Home > Feeding Frenzy > Archives > 2008 > September > 15 > Entry
DEL.ICIO.USWhen you eat out do you share tastes with friends?
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
I recently had dinner with a group of “foodies.” It was one of those situations when everyone was dying to try everyone else’s dishes. Plates were graciously passed around for anyone to stick their fork in, even though many of us had barely met, let alone broken bread together.
I thought that was rather unabashed of the group to be so forthcoming with their meals. But I know it could have freaked out other types of diners. Like my friend, Dominick, who would have fled from the table.
Dominick is one of 11 children. Growing up they all fought to fill their plates and since then he’s guarded his food like a pirate’s treasure. When anyone even eyes his dish, he quickly sets them straight. There is never going to be a morsel leaving his plate for yours.
When it comes to dining out, there definitely seems to be sharers and protectors. Even within families, you see both sides. We dine frequently with a couple where one freely offers samples and the other refuses to make eye contact until his plate is clean.
On which side of the sharing situation do you fall? Is what is yours, yours? Or, is what everyone else is having too tempting? What about the person who asks for tastes but never offers in return?
Permalink | Comments (16) | Post your comment | Categories: Dining out
Comments
By momtoAlex&Max
September 15, 2008 12:36 PM | Link to this
This article is so funny. I grew up in an Italian household. My mother would cook enormous amounts of food. To this day, Sunday dinners are sacrosant at my parent’s place. Anyways, my mother makes this huge meals and if someone (anyone!) does not clean their plates twice she stares at them, striken, and says: “You did not like it…” (with Italian accent). It has become the family joke. So I am sharer, unless I’m at my mothers!
Contrast that to my husband’s household. His mother cooked little, cooked infrequently and cooked begrudgingly. There was never enough food, and it was not a money issue at all. Therefore, my husband will not share under any circumstances. At restaurants, when I want dessert, but don’t want the whole thing, he NEVER shares with me. He wants to eat the whole thing himself. Sigh…
By Lissa
September 15, 2008 12:50 PM | Link to this
Everyone passing around plates in a restaurant would bug me. I guess I fall somewhere in the middle on the sharing department. I often offer friends and family a taste of whatever I have if it is especially yummy. However, I wouldn’t want anyone to assume that they would get some of my meal just because they were there. I certainly wouldn’t do that with people I had just met.
By Becky
September 15, 2008 2:12 PM | Link to this
I’m like Lissa in this..Close friends, I’ll share with anytime..Heck, I have friends at work that we’ll all eat out of the same fork..I grew up next to youngest of 10 children, so we treasured our food also..
Lots of times, 2-3 of us at work will all order something different & then share it with each other..I don’t know if I would go out with people that I’ve never met before & do this..
By Stacey
September 15, 2008 2:38 PM | Link to this
For me the answer depends on who I’m dining with. My husband usually samples my food before I do when we go out so I’ve just come to expect it. Years ago my husband and I used to go to Applebee’s with a friend of his every Friday after work. His friend would order the steak quesadillas and I would order chicken quesadillas and we would share them. Also, the friend liked extra guacamole and I don’t like it so I would give him mine. We just had the understanding so even if one of us was away from the table when the food arrived we would just make the switch. My best friend and I are also close enough that I am comfortable sharing my plate with her or ordering dessert with two forks.
I’m not quite sure how sure how comfortable I would be with sharing a plate with casual aquaintances, though. If someone asked to try something I would probably cut them a piece and either put it on a bread plate or on the edge of my plate so they could get it. The exception would be appetizers since people commonly share appetizers.
By Jan
September 15, 2008 3:04 PM | Link to this
I can’t stand this!I say if you want to eat something in a restaurant order it yourself and donot expect other people to feed you what you ordered.Unless it is your children,stop doing it in public,it’s gross.I feel so uncomfortable with co-workers gounging in the food I ordered (and pay for )and they try to eat most of mine.I leave with the bill and they are full plus they have their leftovers in a to-go box!
By Who cares
September 15, 2008 3:13 PM | Link to this
Unless I am at a formal or business dinner, anything goes, as long as everyone uses their manners. Sharing gives the others a chance to sample and gets the conversation going. Just use a common fork/knife. Never use your own. My husband and I will also split an entree or dessert. I will order a side salad and he orders an agreed entree and salad. Restaurants give you so much food, therefore, 1/2 of an entree is the portion size you should eat anyway. Cuts down on calories. If there is anyone at the table that does not want to share, let it be said before the order is placed!
By Steve
September 15, 2008 3:29 PM | Link to this
.
Yes …
With restaurants giving huge portions these days, it only makes sense to share …
I usually split an entree with my g/f, and we each get a salad and side …
It saves about 15-20 bucks, and we don’t leave hungry …
.
By JJ
September 15, 2008 3:35 PM | Link to this
When I go out with my girlfriends, and there’s usually 10-15 of us, we each order something different. Then we play “pass the plates” and everyone takes a bite of food from the plate in front of them, then passes the plate to the neighbor on the left. It’s quite hysterical.
What’s funny is when the servers bring all the food out and ask who ordered what, we just tell it doesn’t matter. SO you never know what will be handed to you. But you take a bite and pass the plate to your neighbor. Great way to sample almost everything on a menu……ground rules are either appetizers or entrees, not both. One person can’t order an appetizer and another an entree. We all agree on what to order……
Then when the bill comes, we divide it equally.
By Becky
September 15, 2008 4:05 PM | Link to this
A funny thing to this..My niece used to work in a restaurant (in VA) & she always tells me & her Mom that only cheap people share a meal or have take home bags..
By Tyrone Biggums
September 15, 2008 5:01 PM | Link to this
I see no problem with sharing appetizers, entrees, or desserts with other people. But I do feel weird when people put their hands all over the bread, and I know they have not washed them beforehand. Gross!
By Kate
September 15, 2008 5:26 PM | Link to this
I come from a family of food sharers, so I expect to share when I go to a restaurant. My husband is not a sharer, so I drive him just a little crazy.
Side note, we went to a big birthday dinner for his cousin at a restaurant awhile back. The entire family was there, including in-laws of in-laws. Someone (I think it was the mother of the aunt’s brother in law) looked at my plate and said “Oooh, that looks good, can I have a bite?” as she reached her fork over. It made me happy since I’d never met her and she was already stealing food. :-)
By Lyn
September 16, 2008 6:30 AM | Link to this
My oldest sister thinks it is her right to stick her fork into your food at any given time. She doesn’t ask…she just digs….drives my husband crazy as she does this to him. He also comes from a very large family (14) and he guarded his food like pirate booty as well…..you just never knew if there was going to be a meal after the one you were eating. The last time she did this, he set her straight and she was shocked….can you believe it?? But, on the other hand, he and I always share a dinner when we dine out…..there is enough food to feed an army on one entree, so we save that money~
By share - sure thing
September 16, 2008 7:31 AM | Link to this
JJ’s plan sounds like a lot of fun. I don’t mind sharing at all as long as the forks have not yet been used. You get so much food, why not share. For me it makes it more fun. I can’t eat all of my food anyway, and I do take it home for another day - that way I don’t have to cook. The rare occasion we get dessert H and I share with two forks/spoons. Once when a group of co-workers went out, I shared a dessert with another gal and we were both just devouring it from the same plate with our separate forks - we provided the entertainment for the others, who thought it was hilarious the way we practically fought over it.
By Mike
September 16, 2008 8:19 AM | Link to this
I think some of the comments don’t distinguish between sharing and splitting. If there are as many food items as there are people, it’s sharing, as JJ and the original post describe.
Splitting items can be tacky - if it’s a place where the portions are huge and you commonly see people leaving with leftovers, it’s fine, but in a fine dining establishment where the entree isn’t meant to astonish and overwhelm with its size, then it can just look cheap.
One restaurant I go to frequently does a special feature with a soup, salad, appetizer (as entree) and dessert.
As far as sharing, I’m fine with it as long as it doesn’t turn into a circus.
By Karen
September 17, 2008 12:52 PM | Link to this
I have been in the hospitality industry for years and was dating a chef for a number of years. Because of this, I am very accustomed to sharing what ever I am eating, even with people I have just met. I rarely ever ordered for myself when we would go out. I would just asked him what dishes he wanted to try that night and we would share whatever dishes were ordered. When I ate in his restaurant with family or friends, there was one rule that had to be followed. No one was allowed to order the same dish as another person. He wanted us to try as many of his dishes as possible, so sharing was definitly encouraged.
By Mike
September 19, 2008 8:33 AM | Link to this
The only way this is going to happen is with my partner or with a clean cut of food up front. As well meaning as people may be, it’s too easy to pass nasty things along to others when multiple utinsils and hands are touching your food. That’s just gross.