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AJC.com > Metro > View from the cop > Archives > 2006 > November > 13 > Entry
Let the (safe) shopping begin!
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
Once again we find ourselves at the brink of another holiday season. First we start with Thanksgiving. Every year, first with my kids, and now my grandchildren, I tell the great story of how the Pilgrims came over on the Queen Mary and discovered hippies, disguised as Indians, living in tents near Plymouth Fury. Once the Indians stopped laughing at the funny hats the Pilgrims wore, they sat, smoked from the great peace-pipe, and got really hungry. Following the traditional Chinese take-out, they watched football.
Next in this holiday cycle comes the great shopping extravaganza. It is probably now when you need to make a dent in the shopping experience. For some reason, most of us wait until the bitter end. We are creatures of procrastination. Why? I’ll explain later.
We will soon line up at the mall, jockey for parking positions, and lip read the insults from passing cars as you go the wrong way down the long parking aisle. We will wave to our fellow men and women with one finger and then, with assembly-line mentality, slowly make our way into the overcrowded stores, praying and hoping for a shopping cart with the wiggle-wheel that doesn’t go left.
This is also the time when the sharks start to swim among us. No smarter than they were last year, thieves will start cruising the mall and shopping center parking lots, doing the same thing they always do, looking for the weakest in the herd. Wake up America—or at least wake up locally. Crime will spike in November and December. There are people out there, spending all day and night looking to steal your stuff. Don’t let them!
If you will read and follow, read and follow (notice I didn’t say read and forget), the following common-sense tips while shopping, you will place yourself in the teeny-tiny percentage of shoppers known as prepared. This, as you know, will be good for America!
Here we go.
First, know the enemy. Crooks don’t dress in black turtleneck sweaters and black stocking caps. Most dress just like most of you do, with jeans, flannel shirts and sometimes fashionable hair. Not all crooks are men. Women make good thieves too. Sometimes they work together simply because that looks normal. The man usually has a scowl on his face just like most men at the mall. Don’t confuse opportunity with brains. Most crooks are simpletons. They do, however, recognize opportunities left behind by lazy victims-to-be. Here is a news flash: Your car is not Fort Knox. Just because you lock the door doesn’t mean someone won’t smash and grab what they see inside.
Stealth is good. If you can’t lock it away, hide it. Although not completely safe, your odds of retaining your valuables in the car are better if they’re locked in the trunk. Not only locked but hidden. If the bad people get in the trunk, having to look around may be a bit too much on their risk timetable. They don’t have a lot of time. Breaking a window, reaching in and grabbing your purse or other valuables are well within it. The moral of this paragraph is: Make the crook take time to look. Hide everything.
Be alert and aware of your surroundingsCall it the “Duh-Factor.” I saw a man, so consumed with his Blackberry, actually walk into a wall. That really hurt.
Display confidenceCrooks choose targets. This really works. I mean, don’t overdo it. You don’t want to look like your walking into the ring for your title match but do have “The Look.” “The Look” is this: Make eye contact a little longer than usual. It’s uncomfortable but equally so for the other person. If they’re a bad person, it really sends out bad vibes to them. If you nod to someone as you pass them, only nod your head up—never down. Down is submissive. Nod up and keep your eyes right on them. Again, uncomfortable but as you will soon realize, weirdly entertaining after a while. As your skills develop, you can act mildly demented in certain cases where you feel it best serves the purpose. It’s your world man—crazy-time is ok.
Trust your instincts Don’t second-guess. It’s that simple. If your biological “Oh-Sh**“ alarm goes off, act on it. Remove yourself from the physical location and take action towards a safe zone. When in doubt, act crazy. People don’t mess with you when they think you’re crazy.
Carry only what you need This is a good one. Okay, I’ll say it. “I’m really impressed with your Rolex Presidential.” There. Now go put the damn thing away while you shop. Believe me, you flaunt that thing to the wrong person, they’ll get it if they want it.
It’s here where I get the “I won’t live my life in fear” comments. I don’t want you to live your life in fear but that doesn’t mean you should live it in dumb also. Just make the change in the shopping season. Maybe you should leave the 40-pound purse at home and slim it down to a wallet that you could carry in your front pockets of your designer jeans. Coat pockets are easier targets for pickpockets. If you’ve ever seen pickpockets who are good at what they do, you would be amazed at how fluid and quickly they can go in and out of pockets, even tight pockets, and come away with your wallet without you knowing it. Some work in teams. One guy or girl bumps you while the other grabs. Take only what credit cards and cash you need on the trip. Keep your goods out of your back pockets. Front pockets only. Up near Ball Ground, we sometimes barter with small pigs and other small farm animals. If that is the case, firmly carry the small pig under your arm or in your burlap bag. Never leave your pig unattended.
Don’t carry too many shopping bags Carrying too many bags makes you appear (and you are) vulnerable. Request the store to hold your merchandise or place them in your trunk. If you are reasonably close to home, make it a two-tripper.
Shop with others It’s fun and you can spend the time talking about those didn’t make the trip with you. You’ll significantly reduce your risk by having others with you, especially after dark.
Utilize securityIf you do have to shop alone, ask for an escort to the car. The shopping centers and malls will begin staffing security personnel for this reason. Don’t be shy about asking.
Be ready Don’t wait until you get to the car to look for your keys. Get them out while you’re still inside the store. If you have pepper spray, and you should, have it ready (and pointed in the right direction please.) Get to the car, put your stuff in, start it up and go. Don’t look at receipts. Just go. If you’re up near Ball Ground, quickly throw the pig in the back of the pickup and go on.
Comments
Commenting is now closed for this entry.
By Lt. Steve
November 13, 2006 9:22 PM | Link to this
Steve: This is great stuff. uh, yep. okay….
By missandie
November 13, 2006 10:43 PM | Link to this
…and if all else fails, shop at Amazon.com. They sell everything!
By KJill
November 13, 2006 11:43 PM | Link to this
Hippies living in tents near Plymouth Fury? So that’s how that car and that culture got their names … Thanks again for the wonderful history lesson Officer Steve!!
By Jamie John
November 14, 2006 7:56 AM | Link to this
Be alert and aware of your surroundings. Call it the “Duh-Factor.” I saw a man, so consumed with his Blackberry, actually walk into a wall. That really hurt.
Crack a rib from laughing too hard?
By Anita (Zundel) Nelson
November 14, 2006 10:02 AM | Link to this
My son, Shane Heath Zundel, age 39 was gunned down in his own back yard in front of his wife on 1-20-65. After several investigators have checked the case, even a cold case squad, we were told yesterday that without “new evidence or leads” it will be placed on a shelf and not worked. Is this justice??? Can you get away with murder in DeKalb County?? What steps can we take to ensure my son is not forgotten? Thank you
By BexB
November 14, 2006 10:54 AM | Link to this
I always put valuables in the trunk right away, but NEVER right after I park somewhere. People notice if you have something special that you’re trying to hide in your trunk. Put that stuff in the trunk and then go to your next destination. That way, the theives at the new parking lot won’t know you have something special in your car. I also do most of my shopping ahead of time. In fact, I only have two gifts left to buy and that’s only because my husband has to decide what he wants to get for his dad. If I do shop during the holidays, it’s just for myself and my home, so there’s not much in my car at any given time.
By Michael
November 15, 2006 10:36 AM | Link to this
I just want to know why an asp baton is illegal. I love those things and they are more manly than silly pepper spray.
By Andy
November 16, 2006 9:11 AM | Link to this
Question: What defensive measures are citizens allowed to perform during a mugging?
By Az
November 25, 2006 5:27 AM | Link to this
Kinda amusing that in the state of Georgia, you can get a permit to carry a concealed (or open) firearm on your person, but don’t you dare carry a metal bar (asp baton) or knife. :)))) Always pay attention to your surroundings. Nothing in your life is so important that you just HAVE to gab on the cell phone while walking in a parking lot. You are just asking for trouble.
-Az