View from the cop: Crime & punishment
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AJC.com > Metro > View from the cop > Archives > 2007 > July > 20 > Entry
Kindergarten — no, make it preschool — cop
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
Hi, kids. We brought the police car and thought you’d like to climb in it and look at the radio and — (many hands in the air waving).
Before I can select one of the 20 hands in the air, the questions begin.
— Have you ever shot anyone?
— My name is Ricky. My mom says the police only put bad people in jail. My sister is bad. I can have her here in 10 minutes. Can you take her?
— My dad says that you’ll lock me up if I don’t eat my vegetables. Why would you do that? Have you ever eaten them? Yuk.
— They said you were going to bring a helicopter.
— You don’t look as cool as the guy on CSI.
— My uncle said you guys would bring donuts and not to tell you his name. His name is Bobby.
— Have you ever shot anyone?
— Hey officer, it’s me, Ricky again. What did you decide about my sister?
— My mom has some handcuffs in her sock drawer.
— My uncle says you don’t have to take the drunk-test.
— Do you have a dog?
— My mom says if we have a problem we can ask the police. My problem is my sister.
— Have you been on “C.O.P.S.”?
— I was told there would be a helicopter.
— So, if people don’t take the drunk-test, how do they become drunks?
— Have you ever shot anyone?
— Don’t tell my Uncle Bobby I told you his name. His last name is Richards — just don’t tell anyone.
— My sister is over there on the playground. She can’t run fast. You can probably catch her.
— I know what the emergency number is. It’s 911. I call it every day and tell them I like the police. They tell me they like me too and then they ask me to hang up.
— Go ahead and lock me up but I hate carrots.
Finally, the two-minute attention span has passed and the kids get to climb in the back seat of the car and look past the cage to the computers, and then slide out so the next group can slide in. A group picture is taken with the officer, the teacher and 15 kids, seven of them with their fingers in their noses, one crying, and one who just looks happy to be here. Ricky was nice enough to shut the doors for us.
We climbed in the car and when I adjusted the mirror, I saw the top of this little bitty head. I adjusted the mirror to reveal a little girl with a big smile on her face, just looking around.
“Ah, you must be Ricky’s sister.”
Comments
Commenting is now closed for this entry.
By Natalie*
July 20, 2007 4:48 PM | Link to this
That is too precious! Oh to be young and innocent again.
By atl20g
July 20, 2007 4:57 PM | Link to this
Steve, it must have been a very slow week for you guys… But you gotta give yourself credit for a great article. Did you ever shoot anyone????
By Heather
July 20, 2007 4:59 PM | Link to this
lol! that’s great!
By Marcio
July 20, 2007 5:03 PM | Link to this
Congrats Officer! I’m 100% certain you made those kids day. And made mine too, I crack myself, and brought me back my Kindergaten times. And did Rick sister got jail time? LOL
By GG
July 20, 2007 5:27 PM | Link to this
This was great! I laughed out loud. Aren’t kids wonderful. Thank you for the humor, I always enjoy your articles.
By Sherri Frey
July 20, 2007 8:11 PM | Link to this
My son was 4 and scared of fire Trucks. I made an appointment with the local fire house to bring him in. He met the fire dog, got a chance to use the siren and road around the block in a fire truck using all the lights. He had a blast!
When my son was about 9, the cops found him with a stolen bike that he had paid $5 for. He got a ride in the back of the police car, cuffed, to go to the kids house that sold it to him and a ride back un-cuffed in the front seat. He was scared but felt he did the right thing.
This was in Clayton County. he is now 37 and remembers every second.
By rbrock
July 21, 2007 1:40 PM | Link to this
Maybe, I say maybe, if all the junior thugs in training knew that COPS were good people they wouldn’t do the garbage they do. Maybe try going to the inner city, they have the most problems.
By Jody
July 21, 2007 6:05 PM | Link to this
This was too funny! As the oldest of 4 kids, there are rumors that I would have done something like Ricky did to any one of my 3 brothers. I almost fell out of my chair when I read that one. Thanks for a great laugh Steve!
By Analchord
July 21, 2007 7:09 PM | Link to this
I’ve got 20 questions, copper: Why did you pull me over? Driving while black? So Not Funny. Recede, and read. (the constitution)
What’s the rush to judgement all about? You’re not supposed to deduce nothing. That’s for a court of law. Just observe and read the g-dang rule book. We have rights that better-men-than-you have died to preserve. I’m not a criminal, although I play one on U-tube. Maybe THAT’S where you think you remember me from. Just do your dang job, and protect, and serve, and that other thing I forgot.
You cops. I know, YOU dont get paid enough to go into dark alleys after drug-dealing scum who provide a societal want-and-need thing.
Then dont go in there!
We need our f’n drugs, you horrid cops, and we’re gonna git ‘em. No matter how many times you tell us not to. Read the constitution again and again about the pursuit of hashiness.
We are the druggies …. We are the american people. And shame on you for ignoring the real threat of bank robbers, purse snatchers, (and I mean snatch)… dont forget the occasional murderer, and of course, the terrorists, of whom you know nothing, have never caught anyone, or solved a case of which, by the way for, ad infinitum…..
I’m sick to death of the drug war. There are 100 million Americans who take f’n drugs. My own wife takes Percosets. (RX).
She’s not only a fiend, but she’s fat! But do you ever drop by to check on her to see if she’s acting like a fat fiend? Hell, no! Well let me tell you something, copper, SHE IS!!!!
lol! Just kidding, had you going, didn’t I? This blog was all just poetry, and a bit of comedy writing!
The Truth: I condemn all drug abuse and only wrote this to embolden druggies, (and my fat wife), to expose themselves to law enforcement, so that the police can shoot them, (and my fat wife), on sight, and God will applaud your efforts you fine, fine officers of the law whom I totally respect and admire!!!
the single life is gonna be great!!!
I think she’s driving stoned around marietta near pope high school. (it’s about 7:00 pm on a saturday night).
Good Hunting, kind sirs!!
By Jim
July 22, 2007 8:47 AM | Link to this
Great column. You can get an amazing insight into a family by talking to their kid:-)
Oh, and anyone who has ever seen a story about a teenager chained to a bedframe/radiator/fauctet/whatever and said “how can people DO that? has probably never raised a teenager.
By terry
July 22, 2007 9:42 AM | Link to this
Steve , I hope you read this as this has nothing to do with this article.If you have not heard I was wondering if you are going to The rock of Ages concert.It is Def Leppard,STYX(your favorite} and Foreigner.Coming up in august but I forget where at.Just wanted to let you know.
By Chris
July 22, 2007 6:07 PM | Link to this
I am watching the news right now. Why is there a shooting at a black club every weekend? Why do you people carry guns and then shoot people at a bar? Just amazing. Thanks for ruining Buckhead too.
By steve
July 22, 2007 11:02 PM | Link to this
i am surprised that you have time to go to the schools. most cops seem to be playing rader imcome inhancement. making money one speeder at a time.
By Liz
July 23, 2007 2:30 PM | Link to this
That’s adorable! The questions kids ask now arn’t so different from when I was a kid.
By Lt. Steve
July 23, 2007 6:16 PM | Link to this
Hi Terry, Thanks for the heads up on the concert. Steeeeveee…..come on….get over it man. You got a ticket and you’re mad………….come on Steeeeeveee……….so you’re mad………and now it’s a conspiracy……come on…..Steeeeveeee..
By Akagi
July 24, 2007 2:03 PM | Link to this
It’s not a conspiracy, it’s highwaymenism done by various county and city governments such as the city of Atlanta that likes to put its cops in pickup trucks in the shade trees along US 41 near Mt. Paran in order to extort money from Cobb County commuters.
And no, I haven’t been ensnared by this speed trap or any other speed trap for that matter. But if you think local governments never use their police as a way to boost revenue, then you are mad (e.g. Sandy Springs).
By gateacher
July 26, 2007 8:07 PM | Link to this
Thanks for the walk down memory lane. I taught 4 yr olds for 3 years. You’re lucky you actually got questions. A lot of times I would get stories instead. And yes 4 yr olds tell all the family secrets! I’m now teaching middle school (thought it would be different!)and still get off the wall questions. Thanks for the laughs.
By Lex Luthor
July 27, 2007 11:11 AM | Link to this
That’s funny.
Thanks.