Home > Jay Bookman > Archives > 2008 > June > 28 > Entry
DEL.ICIO.USSituation dire for North Pole residents
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
REYKJAVIK, Iceland (AP) — Urged on by millions of anxious children around the world, military cargo ships were steaming toward the North Pole Friday in an attempt to evacuate Santa Claus, his estimated 300 elves and several dozen reindeer before they sink into the ocean.
The operation was launched after scientists announced that Arctic sea ice was melting so quickly this year that for the first time in recorded history, the North Pole could be ice free by September, destroying Santa’s longtime home and busy workshops
The weather and ocean conditions in the next couple of weeks will determine how much of the remaining sea ice will melt, and early signs are not good, said Mark Serreze. He’s a senior researcher at the National Snow and Ice Data Center and the University of Colorado in Boulder, Colo.
The chances for a total meltdown at the pole are higher than ever because the layer of ice coating the sea is thinner than ever due to global warming, he said.
“A large area at the North Pole and surrounding the North Pole is first-year ice,” Serreze said. “That’s the stuff that tends to melt out in the summer because it’s thin.”
However, the Santa rescue operation has being criticized by skeptics, who claimed there was no consensus that the ice was actually melting.
“Global warming doesn’t exist, and someone should tell Santa that,” said Sen. James Inhofe (R-OK). “The water lapping up next to this guy’s workshop is just an hoax invented by scientists and environmentalists.”
Reached at his North Pole home, Santa was less than convinced.
“Tell that guy I’m about to drown because of this ‘hoax,’” Santa said. “I hate these people who think they can make something true if they just believe it hard enough. What kind of fantasyland do these fools live in?”
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Comments
By Danjonglee
June 28, 2008 10:05 AM | Link to this
Comrades This is great prediction by our scientist. Global Warming stands out as most convenient replacement of control, providing both the means to manipulate the masses and a moral justification for doing so. The masses must believe that it is beneficial to have faith in Global Warming whether proven or not . If Global Warming didn’t exist it would be necessary to invent it. Progress for the future.
By Jay's brother
June 28, 2008 10:13 AM | Link to this
My dearest wayward brother, stick to liberal opining, comedy writing is not in your blood. Why was Greenland named as such—b/c it was GREEN when the Vikings first saw it! They could till it, farm it, and raise livestock. Was it global warming or global cooling that caused it to ice over. Prob not much GREENhouse gases back then. These are made up words for the liberal mindset. Now that the last 2 yrs there has been modest “cooling” overall, the left has changed it to “climate change”—which is an oxymoron b/c by definition—climate is in a constant state of change. LIberals like to believe that man is the master of the universe and we can make earth what we want it to be. Despite all the conflicting evidence of the so called “global warming” caused by man—they refuse to consider change in the sun’s solar activity which makes much more plausible sense. They deny it b/c they can’t control it and so they wouldn’t be able to push their communist agenda. Some “science”! Please…….
By Dusty
June 28, 2008 10:18 AM | Link to this
Well, Santa better put on his tank top and flippers and get ready for the big thaw. But not to worry.
There will be vacation condos built right away at the “newest and latest vacation spot”. Sierra Club will demand all ground floors be ice cooled for the polar bears. Eskimos will change their name to Hotchas and swap their furs for bikinis. Igloos will now be hot-tubs. Reindeer will play water polo. Preservation Trusts will adopt Santa’s workshop. Iceland changes its name to H2Oravik. There’s excitement in the air!! Nice warm air!!
Unfortunately, due to climate changes, the equator is now frozen over. Will someone please tell Santa?
By Taxpayer
June 28, 2008 10:44 AM | Link to this
Now that’s the way a story ought to be told. An issue that affects all of us presented in a more down-to-earth, human interest format. Something our children can relate to even if we can’t. It’s certainly worth a try given that nothing else seems to penetrate some of those aluminum foil caps. We’ll just have to wait until it’s closer to Christmas to see if there’s any real impact though. As for me, I can already hear some of those heart-breaking pleas, “But Mommy, you just can’t let Santa Claus’s home flood like ours did, Can You!”
By Abomi Nation
June 28, 2008 11:23 AM | Link to this
You are mocking a very real problem Jay, and I’m not talking about global warming.
No surprise. Every year we have to battle the God-less liberals who are trying to turn this great Christian nation into Hell itself. Every year this comes up, the War on Christmas In July is very real, here is yet another example brought to you by the communist ajc and socialist dictator wannabe Jay Bookman.
Santa Claus will certainly not drown. You know why Jay? Because James Dobson and his Focus On The Family team are hard at work making sure that a Christmas in July miracle is a reality.
As we speak, there is a great military/Christian convoy gathering all across North America, thanks to the efforts of the wonderful James Dobson! The great Zamboni convoy is going to battle against the War On Christmas In July.
When the Zamboni convoy gets to the North Pole they will wipe away the great warm water and replace it with miles upon miles of gleaming new ice! Santa Claus will not drown! Christmas in July will be saved.
Thanks to James Dobson and thousands of Zamboni’s, our children can once again look forward to a summer of beatings, showers, and Christmas in July!
By Leslie's Lament
June 28, 2008 11:31 AM | Link to this
I thought Jay’s bit about santa clause was abominable.
By George Washington
June 28, 2008 11:32 AM | Link to this
Raise the minimum driving age to 25 years in order to save gasoline….
By Jay's brother
June 28, 2008 12:39 PM | Link to this
Hey Abomi, how did religion get involved in this. Why do leftists think all of the world centers around mans relative insignificant time that he has lived in the long history of the earth. Why was “Greenland” green way back when so they could actually farm it then and is now ice covered. It would make logical sense that if it was Green then, that there probably was no ice at the N. Pole then either. When the ICE AGE ended, was that due to manmade global warming? How about the Little Ice Age earlier this century? I still remember the TIME Mag front cover insinuating an icy end of times for mankind. Try not to shove your and the media’s socialist agenda down our throat under the guise of “science”—it’s just plain insulting.
By Iceman
June 28, 2008 12:58 PM | Link to this
Jay’s Brother,
Get a grip!
Eric the Red (some relation to Santa? Maybe one of the communists you refer to?) was the first Viking to discover Greenland, in the year 982.
The ice sheet is 2 miles plus thick and covers 80% of the continent. It is at least 100,000 yrs old, so Greenland has not been all that green since prehistoric times, and it “iced over” about a thousand millennia before the vikings arrived.
By GodHatesTrash
June 28, 2008 1:13 PM | Link to this
Jay, just when I think you are Hootin’ Wooten’s little “liberal” yap yap lap-dog, you come up with something really funny.
It’s funny, well written, and at an eighth-grade level, which is smart, taking into account the majority of the AJC blog audience…
By Abomi Nation
June 28, 2008 1:20 PM | Link to this
Excellent comments Jay’s Bro! You stupid leftists need to realize something, the earth has gone through many changes in its 10,000 year history! I get sick of the leftist media myself. You people need to open your Bibles.
Oh, and to answer your question Jay’s Bro, leftist Jay is the one who injected religion into this conversation. Remember? Santa Claus? Christmas? Jesus? Presents?
Jay should be ashamed of himself. Thousands of children reading his blog are crying right now thinking they won’t get lots and lots of presents come Christmas. Of course the leftists don’t believe in the concept of Santa Claus, God forbid a rich kid might get better presents than an inner city kid.
Jay, try not to shove your and the media’s God-less agenda down our throat under the guise of “science”—it’s just plain insulting, everyone knows the earth is only 10,000 years old. I bet Santa delivered presents to little boys and girls AND to their dinosaur neighbors back then.
Yes, Virginia and Jay’s Bro, there is a Santa Claus. If it ever came down to it I’m sure the elves would build Santa an Arc. THERE WILL BE PRESENTS THIS CHRISTMAS! Come Hell or high water!
By Jay's brother
June 28, 2008 1:23 PM | Link to this
So Iceman, what caused the melting in 982 when Eric the Red discovered it? “Global Warming? And instead of talking about thousands of years, why don’t you talk in real geological times, say millions of yrs. No credible scientist I’ve read can prove or disprove that Greenland wasn’t green MILLIONS of yrs ago. That’s the problem, no emperic data exist and they make up things as they go along—to suit the political times of the day. Like you say, Get Real!!!
By Jay's brother
June 28, 2008 1:23 PM | Link to this
So Iceman, what caused the melting in 982 when Eric the Red discovered it? “Global Warming? And instead of talking about thousands of years, why don’t you talk in real geological times, say millions of yrs. No credible scientist I’ve read can prove or disprove that Greenland wasn’t green MILLIONS of yrs ago. That’s the problem, no emperic data exist so they make up things as they go along—to suit the political times of the day. Like you say, Get Real!!!
By Dusty
June 28, 2008 1:33 PM | Link to this
Uh oh, watch out for 1:13…
God Hates Trash just got his GED and now he’s all high and mighty. I guess business is not so good with the ice cream cart. Ruins the disposition. So let’s all give him a good “Hang in there, buddy!”
There. Now you can try being sweet.
By @@
June 28, 2008 1:57 PM | Link to this
Dusty, you do not speak for anyone or represent any party or affiliation, you are simply a troll who can only hack Rush Limbaugh’s hatespeak.
You’re like a gumball machine. Rush drops in a penny and your mouth goes open just like a public facility pay toilet, exceptin’ U B not as clean.
You’re the worst possible evolution of the human spirit that could occur in a person. Somewhere, somehow, somebody must have kicked you around some……
And all you can do is try to make others feel as bad as you.
And I think it’s a damn shame. Go back to GLW and say hello to that other magpie, annetteinthenet.
You stalking pos.
By Abomi Nation
June 28, 2008 2:17 PM | Link to this
If the water does threaten the North Pole we must be prepared. Since its the off season the elves should start working on Santa’s Arc immediately.
I picture Rudolf the Red Nosed Reindeer stationed at the very front of the arc, the ice may have melted, but it will still get foggy. Can someone please come up with new lyrics for the Rudolf the Red Nosed Reindeer song?
We don’t have time to build a real big arc so space will be limited. We can only save two of each type of toy. We’ll have two make a list check off each twice.
We should take only the toys that represent good old fashioned Christian values.
For the boys we’ll need to save 2 toy bazookas, 2 toy AK-47’s, 2 toy cap guns, and of course 2 BB guns. I say we leave the GI Joes out.
For the girls we bring 2 easy bake ovens, 2 play houses, and 2 Hairbrushes.
Toys not making the cut for either gender- Purple Teletubbies, Underoos, Brokeback Action Figures, and Judy Garland’s Greatest Hits CD. Of course we will no longer need ice skates.
(Note: If your boy asks for anything on the girls list, get him in the shower quick!)
Merry Christmas Everyone!
By Dusty
June 28, 2008 3:41 PM | Link to this
@@…1:57
Silly ID thief!! YOU ARE NOT @@ AND NEVER WILL BE. R U too ashamed to use your own ID???
Hang in there, buddy…
By Mike Thompson
June 28, 2008 3:59 PM | Link to this
Can anyone tell me what trailer park the people that post comments to this article live-in? They have to be leftovers from the Jerry Springer show. I want to make sure I stay at least a hundred miles away when I have to come to Atlanta.
By President George W. Bush
June 28, 2008 4:45 PM | Link to this
What about the candy cane barber pole that sticks up through the ice at the North Pole?
I know it’s there. I saw it in a Bugs Bunny cartoon.
Will it just float off, or what?
By Hillbilly Deluxe
June 28, 2008 10:00 PM | Link to this
Since the ice is expanding in the Antarctic why doesn’t Santa just outsource to there?
By JohninMableotn
June 29, 2008 7:47 AM | Link to this
Why do idiots always lie when they have their nose rubbed in it? Greenland was called greenland because it was the only way to get people to go there. It was always mostly ice.
Kinda like the way the Iraq war was sold to us as protection from WMDs? Sound familiar idiot. You remember that far?
By Craig
June 29, 2008 9:28 AM | Link to this
“Why was “Greenland” green way back when”
And we wonder why Georgians will probably vote to reelect Saxby, when this type of comment is reflective of the average intelligence level of GA voters…
Amazing…
By Jay's brother
June 29, 2008 9:35 AM | Link to this
Hey John in Mableton, You must live in a your typical liberal fantasyland or you just make things up and claim others are “liars”. The Norseman who initially found Greenland were able to grow livestock and farm in the GREEN fields. As the ice reclaimed Greenland, the livestock died and they turned to fishing to subsist. Eventually it got so cold that most died and the few remaining left. Learn your history you idiot or at least if you lie, make it convincing—and by the way, why do you pinkos bring in the Iraq war into this. I guess it’s just a classic diversionary tactic when you know you are wrong.
By Jay's brother
June 29, 2008 11:34 AM | Link to this
Oh, and for all you other “Greenland” deniers, if you don’t believe me, just look up Wikipedia and the history of Greenland. Don’t listen to morons like John in Mableton or Craig above. Don’t even believe me, just do some independant research yourself rather than being brainwashed by the “Inconvenient Truth” crowd—the grandest hoax of mankind!!! Otherwise, you would have to believe that manmade greenhouse gases around the time of Christ melted the Greenland ice so that the Norsemen could farm and raise livestock there
By sunshine and thunder
June 29, 2008 11:48 AM | Link to this
As I understand it the ice cover at the North Pole was 8 million sq. miles this time last year and is now over 10 million sq. miles.
Jay?
By Bud Wiser
June 29, 2008 11:56 AM | Link to this
You mean people actually blogged on this crappo topic? Really now Jay, is the best you can do? The left loves global warming, because Al Gore has defined for the planet his parameters for what it supposedly is, although, it doesn’t touch him personally. Rumor has it from a disgruntled employee of the TVA that Gore’s house uses as much electricity in one week than is required to power about six “normal-sized” (that means the size home you and I live in, more or less) homes for one month. So much for personal responsibility.
The liberal media loves to turn on the burner for their imaginary ‘global warming’ campfire song, because it is the perfect cover for a Democratic controlled Congress that for the last two years have sat on their collective fat lazy azzez and passed not one piece of meaningful legislation for ANYTHING!
All the Dems have managed to do the past 2 years is encourage the price of gasoline to go higher and higher, so maybe the evil SUV drivers will park their vehicles and take the bus. Gasoline has risen over 80% during their inactivity. They say we need alternative fuels, and so do I; BUT, what do we use for fuel until these can be developed? It is their reasoning to block offshore drilling, to block ANWR drilling, to block everything that could be used as a stop-gap temporary solution until someone builds a cheap, fully electric or wind or solar or hot air powered vehicle. As an American I am sick and damn tired of all of these blow-hard politicians, Democrat and Republican alike, who are continually running around like chickens with their heads cut off, saying it is everyone’s fault but their own for the current fiasco. but neither party is offering short term meaningful solutions!
We need something to power our cars and our power plants while alternative sources are being explored and researched. It ain’t gonna show up on the 99 cent menu at Taco Bell tomorrow. Drill for oil. Dig the coal. Split the atoms. Worry about the other s* later, but Americans **need help now. If YOU (Congress) are not up to the job, and it is apparent even to the most ignorant maroons out there, then you must be replaced.
And to you global warming freakos, and whacked out environmentalists who are continuing to damage your country and yourselves by this monotonous bleating, GET A GRIP. Open your eyes to the pain and suffering of your neighbors, your friends, some of whom are making choices between having money to drive to work, or having the pocket cash to buy the kids some new clothes. I know that many of you don’t give a flying rat’s a* about anyone but yourself, and to you I say, press your lips together tightly and kiss the south side of that north bound donkey your neighbor is considering riding to the grocery store.
By Abomi Nation
June 29, 2008 1:00 PM | Link to this
Good God Bud, you’re hysterical.
Nobody says we will be all riding donkeys soon. PETA would be very much against that. Besides that, how would that improve the global warming situation? We would need millions of donkeys to meet our transportation needs and that would actually add to the global warming problem. Do some research, go to wikipedia. The gas produced by the donkeys would be worse than what our cars emit.
Donkeys will not solve our global warming/fuel price problem. There is a much better solution. Notice how the once bicycle clogged streets in China are now filled with small cars? Well guess what? They now have a surplus of bikes and are willing to sell about a billion of them to the United States. What a grand symbol of friendship that is. As they overtake us, and as we become more and more like the 3rd world country they used to be, they offer us their old bikes! Bikes are MUCH better than donkeys.
You do have a point about the global warming hypocrites though. Have you been to that global warming hypocrites website? You should, go to JohnMcCain.com. This big time global warming spokesman has the audacity to bellow the sky is falling global warming rhetoric at the same time maintaining mansions all over the western United States that use mucho electricity. Shameful.
Help cool global warming, buy a used Chuin Bicycle!
By Bud Wiser
June 29, 2008 4:26 PM | Link to this
I forgot my meds this morning.
I am much calmer now.
It took me seven minutes to type this blog entry.
By Copyleft
June 30, 2008 7:57 AM | Link to this
“Short-term solutions” are what got us into this mess. It’s like selling all your possessions to buy more crack; you’re only prolonging the problem and calling it a ‘short-term fix.’
By demwit
June 30, 2008 3:47 PM | Link to this
Has there ever been a time when ice was not at the North Pole? What did Santa do then??
By Truth
June 30, 2008 3:52 PM | Link to this
Does anyone realize that the the sun’s temp has gone up….
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