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Contest: Best travel-writing cliches
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
So you read — maybe in a brochure, maybe in a travel article, maybe on the Net somewhere — “Life on this island goes on at a slumbering pace.”
What it means: This may be the most boring place on earth.
Or “A local breakfast can be enjoyed in the back garden terrace.”
Which really means, of course: Savor hard-boiled eggs, hard bread and hard cheese as you swat at bees.”
Ah, the world of travel writing. Not really euphemisms in the strict sense, but frequently not really accurate either. I’m not talking about great travel writing, like Paul Theroux, but the kind that seems to ooze along in promotional writing and sometimes the mainstream media.
N.W. “Red” Pope, a retired and well-travelled businessman from Arizona, has collected a lot of these phrases, and his own interpretations (those are his above), in a fun little paperback called “Travel Speak.”
Here’s another. “English spoken here.” Which Pope knows is usually “Map two dollah, scarf two dollah, belt two dollah.”
It’s contest time again. Send in your favorite travel cliche, piece of flowery prose or euphemism, and what it really means. The best entry will receive my copy of “Travel Speak.” We’ll keep the contest open till Monday.
Permalink | Comments (5) | Categories: Books
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By Lily Toad
March 7, 2008 3:40 PM | Link to this
“Leave your worries and cares behind” means “we have your credit card number.”
By Sheila Hudson
March 9, 2008 10:49 AM | Link to this
“Rustic, romantic, and roomy” means barren, without electricity, and a bath down the hall.
By Kate
March 9, 2008 6:26 PM | Link to this
Off-topic, but I had to mention this—
Re: Phil’s review of “The Duppy” by Anthony C. Winkler——“‘The Duppy’ is more like Kurt Vonnegut Jr. stringing up Mitch Albom’s ‘The Five People You Meet in Heaven’ like a pinata and beating it with a stick.”
This is a dam* fine description. Makes me want to buy the book (well, that and the “ribald sex scenes in the afterlife written in Jamaican patois”—I’m a sucker for that).
Well done.
By Jeff
March 10, 2008 10:15 AM | Link to this
“Open Bar” means “Get as many drinks as you want, but we’re going to use as little alcohol as we can get away with to make them.”
By Kirk Schmitt
March 10, 2008 11:16 PM | Link to this
“Island time” really means: You probably won’t be here next week, so why should I care if you want your…today, or tomorrow, or day after tomorrow or even sometime before you leave. Besides, my cousin owns the store so go buy your needs from him.