View from the cop: Crime & punishment
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AJC.com > Metro > View from the cop > Archives > 2007 > December > 04
Tuesday, December 4, 2007
Preparing to be tasered
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
Today is the day I get the taser. We’re doing taser training. Part of it includes the five-seconds of personal relationship with the business end of it. Naturally I was concerned so I asked the training officer if, being 55 years old and all, I would have any embarrassing side effects like my head exploding? Should I or should I not stop off at CVS for some Depends?
“Oh no.” He replied. “You don’t do this.” As he holds his hands wide open. “You do this.” As he clinches his fist very tight. “You don’t expand” he says as he does weird things with both hands, “you do this” as he curls up in a ball.
“Okay-okay, I get it.”
Part of taser training includes the video taping of your experience. This accomplishes two things: 1. satisfies your natural curiosity of what you would look like as you try to form a pretzel, and 2. You get to see the people behind you laughing as you do your impression of Joe Cocker on steroids.
How bad could it be?
Mondays are weird days
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
Happy Tuesday
I think the planets have aligned for the day. Dunkin Donuts had a good stock of banana walnut muffins and I actually got one.
How does it work out for you on a Monday? I don’t like the phone calls that come in over the weekend. Too many people call me without really thinking through it first.
“Hello, I need a police officer to sit all day at my intersection because Gladys runs the stop sign every Tuesday between 8 a.m. and 10 p.m. I tried saying something to her but she flipped me off.”
“Hi, We’d like to hire an off-duty officer to keep the drunk kids from leaving my son’s party. We’re taking their keys and letting them drink but we would like the officer there to stop them from leaving because we feel like that’s the responsible thing to do. We’re trying to set an example.”
“Hi, we would like to hire an off-duty officer for an after-party for our employees, starting at 1 a.m. and going until about 5 a.m. We’d like someone who isn’t offended by nudity. Thank you.”
