Feeding Frenzy

By Stan

August 19, 2008 9:28 AM | Link to this

Meh, a bucket of KFC with large sides work for me.

Depends on the who they are and what the need is.

By Amy

August 19, 2008 12:54 PM | Link to this

This is frustrating, because the blogs that could really be helpful, no one responds to. I haven’t done meats like you mentioned because I’m afraid they’d dry out when reheated. I’d love to know how to prepare foods for travel and refrigeration before eating.

By Michelle

August 19, 2008 1:06 PM | Link to this

Lately I have been doing a bbq tray. Two or three types of meats, several sauces, some buns and a few sides. It is significantly less expensive than a ham or something - can be easily stored and is usually something nobody else has brought!

By anne

August 19, 2008 1:06 PM | Link to this

My daughter’s class has had several families in the past couple of years that requested help with meals. We have 3 go-to meals: chicken and rice; chicken enchiladas; and baked ziti. The family usually had a large cooler with ice in the school office, so the donating families could just put their contributions in the cooler; the family took the cooler home when kids were picked up; and the cooler was returned the next day. We always include a vegetable, tossed green salad, and a dessert. Rolls are optional. These entrees also freeze well in case the families get overwhelmed with donations. Other families donated lunch and snack items or breakfast items, depending on the need.

By Stacey

August 19, 2008 1:17 PM | Link to this

Meat and three is a good option when you know it’s something that the family will eat. When my friend was only bedrest for a difficult pregnancy, I made things like lasagna and spaghetti that I knew the whole family would eat and that would also freeze well in case they didn’t want to eat it right away. I also don’t see anything wrong with Stan’s suggestion either.

When I was growing up, it was common for people to bring food to people who had a death in the family, were sick, or had just had a baby. Do people still do that? A couple of years ago my neighbor died unexpectedly (leaving a husband and 3 school-aged kids). I noticed a constant stream of visitors but no one was bringing food. I was really busy and didn’t have time to cook anything so I just went to the grocery store and bought a variety of cold cuts, different types of bread, chips, cookies and sodas. I was a little embarrassed to take it over but they were really grateful that I did. She died during the day and people were coming straight over after work and hadn’t been able to go home and cook so a couple of ladies from their church fixed sandwiches for everyone. The week after the funeral I did cook a meal and took over for them though.

By Laura

August 19, 2008 1:31 PM | Link to this

My standard meal is something like lasagna or stuffed shells, tossed salad and garlic bread. Since lasanga-type dishes are a popular “go to” dish, I have done meatloaf, mashed potatoes, green beens and rolls. Soups and chili’s are also great for winter type foods. I tend to lean towards comfort type food that can be frozen, etc.

By JJ

August 19, 2008 1:59 PM | Link to this

Stacey - A girlfriend of mine makes what she calls “death lasagne”. When she makes a lasange, she makes two, and freezes one in case someone in her rather large family dies. I love the name.

Also, my next door neighbor had knee surgery and couldn’t walk. She is a stay at home mom, and her husband travels ALOT, two to three weeks away at a time. And she has a 13 year old boy. I went to publix, got one of their rotisserie (can’t spell) chickens, along with some mac & cheese, a couple cans of green beans, and dessert. They were so appreciative of that meal…….

Then, when I had my surgery, the boy was at my door, inviting me over for dinner, asking if there was anything at all I needed. His mom sent him over with an special-shaped ice pack for me (for my neck). He came and walked my dogs for me every evening while I rested. He even mowed my lawn.

By Yvette

August 19, 2008 2:17 PM | Link to this

Michelle’s idea is a good one. While my husband was in the hospital (and I was at home with our newborn) a friend brought over a bbq plate complete with sauce, buns, sides (potato salad and baked beans) and tea. It heated up well and got me through several meals.

By Joy in Teaching

August 19, 2008 3:05 PM | Link to this

I always keep the makings for a quick chicken casserole on hand for such emergencies as this: A refrigerated pie crust, a couple of cans of chicken, a can of cream of chicken soup, a can of veg all, a can of broth, some margarine, and seasonings. You can throw it together in minutes…and then bake it until it’s brown and crusty and it is SO good and comforting.

Like someone else keeps a “death lasagne” in their freezer, I keep a “death poundcake” in there as it is just as easy to make 2 as it is one and they freeze for up to 6 months.

I really like the old traditions of people taking care of neighbors, co workers, and church members in times of need. It teaches our children the value of compassion…and it helps us to get to know our neighbors just a little better.

By itsmorenamorena

August 19, 2008 3:25 PM | Link to this

Broccoli Casserole and Roasted Chicken. I can put together a casserole in less than an hour and I’ll usually pick up a chicken from Publix or Costco. That can feed a family for a couple days at least.

By PJ

August 19, 2008 3:34 PM | Link to this

Since most of my share meals these days are “new baby” meals for families with young children, I like to make pasta that all can eat. I have a go-to crispy chicken casserole that freezes well and in a pinch, a run to Honeybaked Ham for the special of 2 lbs of meat plus 3 sides. They have great ham, turkey & BBQ plus good veggies. I agree that meals are always a great way to meet new neighbors and help take care of friends and family in times of need. We ate well for a month after the birth of our 2nd thanks to friends, neighbors and fellow MOMS Club members.

By TN Girl

August 19, 2008 3:48 PM | Link to this

I’m from the south and yes, people still take food to the family when there has been a death. When I was a child, my grandmother would cook an entire meal. But now, it’s so easy to pick up cold cuts & chips or chicken and mac salad from the grocery store. By doing so, it shows that you care & that you want the family to keep up their strength.

By new mom

August 19, 2008 3:52 PM | Link to this

One of my favorite meals to fix for families with new babies is a huge salad, knowing they will have lots of other yummy comfort food and might want to eat something green! ;) Anyway, I keep it very simple—make a regular “big” salad w/ veggies, buy a publix rotisserie chicken, cut it up and add it to the top. I also usually add a side of black bean & corn salsa—I can’t remember everyting I put in it, but it’s basically a can of black beans, can of kernel corn, and some spices. It adds some kick to the salad.

Once when some neighbors had a baby, we decided to grill out hamburgers on the night we were bringing them dinner, and brought them their own ‘picnic’ with hamburgers, baked beans, potato salad, & some cookies for the kids. It was so easy, and they said they liked it because it wasn’t a casserole! (Don’t get me wrong, I love casseroles, but week after week of casseroles can get old…)

Thanks JJ for pointing me to this blog. :)

By Becky

August 19, 2008 4:01 PM | Link to this

Lasagne, chicken & rice casserole, rum cake..I pretty much will take whatever I think the family will enjoy..When a neighbor passed away about 8 years ago, her daughter wanted me to make fried salmon patties, biscuits & potato salad..I usually always make biscuits or corn bread to take somewhere..

By Lucia

August 19, 2008 4:05 PM | Link to this

I like to make a meal that’s nourishing and comforting. My go-to is homemade, from-scratch chicken and dumplings. I’ve also made roast chicken with vegetable side dishes. I always include something baked, like muffins or brownies, and something for breakfast or snacking, like my homemade granola. When I cook like this, I double up, so my family gets a meal, too.

By Lissa

August 19, 2008 4:07 PM | Link to this

A husband recovering from non-life threatening surgery? Is that really covered dish-worthy? If you really wanted to help, you could offer to watch the kids for a while.

Such meals should only be brought for a death or birth in the family (because there will be tons of people there), or for people who live alone/only care-taker who are unable to get food for themselves. I’ve never heard of bringing food for a spouse recovering from surgery unless it were a major life-threatening one, like open-heart surgery. A torn ACL? No.

By MOT

August 19, 2008 4:29 PM | Link to this

Yes lots of people do still look after neighbors and friends and fellow parishoners here in the south——in our church throughout the world—- we actually are assigned a few families each, that when somethning happens that they need a meal for long or short term it is coordinated and taken care of in short order.

I have carried on that tradition in any neighborhood we have lived in. And it has been done for us by both church members and community and neighbors.

When I had a set of stillborn twins, many came together, and we had meals for weeks, but one of the family favs was what someone mentioned: honeybaked ham—-they brought us the turkey, ham and sides and desserts but it was from my husband’s office, it would be a bit pricey for one family to do but it was really great food that also was comforting.

Foods I have fixed:

Those infamous funeral potatoes with cubed ham mixed in.

Any Italian dish is a great one for warm-ups b/c the flavor seems to get better with each warm up. Lots of spaghetti (families with kids seem to appreciate this), or spaghetti pie, easier version of spaghetti, easier to tote, serve, store.

Pepper Steak—-warms up great, stays moist with the sauce, great flavors but kids can remove the peppers and onions if desired, served over rice topped with crunchy chinese noodles are also a hit with kids and adults.

I try to not do casseroles for families with kids unless I know they will eat what is in it mixed together. A lot of kids are picky and want it all separated.

Homemade mac/cheese, with a meat loaf, or roast beef, or roast chicken, baked chicken thighs or drum sticks.

If a family is in need over a long period of time, I will bake a turkey, and bag into several meals to freeze, and arrive with one hot meal from the meat (with mashed potatoes/gravy, veggies) and then the other bagged parts to freeze with instructions of what to put with it and how to best warm it up and I usually try to take the items that are suggested to go with the frozen ones.

To any of the meals above I add a fresh fruit salad (kids especially seem to down fruit salad better than veggie salads plus is extra colorful and sweet), rolls and a dessert. I try to make it a special dessert for kids and parents. Having been on the receiving end of meals, it always seems to add extra healing power when it is obvious it was done with extra effort and a dose of love.

I have ALWAYS made sure I use ONLY disposable dishes/trays or things I do not want them to have to return to me. Any reason to be getting a meal is stress enough without adding another chore to clean and remember to return someone’s dishes. In addition, I add a package of paper plates, cups, napkins, plastic ware so all they have to do is throw it all away at the end with no dishes to wash. There are plenty of pretty enough serving things made of aluminum or even plastic now.

By Amy

August 20, 2008 12:02 PM | Link to this

Thank you everybody!

By Becky

August 21, 2008 10:30 AM | Link to this

lissa, old school south doesn’t care if it’s non life threatening or not, if a family needs any help, we’re just there..I have cooked many meals for friends that had minor surgery & will keep doing it…That’s what friends are for..MOT, sorry about your twins..

By Lissa

August 21, 2008 4:52 PM | Link to this

Becky - that must be really old school then. I’m 30 and born & raised in the south (further south than ATL, in fact). If it’s a close friend, sure - I can see that. However, for a teacher? Nah. If you’re not close enough to the person to not have known about it beforehand (non-emergency, that is), that’s not close enough to feel obligated to send a dish.

By FCM

August 21, 2008 8:23 PM | Link to this

It does depend on whom it is and how much time I have. A dessert is often something I make for things that are ‘non life threatening”. Fortunately there has been little of that close by—I don’t do food to out of town stuff, unless I am going there.

If it is a family with kids and I have no time, some gift certificates for Pizza delivery work well. Another I like to do for expectant fathers at the office: Gift Certificates to Chili’s and the like. The Daddy is able to pick up dinner because Mommy has been timewarped with the baby.

As to when food is appropriate, I was appreciative of whatever when I was out of work (lay off). Food was not offered but would have been accepted…Now, I take that back, several friends took turns taking me to lunch to keep my spirits up.

As for actually making the food…I do pasta cassaroles…Plain as can be for people I don’t know well..and crazier for those I do.

By Becky

August 22, 2008 9:12 AM | Link to this

lissa, you might be right about it being old school (I’m 46)..I just also know that that is the way my mother raised me..She would be spinning in her grave if she thought I wasn’t still cooking for people in need..

By Stacey

August 22, 2008 10:07 AM | Link to this

LOL at Becky. I’m 38 and very old school. I grew up in Mississippi and people still bring food and flowers when people have a death in the family. I understand what Lissa is saying too about only taking food for major illness/surgeries of close friends and neighbors but I can’t say that I’ve heard of doing it for a teacher or casual acquaintance. I think it is a very thoughtful thing to do, I just don’t know that I would do it. I think some it may just stem from the fact that we don’t know our neighbors like we used to.

When my husband’s stepsister died last year I noticed a lot of people brought cards and some gave money (to her parents), but not a lot of people brought food. She was in the hospital for a week before she died and some of the ministries at our church took food to the hospital for the family members who were there with her. The church members also generally provide food the the repast after funerals.

By Becky

August 22, 2008 1:45 PM | Link to this

Stacey, I cook for close friends & friends at church..If someone at church knows of someone else that needs help, we all cook for them..I guess I’m just a really old soul..

By Heather

August 22, 2008 4:00 PM | Link to this

Spinach pie is a great choice to take to someone. It is great hot or cold. I like to roast french fingerling potatoes with herbs and olive oil and the juice of a lemon and salt(450 degree oven, 20 minutes covered, 20 minutes uncovered). The potatoes are great cold or warmed up they can be served with/without sour cream.

By Patty

November 11, 2008 4:04 PM | Link to this

Don’t forget to take paper plates, napkins, paper cups, plastic cutlery, etc. to a grieving family. That way there will be a minimum of items to wash up. Plus, the plates and utensils are great when there are a multitude of visitors who all need to be fed.

By deidre_NC

November 12, 2008 6:22 PM | Link to this

i am 55 and my mama and granny would for sure roll over in their graves if i (and my sisters) didnt take food to ones in need..whether death-surgery (minor or major) or whatever…if my friends have the flu i will try to help especially where there are kids—-i grew up (atlanta) getting tons of great food when someone died-but when my dad died one friend bought nothing but paper goods—plates-napkins etc..it was awesome..and one bought a honey baked ham and all kinds of sandwich fixings..those really were the best. not much clean up and very easy to make. i try to bring stuff like that-sometimes a whole meal…depends on the amount of people there and the occasion.

By deidre_NC

November 12, 2008 6:30 PM | Link to this

ps—read the sweet potato queen funeral food cookbook—great recipes and hilarious