View from the cop: Crime & punishment

View from the Cop is moving to a new site on Wordpress. Blogger Steve Rose of the Sandy Springs Police Department gives his take on crime, offers safety tips and give his weekly picks from the police blotter. Follow Steve Rose to the new blog site.

AJC.com > Metro > View from the cop > Archives > 2008 > December > 23

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Why we act like morons at 4-way stops

Folks, we can put a man on the moon—or at least a convincible sound stage looking like the lunar surface, but take any four American motorists and put them at a four-way stop and suddenly they regress to moronic levels of intelligence.

First to arrive and first to go. It doesn’t sound hard—or so it seems.

Something, some weird Bermuda-Triangle like thing, somehow affects the ability of drivers to make a decision as to who got there first and then what to do about it. Interestingly, four-way stops allow us to see what type of personalities we have.

For instance, Type A drivers arrive at the stop sign and immediately take it that they arrived first and after a brief California Stop* continue through the sign at about 2-5 MPH. If they feel that they have arrived just a mini-second too late, they pull about one-third the way into the intersection and immediately place their hand up next to the windshield and begin waving back and forth, rapidly, not allowing, but ordering the other driver to immediately continue. It’s not a courteous gesture but more of a demand. Type-A drivers get a lot of tickets.

Type B drivers ease up to the stop sign but allow everyone and anyone to go before they do. This is also very aggravating because it causes the whole numerical rotation to go off-kilter. Once someone screws up the natural order at the four-way stop sign and what you believe to be the proper rotation, it’s every person to him or herself. The result is catastrophic. Once one person goes off, the rest fall into a sort of Type A and Type B funk.

The Type A’s begin waving feverishly first with their right hand up against the windshield and then out the window, first with all fingers waving and then just one. At the same time they’re throwing the other hand in the air as if to say: “What the (#$&%^) are you thinking??!!”

Type B’s, obviously more passive, don’t know what the hell to do and, with a death grip on the steering wheel, slowly try to ease through the intersection—at exactly the same time Type-A’s are trying to bully their way through. Ultimately both cars will pull out at the same time, pause, make hand gestures, shrug shoulders, then start forward again at the same time, and then repeat the last paragraph.

There is a third category which is the driver on his or her cell phone and who approaches and then just sits there like a (^$(#&)ing putz, enthusiastically babbling incoherently into the (%#*&$^)ing cell phone!!

Quite simply, these people should be beaten.

At some point, we need to realize that regardless of how smart we are individually, or how stupid for that matter, four-way stops are the great equalizers. We are conditioned to respond to them that way. We can’t, or at least we’re not supposed to run them but make no mistake, once we approach them, it’s a race.

What to Do?

Why not put a set of random lights, blue, red, yellow, and green, at each stop sign. As you approach, the automatic sensor picks up which car broke the super scientific laser beam thing and triggers green. The others cannot be the same color. If by chance two cars hit the beam at the same time, the winner is determined by answering a multiple-choice question from the driver’s manual, displayed on an electronic sign, or if the two driver’s agree, rock, paper and scissors.

Whether you’re Type-A or Type-B, don’t dread your approach to the four-way stop. Have fun with it. Celebrate it. Instead of waving the other driver on, do the Robot or perhaps a short rendition of your favorite interpretive dance.

*California Stop

Popular but illegal. From the folks who first introduced Right-on-Red at traffic lights took it a step further by trying to introduce slowing but not stopping based on the fact the driver didn’t see any real threat by oncoming traffic. Although reviewed, all fifty states rejected the California Stop, not because they were afraid of being labeled as “liberal,” but more because there were too many wrecks. Go figure.

Anyway, four way stops are among the most complained on. The traffic unit usually receives complaints on speeding first and then stop signs second. Neighborhood stop signs are the most complained on. Most people think that since it’s relatively remote and there is not much traffic, it’s okay to run the sign. It’ isn’t. A stop is more or less an absence of movement. Ultimately rolling through the stop sign, even at ½ miles per hour, is still moving and not a stop. So, why not just stop? You can be back on your way in 2.5 seconds! What are you missing?

Permalink | Comments (119) | Post your comment |

 
AJC Breaking News Updates

Kudzu Services » Find the right people for the job