View from the cop: Crime & punishment
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AJC.com > Metro > View from the cop > Archives > 2007 > September > 04 > Entry
I’m surrounded by goobers
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
There’s something in the kudzu, folks.
Normally semi-intelligent people are taking a left turn into Dumbo-land. You can’t even find a haven at home without some nitwit shooting their mouth off without doing their homework—hence one of the neighborhood Bozoettes walking her dog, the same one that gets out and runs up to you on the street which, by the way doesn’t bother me at all.
The same nitwit, walking her dog, comes face to face with Roxy the Rottweiler. Of course, Rottweilers are Satan’s best friend and known to be affiliated with Al Qaeda and several other organizations, all bad ones. Roxy happens to be an 85- pound Rottweiler who’s just here for the beer. We took her from a rescue group and she has become a pretty mellow dog. She’s inside the fence but every once in while we brush her outside and she likes to run in circles and then back towards the front door because she thinks she’s entitled to our bed.
Well, she was on the first lap when Ms. Bozoette came up the hill and saw her. Now she justifies her actions here, based on her husband’s extensive background of medical service and his horrific Rottweiler tales of how Rottweilers have torn apart the limbs of the humans in their attempt to dominate the world. After all, we all know that Rottweilers have been involved in everything from the failed Bay of Pigs invasion to the entrapment of Larry Craig, who was caught in a little “Tearoom Trade” a while back.
Although Triumph the Insult Dog is said to be a Yugoslavian Mountain Hound, he looks very similar to a Rottweiler and probably consults them. Thus the Axis of Evil connection.
As the neighborhood Bozoette passed by our house and offered her less-than-two-cent opinion, Detective Sandy and I politely offered our opposing view and something about the horse she rode in on. The fact is, we saw the dog and took offense to her embellished-to-the-point-of-fiction fairly tale. She waddled off visibly upset that she got more than she bargained for in return. Apparently she’s used to dishing out cheap shots without a return.
Guilt by association is a theory of an ignorant person, even when it involves dogs. In my 31-plus years in law enforcement, I can’t recall working a bite case involving a Rottweiler. Sure it’s happened, but to be honest with you. I’m more leery of fools with big mouths than I am of dogs.
She should feel lucky we didn’t have the Shih Tzu out there. She’ll bite you and then steal $40 from your wallet.
Comments
Commenting is now closed for this entry.
By Lori
September 4, 2007 11:32 AM | Link to this
I can relate. Nothing infuriates me more than ignorant people who open their mouths too often.
By Lex Luthor
September 4, 2007 12:14 PM | Link to this
Its sad that people don’t realize that drinking because you’re misreable all of the time makes you miserable because you drink all of the time.
And, you know its time to do something about it when you start yelling at dogs because 1) they don’t understand most of what you’re saying and 2) unless you’re the one that feeds them they don’t care what you have to say either.
By dogfree
September 4, 2007 1:05 PM | Link to this
Rottweilers are EEEEEVILLLLL.
By paul
September 4, 2007 1:08 PM | Link to this
arf!!!!!!!!!!!
By dertah
September 4, 2007 1:20 PM | Link to this
this blog was written by the goober king! what a waste of time.
By Pamela
September 4, 2007 3:45 PM | Link to this
Some breeds have gotten a bad reputations - Rotties are one of those breeds. Most are all bark and little bite - unless they are protecting thier families.
It is easier to lump breeds of dogs, as we lump certain groups of people.
By m
September 4, 2007 4:43 PM | Link to this
This is just too funny.
By Greghard
September 5, 2007 5:06 AM | Link to this
“Southern hospitality”. What a load of s**!
By Rosie Rojas
September 5, 2007 10:18 AM | Link to this
I guess it’s not enough that the Sandy Springs Code Enforcement has to tell you what to do with your specimen tree’s now you have a citizen dog patrol giving you their unwanted opinions. What next, do we have to get the architectural committee review board to approve our new sofa?
By elladee
September 5, 2007 6:46 PM | Link to this
What has happened in the last decade or so that people feel so inclined to give you their unasked for opinions on everything from sugar in yogurt to how much water I should drink (excuse me, do I even know you?) to dogs to which bush I should pull up in my front yard and replace with a japanese maple. Seriously people, unless you are a good friend and the comment is necessary, keep it to yourself!
By General Lee
September 5, 2007 11:44 PM | Link to this
Most municipalities in the Atlanta area have laws concerning dogs. Either you abide by the law or you don’t.
Many people who own dogs won’t accept the responsibility associated with owning one. Most people are relatively tolerant, but when you own a dog who “occasionally” (3 times a week) escapes (a euphemism for “owner lets out”)and the owner does nothing to stop it, then you’re not being a good neighbor. For that, you deserve to pay the consequences. When you let a dog go unattended, you risk harming the dog and your neighbors. I know a woman who, when driving, tried to dodge a loose dog. She hit a tree and is permanently disabled. If you let your dog loose, you are not a dog lover.
I lived in Marietta next to a woman who wouldn’t accept responsibility for her dog who ran rampant. I asked her to keep her dog in her yard but she wouldn’t. I called Animal Control but she wouldn’t listen to them. Then I installed a video surveillance system, taped her dog’s repeated escapes, and reported her.
Bottom line: we moved. Between her dog, her live-in boyfriend and his skinhead son who drove the Towncar with the 24s, we figured the neighbor hood was declining and moved. Good luck Heidi!!
By John
September 6, 2007 10:45 AM | Link to this
Was the person who wrote this incoherent blathery drunk, or does he/she usually write like this?
By Dustoff917
September 6, 2007 4:25 PM | Link to this
People think my German Shepherd is scarey and the Cocker cute, but the Shepherd is a laid back lovable dog and the Cocker will chew your leg off.
Ask the asshat salesman that pulled the stormdoor out of my wife’s had and attempted to step in about my Cocker, old Nunna ate his leg up, took over 200 stitches, and the Shepherd just watched. Animal Control could not believe it!!
By Shepherd owner
September 7, 2007 12:44 AM | Link to this
Thank you Dustoff917!!! My Shepherd is very large and is more brains than brawn. The bozos out there don’t know that little dogs protect themselves by biting and barking and big dogs don’t feel the need to.
By bill
September 7, 2007 6:41 PM | Link to this
I swear Lt. Steve, I do believe some of your bloggers drank to the point of misery, then got miserable to the point of drunkeness, then typed their e-mail.
By formeratlgirl
September 8, 2007 12:05 AM | Link to this
OMG! This was hysterical. As the owner of a “killer” chihuahua, I find this column hysterical. It’s amazing how people offer random opinions on just about anything. While I fear large dogs, a condition stemming from having an over-zealous puppy playing too hard with me as a toddler (so my parents say), I’m not going to tell anyone that he or she can’t raise a dog of their choosing.
Sadly, there are so many dogs in rescues and the pound that desperately need homes that no one should throw rocks at anyone who has opened their home to a dog (or even a cat), no matter what the breed.