View from the cop: Crime & punishment
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AJC.com > Metro > View from the cop > Archives > 2006 > November > 13
Monday, November 13, 2006
Let the (safe) shopping begin!
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
Once again we find ourselves at the brink of another holiday season. First we start with Thanksgiving. Every year, first with my kids, and now my grandchildren, I tell the great story of how the Pilgrims came over on the Queen Mary and discovered hippies, disguised as Indians, living in tents near Plymouth Fury. Once the Indians stopped laughing at the funny hats the Pilgrims wore, they sat, smoked from the great peace-pipe, and got really hungry. Following the traditional Chinese take-out, they watched football.
Next in this holiday cycle comes the great shopping extravaganza. It is probably now when you need to make a dent in the shopping experience. For some reason, most of us wait until the bitter end. We are creatures of procrastination. Why? I’ll explain later.
We will soon line up at the mall, jockey for parking positions, and lip read the insults from passing cars as you go the wrong way down the long parking aisle. We will wave to our fellow men and women with one finger and then, with assembly-line mentality, slowly make our way into the overcrowded stores, praying and hoping for a shopping cart with the wiggle-wheel that doesn’t go left.
This is also the time when the sharks start to swim among us. No smarter than they were last year, thieves will start cruising the mall and shopping center parking lots, doing the same thing they always do, looking for the weakest in the herd. Wake up America—or at least wake up locally. Crime will spike in November and December. There are people out there, spending all day and night looking to steal your stuff. Don’t let them!
If you will read and follow, read and follow (notice I didn’t say read and forget), the following common-sense tips while shopping, you will place yourself in the teeny-tiny percentage of shoppers known as prepared. This, as you know, will be good for America!
Here we go.
First, know the enemy. Crooks don’t dress in black turtleneck sweaters and black stocking caps. Most dress just like most of you do, with jeans, flannel shirts and sometimes fashionable hair. Not all crooks are men. Women make good thieves too. Sometimes they work together simply because that looks normal. The man usually has a scowl on his face just like most men at the mall. Don’t confuse opportunity with brains. Most crooks are simpletons. They do, however, recognize opportunities left behind by lazy victims-to-be. Here is a news flash: Your car is not Fort Knox. Just because you lock the door doesn’t mean someone won’t smash and grab what they see inside.
Stealth is good. If you can’t lock it away, hide it. Although not completely safe, your odds of retaining your valuables in the car are better if they’re locked in the trunk. Not only locked but hidden. If the bad people get in the trunk, having to look around may be a bit too much on their risk timetable. They don’t have a lot of time. Breaking a window, reaching in and grabbing your purse or other valuables are well within it. The moral of this paragraph is: Make the crook take time to look. Hide everything.
Be alert and aware of your surroundingsCall it the “Duh-Factor.” I saw a man, so consumed with his Blackberry, actually walk into a wall. That really hurt.
Display confidenceCrooks choose targets. This really works. I mean, don’t overdo it. You don’t want to look like your walking into the ring for your title match but do have “The Look.” “The Look” is this: Make eye contact a little longer than usual. It’s uncomfortable but equally so for the other person. If they’re a bad person, it really sends out bad vibes to them. If you nod to someone as you pass them, only nod your head up—never down. Down is submissive. Nod up and keep your eyes right on them. Again, uncomfortable but as you will soon realize, weirdly entertaining after a while. As your skills develop, you can act mildly demented in certain cases where you feel it best serves the purpose. It’s your world man—crazy-time is ok.
Trust your instincts Don’t second-guess. It’s that simple. If your biological “Oh-Sh**“ alarm goes off, act on it. Remove yourself from the physical location and take action towards a safe zone. When in doubt, act crazy. People don’t mess with you when they think you’re crazy.
Carry only what you need This is a good one. Okay, I’ll say it. “I’m really impressed with your Rolex Presidential.” There. Now go put the damn thing away while you shop. Believe me, you flaunt that thing to the wrong person, they’ll get it if they want it.
It’s here where I get the “I won’t live my life in fear” comments. I don’t want you to live your life in fear but that doesn’t mean you should live it in dumb also. Just make the change in the shopping season. Maybe you should leave the 40-pound purse at home and slim it down to a wallet that you could carry in your front pockets of your designer jeans. Coat pockets are easier targets for pickpockets. If you’ve ever seen pickpockets who are good at what they do, you would be amazed at how fluid and quickly they can go in and out of pockets, even tight pockets, and come away with your wallet without you knowing it. Some work in teams. One guy or girl bumps you while the other grabs. Take only what credit cards and cash you need on the trip. Keep your goods out of your back pockets. Front pockets only. Up near Ball Ground, we sometimes barter with small pigs and other small farm animals. If that is the case, firmly carry the small pig under your arm or in your burlap bag. Never leave your pig unattended.
Don’t carry too many shopping bags Carrying too many bags makes you appear (and you are) vulnerable. Request the store to hold your merchandise or place them in your trunk. If you are reasonably close to home, make it a two-tripper.
Shop with others It’s fun and you can spend the time talking about those didn’t make the trip with you. You’ll significantly reduce your risk by having others with you, especially after dark.
Utilize securityIf you do have to shop alone, ask for an escort to the car. The shopping centers and malls will begin staffing security personnel for this reason. Don’t be shy about asking.
Be ready Don’t wait until you get to the car to look for your keys. Get them out while you’re still inside the store. If you have pepper spray, and you should, have it ready (and pointed in the right direction please.) Get to the car, put your stuff in, start it up and go. Don’t look at receipts. Just go. If you’re up near Ball Ground, quickly throw the pig in the back of the pickup and go on.
