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Friday, December 14, 2007
Is this a trick question? Well, you won’t stump me
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
Dear Mr. Smithee,
How many actors and actresses have been honored enough to have an Oscar, Golden Globe, Tony and Grammy? I know Rita Moreno is one of them.
JOSEPH CAMP, Carrollton
Dear Could This Be a Trick Query?
For multiple years, people have wondered who in the world of eternal egos has been so wonderful that his or her eminence has acquired an Oscar, an Emmy, a Tony and a Grammy.
But you are the first I have ever heard to inquire about the ubiquitous Golden Globe while excising the Emmy.
As you know, I am all about fulfilling the cinematic needs of my ever-gracious clientele.
So … those actors and actresses who have been awarded an Oscar, Golden Globe, Tony and Grammy: Rita Moreno (you’re so smart Joe), John Gielgud, Audrey Hepburn, Whoopi Goldberg, Barbra Streisand, Liza Minnelli, Henry Fonda and Judy Garland.
By the way, there are non-actors who have done the same but are dear people Joe doesn’t care anything about. Like Marvin Hamlisch, Mike Nichols, Elton John, Alan Jay Lerner, Tim Rice and Andrew Lloyd Webber.
And just because, here are those who possess an Oscar, a Golden Globe, a Tony, a Grammy and an Emmy: Rita Moreno, Marvin Hamlisch, Audrey Hepburn, Mike Nichols, Whoopi Goldberg, Barbra Streisand and Liza Minnelli.
ALAN
P.S. You get a commemorative book about the making of “Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street” and an “Ask Alan Smithee” T-shirt.
Dear Mr. Smithee,
I have just finished watching “The Searchers,” a movie I consider to be among the best Westerns made. But I have some unanswered questions. I surely bow to your superior knowledge.
In two parts, while Ward Bond is talking to John Wayne he references the shootings of three men from the Futterman family. During the second time he is ready to arrest Wayne but they’re interrupted. The movie does not relate anything more about the murders. Why would they bring up something so important that would reflect on Wayne’s character and not go into any detail?
Second: During the battle between Chief Scar and the Rangers, which takes place at a river, Jeffrey Hunter suddenly seems to become terrified and throws his rifle down and puts his hands to his face. “Ole Mose” picks up the rifle and starts to shoot it. Why would this happen with a man who had lived his whole life in the savage West? In every other part of the movie he is as courageous as any of the others.
JACK ZINAMAN, Greenacres City, Fla.
Dear Long-Winded,
Could it be that one — meaning you, Jack — might have dozed off during a good portion of the film?
Or perhaps you watched the movie on an insufferable TV network or cable channel that chose to edit a masterpiece into something a tad shorter that fits better with commercials?
Because, my friend, the film indeed shows you all you need to know. Long before the scene you speak of involving the Futterman shootings, we see Wayne’s encounter with the lead Futterman, who is trying to excise as much reward money as possible while claiming to know the whereabouts of Wayne’s kidnapped niece. We also see the Futterman men sneaking into Wayne’s campsite at night to commit robbery and likely murder. But Wayne is ready and kills them.
We see enough to know not to like or feel sorry for the Futterman folk.
As for Hunter’s reaction, know that his character is a counterpoint to Wayne’s unforgiving, ready-to-kill loner. They are all shooting at charging Indians. Note that Mose shouts out, “You got him, Martin” just before Hunter stares straight ahead, tosses off his rifle and buries his head in his hands.
We must presume that Martin, being young, has just killed his first human being. Perhaps he is frightened (who wouldn’t be?) but I suggest there’s more remorse in his actions than fear.
Later, Wayne’s character scalps an Indian without blinking an eye.
The intent at the river is to show you the flip side.
Martin has a heart.
ALAN
P.S. You get an “Alien vs. Predator: Requiem” tree ornament and an “Ask Alan Smithee” T-shirt.
HAVE A QUESTION FOR MR. SMITHEE?
E-mail him at alansmithee@ajc.com or go to accessAtlanta.com and click on Movies. Please include your name, city and daytime phone number. Mr. Smithee can’t reply to every request, but inquiries chosen for publication will receive movie-related prizes.
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The best version of ‘B-b-b-b-blue Christmas’
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
At my house, I’ve heard recordings of Elvis singing “BLUE CHRISTMAS” maybe a million times. So on occasion, I like to toss in this version from another, equally immortal artist.
En-en-en-en-en-en-enjoy!
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