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AJC.com > Metro > View from the cop > Archives > 2005 > October > 19
Wednesday, October 19, 2005
RoboCop proved dangers of computers
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
There has been a lot of discussion regarding the privatization of government services as a means of being more cost effective. Ultimately, this means fewer workers and less overhead. Robots have been manufactured to do the job that once took five people or more to do. All day long, robots put together cars and do other jobs such as material handling, paint spraying, arc welding, cleaning, grinding, polishing, etc.
We’ve given them more and more responsibilities. The upshot? We humanoids have reduced our own responsibilities and, ultimately, our own worth.
How far will this go?
One place you don’t want a robot is in a police car. Why?
Two words: RoboCop.
We all know that real life is merely a mirror image of films, TV and baseball cliches.
If you study robots enough you’ll see there’s a good chance they will eventually take on a life of their own, try to kill you and take over the world.
It’s as inevitable as the house band playing “Desperado” at last call.
Several models of robots are designed to find bombs. What they don’t tell us is that almost 5% of them have, at one time or another, chased the bomb-robot handler down the street with the bomb in its hand. A “glitch,” they said.
I don’t think so.
Robots are made by the people who eventually will get mad at everyone and then infect computers with a virus that will tell the robots to kill us and take over the world.
Those of you who have experienced viruses know that once your computer is infected, it will most likely turn on you. It would take over the world, but since it has no arms or built-in Gatling guns, it instead gives your credit card information to the rest of Planet Earth.
I’m pretty sure the computers have been talking to the robots. Here’s why:
A recent poll found that electronic stores have had a 27% increase in the number of toy robot returns due to “the unusually high number of family cats exploding in the vicinity of the robot.”
Some 17% of auto-maker employees reported that they were “accidentally” riveted in the butt by a robot designated to rivet trunk lids. The automakers insist that the robot misinterpreted the term “trunk” and the problem has been resolved.
Sure.
Peter Weller (RoboCop) tried to show us that robots are bad business when it comes to things like police work. He went to great effort to show us that not only do we have a legitimate reason to fear robots but apparently there’s no reason to live in Detroit.
Maybe we would understand robots a bit better if they could be personalized to fit the region or job that they’re built for — a kinder, gentler robot. Maybe have robot-sensitivity classes where we would exchange information about ourselves. Great idea, right?
Wrong!
They’re taking in all that data and converting it to some sort of digital stuff that we don’t understand and the first thing you know your office computer goes straight to the porn sites, your gas card gets rejected and your cell phone starts calling your ex-wife with an automated message that starts out saying, “I just don’t think I’m paying enough alimony.”
Just when you get home and turn on the TV to watch “Desperate Housewives”, someone knocks on the door and, sure enough, it’s a police robot with Gatling guns, wanting to shoot you and take over the world.
Who needs that?
