Fayette.Talk

By Bill

September 19, 2007 7:50 AM | Link to this

Yes, I’d allow my teen to do this. After all, your daughter made a decision about what she wanted and then took the steps to make it possible. It is probably too much to hope that my teen will start saving for college or retirement, so this money is disposable income anyway. Is one big ticket item any worse than five lesser priced items?

By KEITH

September 19, 2007 7:52 AM | Link to this

WHO CARE BOUT ALL DEM WITE TEENAGER WASTIN ALL DEY MONY WHUT WE NEEDS IS LESS WITE MAN LAWS AN BE GIT VICK BACK ON DE FIELD SO DE FALCONS BE WINNIN SOME MO AN VICK BE GWAN GIT DAT RING NOE WHUT IM SAYIN

By Teddy

September 19, 2007 7:59 AM | Link to this

My teenager must save 50% of every dollar earned. That money is her “take to college” money and cannot be touched for anything else.

The other 50% is hers to spend as she pleases (of course, nothing inappropriate…).

I’d probably boil over an iPhone, too, and would certainly try to talk her out of it (likely to be stolen, lost, broken, etc., etc.), but ultimately, I’d respect her decision to buy it.

Isn’t parenting hard?

By JJ

September 19, 2007 8:20 AM | Link to this

I don’t think I would allow my 15 year old to purchase a $400 phone. Even with her own money, that’s insane. First of all she doesn’t need it.

My daughter makes a great living working at Applebees. She must deposit her entire paycheck in her savings account, and 1/2 of her tip outs every night. She is a hostess and gets at least $30-$50 a night tip outs. She does not need that much “pocket” money.

She has an envelope system. She puts X amount of dollars towards her hair care, make up, etc. She puts another X amount into another envelope for “fun” things, like dinner with friends, football games, etc. Yet another envelope with X dollars for clothes she wants to buy. She has given herself a monthly budget and puts the rest away.

I don’t believe I would allow her to make a huge $400 purchase at the age of 15.

I want my daughter to learn to take care of money responsibly. She must save first, then play.

By fk

September 19, 2007 8:22 AM | Link to this

Yes, I would, and I agree with Bill. I have a 16 y/o old son. If he can pass on other things in order to save an extra $400 to make such a large purchase, he can have it. Plus, paying the $20/month fee is the beginning of setting a budget.

Our rule is, 1/3 of the paycheck goes into his savings account, a small amount goes to the house fund and he gets the remainder. He can do whatever he wants with the remainder. His savings account will pay for his gas and part of his car insurance. My mother charged all of my siblings and I “rent” while we lived at home, once we started working. It was a forced savings account, but we did not know it. That small amount of money forked over each week was definitely better spent as an adult than it ever would have been if I let it slip thru my fingers as a teenager. My parents gave us a (surprise) $3,500 check when we purchased our house back in 1991. It was the $10 -$25/week “rent” she charged me in high school and after college, while I lived at home.

By Feeling your pain

September 19, 2007 9:08 AM | Link to this

Let’s be honest-she made a $1000+ purchase-$400 for the phone and at least $720 for service for the next three years. If she is going to college, she should realize that the money could significantly help to defray the huge costs of her education.

Having said that, if your daughter has made the small but numerous sacrifices that it takes to save the money for something that is special to her, I would be supportive in that process. Of course, if she slips her $400 phone into her $250 purse and walks away in her $300 shoes, etc., you have a problem.

By lovelyliz

September 19, 2007 9:10 AM | Link to this

As long as the daughter is saving $$$, she should be allowed to do whatever she wants with the rest providing that it’s legal of course. A $400 iPhone is rather extravagant, but if it turns out to be too much and when she can’t afford to do this or that, you can remind her that this extravagance has a price.

By KEITH

September 19, 2007 10:00 AM | Link to this

WHO CARE BOUT ALL DEM WITE TEENAGER WASTIN ALL DEY MONY WHUT WE NEEDS IS LESS WITE MAN LAWS AN BE GIT VICK BACK ON DE FIELD SO DE FALCONS BE WINNIN SOME MO AN VICK BE GWAN GIT DAT RING NOE WHUT IM SAYIN

By Jen

September 19, 2007 10:19 AM | Link to this

Well…whether or not I would agree would depend on a few factors:

The initial purchase itself should be a huge percentage of her gross income, either. Otherwise it’s teaching her to live above her means.

I mean, I’m young, 32, with a first grader. I get the technology phase. I have a Blackberry. But…to me, earning something isn’t as simple as having enough money RIGHT NOW to buy it…

By Tim

September 19, 2007 10:29 AM | Link to this

Folks, an iPhone costs at least $ 60.00 a month. That’s the cheapest plan they offer.

By tc

September 19, 2007 10:36 AM | Link to this

Of course I would let my 16yr old daughter buy the phone. She worked for it and made other sacrifices, so why not? Not to mention, since she spent her own hard earned money on it, I’m sure she’ll take much better care than if I had bought it for her. Look back on all the stupid things WE bought for them growing up (game boxes, etc) and I think it will click with you that this is not that big of a deal money wise :)

By Tim

September 19, 2007 11:04 AM | Link to this

That $400.00 iPhone will end up costing minimally $2000.00. $400.00 + $60 per month * 12 months * 2 year contract.

By JJ

September 19, 2007 11:06 AM | Link to this

TC Not that big of a deal moneywise? $400 for a phone? You must be loaded.

I don’t want my kid thinking that just because she has her “own” money that she can do whatever with it she wants…that’s not what I am teaching her. Your kid will be mortgaged to the hilt, and living WAY beyond her means with an attitude like that.

By DB

September 19, 2007 11:17 AM | Link to this

It would have killed me, too, but ultimately, she earned the money and it was her decision on how to spend it. They don’t learn how to make decisions unless we give them practice in actually LIVING with the decisions they make! It’s not as though adults always make the wisest decisions on how to spend their money, either, is it?

As long as she’s pretty responsible on her other spending, I wouldn’t have stopped her, but she would have definitely gotten “the talk” about technological obsolescence (“how much will it cost in a year?”), it’s reliability (“HOW many times did we have to have the iPod fixed?”) and commitment to the AT&T contract, to make sure she had considered all the factors. After that, you have to let them make decisions. If it turns out to be a poor decision, $400 is not such a bad price to pay for a “learning opportunity.” (Certainly, it’s a lot cheaper than that @#&^! Porsche my husband and I bought in 1986!)

She’ll probably take exquisite care of it, since it was HER money that bought it!

By Filster

September 19, 2007 11:21 AM | Link to this

A topic close to home. We bought my 11-year old daughter a cell phone last Christmas, in part as a way to be able to keep in touch with her and for unexpected circumstances (such as, on the wy home she wants to stay at a friend’s house after school instead of coming straight home and the like). Of course, after several months the Razorv3 was old hat and she asked for a newer, “cooler” phone (I Said no). Of course she has seen, and asked for, the iPhone. She receives an allowance, and it is the 50/50 split that seems common with other bloggers. She wil begin babysitting soon and the 50/50 will remain in effect. When she earns enough money or has sufficient income to either buy something like an iPhone and afford its monthly service, then I guess I’ll have to make a decision then. Another lesson to be learned here, however, involves getting one major item instead of several lesser ones. Case in point, my daughter asked for an iPod for Christmas. I told her that it’s very expensive and if that was what she wanted it was probably all she would get for Christmas instead of the dozen or so lesser presnets. Could she accept opening one presnet and watching her younger sister open the regular number of smaller presents. I asked her to think about it. If she decides yes, it will be a good lesson that there are some things worth saving and sacrificing for, and that she needs to learn how to assess situations, weigh her options and make a decision she will be held accountable. While tears on Christmas morn may happen (I hope thye don’t though), she will have to think this out to make a decision and then live with it.

By posterchild

September 19, 2007 1:09 PM | Link to this

Keith:

I don’t think we “noe whut” you are saying. Perhaps if you spoke English…

By Charles

September 25, 2007 1:39 PM | Link to this

I have 3 daughters aged 25, 17 and 15 so I identify with your situation. But I would not have let her buy a phone that expensive. You are under the false assumption that the money that your daughter earns is HER money. She is still a minor and you have the right to control what she buys with the money she earns. You provide a place for her to live and furnish her daily meals and clothe her.

It is always a good decision to veto a buying decision that is not in the best interest of the child. Does your child buy ALL of her own clothes? Pay for her own entertainment? I have had many a disagreement with my daughters over the years concerning their spending habits. It is not an easy task, but if in your gut you think it is a bad decision then exercise your parental right to veto a buying decision.

By Clay

September 25, 2007 1:53 PM | Link to this

Tim- It is $20/month considering the girl already had a previous contract (my guess is the parent pays for a family plan).

I don’t know that a 15 year old needs it, but it is not a bad deal considering it cost $20/month to get data service to a Sync phone.

I am not a parent, so I can not know what it is like to deal with this, but my fear is this girl could be setting herself up for disappointment when the phone only lasts two years, or its lost, or broken.

However, I remember my first large frivolous purchase as a teenager was about $400. I was 17 and made a decent amount of money. I had plenty to save, plenty to spend for fun, plenty for expenses, and could save up $400 in a few months on top of that. Of course I was 17. I got a car stereo. Not one of those loud obnoxious subwoofers, but a high quality speaker set and a nice CD player. I did not need to have this, but at the time I liked it. I had it for about 7 years and I don’t think I would change my decision if I could go back in time.

However, I also remember it was a little bit harder making money when I was 15.

Of course if she does set herself up for disappointment, it could turn into an great learning experience that could effect the way she spends money and weigh in different risks well into her adult life.

By Bill T

September 25, 2007 4:23 PM | Link to this

She’s 15. She’s worked hard for the money, let her get the item. There will be plenty of times later on when the power bill/gas for the car/food bill will have to be paid in lieu of toys and fun.

You might have her consider this equation….How many hours of work does it take to buy this ipod, pair of shoes, or dress? When you think of how many hours of work it takes you often find a way to put off buying it.

By L2Parent

September 26, 2007 3:49 PM | Link to this

“…and simply reminded myself, there really wasn’t anything I could do to stop her from using her money to buy the must-have item.”

GG L2Parent If you don’t know what this means, ask your daughter. Better yet, ask her if you should ask her. You’re waiting on her approval for everything, right? I mean, what kind of friend would you be if you didn’t let her have the phone, right? You want to be that “cool” mom, right? Worst excuse ever. You have every right to tell your daughter how to spend “her” money. She is YOUR daughter. Sure she is an individual but I love this post-modern parenting fiasco we have gotten ourselves into. “Well officer, at least she earned the money she used to purchase the marijuana.” Way to parent there Abby. Here’s to another spoiled-rotten rich kid from Fayette getting the one-up on their parents. They did it when I grew up there and they are still doing it now. Perhaps you should lay off the Prozac and Ambien and focus a bit more on being a parent and teaching your daughter that not having the latest and greatest isn’t the end of the world. The inmates are running the prisons! Yippeee!!!!

Last time I checked you had to sign an agreement, which usually meant getting a credit check or providing some type of credit to back up the payments in lieu of nonpayment. So you’re making her pay the $20/month ipod fee, but you are still paying for the monthly service fee for her phone service? Wow what a sacrifice for the young lass…great lesson mom!

By Get real

September 26, 2007 4:45 PM | Link to this

I am an adult parent of a 10 year old daughter and I don’t think it is any more excessive than spending over a thousand bucks for a microwave when it first came out or almost that amount of money on a VCR back in the 70s or 80s for crappy quality. i don’t see anything wrong with her spending her own money that she works for. I say good for her in taking a step towards responsibility. Do we really need a BMW? Do we really need a house with a pool? No, it’s excessive but, we are here to be productive and do things that make us happy. Life is an adventure.

By Reg L

September 26, 2007 6:32 PM | Link to this

Some SAWB wrote this. Not funny you moron…….. With all of the crap going on in the world, who gives a rat’s behind if she has a $400 dollar phone or not. In 2 years it will match the $20,000 car mommy and daddy will buy her, so what’s the problem? We have created a society of kids who feel entitled to the high end things in life without any idea of it’s true cost. I applaud the fact that she earns her own money, but I still think it’s an excessive expenditure. As long as her parents (I sense they are) are financially sound, then she will evolve into a self-indulging little princess with a life riddled with selfish choices. Hopefully those choices won’t matter when it’s time to put her parents in a nice nursing home. I’m sure all of her selfishness will be set aside to make a sound decision. God Bless Fayetteville…oops I meant America.

By TINY TOT

September 27, 2007 9:25 AM | Link to this

I would let mii child buy what ever they want as long as iyts age appropriate for them.. An iphone i would get for mii self not for a 15 year old child they arnt responsable yet well at least sum are….

Well she’s not mii child so i dont care im just given mii oppion