…lol.

Also, the lives of professional athletes is something crazy and a phenomenon of it’s own. I can’t imagine having beautiful women throwing themselves at you night after night, city after city. What a life!!! (sorry, had a moment). And Kirilenko’s wife is a pop star as well, apparently, so they are on another level altogether.

On a side note: I think the Georgia Aquarium is overrated.

By DasKrait2

March 16, 2006 09:16 AM | Link to this

@ PIR - I think 2Can has a copyright on that registered trademark symbol, on this blog at least. (chuckling my © off)

By Rell

March 16, 2006 09:17 AM | Link to this

What up MissU, long time no blog….how is life treating you lady

By TopShelf77

March 16, 2006 09:24 AM | Link to this

I wonder how the whole ..I gave him a “1 day free pass” thing will play out in the inevitable divorce proceedings?

By 2 can play that game©

March 16, 2006 09:33 AM | Link to this

morning…..Das, you’re a character… not much to add onto this topic….

“I can shoulder lean, I’on know how to dance, though”……..say what you want, that shyt is hot!!!!!

By runninatl

March 16, 2006 09:34 AM | Link to this

@TopShelf77 It might be a factor in the divorce if you had something in writing but even that is still weak.

By Melody

March 16, 2006 09:34 AM | Link to this

I wouldn’t call it cheating if I know prior to the affair. But let’s be realistic, what man or conqueror is going to tell you of his plans to conquer a piece. Im comfortable knowing who my boyfriend finds attractive. But I don’t think either of us would be at ease with…”Um baby, Im going to do her, ok?”… A mouth can say anything, but when its in your face, it feels alot different. So Hell no, I would not offer my man a freebie. Im of the school that boys will be boys and they do what they do. If your man is going to cheat, nothing you do or say will stop or curb that! All I ask is that if my man cheats, to please be very discreet and by all means protect us from disease! I want to be blissfully ignorant of his trists with other women. You can’t control another person, but be smart enough to not let me find out about it. And the average man can’t cheat without a trace!

Ladies would you offer one night to your man if you were married? What if it was someone you are dating?

By Tazzee

March 16, 2006 09:37 AM | Link to this

Morning all!

Been busy the past few days and trying to lurk. I just have one request - can ajc.com please put a link to this blog back on the front page? - it’s so much more convenient for me when I find time in my day to pop in.

Good topics yesterday and today Diva.

By Perception is Reality™

March 16, 2006 09:37 AM | Link to this

duly noted dask! ;)

By db

March 16, 2006 09:38 AM | Link to this

Hey… whatever floats their boats. If they are cool with it, then I am. There are plenty of couples out here that lead alternative lifestyles. Threesomes, swinging, etc., happen every day. If they don’t feel like it’s cheating, then it’s not cheating. It’s as simple as that.

By Techbabe

March 16, 2006 09:39 AM | Link to this

@Melody…so your saying it’s OK for your man to cheat aslong as you don’t know and he uses protection?

By Rell

March 16, 2006 09:43 AM | Link to this

My gurl got a girlfriend, Chevy blue like whirlwind — yea that ish is hot….that is my 285 ride music..along with the leak i have of the “King” by T.I.

By 2 can play that game©

March 16, 2006 09:51 AM | Link to this

Rell, that joint is bangin ain’t it….me and the Be Be’s were blastin it this weekend, folks were lookin at us like we were crazy…Jr. bouncin wit it, and lil mama doin her thang!!!!

By DasKrait2

March 16, 2006 09:52 AM | Link to this

LOL @ PIR and 2.

TAZ - did you talk your new employers into giving you web access? thought you were shut out at work. Temporary, it seems. Just save this page into your main faves, and then link to the new subject on top left the next day, and then save that, each day. easy way to bypass the main ajc page. I go there but it is much later in the day.

By runninatl

March 16, 2006 09:53 AM | Link to this

My thoughts exactlt db.

By JAO

March 16, 2006 09:53 AM | Link to this

Obviously as a male I don’t’ think it’s an issue. The fact of the matter is we all have cheated or were cheated on once or twice. IT’S JUST SEX… On the other hand an affair is different. I can condone casual sex, but cultivating another relationship is when you cross the line.

By sjea

March 16, 2006 09:56 AM | Link to this

2cptg…rell….whatchU know about ‘dat?…has me planning to go see the movie ATL…yeah, folks…i’m a little bit hood…

By Pandora's Box

March 16, 2006 10:00 AM | Link to this

@JAO that is some messed up thinking

By Perception is Reality™

March 16, 2006 10:00 AM | Link to this

taz…link this!

so it’s not cheating but it IS definitely infidelity though, right?

By Benny

March 16, 2006 10:02 AM | Link to this

Good Morning all. This one is crazy!! The wife is totally playing mind games with him. On the low it sounds like she getting hers while he is in the U.S. She is a freak.

Aint no woman in her right mind is going to be down for that unless she freaking like that herself. If he can have one, she probabaly has five.

Not for nothing he probably already banging all types from being on the road. I have a friend that plays in the NBA and he tells me all types of crazy stories about the road and the groupies throw panties at them like rice at a wedding…

By Rell

March 16, 2006 10:08 AM | Link to this

@2/Sjea…Not to go overboard, but this really gets me going crazy in the car..driving with no hands and all..lol

Btch i’m tha man, I I I’m tha man, got no wife but the white be my girlfriend, Btch i’m tha man, I I I’m tha man, got no wife but the white be my girlfrie — D4L

By JAO

March 16, 2006 10:16 AM | Link to this

PB: I know what you mean, and it took a while for me to understand but here’s my point of view. Would you ruin you life/family structure because your significant other cheated??? Hypothetically, you have a great home, two great careers, children are in private schools, life is GREAT, I mean pretty much perfect. Would you disrupt all that because you weren’t man/woman enough to take it on the chin??? For me I could forgive for cheating, but an affair is unforgivable. I know none of the men on here will understand my point of view but when you cheat it’s usually something that you regret doing, at least for me.

By NoStress

March 16, 2006 10:17 AM | Link to this

Game at its very best - its a dangerous card to play but yet scared money don’t make none - see a lot of so-called playa’s would jump at the opportunity to get the free pass but that is the very reason most cats get caught cheating - you didn’t think the whole thing through cause the little head don’t have long term goals. Ask Kobe!! Fellas let me educate real quick - women lay bait and they do it because they want to know something! Ya’ll ever get this from your lady - “well I know I put on some weight but I’m trying to lose about 15lbs though I really wanted to lose 20lbs do you think that would be too much?” If you don’t know how to respond to that question then you will be the one getting all shot up when you are getting your 1 a year because you didn’t know the only reason she opened the door was for you to close it and by closing it she was re-validated by the love you just showed her. Game man I tell ya though it shouldn’t exist in marriage but what can you do? And if you are wondering about how to respond to the first scenario your response should be “baby you are beautiful just the way you are” give her a kiss or even hit it if the time and situation allows - but don’t you dare speak on her losing any kind of weight because no matter how you put the response all she is going to hear is “your FAT” and you lose and don’t try the “well you said” argument it ain’t gonna work cause it doesn’t matter what she said all that matters is what she translated from what you said!! For the young bruhs out there I hope you are paying attention.

By Rell

March 16, 2006 10:17 AM | Link to this

who else is tired of the black family on black.white., they are killing me…especially when the wife was like i wish things would go back, so we would know who you enemies

By China Doll

March 16, 2006 10:26 AM | Link to this

Interesting Topic Wise…. Cheating is Cheating. “Give’m a inch, they want a mile, Give’m a rope, they want to be a cowboy.” If you consent to that craziness, what’s next. She get’s to move in and so on, and so on…..

By Pandora's Box

March 16, 2006 10:27 AM | Link to this

JAO yes I could forgive a one time cheater, I’m not arguing that we as humans are weak. But a habitual cheater? That’s another thing. Would you really want to live like that? Always thinking “where are they”? And to let your kids see that that kind of behaviour is ok?

By 2 can play that game©

March 16, 2006 10:27 AM | Link to this

Rell, after the first few minutes last week, they lost me…..hell, I only watch Sopranos and 24, anyway….besides the usuals (ESPN, CNN, A&E, History channel)

By aggressively witty

March 16, 2006 10:33 AM | Link to this

I cannot believe super dave is quoted as a published author. i know he is but damnit man it just sounds odd when I know from whence he came, partly.

I said it before and I will say it again, bring up stars and what they do is moot because they living a life that 97.99% of us will never have. They got a different set of rules. I wouldnt get away with no OJ or robert blake shyt anymore than i could get away with some Kirilenko shyt.

Although, MWP did say she would give me one shot on our 20th ala Larry David on Curb. But thats bullshyt cause she is saying that knowing that I will think she believes I am just a simple man and cant control my dilznick and in order to prove her wrong I will not take her up on it. she is right…

By China Doll

March 16, 2006 10:34 AM | Link to this

Rell I watched the first or second episode and the Black guy was buggin’, because the white guy could not identify racism to his satisfication. It was weird.

The White lady is too emotional!!!

Probably won’t watch anymore.

By TDub

March 16, 2006 10:35 AM | Link to this

When I first heard about Kirilenko’s wife’s comments, I was like “Damn he’s a lucky man.” Now I’m not so sure. Like a few of the other bloggers said, she is probably out doing her thing anyway. On the other hand, if he’s cool with her doing it to then I say go for yours! I mean who are we to tell other people what to do in their own marriage. Will and Jada do the same thing and they never looked happier.

By JAO

March 16, 2006 10:36 AM | Link to this

PB: Nah I hear you, your making perfect sense but “life’s a bi@tch like the mother from Blow…”

By Melody

March 16, 2006 10:38 AM | Link to this

@Techbabe- By no means is it ok, its just out of our control. If I found out I’d be hurt, but somethings were better off cause we didn’t know about them. I’ve been cheated on,sometimes I caught them and sometimes I just had that feeling, and Im sure there were times I didn’t have a clue. I appreciate the man who was clever enough and considerate enough (yes, that sounds crazy) much more than the fool who is sloppy, and blatantly disrespectful. Like a woman, when she does dirt, she knows how to clean it up, its ugly but everybody’s happy. Not saying I cheat cause I don’t but if I did, I wouldn’t be stupid enough to get caught. I know it sounds bad, but that’s how it is.

By db

March 16, 2006 10:41 AM | Link to this

so that’s what D4L is saying in that song. I’m am from the South (VA), but I still can’t understand a dayum word those cats are saying. Same thang with Dem Franchise Boys… whaas ha-ni-ninn!

By db

March 16, 2006 10:43 AM | Link to this

ya’ll would be surprised as to how many celebrity couples do their thang like that. It’s pretty common in their circles. Who are we to judge how they get down; they live in a totally different world than us commonfolk.

By China Doll

March 16, 2006 10:47 AM | Link to this

Melody — You are reminding me about something I think Steve Harvey said. “When women cheat, they do it in style, secretive, no change in behavior, 4* hotels, Exotic Island,expensive trips etc… when Men cheat, it’s cheap hotels,cell phones blowing up, washing off in the sink, major changes in behavior, etc” He made it soo funny.

By Rell

March 16, 2006 10:49 AM | Link to this

@db, don’t worry i have been down her for 11years it has taken me a minute also..to get what is said….lol, but i still hate the word folk,shawty,andthatswhatsup,hollaatcha boy-boy…those terms are waaaaaaaaaaay over used

By JAO

March 16, 2006 10:51 AM | Link to this

Melody, your living in reality. The truth is you have no control over that so don’t even pretend you do. Just brace yourself for the worst and hope for the best. A comedian once said “you can lock your wife in the house and bar the windows but if she wants some, she’ll have her @$$ up against those bars”. If you put such an emphasis on sex then it becomes taboo. If your partner feels pressured, you’ll never know when it happens and that can be the duration of your entire marriage. And that’s all I have to say about that.

By db

March 16, 2006 10:51 AM | Link to this

@Rell: “youalllreadyknow…”

By DuShawn

March 16, 2006 10:53 AM | Link to this

Good morning all. I could speak for hours on this topic. I’m gonna read what you all think first.

By Scornednomo

March 16, 2006 11:00 AM | Link to this

The way I see it is there is no right way to do wrong. Of all the dirt that I have done in my life no matter how much I tried to clean it up it was still dirt. Infact it became mud. OXYMORON: CLEAN DIRT.

By aka Brother To The Night

March 16, 2006 11:01 AM | Link to this

See cats from the Midwest understand all that. We listen to Bone and E-40, Do or Die, the Original 3-6. Basically a bunch of complicated rap styles.

Oh yeah on to the juicy part. Wassup Diva?

If a woman knows that her man steps out then it is not technically considered cheating. It is what it is. Everyone applies their own rules to different situations. Personally I couldn’t do it because I have a last touch rule for the women in my life.

By THE FILTHY VILLAINOUS DK

March 16, 2006 11:01 AM | Link to this

2can and Rell Man I been bumpin that shoulder lean for a few months now.. Young Dro has a Mix Tape by DJ Burn One and Young Dro called I still got that dro..

Brown Range rover that looks like pork and beans.. Red Black and white chevy now I’m Deon. Put dem lights up in my wheels now i’m riding neon..

By ATLChica

March 16, 2006 11:05 AM | Link to this

I honestly don’t think I’d have a problem with an arrangement with a few conditions. First, the rule must stand for both partners. Second, I’d prefer not to know about it. Discretion is a must. Third, Protection is mandatory. Fourth: It mustn’t interfere with our time together (i.e. must happen on the road or while the other is out of town). Fifth: Can’t be with a family member or anyone the other person knows. Sixth: Can’t happen in our home or any home that we share together.

Other than that it’s fine.

By THE FILTHY VILLAINOUS DK

March 16, 2006 11:05 AM | Link to this

Rell My favorite ghetto jam right now is Suga Suga’s “do it wit no hands” or Bow Wow’s “Fresh Azimiz” and for me to like Bow Wow he had to do something.. Oh and the New Scarface has been getting heavy rotation behind that is E-40 and TI the leak.

By Melody

March 16, 2006 11:07 AM | Link to this

@ Nostress- I totally feel where youre coming from. It’s all a game. I am one who had no game. I could recognize it, but I often didn’t want to play. The more I observed, the more I realized that I am in the game as long as Im in a relationship. I was getting played. I still struggle with playing for the upperhand with people, but I know if I don’t I will lose! The bottom line is youre in the game, play or be played.

By FitChick

March 16, 2006 11:08 AM | Link to this

Morning All.

Who am I to decide what’s “right” or “wrong” in a couple’s relationship? Even though Kirilenko’s wife made it known in public, it’s still a private matter between the two of them.

That’s similar to the premise of the show Big Love on HBO, where a man is juggling 3 wives and 7 kids. I can’t (and don’t want to) relate, but for some people that lifestyle is a reality.

For all you hoops fans, MARCH MADNESS is finally here! You have less than an hour to make your picks here for free and be eligible to win $$.

By BlackIce

March 16, 2006 11:09 AM | Link to this

What the heck ever happened to the sanctity of marriage? Doth that not meaneth anything anymoreth?

I guess it has gone the way of speaking with -th on the ends of words

By aggressively witty

March 16, 2006 11:10 AM | Link to this

PTI…did he just say e-40, bone, and 3-6 was “complicated rap styles”

buwwhwhahahahhahahah

I guess Mike Dyson and Zane are “deep” authors too.

By aka Brother To The Night

March 16, 2006 11:12 AM | Link to this

Lovin the sidebar conversation too. I’m a pretty professional guy do my business thing but at the same time I’m urban. I like hard core rap, spades, BBQ all that. Most women that I decide to spend any time and energy on are professionals. My question is has anyone had a problem with women they’ve dated because of their taste in music and expression. Mixed bag for me. Met a young lady for lunch in a park and she turned her nose up when I was bumpin some old school west coast rap. Mind you I turned it down before I pulled up. She had the nerve to tell me that she was going to break me of that! I told the chick I’ve been pretty sucessful rap and all and maybe that’s what I really like. Opinions are welcome.

By Scornednomo

March 16, 2006 11:13 AM | Link to this

Exactly BlackIce.

By THE FILTHY VILLAINOUS DK

March 16, 2006 11:13 AM | Link to this

Atlchica Nice very nice… I like how you think..

By ATLborn

March 16, 2006 11:13 AM | Link to this

Good topic Wise!

I think it’s cheating regardless. Marriage is a sacred entity where you’re suppose to cherish one another. Giving someone a free pass to cherish another for even one night goes against the tenets of marriage.

I don’t know if Kirilenko’s wife is playing mind games or not, I just think she’s off her rocker.

By ATLborn

March 16, 2006 11:14 AM | Link to this

Scorned I like your analogy about your son and the cookie. I can definitely see something like that happening if you give somebody a “one-time” per year exception to go outside the marriage.

Hell, dudes would start getting like the dayuum Gub’ment…will go thru a full analysis and be like: “Baby my doctor did a comparative analysis with my lifestyle against my family medical history and determined that my life expectancy should be about 92 years. Since we will be together for the rest of my life and I’m 24 now that means I have an estimated 68 years left to live with you. With that being so, I will leverage the ‘one-nights’ I can have over the last 32 years of my life and spread that out over the next 5 years from now. Furthermore since I was sexually inactive for the first 14 years of my life and was unaware of the one-night benefit I would receive when married, I’d like to make ‘catch-up’ installments for the one-nights I missed during those years and use them on a floating basis over the span of my NBA career. I also retain the right to mortgage the 10 years prior to the last 32 years of my life and maintain those one-nights due in an emergency reserve fund in-case I exhaust the prior 32 and 14 years of one nights. Oh yeah, I do wanna inform you that I’ve already used 8 of my years on that 2 week west coast road trip we were on last month”.

By FitChick

March 16, 2006 11:16 AM | Link to this

BlackIce - Hey girl. The “sanctity” of marriage is relative, just as people’s believe systems are relative; they adhere to some religious doctrines and not to others as it fits their lifestyle.

By THE FILTHY VILLAINOUS DK

March 16, 2006 11:20 AM | Link to this

I’ll say this on topic.. Real Players dont cheat. They are not cheaters.. They are up front with it so they arent hiding anything. Just like a Pimp and his women they all know what it is from the beginning so it cant be considered as cheating. Now a cheater will lie, deceive and try to be slick about it.. Only to get busted cause he could have been honest from the jump.

By ATLChica

March 16, 2006 11:20 AM | Link to this

LOL ATLBorn. Typical man, give him an inch and he’ll try to take a mile.

By Tall&Lovely

March 16, 2006 11:21 AM | Link to this

@ATLBORN LOL, that was CLASSIC!

By db

March 16, 2006 11:21 AM | Link to this

Blackice: being confined to one person for the rest of your life doesn’t appeal to everyone, just take a look at the divorce rates in america. H3ll, it dosen’t even appeal to me at this point in my life. I’d probably be open to some sort of alternative set-up in a marriage or long-term relationship. I’ve done it before (to a certain extent) and it worked out for us; we stopped dating for other reasons.

By ATLborn

March 16, 2006 11:22 AM | Link to this

2Can, DB, Rell - I was on Bankhead last week and passed by the “D4L Studio”. Talkin bout Ghetto. A bunch of guys were standing outside the studio with dark shades on tryna look hard. Weren’t doing anything, just standing there.

Looked like it would be a great photo shot for hotghettomess dot com.

By aka Brother To The Night

March 16, 2006 11:23 AM | Link to this

Exactly some attitides being expressed on this post are the same kind of BS that keep Bush in office. If it ain’t hurting you, in your house, or hitting your pockets financially mind your business. People are going to turn America into the China or the Middle East before it’s over. You know what’s really sad about the situation nothings really changed much over the years we just got internet and better reporting so everyone’s dirt is on the street. If you look through history there is always a cycle of hedonism and conservatism. The conservative society always falls and usually rather quickly. Think about that before you pass judgement on others.

By Scornednomo

March 16, 2006 11:25 AM | Link to this

HAHA ATLborn your comparative analysis just about says it all.

By SDE

March 16, 2006 11:26 AM | Link to this

I would never allow my husband an opportunity to cheat annually. This broad is nuts.

By aka Brother To The Night

March 16, 2006 11:26 AM | Link to this

Witty I was saying complicated not that garbage that comes from up North most of the time

By DuShawn

March 16, 2006 11:27 AM | Link to this

@China Doll, The comment about how women cheat is so true. There was a time in my life when I was involved with another man’s wife. She was the top shelf, six figure, executive type. She would have limos to pick me up, airline tickets waiting at check in counters so I could join her on business trips, shower me with gifts, etc. I thought I was layin it down. When I really looked at the situation I had to rethink who was really the playa and who was the trick. Needless to say our relationship lasted for years and her husband never knew.

By Scornednomo

March 16, 2006 11:28 AM | Link to this

db Why marry if you need an alternative setup? Just stay single and have all the women you want.

By Pandora's Box

March 16, 2006 11:29 AM | Link to this

and we wonder why our society is so effed up.

By singlemom

March 16, 2006 11:30 AM | Link to this

Cheating is cheating. If you are in a committed relationship, whether it be marriage or living together, or what, and you stray out of that relationship IT IS CHEATING. Whether you are a “playa” or not, it is still cheating when you go out of the relationship.
If you are not happy with the person you are with, LEAVE…….don’t go out of the relationship for “comfort”, cuz if you stray, you are not happy with what you have at home.

By reality check

March 16, 2006 11:30 AM | Link to this

A much better arrangement is for a man to be single and do what he wants.

Her offer somehow makes me think of the blind man crossing the street who is led into traffic by his seeing eye dog and barely makes it back to the curb alive. As soon as he gets to the curb he reaches in his pocket and pulls out a dog biscuit and offers it to the dog, “here boy, here boy” A man watching the whole thing can’t stand it, walks over to him and says ” I can’t believe you are rewarding that dog. He just about got you killed”

The blind man says, “I’m not rewarding him. I’m just double checking where his head is so I can kick his azz”

By db

March 16, 2006 11:31 AM | Link to this

@BTTN: I was bumping some old Dj Quick & AMG yesterday driving home from work. I’ve never had a chick question my choice in music before. I listen to darn near everything. I got everything from Korn to Guns and Roses; Dave Matthews Band to Norah Jones. Hip hop, gospel, r&b, jazz, etc. I just thought about it… one chick said she was going to pull my “negro card” if I played my old school Metallica cd one more time.

By THE FILTHY VILLAINOUS DK

March 16, 2006 11:31 AM | Link to this

Atlborn The were doing something it just wasnt Music.. That whole area is a front for something else..

By Pandora's Box

March 16, 2006 11:33 AM | Link to this

Webster’s definition of cheating “to be sexually unfaithful” doesn’t mention whether or not the other person knows/condones it or not.

By Rell

March 16, 2006 11:34 AM | Link to this

@DK, i love the suga suga song ….i really like when i am at the “shoe show”…do it wit no hands..lol

@brother…i get the looks all the time i listen to alot of stuff, some days you might be WTF are you listening too…but on the days when i am feeling 88…i break out the old skool disc and i am woping in the car…lol, or worse when i am really feeling all VA i break out some go-go…then it over for me…lol

By THE FILTHY VILLAINOUS DK

March 16, 2006 11:35 AM | Link to this

Nomo Exactly thats why I will never be tethered by the old ball and chain again.. Find me somebody that likes my lifestyle and roll with her never marrying but doing our thang..

By Lah Lah

March 16, 2006 11:36 AM | Link to this

Hey my fellow bloggers. This lady is crazy to think that her NBA star husband is going to abide by this “one woman a year” nonsense. First of all he probably already has a couple of women on the side anyway. Secondly, men don’t need our permission to cheat. When they are going to cheat, they do so if we give them the thumbs up or not. I would never give my man/husband approval to be with another woman. I’m too possessive. I would agree to a threesome once a year before I would agree to him being with someone one on one. As women, we aren’t naïve about extra-marital affairs, it happens in some relationships. But that doesn’t mean we should just say F-it! Do you! No! I wouldn’t be able to comprise my values and morals so that my husband could be break his vows. Oh and just so you all know, I’m not down with the threesomes either, just making a point.

By Hot_Mama

March 16, 2006 11:36 AM | Link to this

I would go for this, but only if I was also allowed the same. But my husband wouldn’t consider letting me be with another man so it will never happen.

By aka Brother To The Night

March 16, 2006 11:39 AM | Link to this

@ Rell Man I was in Va between 96-98 we used to kick it at the Ritz and Live. UM was a brothers scond home on the weekends.

@ db I got that from knowing the lyrics to Freebird one night. LMAO

By db

March 16, 2006 11:40 AM | Link to this

@ Scorned: You’re right and I just might stay single! There is something to be said about having your soulmate share your life with you. If the two people are comfortable living an alternative lifestyle, then what’s wrong with it? I just think marriage is different for different people.

By DuShawn

March 16, 2006 11:41 AM | Link to this

@Pandora, If you your partners condones it are you being unfaithful? What if she participates?

By THE FILTHY VILLAINOUS DK

March 16, 2006 11:41 AM | Link to this

Bro Listen to what you listen to man.. Thats apart of you people shouldnt get on board trying to break you of anything.. They should accept a person for who they are. Thats just like if you tried to break a prostitute into being a housewife.. Could you do that? Probably not..

By NoStress

March 16, 2006 11:41 AM | Link to this

people create all these alternatives for no other reason than to be selfish and fool themselves into thinking they can’t get hurt in the translation - if you want to be true to the game then stay true to your mate - anything else really ain’t love just motion detectors on your insecurity alarm system, so you can be okay with not being enough for anyone

By Lah Lah

March 16, 2006 11:41 AM | Link to this

@DuShawn- So let me get this right. You knew you were the trick but you continued on with the relationship? LOL!!

By Wise Diva

March 16, 2006 11:41 AM | Link to this

Hey everyone!

oh…I wasn’t asking for judgement on the Kirilenko’s choices, I wanted to know if you agreed with the logic. Clearly they are entitled to do what works for them.

By 2 can play that game©

March 16, 2006 11:42 AM | Link to this

I’on know, ATL, I’ve been inside D-Lo entertainment studios, and their shyt ain’t too far behind, either, when it comes to ghetto…..but they keep they Garcia Vegas in the air!!!!!

By Rell

March 16, 2006 11:44 AM | Link to this

@Hot_mama…that is what i know alot of women know-a-days would be down for the three screw with no problem…but they would want there partner to return the favor with the MFM combo….and that for any self professed “pimp”..is the lynchpin that seperates the pimps from the simps..feel me

By DuShawn

March 16, 2006 11:45 AM | Link to this

@Pandora, If you your partners condones it are you being unfaithful? What if she participates?

By Scornednomo

March 16, 2006 11:45 AM | Link to this

@LahLah I would agree to a threesome once a year before I would agree to him being with someone one on one.

Soooo, it would not be considered infidelity or cheating as long as you are taking part in it?

By Gerald

March 16, 2006 11:46 AM | Link to this

Mrs. Lapatova has never heard the phrase “give him an inch, and he’ll take a mile”. If they agree to this, it must be two sided. What man would agree to let his wife “sleep” with another man? This is foolisness!

By DuShawn

March 16, 2006 11:47 AM | Link to this

@Lah Lah In the words of Bill Withers ” If it feels this good gettin used….Then use me up” :)

By db

March 16, 2006 11:48 AM | Link to this

@RELL: I still got a stash of old go-go cds and PA tapes from back in the day. When I get homesick, I’ll slip on a “shooters” t-shirt, slouch socks & Timbs and crank some good old Northeast Groovers, JYB or some Backyard. -ruff it off, ruff ruff it off!! Sorry.. I got carried away

By Lah Lah

March 16, 2006 11:49 AM | Link to this

@Hot Mama- you would be suprised what men would agree to in order to justify their dirt. My ex-husband once sat me down and asked me for my permission for him to have a girlfriend on the side. He said he would make sure I had everything I want (material wise) if I would agree to this arrangement. He then told me that if I must, I could have another man on the side as long as I would allow him to be with this one woman in addition to being with me. After I finished trying to scratch his eyeballs out. I realized some men will try anything to get what they want.

By Pandora's Box

March 16, 2006 11:52 AM | Link to this

@DuShawn yes I still would consider it being unfaithful. Not only to your partner but to the vows and the commitment that you made to each other. I may have missed the meaning of marriage, but doesn’t it consist of commitment?

By Rell

March 16, 2006 11:55 AM | Link to this

@Scorn — I would agree to a threesome once a year before I would agree to him being with someone one on one. — you are not alone in this…it is a growing trend..why don’t know…but trust it is getting wild out there folks fo real

By db

March 16, 2006 11:56 AM | Link to this

@nostress: for the most part you are right; but there are some folks how live an alternative lifestyle are are as happy as they wanna be. I know this old skool couple that have been married for upteen years and I recently found out that they are swingers. They figured out long ago what makes the both of them happy, so guess what? They are doing it. They are still married and enjoy the heck out of each other. Different strokes for different folks (no pun intended).

By THE FILTHY VILLAINOUS DK

March 16, 2006 11:56 AM | Link to this

What ya’ll know about Gray Tapes from Houston? I got gray tapes from Houston when DJ Screw was alive..

By Lah Lah

March 16, 2006 12:00 PM | Link to this

@DuShawn- You’re funny.

@ Scornednomo- I think it’s all cheating, I was just saying due to my possesive nature, I would agree to a threesome before I agreed to Mr and Mrs. Kirilenko arrangement. That’s all. I ain’t saying it’s right. Just saying if I had to chose between the two. Is this world messed up or what?

By THE FILTHY VILLAINOUS DK

March 16, 2006 12:00 PM | Link to this

Lah Lah That was funny you tried to scratch his eyes out..

By Lah Lah

March 16, 2006 12:01 PM | Link to this

@DuShawn- You’re funny.

@ Scornednomo- I think it’s all cheating, I was just saying due to my possesive nature, I would agree to a threesome before I agreed to Mr and Mrs. Kirilenko arrangement. That’s all. I ain’t saying it’s right. Just saying if I had to chose between the two.

By Mike

March 16, 2006 12:01 PM | Link to this

Come on, an NBA player not having sex with any of the 15 women that line up nightly to hit the lottery in the form of a sperm donation from a player? Who are you fooling? She can’t stop him, so why not act like you’re going along with it. They all have babies spread out wherever they play ball. To the women its like a job, they see a ckeck coming for the next 18 to 21 years. Its gone on with ALL of them.

By Lah Lah

March 16, 2006 12:01 PM | Link to this

@DuShawn- You’re funny.

@ Scornednomo- I think it’s all cheating, I was just saying due to my possesive nature, I would agree to a threesome before I agreed to Mr and Mrs. Kirilenko arrangement. That’s all. I ain’t saying it’s right. Just saying if I had to chose between the two.

By sjea

March 16, 2006 12:02 PM | Link to this

what ya’ know about that jam pony express?…my SM is one of them DSGB’s…he went home a few weekends ago…brought me back some new JPE…THAT is the hotness…but…if you ain’t from ‘round here or south of here….you might not know about it…2, holla atcha folk…

By DuShawn

March 16, 2006 12:04 PM | Link to this

@pandora If a man and wife have a threesome with another woman, are they dishonoring their marital vows to each other?

By Chink

March 16, 2006 12:05 PM | Link to this

@ No Stress what you are saying makes alot of sense. But the world we live now is too scary and people are walking around dead (no emotion, no conscious). Whats is so bad about loving one person and going through life together? I would be sooo open to my husband - weird, kinky sex, voyerism anything except anything illegal of course and all I would ask is just be commited to me.

By DuShawn

March 16, 2006 12:07 PM | Link to this

@Sjea Jam pony express. you must be from the MIA to know about that.

By 2 can play that game©

March 16, 2006 12:09 PM | Link to this

sJea, I was just about to mention Jam Pony Express….they put Screw onto that slowed down jam….

sJea, they ‘on know bout Slic Vic, Big Ace, Loc Cool Jock, The Red and Black….

By Pandora's Box

March 16, 2006 12:11 PM | Link to this

DuShawn no matter what pretty little box you put it in …. still infidelity.

By 2 can play that game©

March 16, 2006 12:12 PM | Link to this

and in order for it to sound good, you need an ‘86 Regal to get it poppin!!!!!!

By Rell

March 16, 2006 12:13 PM | Link to this

@dushawn, i have been asking that for days?

By runninatl

March 16, 2006 12:14 PM | Link to this

@db I feel you on that old skool but what about that Apache, 93 Til Infinity, and Special Ed. Good music is good music, I also listen to Nickleback, U2, Bon Jovi, 3 Doors Down, and Staind.

@FitChick I got UNC pulling out a sleeper championship repeat in most of my brackets!

@Wise Diva the logic behind Kirilenko’s situation doesn’t make sense to me because why just one night? What if it’s not good and I want a makeup night? What if I want a threesome? Does his wife get to pick the day, the girl, etc? So the logic is flawed because once you open up that pandora’s box you can’t control it or put limits on it.

Hey Tall&Lovely.

By Pandora's Box

March 16, 2006 12:15 PM | Link to this

DuShawn but like I said I can forgive a one time cheater ;)

By DuShawn

March 16, 2006 12:19 PM | Link to this

Pandora Infidelity implies deceit. How can it be deceitful if everyone involved is cool with it?

By 2 can play that game©

March 16, 2006 12:19 PM | Link to this

runnin, yo sleeper is UNC? Granted, I like them ‘heels, but don’t sleep on Gonzaga….ole Adam Morrison can shoot..I think he’s better than JJ Redick;

By Scornednomo

March 16, 2006 12:20 PM | Link to this

@Rell - So for example, you and your wife agree to the threesome and one day they decide to do the 3 screw permanently minus one, meaning you, is that cheating? Did she deceive you? or Did you put yourself in that situation?

By Rell

March 16, 2006 12:21 PM | Link to this

Lets go back shall we…this was the joint

Hey baby your hips is getting big Now you’re getting thin you don’t care about your wig Now Woolie Willie got a pair of my sneakers I wonder where he got ‘em cause I hid ‘em behind my speakers The object of your affection is the tree-top connection Or basically you love to smoke the wools The crackheads attract man they come up to my door I don’t smoke gems so what they knocking for Kids love to feel on you, feds got a seal on you Street time is limited to days On your crack card you’re getting only A’s and C’s for come back Damn it’s a shame you’re the mighty queen of vowels With a wide-eyed look and a rotten-toothed smile Used to walk with a swagger Now you simply stagger From one spot on to the next spot on to the next spot on to the next B*** get a job From me you won’t rob Cause I’ll smack you with a hose filled with sand Now give that to the crack man You was fly once now you’re losing all your fronts Started out light on the tip of woolie blunts Now you gained a stripe, graduated to the pipe Took a long pull…hype Yeah, head crack head crack You smoked up that stack and admitted you was fat (Hey yo X, wasn’t that your girl?) Yeah I had to drop her Cause she caught on the plastic and I just couldn’t stop her Slow down x5

By BlackIce

March 16, 2006 12:23 PM | Link to this

But then again…what business do I have in someone else’s marriage or relationship? What I believe, (faithfulness and sanctity within a union of TWO people) does not mash everyone’s potatoes!

By sjea

March 16, 2006 12:27 PM | Link to this

dushawn…i am from florida…but i’m not from the bottom…2 knows where i’m from…2, my illegal regal was an ‘83…you couldn’t tell me nathan…

By Pandora's Box

March 16, 2006 12:27 PM | Link to this

DuShawn ok maybe infidelity was the wrong choice of words, but I still think you are messing with the sanctity of marriage.

By runninatl

March 16, 2006 12:30 PM | Link to this

@2 can play I picked UNC based on matchups and I think they can get hot in their region. Adam Morrison is overrated. I’m not a Redick fan either but he does more against better competition night in and night out. I saw Morrison get bodied up against Loyola Marymount in their conf. champ. game so if you get physical with him then you can shut him down. Gonzaga has three physical teams in their region, Pitt, Xavier, UCLA, and even Alabama if they get hot. You get too physical with Redick and he’ll have 15 points from the charity stripe alone. But this is the most wide open tournament in recent years.

By Clete

March 16, 2006 12:33 PM | Link to this

and we ponder why families and society as a whole are going to hell in a hand basket. I sure hope there are no Kirilenko offspring!

By BlackIce

March 16, 2006 12:33 PM | Link to this

Brand Nubians right?

By 2 can play that game©

March 16, 2006 12:34 PM | Link to this

sJea….didn’t matter what year, once you obtained a Regal, you were a certified Ghetto Superstar! Regals, and Cutlass’ baby! Box Chevy’s are the new thang….

By dave

March 16, 2006 12:36 PM | Link to this

I was going to comment but this appears to be more of a chat room than anything else.

By Rell

March 16, 2006 12:36 PM | Link to this

@Scorned….you would have placed yourself there…price of playing….it could go both ways, i could creep with the third party…and yes that is cheating period….you have broken the agreement at that point

By Tall&Lovely

March 16, 2006 12:40 PM | Link to this

@RUNNIN, hey. I’m laying low today because this is a crazy situation and I can’t really comment but I am reading and feeling what everyone is saying. But also when it comes down to it what about the religious aspect of it. I know we are all of diferent cultures and religions, and in some this behavior is not only ok it’s expected. i.e. Muslims do believe in having more than one wife, and whichever wife he chooses to “be with” one night the other wife must chill in the background and she’s ok with it not only because of the reilgion but maybe also because she knows of the other wife or wives. Is it kinda the same in logic?

By TDub

March 16, 2006 12:40 PM | Link to this

@Hot Mama. Will you marry me?

By SDE

March 16, 2006 12:41 PM | Link to this

Anyone going to the single’s conference @ New Birth?

By Rell

March 16, 2006 12:42 PM | Link to this

The all time iamgoingtosmashtonightsweatysummerjoint…the hard to find

Doc box & B. Fresh - Slow Love….now that was the young love joint from back in the day

By 2 can play that game©

March 16, 2006 12:46 PM | Link to this

hell yeah, Rell, that was the shyt!!!!!!

By TDub

March 16, 2006 12:47 PM | Link to this

Can we stick to the topic please?

By Rell

March 16, 2006 12:48 PM | Link to this

Coming of age series for your next house party…feel me sucka’s

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00000346R/102-1565968-2293726?v=glance&n=5174

By 2 can play that game©

March 16, 2006 12:55 PM | Link to this

hell no, we can’t stick to the topic….

if you wanna comment on the topic then do so……..

By sjea

March 16, 2006 12:56 PM | Link to this

why should we stick to the topic?…really…why?

By Chink

March 16, 2006 12:59 PM | Link to this

I love that SONG “sigh” Doc box & B. Fresh - Slow Love….

Ahh man memories

By Rell

March 16, 2006 01:04 PM | Link to this

what about your uncles jam…the one with the michelob in his hand smoking that newport….and playing spades..background music (Pop, Pop, Pop, Pop) Goes My Mind - LeVert

ok, i am done…the no fun people are back..lol

By runninatl

March 16, 2006 01:07 PM | Link to this

Tall&Lovely I don’t it is the same logic because the Kirilenko situation is more about a wife saying “I know you make millions and women are going to temp you in every city all season long so I’m giving you one night out the year to do your thing”. I think that logic is flawed because once you start it, how can you limit it. To me it’s like saying I won a shopping spree but I can only buy one item, how can you give me a shopping spree then limit what I can buy?

Cultures and religions and alternate lifestyles are a completely different logic because it’s an acceptable practice within that culture and there are no limits.

By 2 can play that game©

March 16, 2006 01:12 PM | Link to this

damn the haters!!!!

Hip-hop heads, 107.9 is having a countdown for the greatest rapper ever…in addition to skills, I think longevity should be considered as well - having said that, though not a huge fan, ya gotta give it up to LL Cool J….dude been doin his thang since *Krush Groove, and still going strong…….20 some odd years!!!!

By motheroflove

March 16, 2006 01:12 PM | Link to this

Can I just interject? What binds you to to other party in the marriage is the vow before God. It’s not “I said them to you and you said them to me so we’re committed to each other.” We’re committed to the marriage before God because he’s going to hold me to my vow that I made until death do us part. You can do whatever feels goods or floats your boat but if it’s out of sync with the vows you took in the site of God, then you are accountable to God in how you fulfilled, treated, cheated, used or was faithful to the other person. Commitment to God, to the vow in turns makes you treat the other person how they should be treated in the bonds of matrimony. It’s the vows not the person.

By MusingLee

March 16, 2006 01:15 PM | Link to this

I think Mrs. Kirilenko is building her case for an eventual divorce, incase dude starts trippin. I totally think it’s a violation of the commitment of marriage. If you are going to get down like that, then don’t marry. Just have an understanding that when I’m on the road and need some lov’in, it’s goin down…. But I still love you (LOL)

By aka Brother To The Night

March 16, 2006 01:16 PM | Link to this

Rell A brother was jamming on amazon.

By Tall&Lovely

March 16, 2006 01:16 PM | Link to this

@RUNNIN, I understand that as well but who is to say in Russia where these people are from this is not an acceptable practice, which is why it may not be a big deal to them which is also why they don’t really have a problem sharing it with the public. Like I said that situation is a no different then what women are ALREADY doing and that would be turning the other cheek as long as the have the lifestyle, even the “common folk” do that. But I also agree with several posts that say she is doing her own thing please believe that. Pop stars have groupies too.

By E. Lewis

March 16, 2006 01:16 PM | Link to this

Does one night count? Yes

Does one night count as much as night after night after night? No

I depends on your circumstance and what you are willing to tolerate.

Don’t ask, Don’t tell didn’t originate in reference to gays in the military, it started with military marriages.

By sjea

March 16, 2006 01:17 PM | Link to this

motheroflove…what about people who don’t believe in god?…and actually…for all intents and purpose…marriage is a legal contract…governed by the laws of the land…and THAT is what is binding…

By 2 can play that game©

March 16, 2006 01:19 PM | Link to this

how can anybody tell someone else what to do in their house??? Just because it ain’t good for you, doesn’t mean it ain’t good for them…..y’all killin me with this shyt…yeah, society is going to hell in a hand basket, but guess what, you ain’t gotta join ‘em……You just stay focused, and don’t look back, Lot!!!

By Laney

March 16, 2006 01:23 PM | Link to this

Runninatl, I agree with you on TWO points today! First, that allowing cheating, even if in a strict “arrangement,” opens a Pandora’s box/slippery slope — it’s human nature to push the boundaries of what you’re allowed to do, and in a case where it’s this secret and illicit, “the rules” are bound to be bent and broken. Plus, I can’t imagine it’s much fun for Ms. Kirilenko to sit home that night thinking about what’s going on…

and secondly, I must agree with your NCAA picks. Go Heels!

By db

March 16, 2006 01:28 PM | Link to this

@2 can play: preach on!

By 2 can play that game©

March 16, 2006 01:29 PM | Link to this

pretty much the reason I can’t get down with this fake azz war in Iraq……could care less what Saddam was doin over there - has no bearing on me and mine - if his folks didn’t take him out, then it ain’t/wasn’t our job to do so….sovereign nation, sovereign household…..do what you please!

By FitChick

March 16, 2006 01:30 PM | Link to this

@db & BTTN - Brothas who actually love good music, regardless if its jazz, funk, hip hop, rock, r&b, etc. Music is my second love, behind sports of course.

another iamgoingtosmashtonightsweatysummerjoint = Turn off the Lights by World Class Wrecking Cru

runnin - Carolina won’t make it past the sweet 16, if they make it that far.

By FitChick

March 16, 2006 01:33 PM | Link to this

^5 @ 2’s 1:19 post

By sjea

March 16, 2006 01:36 PM | Link to this

i still want to know why this appears to be the ONLY blog on the ajc that allows your email addy to be openly displayed…i’ve been asking that question…for a minute…

By Ivy

March 16, 2006 01:38 PM | Link to this

Afternoon, everyone!

Whoa!!! on the topic. Keep it comin’, Diva. I love it!!

On allowing my hubby to sleep with someone else, that’s a negative. I know he wouldn’t allow it for me either so there’s no point in my imagining nor him.

Now, I did have a friend that got married last October. She and her fiance made an agreement that they each could have one last fling before their wedding. Their bachelor and bachelorette party was on the same night. He came home, she didn’t until the next day at 1pm (yep, they lived together). At any rate, she did her thing. I was scandalized. They got married and seem very, very happy with one another. I guess it’s all about trust. I’m just not that strong.

By DC Native

March 16, 2006 01:39 PM | Link to this

@FitChick - are you feeling better today than you were yesterday?

By runninatl

March 16, 2006 01:46 PM | Link to this

Laney got spirit, yes she do, Laney go spirit, how bout you….lol. Go Heels!

@FitChick if you are referring to a possible matchup with UConn, that team is definitely overrated, and even worse, they are a senior led team. I’m hoping UConn makes it past Kentucky and either Illinois or Washington, so the Heels can spank that azz!!!….lol.

@Tall&Lovely I feel what you are saying. I hope you are having a wonderful day.

By 2 can play that game©

March 16, 2006 01:46 PM | Link to this

sJea…..you know I’ve been asking A Lot of questions about this blog……for a minute! like - and Tazz said it wasn’t the case - but ummmmm, although Diva has her icon, why on the living page it only displays Laney’s???? But that ain’t corporate branding…..naw, I’on know what I’m talking about…..

By NoStress

March 16, 2006 01:48 PM | Link to this

@2 no doubt on LL - but we got to consider all around lyrical content and to me nobody did it better than Rakim when it came down to just raw flow not to mention when it came to the female rappers - Queen could drop a verse ain’t takin nuttin away from Salt but I think when it came to straight flow she gets the nod

By TDub

March 16, 2006 01:49 PM | Link to this

@2 can play that game……no need to curse at me bruh. I was just asking can we stick to the topic at hand and you had to go and say something like that. Dang!

By FitChick

March 16, 2006 01:53 PM | Link to this

DC Native - I had a bout with morning sickness here at work a few hours ago. I’m feeling much better now. I would have loved to go home to lie down yesterday, but I can’t just take off whenever I feel bad, only if it becomes unbearable.

By 2 can play that game©

March 16, 2006 01:53 PM | Link to this

sorry, TDub, my bad…..dang!

By Rell

March 16, 2006 01:55 PM | Link to this

@Fit…thats the spirit….people just do you, what works for you will not apply to your bredrin…lol, trust there are some crazy lifestyles out here….now on to the big dance…this year will be the year of the guard..even the small schools have some ankle breakin guards….the schools have really reached into the hood..you can see it in the open court style now…not many teams run the half court sets anymore…er body is runnin…on the low look out for UCLA, those cats are dangerous…and your boy Ronald Steele(Ala) is going to play his way into the draft…that all for now

thefirstcanigetsomestinkonmyfingersong = Tender Love - Force M.D’s…lol

By 2 can play that game©

March 16, 2006 01:55 PM | Link to this

Nostress…..you’re right, My Melody is still one of the rawest cuts ever put on wax….everybody emulated the R….

By TDub

March 16, 2006 01:56 PM | Link to this

no prob, dawg….dang!

By runninatl

March 16, 2006 01:59 PM | Link to this

@seja It’s not a big deal though, anyone can get a free yahoo or hotmail email account and use it. That’s what I use for all the ESPN and all the other contests I enter so all the spam goes there.

By FitChick

March 16, 2006 02:00 PM | Link to this

runnin - Kentucky is so inconsistent, they won’t make it to the 2nd round. I call my cuz (she LOVES UK bball) every year when they lose! The Lady Tarheels have a better chance than the men. They are tight as hell.

All you hoops fans, Don’t sleep on the WOMEN’S Tournament. They have got some great teams this year and those ladies can play ball.

By Rell

March 16, 2006 02:02 PM | Link to this

@NoStress…fudgingforgetaboutit….MC Lyte gets the Nod for the Flow..dawg….she would knock any female MC out the box, she was the original….of Paper Thin and 10% diss fame…..game over, male mc…for me it comes down to Cube/LL…those two hands down still lite the mike up when needed…period…but they all fear Knowledge Rules Supreme…feel me…

By 2 can play that game©

March 16, 2006 02:05 PM | Link to this

TDub, trust, nothing said on here is personal, dawg; it’s all love….though, a tad bit dysfunctional, it’s all love still the same….and ya gotta admit, that “dang” at the end just did it….hahahahahahaaa……

By 2 can play that game©

March 16, 2006 02:08 PM | Link to this

Fit, that ladies tournament is gonna be better than the men’s, in my opinion….you got either one of these teams that can take it - Tenn (always), UConn, LSU (I love me some Pokey Reese), Duke, and UNC…and Rutgers…then, the defending champs, Baylor…..gon’ be a good one…

By runninatl

March 16, 2006 02:08 PM | Link to this

@Rell What about “Spread my wings” and “I will always love you” by Troop!

By Rell

March 16, 2006 02:08 PM | Link to this

WTF….

San Diego’s Cox Arena, one site of NCAA tournament games, evacuated after police dog detects scent in possible suspicious package.

By Wise Diva

March 16, 2006 02:09 PM | Link to this

Man, I luv you guys to pieces

Hey Laney!

waving

By DuShawn

March 16, 2006 02:11 PM | Link to this

@everybody what percentage of married men do you think have cheated on their wives? I would say 80%. Also, I think Melody’s 9:34 AM posting regarding blissful ignorance was the realest thing written today.

By FitChick

March 16, 2006 02:13 PM | Link to this

@Rell - Lyte has one of the best flows period, regardless of gender, and could know a lot of “rappers” out the box. Paper Thin is one of my all time favs.

It’s all about the flow and NOT the pitch of the voice. Rakim is mos def at the top of the list.

By 2 can play that game©

March 16, 2006 02:13 PM | Link to this

meant Pokey Chatman…..

By TDub

March 16, 2006 02:15 PM | Link to this

Well being from Louisiana, I gotta go with LSU on the womens’s side. Pokey Chapman is the shyt. Hey 2 can play…..Pokey Reese is the brotha that played 2nd base and short stop with the Cincinnati Reds!

By TDub

March 16, 2006 02:17 PM | Link to this

Yeah you’re right, Chatman, not Chapman. And on the mens’s side my final 4 is Texas, Kansas, UConn, and Villanova….with UConn taking the title.

By i'm swiss

March 16, 2006 02:17 PM | Link to this

@sjea - good question… maybe since it’s the dating blog, to encourage “hook ups?” lol

there’s an easy way around it, though — check my email address…

By i ain't got no name

March 16, 2006 02:18 PM | Link to this

Watching the tournament online…

@ 2 can play: The LSU coach is named Pokey Chatman, not Pokey Reese. Don’t sleep on Oklahoma. Undefeated in their conference and the conference champions. My men’s bracket is going to hell in a handbasket.

By Jazzyone

March 16, 2006 02:19 PM | Link to this

Hey everyone…been lurking all day. They may as well have stayed single. Why get married if its a farce. Just stay together and have an open relationship..Doesn’t make sense to me….Someone will get hurt. The wife is probably doing her thing anyway. Maybe telling her husband he can be with someone else helps her believe that he isn’t cheating because he’s going to do it anyway. Often when two connect on a physical level One catches the ‘feeling’ and it’s trouble from there if the other party isn’t trying to go there.feelings…especially if his so called free bee is with the same woman time and time again.

By FitChick

March 16, 2006 02:20 PM | Link to this

2 - I agree, the women’s tourney is stacked with great teams. OU’s Courtney Paris is a beast, averaging a double double and already setting NCAA records. She looks just like her dad Bubba! UNC’s Ivory Latta is awesome. So is the Rutgers squad. I can’t wait!

Okla is 7 mins from being upset by Mil-Wisc…

By Techbabe

March 16, 2006 02:21 PM | Link to this

Is it just me…but I don’t want to be blissfully ignorant to the fact that my man/husband is cheating. Is it too much to ask these days that you SO is faithful….don’t get me wrong I know things happen in a relationship…but damn I aint going into it expected my man to cheat and hoping that he will be discreet and not bring any STDs home to me…if I think that going into the relationship I don’t want to be with him.

By Wise Diva

March 16, 2006 02:24 PM | Link to this

well actually Mr. 2..Laney is the AJC staff blogger, I am a community blogger. Mia also had the picture/image on the living section.

By runninatl

March 16, 2006 02:25 PM | Link to this

Jazzyone Sup, hope you are doing well…;-)

By DC Native

March 16, 2006 02:25 PM | Link to this

@DuShawn - I think it’s fair to say that people may have fantasy affairs or indiscretions , but to actually do the do in reality? Nope. Too much to loose and too much at stake. Also, you factor in personal beliefs and morals and I would say that your 80% is a little high, but then again it depends on the circles you travel in. I am married and know quite a few married couples or couples in committed relationships and out of about 12 couples, only 2 have cheated.

By FitChick

March 16, 2006 02:29 PM | Link to this

People marry for different reasons. I could give a dayum what people do in their own private lives if it’s not affecting me. I tell someone where they could go if they told me how they think I should live my life. Just because I don’t do what “normal” people do, doesn’t make it inherently wrong.

What’s the difference between what the Kirilenko’s are doing and polygamous marriages? In some cultures, having more than one wife is tradition and part of their religion. So are they not adhering to the “sanctity” of marriage??

By i ain't got no name

March 16, 2006 02:29 PM | Link to this

@fitchick: you are right about courtney paris. i’m loyal to my SEC though (auburn grad here) — tennessee will be there in the end.

By Wise Diva

March 16, 2006 02:31 PM | Link to this

I hear you Techbabe! My friend Karen always says that men have great PR when it comes to this sort of thing.

Do you think people would be as forgiving of a married female mayor that had numerous, ongoing affairs?

By Ivy

March 16, 2006 02:31 PM | Link to this

Tech, I’m with you on that. I’m not expecting my man to cheat, nor do I believe in the “men will be men” mentality. He knows that if he expects it from me then he needs to give it in return. So what’s good for him is good for me. If I can be faithful then so can he.

By Tall&Lovely

March 16, 2006 02:33 PM | Link to this

@RUNNIN, no you didn’t go back with troop! I will always love you used to be my song

By UNC-CH1795

March 16, 2006 02:37 PM | Link to this

I think that allowing your spouse, husband or wife (or otherwise these days, because you never know) to sleep with someone else probably isn’t the best idea because:

1.) lets say you give ‘em permission for that chance to go out and mess around with someone else for one night and they go out, do it and have a really good time (better than you or they might have even imagined), if your spouse has that good of a time with that other person on that one night, don’t you think that it might be possible that they may be very much tempted to meet again with that person that they had lots of fun with in the future, but without your knowledge or permission? It just seems that letting your spouse mess around, even for just one night with your permission and knowledge, would open the door (and possibly leave it ajar) to many negative variables to enter your marriage/relationship. What if your spouse or that other person or the both of them catch feelings during that one night-stand that you’ve condoned or that other person turns out be a Fatal Attraction-type. It just seems like you can open up your marriage/relationship to some very destructive forces by allowing or condoning that.

2.) and speaking of catching things….what about all of the other stuff that is out there to be caught other than just feelings? Would one want to take the chance of allowing their spouse to bring home something very unpleasant and very much unwanted and giving it to you after the one night-stand, like a bug or an STD? It probably wouldn’t seem (not to mention feel) like such a good idea after you’ve caught something red, painful, itchy or God-forbid, something uncurable or even fatal that your hubby or wifey brought home after said permitted one night stand?

3.) What if your husband were to get that other woman pregnant or your wife were to get pregnant by that other man off of just that one night stand outside the marriage or relationship? Would that seem like a good move to help the marriage then?

4.) Not to mention how horrendously bad this is and how destructive it could be for a marriage or relationship where children are involved. Not so healthy to their well-being if mommy or daddy runs away with what was only supposed to be a one night stand, now is it?

Just seems to be a really BAD, BAD, BAD idea all the way around with too many possible living nightmare scenarios to mention.

By Jazzyone

March 16, 2006 02:37 PM | Link to this

@Fit… Good point! Those thoughts were running through my head.

@Runnin’..Hey Big daddy! I am doing great now! ;-}

By aka Brother To The Night

March 16, 2006 02:37 PM | Link to this

Finally someone gives Kansas their due props there’s not a team in the Oakland region that can beat those cats. Plus I played ball with Brandon Rush’s oldest brother. Young man’s about to explode take my word for it.

By DasKrait2

March 16, 2006 02:42 PM | Link to this

Laney’s branded? All this time I thought those tattoes I see on women were decorations. They’re brands? More creative than cattle brands, some are color even. chuckle

@I’m Swiss - I think SjEA could figure out how to post here with some fake address(I have not looked at yours but assume that’s what you meant). She may be more interested in emailing to someone on another blog. and this blog is the only place that is possible, assuming it a legit addy.

By aka Brother To The Night

March 16, 2006 02:43 PM | Link to this

I will the beeessstttttttt.I will be your very best, I will always love you.

By FitChick

March 16, 2006 02:45 PM | Link to this

Wise - Hey girl. Would people be more forgiving of a unfaithful female mayor? Heck no.

The “men will be men” mentality still prevails. Just look at some well-known philandering men - Jesse, Clinton, Dr. J, Kobe, Cosby, Jordan. There cheating ways didn’t make a dent in their careers.

By runninatl

March 16, 2006 02:46 PM | Link to this

@Tall&Lovely Oh no doubt! I use to sing that in the shower in high school. That was on every slow jam tape I had, along with Silk and Shai…lol.

@FitChick It all goes back to a couple is going to do what they want to do, whether it is swing, cheat, whateva. It’s on them, whether it’s marriage or dating.

I’m scared to go back on ESPN, my brackets my be taking a beating already…lol.

By aka Brother To The Night

March 16, 2006 02:48 PM | Link to this

That was my teachmehowtoloveawomantherightwaysong. Stole somebody’s copyright but it’s cool. LMAO

By Tray

March 16, 2006 02:49 PM | Link to this

well the BC game has gone into overtime and I’m 0-2 on my brackets, great

By runninatl

March 16, 2006 02:50 PM | Link to this

@Jazzyone Glad to hear. Uh oh, I’m getting the warm fuzzies!…lol.

On a side note: why are people so mad about the Prince/Taymar concert? When has Prince ever performed at a small venue and for less than $150???

By Tall&Lovely

March 16, 2006 02:50 PM | Link to this

@BTTN sing baby! SING!

By UNC-CH1795

March 16, 2006 02:53 PM | Link to this

Looks like Boston College is having a lot of problems with the quickness of Pacific. Where is Pacific at anyway?

By aka Brother To The Night

March 16, 2006 02:54 PM | Link to this

By the way the cat with the sickest flow ever is definately Brother Lynch Hung his material was a little too twisted to go mainstream but the way he bobbed and weaved with verses and used words was always crazy.

By Kevin Wagner

March 16, 2006 02:54 PM | Link to this

I agree with Fat Chick. Do what you want to do, as long as it doesnt impact me.

When people think this way it clearly explains why more and more people are dying of AIDS and spreading other STD’s

By DuShawn

March 16, 2006 02:55 PM | Link to this

@DC Native I think what you said about the circles one runs in is correct. I was just thinking of all the fellas I know that are married, all but one has cheated. None of them have maintained ongoing affairs, but occassionally hit something new on the side when the opportunity presented itself.

By Tall&Lovely

March 16, 2006 03:00 PM | Link to this

@tray, I’m watching the ot now I have a tv in my office pacific is killing them with the three’s

By Scornednomo

March 16, 2006 03:01 PM | Link to this

I wander if Mase would mind me having a one night internet/text message fling with my blog crush? Do ya think he would? LOL

By Wise Diva

March 16, 2006 03:01 PM | Link to this

I wonder if the rules would change if dude brings home a kid from his one night outing?

By runninatl

March 16, 2006 03:01 PM | Link to this

@Tall&Lovely He doesn’t know the song…. “day and night, on my mind and every waking moment I try, to figure out the pathway back to you.

break me down with your kisses, show me all the things you need and I will make your special wish come true.

When things go wrong and you need someone to help you see you through…..I will always….

I will always love you, in the nightime…..” lol

That’s for you Jazzy baby!…;-)

By Rell

March 16, 2006 03:02 PM | Link to this

@UNC, did i not just say year of the guard….is this thing on, brackets are going to be crazy….who every has a high shooting % from the floor will win…the big men will be a non factor this year

By Tall&Lovely

March 16, 2006 03:05 PM | Link to this

@RUNNIN they are mad because they said he sang half of a song my girlfriend went to the show he sang half the song and then taymar came back on stage and of course no one knows who she really is and not only that they paid that money to see prince not her. It’s almost like false advertising. I’d be p*sd to I may have come decked out in my purple suit and all and THAT wasn’t even the song he sang! (F.Y.I. I don’t have a purple suit but I may have gotten into the spirit and gotten one for the show! LOL)

By Tray

March 16, 2006 03:05 PM | Link to this

double ot, unreal!

By aka Brother To The Night

March 16, 2006 03:09 PM | Link to this

Brother wasn’t tryin to do the whole verse runnin show-off. :-P

By ATLborn

March 16, 2006 03:10 PM | Link to this

DK - Yeah, I figured those dudes weren’t doing anything, ‘cept being on the lookout for folks on the inside that were doing something.

2Can - Oh yeah, so D-Lo studios like that. Dayuum. I’ve seen a few ghetto studios but D4L took the cake. I’m glad those bruthas making loot. Speakin of ghetto, there’s a ‘u buy, we fry’ joint next door to it. It’s the most ghetto joint I ever saw. The name of the joint is *SHO-NUFF SEAFOOD”. The waiting area in there is probably 5 x 5 ft, they got a bunch of hand written signs on notebook paper telling you want you can not do in there and you can’t they are inflexible as hell on their menu. Dmmit that signs says they sale crab legs by the pound, then that’s what they mean…don’t come asking for half a pound.

I don’t know if the lady in there taking the orders had a bad cold or if she just normally sounds like that guy “Whispers” in the movie Hoodlum.

U need to check it out, the fish is good. Those ghetto joints always have the best food. Guess there’s some law that states if your customers run a good risk of being shot while entering/leaving your establishment then the food MUST be good.

By Scornednomo

March 16, 2006 03:11 PM | Link to this

Diva it probably would simply because now someone else (the little bastard) has rights to part of that millions. Other than that she probably wouldn’t give a dang.

By aka Brother To The Night

March 16, 2006 03:13 PM | Link to this

BC needs to pull this out.

By DC Native

March 16, 2006 03:14 PM | Link to this

@ Scorned - we all know the answer to that one.

By i'm swiss

March 16, 2006 03:15 PM | Link to this

@Kevin - Dude, check your spelling… I believe it’s FitChick. Not normally a spelling nazi, but that kind of goof can get fella SMACKED! LOL

By cocoa

March 16, 2006 03:15 PM | Link to this

Maybe, since both Mrs. Kirilenko and her hubby are in the public eye, this announcement to ESPN Magazine is her way of keeping the tabloids out of her face. We’ve all heard about the paparazzi hiding behind bushes to catch a celeb doing dirt… So…if Andrei Kirilenko is seen out and about with the dish of the day, the tabloids will not think it newsworthy to publish, since she already gave it her blessing, therefore her hubby’s indescretion will not be front page or gossip column news.

By Jazzyone

March 16, 2006 03:18 PM | Link to this

@Wagner…Oh my its Fit Chick…don’t kill him Fit…don’t….ahh…stop…walk away from the knife!

By DC Native

March 16, 2006 03:19 PM | Link to this

@ATLborn - where is this???? I may have to add it to the tour of the ATL in May.

By Tall&Lovely

March 16, 2006 03:19 PM | Link to this

@BTTN, runnin showed out on you but you still did good baby:) BC pulled it out!

By Tray

March 16, 2006 03:21 PM | Link to this

BC did pull it out, lets go UT!

By Scornednomo

March 16, 2006 03:22 PM | Link to this

I really don’t get this groupie gig. Other than trying to run a “get rich quick” scheme (i.e. The Kobe Bryant scandal) or a “baby mama” monthly bank roll scheme, what’s the fascination. Does rich dck feel better that poor dck? A stick is a stick and a d—, well you know what I am saying.

By MissUnderstood

March 16, 2006 03:23 PM | Link to this

lawd lawd, see I had to stop reading just to post to back up uconn, then I will continue reading…. They do nothin butt spank azz so the heals will be very fortunate if they get a chance to bend ova….

Secondly, when my lil baller gets to uconn, and yes she will get there, eer body else might as well hang it up. She’s already sittin em down and she just turned 12….. Ok off my soap box…. I will continue reading.

By Tall&Lovely

March 16, 2006 03:24 PM | Link to this

@Scorn you know I justed started this blog about two weeks ago but who is Mase? And I want to be nosier who is your crush? LOL. But like they said if that’s your man you KNOW he would be a little upset. Actually I’ve had the dumb a** man who has asked to watch or join in SOOOO you never know….j/k

By DasKrait2

March 16, 2006 03:24 PM | Link to this

@Kevin - yeah, show some respect, She’s pregnant. LOL

her stomach would normally break your fist if you tried to punch her.

By runninatl

March 16, 2006 03:25 PM | Link to this

Tall&Lovely I feel you but my point was that when i heard about it, I was like Prince, at the Tabernacle, for $70??? Nah, he’s just there to plug this performer. It was too good to be true! LOL..at a purple suit.

@BTTN I had to get my props….lol.

By Jazzyone

March 16, 2006 03:25 PM | Link to this

@Brotha…unh unh…let him run it! Show it off big daddy show it off ;

@Running..Muah…hnh hnh hnh..Sing that song..okay don’t start none, won’t be none! ;-}!

@ATlborn…uhh where is this SHo nuff seafood place??!!

By FitChick

March 16, 2006 03:26 PM | Link to this

I was keeping tabs of the scores online when I aw that BC & Pacific were tied at the end of regulation. I had to go to the break room and watch the 2 OT’s. Pacific has no inside game and the big men of BC took over.

March Madness - I LOVE THIS TOURNEY!

Kevin - Dude, I hope you just used the wrong vowel in my name!

By runninatl

March 16, 2006 03:27 PM | Link to this

@Jazzyone LMAO at “Fat chick”.

By Wise Diva

March 16, 2006 03:27 PM | Link to this

LOL @ Scorned!! You are too funny, but really, don’t you think she put a bounty on her hub’s dizzle?…LOL

By TopShelf77

March 16, 2006 03:28 PM | Link to this

ATLborn

I heard them D4L boys use “Frooty Loops” for the majority of their production. Its a shame, but it is too easy to get into the Rap Game if you are in Atlanta.

By ATLborn

March 16, 2006 03:30 PM | Link to this

DC - It’s on Donald Lee Hollowell(everyone still calls it “Bankhead highway”)parkway. Get off at the Donald Hollowell 285 exit (on the west side of the perimter just before 1-20) and head inside (east) the perimeter. It’s about 2 miles down on your right, just after you cross over Hamilton Holmes drive. It’s next door to the D4L studio.

Don’t plan on taking too many of your folks inside, I guesstimate that only around 5 people can fit in there without feeling too crowded.

By Jazzyone

March 16, 2006 03:31 PM | Link to this

@Tall&Lovely..He wanted to watch you and another guy get it on?? or you get with a woman?? Thats just nuts…Ive had that as well but the guy wanted to see me with a chick…no thanks…

By i ain't got no name

March 16, 2006 03:32 PM | Link to this

@runnin & wise diva: i promise i’ll get that dating and economics chronology to you. it needed some work because atlanta is small and i don’t know who you know! to update ya — a couple more dates this week (including tonight) and two this weekend. good readin’ though, i promise.

“the blogger formerly known as jerry springer”

By ATLborn

March 16, 2006 03:33 PM | Link to this

Jazzyone - u got to go by there and check them out. Prolly wanna go during daylight hours. lol

By Scornednomo

March 16, 2006 03:37 PM | Link to this

Tall&Lovely Mase is the beat of my heart and the heat of my grind. (He is my husband)

By MissUnderstood

March 16, 2006 03:38 PM | Link to this

@Fit sorry to hear you weren’t feeling well…

Hey Rell It has been a long time since I was able to blog. I’m only doing it today b/c I’m home. At work I have to babysit my new receptionist…. I almost told her the other day, but I kept my composure, if you know you said something wrong to someone and you know the only reason they called back to speak to me is b/c they want to complain about you, don’t give me the friggin phone….. She’s real jazzy mouthed, and there’s a time and a place for that, and work usually isn’t it unless the circumstances are extreme.

By Tall&Lovely

March 16, 2006 03:39 PM | Link to this

@JAZZY man, woman he didn’t care I found out later, much later, he was a FREAK! I’m talking you can’t even imagine some of the things that were asked of me. But also girl what man WON’T mind seeing a woman with another? I haven’t met 1!

By runninatl

March 16, 2006 03:40 PM | Link to this

@Jazzyone It’s too late, it’s on and poppin now…lol. Don’t make me have to bust out the Marvin Gaye, Voyage to Atlantis, and Rome- “Foreplay”…ya’ll don’t know nothing about that. I’m gonna put them warm fuzzies on ya…;-)

By MissUnderstood

March 16, 2006 03:40 PM | Link to this

ATL I know that building. I haven’t been in that area since my divorce. I can’t believe it’s been two years…. When I get away, I get away. lol

By Wise Diva

March 16, 2006 03:41 PM | Link to this

hey Topshelf!! good to see you pop in this week.

Welcome to the new commenters

There are those of us that stray from the topic, and really it does become chat room like…however..some people have more downtime than others who pass through or check in periodically. So by the time a person comes in, those of us with more down time have discussed the topic. By 9:30 am someone says something off topic that catches on and the next thing you know, it kind of snowballs. It’s quite random, but can be very fun too. Everyone can feel free to stay on topic and those who want to keep it going will join in. You just may have to scroll past a lot of the comments.

To me…It’s about getting through the day without slapping your co-workers, so hey…whatever works. I do appreciate those who say “great topic” because I do work hard to come up with good ones! smile

By runninatl

March 16, 2006 03:43 PM | Link to this

@no game Cool, this read should be a trip!!!

By DC Native

March 16, 2006 03:44 PM | Link to this

ATLborn thanks for the info, I am going to add it to the tour. I will make sure that when we go that we (1) go during daylight hours, (2) limit our party to 2, (3) order by the pound if that’s how the item is sold, (4) stick to the menu and (5) try to blend in as much as possible.

By Jazzyone

March 16, 2006 03:49 PM | Link to this

@Scorned..see thats what Im talking about. Perfect description of you and your baby!!

By ATLborn

March 16, 2006 03:50 PM | Link to this

DC & JazzyOne - If yall want another ghetto eatery to check out, be sure to go by “JJ’s Rib Shack” on Campbellton Road.

They have the best ribs I’ve ever had. I think they must put crack in the sauce or something. Cuz you gon wait about 2 hours for your order but nobody gets fed up and leave. They gon complain like hell but nobody will leave. And they complain softly cuz if the ‘Tiny’ (the lady at the counter) heres you complaining she will cuss u out in a heartbeat. She clowned me hard the first time I went, I asked her if they had fried okra as a side and she went off: ‘Nic, WHAT! Do you see some dayuum fried okra on the menu? Hey er’body dis Nic think he at Church’s or somethin. Nic, dis ain’t Burger King, we don’t do it YO WAY. If it ain’ on da menu we ain got it. Go sityo azz down.

After you get over the verbal abuse and get yo food it’s great.

By i'm swiss

March 16, 2006 03:50 PM | Link to this

@Tall&Lovely — You are right about that… I mean 2 of a good thing is always better than 1 right? That’s why I married a lesbian. LOL Didn’t quite work out the way I planned, though — we’re separated. Funny thing, though — she still pops in from time to time for a little - ahem - “swiss cheese” (oh, that is sooooo wrong). Guess I must be doing something right… LOL

By aka Brother To The Night

March 16, 2006 03:53 PM | Link to this

@ Top I disagree the rap game has always been about hustling. It’s the fire from being broke that makes that first albulm a classic. I’m not saying D4L put out a classic albulm although you can definately listen. Alot of classic material was made from a keyboard and a simple drum machine with a loop. I got partners who can tweak a mike until you can spit a clean verse in the kitchen w/no sound booth. What really needs to be focused on is the writing and delivery. I say put as many cats on as possible but a brother would love to hear good Underground music again. The money has really messed up the game to me.

By Jazzyone

March 16, 2006 03:54 PM | Link to this

@Runnin…you better stop I’m telling you…bring on the warm and fuzzies love. Im ready for ya’…don’t slip and become my blogg baby dady!..Marvin Gaye, Foreplay?? All you have mentioned are some of my favorites!…Muah….

By ATLborn

March 16, 2006 03:56 PM | Link to this

Sup Topshelf! Yeah, those boys make some simple music but I’m glad they’re making their loot.

By i ain't got no name

March 16, 2006 03:56 PM | Link to this

@Tall&Lovely: actually i get second-guessed regularly about my non-interest in a 3-some or watching 2 women. believe me, it sounds good, but it doesn’t have to go on in my bed. i think kirilenko’s lady is a genius!

@everybody: where are watching the tournament after work?

By ATLborn

March 16, 2006 03:57 PM | Link to this

Sup Das,

Did you ever get a chance to check out the GA Aquarium?

Oh yeah, I went on my trip. MW didn’t let me do the Shark Cage diving.

By FitChick

March 16, 2006 03:58 PM | Link to this

LMAO @ ATLBorn being cussed out

Big Daddy’s and the Beautiful are cool mom and pop joints on Cascade.

By Rell

March 16, 2006 03:59 PM | Link to this

@ATL, yep tiny is hilarious..i have seen that before…but the food is off the chain…also add big daddy’s….omg…and delowe seafood…now that is a nice hood seafood spot expensive..but you get a heavy plate fo real….or if joe’s po boys is still open on MLK….

By Jazzyone

March 16, 2006 03:59 PM | Link to this

@ Atlborn..okay thanks for the info I’ll have to try it sometime…Im having a soul food cravin’..but where is this Sho Nuff Seafood joint located??…and has anyone had Bankhead Fish…oh lawd it’s so good I could cry!

Sorry Wise…I digress…

By Kevin Wagner

March 16, 2006 04:00 PM | Link to this

@ FIT CHICK. simple mistake, just reading through all of the post too quickly.

By Jazzyone

March 16, 2006 04:01 PM | Link to this

Okay Jazzy is out for the day.. Ya’ll be easy!… @Runnin…peace and love and some suga for ya…muah..muah..muah..with your tall fine self! dayumm God was good when he created man!…

By Lah Lah

March 16, 2006 04:09 PM | Link to this

@ATL BORN- LOL!!! Only in the hood would we take the verbal abuse in exchange for a plate of ribs…. I bet you know now to go in, order your food and sit your azz down somewhere. And I know if I ever go to that spot, I will do the same.

By ATLborn

March 16, 2006 04:09 PM | Link to this

Sup Jazzy - Scroll up to my 3:30 post, I gave directions to Sho Nuff then.

I have never had Bankhead Seafood. No matter what time I go by there they’re closed. Kinda like JJ’s usta be. U can only catch JJ’s open on Thurs, Fri, and Sat. from noon till whenever the crowd dies down.

By Tray

March 16, 2006 04:09 PM | Link to this

yo Wise interesting topic! = )

By runninatl

March 16, 2006 04:10 PM | Link to this

@Jazzyone It’s too late, I gotcha! I’m going old skool on ya…..

Jazzy, do you like flirting with runninatl and want him to be your blog baby daddy? Circle your answer:

YES NO

LMAO.

By ATLborn

March 16, 2006 04:11 PM | Link to this

Fit and Rell - I haven’t made it to Big daddy’s yet but will have to check them out. I’ll try Delowe Seafood.

Yall should check out Merkerson’s Fish Market by the West End, they fry fish, shrimp and crab like nobody’s bizness.

Fit - The Beautiful is my spot. When my wife’s folks come to town that’s the only place they wanna eat.

By runninatl

March 16, 2006 04:12 PM | Link to this

@Kevin It’s all good, it was a funny typo.

I’m out, ya’ll helped through my day again, much luv for ya! It’s home to watch the Maddness and do homework…:-(

Stay blessed….

By MissUnderstood

March 16, 2006 04:13 PM | Link to this

Yall making me hungry talking bout food. It’s too early for dinner, and if I go to Happy Hour, I will eat and that’ll mess up everything….. Dayum, Dayum, Dayum…..

Glad I got a chance to talk just a little with my Fam today….2morrow is back to work as usual….

By DC Native

March 16, 2006 04:14 PM | Link to this

ATLborn and FitChick thanks for the info, we will add them to the tour. We tend to like to visit the local and neighborhood establishments as much as the chain ones. Helps to give you a sense of the neighborhood and environment. The last time we came to ATL, my relatives took us to some pizza/burger/bar/pool place that my aunt’s family owned and my husband still talks about how wonderful it was to this day.

I am looking forward to seeing Tiny!

By ATLborn

March 16, 2006 04:14 PM | Link to this

Lah Lah - yeah u know it. I give it back to her now that we’re cool.

It’s funny how everyone be in there mad as hell at how long it takes to get their food and they swear they ain’t coming back, yet they sit right there and wait til they get their order and you see them in there the next weekend.

By MissUnderstood

March 16, 2006 04:14 PM | Link to this

BTW DIVA I like how they made your symbol with much tude. lol

By Lah Lah

March 16, 2006 04:15 PM | Link to this

Hey ya’ll, I don’t have a seafood/soulfood craving. But I do have a craving for a tall, dark, handsome, single, intellegent, respectfull, STRAIT man. Can anybody give me directions to that. Where all the good men at?

By NotMyProblem

March 16, 2006 04:16 PM | Link to this

Good Lord - do any of the people blogging on here speak normal English? I’ve never read so many ghetto-speak posts in my entire life.

By Tall&Lovely

March 16, 2006 04:16 PM | Link to this

Everybody have a good night, enjoy the games, blog ya’ll tomorrow.

@runnin, now you have me curious about what you and jazz have going on in here another love connection!

By DasKrait2

March 16, 2006 04:16 PM | Link to this

Oh yeah, I went on my trip. MW didn’t let me do the Shark Cage diving

shame, shame LOL

Hi,

no, have yet to make the aquarium, seems it no longer to be a family affair, my sister got married and went to downtown ATL for her honeymoon, did the aquarium then. so doubt she going to coordinate anyway, NOW. LOL She was the one suggested it be a family gathering.

speaking of Bankhead, went to NC a few weeks ago, took a wrong turn, headed south on 285 there, exited the next exit, there was no return, so I went right then right, then right again, looping all the way back to Bankhead, over hill and dale, west of 285, then back Bankhead to 285 for heading north there. I think I saw the brothers of those guys hanging out you were talking about. They were hanging out someplace else. Not in front of a music studio, though. LOL

By MissUnderstood

March 16, 2006 04:17 PM | Link to this

Another good place is Buck’s bar-b-que. It’s on Bankhead going east towards town. It doesn’t look like it… I was skeptical when I first went in, but the food was off the chain. I haven’t eaten there since I moved from that side of town, so I hope the quality of food is still the same.

By ATLborn

March 16, 2006 04:17 PM | Link to this

Sup MissU - So u know where I’m talkin bout. So that means, um, u usta live in Bowen Homes then huh. LOL

I knew u had some hood in ya. lol

By DuShawn

March 16, 2006 04:18 PM | Link to this

@i’m swiss, I married a lesbian too, and its worked out wonderfully for years!! Different strokes for different folks.

By MissUnderstood

March 16, 2006 04:19 PM | Link to this

ATL Is Merkerson’s still open? They looked as if they were closed the last time I rode by…. Maybe they’re just open on certain days now.

By Wise Diva

March 16, 2006 04:20 PM | Link to this

LOL @ Miss U…isn’t that hilarious!..AJC’s art department did a great job capturing that diva attitude. .LOL sigh

and someone emailed me asking if my weapons of mass distraction were really that big.

LOL..but..I have never met anyone in the AJC art department, so they were not drawing it from my own likeness…it’s merely a coincidence wink

By Rell

March 16, 2006 04:21 PM | Link to this

@ATL, Merkessons and Nikki’s across the street are off the chain..but you have to pay for the extra…at delowe…you get your full carry out plate for one price believe that…but i love all the hood fish spots…..have killed them over and over….good eatin

By MissUnderstood

March 16, 2006 04:23 PM | Link to this

See…. there you go……. I hit turbo in my car when I get near Bowen Homes..lol One of my lil cousins lived there and she invited the rug rats to a bday party. I couldn’t enjoy the party for standing at the door with my mace thinking someone was about to run up in there. lol

By i'm swiss

March 16, 2006 04:24 PM | Link to this

@DuShawn — Yeah, seemed like the perfect set-up to me. But the wife says she feels guilty — like she’s not being “fair” to all parties. Never bothered me. Oh well, fun while it lasted…

By MissUnderstood

March 16, 2006 04:26 PM | Link to this

Married Lesbians…..To each his own…..Since I don’t want another woman near the cobbler, and since I’m not going near the cobbler, then I wouldn’t understand anyway….

By 2 can play that game©

March 16, 2006 04:28 PM | Link to this

to whomever asked if Diva’s weapons were really that big……………..YES!

very SUCCULENT to say the least.

By MissUnderstood

March 16, 2006 04:29 PM | Link to this

DIVA I believe they read the blog more than we know and they just imagined how they could be. lmao

By MissUnderstood

March 16, 2006 04:31 PM | Link to this

lmao @ 2… I knew you would chime in on that one. lol

By FitChick

March 16, 2006 04:33 PM | Link to this

LMAO @ MissU I hit turbo in my car when I get near Bowen Homes

By MissUnderstood

March 16, 2006 04:33 PM | Link to this

Why does my man have me watching game play, and more importantly, why am I interested?

By DuShawn

March 16, 2006 04:33 PM | Link to this

Its a beautiful situation, but you must obey the rules.

By MissUnderstood

March 16, 2006 04:36 PM | Link to this

@FitChick I have to, I ain’t that brave….

By MissUnderstood

March 16, 2006 04:38 PM | Link to this

I am so glad my baby doesn’t ask me to do anything he knows I am not comfortable with….

By MOMMIE

March 16, 2006 04:41 PM | Link to this

Just checkin in and what!!! Lesbians, succulent weapons of mass destruction? Wow I missed too much.

Nite Nite!

By DasKrait2

March 16, 2006 04:42 PM | Link to this

I thought those were her blouse’s shoulder pads, those are the twins? had to look at that pic again, missed them the first time. LMAO. seriously. LOL

By aka Brother To The Night

March 16, 2006 04:42 PM | Link to this

Yea Baby @ Wise Diva

By FitChick

March 16, 2006 04:45 PM | Link to this

Enjoy the madness! I’m out. Peace

By ATLborn

March 16, 2006 04:51 PM | Link to this

MissU yeah Merkerson’s is still open. They’re open 7 days a week. They close at 8 during the week, ‘cept Friday. They stay open later on Sat. too.

By ATLborn

March 16, 2006 04:52 PM | Link to this

I missed them too Das! They don’t do justice for the twins. The are much more mouth wateringly beautiful in person.

By DasKrait2

March 16, 2006 04:57 PM | Link to this

@ATLborn - which is actually pretty screwed since had she not wanted to turn it into a family event, I would have been over there to the aquarium about 2 months ago. But she did get married at the spur of the moment, so…LOL This happened about three weeks ago, in fact the weekend before I went to NC. I stopped by her place on the way back.

this is the sister who twice tried to marry, but IVAN and KATRINA screwed up.

By MissUnderstood

March 16, 2006 04:58 PM | Link to this

rotflmao…. yall crazy….. lol

By MissUnderstood

March 16, 2006 04:59 PM | Link to this

I may have to swing by Merkerson’s….. I’m gettin hooked on Yasin’s though. It’s going to be a toss up.

By ATLborn

March 16, 2006 05:04 PM | Link to this

Das - U definitely have to check it out.

MissU- U can’t go wrong with Merkerson’s.

By 2 can play that game©

March 16, 2006 05:06 PM | Link to this

Rell, that joint is bangin ain’t it….me and the Be Be’s were blastin it this weekend, folks were lookin at us like we were crazy…Jr. bouncin wit it, and lil mama doin her thang!!!!

By Melody

March 16, 2006 06:09 PM | Link to this

Im back! Thanks Dushawn for the compliment. I don’t like to say what % of men cheat because that would leave room for others to judge me. But if 80% is right then wouldn’t it be interesting to know if the person who said 10 out 12 married friends were faithful, if theyre sure only two of them got caught cheating, nullifying that estimate? Im just saying. @ Techbabe- Please don’t misunderstand my words blissfully ignorant to mean that I “expect” my man to cheat. I totally agree with you about not wanting that,a relationship without trust is doomed from jump. However, realistically, Can I keep my man’s piece in my purse? Can I ensure that he won’t face any temptations & control his actions? No, I have to trust him to nurture the trust I place in him. Ideally, my man would never cheat and we’d live happily ever after. But were talking about human beings covered in flesh. People, by nature tend to do what feels good, right or wrong. If you don’t know about something it wont hurt you (blissfully ignorant),when you find out it hurts. So let’s say you “know” he’s cheating. Youre hurt, confused & have to deal with the chaos. He betrayed your trust. But he regrets doing it & wants a 2nd chance to save your love and regain your trust, could you forgive him and move past the hurt? Before you answer no, remember a mouth can and will say anything. My ex used to always say “Keep living life has alot to show you.” He was older (8yrs) than me, I’d be like “Whatever!”, but he knew. I learned that a fact is a fact and the truth is the truth. But, a fact isn’t necessarily the truth. Life would be so simple if we had the luxury of everything being black and white. Im not attacking you, I just don’t want to be misunderstood.

 

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